Disappointment forgotten j
Ovation greets Devaney
tux J:.k s -
WITH MAX SHULMAN
( IA anlAor tf Roll ftirnxi (At Flag. Boyt . . . Oow Olll't . . . tc.i
The Beard of Avon
Some English teachers insist that Shakespeare couldn't possibly
have written the plays attributed to him because the plays are so full
of lofty poetry and he was but the son of an ignorant country butcher.
"Faugh!" say I. What does being a butcher have to do with
poetry? It so happens that my own butcher, Wally J. Sigafoos, who
never went past third grade has written some of the loveliest poems I
ever saw exquisite things like "Hail to thee, blithe suet" and "Prime
ribs do not a pot roast make" and "How do I weigh thee? Let me count
the thumbs" and many, many others, too numerous to list here, in
cluding "La belle ham sans merci" and "They're hanging Danny's
cleaver in the morning" and "Look on my rump, ye mighty, and despair."
I am pleased to say that Mr. Sigafoos will publish a slim volume of his
verse next spring, called "No Man Is a Brisket." Watch for it.
So let's have no more snide allegations that genius is confined to
the upper classes. In fact, the greatest genius the world has ever known,
Isaac Newton, was the son of a humble second baseman. (Not only
humble, but also unemployed because baseball didn't get invented till
a hundred years later.) But these lowly origins didn't stop Newton
from making his great discoveries, culminating of course in the third
law of motion : "For every action there is an opposite and equal reaction."
How true and eloquent these words still are! Take, for example,
Miller High Life Beer. Have a sip of Miller; that's the action. Now
what is the reaction? Pure pleasure, that's what. Pleasure, delight,
contentment, chuckles, twinkles and wreathed smiles. And why such
a happy reaction? Because you started with such a happy beer!
Miller drinkers know their beer is gloriously unique. There simply
is no other like it. How can there be? For more than 115 years Miller's
marvelous brewing formula has been a secret known to only one man
in the entire world Miller's chief brewmaster and believe me, there
is absolutely no way to sweat the secret out of him. Not only is the
formula written in an unbreakable code, but it is also written in in
visible ink! Aud don't think you can make the invisible ink visible by
using heat; it so happens the formula is written on an ice cube.
But I digress. Shakespeare's most important play is, of course,
Hamlet or, as it is sometimes called, A Midsummer's Macbeth. This
play tells in living color the story of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark, who
one night sees a ghost upon the battlements. (Possibly it is a goal he
sees; I have a first folio in Shakespeare's own handwriting which frankly
is pretty lousy.) Anyhow, Hamlet is so upset by the sight of this ghost
(or goat) that he stabs Polonius and drowns his fat cousin, Butt Malmsey.
Thereupon the King gets sore and banishes Hamlet to a leather factory,
hollering, "Get thee to a tannery!" Thereupon Ophelia refuses her food
till Laertes gets sore and sends her to a restaurant, hollering, "Get
thee to a Deanery !" Ophelia gets sore too, but she has nobody to holler
at except her little dog whom she chases out of the castle, crying,"Out,
damned Spot!" She is arrested and fined twenty farthings for cussing,
but Portia, in an eloquent plea, gets the sentence reduced to life im
prisonment. Thereupon King Lear and his three daughters, Patti,
Maxine and Laverne, wishing to restore peace in the realm, decree a
'day of feasting and squat tag. Everybody has a perfectly splendid time
till Hamlet returns disguised as Banquo's ghost (or goat). Well, nat
urally they all get sore when they see Hamlet and pretty soon there is
a whacking big fight in which Hamlet kills whoever is around. Finally
Hamlet is himself killed by Brer Bodkin, the preacher.
The play ends with the little dog Spot reciting these immortal
lines as he digs a grave for Hamlet:
Thou wouldst, if couldM, undo thy wrontn, poor Dane,
Thou wouldst recall thy blows and take thy kicks back.
For now thou knowtt that he who would hit friends retain
Should stab them not, but buy instead a Miller Six-pack.
Yea and verily. A nd tarry not, good friend, for once thou triest Miller
High Life, the Champagne of Beers, thou' It scorn to change thy slalt with
kings! Get thee to a brewery!
by JIM JOHNSTON
Nebraskan Sports Editor
Bob Devaney has been Ig
nored by the American Foot
ball Coaches Association as its
coach of the year. A disap
pointment, no doubt, to
Devaney.
