Nebraska Newspapers

    SOLITUDE.
Laugh , and the world laughs with you ,
"Weep , apd you weep alone ,
For the sad old Dearth must borrow Its
mirth ,
But has trouble enough of its own.
Sing , and thehlilswilj'answer ; ,
Sigh , -It is lost on the air ,
The echoes'bound to"a joyful sound' ,
But shrink fro'm voicing care.
Rejoice , andmen wilt seek you.
Grieve , and they turn and go.
They want full measure of all your pleas
ure ,
But they do not need your woe.
Be glad' , and your friends are many ,
Bo sad , and you lose them all ,
There are -none to decline your nectared
wine ,
But alone you must drink life's gall.
Feast'and your halls are crowded ,
Fast , and the world goes by ,
Succeed and give , and it helps you live ,
But no man can help you die.
There is room in the halls of pleasure
For a largo and lordly train ,
But one by one we must all file on
Through the narrow halls of pain.
[ Ella Wheeler.
A FINE MITCH.
My. story begins where all others
end. I have been married since yester
day. Love is necessaary in a story , and
perhaps with many immoral writers
you may think that marriage is the
grave of love. This is possible with
others'but altogether false with me.
In order to have a grave love must
first have lived , and for me $ alas ! it is
yet to be born.
It is true , I have sworn to my wife
by the light of the moon and the stars
( I believe that is the regular thing to
do ) that I love her , but it was an awful
lie. I have told her , too , ahe was
beautiful , but that was a still more
awful lie. You'ought just to see her.
Two sins to my account , therefore.
YetI _ hope they will be forgiven me ,
for I did not commit them of my own
free will.
1 was born an orphan , I believe. I
never knew anything about my father
and mother. They must have existed ,
there can be no doubt of it , but that is
all I can impart concerning them.
An uncle adopted me , gave me a
frock , a cent every Sunday , and every
other day blows to inculcate virtue , this
being continued until I was 12 years
old and had partaken ot my first com
munion. Then my uncle said , "Now
you are no longer a child , " and a fort
night after my becoming a man I found
myself in a boarding-school , where for
three years I was a victim to the larger
scholars , and for another three years
the tyrant of the smaller ones , until
finally the high school opened its doors
to me.
"Study hard now , so that you will
soon get through.Willem , for you must
always bear in mind that you have not
the slightest claim to all I am giving
you , but have to thank my Kindness
alone for it all. "
So my uncle wrote me every month.
Whenever I passed a good examina-
< 'tion'Iwas : "That is aH right , but it
cost me enough. " And on everv pos
sible occasion and to everybody my
food uncle said , "This is my nephew ;
have brought him up , and , let him
study at my expense ; every year he
costs me two thousand francs , of which
I shall never see a single centime
again. "
Myunole treated me very well in
deed , and I was certainly grateful for
it ; he upraided me so often , however ,
for what he had done for me that al
last I could not endure him in spite oi
all my gratitude.
However , I finished my studies , and
the head of the examining ; board an
nounced Willem van denlJerghe as a
doctor of medicine. I lived with my
uncle , who in a fit of magnanimity al
lowed me to put my shingle on , his
door , and now indeed nothing was
wanting to my happiness but patients.
I waited patiently ior one , two three
- months , took rapid-walks through the
town to make believe that I had been
sent for , strained every nerve to suc
ceed. I was young , and I waited pa
tiently four or five months ; but pa
tience is not the virtue of all of us
mortals.
One afternoon. I sai quietly , in mj
consultation room and thought about
love and patients for what else oughl
a man to think about when he is twen >
ty-three years old and a doctor of nied
icine ? Suddenly my uncle's gruf
Toice called out : ,
"Come , dress up , Willem , put 01
your best coat and gloves , " andWillen
obeyed.
Together we went out of the house
passed through two or three streets
and stopped at last befere an old
fashioned mansion with a double stair
case leading to the door , where we ranj
the bell.
"Now , * just be very > polite to th <
" mVuncle's command
young lady , was
while a servant as old-fashioned as th <
house , introduced us into a room whicl
was poorly lighted and smelled ver
musty.
