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The NoriOlk Wwkly Nevis-Journa
The NWH. . EstabllBhcd 1881.
The Journal , Established 1877
THE HUSE PUBLISHING COMPANY
W. N. IIuse N. A. Husu ,
President. Secretary
t3 ery Friday. Ily mall per year , Jl.fiO
Entered at the poHtolIlce at Norfolk
Neb. , an second class matter.
Telephones : Kdltorlal Departmen
No. 22. Business Olllce and Job Rooms
No. II 22.
The hobble skirt goeth before a fall
Swat the fly und make the worli
healthier.
It will soon be open season for dar
dcllons.
What Mexico needs Is not more re\
olutlons but more BchooHiouseo.
It Is said that llshen yawn. Is It an
wonder , when they look at the llehei
men ?
Spain and France are to co-operat
In Morocco. Goodbye , Morocco , you
time has come.
The baseball umpire's troubles hav
once more commenced , and they ar
not Imaginary ones , either.
The plague In China is Incrcasln
in Its power and extent. Bodies ar
being burned by the thousand.
About every man in Mexico appear
to be an insurgent against the ide
of having anyone else run things.
Jack Johnson has bought an aer <
plane , and now we will see If the p <
lice can stop those black rockets.
Poet Laureate Austin is having trot
ble finding anything to rhyme wit
George the Fifth. He might try Smitl
Fisher's appointment to the cablne
was not due wholly to his Interest 1
conservation. He is a golf enthuslas
also.
Some men who are as deaf as a pos
Tfhen spoken to about charity coul
hear a whisper if asked to take
drink.
One of the Camorrlsts on trial picl
ed out his glass eye and threw it o
the floor. This must have been a
eye-opener.
If tbe democrats have put the pn
ducts of democratic districts on the !
farmers' free list , we have yet to tin
out about it.
The senate will get around to vet
on reciprocity by the time It IB too h (
In Washington to attend the ba
games In comfort.
It is said the acts of congress o
March 4 may be illegal. But the si
preme court says most of their acl
ara Illegal , anyway.
Tbe Illinois hou&e increase the :
pay from $2,000 to $3G60. They ha\
got to have some way of living b
tween senatorial elections.
About 12,000 people attended tl
first league ball games. Our peopl
are still firmly supporting the bu
warkfl of national greatness.
Reciprocity seems likely to pas
and business men along the horde
can deliver goods by train instead <
through the woods on dark nights.
A news item says the elk have su
fered from the frosts of winter. Tt
elks that we are acquainted with seei
to have come through in tine shape.
You can not found an enduring r
public among an Ignorant and Indltfe
ent people. Seventeen only out <
every 100 Mexicans can read or writ
The airship Parseval landed in
swamp over In Germany , Friday , at
the passengers must have been glc
tor a good squshy place to Jump Int
New York City has finally decide
to tear up all its horse-car lines. Ma
be tbe old town will be having ele
trie lights and telephones one of thei
Second Impressions are very like
to be more correct and just than , fir
ones. Considering this fact , wouldi
it be safer to have only second Irapre
slons ?
It takes a brave man to meet r
Increasing waist line without a pr
test , and one must cultivate chrlstlt
resignation to accept gray hairs In
proper spirit
The amount of land which is bell
drained and reclaimed in Florida u
der tbe Broward plan Is equal In ante
to Rhode Island , Connecticut and D <
aware combined.
The trade reports say the volun
of business is below producing c
pacity. Like the rest of us , Uncle Sa
hates to dig In the garden when tl
fish begin to bite.
Carter Harrison's boom for the prc
idency is tbo smallest one to be foui
on the political horizon with the e
ccption of the ono launched for VI
President Sherman.
Everyone IB asking why Ambn
pailor Hill retlgned. Perhaps ho Is '
tired of having American tourists nsV
him to go down to the station am
ht'lp get their luggage off.
Secretary Hitchcock Is beginning
to discover that the statesmen of this
country are In favor of economy Ir
the pofctolllce department but radicallj
opposed to Its enforcement.
Champ Clarl ; has no time for th <
automobile. Nothing like being on * o
the common people. The trouble wltl
the most of them Is that they havi
neither time or money for one.
