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About McCook weekly tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 188?-1886 | View Entire Issue (March 27, 1884)
SOLITUDE. Laugh , and the world laughs with you , "Weep , apd you weep alone , For the sad old Dearth must borrow Its mirth , But has trouble enough of its own. Sing , and thehlilswilj'answer ; , Sigh , -It is lost on the air , The echoes'bound to"a joyful sound' , But shrink fro'm voicing care. Rejoice , andmen wilt seek you. Grieve , and they turn and go. They want full measure of all your pleas ure , But they do not need your woe. Be glad' , and your friends are many , Bo sad , and you lose them all , There are -none to decline your nectared wine , But alone you must drink life's gall. Feast'and your halls are crowded , Fast , and the world goes by , Succeed and give , and it helps you live , But no man can help you die. There is room in the halls of pleasure For a largo and lordly train , But one by one we must all file on Through the narrow halls of pain. [ Ella Wheeler. A FINE MITCH. My. story begins where all others end. I have been married since yester day. Love is necessaary in a story , and perhaps with many immoral writers you may think that marriage is the grave of love. This is possible with others'but altogether false with me. In order to have a grave love must first have lived , and for me $ alas ! it is yet to be born. It is true , I have sworn to my wife by the light of the moon and the stars ( I believe that is the regular thing to do ) that I love her , but it was an awful lie. I have told her , too , ahe was beautiful , but that was a still more awful lie. You'ought just to see her. Two sins to my account , therefore. YetI _ hope they will be forgiven me , for I did not commit them of my own free will. 1 was born an orphan , I believe. I never knew anything about my father and mother. They must have existed , there can be no doubt of it , but that is all I can impart concerning them. An uncle adopted me , gave me a frock , a cent every Sunday , and every other day blows to inculcate virtue , this being continued until I was 12 years old and had partaken ot my first com munion. Then my uncle said , "Now you are no longer a child , " and a fort night after my becoming a man I found myself in a boarding-school , where for three years I was a victim to the larger scholars , and for another three years the tyrant of the smaller ones , until finally the high school opened its doors to me. "Study hard now , so that you will soon get through.Willem , for you must always bear in mind that you have not the slightest claim to all I am giving you , but have to thank my Kindness alone for it all. " So my uncle wrote me every month. Whenever I passed a good examina- < 'tion'Iwas : "That is aH right , but it cost me enough. " And on everv pos sible occasion and to everybody my food uncle said , "This is my nephew ; have brought him up , and , let him study at my expense ; every year he costs me two thousand francs , of which I shall never see a single centime again. " Myunole treated me very well in deed , and I was certainly grateful for it ; he upraided me so often , however , for what he had done for me that al last I could not endure him in spite oi all my gratitude. However , I finished my studies , and the head of the examining ; board an nounced Willem van denlJerghe as a doctor of medicine. I lived with my uncle , who in a fit of magnanimity al lowed me to put my shingle on , his door , and now indeed nothing was wanting to my happiness but patients. I waited patiently ior one , two three - months , took rapid-walks through the town to make believe that I had been sent for , strained every nerve to suc ceed. I was young , and I waited pa tiently four or five months ; but pa tience is not the virtue of all of us mortals. One afternoon. I sai quietly , in mj consultation room and thought about love and patients for what else oughl a man to think about when he is twen > ty-three years old and a doctor of nied icine ? Suddenly my uncle's gruf Toice called out : , "Come , dress up , Willem , put 01 your best coat and gloves , " andWillen obeyed. Together we went out of the house passed through two or three streets and stopped at last befere an old fashioned mansion with a double stair case leading to the door , where we ranj the bell. "Now , * just be very > polite to th < " mVuncle's command young lady , was while a servant as old-fashioned as th < house , introduced us into a room whicl was poorly lighted and smelled ver musty. There sat behind a table Madami Boedaart , a red-ribboned cap on he head and a cat on her lap. I though I had to be polite without delay , an < was just about beginning when Mis Boedaart appeared with a cap whosi ribbons were redder even than thi mother's. She wore a dress whicl perhaps might have been becoming to a pretty woman , but it looke < awful on her. I put her age at twenty seven , and as she happened to be onh twenty-six and a half , my uncle re marked that