TTTfi OMATIA DAILY BEE: SATURDAY, MAT?CIT 7, 1f03.
Tim OmaHa Daily Bee.
rOCNDED' BT EDWARD nOSEWATER.
VICTOR KGBEWATEK, EDITOR.
Rntered at Omaha Pustofflca a second
class matter.
TERMS OP FUI1SCR1HTION:
Tally Ilea (without Bunday). one ear..H00
liclljr b and Sunday, ona year (00
Bunday Bee, ona year i-M
fcaturday bee, ona yaur 10
DELIVEHKD BY CARRIER:
Dally Ilea (Including Bund,)), per week.ISc
iJfcilr Bee (without Bun-lay), por week.ltfc
Evening licit (without' Hundaj). pT week c
Evening Be (with Sunday), per wwk.lOc
Addreaa all eomplalnte of Irregularities
In delivery to City Circulation Department.
OFFICES:
Omaha The Bee Building.
Bouth Omaha City Hall Building.
Council Bluffs IS Bcott Blreet.
Chicago lwo University Building.
New York Ut Home Life Insurance
Building. .
Washington T2S Fourteenth fltreet N. w.
CORRESPONDENCE.
Communications relating to ncwe and edi
torial matter ahonld be addressed, Omaha
bee, Editorial Department.
REMITTANCES.
Remit by draft, express or postal order
payable to The Bee Publishing company.
Only 2-cent stamps received In payment of
mall account a. Personal check, except on
Omaha or eastern exchanges, hot accepted.
STATEMENT OF CIRClAl. VTION. ..
ftate of Nebraska, Douglas Coutny, a :
George B. Taachuck, treasurer of The
Bee lAibllahlng company, being duly aworn,
aya that the actual number of full and
complete contra of The Dally. Morning,
ICvenlng and Sunday Bee rrlnted during
the month of February., 1908. waa aa fol
low!: 1 t 36.760 16..... . 30.100
i .....J M.300 IT S8.900
I.. M.180 II 36.930
4 38830 1 30,730
1 38,910 20. r 36,300
... 36.080 21..;;....... M.340
7 Sfl,M 22 .. a30
I...... 86,030 23 38,500
35,000 24.;......... 36,300
10 36,M0 II 36,70
11 36,100 2... 36,490
11 30,9.00 27 W.M0
1 3OJ00 21 86,380
14 86,100 29 3650
II...... 36,110
Totals 1,046,660
Leas unaold and returned copies.
8,437
Net total 1,039,113
Dally average 36,631
QKORUH B. TZ3CHUCK,
Treasurer.
Subscribed In my presence and aworn
to before me this 2d day of March, 1903.
ROBERT HUNTER,
Notay Public.
wiiE.i oct or TOWS,
afescrlbera Iravlag (he city tern
porarllr ahonld have The Be
a,Ul te them. Address will be
changed attest aa requested.
The two perils Just now are
"predatory wealth" and "predatory
pollUclang."
Kentucky la the flrit state to prove
that tobacco Is worse than whisky as
a crime breeder.
It may help If Mr. Maxim's inven
tion of a noiseless explosive Is used
in the Fourth of July fireworks.
A French woman has com to this
country to urge "corset for mon."
Most men are rather fond of them
already.
The democratic statesman from
Hall and the republican statesman
from Lancaster might hold a consola
tion party.
The navy may not be In the beBt
condition possible, but it la believed
that It will withstand any bombard
ment of paper bullets. .
Those New York to Paris autolsts
probably never stop to think that this
Iowa and Nebraska mud is just what
is needed for the wheat crop.
A New York anarchist asserts that
self-preservation la the first law of
nature. That Is one excuse for the
elimination of the anarchists.
The United States is negotiating an
arbitration treaty with Switzerland.
Boston may quit losing sleep over fear
of an attack by the' Swiss navy.
I 1 . . '.
Japan has ' sent a commissioner to
learn how the city of New York is
governed. If he finds out, he will be
doing a favor by telling the taxpayers
of New York.
The Atlanta Constitution la urging
the holding of a national farmers'
fair. It will be held In Omaha next
December and Georgia farmers are
cordially invited.
If coming events cast their shadows
before, the democratic national plat
form to be promulgated at Denver
pext July will fill nearly two newspa
per columns set in small type.
. Ouess the money panic is over all
right A Chicago bank has refused
to accept a pall of pennies for deposit
unless the patron first wrapped them
In packages of twenty-five each.