Nine hundred thousand books an
being moved into Now York's nev
Ibrary , and April breezes may reinovi
the dust which Manhattan's citizen :
allow to gather on the classics.
A St. Louis judge decides a womai
has a right to hang a cowbell on th
door to tell when her husband gets in
It would be a good thing for some nici
to have it hung around their neck.
Pittsburg again appears in the naui
old role but with a brand new scan
dal. Once more the smoky city 1
hunting out the grafters for whlcl
due honor ought to be given to It.
Someone having forgotten to get i
supply of tobacco for a Norweglai
ship just arrived at Boston , the cre\
chewed leather. These men nov
know what boarding house life is.
Just as the small boy likes to ge
behind a sedate citizen before firini
rocks , so tbe Mexican insurrectos ar
careful to back up to the Unltei
States line before letting oft thei
guns.
A New York Central train mad
three miles in a minute and fifty-on
seconds the other day. Some of ou
automobiles will feel badly under th
disgrace of being left a notch or tw
behind.
They are separating church an
state in Portugal. As the mlnlste
can no longer be policeman , the ter
dency of the American boy to stan
on his head in Sunday school wl !
soon be observed.
Mexican investments looked golde
a few years ago. But under preset )
circumstances , we'd rather have ou
money In the old country savings ban1
with its antique ledgers and obsolet
furniture and single clerk.
If the Sanborn decision Is upheld b
the United States supreme court I
will be found that the authority of th
interstate commission has been fo
nially extended over practically a
the railroad rates of the country.
If it took thirty women eightee
hours to count 1,100 ballots cast b
the Daughters of the American Rei
elution , how much before July 4 wi !
we get the result of presidential elei
tion when women hold the offices ?
Professor AJtken of Lick observi
tory says the canals on Mars are notl
ing but earthquake fissures. It woul
be mighty disappointing to wako u
some morning and find the sweet pen
had dropped down to the center c
the planet.
A fad prevails among the fashioi
able women of Berlin for having thei
portraits painted while they slee ]
Most of us look stupid enough awjvk (
let alone our sleeping expression , c
lack of it Besides , what if a snoi
should be transferred to the canvas ?
The American boys who have bee
brought up on Patrick Henry's p ;
triotlc speeches will be interested t
learn that a bronze tablet In memo :
of the eloquent orator has been place
in St. John's church , Richmond , wher
his famous "Liberty or Death" speec
was delivered.
A pretty custom has long prevaile
at Vassar of selecting twenty-four <
the prettiest girls In the college t
carry the long daisy chain in the cor
mencement festlvites. This year's 6
lection of bearers shows that no staler
or section has a monopoly of femlnlt
beauty. The students chosen repr
sent ten different states scatter *
from Connecticut to California an
also the Philippine islands.
Seattle has a council of nine met
bers , men who must devote their e :
tire time to the affairs of that clt
and they are paid a good salary-
$3,000 each. This Isn't a commlsslc
form of government , but a modlflc
tlon or a compromise between tt
.commission and the old form of go
ernment. The Idea of reducing tl
number of aldermen is one of sen :
and economy. It is becoming appn
ent to tbo people that it Is not nece
sary to have a large board of aide
men to conduct the affairs of a city.
Within the past few weeks tv
young physicians gave up their llvi
as a result of contracting dlseasi
which they were trying to Investiga
and discover the cause and cure. Tl
world holds no greater heroes the
these conscientious medical men wl
In laboratory or sick room often lei
their lives in an effort to enlarge tt
boundaries of medical science and d
liver their fellowmen from the fear
death. The world docs not fully a
predate the heroic sacrifice of a Ree
a Brenkerhoff or an Ashley , but th <
have the quiet approval of their pr
fcssional brothere and the consclou
ness of having done their utmost for
Immunity.
Thirty long term prisoners in the
Kansas City , Kan. , workhouse are to
be given garden lots this pprlng in a
four-acre tract adjoining the work
house , says the Kansas City Star.
