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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (March 29, 1911)
TUB I1KK: OMAHA. WKDNKSDAY. MAT6CII 29. 1911. Hme Ma Ohe, Dees Junior. Dkthday Dgdk Dottio Dialogues HY WALTER A. SINCLAIR. This Time it it Fink Circm Lemonade Piffle. Ml he ecg This is ihe i 1) t Hprlng U profanely heralded by th 'Cus Twins 'lr u4 Cro," observed Dottle. we Wended our way through the men sgcrie toward the big ihow. "I suppose th sawdust U furnished by he clown's old sews," I chirped. "Here w hav th leopard, with a pri vate detective constantly In attendance, to kep him potted," he continued. ' "And yonder is the camel, of which the farmef said. There hain't no euch ani mal!" " I added. To the ght, the fee-ro-olous Bengal ; tagger, the only vegetarian tagger In cap ' tlvlty," she announced. In her elrcu voice "Likewise the roaring Nubian lion, cap tured In th wilds of Hamburg, Germany," 1 Interposed. "He Is called a.roerlng lion because his Brooklyn attendant feeds him JrtAt he call 'rawr meat, in place of bis usual Hamburg teak." "Ah, th keeper steaks him to a roar." she comprehended. "Here we have th celebrated dik-dlk, a same some would like to condense to a ' dlx. found In the Jungles of Africa and Albany, training with tigers." quoth I. "And to the left the bandarlog, in their ,, bandarlog cabin," she hinted. "I grow , athlrst for knowledge." "Well, I'll negotiate for two gourds of pink lemonade, but mind you, don't try to bite, bend or Injur Jha lemon, as It Is plaoed In the glass purely for ornamental purposes," I sighed. "I am going to patent t a plaster of parts lemon slice for circus lemonade.!' "Be sure you us fast colors or you'll be guilty of plaster of parlslds," she ' warned as we sipped. "Mayhap you feel goobernatorlal?" I Insinuated, feebly, ' "What's a circus without peanuts?" she countered. "By all means." I'll n.if buv all. only two sacks," I re torted. Indignantly. "What kind of a shell same are you proposing?" , "I thought maybe some of that sticky ink noDcorn which adheres to ones nn gers and chin would furnish local color," she cooed, hopefully. "Pop-oorn sounds so suggestive of pro- dossJs." 1 demurred. "Kvldently you ar not a buffalo," h intimated coldly. "I don't quit get that," I admitted ...V cWhy buffaloes?" "Th buy on," sh explained, weeruy. Lot us hasten past th baggag room," I cried "Old stuff about th elephants' trunks?" she Inquired. A "WHILE, TO THE RIGHT " "I'm looking for the Mexican hairless dogs of war," I remarked. "They're now on Chl-wow-wow having a close shave," she snickered. "After that I'm too faint to stand." 1 asserted. "Let us hasten In to the main arena In time for the grand entry, pre senting a pageant of parading, promenad ing paragons, a glittering galaxy of gor geous gayety, a stunning, scintillating sun bunt of surprisingly superfluous satiety, a" "You don't get paid for that, do you?" she asked, anxiously. "I was merely sketching a miniature," I expounded. "Sounded like you were painting th larger canvases, speaking artistically." , "Let us In to see the equestriennes and trapeze soubrettes In their harem skirts, considerably shrunken," I suggested. "Would you call the damsels who per form on the horlsontal bars 'barmaids?' " she queried. ' "I might, if I was a bit foggy,". I re plied. "Hark! The band, again playing that familiar 'umpah' theme. How It take m back!" "Just when I wanted to go forward," she said. "Have you no sentiment - when you go to the circus?" I demanded. "What char acter la your favorite?" "The ringmaster," said she, emphasising ing ring and looked Into my eyea with th most Innocent glance. (Copyright, 1911, by th N. Y. Herald Co ) Glad to Have Bunny Back j ;S& 'Mstayg yZZSff' AMi)ff Y&ft ART AN f . ygCWjrei rV. yT y' OPRl V w g w3 ..rlr vrb .-foys " . C v. Arr TrrC s v far mXft) f TfSY AK& REAL XOttS) X '0 fS ?2i t, , C ?ri.Y,l SE CULTIVATE TSAJ t WCtO rw JtiM s ll lvKS e v---" "jr l I J-(n?t; svcwty.J Vfei-Jl' ' TvT bkzfJ 95,000,000 &7 Mm, fm mi fS1 'L T ( - I"' " z DayVe Celebrate c , y'z:- I RALPH RRDFITCLD, JU04 Blnney Street. Natii ind Address. Ellen M.. Atkins, 1739 Park Ave 1 ElUabeth Beers. 