Now, don't all speak at once.
Which one of the Nebraska delegation
is to be cast In the role that Is to pre
sent the nam of the Nebraska candi
date to th Denver convention?
1 Vs aa MSs f Dtluala 4 n .- a Tk a 1.1
UW VMMB w DO J el HQ fiuu III
' spend $1,000,000,000 on a navy If be
could get the money. It is one of the
Joys of the day dreamer to figure on
what he would do If he had the money.
, Senator Bourne has offered to bet
$10,000 that "President Roosevelt will
i bo named at the Chicago convention."
Senator. Bourn la determined to get
tils share of attention; let It cost him
what it may.
' A witness before a senate commit-
-tee has testified that the American
navy was woefully . Inefficient In the
war with Spain. It is Interesting to
''not that the inefficiency was not cjia-
. covered by Spain.
If anarchUts must carry on their
work of attempted assassination, let
us hop they follow the example of
' that Chicago "Red" and attack none
but men who ar well armed and
' know Low to shooU
SAME OLD DEtfOCBATlO FLdTPORM.
It was to have been expected that
the democrats of Nebraska In promul
gating a platform should make It era
body the well known views of Mr.
Bryan so as to furnish a guide to the
platform makers In th Denver' con
vention, where his third nomination
for the presidency is assured. It was
also to have been expected that in for
mulating such a platform much that is
old and little that Is new would be In
corporated Into It. In these expecta
tions, no one will be disappointed.
Comparison of the platform Just put
out by the democratic state convention
with thst put out a. year ago by the
Nebraska democrats shows that this
year's platform Is mere repetition
without change of substance or
phraseology In nearly every plank and
that the new material In It consists
only of those pronouncements
grounded upon "the recent panic and
the conditions growing out of It. Mr.
Bryan wrote the platform In 1907 and
has simply added a few paragraphs to
bring It down to date and make it
pass current In 1903. The new sec
tions are those which deal with stock
watering and stock gambling, bank
deposit guaranties, the Aldrlch and
Fowler bills and the stricter enforce
ment of immigration laws against the
admission of foreign anarchists.
In many of his positions on public
questions Mr. Bryan Is not at variance
with the republicans, but on others,
such ns the tariff, the management of
our island possessions, the annihilation
of industrial combinations rather than
their regulation, he Is In direct vari
ance with the republican position. It
Is on these variations that the issues
of the coming national campaign will
be made up and they will furnish the
theme for most of the campaign discussion.
CARRYING CONCEALED WEAPONS.
The demand for stricter enforce
ment of the laws prohibiting the carry
ing of concealed weapons, emphasized
by the recent anarchistic outbreaks,
has a champion In Brigadier General
F. D. Grant, who has gone on record
in official condemnation of the prac
tice of allowing soldiers to carry con
cealed, weapons when off duty. A
coast artilleryman was convicted at
Fort Preble, Me., for assaulting a fel
low soldier and was sentenced to re
duction In the ranks, three months'
imprisonment and a forfeiture of pay.
The court-martial recommended clem
ency on account of sixteen years' faith
ful service, and because of a claim of
self-defense.
In approving the sentence of the
court-martial. General Grant reviewed
the facts, which showed that the
trouble started "In a public dive main
tained In violation of the law In the
city of . Portland, Me, a prohibition
state," and that when the soldiers ad
journed to an alley to" settle their dis
pute, the accused man drew a revolver
and shot his comrade In the leg. Con
cluding, the general says:
The practice of carrying concealed weap
ons la without any justification, la reprehen
sible, and when reeort Is unnecessarily had
to a deadly weapon, endangering the life
of a comrade, much more punishment should
be awarded than waa done In this case.
If the professional soldier, trained In
the use of firearms and fully instructed
as to the right to use them. Is not to
be allowed to carry concealed weapons
when oft duty, as General Grant in
sists he Is not, it is difficult to under
stand how any ordinary circumstances
would justify a private citizen In
toting a gun. There will be a decrease
In the homicide record when every
man caught with a concealed weapon
is arrested and punished.
PREPARING TO FROD CONGRESS.
