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"PoPallAR PAPER oPA?PCRN -TIMES "
Voi. 6 No 32
Lincoln, N'umkaska, Saturday, July 18, laoi.
F'KICIC IIVIC Oicnth
.SSaSS n- SS"
Tlii'ii) ought to bo a law prohibiting tlio
cuinnts of a Pullman lceicr from ettlnn
up before kix o'clock in the morning, It liap
peited to lie my luck tlu other tiny to strik j
a car with it party of muti going for an out
ing. They got up nt four oolock the next
morning. They made remarks to each other
nml took tlu wholo car Into confidence.
Some of the remarks wore supposed to lie
funny ami of courso the seakir's smnrttieHs
linil to Imj recognized with a round of approv
ing laughter. Politeness demanded at least
tliat inucli from tlio other members of tlio
party, and It did not matter that twenty
other persons were disturbed and annoyed.
Thny were tint In sight and there Is no law of
courtesy that requires 6ihj to lw polite to a
person not visible. This outing party was
composed of middlo-ngcd business men and
their conduct wbh a ioor comeutary on tho
restraining Influences of socloty. Now that
we oro In the lino swing of reform, It w to lw
hojiod that tho next legislature will regulate
this little matter. Kvery man Is entitled to
have the world reformed to suit himself and
I maintain my right to as many rights as
The national editorial convention met nt
8t. Paul this week. It was n remarkable
gathering and not the least remarkable thing
about it was. the attention showered upon the
quill pushers. Chicago was a meeting point
for tho editors of the east ami tho Chicago
and Northwestern rallwuy took them to Ht.
Paul In a special train of ten magnificent
Pullman coaches. A southern group gather
ed at Ht, Louis and the great Burlington
route accorded its friends of the press simi
lar handsome treatment in the matter of
special treatment. This is but n sample of
numerous courtesies. The association has a
membership of 10,00(1 editors, but the con
vention Is composed of about 600 delegates.
Among Nebraska's delegates were tho editors
of the Call and of the Couhikh. This meet
ing Is not a mere picnic. For three ilays tho
editors discuss questions of importance to
the fraternity and tho brightest men from
all parts of tho country contribute to this
fund of information and experience. Many
of tho delegates will take excursions arrang
ed for them to tho Yellowstone park and to
the Pacific slope.
The summer resort business is in a bud
way so far this season. Tho manager of a
big summer hotel told mo tho other day thnt
he was from three to four thousand In the
hole thus far this season. Tho weather had
been so cold and ilampthat eople would not
lenvo homo and there was almost no business
until last Saturday. We hear of the big
profits made by tho mangers of summer ho-tels-when
they make them but we seldom
hear of the losses. Tho house referred to
nbovo had been running three weeks nt an
expense probably of two hundred dollars u
day, and its guests had ranged from ten to
forty only. That sort of thing is not a Rtuto
of airalrs to be happy over cr to boast of,
hence wo do not beur of tho misfortunes of
the business as much as of the successes.
Speaking of summer hotels, I saw a sum
mer cottage the other day that hud u num
ber of unique features. The most striking
tiling about it was tho fact that straw mut
was used for wall paper or for plaster, If you
please. Instead of plaster and pajier on the
walla and ceilings the frame work was cover
ed with matting in a pretty red and white
checkered design. It looked cool and lent
color to the rooms and had tho ineiit of nov
elty, and I presume, of cheapness. Through
the center of this cottage was it big, wide,
hall, as Jargo as a young dancing hall, and as
there were four society girls in the family
you may lie sure that it filled that purpose.
The floor was thickly strewed with rugs,
which of course could be removed with
trifling trouble. At either end of the hall
were doors, making u cooling draft blow
through. The stairs to tho second story rose
from the renr of the hall, at one side, uud tho
walk nt the head of the stairs made n balcony
overlooking the hall. It was not an clitbor
nte house, but Its owner, an able lawyer, had
evidently planned it for comfort und to suit
his family, lieing u thinking man ho put
originality into It without great expense.
