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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (April 3, 1911)
THK I1KK: OMAHA. MONDAY. APRIL .1. 1011. pllie (eeg Jrxe agaziiie )a y i nOlie BEES Junior Bii'fhrjgy Book Tho Tired Business Man Tclln Krifnd Wife That IVy Will lie Vrarrta- BY WALTER A. SINCLAIR. Mrs. IS l .1 X: V I r "Luther Burbank Is going to have an vfnl time of it trying to mk( a model Woy otit nf the common or gartlcn variety. even though garden work Is his specialty," observed Krlemi W If". "When he gets to work boys will be vegetables," paraphrased the Tired Busi ness Man. "J,ct uii hope that Mr. Hurbank won't repeat Ills experiment with the cac tun. wlili li in near to boy nature as I can Imagine, and produce the spineless boy. Also let hope' that his experiments In the vegetable world won't lead lilm to be lieve that every boy la a cabbage head, f'ven thouKh his action may Indicate that be la an onion. And they usually have to attain man's estate before they prove to be beets. "I have greAt hopes for Mr. Hurbank. Ie haa done about everything but make two-dollar bills grow whero one blossomed eviounly. Some carping critics who have heir own Idea w hich they never put Into j practice think that because ne is a aear om bachelor ha haa no license to try bringing up boy like a prize pumpkin. Now that's all Junk, becauHe we have ",'n P'nty of doting fathers who began doting long be fore they reached their dotat?e, and who couldn't compete with Luther in the garden truck specialty, who have raised aotne sons with heads llko flocky- Kord cantelopes or Hubbard aouashoe. Jf they can do that why can't Mr. Hurbank raise a first-class future Burbank president? "Of course, most- of us think boys ought to raise themselves. Just imagine Bur bank trying tp Improve the class of the Huckleberry KinnJ In the first place, he could probably prune off all the long hair, rags and tatters, dead cats, warts, dirt and eussedness. The result might be per fwtttly lovely, but not as Interesting as the fflglnal. "Jt appears that Kxhlblt A, upon whom Mr. Burbank la going to concentrate his 'skill, Is of a truant disposition, given to roving. Of course, that's really terrible, and when the great grafter produces the nonroving boy he will be hailed as a great discoverer wntll said boy grows to man hood and insists on hanging around the house and letting 1'a support him rather than getting out to work. I wouldn't know how to cure a boy of the roves un less it was to saw his legs off and then lock hlin In the attic. Kven then, with aeroplanes flying everywhere you couldn't e sure the specimen wouldn't wing away like Mercury. . l 9W r -III'.. ' ll"MI, "HOY." . "Now Is the t:me of the year for Mr. Hurbank to try grafting on Ills specimen a batting eye and a base-stealing pair of feet. If he can graft a bat on the hands and an ability to connect with the ball he may develop a boy who will be a great comfort to his parents In these days, when a first-ejass ,300-per-cent hitter can pull down about aa much as four or five col lege presidents. If the ' roving, runaway dlsnosttlon can only be directed In the right path which lead around the diamond and always comes back to 'home' on the run, he will accomplish much. "But the popular Impression Is that Mr Burbank will try to graft cleanliness on face and hands, a surveyed part to the hair, translucent ears, squirrel teeth, a spotless white collar around the neck and a generally lamblike deportment. No boy can be a lamb without risking grow ing up a muttonhead or the mark for speculators. "Boy aren't vegetables, although some grow up like weeds. Boy can't ba trained up a trelli. but who knows if they can't be cultivated up the ladder to success? Several of our most prominent men were once boys though few would suspect it. ! As Burns said, 'For a' that, and a' that. a boy s a boy for a- that.' or worus iu that effect." "Suppose the boy doesn't want to be Im proved?" asked Friend Wife. "Oh,- the kid has to be the goat," re plied the Tired Business Man. (Copyright, mil, by the N. V. Herald Co.) I Troubles of the Pocket Vemises i i Kvery man -who whs ever In love