2301 North Twenty-fourth St., Elsie M. Christie, 1608 Burdette St Leroy Cremwell, 1D01 Lothrop St Delia Detamore, 2016 Charles St Fern O. Dudley, 1811 North Twenty-sixth St Lon March 29, 1911. Hrhool. , Park . . . . Long . . . Lake . . . . High . Kellom .. Loretta's Looking Glass-Holds it Up to Girl W ho is Domineering J t "Is It a i Vemking dowi i I "No, no," ' Oisnd. Borne V i i r "Bunny, let's play borae. You b th horse and I'll" "But I don't want to play horse, Buster. My cheeks ar all hot bow." "Thaf th way with Uttl alatara. Just when you want to play'hora and things th most, why thy won't." But my head all hurts," whimpered Bunny, as you gently but firmly tied the topes about her arms and finally careened away. slaahUuj your whip which was Just a switch and acting as much Ilk a coach man as memory and circumstances would permit. Down th path in th cardan, around th lilac trees, back to th front porch you di-ov your prancing steed. minute new," gasped Bunny, wn on th veranda steps. you urged, taking ber by th Somehow th feel of that tiny hot hand and the queer look on Bunny' fac dampened your ardor and you. too, sat on the step close beside her. Mother came out and found you there, and when you told her you were resting because Bunny was all hot and achy, sh was all in nutter at one. First sh smoothed back Bunny' bright hair that waa all gold and shiny when th Sua Man peeked through th curls. Then mother looked at Bunny's tongue and fait her wrist. . Befor you could ask why Bunny couldn't play horse any mora, aha had been whisked away in mother's arms and was lying in her cool little; room with her nlghtl on In the middle of th day. For a long time after that you didn't see Bunny any Dior. There waa no on to fight for you whan th Junes boys didn't play fair and you couldn't drive because there was no horse. You saved the apple th Cook Lady gav you, three bites of which belonged to Bunny, for days, and were still saving It. Every day you asked, "Will slater play with m tomorrow?" And when you asked, tears would run down mother's cheeks and father would say, "Not tomorrow, my man." Once, when you had been dreadful quiet all day, and father stayed horn and you only saw blm and mother once, with their faces all scared and white, you slipped up to Bunny's door and peeked through. You weren't quit sure th Uttl girt that lay so still on th bad was Bunny sh was so thin and all her golden curls were gone. Then when you knew It was Uttl slater you saw they had taken away Teady. th roused her and awakened her mind to activity." "When sh comes to play with m again I'll giv hr all my appls." you volun teered, as mother and father each held on of your hands so tightly It hurt. And you were sorry for th ' Jones boys, who didn't have any HttU sister" to whom t give their apples. r Knock Another Knock J Women have a bad reputation In on respect. Bom men wouldn't give a rea cent for their chances of coming out even if they bad to deal with women, and among 1 these are men who manage those restaur ants where each person helps himself. One of them expressed himself very em phatically th other day to a. woman who bad evinced an Interest In the shortcom ing bo of her sisters. "If 1,000 men 'were to com In here and each one ate fl worth. I would have just 11.000." he said, by way of example. "On the other hand, if I should feed 1,000 women and allow them to pick out their own checks I might possibly have $500. but I doubt It- Oh, they are natural morn cheats, women are. It seem to be a sixth sense In every woman's makeup to try to get aheaed of th person who provides her meals. It Isn't lack of money that makes them do It, either: It's dishonesty, pure and simple, that's all." ' ; Th woman to whom those horrifying revelations had been made walked away trying to evolve some plan for emanclpat Ing her sisters from the web of dishonest propensities In which they had become en meabed. Ovitelde th restaurant she met a man friend. "I'v just been down there for lunch," Ji said. "Glorious place; cheap, too. It a fellow has th knack It is dead easy to get a Ge-cent meal for a quarter. I work 'cm that way nearly every day. They never watch the men, but I tell you they keep a sharp eye on you women." New York Herald. "See that the things are sent at once!" the domineering girl said, with the arro gant, supercilious, self-important air that ah always uses to those she considers her Inferiors. But this