An article in an exchange gives an Inter
view with a shoe dealer in which he exalts
his trade after tho manner of men and ends
with tho declaration that u person neatly
shod will always appear well dressed,
implying that tho remainder of his wearing
apparel is of little concern. This may all bo
true, but haven't you road a somewhat simi
lar Interview In which u a Imtter maintain
ed that a stylish bat was about all n man
needed to look welll Haven't you seen simi
lar claims set up for collars, for shirts, for
skirts, for trousers, for cuffs, for neckwear J
Isn't it about time for these gentlemen to bo
a bit more modest in lioastlug their proton
hlousf Or is It the enterprising interviewer
who crowns their several stories with tho su
preme excellence or arrogance! At any rate
that sort of thing Is getting to lio very chest
nutty mid It ought to bo culled In.
Total abstinence is making progress. The
proof of It comes In peculiar form. In some
of tho largo cities tho givers of dinners have
become so sensitive to public sentiment on
this matter that they tire omitting wine from
their tables, uud It is seriously projiosed to
nccompnny Invitations to wlneless dinners
with a mall Ihjw of blue ribtion securely
fastened to tho card. When a total abstainer
leceivesonoofthesoho will know that ho
mt.y accept tho invitation without danger of
hnving his self respect damaged by the looks
of ungodly wlne-bibbers. On tho other hand
gentlemen who tiro iossessed of convivial
temperaments and habits will have a tip und
may trump a plausible excuse for sending
regrets, By nil means lot us have the blue
ribbon nuil sort out tho sheep and tlio goals.
The uhsorption of ten cent pieces by those
aggravating dime saving banks goes on at
an astonishing rate, and the tiling lias lie
hveome a sot t of fad with some people. I
have heard of one lady who has laid by ten
of them, all loaded to the nozzle, making
about llfty dollars she has stored away in
tills manner. Hhe really shows symptoms of
a monomania on the subject, audit Is quite
possible the voracious little cylinders me
cultivating miserly tendencies in a great
many people. At any rate the drum on the
circulating medium lias been so great that
tho great government has felt It. Hereto
fore the Philadelphia mint was the only one
that coined dimes, but the demand for the
llttlo shiners has become so great that tlio
New Orleans mint has been ordered to turn
out n lot of them. This affords u good ex
ample of how far reaching may be a matter
of apparently trilling Importance. Avarice
becomes a passion rnthur than a passing fad,
uud It may bo that the dimo bank has come
to stny, but it Is safe to predict another nov
elty ere many months, that will crowd It In
to second placo In tho publlo eye; but what
u people wo nro for novelties, mere trinkets
designed to entlco the dimes and quartei s
from our pockets and how thoy do sweep the
whole country In their marchl
What Is there about life in tents thut
makes jieoplo sociable and tolerant I You
may taken erson who Is severely diguilled
mid distant In a civilized community, throw
him among a lot of campers and In u few
days he will become a pleasant, ompiiiiiouii
ble animal of tho genus homo. The fellow
who can resist tho genial influence of camp
life is n sorry dog indeed, uud he hasn't a
very good license to tho companionship of
human beings. Hut what Is this insidious
power Is it because life In the open, brings
ull jHtrtlos down to u common level! It is
human naturo for us to crave respect, defer
ence, envy and adulation . In town these
depend greatly on u man's bank account, on
his business or iolltIcal affairs, on his oxclu
slveness, on his affectation of style and of
snporioiity. In a tent among the woods
overy man is thrown on his merits ns an in
dividual. The evidences of wealth and urro
ganeohuveto bo left at home. Freed of
these trappings and the petty distinctions of
society, a man returns to u state of nature
uud depends on personal qualities to win tlio
good will of his fellows. The aristocratic
mediocrity finds the penniless Hohcmiau is
the bright, popular follow of the crowd and
the genial influence stirs his soul to emula
tion. At least that was about tho conclusion
u party of us reached as b result of discuss
ing personal oxHrieuces.
Hutu most noticeable thing about this
summer outing business Is the wuy in which
women thaw out at these lesorts. They
make acquaintance i with Tom, Dick und
Harry in the most unconventional of ways,
and lllrtund rump in u rather riotous man
ner. At houiu they affect such a pink of
propriety that u most desirable acquain
tance muy wilt months for an oportuiio
Inception according to Ironclad Tonus. It
all looks so inconsistent, und for my part I
do not understand how lovely woman quiets
Homo time ago a Nebruska City tudy decld
eil to glvo a large reception und ordered In
set Ibed upon her invitations tho letters "It.