There sat behind a table Madami
Boedaart , a red-ribboned cap on he
head and a cat on her lap. I though
I had to be polite without delay , an <
was just about beginning when Mis
Boedaart appeared with a cap whosi
ribbons were redder even than thi
mother's. She wore a dress whicl
perhaps might have been becoming
to a pretty woman , but it looke <
awful on her. I put her age at twenty
seven , and as she happened to be onh
twenty-six and a half , my uncle re
marked that I always looked on thi
worst side.
I was as polite as I knew how to be
and Miss Anna Boedaart seemed satis
fied. Madame Boedaart styled me in
variably "dtctor , " and I heard her sa ]
to my uncle that she was quite pleasel
with me.
"What ugly women ! " I thought to
myself when we were on the stree
again. But I have the bad habit o
often thinking aloud , and this time ' .
did so again.
Ugly women ? " angrily repeated m ]
uncle. "Do you know , though , tha
the young lady expects to have tw <
hundred thousand ' francs , and do yoi
? " - .
call that ugly
It was the first time in my life I had
heard that any one with two hundred
thousand francs must be considered
beautiful. When we reached home
again , my uncle said : *
"Willem , you have been a bachelor
long enough ; now it is time for you to
marry. "
"Yes , uncle , " I replied ; "but to bo
married one must.finil.the woman , just
as patients are * m-ceaaary 6"make a
"Well-what about Mi = s r.ocilaurt ? "
spoke up my uncle with a ouiil- : meant
to1 be sly. "There is something i'oryou.
I think she is inclined to like you , and
then'your fortune would be made at
one stroke , my boy. "
"Yes , but she is a little too ugly , " I
objected rather timidly , .for I was-not
accustomed to contradicting. -
"Too ugly ? " snarled my uncle at me.
"She has two hundred thousand francs ,
and I am tired o | supporting you. You
have cost me money enough already ,
and you are not worth your money
yet"
There was nothing to be said to that ;
_ had to give way , and yesterday ]
spoke the final yes/
"Your fortune is made , young man , '
said to me this morning a man of fort }
years and much experience.
In truth I have a wife , a house , twr
dogs , a cat , ( my wife had to bring il
with her , she was attached to it )
and expectations of two hundred thous
and francs.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A year later Mother Boedaart said
of her son-in-law.
"He has become quite another man ;
I said long ago that he would change' . ' '
And indeed Willem 'had become quite
another man , a man after his wife's
heart. Mothers and daughters are
often wont to discourse on marriage.
The Boedaarts had had time enough ,
so they had gone deep into the subject.
"A good nusband , my dear child1
Mother Boedaart had said , "is difficult
to find ; a husband that is steady , stays
at home with his wife , leads a virtuous
and Christian life , is * a treasure on
earth. " And the daughter had pondered
over the qualities such a good husband
ought to have , had imagined a model
husband , and Willem van den Berghe
was the unlucky man whose fate it waste
to realize this model.
In the very first week his clothing
was reformed. Miss Anna had.always
had a holy horror of frivolous men ,
and she had invariably represented
them to'herself with a cap on then
heads , in a short coat , a pair of light
pantaloons , and a gaudy necktie. So
Willem's cap was given to a boy of the
street , his other garments adorned the
gardner and the baker's boy , and he
received a long coat , a gaily flowered
vest , a large hat , a big watch and s
white necktie. Thus arrayed he was
allowed on Sundays to go to mstss and
vespers with his wife.
Now he looked like a doctor , at least ,
Mother Boedaart observed ; the fonuui
foppish costume was not at all suit
able
Willem did not quite willingly make
himself ridiculous , but as it brough !
peace to the household he had "ir
God's name'put ] on the white necktie
In another matter , however , he offeree
a more obstinate resistance. This was
the society of his young friends , ir
which he found some distraction , am
could sometimes be merry for a fev
hours. From morning he lived in an
ticipation of the evening which he waite
to spend with them. His wife had no
objected very much in the beginning
but it was only postponed and not en
tirely given up.
