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About The daily Nebraskan. ([Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-current | View Entire Issue (Nov. 5, 1991)
Opinion ^^^.—■ . i jj -LETTERS^ EDITOR Professor asset to university After reading Professor Joyce A. Joyce’sgucst opinion (“UNL basking in mediocrity,” DN,Oct. 29)and Rich Ervins’ letter (“Professor shows con tempt for students, their ideas,” DN, Nov. 1), I thought it only fair that I write this letter in support of Joyce. In the second semester of the 1990 91 school year, I took Joyce’s class in black women authors. It was one of the best educational experiences that I have had at this university, espe cially in the English department. Not only did I read some of the best litera ture ever written, but I was also granted a chance to see the world through someone else’s eyes, a chance I don’t normally get in my other classes. I wrote in my evaluation of Joyce that I believed that the class should be made a general requirement for all students because Joyce provides knowledge that students need and don’t always get. I think it is also important that I say that I am a white male student and in no way was I ever threatened or made fun of in class discussions, which I participated in quite often. I think lhal what has happened to Joyce is a perfect example of how our educational system runs. The object of the game is to “get ‘em through.” Whether they get an actual education or not*, I guess, comes second. Noth ing has been achieved by these stu dents passing this class except that they have taken another step toward graduation without the education lhal they pay for and deserve. The last point lhal I would like to make is, what right docs anyone have to regrade the tests that Joyce gave to her students? Docs that person know exactly what she was looking for in her questions? I sec this as a direct abuse of Joyce’s rights. Joyce is an incredible asset to this university and to the English depart ment. I hope that the inexcusable actions lhal were taken against her in no way jeopardize her wanting to slay at this university. It would be a ter rible loss of a tremendous professor and an education lhal wc both need and deserve. Patrick Piper junior advertising -LETTER POLICY The Daily Nebraskan welcomes brief letters to the editor from all readers and interested others. Letters will be selected for publi cation on the basis of clarity, origi nality, timeliness and space avail able. The Daily Nebraskan retains the right to edit all material submit ted. Readers also arc welcome to sub mit material as guest opinions. Whether material should run as a let ter or guest opinion, or not to run, is left to the editor’s discretion. Letters and guest opinions sent to the newspaper become the property of the Daily Nebraskan and cannot be returned. Anonymous submissions will not be considered for publication. Let ters should include the authors name, year in school, major and group affiliation, if any. Requests to withhold names will not be granted. Submit material to the Daily Ne braskan, 34 Nebraska Union, 1400 R St., Lincoln, Neb. 68588-0448. VfcU. KT \j4E- CKH Sfcfc VMKS^'S U? TO / ._^— -» ^ ***■ IfA&uiA rMrcos l KTE. .®Ui.T ?fc\9 I r \ sMrOX RSVUP?*Mfc | l NA'HOMfcu tACMfcW. \ \--4r BARY LONGSINE Supposed epidemic not seen Some years ago in a dormitory that shall remain nameless, I randomly was assigned a truly offensive roommate. Without going into loo much de tail, I’ll just say that intolerant, brain dead and violent are three adjectives that could be applied fairly. Faced with the unpleasant poten tial of living an entire semester with this monster, I gave some thought to the control that I had over my situ ation. I didn’t want to move out be cause the only rooms left on campus were on the noisiest floor of the row diest dorm. Besides, the housing department doesn’t like to let people move just because they don’t like their roommate. You need a good reason. So, I thought, if I don’t want to move, I need to give him a good reason. 