They will bo allowed to work In the
gardens after working a certain num
ber of hours each day on the stone
pile. The prisoners will be allowed
to choose the vegetables and the pro
ducts will be served In the prisoners' '
dlnlngroom. Gardening will not be
compulsory , but the prisoners who do
not work in their gardens will spend
that time breaking stone.
Under the present conditions there
Is no question but that the opening ol
the Panama canal means a larger ln <
crease of commerce for Japan than It
does for the United States. It will
afford the subsidized steamships ol
Jnpau easy access to the Atlantic and
a shorter route to the eastern coast
of South America. Even If our commerce
merco Is Increased in Asia the Inter
change would be very largely carried
in Japanese bottoms. Japan is des
ttncd to wax fat off the trfl.de across
the Pacific just as England has ac
quired riches and honor from roonopo
llzlng the trade of the Atlantic.
M'NAMARA'S KIDNAPING.
A new sensation has developed it
the dynamiting case , in the sending tc
jail of three men at Indianapolis
charged with kidnaping McNamam
and taking him out of the state with
out duo process of law. This action
however , was hardly as unfair as the
method by which McNamara was ar
rested and spirited out of Indiana
without opportunity to employ coun
sel or resist requisition. Such unfair
ness on the part of the men who ar
rested the union leader , could onlj
work against their case and as r
means of creating sympathy for Me
Namara.
The readiness of Mr. Meyer ant
some other labor leaders to declare
the entire arrest a frame-up , includ
Ing the planting of dynamite in Me
Namara's headquarters , is as unrea
sonable as it would be to declare that
because the men have been arrested
they are guilty. It IB a good time U
keep calm and wait for the real evl
dence in the case before venturinj
cocksure opinions either way.
THE TIMES CASE.
If the detectives have the guilts
parties under arrest in connectloi
with the Los Angeles Times dyna
mite outrage , which cost the lives o
twenty-one men , the people of tb <
United States may well draw a slgl
of relief , and at the same time join ii
the hope that speedy and sure justice
may be meted out.
Details of tie conspiracy which !
alleged to have been carried out b ]
members of a structural builders' la
bor union , make it one of the mos
appalling crimes in the history of thli
nation , if the accusations advance !
are correct.
It was vigorously denied by officiali
of the American Federation of Labor
at the time of the explosion , tha
union labor was in any way respon
sible for the outrage at Los Angelei
and the officers and members of labo
unions In general will undoubtedly b <
as much surprised and shocked by thi
startling disclosures recently made , ' a ;
other private citizens. Most of then
will realize that if the men under ai
rest are really guilty , a serious blov
to the canse of union labor has beet
dealt by the murderous wretches whi
have wrecked property worth million
of dollars and taken many lives , li
their unfair methods of warfare.
The accused men should have ever ;
chance to prove their innocense. Thi
size of tbe reward mokes it necessary
to take extra precaution to make sun
that evidence submitted , is truetwoi
thy. If they are guilty , their punlsl
ment should be so serere as to etani
out as a warning that civilized socJet ;
won't etanel for dynamite In politics
or economical arguments.
POPULARIZING THE RECORD.
A determined effort Is being madi
by some of the congressmen to mak
the Congressional Record a real newt
paper. They have the idea that i
periodical that purports to be a recon
should not be a work of fiction.
They think it should no longer lool
like any other old government reporl
those funereal black bound document
that scare awny readern by a forbid
ding impenetrability. Rather the ;
would like to have It a real story o
actual debates.
Almost any visitor to Washingtoi
feels he IB repaid by spending conslc
erable time In congress. But fei
people feel that they are repaid fo
time over reports padded with dea
wood , which are circulated as a suj
posed record of these discussions an
doings.
When congress lets a member prin
in the Record a speech that it is no
willing to spend time to hear , It I
hardly likely that the public wl !
speid time In perusing it. And wore
of all the limitless freedom give
members to print Jong extracts fret
favorite books scares away the pul
He , which does not want to have It
reading selected by tbo political fad
of congressmen.
The real debates In congress ar
full of human Interest. They rin
with the clash of personal , polltlca
sectional forces. They are n thrillln
and often dramatic epitome of th
progress of political thought. To get
people interested in them , It Is merely
necessary to have it a real and not n
falto report.
