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About Valentine Democrat. (Valentine, Neb.) 1900-1930 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 15, 1903)
THE VALENTINE DEMOCRAT I. JH KICE , Publisher. TALENTINE , NEBRASKA. Never answer a fool according to your folly. Lack of interest hi a story Is enough to prove Its truthfulness. The best possible thro\v of dice Is to throw them Into the sewer. Were It not for their vanity It would be Impossible to please some people. A man no more than gets back from his summer vacation than he wants to go a way on a hunting trip. At any rate , Mr. Schwab was very . "successful" until a more "successful' ' man was found to take his place. California regrets to report that she has not prunes enough this year to cre ate trouble hi even the Hungarian Diet. Every Amerncan lady is a queen in her own right. Have you noticed , the ladies' combs ? They begin to look like crowns. After all , the slump In the stock market does not interest so many people ple as the addition of another cent to the price of beef. Perhaps it would be better to let the Eastern college boys harvest the' gar den peas a few seasons before tackling another wheat crop. How -would it do for the nations , be fore fusrtlier increasing their navies , to have a few of the rocks dug out of the oceans , so the boats will have room ? An Eastern mathematical expert an nounces that there over 700,000,000,000 mosquit'tes in existence. Of course , anybody who doubts it is at liberty to verify the count. Elijah Dowie proposes , now that he Is an American citizen , to remodel the American flag. Elijas is apt to find the chariot of fire backed up to his front door almost any morning now. One of the German privy councilors urges young German engineers to visit America and take notes. Young Amer ican englneeers may take this as a hint that they could visit Germany with profit. * The industries of both coun tries have points of excellence which neither should hesitate to copy. The gambler who loses to-day will pawn his watch and gamble again to morrow , and the buyer of a lottery ticket that draws a blank will curse his luck , but buy again. So it is like ly to be with the investors in paper property , and it will be a gain to the speculative but unwary public If the prestige of Morgan and the other en gineers of great combines suffer suffl- 'ciently to rob them of the gift of sorcery cery which has been ascribed to them. A burglar lately released from the New Jersey State Prison has sold for 50,000 the English patent rights for an invention which he made while in confinement. Moreover , his inventive tjenius so Impressed those who came In contact with him that his term was Bhortened by a pardon. It seems a pity that a man of such gifts as this should rake to burglary , . but evidently there ts still some strength of character left , for the man , although his name is Filer , stayed until he was released. The tirade against high heels threat ens to become a crusade if all the phy- eicians are really going to take it up and tell trhat they know of the evil ef fects the stiltlike things now fashion able produce. If these same physicians weren't made of the mettle which we know characterizes them they would just say nothing and chortle with glee at every woman they see scudding along on lifts , thinking of the increase In their practice such a custom means. But with an unselfishness that is good to see , some have come to the front with warnings that the timely and would , If heeded , ward off much suf fering. And the question is , Will they receive the attention they should , these warnings ? A ragtime song catches the popjular fancy. It is hummed and whistled and sung everywhere and by almost every body. Then It Is relegated. The "psy chological moment" comes when the populace tires of it. It Is of no more Importance in the world of song than a last year's bird's nest A jingle of words , cunning phrases , a catchy mi ter and a jagged tune it soon peters out. Now There are ragtime ideals ale - o Ideals that are false and fleeting. JFor Instance : Note the ideals of a boy. How they change. He begins , possibly , "by wanting to be a fireman or a police man. Then he sees the glitter of the circus. His highest ideal Is to wear spangles or jump through a hoop. And so on. Ragtime ideals. Men , too , in- idulge in ragtime ideals. A man wants an office. He gets it. He Is not satis- fled. He wants money. He gets It. lie' learns that there are many things piore important in life thaa money. But The true song never dies. The real Ideals never disappoint. The real Bong , the song that voices and reaches the best and deepest and highest that Is In us , will always be sung" . The true Ideal will always lead to satisfaction , knd happiness , and peace. We ought