H. V. P.," still uufuuilliur to tiiuuy In the
place. Her husband, an enterprising cloth
ing merchant, picked up one of the dainty
missives before they were ready for delivery,
examined it critically, gave au exclamation
of satisfaction and with a diabolical grin nit
on his visage left tho house. But Imagine
that woman's feelings when, upon the very
day liefore her grand affair, she oo'ied tlio
local paper to read this familiar advertise
ment: J. B. BLANK & CO, Clothiers,
To their customers every day from
7 A. M. to 0 P. M.
It. S. V. P.
Heady made Huits, Vests and Punts
But this explanation of the cabalistic let
ters was not the only ones those luckless In
vitations encountered. One lady stepped In
to a neighbor's with un offeded till- uud
asked: Are you going to Mrs- Hliu.k's recep
tion to-morrowf" "1 expect to." replied her
friend. "Well, I think this matter of taking
presents Is going to fur. It's hud enough for
weddings and unnlvoisarles, but If It's got to
iw introduced Into purtles I, for one, shall
set my feet down, and whatever they say, I
will not iend over $6 for this thing tomor
row that's Hat I" Her friend looked at her
dazedly. "What do you meuiif" sho cried.
"I've hoard nothing nbout presents." "You
huveu'tf Well, Just look nt your invitation
tho mobt Impudent thing. H. H. V. P.
return some valuable present. Now what do
you think of that for cheek f" Another ask
ed asked a friend If sho was going early, add
ing: "You'd bettor" "Whyf "Didn't
you notice those letters f That means, re
freshments Served very promptly, uud I tell
you I menu to bo there on time."
A fuiinv storv Is enlm the rounds nt tltu
press of ai Omaha young lady who fou ml a
iiurse-suo, ami wishing ror good luck placed
it under lier pillow with her false teeth! In
the morning in the hurry of dressing she sub
stituted tho shoe for tho teeth and wore It
sometime before the mistake was discovered,
Abraham Llucoln must, by future genera
tlous which read the story of his life not yet
altogether made, be regarded us one of the
most unique churticters in history, says tho
Now York Herald. Even to those who by
force of circumstances were most In his com
pany be was over developing a new side.
Grim, revengeful Htanton, his war secretary,
never quite knew how to take him. Stanton
was for exterminating such elements ns dar
ed to usk questions. It is related that once
homo one hud refused to understand an or-
der, or at nil events, had not obeyed. "1 be
lieve I'll sit down," said Htanton, "and give
that man a piece of my mind." "Do so,"
said Lincoln, "write him now, while you
have It on your mind. Make it sharp; cut
him all up." Htanton did not need a second
Invitation It wus a bone-cruncher that ho
read to the president, "That'll right," mild
Abe, "that's u good one." "Whom can I
got to send it by I" mused tho secietarv.
"Send ttl" loplfed Lincoln; "send It! Why
don't semi It at all Tear It up. You novr
want to send such letters; I never do. "
What It lines.
1. Purilles tho blood.
'-'. Creates un appetite
'I. Htrongthoiis thonetves.
4. Makes tho weak strong.
6. Overcomes that tired feeling,
tl. Cures scrofula, salt rheum, eto.
7. Invigorates tho kidneys nml liver.
H. Hollows headache, Indigestion, dyscp-sla.
Dr. C. F. L'idd, dentist, 1106 O street.
Telephone 163. OMIco hours tin, in. to op. in.
Flannel shirts denned without shrinking by
the French dry cleaning process, only 1ft els.
nt Lincoln Htenm Dye works, 1106 O street.
Colmcctionh In and out of the city at
tended to, Hents collected, Houses leased and
Estates managed. II. N. Wossol, Notary
Public, room ) Ittn olock, llth and N sts.
Bicycles of nil kinds und all makes skill
fully repaired on short notice. Wrenches,
oil cans, tires and other supplies always ror
sale at Oeorgo & Fishetto, 144'J O street.
Now is the time to provide yourself und
family with u reliable remedy for IhiwoI
complaints. It is almost certain to be need
ed, uud no family can afford to be without
it. It costs but ii trltlo and miy be the
menus or saving much suffering, If not life.