The mqre people read about con <
gU'sslonal doings , the more Intolll
gent UTdlct we get on public matters
The iinproxeuicnt of the Record con
sequently Is a question where the pub
He Interest Is sharply offset agalnsl
the vanity of members , and againsl
thi'ir desire to get long-winded lllus
tratlotih of their oratory In the hands
of the \oters under a goverumenl
frank.
AN AMERICAN CATHEDRAL.
The fourth largest cathedral of the
world was conbocratcd Wednesday ai
Mornlngbide nights , In upper Man
hattan.
Much of the' spirit of self sacrifice
with which tbo medieval cathedral :
of Europe were1 built has appeared It
connection with this church of St
John tbo Divine. One poor seamstrcst
gives $5 a year to it , and a dozen olc
men in a church home earned $250 bj
making nets and hammocks ,
People sometimes wonder why bun
dreds of thousands of Americans gc
to Europe every year , while outsldi
of business men and immigrants , onlj
hundreds come this way.
The answer Is that every slzabl (
town in Europe has been trying foi
1,000 years to secure and preserve
fine buildings , which while not rival
Ing New York's magnificent new
church In size , may equal It In poln
of beauty.
The question Is often asked why tin
old workmen of Europe were superloi
to our craftsmen. We build bette :
locomotives , can't we make as gooi
buildings ?
In the old days in Europe nppren
tlces used to work seven years learn
ing everj" part of their art. They wen
kicked and cuffed about the shop !
until they did good work. No mai
became a master workman until h <
submitted a piece of work artistti
enough to get by the head men.
The modern workman seeks firs
for better hour's and pay , and fln <
work Is secondary. He Is to be com
mended for bettering his condition , am
ho is not to blame for the modcn
method that hampers him.
Our modern system of industry re
duces him to a machine by limitin )
him to the performing of some on <
little function. In the old days then
was no such sub-division of labor , am
tbe artisan's Intelligence was devel
oped by doing all parts. Our moden
method Is as if a. man tried to develo ]
his physique by exercising one arm.
It Is time to think more about hai
monious and beautiful public build
ings.
THE D'A R TERS
The stirrings of martial anccstr ;
and traditional scrappinebs of th
Daughters of the American Revolu
lions have again been manifested thi
week at the continental congress a
Washington.
A verbal harpoon was thrown inti
the ranks of the so-called "insurgents' '
when Mrs. Mathew Scott , president
general , described the campaign for i
rival candidate as "paltry , pitiful am
personal. "
The president tried in vain to pou
the "Taft bmlle" over the troublei
waters. His prediction that the peac
movement would succeed in Influcnc
Ing the cfo'uncils of the Daughters wa :
received with laughter. It evident ! ;
looked to them as If it would be easle
to wash the war paint off the flghtlni
chieftains of Europe.
In the seclusion of their home cit
cles , tbe Daughters are very calm am
self contained persons. They givi
scrumptious social functions , at whlcl
graceful women distribute refrest
ments In heirlooms of colonial china
with tbe stateliness of an old Urn
minuet They wad papers of Hterar ;
distinction about' , the second cousin
of George Washington's great auntf
They may rarely be persons o
greattVcaUti. " ' There is not much blu
blood In the Insurgent democracy o
modern industrialism , in which th
prizes are apt to be won by raw son
of tbe soil who have had to climb b ;
their own original powers , rather tha :
by the virtues of their predecessors
But the Daughters have been all th
more attractive , on account of a cci
tain aloofness from the new rlc
crowd. In their circles , standard
other than dollars have taken con
mand , an Isolation from the drift o
the times-that is thrice-welcome.
They have also done fine work fo
patriotic Instruction. They hav
sought to develop no undlscrimlna
ing adoration of flags and symbol !
but have tried for practical ends Ilk
teaching newly arrived aliens tbe fut
damental principles of good cltlzci
ship.
Serving so useful a function In ou
society , wo all readily forgive thcr
any little pet foibles. If they get thei
fun by bellicose , conventions , If th
spirit of belligerent.sires Is relncni
nated in their scrappy meetings , wh
can deny them their favorite recres
tlon ?