ko be able to make "life and that vast eternity one grand , sweet sonc. " .We would if we were not always taking up with ragtime ideals. Reports have It that a certain school of technology confers on women who complete the course in household sci ences the degree of "Bachelor of Sci ence hi Dcmestic Engineering. " Al though some American institutions have been charged with conferring de grees too bountifully and carrying aca demic distinctions to hasty extremes no one will object to this new variety of degree a variety of the sort that gives spice to life. In human values the "bachelor of science in domestic engineering" holds the most important position in the world. What is the mere bridge builder or the naval 'archi ' tect to the engineer in the kitchen solv ing the chemical problems of hot bread and making geometric cakes V Food is the fundamental thing In life , and the home is the basis of the state. Consid er , too , how dignified It would be for a man to ask a woman to be his do mestic engineer , with the implication that she be a "civil" engineer , as Avell. The toil of the household takes on a new aspect. The wife is no longei cook , but chemist , with a kitchen lab oratory. Hir education , especially her "original research , " goes on after she leaves schopl just the continuity that educators recommend. If the young wife of 2-2 is "Bachelor of Science , " her mother shouldbe a candidate for the honorary degree of "Master of Science in Domestic Engineering. ' ' She is like the self-made , experienced bridge builder who has not had a col lege education. And for grandmother , nothing will do but the highest hon orary degree. Just as universities honor men who have made their inai'k , even if they are not college gradu ates , so grandmother should be sum moned to the university on commence ment day , dressed in academic gown and lace cap , and be made a D.D.E. , "Doctor of Domestic Engineering. ' " Many financiers are sounding the alarm over the fast decreasing margin between profit and loss from the opera tion of American railroads. According to the Financial Chronicle , reports of lailroad earnings thus far received for the year ending June 30 , 1003. are of a character to warrant the conclusion that any further increase in expenses or decrease in transportation rates would threaten the financial soundness of the railroads. In support of this contention figures are taken giving comparison between the Vanderbilt lines for the first six months of 19)2 ) and of 1903. They show that the in crease in gross earnings of the Vander bilt group of six roads for this peiiod was $10,987- ! and the increase in ex penses $10,693,700 , leaving only $2:3- : 791 as margin of profit. The principle is well established in railroading that expenses do not increase proportionate ly to the revenue , but should follow a descending scale per unit. It is ar gued that if an increase of nearly $11- 000,000 does not add more than $250- 000 to the general fund , it is clearly shown that a small decrease in traffic would have a serious effect. Taken in connection with present conditions in the transportation world , these figures and the conclusion drawn from them would seem peculiarly significant. Cost of railroad materials and equipment has increased since 1S9S on an average of nearly 50 per cent. Labor organiza tions have succeeded in advancing wages to the high-water mark , thereby adding many millions to the expense side of the railroad ledger. Only the constantly increasing volume of traffic has enabled the railroads to earn good profits , and this increase cannot con tinue forever. In over twenty States there is agitation which has for its purpose increased railway taxation and decreased freight rates. It is apparent , therefore , that a general increase in freight rates would meet with deter mined opposition. If the financiers are right regarding the margin be tween profit and loss , it is evident that the roads should be making careful preparations now for the lean years that usually follow a period of extraor dinary business activity. Mystery of Wild Animals. "The forest has many mysteries , " said an old woodsman , "but none deep er than that of wild animals that die natural deaths. The four-footed dwel lers of the woods certainly do not live forever. Age and disease must carry them off regularly , but what be comes of their bodies ? I never heard of anyone coming across a wild bear or deer or wildcat or fox that had died from natural causes. I found the car cass of a big five-pronged buck in the woods once , but a rattlesnake , also dead , had buried its fangs in one of the deer's nostrils. There had evi dently been a fight to the death be tween the reptile and the beast. "I have many times found other dead animals in the woods , but never one that did not