time she met her match in the little Irish saleswoman, who poised her pencil above her book and said, "Shall I send it car of th prialdent at the White House or Balnt Peter at the pearly gate?" For once th domineering girl was meek. She gav her address like a lady and left th stors as soon as possible. For domin eering girls do not like to, be reduced to their elemental Ingredients by a clever "In ferior." That is th reason why the servants, the clerks, the people who are dependent and cannot retaliate for fear of losing their bread and butter Jobs are chosen as the victims of th girl who domineers, the ring mistress of modern life. Ob, but It's a hateful trait! Its Just r Yawn for Your Health J1 Yawning may be very impolite, but all beautiful whit. bear. Santa brought her to"!6 uam he Aoct0 re now decl-r1n keen .... th- Bd. Man. and M..h ,hat good awn healthy cxercls for keep away th Boogie Man, and which slept - clasped in her arm every night Down to th playroom they flew. Perhaps that was. why Bunny waa so whit ah was. afraid without Teddy. You found blm tucked - away with Belinda doll In a play basket Back to the room you scur ried and, without asking mother or father or th woman in th whit cap and apron who took car of th bottle and teaspoons, you marched up to th little pal girl on the ' bed, ' Leaning close over her shorn head, you said, "Bunny, here la Teddy come to aleep with you." Slowly Bunay'a eyes opened and the coraera of her mouth smiled. "Buster Teddy, aha whlrpered In th Weakest Uttl volo that mad your throat all tight, you felt so sorry. Then mother and father had you In their arms. "Mjr man. that is th first word uttl sister has spoken la a week." said father. . "Father, Buster, sh spoke te us Bunny poke te us." Mother waa laughing and crying both together. "Kb Just wanted Teddy, that's all. She's afraid without him,' you explained. lr. Brown came while you were speak- v Ing. For a long time he stood by the bed ) and looked at Bunny. Sometimes he did queer thins, Uk placing hla head against her and putting a silver thing la her mouth. Every en was so atlll they didn't even breath. "Hubert Is better. Th crisis Is past." he aald la a grave vole. "Something has for th lungs and throat Dr. Emil Bunsl, th dlstlnguUhed throat specialist of Vienna, in speaking recently of diseases of th throat and remedies, said that yawning la a valuable exercise and should be encour aged. Morever, yawning has recently been recommended Independently as a valuable exercise for th respiratory organs. According to Dr. Naegli of th University or L.uettlch, "yawning bring all th res piratory muscles of the chest and throat Into action, and la, therefore, the best and most natural means of strengthening them. He advises everybody to yawn as deeply as possible, with arras outstretched. In order to change completely th air In th lungs and stimulat respiration. In many caaea be has found th practice relieve the difficulty in swallowing and disturbance of the sense of hearing that accompany ca tarrh of th throat. Th patient Is Induced to yawn through suggestion. Imitation ef a preliminary exercise In deep breathing. uvsuaut consists of trout six te eight yawns, each followed by th opera- uon oi swallowing, a should be added. however, that It is quite possible for deep breathing te be overdone, particularly by persons with weak hearts, and It la at least open to question whether the ob stacles te free reeptratloa, which the yawn Ing cure la alleged to remove, are not ore ful la preventing the entrance of germs and other foreign bodies." as mean as hitting a man when he Is down or picking on an enemy weaker and smaller than yourself. It is doing that! And you seem to think that you are emphasizing your own importance, Im pressing people with the sis of yourself. You are making th ones you abuse hate you. You are making every decent-minded person In your own set look down upon you. t The instant you domineer over one who is dependent on you la any way you have reached the vanishing point of your self respect And you make things hideously uncom fortable for those who are Inclined or de termined to treat servants and clerks and elevator boys and street far conductors as they should be treated. Wherever you pass you leave a trail of Insolence and indignation. The