According to reliable Information
from Washington, President Roosevelt
has determined to Interfere with the
plans of certain leaders, in both par
ties, of reactionary tendencies who
have been figuring on rushing the big
appropriation bills through and greas
ing the way for an early adjournment,
leaving many of his mora important
recommendations to come up at the
short session under the head of "un
finished business." The Roosevelt
policies meet the approval of a ma
jority of the members in both bouses
of congress, but some of the political
bellwethers have apparently committed
themselves to Inaction at this session
to avoid considering various subjects
which might have an influence in the
coming campaign, until after the presi
dential election.
President. Roosevelt Is much in
earnest in desiring the legislation he
urged upon congress in his annual
message. Regardless of the coining
campaign, he holds that the adminis
tration work, already so well begun in
the railway rate law and other meas
ures of that character, cannot be con
sidered complete without this supple
mental legislation. While some of the
matters may have to go over until the
short session, or until the new con
gress meets. It is understood that the
president will oppose adjournment
until congress considers these meas
ures: A new employers' liability law.'
A low restricting the Issuance of ex parte
Injunctions In labor dlsputea.
A perfected anti-trust law aa a substitute
for the Sherman act.
A law for valuation of railway properties,
and regulation of stock and bond Issues of
corporations engaged In Interstate com
merce.
The president believes that the peo
ple are back of him In his advocacy of
the enactment of these measures by
congress. Th whole course, of con
gress has furnished an Intimation of
Intention to defer action. Unlimited
ilm has bn allowed for discussion
of bills that have not Involved any
great principle or held any particular
Interest for th whole people. Th
president's plan for compelling action
has not been revealed, but there Is no
on who knows more than the president
about spurring congress on. He dem
onstrated his ability In that line when,
by messages to congress and open let
ters to the public, he aroused a senti
ment which forced an unwilling con
gress to take prompt action - on the
beef scandal, on Cuban reciprocity and
on the railway rate act. Resumption
of these tactics would doubtless con
vince congress of the necessity of
abandoning plans for adjournment In
April or early May and giving Imme
diate consideration to some measures
demanded for the benefit of the entire
nation.
liOW MVCll LVNOtRt
At a meeting of th populist state
committee held at Lincoln last Janu
ary a motion to dissolve the party or
ganization was voted down and a call
for "ft state convention" ordered in
which 612 delegates would be entitled
to seats.. The state convention has
been duly held. State Chairman
Manuel publicly proclaims that "In a
private meeting" there were 122 del
egates present, while In the public
meeting it was plain that not even
that number held up hands. And yet
the same state chairman adds. "This
is the largest convention the populists
have had for many years." ,
Taking Mr. Manuel at his word and
accepting his count of noses, the ques
tion propounds Itself, How much
longer Is the fusion farce to be kept
up In Nebraska? The populist party
once mustered 80,000 votes for John
H. Powers, running for governor in
1890 against nominees of both the
old parties. In three elections It won
out with its candidate for governor
and once had possession of all the
offices in the state house and both
branches of the legislature.
Since 1900 the populist organiza
tion has been nothing more than a
pig-tall to the democrats, kept up by
a small group of professional politi
cians using it as trading stock for
nominations or promises of appointive
places. The vast majority of the rank
and file of high privates tfho embraced
populism with honesty of purpose have
gone bacii to their former party affilia
tions. The Bo-called leaders, how
ever, continue their masquerade, de
luding themselves with the idea that
they are fooling somebody. The
steadily dwindling column of follow
ers behind them proves that those who
are willing to be fooled have become
mighty few in number.
PAYING DIVIDENDS WITH SCRIP.
The Public Service commission of
the state of New York, which has very
large powers overthe management of
railway and other corporations, has
just rendered an Important decision by
refusing to allow the Erie railroad per
mission to isBue scrip, representing a
dividend of 4 per cent on its second
preferred stock, to be paid on Novem
ber 1, 1917.
The proposition of the Erie is not a
new one, having been frequently
adopted throughout the country. It
has been one of the factors entering
Into the general overcapitalization of
the big corporations. It has become
almost a common practice for railroads
and other corporations to declare fancy
dividends, In some cases issuing addi
tional stock and apportioning it in lieu
of cash. In the Erie case, the scrip
offered as a dividend bore interest and,
in effect, became a liability of the
company, instead of a surplus asset.
The Public Service commission, in
denying the application, declared that
dividends must be declared only from
surplus profits and only when these
profits can be disbursed in dividends
without depriving the corporation of
the necessary working capital.
Had this rule been in effect for the
last half-dozen years, there would have
been no such marked inability of rail
way managers to secure funds for
needed betterments and extensions.