has referred to the object of hi devotion at some time r another a the "little girl." l-i fact, one of the surest sign of love In the first degree Is to hear a thin, frail wisp oi a man with a chest as flat aa a board. s!ebtt"f a' pliTinp MO-pound damsel aa "the little woman." His case Is hopeless when he gets that far along. Never, however, hm you value your good standing with any little woman of your acquaintance, refer to her as a "doll" or a "pocket Venus." That Is the unforglveable sin. In the opinion of a writer In the St. Louis Republic, and tor it you will have to aweat blood and writhe In agony before you Can sue for paidon. ' The little woman would like to be the leader of the suffragette parade and oarry the banners when the cloak workers go out on strike. She had rather be the leader than the led, In spite of her lack of size and 1. role proportions. She longs to be captain of forlorn hopes and a leader that can and w 111 overcome all obstaolea, but when she take a look at her little aelf In a tall mir ror she Is amazed, angered, peevish and Vs'together disagreeable and self-confld- "I ant constantly reminded of my tiny size." 1 the wall of the little woman. "People look around at me when I pass them on the street and I know they are looking at me because I am under the aver age height of women. If I get In a street car I cannot get out If It I crowded unless someone will force a way through for m. 1 da not like to tug at people's coat tails an better than anyone else, but I have to rto something to attract their attention V md It Is that or stick a hatpin In them. -1'iiey usually carry me a couple of blocks pest my destination on a crowded car, as It take me a long time to fight my way out through an aisle full of big. bulky humanity with their arms full of bundles 'I can't get on a car without feeling that I am climbing tip on a high platform, and I feel that I am risking life and. limb every time I ste off. Thera Is no fun. In being tiny and cut and petite. I had rather be an Amaronlan lady with shoulders three feet wide and arms like - a blacksmith's, than to be trampled In a car aisle Just be cause I am so little and 'cute' that I can not fight my way out of th mess and get off." "No one takes me seriously," walls an other little lady who Is a scant' five feet and Is greatly admired by everyone In her sot because of her "euteneaa. ' "They won't take me seriously when I am serious, and when I get angry they laugh at me unless I get fearfully angry. Seems to me that people ought to be able to tell when you were displeased, even If you do not happen to be six feet high and wear No. shoes. People laugh at m no matter how much In earnest I happen to be, and I know they do it because I am not big enough to look right squarely In their eyea and ahow them that I am in real earnest. What can you accomplish when you have to look at a point nearly a foot above the level of your eye when you are making a really telling argument?" The girl w ho happena to be lea than five feet In height has all these thing to bear. She has not the consoling good Mature of the fat- man or the fat woman who have philosophically decided to make the best of the situation. The little girl knows that she will never grow any more, and yet she never gets accustomed, to herself., . if " Wise Workers Will Marry Servants" "1 sometimes feel I would rather bury than marry girl who cannot cook." Thla Is the )plnlon publicly expressed by a Nonconformist minister with nearly forty ra' experience of London parochial w.rk. r'pesklng at lllgltgate, Uev. William t'uff of MiorediU h tabennacle mentioned that girl of 14 and 15 left school and entered the office and factory rather than take up doinestlo service. "They obtain," he said, "no knowledge of how to cook, or, do household work. "Eventually they come before me to be married, and I sometimes feel I would rather bury them than marry them." IMscusstng his utterance with the London I 'ally Mlrron, Mr. Cuff said that he did not blame girls themselves, but rather the sys tem which permits them to grow up lgnor- SUGirrTffJSXffKE. CmTo C0VMKT, HI I. gT TMI Nt Wjsg EWSMI TfltMMI rfW SIM MHAU CSV TaFpe'aP 4 - r 'T"r"CrOSM MtS COM IN' WW! LAYPEAP, M0,4rf pour even wostHenw o$,'cav$ wreoEsr fr TP F0 7WAT WSGPS'S THAT - fffjK I PtP hW"0wZ kjJU tnrr (soft, nt ear wfTu vu tv ff-1 Vi iVu ffHE, AvPSoiS- Jrlf meOGj -' t A WTli 1 iwit'ceRPSEk ((sob SOB "eAPtfrcr (sra)AVLiex 111 II V t Si This is ke Day We Celebrate. April 3, 1911. i.Kwia hi'uok.ss, 122 North Twenty-second. Year. ..1900 . .1901 ..1903 Name and AuMrcas. HcIhhiI. Muriel Baumwart. 