I always looked on thi worst side. I was as polite as I knew how to be and Miss Anna Boedaart seemed satis fied. Madame Boedaart styled me in variably "dtctor , " and I heard her sa ] to my uncle that she was quite pleasel with me. "What ugly women ! " I thought to myself when we were on the stree again. But I have the bad habit o often thinking aloud , and this time ' . did so again. Ugly women ? " angrily repeated m ] uncle. "Do you know , though , tha the young lady expects to have tw < hundred thousand ' francs , and do yoi ? " - . call that ugly It was the first time in my life I had heard that any one with two hundred thousand francs must be considered beautiful. When we reached home again , my uncle said : * "Willem , you have been a bachelor long enough ; now it is time for you to marry. " "Yes , uncle , " I replied ; "but to bo married one must.finil.the woman , just as patients are * m-ceaaary 6"make a "Well-what about Mi = s r.ocilaurt ? " spoke up my uncle with a ouiil- : meant to1 be sly. "There is something i'oryou. I think she is inclined to like you , and then'your fortune would be made at one stroke , my boy. " "Yes , but she is a little too ugly , " I objected rather timidly , .for I was-not accustomed to contradicting. - "Too ugly ? " snarled my uncle at me. "She has two hundred thousand francs , and I am tired o | supporting you. You have cost me money enough already , and you are not worth your money yet" There was nothing to be said to that ; _ had to give way , and yesterday ] spoke the final yes/ "Your fortune is made , young man , ' said to me this morning a man of fort } years and much experience. In truth I have a wife , a house , twr dogs , a cat , ( my wife had to bring il with her , she was attached to it ) and expectations of two hundred thous and francs. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * A year later Mother Boedaart said of her son-in-law. "He has become quite another man ; I said long ago that he would change' . ' ' And indeed Willem 'had become quite another man , a man after his wife's heart. Mothers and daughters are often wont to discourse on marriage. The Boedaarts had had time enough , so they had gone deep into the subject. "A good nusband , my dear child1 Mother Boedaart had said , "is difficult to find ; a husband that is steady , stays at home with his wife , leads a virtuous and Christian life , is * a treasure on earth. " And the daughter had pondered over the qualities such a good husband ought to have , had imagined a model husband , and Willem van den Berghe was the unlucky man whose fate it waste to realize this model. In the very first week his clothing was reformed. Miss Anna had.always had a holy horror of frivolous men , and she had invariably represented them to'herself with a cap on then heads , in a short coat , a pair of light pantaloons , and a gaudy necktie. So Willem's cap was given to a boy of the street , his other garments adorned the gardner and the baker's boy , and he received a long coat , a gaily flowered vest , a large hat , a big watch and s white necktie. Thus arrayed he was allowed on Sundays to go to mstss and vespers with his wife. Now he looked like a doctor , at least , Mother Boedaart observed ; the fonuui foppish costume was not at all suit able Willem did not quite willingly make himself ridiculous , but as it brough ! peace to the household he had "ir God's name'put ] on the white necktie In another matter , however , he offeree a more obstinate resistance. This was the society of his young friends , ir which he found some distraction , am could sometimes be merry for a fev hours. From morning he lived in an ticipation of the evening which he waite to spend with them. His wife had no objected very much in the beginning but it was only postponed and not en tirely given up. Gradually the opinion arose that tin husband came home too late , and there after Willem started homeward punc ually at half-past nine. Then it was "Ah , you couldn't remain at home ! single evening ! " and at least once i week Willem had to give up hi friends. At last one day he was summoned ti Mother Boedaart. "See here , Willem- ' she addressei him in a solemn " tone , "when I gav- my daughter" you , you promisei that she. should Jive happily wit ! you. " "Yes , mother , " responded Willem "Now then do do - , , you everything-1 make her life sweet and agreeable Have you nothing to reproach yourse ] with ? " "No , mother , " replied Willem , aui he might have mentioned the cigar h had given up and the white necktie h had put on , yet he preferred to awai the storm. "Then I must tell you right out,1 continued the mother in wrath , "tha it is a shame to leave your wife alon so much , while you waste your time i saloons , and that you will bring th poor girl to her grave. " Willem was frightened by the idea c being such a villain , and stammered : "But , mother , I sit with her th whole day. " "Surely you don't see , though , hoi pale and thin your wife is getting , an how she is wasting away from dav t