ARBOR DAY SUGGESTION ,
that tree planting time ha
come ; let 'those who have planted o
are about to plant , give more Urn
and attention to the new trees tha
merely setting them out. Much of ou
tree energy In this country Is waste
because it all IB spent In tbe one at
of setting out the new tree , wlthoi
ever giving further care and attentio
to tree dexelopment. Many of tin
trees set out are carelessly sclectei
and give poor results ,
From the oak , walnut , elm , maple
ash , birch and a few others , splcndli
choice of trees for this climate run
soil Is to bo had. Care should bo tak
en that the trees bo set out not to
close together and where grown one
already stand too close together , the ;
should bo thinned out In order to glv
best results.
Trees with plenty of little root
should be selected for planting ; an
foliage up on the trunk should ho ou
off , fo that the roots may get th
benefit of all the nourishment th
ground gives , without having to d
vide w'lth tbe foliage. And plenty n
water should bo given tbo roots.
Farmers in this climate must bcgi :
to raise trees with which to provld
their own fence posts , as Is done I
European countries The scarcity c
lumber might even make It profltabl
for them to plant forests for the us
of their children and their grandchl
drcn , in building homes and barns.
Nothing is more desolate lookln
than a farm without a tree upon ii
and those trees that are on the fan
should be given care and attention I
order to allow them to ajjaln thei
maximum value In strength and beat
ty. It is not enough merely to se
them out and trust to nature for th
rest.
rest.And
And speaking of trees , one New
reader has suggested that samlj
waste land , not now good for laisln
any crops.might very readily be pn
to real use if planted to fir trees. O
the'stretches of waste sandy land , no' '
called blowouts , valuable llr forest
could be produced , It is pointed ou
in the course of a comparatively fe <
years.
AROUND TOWN.
You can plant us. That c I
still hanging around. And the enl
way to get rl'd of a cold is to kii
tbo patient.
No. hold on. Twenty-four mor
hours is granted before the plan
Ing , In order to give one more chanc
for surrender. ( We'd like just on
more golf game one more chance t
come back. )
A golf stick is better medicine fo
a cold than a typewriter , anyhow.
How's the new tree doing ?
Another sign that spring IS here
Mr , Brown has left the automatic tell
phone company's employ and Mr. Vi <
let has taken his place. When brow
goes and violet comes , it'si lg
that simply cannot be overlooked.
Got your May baskets ready ? Pleas
put candy in ours.
This notice is given far enough 1
advance that there need be no mil
understanding.
We'll never forget the one we gi
a year ago and NEVER , NEVE :
will forget the candy that was in i
Wo tried for six months afterward t
forget It ; but failed.
Norfolk is getting to be some coi
ventlon burg. With 400 threbherme
from all over Nebraska and 125 Wi
men's club women from this distrlc
there'll be things doing during th
coming week. In fact , hardly a wee
goes by nowadays but that there
some convention in town , and we'r
getting more and more all the while.
WHEN :
will the Union Pacific keep it
promise to build that new Norfolk di
pot ?
will Norfolk get a hospital ?
will Mrs. Hoxscy arrive at Atkii
son ?
will the supreme court hand dow
the sugar and tobacco trust decisions
will Mellette county open ?
will we get more paving ?
a bogey score bo made ?
that grass seed come up ?
But what's the use of making a hi
gey score this year , , anyhow ? There' '
no $10 hung up.
If you ever have had a cold sore th
size of a nickel on your chin , yo
know that It requires skill to a fin
degree , to shave around it.
And incidentally , can you tell wht
happens to the whiskers underneatl
while the cold sore holds the fort ?
Another sign of spring : The sun
mer parasol has appeared.
What's become of the old faehlone
girl who stuck gum under the dlnln
room table during meal time ?
And what's become of the o. f. ma
who used to put curling wax on hi
moustache ?
In fact , what's become of the o.
moustache that was long enongh t
reach clear to the bottom of a cup (
coffee ?
There's this advantage about llvin
in the same town with one's father
When your supply of six dozen bam
kerchiefs is exhausted in six days , yo
can fall back on father's supply fc
the seventh day , until your own hav
gone through the washtub.