There are many different remedies in use,
but Chamberlain's Colic, Cholera and Diar
rhoea Hemedy Is undoubtedly the best. 'Si
and 60 cent bottles for sale by Chas. C. Heed,
Call on Henry Harpham, 14'J north Elev
enth street, opjiosito Capital Hotel for lly
nets, summer lap robes and carriage whips.
Be hliru llllll trv rll4i.ru tl'vnmlinr Vut
coal. Best in the market, price 4.40 deliv
ered by Geo. A. Haymer. Telephone iWU,
jiu-f j nireei.
Our work euks for Itself. It needs no
brag or bluster, simply your own opinion
will testify to ts merits. The Htlldio Le
Grnndo is on the ground Door, centrally lo
eitUd and a beautiful place. Call and see us
at l'-N south Twelfth street.
Jillck nml Comfortable Trip,
Two new trains nave lieeii added to the al
ready excellent connections east that th
i Grent Hock Island Houte has been offering
to its patrons.
The Lake Shore & Mich. Southern has put
on u new- train, leaving Chicago daily at 10:
ISO a. m., and the Fort Wayne (Pennsylvania
Lines), one at 10:46 a. in.
These are dullv trains, schedule,! on fust.
' time, ami nrrlve nt New York City next af
I teruoou at - o'clock, and via the first inon
j t (uned Boston passengers reach their destlna
tluii tmt J hours later.
The Hock Island Houte Sleeper loaves
Omaha dally at 4:!0 p. in., and arrives at
Chicago ut 8:06 a.m., In time to make tills
important through connection.
For rates nml tickets npply to
J. L. Dk Bkvoih, Gen'l Agent Puss. Dept.,
Kith & Furuiim Sis,, Omaha.
J No. Hkiiastian, Gen'l Tkt. & Pus. Agt.
E. St. John, Gen'l .Manager.
Stc our beautiful Individual ice cream
moulds before ordeiiug elsewhere. "Tho
Finest" ISJ0 O street.
Are Yon Interested!
The following frank statement Irom J K.
Hure of Trenton, Texas, will be of interest to
many of our citizens. "My little boy wm
very bad off for two months with diarrluea.
We used various medicines, nisi filled in
two doctors, but nothing done him tiny good
until we used Chamberlain's Colic, Cholera
and Dlarrlui'i Hemedy, which gave Imme
diate relief uud soon cured him, I conslder
it tlio best medicine made uud can ooii'cien
tioiisly recommend ft to nil who need u diar
rlupii or colic medicine. For sale by Chas.
C. Heed, Druggist.
Henry Harpham, soils good harness for
good money, also poor harness for good
The Whltebreast Coal and Lime company
Is nlwtiys at the front supplying the finest
grades of all kinds of coal
Kyu nml Kur Surgeon.
Dr. W. L. Dayton, oculist and aurist, liSM
O street, telephone 1176, Lincoln, Nebr.
Never order a photograph or picture of
any kind until you have seen the work done
at the new Studio Le Grande, 121 south
Hea llatlilui; l,lt)0 Miles from t lie Sea, at
The famous health resort, Garfield Beach,
on Great Salt I.ake, eighteen miles from
Salt Lake City, Is reached via the Union
Pacific, "Tho Overland Houte," and is now
This is the only real sand beach on Great
Salt Iako, and Is one of the lliust bathing
uud pleasure resorts in the West.
For complete description of Gnrfleld Beach
and Grent Salt Lake, send to K. L. Loitiax,
Gen'l Pass., and Ticket Agent, Oninlta, for
copies of "Sights and Scenes In Utah," or
"A Glimpse of Great Salt Ijike," or apply at
1011 0 street. E. B. Slossou, City Ticket
a slight Ennon.
If He Had Only Kept Unlet It Wnnlit
Have lleen All UlubU
"Do you see that foreign looking follow
In tho seat opposite usr'' nsked a comfort
nblu looking inun In tho smoking ear of a
Michigan Central train tho other day.