show unquestionable evi dence of having died from violence of some kind. Every woods-man will tell you the same. What becomes of the dead wild animals that die natural deaths ? " Sex in Industry. The special report of the Massachu setts bureau of statistics of labor on "Sex in Industry" shows that women no longer need to depend on men for a living. According to the figures , wo man's emancipation is about complete. More than 88 per cent , of the women workers of Massachusetts are unmar ried. They prefer freedom , work arid income of their own and care nothing ' for romance. Divorces , too , have In creased , being about one to every eighteen marriages. After a woman gives a party she nearly always says : "I was so sur prised to see t .ere ; she so seldom goes , " HO WTO GET A PATENT. CONSIDERABLE RED T4PE SURROUNDS - ROUNDS THE PROCESS. Jnst What Onjrht to Be Dine to Pro tect the Original Idea United States IB Very Active in Protecting Rights of Those Granted Patents. Lots of people think they have ideas worth patenting , but few of them know how to go about it to get their devices patented. There is a long line of red tape to be first unraveled. 'In England it is an easy matter to secure a patent , but the laws there are not nearly so well arranged to protect the owner of the patent after he has been successful. Infringements are all too common , and many inventors have come to this country to live in order to enjoy our more liberal pat ent provisions. Germany , conscious of the great influence our patent laws have had in stimulating industrial in ventions , has revised its patent laws so as to bestow more protection upon the inventors. Next to the patent office of the United States the corresponding spending Institution in Germany fur nishes the most ample protection to inventors , and goes farthest in encour aging their work. One of the most beneficial features of our patent office Laws is that by which an applicant can practically pre-empt a claim in advance. When an idea of a new invention occurs to one , it may not always be possible to complete it immediately , and work it out in all its minute details. An other may have heard an account of the proposed invention and attempt to steal the idea. To prevent this the inventor has the right to secure a caveat or caution , upon the payment of $10 , and the filing of a description of the proposed patent. This caveat is filed at the patent office , and is kept confidentially , so that outsiders can not make use of its information. This claim is in force for a full year , and during that time no one else can se cure a patent for the same invention. There is further protection afforded the applicant in permitting him to modify and alter his caveat if he has claimed too much or made errors in his first papers. Such errors are nat urally costly , and are justly charged for by the patent office. A corrected reissue of a caveat costs ? 30. But even this expense in many cases proves of the utmost benefit to the claimant. When the idea Is perfected the in ventor sets forth , his application for a patent as minutely as possible in writing , which must be liled in the patent office. A full description of the invention must be made , so that any person could produce a model. When ever the invention admits , a model must accompany the application. When the application , description and specifications have been completed , the inventor must attest to its genu ineness ami originality , and sign rhe document in the presence of two Avit- nesses. The applicant imist , moreover , swear that he knows of no prior claim to the invention , and that , so far as he is personally aware , no description of such an invention has ever been published. Every applicant can make his claim personally and defend his rights , but there are patent lawyers who have been admitted to practice at the bar of the patent office. A list of these law- years is furnished by the patent office : ree of cost upon application. Their business is to see that applicants' specifications are properly made out , and later to appear before the exura- ners and substantiate the claims and contest them with any who , may put n counter-claims. The ordinary cost of securing a pat ent is $3. ) , which the patent office re quires in return for passing upon the claims and issuing patent papers. The patent office endeavors to protect ap plicants in their selection of lawyers , and deliberate fraud and extortion on the part of the latter might result in their permanent disbarment. When the specifications and descriptions are filed it costs the applicant oulv $ to , and he may have the question deter mined for this fee whether a patent can or cannot be granted him The final $20 must be paid when the pat ent is issued. When the examiners finally pass ipon the