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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 9, 1915)
9 The Bees Home Ma ( 'J 111- W;K: OM AHA, TIllJIiSDAY, SKPTEMKKK 191.1. The Selfishness of Men The New Hats from the Fall Openings in Paris Iki'publishcHl by Special Arrangement with Harper's Bazar. si vrr : - & By DOROTHY DIX. There la a lovely theory that every man la a kind of guardian angel the little cherub that sits up aloft and generously protect and disinterestedly plays the part of providence to women. In reality, from the cradle to tha grave man Is en Based In a steady Job of setting the beat of her. Of roursc, he doesn't mean It. More, he Is sublimely uncon scious of this being; the case. As he rigures tt out, life Is simply a case where somebody must get the hot end of the bar gain, and he is convinced that somebody ihbuld wear petticoats. He even thinks woman likes it, and takes credit to himself for letting her live at all. Tjook where you will, and you see man's selfishness to woman illustrated at every 1 turn. i Even in love man Is never satisfied unless he geta back ten times as much as he gives. Ills affection for a woman may bo of the most milk-and-water cliar acter, but she must hand him out a double distilled essence of deathless de votion, a hundred and fifty proof. More over, she must back it up with a steady flowing stream of gratitude because he had ne goodness to notice her and ask her to marry him. Just watch tho next engaged couple you meet. Isn't the girl doing all the talking and looking pleased, and making all the effort to be agreeable? And Isn't the man sitting up with a complacent and patronising air that says plainer than words: "I permit this young person to adore me, and for once In my life I am aware that I have done a perfectly altruistic and noble thing." Observe the way a man acts when he gets Into trouble. Doesn't ha rush to some woman with his tale of woe? And doesn't she have to listen to It day ai day, and night after night, without ever betraying a symptom of weariness, pr daring to suggest that he's anything but a persecuted martyr? Tea, verily. But does any woman dare to tell any man, except her doctor and preacher, who are paid to listen, about her troubles? Not one. For experience has taught her that the minute she hoists tho rainy weather signal every man in sight grabs his hat and runs for shelter. If a man has a headache, doesn't he expect everybody In the bouse to be on the Jump fetching camphor, and Ice, and heaven knows what, and doesn't he make his wife sit by hi side and bold his hand, and pretend that she believes he's about to die? But if the wife Is sick dear me, he wonders what makes women have so many confounded nerves, and he says he never knows what to do around sick folks, anyway. And then he goes com fortably off to spend the evening at hi club playing poker. Which of the sexes has to do all of the adapting of Itself to the other? The feminine. When you listen to a man and' a woman talking together, Isn't the woman always trying to converse about something that Interests the man? Don't all the woman you know study up on the stock reports, the base ball score and politics. In order to be able to talk to men intelligently? And did you ever hear of a single man reading up on the new style of halr-dresslng, or the burning topic of the width of skirts. In order to be able to entertain a woman? Don't men demand that women must be perfectly satisfied with nothing live lier to do than keeping house, and rais ing babies, and an uninterrupted contem plation of their husband's charms? But imagine what would happen If one single woman demanded that a husband inter est should be confined within those nar row boundaries! Think of the brutal selfishness of good men who refuse to make their wives an allowance, and for the pleasure of show ing that they are masters, make high, spirited women come to them for every penny they spend. The women give the loving, faithful services of hearts and heads and hands, such as no money can hire In the open market, and yet there are men who are never willing to give them anything for it as their right. It is always bestowed as a favor, that women are expected to be grateful for, and men neither know, nor care, that a favor is as bitter on tho feminine palets as It is on the masculine. Consider the selfish point of view of man's adjudgment of rights and privi leges. If a man goes out with the boys and comes borne with the milkman In the morning In such a state that his wlfo has to get up and open the door for him, he thinks himself a poor, henpecked creature If she says a word. Suppose, however, a wife should do the same way even once. It would be the divorce court for hers, for there Is precious little a man will forgive a woman, but all eternity is not broat enough to bound what he expects her to forgive him. And what is It but the selfishness of man that for so many years kept women shut out from practically all educational privileges and gainful occupations, and that etUI keeps Ihem shut out of their political rights? Man had a good thing and he wanted to keep it for himself, and this is at the bottom of all the hue and cry about woman getting out of her sacred sphere. Man doesn't worry about woman's sphere until she gets some Job that he wants himself. And the funny part of all of this Is that rmui haven't any Idea that they are be'ng selfish to wpmen. Trhapa because they Mave been that way so lung Uu don't know any bette f These two models to . . i..f?ggS.j y Thc" two ,no,,B. to 'ft n1 rint SS$ v' the left are very chic. P) gS " at opposite extremes among the "m, 1A .1 The first is a play on 1 J newshaj.es. The former is of black '' ' " ft I !' th familiar cocked Q. X. MUn monslet.r. with little lnS of f . v-jgSggaggJ I, ,V ft bat, in dark blue, and jSflfZ n'fk brotdered in old gold it V'fck I ' 4r the second is in Oari- AjTJL & p the brim. The f.,.J t CVvf U baldl red. in velvet. ,f -1 Vjj model on the right is a more work-a- fer .