"Yes," replied his sent mute "What
"Tlint'd what Pin going to tell you all
"Do yon know hlinf"
"Never hiiw him before, but I've always
mndu It n practice to milieu people wlion I
trnvel, und seculiito as to who they nro,
what they are, where they've lieeii, und nil
that. Ily George, I can slr.o n man up In
great shape. You notice that fellow's
grizzled beard uud rntlu'i-refined features V
"You see that ho Is entirely occupied
with thu periodical lie has In his hands
doesn't notice anything going on In the
'SeoinB to bo looking nt thu pictures."
'Exactly You notice what tho publl.
cation Is. Can you read tho tltlo from
"An art magazine, Isn't tit"
"Yes. Now, you sou that big flat parcel
tnndlug on the sent beside hiitif"
"I sco; looks llko n big atlas."
"It Isn't. You notice tho mnn'a careless
dress, his stained hands, his dilapidated
"And you have no Idea yet what he is!"
"Can't nay I have. Ho doesn't nppear to
bo an ordinary traveler exactly."
"He's an artist. A typical nrtlst oor
but industrious. Ho lives up In tho state
somewhere, und he's been to thu city to get
a canvas for u now picture That's It on
tho seat that Mat parcel, lie's bought a
copy of the magazine and he's engrossed
In tho atiiily of It. Now, Just for fun, I'm
going to prove tho correctness of my diag
nosis." Ho loaned over und touched thu sleeve
of tho mini opposite.
"Er uxcuso mo, sir," he said, "but your
face seems very familiar. I've boon trying
to place you."
The man looked ut him wotidorlitgly, us
though ho did not understand.
"If I'm tiot mistaken," continued the
questioner, "you arc tin nrtlst. Don't you
live up in thu Interior of the state some
where! I forgot uxactly where I've seen
Tho man raised his eyebrows slightly.
"Llvo lu Detroit," ho said.
"Well, you are uu artist a painter!" Ha
pointed to tho flat parcel.
The other man looked serious. He pulled
the paper away from the edge of the parcel
and disclosed a dozen lights af glass.
"Glass-n-put-ln imiu," ho said, pointing
to himself. Mo-fi-put in a glass go to
Just then the train boy came along gath
ering up his literature, uud ils ho took away
the art publication which tlio Italian had
licen lingering the comfortable looking
mnn with u bullied smile shifted himself
back iuto his own sent, remarking as lie
''If I'd let the muti alone It would have
been all right." Detroit Free Press
Couldn't Cutch Ulin.
Melssonier, like many other celebrities,
hod a passion for gardening, His gardener,
un accomplished botanist, knew to per
fection tho seeds of overy plant, nml Mels
sonlor had often tried In vulu to throw him
off his guard
"This tliuo I've got him," the nrtlst re
marked to a party of friends ut tho dinner
tablo, and he showed them u small packet
containing thu dried roe of ti herring, lis
then sent for the gardener
"Do you know this seed?" Molssonlor In
quired. Tho gardener carefully scrutinized the
grains. "Why noO" ho said, at lust.
"Thoy tiro tho seeds of the tolpiis lluscl
mus, a very rare tropical plunt."
"How long will thoy lw In coming up!"
Melssonier asked, with a chuckle of suit
"About u fortnight," wus the reply.
Two weeks later the guests were again
assembled nt Melssoulor's tablo, und after
dinner the gardener was announced.
"XI. Melssonier," the man wild, "the seed
mis Just come up."
"Ahl you surprise mo!" the artist ex
slalmod us ho rose ami led tho way into tho
garden to examine the botanical phetiom
The gardener lifted u glass shade and
disclosed to view a small bed with three
rows of pickled herrings' heads peeping
out of the earth Everybody laughed.
Melssonier dismissed the gardener on the
8t)Ot. btlt took him on ULmln thn imrt. ilnv
The liiiiiiinlcul Mmi.
As oft us he can,
Tho married man.
Must bu suro to go to the game:
But If his iliiunhtcr
6hould ask for a quarter.
He'll tltn) her much to blame.
And his iKr wife
Must look for strife.
If sho hints at the mutlnee;
He'll stamp and swear.
And then declare,
He's no motior to fool away.
But him you'll see,
At the hour of three,
Goltik' out to suo tho game.
He has no cash
To waste, on trash.
But ho guts there just the same.
Chapter I: Weak, tired, no apietlte.
Chapter:.': Take Hood's Sursaparlllu.