I nder the "high finance" methods of
railway operation, the practice has
Brown of distributing surplus earnings
down to the last cent in dividends,
thus making the stocks look hlghlv at
tractive to Investors and speculators,
vhlle funds for Improvements and ex
tensions have been secured by Issuing
new r.tock or new mortgage bouds, all
of which placed an additional tax on
tlio future earning capacity of the
roada. Had not the dividend rate beon
di&proiiortionately raised, the railroads
would have still been able to pay regu
lar dividends and provide working
capital. There will be less financial
Erlef In railway circles, If the roads
follow the rule laid down by the'Publfc
Service commission and limit dividends
to actual surplus earnings.
It takes cleverness to make a good
liar. While the World-Herald boasts
that "every county but three" was
represented in the democratic state
convention, its own roll call shows
nine absentee counties and the coun
ties that were fully represented by
complete delegations could be counted
on the fingers. As to being the best
attended democratic convention ever
held in Neb:aska, the records will
show that there have been Beveral
democratic conventions held in this
Rtate with much better attendance.
Colonel Bryan throws a special bou-
iuet at the World-Herald for remain
ing steadfast and true during the dark
days of 1896, when so'many demo
cratic dallies fell before the )landlsh
ments of the "money power." Mr.
Bryan knows why the World-Herald
etood steadfast He knows all about
the money poured into It by Marcus
Daly, W. A. Clark, John A. Crelghton
and the other sliver mine bulllonalres
who wanted an organ and were willing
to pay for It
City Electrician Mlchaelsen Insists
that It does not do Omaha any good to
be represented aa suffering from ft
handicap In the cost of power for fac
tories, especially when It Is not strictly
true. The way to get new enter
prises for Omaha Is to proclaim the
advantages we offer to show that the
proposed factory or Jobbing house can
be made more profitable here than at
some other competing location.
The four democrats In the Kentucky
legislature who voted for Bradley for
senator have been denounced by Mr.
Bryan as "embezzlers of power" have
been burned In effigy at Frankfort and
have been lauded at democratic mass
meetings in other counties as patriots
and saviours of the state. The Ken
tucky democrats are in fighting trim
again against each other.
The Omaha Commercial club wants
the freight houses of Omaha kept open
long enough to accommodate all busi
ness which may be offered by the ship
pers. This seems to be a reasonable
request, and If the railroads are on
the square in their professed desire to
co-operate with their patrons they will
make more satisfactory arrangements.
Two or three of the presidential
electors endorsed by the democrats are
still masquerading under the name of
populist What will tbey do if the
St. Louis convention puts a dyed-in-the-wool
populist ticket in the field
without waiting for the aid or consent
of any democrat on earth?
Omaha postofflce receipts continue
to show up better this year even than
last year, which was high water mark.
It is safe to say that in any compara
tive table showing the business of all
the postofflces of the country Omaha
would hold its own against any other
city of its class.
Kansas City te, doubtless glad that
Wu Ting-fang did not go through that
town on his way to Washington. He
would have been certain to have asked
some embarrassing questions about
the new union depot that was started
about the time Confucius died.
Prof. Starr of the University of Chi
cago has gone to the wilds of Africa to
search for a lost tribe of. cannibals.
It is a. risky job, of course, but the
professor prefers it to staying at home
and listening to the campaign spell
binders. Of course, it .will be merely coinci
dence that the 6llver service to be pre
sented to the battleship Nebraska and
the fleet that has been rounding the
Horn will arrive at San Francisco
about the same time.
Mr. Taft is very anxious to break
up the conditions which keep the
south solid in the democratic ranks.
He ought to encourage Mr. Bryan to
attempt to dictate to a few more
southern legislatures.
Chance for the Experts.
1 Detroit Free Tress.
If It should cost a corporation $300 for
killing a Pomeranian dog, what would bo
the remunerative figures for wiping out a
reputable American citlsen?
Spread of Liberty.
Philadelphia Inquirer.
The shah now dodges his J t V boir.l
with almost as much regularity a he bn'ta
bin breakfasts. The descendants ! I'srius
and Xerxes want their liberties.
Coppering; (he Colonel.
Cleveland Leader.
Kentucky la always Interested la wI'M
Colonel Watterson has to say, biK of lute
It puts a large copper on anything he offers
In the nature of political advice.
Impossible Mixture.
Philadelphia Inquirer.