patent , a fee of $20 must be paid , and some time within six months the necessary papers will be ssued. The patent is printed and a picture of the model lithographed. The papers are signed and sealed , and sent ; o the Secretary of the Interior to Ign. Then they .are countersigned by he commissioner of patents and sent o the successful applicant or his law yer. The patent secures the inventor or seventeen years in the exclusive ight of using , making and selling his nvention , and the laws of the United States protect him In the enjoyment f these rights. Collier's Weekly. Two fJnckvroods Games. Clifton Johnson , in his desultory traveling through the Adirondacks , ollected many a bit of folk-lore and lomespun talk. At one log house where he stayed the two boys were olaying , in the evening , the game of bumblebee. " Ted had his fists together , thumbs up , a light stick poised on them. Geoflry was moving the forefinger of his right hand round the end of the itick In an erratic manner , sometimes fast , sometimes slowly , dodging this way and that. At the same time he kept up a continual buzzing. Sudden ly he picked up he srtek and gave his' brother's thumbs a smart rap. "There , " said be , "the bubblebee stung ! " Ted had tried to part his fists and let the stick pass harmlessly between them , but he had not been quick enough. If he had succeeded he would have been the "bumblebee" himself , and tried to "sting" Geoffry. Then the two boys began to play "chipmunk. " Ted got down on all fours , facing Geoffry , and the latter , who remained seated , spread apart his legs , and. by putting his open hands I just inside his knees made a kind of > human trap. Ted , squawking and 1 chattering , dodged his head this way ' and that over the trap , and when he j thought there was a good chance bobbed it down between Geoffry'a legs , while Geoffry , by thumping his knees and hands together , tried to make a capture. But the chipmunk had es caped , and he set his "trap" again. When Ted succeeded in catching Geoffry's head the two changed places. A young member of Parliament was addressing a meeting at which there was a considerable rowdy element present. Like the other speakers , he was frequently interrupted , until , los ing patience , he called for sile-nce , say ing : "Don't let every ass bray at once. " "Very well , we will let you go on bray ing , sir , " said the ringleader , and the honorable member was left without a reply. The other day Secretary Hitchcock referred the following letter , addressed to him , to the Pension "Bureau , for consideration : "Befar the war there wasent no man who could a throwed me down or made me holler but now a goodish sized man could blow me over and I am so nervious I holler when I heer a hog squeak in killiu time or the jists of my oald house grone with the wind. I aint playiu no baby ack Mr. Sectery , but if you alls is spreadin $20 bills out in the son to dry you inite just as well let me have a few as any nuther ole soljer. I ort to be paid for my uerviousness. " At Newport last summer George J. Gould went aboard a battleship which was suiTounded by a multitude of lit tle boats , filled with curious spectators bent on seeing all that could be seen. There was a young officer on board who must have sat down accidentally on a fresh painted b n.-h or simehng of that kind , says Mr. Gould , "for his white duck trousers were very dirty , lie , though , was not aware , of it. He moved among the ladies gallantly , and his trousers were an eyesore. Finally some one n one of the litile boats be low in a stent.u'hvn Irish voice shouted : 'Och , misther , wouldn't yer ducks be beter for a shwiiii ? ' " In his monologue at the Orpheum re cently , James J. Corbett told of an in cident that occurred at the Coney Isl and Club when he fought "Jim" Jeff ries for the first time. The fighters had to pass through the crowd on the way to the dressing-rooms. One man there , though he had never seen either of the fighters , had backed Jeffries heavily. As Corbett , followed by his trainers , passed into the place , some one yelled : "Hello , here's Jim ! " The man who was backing Jeffries though , ! it was his favorite who had arrived , and he rushed up and caught Corbett by the hand. "Good luck , Jim ! " he shouted ; "I hope you knock Corbett's block off. " Lord Charles Beresford was one ? breakfasting in a small country hotel , and accidentally upset a cup of coffee over the clean white tablecloth , which the good lady , of the house had dug up from her most sacred linen cupboard for the benefit of the British admiral. Unfortunately , the upsetting of the steaming coffee also upset the good lady's temper , and she soundly rated Lord Charles for his want of tact. "It's a good thing for you , " she said , "that the coffee has not left