Gradually the opinion arose that tin
husband came home too late , and there
after Willem started homeward punc
ually at half-past nine. Then it was
"Ah , you couldn't remain at home !
single evening ! " and at least once i
week Willem had to give up hi
friends.
At last one day he was summoned ti
Mother Boedaart.
"See here , Willem- ' she addressei
him in a solemn " tone , "when I gav-
my daughter" you , you promisei
that she. should Jive happily wit !
you. "
"Yes , mother , " responded Willem
"Now then do do -
, , you everything-1
make her life sweet and agreeable
Have you nothing to reproach yourse ]
with ? "
"No , mother , " replied Willem , aui
he might have mentioned the cigar h
had given up and the white necktie h
had put on , yet he preferred to awai
the storm.
"Then I must tell you right out,1
continued the mother in wrath , "tha
it is a shame to leave your wife alon
so much , while you waste your time i
saloons , and that you will bring th
poor girl to her grave. "
Willem was frightened by the idea c
being such a villain , and stammered :
"But , mother , I sit with her th
whole day. "
"Surely you don't see , though , hoi
pale and thin your wife is getting , an
how she is wasting away from dav t
day. "
.Willem indeed saw nothing of th
kind , but he saw enough of what was i
.store for him. He went home ; his wif
gave him a cross reception. In th
evening he * went out , and when he cam
home his wife was sick abed. As h
was going out again the next evenin
supper was not yet ready. So it wer
on , and his wife looked daggers at hir
all the time , and his mother-in-lai
preached incessantly. Willem gave u
seeing his friends , and now lives in at
cordance with his wife's wishes.
Every morning he rises at eigl
o'clock and goes about in his dressing
gown until twelve. Then he is allowe <
to go out ; at one o'clock sharp , ho\
ever , he must be back again , for .hi
wife has laid down the rule never t
wait with the meals. In. the afternoo :
he may do what he pleases , but not g
out , for then his wife would have to si
alone ; nor read , for then he could no
talk with his wife ; and not sleep , fo
he is still too young for that. Othei
wise he can do anything he likes fo
example , hol'd the yarn or look afte
the stove.
The evening excursions are don
away once for all , and there is no nee *
of his working. Every fortnight ther
is a company of 'old wives and ruaic
ens , where lotto1 is played the who !
evening. ' - , -
His uncle , who makes him a visit
from time to time , although madame
cannot endure too many strangers in
the house , slaps him on the shoulder
and - *
says ,
"You see now , young man , that your ;
uncle wasn't a fool , after all , and don't
you have a happy life ? To have noth
ing to do , to find your bread already
earned as soon as you get up in the
morning indeed , my young friend ,
that is such a match as ono would
gladly look * for with a lantern. You
were surely born to be lucky. "
In truth , Willem has a wife , a
mother-in-law , a house , two dogs , two
cats ( his wife has got another one
she has no children ! ) and. expectations
of two hundred thousand francs. The
happy young man !
Sensible Women.
London Queen.
A sensible woman take life philo
sophically , which is by no means the
same as tepidly or unfeelingly. What
she can conquer by calm , strong re
sistance she does ; what she cannot
conquer she submits to patiently and
quietly. Where a shriek would free
her from danger she would scream as
loudly as her neighbors ; but where it
would do nothing for her own safety
and much for the distraction of those
who heard her , she keeps a calm sough ,
and betrays nothing even to the reeds.