Chapter 0: Strong, cheerful, hungry.
Henry Hurpliam, harness, saddlery and
turf goods, 14'J north Eleventh street, opi White
Buy con) mined near your home. .No wens
tie Nut Is conceded by all thnt hnvo used It to
bo the best for kitchen use. Price f 1. 40 de
livered. Sold only by Geo. A. Rnymer. Tel
ephone :SW,' 113IO street.
Tho Lincoln club went to Omaha last week
and to thnsurpilse of everybody murccdnl
lit winning Saturdays game. Then people
begun to think that wo hud sit nek n winning
gait again and there were coiilldnut prtslle
lions that we would lake IhiIIi of Sundays'
gaines, Hut we didn't Ever body was
surprls,sl again. First, Itimch who had Just
been roliistatisl after a couple of week's sus
pension 1 1 lisl his hand with the ball, but his
arm had lost Its cunning and we tost the
Hist game by a wore of 111 to 4. Elteljorg
was lu the box for the Omaha club and from
an Omaha standpoint he was erfootly satis
factory, Dave's pels showed unmistakable
signs of n plctunwqiio Jamboree nml some of
them grnbbisl ut bulls as though they had
'em1 Itayinond was mrtlcularly leery and
after a short trial he was put on the bench
and Stafford substituted. There were two
reasons w liy the Omaha club won, First:
they played the best ball; second: our men
had not stilllelently recovered from their
liquid Jollification; Elteljorg fanned three
men out, Hoacli one. In the second game
O'Duy relieved Iloach and Dad Clarke suc
ceeded Elteljorg. This time thef score was I
to 1 In tho other fellows' favor. It was n
toss up ns to who pitched the Itest ball; but
in un unlucky moment Lincoln got rattled
mid Omaha did the rest. Monday Kansas
City ciiiiio to Lincoln, and the Cowboys have
hud an iutoiestliig visit. Ehret olllolated the
Hist day and Darnbrough tried to show his
former In etlu en that ho could flitch. His
endeavor, however, wasn't very successful,
Ehret's win k Jttstlllul all that has Imcii said
iff him, H he didn't win the game nil by
himself he was largely responsible for Liu
coin's victory. Tho score was It tail. To
sum up the gaiuu briefly the Kansas City
club played the kind of n game that Lincoln
has been putting up lately before Davecom
inenced filling thelioys und Lincoln well
wo played hull for it change. Ensile umpired
and his wot k wus a welcome change. In the
Judgment or u greut many jieoplo ho Is the
lst umpire lu the Western association.
There was u second tussle Tuesday with a
like result. O'Day had his pitching cloth h
on and our Iwys helng sober ami In good
trim settled down and played to win uud
they won. if there had been any object in
it we might have secured twnuty-llvu runs:
but we didn't need them, so we only took
II, uud we generally let the other rellows
have I. Smith and Johnson took turns in
pitching ror the visitors.
Wednesday's game was wry luterestlng.tlie
score wus Lincoln U, Kaunas City 1. Owing
to the fact thnt tho Omaha club disbanded
this week, there was no gnmo yesterday.
Equally wife for young or old, Ayer's Hnr
saparilhi cleanses the hloud from all Impuri
ties. WllKsr Oiiant HAII), "We will light It outf
on this lino if it takes all summer," ho proba
bly refered to tho "Burlington," us every
btMiy knows it is tho only "lino" worth light
ing for in this part or the country.
(,'iialiniHii I'ark Speelnl Trains.
Until further notice. II. k M. tmlnu will
run us follows between Lincoln uud Ctlsli-
HViiirsifii l,envo Lincoln 7:!t() '-m, uud
return from Ctishmuti at 1 1 i--m.
.StihtiilniiH U-iivo Lincoln at '.JiiKi i'-ii nml
retui ii from Cmhiuan ut S i-m.
SiiiiiIiiii Iahwu Lincoln at KhilO am,
',':"0 l'-5t. :i:.'U) . llllll ftt.'lll l-.M- L.tlirnlin.
' from Ciishimiu at II a-m, :i p-m, 6 imi and (I
1 r-.M. iiiiiI S:ito I--M.