much stain on my cloth ! " "It was too weak , madam , " replied the admiral ; "you'll have to stain your coffee before you can expect to stain your table linen. Use more beans , ma'am ; use more beans ! " Hot "Water lor Headache. A headache caused by exposure to the hot sun or exhaustion can some times be cured in half an hour or sooner by the simple remedy of hot water ; not lukewarm water , but as hot as the flesh will endure. Take off the waist , loosen the clothing , knot the hair out of the way , and hold the head over a basin of hot , steaming water. Take a large sponge and lift It soaking to the back of the neck. It will be more effectually acocmplished if you can get some one to do it for you. Sponge back of the ears , the back of the neck , and the base of the brain. Continue this treatment till the nerves seem to relax and the agony gradually passes away. Hot water will often give help in an attack of erysipelas. Philadelphia Telegraph. Life's Every farmer boy wants to be a school teacher , every school teacher hopes to be an editor , every editor would like to be a banker , every bank er would like to be a trust magnate , and every trust magnate hqpes eome day to own a farm and have chickens and cows and pigs and horses to look after. We end where we begin. Sa line County ( Kans. ) Index. The man who can't work when It Is hot stops to enjoy the weather when It becomes cool. LET THIS COUPON BE YOUR A1ESSENGER OF DELIVERANCE FROM KIDNEY , BLADDER , AND URINARY TROUBLES. It's the people who . - Tlte reason yon cai doubt and become g t this trial frm > I * 1 > - cured while thy doubt I CUII.HW they euro Kidney who praise Doan's Pills ! Ills and will prove itti * the highest. I you. Aching backs arc eased. I Kidney you.WEST PRA.vcn. Mien. IIIp , back , and loin pains "Doan's K klncy 1'Hla hit tho- P/7/5 / overcome. Swelling of the i / , cas , which v > as an uuusual limbs and dropsy signs { FJUtt 50 CtWtS. draire to urinate hail to- vanish. fjet up live or six timjas of Thof correct urine with a mgut. I think diabetes- brick'-dust sediment , high was well underway , tho- colored , pain in passing , feet and ankles swelled. NAME. There was an intense pain dribblintj , frequency , bed j wetting. Doan's Kidney in the Lack , thu heat of Pills remove calculi and P. O which would feel like put- gravel. Keliere hrart pal tinpr one's hand up to a pitation , sleeplessness , STAT E. _ lamp chimney. 1 have * used the free trial ami tvro headache , nervousness , For free trial bor , mall this coupon to ' dizziness. Fostor-Milbuni Co. . Buffalo. N. Y. If above full boxes or Uoan'.s Pill * TAYLORVIU.E , MISS. "I vpaco N Insufficient , write address on sepa with the Rat ! sfaction of tried everything fora wenk rate slip. feeling that 1 am cured back and got no relief until They nre the remedy par 1 used Doan's Pills. " ADVICE FIUvE. excellence " J. N. LEWIS. B. F. A new social diversion has been con trived by MibS Rjsamond Guthre , of Mexico , Mo. She gave a party , and seventeen couples started from her .home in seventeen buggies. After driving ten or fifteen minutes , all [ the buggies stopp > d , and each gentle man got out and c imbed into the buggy just ahead of him. This was kept up all the evening. IT/he changes .of partners were interspersed by re freshments at four different resi- 'deuces. SJIS3ORS There is nn error without intelii- gence. The Schoolmaster. A man's true wealth is the good he does in the world. Mahomet. The mission of the skepLio is to retard progn ss. The Crusader. Wise is the fool who knows .enough to keep it to himself. Ex change. . Same men gri to bed to late ever to wake up famous. Chicago News. The chief end of man is the one with the head on. Chicago Isews Men make sucress by making use of their failures. Common Sense. ( : If you don't understand the other fellow just laugh. Th ° Schoolmaster. Nothing can be hostile to religion which is agreeable to justice. Ala bama Elk. . Bacon can be cured by smokingbut the tobacco habit can't. Stanford 'Advocate. It should not be forgotten that some of the best opportunities are home-made. Puck. Optimists get more fun in hoping than pessimists do in having. at- turday Evening Post. Oood fortune is simply the result of [ grod habits , good methods and good principles. Common Sense. ' The man who conceals his failures uvill in the end triumph over the man who trumpets his successes New York Press. "To w > rk for other ? is in i eality , the only way in which a man can work for himself. Selfishness is ig norance. " Last year America only imported 8 000,000 bushels of potatoes. Twenty-four persons living in County Tipperary , Ireland , are cen- .tenarians. An adder twenty-six inches long has been killed by a gamekeeper at .Tobermory , Mull. Japanese is the latest language to be added to the