Nineteen Prooklvn automobiles recently
made an "economy test." The effort to
make an automobile and economy mix la
tool stunt, but It's just like Brooklyn to
try It.
"Jealous of Honor."
' New York World.
The committee of Washlnirtnn rnr.
pendente has found auilty of Indiscretion
two of their number who did press agent
work for the Electric. Boat company In
the recess. Their action has been prompt,
as Ifshould be. The Washington corres
pondents are properly jealous of their repu
tation.
Practical Christianity.
Springfield Republican.
Secretary Taft Is a direct and sensible
speaker, conveying the Idea of soil, lit v nnrt
poise, and If the effect of his Sunday talk
in tspringiieid Is not to add to the financial
aupport of the Young Men'a Christian as
sociation, our people will be at fault. His
address was not a lay sermon, sfter th
fashion of William J. Bryan, but was ad
mirably adapted to the occasion, and of
especial value aa giving a new sense of the
dependence of the federal government upon
the helping hand of thla Dractlcal Christian
organization In dealing with our foielg.i
possessions and undertakings.
Kinetic Energy
Kinetic is good word. H
means "powcrto anaLe thinp
go." A fat bank, account, a
rock on the edjt of a ruH,
a barrel of ifunpoMfdcr, and
SCOTTS EMULSION afl
contain "kinetic energy."
so lt professor tctls us.
Power b stored up in
Scott's Emulsion
This force let loose in (he
system of the coewanpiivc
grra him the strenjtk to
take on nrw flesh. It b I
powerful flesh-producer.
AJDraashs.1 So, mad $L00l
OTnr.R I,AD THAW Ot R.
Indications are that rousti sledding Is
ahead for two projects In the Kngllsh llo-
ersl program religious teaching In the ele
mentary schools and the liquor business.
Former rrcmler rtalfour. leader of the
minority In the Mouse of Commons, has
bitterly assailed the liberals for both rro-
pos&ls and tha debate promises to wago
hotly. It Is accepted that If either or both
of these measures pasa the Commons they
will be defeated In the House of Lords.
The school measure presents the Issue as
to how far money raised by taxes shall
tie used to defray the expenses of re
llglous teaching and to what extent shall
such teaching be allowed. The bill aa In
troduced by the president of the Board of
Education relates only to elementary
schools and proposes that schools which
receive support from taxation shall be un
der the control of local boards which shall
offer no de-nomination tests for teachers. A
bill similar In Its provisions was rejected
by the lords last year and Its relntrodue
tlon at the present session Is In the nature
of a challenge which the lords will proba
bly not be slow to take up.
On the temperance plank ot the adminis
tration, the liberal proposal is to cut down
the number of licensed places throughout
the kingdom by some 30,0)0. which on Its
face appears not very difficult. It Is com
plicated, however, by the fact that a liquor
license has come to be looked on by its
owner as a vested right with a permanent
property value. The liquor business In the
kingdom has grown to Immense proportions
and the revenue from It Is sufficient to sup
port the British navy. It Is a big under
taking for the liberals and few look for
success at the present session of Parlia
ment.
The suffragettes found rather cold com
fort In the adoption by the British House
of Commons In allowing the equal suffrage
bill to pass the first reading by an over
whelming vote. What looked like a victory
for the measure paled to a defeat when,
without opposition, the measure was quietly
referred to a committee of the whole house,
which simply means that it has been
shelved for the, present session. The action
simply gave the members of the house an
opportunity to express their pious opinion
In favor of the claims of the suffragettes
without requiring them to go on record la
favor of the enactment of the measure Into
law.
Diplomatic circles throughout the world
are deeply interested In the recent maga
sine article from the pen of Baron Speck
von Sternberg, the German ambassador
at Washington, in which he explains that
Germany has no design or desire to ac
quire by conquest, annexation or absorp
tion either Holland or Belgium and he
aleo Intimates that Germany Is not going
to be aggressive in forcing its Interests
In Morocco or other countries. The arti
cle is accepted as Indicating a change of
German policy, as It is known that Baron
Sternberg Is very close in the counsels
of the emperor and would not have writ
ten the article without Imperial sanation.