day. " .Willem indeed saw nothing of th kind , but he saw enough of what was i .store for him. He went home ; his wif gave him a cross reception. In th evening he * went out , and when he cam home his wife was sick abed. As h was going out again the next evenin supper was not yet ready. So it wer on , and his wife looked daggers at hir all the time , and his mother-in-lai preached incessantly. Willem gave u seeing his friends , and now lives in at cordance with his wife's wishes. Every morning he rises at eigl o'clock and goes about in his dressing gown until twelve. Then he is allowe < to go out ; at one o'clock sharp , ho\ ever , he must be back again , for .hi wife has laid down the rule never t wait with the meals. In. the afternoo : he may do what he pleases , but not g out , for then his wife would have to si alone ; nor read , for then he could no talk with his wife ; and not sleep , fo he is still too young for that. Othei wise he can do anything he likes fo example , hol'd the yarn or look afte the stove. The evening excursions are don away once for all , and there is no nee * of his working. Every fortnight ther is a company of 'old wives and ruaic ens , where lotto1 is played the who ! evening. ' - , - His uncle , who makes him a visit from time to time , although madame cannot endure too many strangers in the house , slaps him on the shoulder and - * says , "You see now , young man , that your ; uncle wasn't a fool , after all , and don't you have a happy life ? To have noth ing to do , to find your bread already earned as soon as you get up in the morning indeed , my young friend , that is such a match as ono would gladly look * for with a lantern. You were surely born to be lucky. " In truth , Willem has a wife , a mother-in-law , a house , two dogs , two cats ( his wife has got another one she has no children ! ) and. expectations of two hundred thousand francs. The happy young man ! Sensible Women. London Queen. A sensible woman take life philo sophically , which is by no means the same as tepidly or unfeelingly. What she can conquer by calm , strong re sistance she does ; what she cannot conquer she submits to patiently and quietly. Where a shriek would free her from danger she would scream as loudly as her neighbors ; but where it would do nothing for her own safety and much for the distraction of those who heard her , she keeps a calm sough , and betrays nothing even to the reeds. If fond of the country and herfate lands tier at Bermondsey , she makes the best of what she has , and refuses to shape the wood of her house tree into a cross she can never forget. Certainly , Ber mondsey is not inviting , and hei father's place down in Somersetshire was a very heaven of rural beauty. But if she cannot have it ? What is the use of crying over the inevitable , of desiring he impossible , of trying to churn the spilt milk into butter ? When she mar ried her Janus she married into the contingencies of a clergyman's life , among which is counted the necessity of taking that which will give a suffi cient amount of family bread. Again , f , on the other hand , she has been used ; o the intellectual life and vivacity oi London , she does not moon away hei ife in unavailing regrets when she is sent down to that desolate , companionless - panionless living on the edge oi ; he fens , but sets herself tti make the garden trim and the house pretty and-nomelike within , and when she is forced to look out she speaks oi the sense of expanse in the sky and not of the ugly dreariness of the land scape , nor yet of the desolate solitude of her surroundings. She is far too sensible to spend her strength in re grets , and she thinks the best way of bearing burdens of all kinds is to pad them with cheerfulness , and not to cut lier shou1ders sore with unavailing ir ritation. Things which have to be done at any cost , things which have to be borne at any price , she does not bear with the wise courage of common sense , by which she avoids the pains courted by fretfulness , and , in making the best of things , has always some thing in her hand which at least is rel atively good.Cheerful -and fond of children , as all sensible women are and must be to deserve the style and name , she is the life of the small brood when they gather in little groups or isolated units , stiff , strange and shy , in the drawing-room , where they are the guests of the hour. If the hostess is inapt , the sensible woman supplies her deficiencies and takes her place natu rally , as of right and by orderly ar rangement of things. No one knows how she does it , but in a short time she has put all in train , when the ball is set rolling , and the fun of the fair has be gun. The children look to her as their leader , and she knows how to smooth' away all the difficulties which may arise. She encourages th ( timid , helps the awkward , gently re presses the rude , tames into due saber dination , without extinguishing , th ( rampant spirits of the boisterous. Sh < makes herself the center and the soul , but