Won't there ever be opportunity t
bring this confounded Furnace Go
season to a formal close ?
A year ago now we were all dlpp
over what was going to happen , an
what wasn't going to happen , at Rem
All wrong , too.
Wo don't bee how eye doctors ev
get at th ? true condition of people
eyes. It Is * o natural to exaggorati
one's ailments that the average pet
son , having his eyes tested , tells tin
doctor that he can't see letters on tin
chart which , in reality , he can see a
plain as day. Maybe the eye doctor
are on , and allow for that.
What has become of the o. f. colla
that used to invite a man's necktie ti
ride up to the top , all the way aroum
his neck ?
Not many more days for you , 01
you oyster.
At least one woman had a btirnln
desire to attend the Woman's clul
convention.
If your neighbors got up extra earl ;
yesterday morning , It was becaus
those fifteen thresher engines blo\
their whistles at 7 a. in.
Personally , we had been up so Ion
by that time that wo thought It mus
be the signal for dinner.
ATCHISON GLOBE SIGHTS.
There are plenty of good stcpnaotl
ers , but can they prove It ?
Most men who have made failure
were failures before they started.
Soda water fusses around n goo
deal without accomplishing much.
If a friend does you a favor get ou
of his debt jusfas soon as possible
An old-fashioned woman's Idea c
shiftlessness Is to buy canned soup.
Some men always know what to d
a few minutes after it Is too late t
do It.
A hey Is not necessarily in dee
thought because he scratches hi
head.
So many schemes that look all rlgh
when they are new , don't wear vor
well.
If a healthy hey walks down stain
It Is a sign that the stairs have n
banister.
Girls don't want a home of thei
own as much as they want to ge
married.
Considering the amount of noise I
makes a gasoline engine accomplishe
a good deal.
And there are men who don't g
ahead very fast , even after they ar
sure they are right
When a boy gets his first sweatei
ho can't help feeling that he is a goo
deal of an athlete.
You are a sure enough good felloi
if you can enthuse when there isn' '
anything in it for you.
When a man needs a shave , h
seoini , to need It more than he eve
needed anything else.
Who started the cry that countrj
currd hatn Is so much superior to th
packing house product ?
A man buys a patent cigar Hghte
to show his superiority , rather tha
to save time or matches.
The soit of fame which is thrus
upon a man , is usually recognized a
about its actual value.
Men who have escaped being faugh
are always a little vhosty in the mater
tor of assumed morals.
On the other hand , Lent won't hel
you much If joii try to make up fo
lost time after it is over.
What has become of the old-fas !
ioned man who had never known
"sick day" in his life ?
The drummer may ge a good mus
clan , but he can't expect people t
ask him to play solos.
It takes winter a long time to glv
up the fruit buds and let the worm
have a chance at them.
In a boy's ball team , nearly ever
player secretly believes he Is entitle
to fill the pitcher's box.
One ought to be cheerful , of course
but there is such a thing as being to
noiBy about it
Some men spend more time gettln
r ady to work than they spend worl
ing after they get started.
People hate motorcycles bo muc
they never see one without accusln
it of exceeding the speed limit.
No one who spends much time 1
them ever Beems to have a good wor
to say for the American jails.
You get so little money of all kind !
that the chance of accepting a coui
terfelt needn't worry you much.
Statesmen , unfortunately , are nc
the only ones who think the only wa
to Insure peace Is to fight for It
A fanner , If his farm pays dlv
dends , doesn't have a great deal c
time to devote to the fish industry.
Some men meet an appolntmen
ahead of time so they can loaf a fei
minutes before the other man arrive :
When a young girl marries an ol
man , she doesn't worry much abou
the old man's health unless It is gooi
If a woman can't think of anythln
In favor of her child , she'will tel
how good It is about taking mcdlclm
One trouble about smiling whe
everything goes wrong is that a moll ;
coddle Is nearly always Imposed upoi
Recollections of childhood are ofte
much more pleasant than childhood
I
hood rangH. was when you lived It at close
As u Kntorlnl suggestion , It mny bo
said that thu derby hut wan IICMJT
Intended to ho worn with overalls.