3412 Kvaos St lirutd Hill . Philip Harnett, 4914 North Twenty-fifth St Saratoga ... Kuth Hrnechat, 4154 Chicago St Saundora .. Lewis burgees, 122 North Twenty-second St ,. Central 189J May Clemens Uuel, 6410 Pin &t Heals 1902 Mabel Bryant, 2S05 South Twentieth Ave Castellar 1899 BesBla Bogus, 208 South Twenty-aeventh St Kama in 1897 Bessie B. Becker, 4101 Dodge St Saundera . . 1897 . Leavenworth 1904 .Castellar 1900 .Howard Kennedy. .1896 .Lincoln . Deals . . . .Cass . Sherman .Saratoga . Pacific . . Saratoga . Central . . Castellar . Lothrop .1900 .1905 .1899 .1895 .1903 .1899 .1897 .1900 .1903 .1898 Uuth A. Chatfleld. 825 South Twentieth St... Don Chrlsman, 2509 South Twentieth St Carrie M. De Vol, 3204 Maple St Minnie Domet, 124 South Twelfth St Irene M. Dyer, 6304-Walnut St Etta Davis, 1514 Cuming St Walter Graham. 1204 Gust St Lawrence E. Gies, 2119 Grand Ave Eacto Greco, 1012 South Thirteenth St Balph Huffestetter, 4620 North Twenty-first St Miriam Hult, 511 North Nineteenth St Lynns Howard, 1914 South Eighteenth St Kose Hansen, 1414 Plnkney St Mark Havens, 2138 South Thirty-third St High ...189$ Lily Hansen, 1414 Plnkney St Lothrop 1898 I'm ma Haueisen, 2315 Boulevard Vinton 1895 Leole J. Harris, 615 South Twenty-second St High : 189 Marlon G. Johnson, 614 N. Sixteenth St, Denver Hotel. Cass 1902 Harry James, 2901 Farnam St . Farnam .........1898 Howard W. Kane, 1832 North Tweutieth St Kellom 1903 Marie Kounovsky, 3101 South Thirtieth St Windsor ... 1900 Denis J. Llnehan, 2414 North-Seventeenth St Lake 1897 Harry Mendelson, 1420 North Twentieth St Kellom 1900 Ines Maurer, 2809 Bristol St Lothrop ......... 1903 Mildred Matteson, 112 North Twenty-third St ...... Kellom 1902 Waid M. Meek, 823 Pierce St Pacific 1897 Delia Murry. 4424 Jones St .Columbian ..... ..1894 Hannah McCarthy, 1714 South Eighteenth St Comenlus ; 1895 Grace Murphy, 1020 South Twenty-third St Mason 1901 Dollle Murray, 6116 Pierce St.... Beals 1903 Arthur Martin, 3420 Taylor St Monmouth Park ..1897 Minnie Olson, 1218 South Twenty-seventh St Mason Geraldine Olson, 320 North Thirty-third St Farnam Henry Payne, 3206 South Twenty-third St ..Vinton Bachelor on the Claim J f A Sorrowful Sermon J I knew it, and always said chignon. She also had a "'severe look on ant of the elementary principles of woman's true work. "The smattering of domestic knowledge which they are taught at school," he said, Ms perfectly valueless 1n aeter life. "It should be compulsory for girls to un dergo a six months' course of housewifery when they pass out of school. "No girl should he allowed to rasa from Older the national educational authority until she can peel a potato, wash a cab bage and cook well enough to appeal to a bur.gry and tired man's ralate. "How to fry not to shrivel up a rasher of bacon, and how to make two tenement rooms comfortable are other things she should learn. , "The woman is made between the ages of It and H'i. Thirty-nine years' experi ence in parochial work in Ixndon has taught me that. "At 14 a girl begins to take a pride and interest In household things. If sheNJs taken In hand properly then she will never oiKet what Is shown and taught. "But tinder present conditions thousands . of girls get married every year without the least knowledge ff domestic economy that every wife should have. They can't even cook a piece pf fish and they doa't know how to make a home tidy and com fortable. And untidy and uncomfortable homes send men out to public houses, and lead to half the separations and divorces which take place. "Just as a good dinner makes a good hus band, ao does a comfortable horn keep him 'safe' and contented. "AndHt la because she haa generally ob tained experience of