-i S. J's li A faille and ribbon. vV j dy bat. In tel. d negre velvet, with lArr'J fK ri rM WiSL V W: y ban wide stiff bow in th WCLIte4f "v4!.,.A tX sVJll f' back of black faille ribbon, the cords fivmftSW n r. Sometimes Virtue is Its Only Reward Are You Fond of Yourself? By ANN LJSLE. There was once a pretty, young girl whose employer was known as "Old Skinflint." He paid his private secretary pi a week for sitting at a stuffy little desk In a dark corner and working from 9 till . His own daughters got $S a day to ex pend In bright corners of electrio-llghted tea rooms or anywhere else they chose. And it never occurred to Old Skinflint to think of his private secretary as exactly human and as full of the Joy of living as were the butterfly young per sons whose allowances were so much more because private secretaries were so much less. The wrongs of the young woman who earned $8 a week Instead of being given that much a day Included the fact that she had to hurry down a cold lunch which the office boy brought her and to stay at night frequently to get out let ters of. which the boss bethought himself at a quarter to six, and which he must sign and get off the very first thing In the morning. Tho year that our pretty, young girl came to work for Old Skinflint hut family decided to summer in Cali fornia. And at the end of the month he found himself very lonely Indeed. Now the girl's name waa Dulole, and she looked exactly as sweet and Inef fectual as her name Indicated. She had golden hair which actually did fall in ringlets about a classlo white brow not at all marred by the fact that it waa distinctly low-brow. And her big, blue eyes were as vacant as shallow pools. Her nose waa little and pert, her mouth soft and tender, and her chin and Jaw suggested babyish beauty rather than strength. One afternoon at 5 Old Skinflint, who waa lonely Indeed, leaned across his desk I and asked, "What do you say, my dear, to a little dinner with me this evening?" Dulcle knew very well that a little illn Jner with Old Skinflint would be likely to I bear no relation to such salaries as IS a week. Also she had read a great deal of modern literature about Beauty and the Beast, and Morals and the High Cost of living. So she fixed her eyes firmly on Old Skinflint, said a little prayer for the Job she was quite sure she waa losing and then recited her creed: "I am engaged to a young man and t am In love with him, and whenever X get enough saved up out of my IS a week to buy me 1100 worth of trousseau I am going to marry him. So I don't go out to dinner with any married men see?" Old Skinflint blinked and remembered that his Annabel had presented him with $1,500 worth of bills for her summer ward robe and that Christine's hadn't cost much less, and then made a very re markable speech. "Quite right, my dear. The world would probably disapprove of your din ing with an old man who might very easily be your father but If you and your young man wait for a hundred dol lars to pile up you will probably know many times as lonely as these I have while my folks are In California. ''So from Monday on you get 110 a week and maybe some time the young folks will take your papa along to Coney." And when Dulcle told her young man about It,' he said, "Nuts! The sly old dog Is probably crnry about you, kid. You ought to be very careful, but play the game right and you can probably get papa to pay you 115 a week while be Is feeling lonesome for his girls out In ' California." I However, Dulcie's next pay envelope contained the usual S, and when she ventured a protest. Old Skinflint looked at her with no glimmer of understanding and informed her curtly that there were plenty of young women with ability quite equal to hers who would be glad to work for IS a woe!c, and if the salary waa not sufficient she was of cotirno free to seek better pay. Dulcle stayed and continued to save . dollar a week out of her munificent alary. Moral: Sometimes virtue Is its only reward. By UKATBICR FAIRFAX. Pride Is generally considered as a rather contemptible thing. It Is. unless It has the right foundation. To be proud of the circumstances Into which rhance hss thrust you, to be proud of the beauty with which a clean-living line of an cestors has dowered you, or to be proud of the wealth with which a hard-fisted grandfather has Invested you any of these Is Indeed a contemptible form of pride. But this pride I should scarcely call Advice to Lovelorn By Beatrice FsJH&x Don't Be Jealoaa. Dear Mlse Fairfax: 1 am a boy IS years old, and I go with a girl my ago; I also have a friend who 1 think likes this Kirl. She makes dates with mo and then he makes dates with my friend. I have asked her who she want-d to see, anl she said me. lo you think that 1 should get "sore" at her for making dates with mv friend? HOY. Your youth makes your attentions to her anything but serious, thus giving her the privilege of going with others If she chooses. Don't spoil her good times by assum ing a gravity your years do not sanction. It Is Hade .a rrvtest. Dear Miss Fairfax: I am at a loss to know whether It Is the proper thing for a young lady to offer to pey her owu fare when meeting a young man on her way to business. 