Hegular train No. 71 leaving Lincoln
at l:'J0 l' it dally except Sunday wlllalso stop
at Cushmiiii, li'Mioriug tickets, lotltid trip
rate of 16 cents will apply to all.
loiitlilleiin i:iiriiieiui I'm-,, l'reiirtliiu,
Ladles, If you want most elcunut fncetireii-
anitlon, try this one. It Is pure as spring
water; no lead, sediment or other Injurious
substances. It makes your skin soft, fresh,
and clear; removes tan, blotcln-s, discolora
tious, and ImpaiU a eaiiy complexion.
If your face is not what you desire It, try
"Youtbileuii". I guarantee It to give erfift
satisfaction. I have sought for a prepara
tion that will make complexions fresh ami
young looking and now! hnvo found It, re
tailed at two dollars or three for live. I have
secured the agency for this tiusiy article.
J. H. Haiilkv. Druggist, I turolu, NVb.
Brown's re-tuutauts, Windsor htwk, 'JIIJ
north Eleventh street, and I lib O street.
Five dollar commutation tickets reduced to
four dollars, good at lioth places.
SInglcton-I asked Miss Passe, point
blank, her age last night. Sho said she
wouiutii ion me, nut she would write it on
u sheet of paper if I'd sign my name to It.
Ueuedlct Well, what Is borage?
"I didn't llud out. The paper she pro
duced wus it marriage license." Uoston
Dasliawtty I want you to como over to
my literary society, old man.
Cleverton-AU right. Shall I wear u I
dress suit 1
Ditshaway No. Hut bring nlotig au ex
tra pack of cards. Clothlernud Furnisher.
A Lnmo Excuse.
Mother Whatl You don't mean to say
that the lieutenant has been hero all the
afternoouf Haven't I forbidden you to re
main alone In the company of gciitleiucur
Daughter Why, ma, there wus uulyouo!
She Was Thankful.
Waitress (to landlady)-Oh, ma'am, Mr.
Spit 11 re has left the tablo hi a rage.
Landlady I'm glad of thatl It's the
first thing I over knew him to leave. De
troit Free Press.
"CLUBS ARE TRUMPS."
Wiltten for iliu CoiiiiKii,
Life never stands still, it Is said, though It
makes u mighty close matter of It lu Squash
vllle, where everything Is iff such niurhlo
llke rigidity and liilloxlhln diameter that wo
gel to thinking what Is will be roroer. Hut
it new eta has ilawnid ami the smooth sur
face of tlio mai ble will Im cracked, not brolo
en, by somo mild forms of dissipation ; u row
llshing parties, a festival or two, a Woman's
Itellnf Cotpse, supiM'f, eto. Anything In tlio
shape of eating stt ikes light homo lu Hqimsh.
vllle, ns the name ludlcaliK. Whether the
corpse will effect the supper m any way, I
liavobeeii tinablo to asceitnln, I, with my
accustomed meekness, mentioned It In tlio
vlllnge nml found I had committed one of
my big bluudeis. Lot It pass. Those tiro
merely Incidents not to be noticed lu com
parison with "Froth and Foam", for In ad
dition to the above startling events, an ac
quaintance said, "l.et's have it club." We
were not nt the tlitin playing whist, uud I,
(iHilug naturally very thick headed) did not
Instantly understand, but ns soon ns lgrasp
isl It, (the Idea, iiottlieclub) I groaned, "why
not u switch, It would Imi lighter to carry,'
uud the mercury absolutely stationary at
110 In tho house; but 1 gave the sulijisit my
warmest consideration. I slept, and my last
thought wits a club; I woke and u club con
fronted my eyes; In the midst of household
duties, something swung constantly over my
head, usviidcd In mid nlr. Wus It a sword
of the Damuclcau tyief With affrighted
start I clutched tho monster. 'Twus a club.
Would It had fallen uud tieon reduced to the
lowest denomination of compound fractions.
That will happen eventually, for the raising
of a club but heralds It's fall, But anything
for ts'iiee If It takes all summer! Wo con
cluded a little harmless fttti might lie possi
ble, oven ir wo were iuudispiute ror any
thing heavy, mi we made the club iff light,
very light timber, something seasonable, und
calhsl It "Froth nml Foam." Wo met we
partnl but not In teats. The first meeting
was pisirly represented, ns I expected, and ns
we nro too honorable, lo make assessment
without representation, we barely paid ex
M.'iiscs. Considering the time or year, some
very brilliant remarks were uinde. One ot
our number was chosen to lead Hhukescnre's
hcutttirul ode to Dr. Talniage, lu which im;-.
curs the Hues;
"A man convinced ugalurt his will
Is of the same opliibn still."