always with moderation ; and what without her , would have been a fiascc for dullness or a riot for rudeness , sh < makes into an "evening of which thi little creatures talk for weeks after , am remember fet years as a glimpse inl < fairyland. So in'any home where shi may be with young people long pas mere childhood. If a wet day come she sets everything in motion , and turn what else would have been gloom an < ennui into pleasure and brisk amuse ment. And all this without any kin < of self-assertion , though , being a scnsi ble woman , she is rationally fond o amusement for her own share. Still it is as much or rather more for other than for herself that she works a "making things go , " and her desire t < amuse others is stronger than even he own wish to be amused. The sensibl woman takes a healthy interest in he neighbors , but she is TJV no means ; gossip , still less a scandal-monger At no time will she be brought int the folly of discussiug me tives , or judging of things by th seamy side of appearances. And i persistently bored by those who find pleasure in seeing all things a travel and all people more or less scoundrel undetected , she does her best to initi gate what she can Hot prevent. Sh has strong principles , but she is not a : active proselyter. She lets others thin for themselves , and , only when calle on to testify , raises her own privat flag aloft. She knows the differenc between constancyand aggression , and with the courage of her opinions , ha also the modesty of reticence. ' Sh treats her servants as , in a certai sensje , her friends , her children , whil still keeping the reins of home goverr ment in her own hands. But they al know that when they do their duty , sh will rewaid them , or at least recogniz by kind words and hearty acknowledg ment that they have done well , and tha when they neglect it she .will rebuk them. She will be neither indifferer on the one side nor remiss on the other and thus her household always feels an knows that her eyes are open and he heart is warm. The Countess Euphemia Ballestrer has translated the queen's book int German , and Victoria herself has re vised and corrected this edition , whic shortly will be published at Stuttgart Baron Tauchnitz will also bring it OD in English at Leipsic. I JUPITER'S INFLUENCE. This ISeaatiful Star Creates the Greatest Happiness in This World. PltubnrgUbimtcb. The planet Jupiter is known among astrologers as the Great Fortune and is , under Providence , the author of most of the prosperity and happiness which -he people of this world enjoy. It is a .arge and very beautiful star , so promi nent that it cannot bo mistaken , as ihere is something vary peculiary bril liant and benign in the rays of light which it sheds. Jupiter is south now about 915 o'clock. It is a strong point in favor of astro logical doctrine that a system of read ing the stars has existed among all the people of earth from the remotest times peoples so widely apart that it does not seem there could ever have been any communication between them. But notwithstanding this the principles of faith are the same. Jupiter is always , under whatever name known , the good planet , * and Saturn the planet of evil ; Venus fortunate , and Mars the reverse. Nowhere in hieroglyphics , writings or traditions do we find that Jupiter brought down unpropitious conditions , or that Saturn was considered friendly or beneficent. This shows again what lias already been demonstrated , that the art was founded on demonstration , or , as some believe , had a divine origin. The nature of Jupiter is benevolent , and he produces honest , kindly , frank , and high-minded natures. From this fact we obtain our word jovial. He rules over the fifth day of the week Thor's day , or Thurs day a most ancient belief. He produces clear and warm weather , and if the reader will take the trouble to watch the almanac he will find that whenever Jupiter forms a major aspect with the sun the temperature always moderates and generally stays pleasant for several days. The number five in Hebrew , affixed to the fifth day of the week , Chemash , is composed of chem , warmth , and ash , a star. Now , an other curious thing is that Jupiter was bhe star of religion , ruling priests and holy things , and if we.reverse the first letters in Chemash we have meschach , to anoint with oil , the root being cog nate with mech , fat. Mashich means aimointed , and from it we get Messiah , and the relation between annointing and the investiture of priests is thus at once seen. The old Hebrew name of Jupiter was Gad , and it is referred to in the Bible. Pisces is his house , and in Genesis xxx. , 12 and 13 , we read : "And bore Zilpah , servant to Leah , to Jacob , a son ; and said Leah , 'cometh Sad , ' and she called the name of him Sad. " This is the old Nulgate trans lation , and Abarbanel says : "This Gad s the star Jupiter.In the analogy 3etween the twelve signs sf the Zodiac and the twelve sons of Jacob , we read that the eleventh was Gad , "a troops oi army , " and