If fond of the country and herfate lands
tier at Bermondsey , she makes the best
of what she has , and refuses to shape
the wood of her house tree into a cross
she can never forget. Certainly , Ber
mondsey is not inviting , and hei
father's place down in Somersetshire
was a very heaven of rural beauty. But
if she cannot have it ? What is the use
of crying over the inevitable , of desiring
he impossible , of trying to churn the
spilt milk into butter ? When she mar
ried her Janus she married into the
contingencies of a clergyman's life ,
among which is counted the necessity
of taking that which will give a suffi
cient amount of family bread. Again ,
f , on the other hand , she has been used
; o the intellectual life and vivacity oi
London , she does not moon away hei
ife in unavailing regrets when she is
sent down to that desolate , companionless -
panionless living on the edge oi
; he fens , but sets herself tti
make the garden trim and the house
pretty and-nomelike within , and when
she is forced to look out she speaks oi
the sense of expanse in the sky and not
of the ugly dreariness of the land
scape , nor yet of the desolate solitude
of her surroundings. She is far too
sensible to spend her strength in re
grets , and she thinks the best way of
bearing burdens of all kinds is to pad
them with cheerfulness , and not to cut
lier shou1ders sore with unavailing ir
ritation. Things which have to be
done at any cost , things which have to
be borne at any price , she does not bear
with the wise courage of common
sense , by which she avoids the pains
courted by fretfulness , and , in making
the best of things , has always some
thing in her hand which at least is rel
atively good.Cheerful -and fond of
children , as all sensible women are and
must be to deserve the style and name ,
she is the life of the small brood when
they gather in little groups or isolated
units , stiff , strange and shy , in the
drawing-room , where they are the
guests of the hour. If the hostess is
inapt , the sensible woman supplies her
deficiencies and takes her place natu
rally , as of right and by orderly ar
rangement of things. No one knows
how she does it , but in a short time she
has put all in train , when the ball is set
rolling , and the fun of the fair has be
gun. The children look to her as
their leader , and she knows how
to smooth' away all the difficulties
which may arise. She encourages th (
timid , helps the awkward , gently re
presses the rude , tames into due saber
dination , without extinguishing , th (
rampant spirits of the boisterous. Sh <
makes herself the center and the soul ,
but always with moderation ; and what
without her , would have been a fiascc
for dullness or a riot for rudeness , sh <
makes into an "evening of which thi
little creatures talk for weeks after , am
remember fet years as a glimpse inl <
fairyland. So in'any home where shi
may be with young people long pas
mere childhood. If a wet day come
she sets everything in motion , and turn
what else would have been gloom an <
ennui into pleasure and brisk amuse
ment. And all this without any kin <
of self-assertion , though , being a scnsi
ble woman , she is rationally fond o
amusement for her own share. Still
it is as much or rather more for other
than for herself that she works a
"making things go , " and her desire t <
amuse others is stronger than even he
own wish to be amused. The sensibl
woman takes a healthy interest in he
neighbors , but she is TJV no means ;
gossip , still less a scandal-monger
At no time will she be brought int
the folly of discussiug me
tives , or judging of things by th
seamy side of appearances. And i
persistently bored by those who find
pleasure in seeing all things a travel
and all people more or less scoundrel
undetected , she does her best to initi
gate what she can Hot prevent. Sh
has strong principles , but she is not a :
active proselyter. She lets others thin
for themselves , and , only when calle
on to testify , raises her own privat
flag aloft. She knows the differenc
between constancyand aggression , and
with the courage of her opinions , ha
also the modesty of reticence. ' Sh
treats her servants as , in a certai
sensje , her friends , her children , whil
still keeping the reins of home goverr
ment in her own hands. But they al
know that when they do their duty , sh
will rewaid them , or at least recogniz
by kind words and hearty acknowledg
ment that they have done well , and tha
when they neglect it she .will rebuk
them. She will be neither indifferer
on the one side nor remiss on the other
and thus her household always feels an
knows that her eyes are open and he
heart is warm.
The Countess Euphemia Ballestrer
has translated the queen's book int
German , and Victoria herself has re
vised and corrected this edition , whic
shortly will be published at Stuttgart
Baron Tauchnitz will also bring it OD
in English at Leipsic.
I
JUPITER'S INFLUENCE.
This ISeaatiful Star Creates the Greatest
Happiness in This World.
PltubnrgUbimtcb.
The planet Jupiter is known among
astrologers as the Great Fortune and is ,
under Providence , the author of most
of the prosperity and happiness which
-he people of this world enjoy. It is a
.arge and very beautiful star , so promi
nent that it cannot bo mistaken , as
ihere is something vary peculiary bril
liant and benign in the rays of light
which it sheds. Jupiter is south now
about 915 o'clock.