It maks a decided change, apparently,
In the German policy. The German Col
onlal society has been for years advocat
Ing German colonisation in South Amer
Sea and plans have been pressed for tho
acquisition of German territory in China,
the break-up of the Austrian-Hungary em
pire and Germany's absorption of one'
half of the dual empire, the Germanlza
tton of a portion of Poland and an alll
aribe between Germany, Denmark. Sweden
and Norway that would check Russian
aggression In those countries. All Eu
rope would rest a little easier If Baron
von Sternberg's announcement of the new
program proves to be more than a mere
diplomatic disavowal of the - former Im
perial plans of colonial extension.
Consul Julean H. Arnold of Tamsut
writes as follows regarding the feasi
bility of shipping American lumber Into
Formosa:
"As for the market in Formosa, I am
able to state, as the result of an Inter
view with one of the largest dealers hero,
that there Is considerable American lum
ber In use in harbor and railroad works.
At present this lumber comes via Japan.
That which Is In special demand is the
Oregon pine girder, measuring twenty-
five to thirty feet In length by one and
one-half feet square. These are used In
bridge and trestle work In railway con
struction and repair for piles and girders
In harbor improvements. Extensive har
brfr Improvements in the port of Takao,
South Formosa, are at present being In
augurated. Harbor improvements In
Kelung, North Formosa, have been In
progress for several years and It will re
quire four years more to complete them.
That there Is considerable lumber used
In these works Is attested by the fact
that the dealer in question stated that his
contracts for supplying such materials
ranged In amounts from $5,000 to 126,000
gold from time to time. The freight rate
on lumber from Japan to Kelung la $1.60
per forty cubic feet. At present this
dealer pays 65 cents gold per cubic foot
for lumber of the dimensions above speo-
iried.
In spite of the heavy bounties that have
been paid to sugar growers In New South
Wales, Australia (about $1,300,000 aince
the fiscal year 1901), the area devoted
to the cultivation of the cane crop is de
creasing rather than extending. In 1906
the cane sugar area was 24,679 acres.
In 1907 it was 20,601 acres, and a further
decline Is expected for 190S. This fall
ing off In the acreage devoted to sugar
cultivation is. to a large extent, attri
buted to the superior attractions of dairy
farming.
The International agreement for the
policing of Macedonia has degenerated
Into a farce. The officers appointed by
the different nations for the purpose of
protecting life and property and pre
serving peace, however brave and effi
cient they may be, have found that they
have not sufficient power to carry out
their plana or Instructions. Everv f-
fort tliy make to suppress riots falls for
lack of aupport by the Turkish troops
assigned to help them. The Turkish civil
nd military authorities evidently con
done or encourage every act of lawless
ness perpetrated against the Macedonians.
The International agreement will not
amount to anything until tho powera in
terested back up their plans of reform
with a sufficient body of troops or con
stabulary to enforce the orders of the
district rulers.
Doesn't Mean Clararettes.
Kansas City Star.
The physical director of Columbia uni
versity finda that among the students
smokers are healthier than those who do
not use tobaco. Columbia Is going tp be
responsible for some more of these
sprightly aged people who on their 101st
birthday anniversary attribute their
longevity to the fact that they have al
ways drank three cupa of strong coffeo.
smoked seven pipes and used snuff thirteen
times a day.
Severity of the Strtaareary.
Washington Herald.
Who can dobut that hard times are upon
up, when the wife of a waiter In a well
known New York restaurant compl ilns that
alie la having to practice the moat rigid
economy in order to keep within her weekly
allowances ef M for clotbea?
To the woman who fcakes,
Royal is the greatest of
time and labor savers.
Makes home baking easy
a pleasure-and a profit!
MM
a4
The only O&king, Pomler toade
from Royal GfKpe Qre&za of Tartar
With minimum trouble and cost bis
cuit, cake and pastry are made fresh,
clean and greatly superior to the ready
made, dry. abxmdinme-Ghop variety.
, A r!l;
POLITICAL DRIFT.
The Knox presidential boom Is not en
tirely dead: It is still sending out circu
lars. In the event that Uncle Joe Cannon
misses it this year there will be other
years and Uncle Joe Is still young.
Governor Hugties. his friends figure now,
will have at least 146 votes on the first bal
lot in the Chicago convention. Necessary
to a choice. 497.
There Is an effort to prolong the discus
sion of Senator J. Ds.vls' remarks suf
ficiently to keep him from feeling that his
lame needs another boost.
Mr. Bryan has never flourished a big
stick, but democracy recognises him with
more or less reluctance as tho man who
controls the "O. K." stamp.