Two members had the temerity to under
take nu argument on the will; notwithstand
ing tho mert-iiry had reached the top of the
tills) and was falling in rounded globules of
sliver to the Moor beneath.
Betsey Johnson, u rental knbly verbose fe
male, claimed it an IniMissible condition of
mind; that no one could Isiujuvinced of an
opinion nml nt the same time hold an op
M)slte one. Dolorosa Llmbklit, equally ver
bose, insisted nml stood prepared to prove
that a person could lie convinced against his
will A K-iico maker, having seen the pro
verbial durability or female argument fully
cxciiiplllled on runner occasions and smell
ing danger, came to tlio res 'lie and saved the
chili touiMirarlly by advising the belligerents
to liy the subject on or under tho table till
the mercury returned to the bulb; and In
tlio meantime, to compi utilise on Saiiiue
Buthr's much more sensible lines ns follows:
"Ho that complies against his will
Is of his own opinion still."
Motion approved, seconded and carried.
Ho tho dissemination of opinion by these as
pirants for logical deductions etc., wnsrrost
bltten by ISO degrees or mercury lu tho shade
mid the will remains In statu quo ante hel
ium. However, the jrld will still go on
Just the same. There Is to much Informa
tion anyhow. Tls time Ut call a halt uud re
duce the volume. Itillntlou Is getting too
much for us. If, us I fear, our club, being
lioth light and combustible, Is consumed
while passing through the orlllinnine tff fiery
splendor to which we are at pi went subject
ed, I will upprlse you or It's deml.e ami bid
you to the ohseiule. H It liven, wo will trv
uud uscertuiu whether one cun be convinced
I against his will. Ckickkt.
j The well known llrin ot Small and Wal
i luce have dlsolved partnership and In ruture
mo iiiisiness win no conducted by Mr. Small
and will be known as Small's Htenm Laun
dry. New and cotuinodlom quarters have
been secured lu the nowly completed three
story brick block at 'JOH-SOIC O street,
where they will remove In the course iff a
few days. The business will ! personally
siqiervlsed by .Mr. Hmiill who Ims had many
yentsol experience In the laundry business,
huh in u.iscuy nun the east, and having
purchased almost an entire new plant und
employing only the tno-t eHleiic uud
skillful labor that can be hud, will Im able to
riirnlsh lietter woik than any of their eoni
jietltors. In order to uecommisluto their
numerous patrons, they have established a
downtown olllce at IlKn north Eleventh
street where all work and orders may be
left. They have also procured two addition
al wagons and trls will bo made dally for
collections and delivery or goods. Having
the Is-st facilities available they are esscial
ly desirous of nrociiklnif hull.-, tln 1-,,,-m..,,,.,
r ni iin inn
and guarantee all work to lie perfectly satis
factory. Call them up. Telephone 670.
Not a C'ltUeit
of Lincoln can afford tombs tho comfort ami
safety offered him by the North Western
Line (F. E. ,t M. V. im.) In his travels to
and Iroiii Chicago and all eastern points. It
is tho direct Hue to St. Paul, Minneapolis,
ui;iiinii, OTiiuie, incoiun, and all other Miu
llesota, Washington uud Montana points.
All passengers tor these isiints go through
without dejKit transfer Patronize the North
Western and avoid omnibus transfers. It Is
thoonlyall rail Hue to that Sanatiiriuui of
the world, the Hot Springs of South Pakos
ta ami the direct Hue to ltapid City, Dead
wood and Black Hills Klnts. To all thoso
contemplating a ti Ip the coming season It of
fers a dliect lino and service, to till the re
sorts of Wisconsin, Minnesota nml Northern
Michigan. The lluest fhhltig grounds In the
world are leached by this line. For rates
and information, call at I KG O street.
W. M. Siiipmax, Gen'l Ag't,
J. T. M.vhm, City Tk't Ag't.