It is a strong point in favor of astro
logical doctrine that a system of read
ing the stars has existed among all the
people of earth from the remotest times
peoples so widely apart that it does
not seem there could ever have been
any communication between them. But
notwithstanding this the principles of
faith are the same. Jupiter is always ,
under whatever name known , the good
planet , * and Saturn the planet of evil ;
Venus fortunate , and Mars the reverse.
Nowhere in hieroglyphics , writings or
traditions do we find that Jupiter
brought down unpropitious conditions ,
or that Saturn was considered friendly
or beneficent. This shows again what
lias already been demonstrated , that
the art was founded on demonstration ,
or , as some believe , had a divine origin.
The nature of Jupiter is benevolent ,
and he produces honest , kindly , frank ,
and high-minded natures. From this
fact we obtain our word jovial. He
rules over the fifth day of
the week Thor's day , or Thurs
day a most ancient belief. He
produces clear and warm weather ,
and if the reader will take the trouble
to watch the almanac he will find that
whenever Jupiter forms a major aspect
with the sun the temperature always
moderates and generally stays pleasant
for several days. The number five in
Hebrew , affixed to the fifth day of the
week , Chemash , is composed of chem ,
warmth , and ash , a star. Now , an
other curious thing is that Jupiter was
bhe star of religion , ruling priests and
holy things , and if we.reverse the first
letters in Chemash we have meschach ,
to anoint with oil , the root being cog
nate with mech , fat. Mashich means
aimointed , and from it we get Messiah ,
and the relation between annointing
and the investiture of priests is thus at
once seen. The old Hebrew name of
Jupiter was Gad , and it is referred to
in the Bible. Pisces is his house , and
in Genesis xxx. , 12 and 13 , we read :
"And bore Zilpah , servant to Leah , to
Jacob , a son ; and said Leah , 'cometh
Sad , ' and she called the name of him
Sad. " This is the old Nulgate trans
lation , and Abarbanel says : "This Gad
s the star Jupiter.In the analogy
3etween the twelve signs sf the Zodiac
and the twelve sons of Jacob , we read
that the eleventh was Gad , "a troops oi
army , " and reversing it we get 'Dag ,
which mjans a fish , and alludes , oi
sourse , to Pisces and the planet Jupi-
er.
er.To be successful in life it is absolute
ly necessary that this planet , Jupiter ,
should be strongly situated at the na
tivity. If rising , or in the inidheaveh ,
and aspecting at the same time either
of the luminaries , the prosperity will
be unbounded. For wealth , the best
position he can have is in the second
house , but he must not be in square 01
opposition to Mars or Saturn. He is
also favorably situated when in the
western angle , particularly with people
ple who have to deal much with Ihe
world.
The general character of Jupitei
when-ascending is to produce a person
of noble , honest , generous , and ha
mane sentiments ; but a good deal de
pends on what sign the planet is in and
with waat other bodies he is configa
rated. In the fiery triplicity ( Sagit-
tory , Aries and Leo ) the native or sub
ject is bold , good-natured , sincere
hearty in his manner and to be depend
ed upon. In the earthy ( Taurus , Vir
go and Capricorn ) the person is not sc
true , more selfish and politic , reservet
and unreliable. In the watery ( Pisces
Scorpio and TCancer ) a careless ant
jolly temperament , fond of conviviality
free and even reckless with money , am
as a rule extremely lucky. In the air
there is a magnanimous , just and faith
ful disposition , a kind heart and libera
mind. They also are singularly fortu
nate.
Some writers on astrology say tha
Jupiter in evil aspect to the sun o :
moon is a bad position that will pre
vent success ; but this is an error. It i
not propitious in one respect inamucl
as it wastes the means or causes losse ;
and expenses ; but any aspect of Jupi
ter to the luminaries is bettor than nom
because there is certain to be ultimate
success.