these truths and had a chance to appreciate them that a do mestic servant makes th best wife for a poor man. "He is a w ise Worker w ho marries a ser vant " Dear J so. Just as soon as women wanted to vote, then It would only be a little while until they wanted to . wear the trousers. Of course, we've. alwaya heard of some who did anyway, but only one man, or a few boys, had to deal with them. Now we'll be put to It to keep up w-ltb th trimming on pants that will be Introduced by the great clothe makers. You watch and see If I'm not right. When wi aw those Bee pictures of the pantaloon aklrt out here on tb prairies, well you could have knocked a lot of th oH fellow over with a feather. Of course, I wasn't In that class, and having seen the women riding cowboy fashion I waan't hocked at this Constantinople stunt. I Just wondered how they get them on. We can't figure they are pulled on over the head, and yet they look a little odd com pared to overalls. I suppose th wearers sit dowa and pull them on Ilk boots, but do they have to get a bootjack to draw them off? If they fit tight underneath, metbe so. A good many years ago I went to see tr. Mary Walker Just like I went to the cir cus parade. Once a frlend--rf mine went from Tarklo to Treblxonde and other places where harems are real institutions, and when he came horns he had us all going dippy by his stories of nifty trousers worn by the women; but he said they kept their faces covered and seemed a little shy. I didn't see any veils oS the Omaha trousered wt men, and It would surely be a shame If they had to wear those blanket face cov erings w see ia pictures from Turkey. Talking of Dr. Mary Walker, she went the whole way through when I saw her, and looked like a statesman wearing a her face, but If all women who wear them get that way,, then It 1 ever get married I'll insist on a contract that only men's trousers will hsng on the hooks In our house. But I will admit the new things ought to be very convenient tor girls If they smoke, like I notice some do In the big cities. Haven't got th fur farm started yet, but am trying out snake oil for rheumatism next winter, and have started a bunch of fin frogs In a slough. I saw these frogs going to waate, and on day Figured It out that frog leg ought to taste Just as good out her aa they did when they 'soaked a fellow a day's wages for a few on toast. I am feeding my frogs on cornmeal and wild tic, and If good luck sticks by me reckon to have many a feast and have some to ship, maybe to Omaha. There Is plenty of room for frogs to get exercise out here, although mine are a little sleepy yet, but the sun Is getting warmer all the time and I'm trying to train ff for th summer's work by digging up a garden patch and wearing out a brick on a rusty plow. Ash Creek IJn. ' ISAAC. A food Inspector la Manchester, N. H., found one lot of beef and pork In a butcher hop that was rather questionable. He called In the owner of th place. "Look here," he said, "what la your opinion of this meat?" Th butcher looked It over "I had for gotten all about that," lie said. "It Is pretty old stork." "Well, what la your opinion of it?" "My opinion," said the butcher slowly, "J that it Is unfit for human food; but It might do for sausage." Metropolitan. I have heard of poor and sad congrega tions, but th saddest preacher I ever knew went from Posey county, Indiana, to Pike county, Missouri, (where John Hay dis covered Little Breeches and Jim Bludsoe). Ho was starving to death on donations of catfish, 'possum and a $100 salary. Finally he made up hla mind to go away. With wet eyes, be stood up in the prayer meeting to bid good-bye to his weeping congregation. 'Brother and sisters," hs said, wiping his eyes on hla red bandanna handkerchief, "I've railed you together tonight to say farewell. Th Ixird haa called me to an other place. I don't think the Lord love thl people much; for none of you seem to din. He doesn't seem to went you. And you don't eeem to lov each other; for I'v never married any of you. And I don't thing you love me; for you don't pay m my salary and your donations are mouldy fruits and wormy apples. 