poison of your' arrogance puts a kink In the dis positions of perfectly well-disposed people. And an unoffending Individual gets snappy 'step lively.' A demure little lady who doe not shout out the number of th floor where she wants to leave th eleva tor Is carried past, and th elevator boy sends "Why don't you say whers you want to git off?" hurtling after ber. A polite shopper asks to be directed to a depart' ment, and the cash girl continues to chew gum as she yells a reply to the stock girl about the location of the milliner's pincers, The girl who domineers has so sbused their natural, Justifiable sense of equality that they have to giv themselves a few concrete Illustrations Just to be sure that their Independence is in working order. And th domineering girl talks about her Inferiors. Sh has no inferiors. There can be nothing inferior to the base spirit she manifests. She has gotten down on the bottom stratum. She Is cipher minus In value There simply can't be anything under her. Persistent Advertising is the Road to Big Keturna. PP"I soy HIT HE - heowk- tr sou don't UICK HIM-fLL UCK YOU- HEM.nrr r Zr!t NOW'VOU OUST L,lH " 1 ' ' i in 1 1 i Yea. 1901 1904 1899 1896 1901 1901 1900 1899 1904 1901 1897 1897 190S 1897 1901 Kennedy.. 189S 1904 1908 Algle Dllly, 1818 Ohio St Lake . . Florence Goehrlng, 2724 Blondo St Long . . Emily Hood, 2114 Grand Ave Saratoga Arthur Q. Jensen. 1423 Gust St Sherman Marie Jorgenson, 2427 South Twentieth St Castellar William Lebo, 2222 Ixard St Kellom , Lena Lokololusky, 2503 South Thirty-fifth St Windsor Florence Moller, 2717 Meredith Ave Saratoga Wlnnefred Modlln, 3840 Grover St Windsor Marion Osborn, 3118 Corby St Howard Margaret A. Ostrom, 1408 South Thirteenth St Lincoln Otis Pedersen, 2910 Franklin St Long . . August M. Propleach, Second St. and Boulevard. Adalbert Pierce, 2608 Franklin St Alfred Ryder, 2S60 Brown St Ralph Redfleld, 2004 Binney St Mary I. Reed, 4339 Miami St Harold M. Smith, 2630 Chicago St Grace Shipman, 1416 Jones St Margaret Talmage, 2025 North Nineteenth St... Mildred Tompsett, 1613 Lake St Dean Tinker, 311 North Twenty-first St Lillle E. Thrane, 172 4 South Seventeenth St Nelson B. Updike, Jr., 3614 Jackson St Columbian . Leonard P. Weber. 2226 North Forty-eighth St Walnut Hill. Doris E. Ware, 1711 Hickory St Comenlus 1899 Olivene Wllklns, 2726 Capitol Ave Farnam ...1904 Hannah Zllllch. 2816 Cass St Webster 1903 Ben Zalinsky, 2921 South Twenty-sixth St Im. Conception. . ..1903 . German Lutheran . Long . Saratoga . . . Lothrop . . . .Clifton Hill. . Webster . . . . .Leavenworth . .Lake .Lake , .Central . . Comenlus . . .1898 . . ..1904 lS9 5 .. . .1908 . . ..1906 . . . .1900 1903 . . ..1904 . . . .1898 1900 1896 ....1903 . . . .1896 Pituitary Gland Potential J Prof. Arthur Keith at th English Royal, college of Surgeons, believes giants can be raised In these days. He asserted this belief in a recent lecture on th fossil re mains of a giant. "Bo far," he said, "we have only un locked the door of th unknown. We do not know exactly what .the room will con tain when we enter it, but we think that when we have done that, we shall have the means of regulating the size and stature of body at will. Modern research has proved that the growth of a giant Is due to a diseased condition. Recent discoveries relating to th cause of giantism have shown that the key to the growth was found In what Is called the pituitary body at th base of the skull.. "It is a Uttl thing which would not fill a teaspoon. It la smaller than a grape, and yet we know it to be a thing of very great Importance. It was dis covered by a French physician, Ilerre Mart, who found also that In cases of abnormal growth this small body had en tered. He Jumped at the Idea that It must secret something which somehow affected th growth of th body. "Now it has been found that in the pitui tary gland are secreted a number of liquid substances which ar deposited In th blood. Possibly at a future date, scientists may be able to extract that one unknown essential substance and by feeding the Sub ject with it will be able to make the growth go on continuously. Now, normal growth occurs In stages. There are weeks when a child stays the same also. This Is followed by weeks when it grows, for the pituitary body Is only active by fits. ' "When