reversing it we get 'Dag , which mjans a fish , and alludes , oi sourse , to Pisces and the planet Jupi- er. er.To be successful in life it is absolute ly necessary that this planet , Jupiter , should be strongly situated at the na tivity. If rising , or in the inidheaveh , and aspecting at the same time either of the luminaries , the prosperity will be unbounded. For wealth , the best position he can have is in the second house , but he must not be in square 01 opposition to Mars or Saturn. He is also favorably situated when in the western angle , particularly with people ple who have to deal much with Ihe world. The general character of Jupitei when-ascending is to produce a person of noble , honest , generous , and ha mane sentiments ; but a good deal de pends on what sign the planet is in and with waat other bodies he is configa rated. In the fiery triplicity ( Sagit- tory , Aries and Leo ) the native or sub ject is bold , good-natured , sincere hearty in his manner and to be depend ed upon. In the earthy ( Taurus , Vir go and Capricorn ) the person is not sc true , more selfish and politic , reservet and unreliable. In the watery ( Pisces Scorpio and TCancer ) a careless ant jolly temperament , fond of conviviality free and even reckless with money , am as a rule extremely lucky. In the air there is a magnanimous , just and faith ful disposition , a kind heart and libera mind. They also are singularly fortu nate. Some writers on astrology say tha Jupiter in evil aspect to the sun o : moon is a bad position that will pre vent success ; but this is an error. It i not propitious in one respect inamucl as it wastes the means or causes losse ; and expenses ; but any aspect of Jupi ter to the luminaries is bettor than nom because there is certain to be ultimate success. Mars appears to bethemostinjuriou ; planet to Jupiter , as when configurate < by the square or opposition , or whei in conjunction , he causes extravaganci and a foolish indulgence in Hazard betting and speculation. The evil ray ; of Saturn will frequently bring abou bankruptcy , but the trine or sextil i excellent for dealing in real estate o ; engaging in agriculture. Venus am Jupiter , when together , give mucl good taste. It is curious that these tw < planets , rising at the same time , wil produce remarkably pretty blue eyes Jupiter in aspect to Mercury exercisei great influence upon the mind , causing not only unusual ability , but honesty candor and a strong sense of justice In judging the prospects offortuni in a nativitylt is customary for the as trologer first to note if there are man ] planets in angles , and then if there ar < many above the earth and oriental , foi all these are good indications. Nex he will see whether the sun and mooi have any configuration with Jupiter It must be likewise observed whethei the planets are for the most part sig ni fied , that is , in signs with which the ] have sympathy. Jupiter , for instance is signified in Sagittory and Pisces , be cause they are his houses ; but the re verse in Gemini and Virgo , becausi those two cast the opposition ray t < him when he is domiciliated. It is pro pitious to find the planets , particularl ] the moon , moving rapidly. Neithe : she nor the sun are ever "retrograde but the others frequently are , and itde lays success. The sun and moon in trine from an glea , and either of them exalted is cei tain to give rank and power. The sun in good aspect to Mars from fiery signs win give high military position. The sun in conjunction with Jupiter in the sign Cancer , and the moon at the same time in Scorpio , or if , Jupiter bo in trUe with both from Pisces , it is an ab solute assurance of wealth and pros perity. These are some lew of the rules , and give an idea of the nice judgment and discretion that must be 9mployed in studying the testimonies. On the other hand , those who have the planets in cadent houses , occidental or under the earth , or whoso luminaries have no ray from Jupiter , load poor and insignificant lives. If Saturn should be prominent they know little but trouble. The signs themselves as they occupy the angles and con tain the planets have likewise an appreciable influence over the fortune. Not many people borij under Capricorn and Pisces are , as a general rule , lucky. Taurus , Scorpio , Cancer and Virgo are fair ; but better than these arc Sagit tory , Aries , Gemini , Libra and Aqua- ries. A majority of the planets in the cardinal signs authority and fame usually follow ; next in this m.ttter come the fixed signs ; but those which are known as the common signs have much less influence. There are sound philosophic reasons for these definitions , and they are not mere arbitrary arrangements , as they may appear. Drunk in a Ping Hat. Bill Nye In Puck. This world is filled with woe every where you go. Sorrow is piled up in the fence corners on every road. Un availing regret and red-nosed remorse inhabit the cot of the tie-chopper as well as the cut-glass cage of the mil lionaire. The woods are full of disap pointment. The earth is convulsed with the universal sob , and the roads are muddy with tears. But I do not call to mind a more touching picture of unavailing misery and ruin and hope less chaos than'the plug hat that has endeavored to keep sober and maintain its self-respect while its owner is drunk. A. plug hat can stand prosperity , and shine forth joyously while nature smiles. That's the place where it seems to thiive. A tall silk hat looks well on a thrifty man with a clean collar , but it cannot stand dissipation. 