'By their fruits ye shall know them." "And now. bothers and sisters, I am go ing to a better place. I've been appointed chaplain to th penitentiary at JollaU. 'Where I go ye cannot come; but I go to prepare a place for you.' "From Heart' Throb. Spider Kat Mosae. Spider poise prodigious appet'tes. A scientist who carefully noted a spider's consumption of food in twenty-four hour concluded that If the spider were a large a a full-grown man and hla appetite In creased In proportion to hi six, he would eat at daybreak a small alligator, by T a. in a lamb, by a. m. a coif, by 1 o'clock i sheep, and would finish up with a hug meat pie. The Little Bee Want Ad. la a Booster. I Loretta's Looking Glass-Holds it Up to the Rainbow Chaser Laura Pates, -1610 Frederick St. .'.'.. . '.Castellar' Hugh Rlggs, 1817 Capitol Ave Clifton Hill Clifton Searle, 1625 Park Ave .High Raymond E. Stroud, 2633 North Fourteenth St Lake 1903 Lillian Simpson, 2509 Bristol St , Lothrop 1904 . . .1902 . ..1903 . ..1901 .V.1902 ..'190t . ..1891 Kudolf Slogr, 1262 South Fourteenth St.... Comenlus Albert L. Schuhl, 1406 North Thirty-third St Franklin Albert Starkey, 3030 South Eighteenth St Vinton ....... Mary Schmttz, 1611 Castellar St St. Jose .h Esther M. Tlmmell, Thirty-fourth St. and Fowlar Ave. Monmouth Park Gertrude E. Telleson, 4416 North Thirty-eighth St.. Monmouth Park Rudolph Vankat, 3003 Frederick St Windsor Nell VaMely, 2608 Franklin St Ixng - Miriam Wesner, 3212 Lincoln Boulevard Franklin'. Aaron Weltz, 2306 North Twenty-first J?t Lake , . Annia E. Wachtler, 2313 Vinton St. ... St. Joseph ..1901 . .1897 ..1898 . .1903 . .1904 . .1899 ..1902 . .1904 . .1903 ,.1906 . .1904 Mrs. Harris Says Women Spoil Husbands 'Why-dots. hrryjfc o do He wanted to compliment Mabel, but Instead of calling her a vL4oo..tolJ her hc was a 'sight'- "Hay, doctor," Inquired a man who was flrhlng for free medical service, "what do you think makes me so hald? "M m!" rejol led' the doctor. "I ascribe It tf the fact that your hair comes out!" The Key to th bltuaUon Bee Waal Ada. I have aa interesting letter from- a girl atop your rainbow chasing. Nobody ever who tell m she Is "NOT a beau-stealer.' Very well; but you ARE a rainbow chaser. "How about the girl who does not steal beaux?" ah write, "who looks higher than th fickle Move,' who endeavors to use her mind with which nature has en dowed her to the beat of her ability, who goea seeking with her lantern through life for a single man who knows more than she, whose soul Is more Intense, to whom she may look up and find support? But she haa not found him yet. All la hollow. Knowledge Is found only In tho old." Tou are not using your mind to th beat of your ability. You dream a world like you would have It and set up a standard for a lover to reach. It'a a way girls have. I know. I did I still do It myself, But I have paid. And you will pay If you do not deliberately caught up with th gay golden promise. Its Ml'CH hard running! And It is HO useless! And for all tb glainer In the dlstanc you never will get past th thorns of disappointment and th shadows and Uaelineea bung aa thick aa the tuoes fes toons In southern forests. There are no men you can lean on all th time! Any man's arm will "go to sleep" or his legs get a cramp If he Is used a a constant support. Tou must do som of it. Tou have your kind ot support to give; and you must not be bunting for someone toward whom you expect to act th undignified role of sponge. And let me tell you something about these "old and knowledge-filled men " The reason you like them la because they know they must win youth by deferring It. Ho wake up to sea thins aa they til aadJ the talk about the things TOU know. Hut do not make the mistake of thinking that a man knows leas than you because he does not know the HAMB TH1NQ8. lie may know a great deal of which you are Ignorant. Put th "tatenmty of your soul' on a diet. Nothing Is so deforming to th char acter If not reduoed. And do not hunt an other "Intense soul" or a more Intense one. Tou would fight Ilk cat and dog. Marry a hardware merchant whose dumb soul crave an Inspiration, tf that to him. Body play Its part In love. You are wrong