1 bought candles, some white sand, a rubber chicken and some fake blood. Then I went to the library and checked out the most outrageous books on the occult that I could find and left them lying open on my desk and bed. I wore an upside-down cross as a necklace for a week, kept the rubber chicken carefully hidden, alternately played Mozart’s “Requiem” and the soundtrack from "The Omen” and waited. Then Saturday night came. The Victim always went out drink ing and always came home between 1:20 and 1:40 a.m. At 1, I made a pentagram with white sand on the floor in the middle of the room, lit a candle at each comer and hung the rubber chicken — smeared with fake blood — from the ceiling. I stripped to a pair of shorts and sat in the middle, with fake blood on my hands, neck and face. The final touch was the satanic tape. It was actually a recording of a poem, read aloud from a Latin trans lation of Biblical poetry. The English translation begins “Your belly is like a heap of wheat.” Read in Latin and piped through a reverberation amplifier and an equal izer, this lovely celebration of fertil ity became a spooky thundering echo of Satan. I heard the keys in the door. It opened. "What the ...” On cue, I turned my head to the door. With my best raspy, possessed voice, I wheezed,“GhhectOuuhhht!” He got. Pardon the redundancy if I say he never spent another night in the room and had his things out three days later. The housing department can be very kind, especially to a frightened teen ager who is convinced that his room mate is the right hand of darkness. / wore an upside down cross as a necklace for g week. kept (M rubber chicken carefully . hidden, alternately plaved Mozart’s “Re quiem’’ and the soundtrack from “The Omen’’and waited. People are predictably frightened of the unknown. And, if my experi ence is any indication, it’s not too terribly difficult to take advantage of this fear. Some people carve careers out of this fear, lecturing on the Satan circuit and selling books to large crowds. They claim that Satanism is on the rise in America. They claim that as many as 50,(XX) murders arc commit ted each year in the United States in satanic rituals conducted by as many as 10 million satanists. Where are these millions of Satan ists? There arc fewer than 5 million Mormons,and I’ve met several. There are about 250,000 heroin addicts, and I’ve seen some of them, too. I did meet someone who claimed to be an cx-Satanisl. He was a 16 ycar-old boy, proselytizing on a cor ner downtown with a regular comer Bible thumper. It was Halloween and I was in costume. I was “a hippy, going as an Afghan.” The blanket, not the Asian nationality. As I was walking by, he handed me a pamphlet and said to me eagerly, ‘‘I was a Satan worshiper. I used to bash babies’ heads in and drink their blood.” I said, “Why haven’t you turned yourself and your fellow Satanists over to the police?” and, “Why is it OK for you to be an ex-baby killer and not OK for me to want to a downtown bar on Halloween in cos tume?” and, “Where are all the out raged mothers whose babies you stole for your rituals?” He didn’t really seem to hear me, but anxiously repeated his startling claim and insisted that 1 needed to turn to Jesus. His wide-eyed urgency convinced me. I firmly believe that he thought he was a baby-blood-drinking Satan ist turned to Christ. But 1 still haven’t met an actual Satanist. I did talk to Satan though, that same night. On the way home from the bar, I took a different route and ran into the Church Lady. Church Lady: “Satan! Satan! Yoo hoo! Mr. Satan, could you spare us a moment of your time? I’ve got a serious non-believer here, doesn’t even believe in you. I know you’re busy planning fall fraternity parties and what-not, but you’ve got just as much at stake here as we do.” Satan: (Appearing in the form of George Bums, in a puff of red smoke) “Sure, I’ve got a few moments. I am omnipotent, you know.” Gary: “Uh, thanks, Mr. Satan. It’s good of you to take time off your busy schedule. I’m sure you must be pretty busy with elections coming up and all.” Church Lady: “So tell us, Mr. Satan, how did you gel to be Satan? Is it a job you asked for, were there try-outs or did you just kill the previous devil?” Satan: “Actually, it’s His idea of a joke. I was the first angel to ask, if God is all powerful, can he make a rock so big that he can’t lift it?’ He said, ‘All right, smarty pants, find out for yourself,’ and here lam.” Church Lady: “Hmm ... I sec ... So, you were smarting off in choir practice. Serves you right. Now, about this satanic worship. Tell us about that. Mr. Longsine doesn’t believe there is a rising wave of satanic con spiracy in this country taking over day care centers and rock music. What do you think, Mr. Prince of Dark ness?” Satan: “Well, I generally monitor the writings of Skeptical Inquirer magazine on the topic, as I consider the pursuit of truth to be my greatest enemy. It says that the FBI statistics pretty clearly rule out thousands of secret satanic murders. But really, I don’t understand why I get all this great press. “The other day, I saw a speaker on campus who claimed there was a correlation between drug activity and Satanism. Maybe so. There is iso a definite overlap between drug activ ity and college. Do I get credit for college, too? 1 don’t want it, thanks.” Longsine is a senior international affairs and economics major and a Daily Nebraskan columnist.