Mars appears to bethemostinjuriou ;
planet to Jupiter , as when configurate <
by the square or opposition , or whei
in conjunction , he causes extravaganci
and a foolish indulgence in Hazard
betting and speculation. The evil ray ;
of Saturn will frequently bring abou
bankruptcy , but the trine or sextil i
excellent for dealing in real estate o ;
engaging in agriculture. Venus am
Jupiter , when together , give mucl
good taste. It is curious that these tw <
planets , rising at the same time , wil
produce remarkably pretty blue eyes
Jupiter in aspect to Mercury exercisei
great influence upon the mind , causing
not only unusual ability , but honesty
candor and a strong sense of justice
In judging the prospects offortuni
in a nativitylt is customary for the as
trologer first to note if there are man ]
planets in angles , and then if there ar <
many above the earth and oriental , foi
all these are good indications. Nex
he will see whether the sun and mooi
have any configuration with Jupiter
It must be likewise observed whethei
the planets are for the most part sig ni
fied , that is , in signs with which the ]
have sympathy. Jupiter , for instance
is signified in Sagittory and Pisces , be
cause they are his houses ; but the re
verse in Gemini and Virgo , becausi
those two cast the opposition ray t <
him when he is domiciliated. It is pro
pitious to find the planets , particularl ]
the moon , moving rapidly. Neithe :
she nor the sun are ever "retrograde
but the others frequently are , and itde
lays success.
The sun and moon in trine from an
glea , and either of them exalted is cei
tain to give rank and power. The sun
in good aspect to Mars from fiery signs
win give high military position. The
sun in conjunction with Jupiter in the
sign Cancer , and the moon at the same
time in Scorpio , or if , Jupiter bo in
trUe with both from Pisces , it is an ab
solute assurance of wealth and pros
perity. These are some lew of the
rules , and give an idea of the nice
judgment and discretion that must be
9mployed in studying the testimonies.
On the other hand , those who have
the planets in cadent houses , occidental
or under the earth , or whoso luminaries
have no ray from Jupiter , load poor
and insignificant lives. If Saturn
should be prominent they know little
but trouble. The signs themselves as
they occupy the angles and con tain the
planets have likewise an appreciable
influence over the fortune. Not many
people borij under Capricorn and
Pisces are , as a general rule , lucky.
Taurus , Scorpio , Cancer and Virgo are
fair ; but better than these arc Sagit
tory , Aries , Gemini , Libra and Aqua-
ries. A majority of the planets in the
cardinal signs authority and fame
usually follow ; next in this m.ttter
come the fixed signs ; but those which
are known as the common signs have
much less influence.
There are sound philosophic reasons
for these definitions , and they are not
mere arbitrary arrangements , as they
may appear.
Drunk in a Ping Hat.
Bill Nye In Puck.
This world is filled with woe every
where you go. Sorrow is piled up in
the fence corners on every road. Un
availing regret and red-nosed remorse
inhabit the cot of the tie-chopper as
well as the cut-glass cage of the mil
lionaire. The woods are full of disap
pointment. The earth is convulsed
with the universal sob , and the roads
are muddy with tears. But I do not
call to mind a more touching picture of
unavailing misery and ruin and hope
less chaos than'the plug hat that has
endeavored to keep sober and maintain
its self-respect while its owner is drunk.
A. plug hat can stand prosperity , and
shine forth joyously while nature smiles.
That's the place where it seems to
thiive. A tall silk hat looks well on a
thrifty man with a clean collar , but it
cannot stand dissipation.
1 once knew a plug hat that had
been respected by every one , and had
won its way upward by steady endeavor.
No one knew aught against it till one
evening , in an evil hour , it consented
to attend a banquet , and all at once its
joyous career ended. It met nothing
but distrust and cool neglect every
where after that.
Drink seems to make a man tem
porarily , unnaturally exhilarated. Dur
ing the temporary exhilaration he de
sires to attract attention by eating lob
ster salad out of his own hat , and
sitting down on his neighbor's.
The demon rum is bad enough on
the coatings of the stomach , but it is
even more disastrous to the tall hat.