in trying to make It "of tb mind" alone. It' a good, big, splendid part If you acknowledge It claim and control It desires. Body 1 love' steam and brain Ita regulator. Stop chasing rainbows and see life and lov and men as they are. Tbejr are nons of them even half bad. "There are just aa many private divorces as there are public ones. The public di vorce occur among th degraded rich and the degraded poor both the waste mstert- ala of society but th private divorces are not confined to any clasa or classes." This Is the opinion ef Mrs. Corra Harris, the author. In the New York World. "Marriage Is an undeveloped, primitive state at present." continued Mrs. Harris, "for the major! t of men and women who go Into It do not seem to know how to make th best of each other. Th women apeolally seem to manage to make tho very worst of their husbands. Th women, beat educated and best trained and best suited to wifehood and motherhood, are re fusing to marry, or, being married, they are refusing to remain ao." Bpeaklng of the remedy for th growing divorce evil, Mr. Harris declared that women should "pay mora attention to the Jrnidea and less to th outside of their little BallJes ar.S FV.nnlea. Oirl are too well dressed and loo poorly trained. "Mothers, as a rule, have too little moral Influence over their sons," she said. "What they want Is to study their own little Jim mies and Johnnies nvire, even If they have to take some of the time from the study of political economy and parliamentary law." Twenty year a&o Mrs. Harris waa the wife of a circuit rider of the Methodist church In Georgia. When her story, "Th Circuit Rider's Wife," appeared last year as a serial It brought much criticism from conservatives of th church. At that time Mr. Harris, who was said to be th hero In the story, occupied a high official posi tion on the Board of Education of that church. Just about the Urn th story ap peared last fall In book form Mr. Harris committed suicide. When asked for bar opinion on th reason for th increase in divorces Mr Harrl said: "There are several reasons for It, I think. One Is due to the awakening of women to the sens of Justice In regard to their condition and relation to the order of things, as shown In modern life. Justice baa become to them a personal matter, not a sentimentality. They havs not only taken the matter up, but they hav takes' It to th courts. "Another reason Is ths false staadards of education for woman. These standards tend to draw them out of the home instead of Inte It. Tb whole system of education for women In thl country I wrong, for It tend to develop them Ilk men Instead of Ilk women. It I Inexplicable to me that learned .men, who would resent instantly th tefhlnlnlalng of the education ot men, do not See th danger of masculinising th education of women. "If training tended to make women more womanly and men mora manly a better claaa of children would b born." ".What quality la women U calculated to it J hold man' affection longest, do you think?" "fndoubtedly, charm. Hhe may remain faithful, virtuous and Industrious In short, she may hsv all the qualities ot Solomon' famous women; but it she drop th cor ners of her mouth or loses the sweet, heau catchlng beam out of her eyes she may a well glv up the ghost so far aa he I con cerned. She cannot hold him. lie may re main faithful to hi marriage vow, but not to her." f Called the Bluff ' J "The Marquis de Vlllabar," aald a Wash ington diplomat, "la trying to put young King Manuel back on the throne. He 1 going around collecting. But he ha a good deal of trouble to get th Portuguese nobility to shell out. , "The nobility profess the most devoted loyalty, but, when It comes to cash Th diplomat smiled. "The Marquis d Vlllabar," he said, "asked a Portuguese count for a subscrip tion th other day In Ixndon. The count drew himself up and answered haughtily: " 'My blood Is always at the service of his majesty.' " 'Yes, I know.' said de Vlllabar, net tled, 'but, you see, we don't want to start a sausage factory.' " ALL W-THB FAMILY X F ' -"el il.ll' ."- 7J .. Her ear knocked a man down yesterday, tut ahe didn't hav pay damagea." How waa th4r