1 met a rusual ac qalntance and he paid my fure; then, when he entered the subway, he paid my f fare again. I was afraid to offer to pay my own. because on a similar occasion, when with another young man, 1 offered to pay my fare, he was Insulted. T. F. When you meet a musoullne acquaint ance and he pays your car fare, thank his graciously. Do not belittle yourself or him by discussing this little social courtesy, which Is quite to be taken for granted. Itefnse Hint, by All Means. Dear Miss Fairfax: I am V. and met a man flltccn years my senior, but he looks 60. I hnve only seen him twice, and he has asked me tor my hand. 1 do not love him at all, but my people want me to marry him because he Is wealthy, while I am (oor. I thought If I became engaged to him 1 could learn to love him, but I find I can't What shall I dot IN 1KHIU1. There never was enough wealth in the world to mean happiness to a marriage without love. Refuse him, and make your refusal final Don't let any one force you Into a marriage like this. worthy of the name it Is rather con tempt Dbly stupid snobbery, and, heaven help us, most of us are all too likely to be snobs of Just this unintelligent sort. That we are snobs of this sort some of us calmly know, and some of ia stupidly don't. Some of us find amusement In our own Instinct of excluslveness, and others take It so solemnly that we are hope lessly Impeded by tt With a temperate excluslveness tempered by a sense of humor and based on a knowledge of human frailty I have no fault to find. It actually has an Instructive value to the excluded and compels them to cul tivate powers and manners thst will take them Inside the paling of worth while society. Excluslveness Implies the survival of the fittest. It Is necessary to human society. With the sort of pride that makes one dainty and exclusive and Insistent on good manners, one can find no more fault than w'th that which makos one insist on eating with a fork Instead of with a knife, or on keeping one's hands clean and smooth. Being proud of yourself means first of all not being ashamed of yourself. To fall In having your soul and mind and body as clean and well ordered as cir cumstances will permit would be a mat ter of which one should be horribly ashamed. But in order to be proud of yourself you must band circumstances to your will and be a II tie cleaner, and neater and finer and stronger than they seem to permit Making tho most of yourself is scarcely a cause for pride you have to make a bit more of yourself than the material warrants. There Is no necessity for look ing down on the people beneath you the th'ng you have to do Is to look up, quite unenvlously. at the people above you and very calmly to proceed to reach and pass them. It Is very easy to make excuses for yourself. But how can any Of vs be proud of the person we have to explain and mnke allowances for? Tou may well be proud of yourself If at the end of a day you know you have seised on every opportunity that flitted across your vision and If you know that you have held yourself rigidly to a standard so high that you had to strain every nerve and muscle to reach tt The very moment that you hsve Just cause to bo proud of yourself you are likely to bo most humble about what you have Vet to accomplish. True pride Is actually of royal lineage and Is quite unashamed of failure, slnoe It means to build on failure to success. True prldo exacts everything of Itself and nothing of the world; but It never permits the world to drag It down or soil it . It Is nvver ashamed of Its be ginnings snd never falls to recognlso the fact that whence you( come means noth- thing. It Is quite ready to lend a hand to fellow travelers and quite unwilling to yield one Jot of Its staunch climb up ward to any temptation. You can t be proud of yourself unles you are climbing, but that pride la a purely personal matter between you and your soul snd should be Inflicted on ni one else. It should mean excluding no human being from your sympathy,, but every unworthy thing from . your plan of life. When you can look yourself straight In the eyes and tell yourself, "I did my best and I criticised no one Ise because his best did not happen to be mine," then you may Indeed be proud of yourflf. ' o uooa muisic bel. ongs in every Lome and the Victrola Buts it there BY ALL MEAN'S Hear the following numbers of the new Victor Records, on sale now. The greatest list ever Issued In any one month: 74443 Old Black Joe, by Alma Gluck with male chorus. 35466 Angels' Serenade and Ave Maria (equal to a Red Seal). 17822 Lal'aloma (Saxaphone Sextette). 35477 Old Time Sonis, by mixed chorus. 88540 Blue Danube Waltz, sung by Frieda lleniple. 74 4 IS A Great Sonp, by McCormlck. 87216 Thine Eyes, by Mlscba Klman and Frances Alda. 74445 The Broken Melody (a beautiful violin number by ZimbaUnt). 4 5066 Two Cello Solos, by a wonderful lady artist. 60137 Irish Kyes of Love (another River Shannon). 17802 Two attractive Accordeon Solos, by Pietro Dlero. 17805 Two of Mendelssohn's must popular compositions for orchestra. 17648 Two splendid Military Hand Marches. If you don't hear them Take the Numbers for future reference, for they are great. There are Victors and Victrolas in great vari ety of styles from $10 to $300, and any Victor dealer will gladly dem onstrate them and play any music you wish to hear. Victor Talking Machine Co. Camden, N. J. Her SclmiDlleF & lee PIANO COMPANY 1311-1313 Farnam St Omaha, Neb. Ilear the Newest Records in Our Newly Remodeled Sou nd-1 "roof Demonstrating Kooma on lit Main Floor. Mctoraslsa Branch at 334 BROADWAY Council Bluffs Izkt. Cycle Co Victrolas Sold by A. MOSPE CO., 1513-15 Douglas Street, Omaha, and 407 West Broadway. - Council Bluffs, la. Talking Machine Department in tho Pompeian Room ' r -!if I Victrola XVI, $200 Mahogany or oak