1 once knew a plug hat that had been respected by every one , and had won its way upward by steady endeavor. No one knew aught against it till one evening , in an evil hour , it consented to attend a banquet , and all at once its joyous career ended. It met nothing but distrust and cool neglect every where after that. Drink seems to make a man tem porarily , unnaturally exhilarated. Dur ing the temporary exhilaration he de sires to attract attention by eating lob ster salad out of his own hat , and sitting down on his neighbor's. The demon rum is bad enough on the coatings of the stomach , but it is even more disastrous to the tall hat. A man may mix up in a crowd and carry off an overdose of valley tan in a soft hat or cap , but the silk hat will proclaim it upon the housetops and ad vertise it to the gaping , wondering world. It has a way of getting back on the rear elevation of the head , 01 over the bridge of the nose , or of hang ing coqucttishly on one ear that says tc the eagle-eyed public , "I am chock- full. " I cannot call to mind a more power ful lecture on temperance than the silent pantomime of a man trying tc hang his plug hat on an invisible peg ir his own hall after he had been watch ing the returns three years ago. I sav that he was excited and nervously un strung when he came in , but I did nol fully recognize it until he began tc hang his hat on the smooth wall. At first he laughed in a good-natured way at his own awkwardness and hung it up again carefully ; but at last he be came irritated about it , and almost for got himself enough to swear , but con trolled himself. Finding , however , that it refused to hang up , and that il seemed rather restless , anyhow , he pul it in the corner of the hall with the crown up , pinned it to the floor witt his umbrella , and heaved a sigh of re lief. Then he took off his overcoat , and , through clerical error , pulled ofl his dress coat also. I showed him his mistake and offered to assist him bacls into his apparel , but he said he hadn'l got so old and feeble yet that he could not dress himself. Later on he came- into the parloi wearing a linen ulster , with the bell drooping behind him like the broken harness hanging to a shipwrecked and stranded mule. His wife looked at hire in a way that froze his blood. This startled him so that he stepped back a pace or two , tangled his'feet in the cir- cingle , clutched wildly at the emptj gas-light , but missed it , and sat dowr in a tall majolica cuspidor. There were three games of whist go ing on when he fell , and there was a good deal of excitement over the play ing ; but , after he had been pulled oul of the American tear-jug and led away , every one of the twelve whist-players had forgotten what the trump was. They say that he has abandoned pol itics since then , and that now he doesn'l care whether we have any more No vember elections or not. I asked hire once if" he would be active during the 1881 campaign , as usual , and he said he thought not. He said a mat couldn't afford to be too active in c political campaign. His constitutior wouldn't stand it. At that time he didn't care mucl : whether the American people had f president or not. If every public-spir ited voter had got to work himself uj into a state of nervous excitability anc prostration where reason tottered on iti throne , he thought that we needed reform. Those who wished to furnish reason ; to totter on their thrones for the na tional central committee at so mucl per tot , could do so ; he , for one , didn' propose to farm out his immortal sou and plug hat to the party if 60,000,00 ( people had to stand four years undei the administration ef a setting hen. Guitean's Ghost. Washington Republican. A weird and remarkable scene oc curred in the rotunda of the jail yes torday afternoon. Holy communion was administered to Frank Miner , the colored wife murderer , in the presence of a large congregation of colored per sons , by members of'Roberts' Colored Young Men's Christian association and the pastor of , St. Paul's colored Baptist church. During the unusual cere mony of adminiotering the last Lord's supper to a condemned murderer sev eral strange incidents occurred. In the midst of a solemn prayer the loud squealing of a rat echoed through the building , and the next instant one of those uncanny animals rushed out into the rotunda from the direction of the cell formerly occupie'd by Guiteau. Alter a hasty survey of the situation the rat rushed through the congrega tion , and upon reaching Miner , wno with bowed head was listening to the prayer , proceeded to climb up the leg of his trousers. The murderer was strangely affected by the event , , and after he had struck the animal and driven it off ho trembled visibly. * M The Western Wool Growers. The Western wool growers , in con vention at Denver , adopted the follow ing memorial to congress : Whereas , The wool growers of Colorado rado , Kansas , Utah , Wyoming ; , Nebraska - . ka , Idaho , New Mexico and Minnesota | assembled in convention in the city of j Denver , representing 7,500,000 sheep ( and $50,000.000 invested capital , and an annual yield of 85,000,000 pounds of wool ; and Whereas , Said industry has been greatly injured by the reduction of the tariff bill of May , 1883 , and now threat ened with total destruction by the Mor risen tariff bill , just reported to the \ house of representatives by the committee - \ mittee of ways and means ; be it , there fore , Resolved , That we , the wool growers in convention assembled , are opposed to the provisions of the Morrison tariff bill now before congress , which aims to mak'e n further reduction of five per cent on all foreign wools and woolens , and that we ask a reduction of the fariff of 1807 in its entirety as far as it relates to wools and woolens , by which , tor the first time in the industrial his tory of the country , equitable relations were established between the duties on wool and those on woolen goods. Resolved , That we pledge ourselves to work for and to aid in the restoration of the tariff of 1867 on wools and wool ens , and request all persons engaged in or interested in the wool-growing in dustry to co-operate with us. Resolved , That we , as wool-growers and citizens , pledge ourselves to stand by all committees and associations in giving full and complete protection to all American industries in need of the same , and cordially invite their cooperation eration in this matter. The memorial concludes with an ap peal to the western senators and repre sentatives in congress to do all in their power to restore the tariff of 1867. The Hon. E. M. Merrill , of Kansas , was selected to present the memorial to il congress. jj A Bride's Modesty Overcome. Christian Journal. ' "No , George , I am not going to take " * i my shoes off. " "You'd better , dear- - est. " "No , I shan't. Just like as not the train will run off the track. What a place for a lady to sleep in. Catch me taking off ray shoes , nor anything else this night. Why , anybody can come along here and pull these curtains right back. " "Why , dear , it is just as private as in your own room. No one disturbs any one else on. a sleeper. You know I trav Jed a great deal be fore we were married. Now , come , pet , let me untie your shoes for you. " "You shan't , George. I tell you 1 won't take my shoes off , and L won't ; so there. I am going to sit up here and lean against this pillow and look out of this window all night , and I'm ready dressed for breakfast in the morning. You can sleep down there , if you want to. " He argued , reasoned , entreated and commanded , but the six- hour bride remained firm , and it was evident that a dark cloud was on the face of the young honeymoon. The last thing we heard before going to sleep was the beginning of what he said was his last appeal. We didn't hear the end of it , but awoke the next morning and found all quiet in the next berth. All the other passengers were soon up , and the porter had their beds metamorphozed into seats , but still the bridal couple slept. Finally they were ' aroused by the conductor , and" after ' foity minutes floundering in the lower bunk , and frequent whispered inquiries lor missing articles , conspicuous among ; 1 which " other shoe " there 1 was "my , appeared - " peared a plump little woman with frowsy hair and a pair of pretty-blushes which deepened and widened surpris ingly as she met the gaze of her fellow- passengers. It was apparent that she had relented. Climbed Him at Last. Through Mail. "Ever in Californy ? " asked u long , larik , lean , lantern-jawed tramp of a man on Center street the other dav. " "No. " "Wan't in the boom o' ' 49-eh ? " "No. " "Never war in the mines in Colorado or New Mexico , eh ? " "No. " "Don't you know nothin , ' 'bout min- in' a tall ? " "No. " "Well , I be darned ! " said the tramp. "Never was in the war , was ye ? " "Never. " "Knock every button off my pants if this don't beat all ! Ain't a member of the melish ? " "I am not a member of the inelish. " "Wall , blast-my hat , if you ain't the hardest man to work for a"drink I ever struck. Say , pard , ain't yer never been in the penitentiary ? " "Never have. " "Well , try me for a hess thief if I ever see the like. Yer the fust man I ever struck that hadn't done suthin' mean or been to Californy , or in the war , one or t'other. Say , pard , what's yer bizness ? ' ' "I am a bank cashier from New Jer sey. " "Jewhillikens ! Iknowd I'd climb yer yit. An' yer never been in quad ? Well , by jinks , yer orterset 'em up ! " and he did.