A man may mix up in a crowd and
carry off an overdose of valley tan in a
soft hat or cap , but the silk hat will
proclaim it upon the housetops and ad
vertise it to the gaping , wondering
world. It has a way of getting back
on the rear elevation of the head , 01
over the bridge of the nose , or of hang
ing coqucttishly on one ear that says tc
the eagle-eyed public , "I am chock-
full. "
I cannot call to mind a more power
ful lecture on temperance than the
silent pantomime of a man trying tc
hang his plug hat on an invisible peg ir
his own hall after he had been watch
ing the returns three years ago. I sav
that he was excited and nervously un
strung when he came in , but I did nol
fully recognize it until he began tc
hang his hat on the smooth wall.
At first he laughed in a good-natured
way at his own awkwardness and hung
it up again carefully ; but at last he be
came irritated about it , and almost for
got himself enough to swear , but con
trolled himself. Finding , however ,
that it refused to hang up , and that il
seemed rather restless , anyhow , he pul
it in the corner of the hall with the
crown up , pinned it to the floor witt
his umbrella , and heaved a sigh of re
lief. Then he took off his overcoat ,
and , through clerical error , pulled ofl
his dress coat also. I showed him his
mistake and offered to assist him bacls
into his apparel , but he said he hadn'l
got so old and feeble yet that he could
not dress himself.
Later on he came- into the parloi
wearing a linen ulster , with the bell
drooping behind him like the broken
harness hanging to a shipwrecked and
stranded mule. His wife looked at hire
in a way that froze his blood. This
startled him so that he stepped back a
pace or two , tangled his'feet in the cir-
cingle , clutched wildly at the emptj
gas-light , but missed it , and sat dowr
in a tall majolica cuspidor.
There were three games of whist go
ing on when he fell , and there was a
good deal of excitement over the play
ing ; but , after he had been pulled oul
of the American tear-jug and led away ,
every one of the twelve whist-players
had forgotten what the trump was.
They say that he has abandoned pol
itics since then , and that now he doesn'l
care whether we have any more No
vember elections or not. I asked hire
once if" he would be active during the
1881 campaign , as usual , and he said
he thought not. He said a mat
couldn't afford to be too active in c
political campaign. His constitutior
wouldn't stand it.
At that time he didn't care mucl :
whether the American people had f
president or not. If every public-spir
ited voter had got to work himself uj
into a state of nervous excitability anc
prostration where reason tottered on iti
throne , he thought that we needed
reform.
Those who wished to furnish reason ;
to totter on their thrones for the na
tional central committee at so mucl
per tot , could do so ; he , for one , didn'
propose to farm out his immortal sou
and plug hat to the party if 60,000,00 (
people had to stand four years undei
the administration ef a setting hen.
Guitean's Ghost.
Washington Republican.
A weird and remarkable scene oc
curred in the rotunda of the jail yes
torday afternoon. Holy communion
was administered to Frank Miner , the
colored wife murderer , in the presence
of a large congregation of colored per
sons , by members of'Roberts' Colored
Young Men's Christian association and
the pastor of , St. Paul's colored Baptist
church. During the unusual cere
mony of adminiotering the last Lord's
supper to a condemned murderer sev
eral strange incidents occurred. In
the midst of a solemn prayer the loud
squealing of a rat echoed through the
building , and the next instant one of
those uncanny animals rushed out into
the rotunda from the direction of the
cell formerly occupie'd by Guiteau.
Alter a hasty survey of the situation
the rat rushed through the congrega
tion , and upon reaching Miner , wno
with bowed head was listening to the
prayer , proceeded to climb up the leg
of his trousers. The murderer was
strangely affected by the event , , and
after he had struck the animal and
driven it off ho trembled visibly.
* M
The Western Wool Growers.
The Western wool growers , in con
vention at Denver , adopted the follow
ing memorial to congress :
Whereas , The wool growers of Colorado
rado , Kansas , Utah , Wyoming ; , Nebraska - .
ka , Idaho , New Mexico and Minnesota |
assembled in convention in the city of j
Denver , representing 7,500,000 sheep (
and $50,000.000 invested capital , and
an annual yield of 85,000,000 pounds of
wool ; and
Whereas , Said industry has been
greatly injured by the reduction of the
tariff bill of May , 1883 , and now threat
ened with total destruction by the Mor
risen tariff bill , just reported to the \
house of representatives by the committee - \
mittee of ways and means ; be it , there
fore ,
Resolved , That we , the wool growers
in convention assembled , are opposed
to the provisions of the Morrison tariff
bill now before congress , which aims
to mak'e n further reduction of five per
cent on all foreign wools and woolens ,
and that we ask a reduction of the
fariff of 1807 in its entirety as far as it
relates to wools and woolens , by which ,
tor the first time in the industrial his
tory of the country , equitable relations
were established between the duties on
wool and those on woolen goods.