But such disappointments
seem unimportant when one
receives a warm reception as
did Devaney before President
Richard M. Nixon's address at
the NU Coliseum Thursday
afternoon.
Students, faculty members,
regents and members of the
Nebraska legislature paid
tribute to the Cornhusker coach
with a standing ovation as he
entered the stage.
''It kind of gets the adrenalin
flowing a little," said Devaney
after the convocation. "The
way the students reacted to the
whole situation meant a lot to
me. They greeted the team as
champions and acted
graciously toward the Presi
dent" Devaney, who has never won
the coach of the year award,
placed fourth in this year's
voting which took place before
post-season bowl action.
Charlie McClendon of
Louisiana State and Darrell
Royal of Texas tied for the
honor this year.
Devaney said he was "a little
disappointed" at not being
named coach of the year. "But
this warm reception really
meant a lot to me. It's great :o
know that you have so many
good people behind you."
Devaney termed President
Nixon's visit to the Nebraska
campus and the presentation of
a plaque to the football team
"the greatest honor ever
bestowed upon the Athletic
Department at the University
of Nebraska
"This means a lot to the
players, to the. University and
to our ccaching staff," con
tinued Devaney.
Devaney, who created more
of a stir in the audience than
did Nixon himself, is in Lincoln
for the first time since
departing for Miami Dec. 24,
1970.
He did not fly back to
Houston Thursday evening for
The end
This is the last issue of The Nebraskan for the semester
barring future Presidential visits. Publication will resume
Feb. 2.
Radio Station
KFOR
and their Co-Sponsors
invite von to attend the
m
KFOR
Bridal Forum
on Wed. February 3rd
7:00 in the evening
at Pershing Auditorium
Please register for your invitation at any of
these Co-Sponsors:
tea Simon t Sent
CfcatOM loflevr Tswn
and Apartments
Powell Jewelers
J. C Penney
Armstrong Farnitoro
Massachusetts Mutual
Life Ins., Co.
Boomers Printing
I.GJL Stores
First National Bank of lineal
LacAe Daerr Wlf ami
Beauty Salon
Tyrrell's Flowers
Congas
Edhelm & Blomgren
Photographers
Esthtr HagL Human
Receptions
Conroy's Bakery Steppes
Lincoln Tour and Travel
Program Music Courtesy of Dietze Music House
the banquet. "I'm just going to
stay here and get to work,"
explained the Husker coach.
And that's just what he did.
Devaney went immediately to
his office in the Coliseum
following the speech by the
President "We have a lot of
work to do," smiled Devaney.
"And, besides, the President
instructed that now we have to
do the same thing next year."
And there will be a next year
for Bob Devaney and his
Cornhuskers. That notion of
President Nixon's that Devaney
should run for public office in
the state was quickly tossed
aside.
"That's not what I'm going to
do and I have never had any
aspirations to do so." Football
is Bob Devaney's life.
And, despite the vote by the
Football Coaches Association,
Nebraskans greatly honored
their No. 1 coach at the
Coliseum Thursday after
noon. It was a great tribute a
tribute meaning more than any
vote by the nation's coaches
could come close to matching,
ching.
Prokop
can be
Regent,
resident
Regent Robert Prokop was
informed Wednesday that he
can legally continue to serve as
a resident at the University
Medical Center while serving
as a Regent
An opinion furnished by
Warren C. Johnson of the
University's law firm said the
Nebraska Constitution does not
prohibit him from holding both
positions because his employ
ment at the Medical Center
preceded his election to the
Board of Regents.
The only limitation, ac
cording to Johnson, relates to
the code of ethics for Regents
which says in part that no
member of the Regents shall
have substantial financial or
personal interest in business
transactions of the Uqiversity
without disclosure of such in
terests. Since Prokop's Medical
Center salary is constant, it is
unlikely that any financial
transactions would occur ac
cording to the opinion.
Education reform
leaflet circulated
A leaflet is being circulated
on campus to find out the ex
tent of student dissatisfaction
with the educational system at
the University.
The leaflet asks students who
support educational reform to
write their names, address and
phone number on the bottom of
the leaflet and send it to the
Education Reform Office, 345
Nebraska Union.
PAGE 6
THE NEBRASKAN
FRIDAY, JANUARY 15, 1971