list at the Univers ity of Chicago. Games of love often end in a tip. . Self-possessiou is nine points with the lawyer. He who takes his own time gen erally takes other people's , too. Smoking cars for ladies are in use on some of the Russian railroads. Cynical Views of 1,1 le. Be honest , and your friends will call you rude. Be pious , and people will call you a. hypocrite. Be iudependent and people will say you put DD airs. Be philosophical , and people will call you a regular fool. Be tactful , and people will wonder what you are driving at. Astromomers announce that the Star of Bethlehem , which directed the wise men to the birth place of the Savior , will appear once more in 1910 or 1911. Josephus the Hebrew historian , speaks of this star , which is now known as Halley's comet , and since this time it has appeared on twenty-three occasions. So little have the industries ot India been all'ectcd by the British occupation that the native smith j still forges lucilly made iron on a I stone anvil within eighty miles of jSimia. Miss E. Leslie Jackson has painted ; * rom nature in water colors 77 varieties - | eties of wild { lowers of Alaska. This collection is now iu "Washington , D. C. , and will he a feature of the Al- laskau exhibit at the world's fair. Congressional garden seeds are dis tributed for the purpose of raising votes. . A good stomach is sometimes as useful as brains in helping a man along in the woild. It takes a bachelor with money to exterminate the weeds from a wid ow's bonnet. The small boy always wonders if his mother will ever get over being surprised at the things he does. Some men are born great , some achieve greatness and otheis manage to grow smaller each day. If our neighbors had as few faults as ourselves what a pleasarrt old world this would be to live in. Still Another Case. Frnnksville , Wis. , Oct. 12. Many re markable cures are being reported from all over the country , but there is one right here in Franksville which is certainly worth publishing , and which has not as yet been given to the public. Mrs. Louis Markison of this place had been a sick woman for quite a long time and could not Olid anything- to give her any help. She suffered all the painful symptoms of what is gen erally known as female weakness. Ev ery woman who re-ads her story will understand these distressing conditions which combine to make the lives of many women one long burden of weakness and suffering. Mrs. Markison chanced one day to hear of a new remedy called Dodd's Kidney Pills , that was said to be a splendid medicine for women's weak ness. She determined to try some and soon found herself getting better. She kept on with the pills and was cured. Spdaking of her case Mrs. Markison says : "I can and do praise Dodd's Kidney Pills as a remedy for female weakness. They are the best medicine I have ever' known , and have done me a great deal of good. " The Lackdwauua railroad is en hancing the natural scenic localities of its line with lands-ape gardening at every station between Buffalo and New York. No man's ignorance ever prevented ; him from giving advice. tlowaro of OlntmnU for Catarrh tha * Contain 3'ercury , as mercury will surely destroy the sense of smell and completely deranpe the whole system when cnterim/it through the mucous surfaces. Such articles should never be used except on prescriptions from reputable physicians , as the damage they will do is tenfold to the } : oed you can possibly derive from them. Hall's Catarrh Cure , manufactured by F. J. Cheney & Co. . Tole do. 0. , contains no mercury , and is taken inter nally , acting directly upon the blood and mu cous surfaces of the system. In buying Hall's Catarrh Cure be sure you cet the genuine. It la taken internally , and made in Toledo , Ohio , by F. J. Cheney & Co. 'I estimonials free. Sola by Druggists , price 75c. per bottle. Hall's Family Pills are the best. . . A youne man seldom realizes how dear his best girl is until he goes broke trying to make her wishes come true * FREE TO WOMEN ! To prove the healing and cleansing power of fax- tine ToiJet Antiseptic we will mail a itrge trial package with book of in structions absolutely free. This is not a tiny sample , but a large package , enough to convince anyone of its value. Women all over the country are prais-1 ing Paxtine for what it has done in local treatment of female ilia , curing all inflam mation and discharges , wonderful as a. cleans tog vaginal douche , for sore throat , nasal ca * tarrh , as a mouth wash , and to remove tartar and whiten the teeth. Send to-day ; a postal card will do. Sold by drncsUt * or cent p itpald by H , MBU. Urjje box. eatlnCuetlon guaranteed. X. PAXTUN CO. . 216 Coluipbuj Ava . Bostoi. The old surety , through its penetrating power , promptly cures heumatism Price , 25c. and 50c.