Resolved , That we pledge ourselves
to work for and to aid in the restoration
of the tariff of 1867 on wools and wool
ens , and request all persons engaged
in or interested in the wool-growing in
dustry to co-operate with us.
Resolved , That we , as wool-growers
and citizens , pledge ourselves to stand
by all committees and associations in
giving full and complete protection to
all American industries in need of the
same , and cordially invite their cooperation
eration in this matter.
The memorial concludes with an ap
peal to the western senators and repre
sentatives in congress to do all in their
power to restore the tariff of 1867.
The Hon. E. M. Merrill , of Kansas ,
was selected to present the memorial to il
congress. jj
A Bride's Modesty Overcome.
Christian Journal. '
"No , George , I am not going to take " * i
my shoes off. " "You'd better , dear- -
est. " "No , I shan't. Just like as not
the train will run off the track. What
a place for a lady to sleep in. Catch
me taking off ray shoes , nor anything
else this night. Why , anybody can
come along here and pull these curtains
right back. " "Why , dear , it is just
as private as in your own room. No
one disturbs any one else on. a sleeper.
You know I trav Jed a great deal be
fore we were married. Now , come ,
pet , let me untie your shoes for you. "
"You shan't , George. I tell you 1
won't take my shoes off , and L won't ;
so there. I am going to sit up here
and lean against this pillow and look
out of this window all night , and I'm
ready dressed for breakfast in the
morning. You can sleep down there ,
if you want to. " He argued , reasoned ,
entreated and commanded , but the six-
hour bride remained firm , and it was
evident that a dark cloud was on the
face of the young honeymoon. The
last thing we heard before going to
sleep was the beginning of what he
said was his last appeal. We didn't
hear the end of it , but awoke the next
morning and found all quiet in the next
berth. All the other passengers were
soon up , and the porter had their beds
metamorphozed into seats , but still the
bridal couple slept. Finally they were '
aroused by the conductor , and" after '
foity minutes floundering in the lower
bunk , and frequent whispered inquiries
lor missing articles , conspicuous among ; 1
which " other shoe " there 1
was "my , appeared - "
peared a plump little woman with
frowsy hair and a pair of pretty-blushes
which deepened and widened surpris
ingly as she met the gaze of her fellow-
passengers. It was apparent that she
had relented.
Climbed Him at Last.
Through Mail.
"Ever in Californy ? " asked u long ,
larik , lean , lantern-jawed tramp of a
man on Center street the other dav.
"
"No. "
"Wan't in the boom o' ' 49-eh ? "
"No. "
"Never war in the mines in Colorado
or New Mexico , eh ? "
"No. "
"Don't you know nothin , ' 'bout min-
in' a tall ? "
"No. "
"Well , I be darned ! " said the tramp.
"Never was in the war , was ye ? "
"Never. "
"Knock every button off my pants if
this don't beat all ! Ain't a member of
the melish ? "
"I am not a member of the inelish. "
"Wall , blast-my hat , if you ain't the
hardest man to work for a"drink I ever
struck. Say , pard , ain't yer never
been in the penitentiary ? "
"Never have. "
"Well , try me for a hess thief if I
ever see the like. Yer the fust man I
ever struck that hadn't done suthin'
mean or been to Californy , or in the
war , one or t'other. Say , pard ,
what's yer bizness ? ' '
"I am a bank cashier from New Jer
sey. "
"Jewhillikens ! Iknowd I'd climb
yer yit. An' yer never been in quad ?
Well , by jinks , yer orterset 'em up ! "
and he did.