Governor Hughes Is reported to have
Welsh, Irish, Scotch, English and Dutch
blood In his veins. But, best of all, he has
good American brains In his head.
We can hardly keep from trembling when
we think of the things that would be likely
to happen to those suffragettes If the Brit
ish House of Commons were run by "Uncle
Joe."
Speaker Cannon has been elected a mem
ber of the Society for the Suppression of
Unnecessary Noises. This, perhaps, will
enable "Uncle Joe" to handle Mr. John
Wesley Galnos even more effectively than
usual.
Colonel GoeUials announces that the
Panama canal will bo open for business
January 1, 1915. Hence it will appear to
Ohio republican that even If the colonel
misses It by a few months the opening Is
likely to occur during Taft's second term.
WEEK-END SMILES.
"Tou never can tell," observed Urcle
Allen Sparks, "what lasting results may be
accomplished by an earnest word spoken
at the right time. Many a man has had
the shape of his nose changed for life by
calling another man a liar." Chicago
Tribune.
"Did you' get any of that bargain rib
bon T
"Ves," answered the athletic girl proudly,
"I bucked the line for seventeen yurds."
Washington Herald.
"They say wages are going to be reduce!
all along the line."
"That's too bad. Pretty soon our plumb
ers' helpers won't be making any moro
than a regular army officer." Life.
"He is of the romantic school of poets."
"What are they?"
"The kind that think they have no
troubles as long as they can have groceries
charged." Nashville American.
"Why are you clapping your hands, me
good man?" asked the cook.
"I was trying, madam," anawered Tor
ick Handout, "to give that cup of cawfea
an encore." Washington Herald.
Old Lady (who had Riven the tranin a
nickel) Now, what will you do with It?
Hungry Hobo Waal, ye see. mum. ef I
buy an auto, there ain't enough left to hire
a ahofur. So I guess 111 pet a schooner. I
kin handle that meaclf. Bohemian.
Towne I.UHchman Is trouhled a great deal
by hla wlfe'a insomnia.
Hrowno I dldn t Know that before. .
Towne Yes, she usually has a severe at-
tack of It every night when he comes In
late and then the trouble begins. tiilla
delphlu Prcaa.
Betty That case haan't come on yet.
Isn't the law's delay maddening?
C'isale (absent-mindedly) Perfectly frlpht.
ful! I've been six months getting that
young barrister to proiose I London Opin
ion. Mr. Shvboy It's very cheerful within, but
very dismal without.
Miss Ketcnem witnoui wnair
Mr. Shvbov Why crer without you.
of course, dearest girl. Arkansas Demo
crat. Ms he a great doctor?"
'Well, his patients are always at the
head of the procession." Nashville Ameri
can. Roa-ers There'a Gregg over there. I d
like to catch hia eye.
Randall Well, here! Talte my umnrein.
Teacher What is the future of "I love."
Lulu?
Chicago Maid I divorce. The Bohemian.
"How's Vas.ar fixed for ba. ball the
coming season?"
'I'oorly. I hear their star pitcher has
gotten the slim craze, and lost al her
curves." Kansas City Journal.
Harper'a Weekly.
How did Jones man an his money?
"Judicious speculation." "And how dd
for Sprains,
Bruises, Cuts
andBirms,use
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There was never anything made
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Brown lose his fortune?" "Dabbling 'n
stocks." Cleveland Leader.
First Artist They tell me Gaybov has
gone to the had. Another case of ex
travagance, I suppose.
Second Artist Not exactly; twins and
doctor bills, I believe. Chicago News.
SfHlXi IS COMING.
B. B. Kiser in Chicago Record-Herald.
Spring Is coming, we may know It by the
willow s golden gleam.
By the old familiar longing to sit down In
peace to dream;
Spring is coming, we may know It by the
ehrieking of the Jay
And the smith winds that are Mowing out
of gardens far away.
Spring is coming, wo may ' know It by the
sunsets, warm' and ml.
By the soft and gentle cooing of the doves
upon the shed;
Spring Is oomlng, we muy know It by the
lilac's swelling bud
And the yelling of tho teamster who Is
driving through the mud.
Spring is coming, spring Is coming, let us
bravely otlng to hope.
There will soon he dandelions gleaming on
the distant slope;
Spring Is coming, we msy know It by the
loud appeals they make
Who live down along the rivers when tho
Ice begins to break.
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16th aad Songlaa Bta.
i