A MR man driving n Shetland pony
mny bo very kind to the uiilnml bill
ho always looks Ilko ho lit Imposing
nn It.
If you don't deliberately do a lot of
things > on know you will bo berry fur
afterward , you are n most umuuiul
person.
Why wasn't the human animal con
structed with a disposition to go to
bed early and get up early , an hi :
bhould ?
Some men go to extremes ; not con
tent with making a phnplo seem u
boll , they Hguro out that It umst ho
n concur.
' " " -y-j < J
-
According to a fnrin boy , If there Jj
wore some way of dodging the ehoroi > ,
the rest of the work wouldn't ruuount ,
to much.
What has become of the old-fash
loncd mother who worried a good deal
for fear gypbies would kidnap her
children ?
You can't blame the dogs for going
to a dog show , hut It would seem that
people could llnd bouiothlng uioro
amusing.
While wo sigh for excitement occa
sionally , news of a new straight away
i coord In : in automobile can't satisfy
thu i-nnlng.
A man who usually Is late getting
to work In the morning Is the employo
most likely to watch the clock for
quitting time.
Regardless of the regulations of the
pure food law , one continues to gut
about the usual amount of strawbnr-
rles for a quarter.
A woman's Idea of a real drouth
sufferer Is herself when the cistern
goes dry on the day she has planned
to wash her head.
Another advantage the woman
possesses is that she doesn't have to
join the Uniform Rank to get a license
to wear a willow plume.
However there is less wear and tear
in keeping > our nose on the grind
stone than in pressing the panels of
the primrose bath.
Every salesman , who works on a
salary , likes to impress you with the
notion that ho could do much bettor
on a commission basis.
A man who marries one girl simply
because another girl of his choice re
fused him , certainly believes in get
ting revenge on himself.
While a barber charges a good dual
for shaving a corpse , one must con
sider the fact that he can't carry on n
conversation with such a customer.
While it is difficult to heat the lin :
of gravity , you may have observed
that the cost of live hogs falls a good
deal faster than the cost of breakfast
bacon.
A dead hero may not appreciate
jour devotion at his shrine , but he
has the advantage over the live one in
that there is less likelihood of the
tune changing.
When children are willing father
should marry again after mother dlcb ,
it is a blgn they don't like to have
him around , and think be needs some
one to take care of him.
If might prevailed as they ay it
used to in the world , and as some
insist It does now , It would be imj E-
sible for a hundred-pound woman to
boss a two hundred-pound man.
A man isn't necessarily disagreeable
jubt because he doesn't happen to
agree with you ; it is when ho insist *
on dwelling on that fact that the new
spring styles In tits are thrown.
If jou are feeling down-hearted , tell
your sad btory to a fat man , and get
him to crying about it. If the learn
rolling down his vast erpaneo of
cheek fall to "make you laugh , you
know where the river is.
There Is also the fool who thinks ho
can get across a grade crossing eigh
teen inches ahead of a locomotive ;
and he frequently stays there , dis
tributed in wild profusion up and
down the right-of-way.
TO WORK ON MADERO.
Spiritualistic Society Is to Send Emis
sary to Rebel Leader.
Mexico City , Mex. , April 2C. Not
withstanding officials continued mute
as to formal acceptance of the armlt-
tico proposals , news that the war de
partment had Issued orders to com
manders in the armistice zone to cease
hostilities , has practically official sanc
tion. Formal instructions were said
to have been sent to all commander ? )
in the affected territory to observe the
requirements of the armistice signed
Sunday.
A new influence is to be brought to
hoar upon Francisco I. Madero , jr. , in
the Interest of peace through the send
ing to San Antonio by the Splrltualls-
tic Society of Mexico of which Madero
Is a member of an emissary In the
person of Rqgell Fernandez Quell ,
Mexican consul in Baltimore.
Guell has been hero for some time
conferring with leaders of the society
and studying with them means for a
re-establishment of peace. A committee -
tee from Jtn membership called upbn
the minister of foreign relations and
was given proper credentials to en
able Guell to reach Madero. Ho de
parted for the north tonight