the unknown secretion Is too plentiful In adults, It cause unusual stout ness, but In the young, who have not yet flniahed their growth, an abnormal growth, or giantism, results. Science therefore holds out th hop that people may be able to regulate their heights, and that beauty doctors may be able to work on strictly scientific principles. "If a lady, for instance, did not think that her nose was symmetrical a doctor could bring It to th shape required by means of a pltultal sandwich." When Nova Scotia Flirted with Uncle Sam J At this time, when certain British colonies are so touchy, apparently, on the possi bility of annexation, It will be Interesting to read certain resolutions Introduced in tho Nova Scotia legislature forty years ago. At that time the settlement of the Ala bama claims was pending, and some brave spirit put th Nova Bcotla sentiment in thes words: 'Whereas, Th Joint high commission appointed by the government of Great Britain and th United States of America to consider the Alabama claims (so-called), the fishery question and other matters in dispute between these two governments, will shortly sit at Washington; and whereas, It Is conceded by the British gov ernment that England may be liable to the Urlted States for a large amount on ac count of the Alabama claims aforesaid; and wherdeas, this hous Is most desirous that th burden should fall as lightly upon the Imperial treasury a possible; there fore, "Resolved, That this house do Immedi ately, through his excellency the governor general, Intimate to her most gracious majesty, the queen, that should sh be graciously pleased to cede this province to the United States as payment In part of In full of such claims, sues cession will meet with the cheerful consent of this hous; provided always that the United Btates will admit this province Into th .union as a state, with all th rights and privileges now held and enjoyed by any of the states comprising such union containing a Uk population, and upon such terms, financial or otherwise, as may be agreed upon by such Joint high commission, the terms of such cession to b sanctioned by th gov ernments of Great Britain and the United States, and to be ratified by the people ef this province at th polls." Nothing aver came of the movement. f Man Still Gropes Darkly V Prof. T. D. A. Cockrell of the University of Colorado, in Popular Science Monthly, writ In interesting fashion of th social conditions likely to exist In th futur. He ays that In th garden of Eden, at the very beginning of his career, man ac quired th sens of sin and was henceforth to be a wanderer in a spiritual as well as a physical sens Henc It comes that we. In this year UU, think; proper to tnquir anxiously about th future of our species, an Inquiry which would certainly never occur to any ether species of muimsL "Along with the development of th med ical and agricultural science, w may hop for great advance In social organisation, reducing to a minimum th tremendous wast of life and property which goe on today. It is not too much to xpct that very Individual will be assured all the air, food, clothes and shelter necessary for a normal exlstenoe, and will find ampl op portunities for exercising such talents as he may posses. "Liberty will be ourtalled In so far as It permit anti-social activities, but It will be tremendously extended, In the form of practical opportunities, to develop ordinary or special abilities. "All this may be a long way ahead, and ther may exist great differences as to th program for th near future; but I suppose that few will deny that such out come as that Indicated should logically follow from Indefinite advance In th di rection w are even now taking." A Tesvjrfal Recital. "Gentlemen," said an American, who had been listening to some "steep" stories, "you hav all don your best, but I think any yarn will make your look small. I was one treed by a most ferocious bull moose. To make matters worse, my am munition gave out. As I thought of th loved one at horn tear cam in my yes, rolled down on to th palm of ray hand, and frose hard as marbles. A happy thought flashed through my mind. Taking the frosen tears, I rammed them Into my gun, biased away, killed the moose, and then, gentlemen, and then" The story-teller's audience filed ouC- Tit-Bits,