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About The Omaha morning bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927 | View Entire Issue (Nov. 18, 1923)
Social Law Should Forbid Girls to Wed _Before 22, Says Gertrude Atherton Kditor's Note: iiertrude Atherton, who for many tear* has held a |H>«itlon in tlie first rank of living American au thors. and whom* latest book. “Black Oxen." dealing with the rejuvenation of woman, him made a sensational impres sion upon tlie reading public, curries forward in this article the discussion of what is the best age for ninrriuge, which was introduced last week by M*m Heberts Kinehart. Mrs. Kinehart. under the title “The Best Age for Marriage—19 or 29?” told the story of her own romance and marriage at 19. and how. as the mother of three children, she had already made a start upon her career by 29. She raised the question as to what the ef fect would have been Inith noon lief self and her career if she had delayed her marriage until 29. Mrs. lthinehart will continue with her theme and her personal story in later articles, and Mrs. Atherton also will he heard again in this unusual forum iiihiii the subject of love, marriage and the modern woman. By GKKTRITIB ATHERTON. I AM OPPOSED to censorship in any form that curtails the liberty of intelligent adults, but the maximum of human hap piness would he increased if there were an unwritten social law for bidding girls to marry before, say, the age of 22: a law, the violation of which involved the loss of social prestige. No girl under that age knows enough to know her own mind. She may be bright, clever, even highly intelligent, but no natural gift takes the place of experience. Compare any brilliant girl of 18 with an equally endowed woman of 30. Her disadvantage is pitiful. Moreover, the older woman has the Inestima ble advantage of knowing that she does not know everything and has realised that she must go on learn ing as long as she lives. I fix the marriageable age at 22 for several reasons. In the first place It gives a girl time to exhaust the irresponsible pleasures of youth before assuming the responsi bilities of matrimony, heavy at best I am now talking of th« daughters of parents whoso means permit them to enjoy their youth in the fashion to which every girl is en titled By 22, unless a moron (and the time will come when all niofons will be painlessly destroyed), she will he ready to "settle down ” As for that large army of girls who are obliged to go out into the world and earn their bread, they will have an even better opportunity to study men and life at first hand, and are even less likely to make a mistake in choosing a life partner than at 18. Mot Wise Enough at Eighteen. A girl has by no means reached complete mental maturity at 22, but she is at least 10 years older In ex perience and or'.ontntion than when she teft the schoolroom. The young er a girl the more abject a victim she is to tho mere urge of the race. Nature !s conscienceless and ruth less. And what is civilization for If it is nut to get ahead of nature! With every generation girls are older than their predecessors at the same age. We hear so much sensa tional criticism of the flapper of today that w-e have leapt to the conclusion that never in the world was there anything like her before. But glance through the literature of fiction and memoirs. Ask our mothers and grandmothers. The same horrified criticism has greeted every generation of girls since the first mother announced passionate ly: "In rny young days such things were unheard of!" Bo Wise and hard and calculating Is the young girl of toilny that she has a far better prospect of making a success of her life than any gen eration of girls In the past. And of happiness. For these character istics are a mere protective armor, partly affected, partly tho result of complex modern conditions. At 22 she will be wiser and older than her mother was at that nge. Nevertheless, In spite of her pre GERTRIDE ATHERTON Author of “Black Oxen," “The Conqueror," “Aristocrats," "Ancestors," “The White Morning," "The IJvtng I’resent," “A Daughter of the Vine,” etc., etc. ERTRUDE ATHERTON, recognized as one of the ablest and most distinguished of American writers, has for more than a quarter of a century' been recording the observations made by her keenly criti cal eyes. The quickened tempo of American life during the last two dec odes. shifting values in morals, manners and customs, the cataclysm of the great war—all these have served to stimulate her genius. From "The Conqueror," a semi historical novel based on the life of Alexander Hamil ton, to "Black Oxen," the most talked of book of the year, Gertrude Ather ton has grown steadily in the power of presenting life. Mrs. Atherton is descended of pioneer American stock. Her mother was a Franklin, great grand daughter of a brother of Benjamin Frank lin. Her father, Thomas Lyman Horn, also was descended of revolution ary Nordic ancestors, one of whom founded Stonington, Conn. Born in San Francisco on October SO, 1857—her father and grand father having been pioneers of the great western migration in the '50s. —Mrs. Atherton was educated In the schools of California and In a semi nary at Lexington. Ky. But her real background of culture came from Stephen Franklin, her grandfather. "I was educated by my grandfather," she writes, "and as he had the finest private library in the state, and was determined I should be well read. I owe the more serious turn of my mind to him, although I rebelled bitterly at the time . . ." Before she had finished school at I^xington she was married to G. II. B. Atherton. Mrs. Atherton has referred to her marriage as "one of the most Important incidents of my school life." Mr. Atherton died a few years later and Mrs. Atherton went to New York to enter upon her lit erary career. Her first books dwelt upon California scenes, and the influences of her childhood are found In her early novels. "But," she confesses, “life at its highest pitch of civilisation interests me most." •cocity at IS, she la by no means wise enough then to select her mate, because no amount of pre cocity can take the place of that positive experience the years alone give; of a certain maturity, not only of the ego, but of the Intellect. The 1‘erll of Illusions. In the unfettered Intimacy that now prevails between girls and young men, surely no young girl, no matter how romantic beneath her protective armor, can have any illu sions regarding the male by the time she has entered her 20s; and Illu sions are the very worst prepara tion for matrimony in the devil's whole repertoire. So far no nation hut the French has accepted this great fact and outwitted nature. Then, if a girl marries at li. she has developed character enough to bring up her children properly, and to begin at the beginning. With her a baby is not a doll, as it is to the very young mother, but a hu man atom with every poteotiality for good and evil. It has ten thousand thousand an cestors and it is for this reason that the spoilt child of eminently respectable parents not infrequently turns out a criminal. The more mature mother has had time to ob serve and appreciate that the badly brought up child is the helpless vict.m of a cruel injustice and is handicapped in the struggle of life that must come later. The three essentials for success In life are .intelligence, character and poise, and not the least of these is poise. But if it is not acquired early in life it is apt to be lacking altogether, and sooner or later will neutralize all that may be affected by the other two. And to parents as well as to heredity the strugglers of this struggling world owe this prime essential. A woman may have her three or even her five children before she is well into her 30s, and from that time on she may have as many re curring youths as she demands. Certainly she will find a far deeper capacity for real and intelligent en joyment of life than in those callow years when her sense of values was nil. ■\ Career With the “Second Wind." With the arts, simple and scien tific, known to all women today, she will have preserved the appear ance of youth—all healthy and sane women invariably look 10 or even 20 years younger than their age— and there is a far greater satisfac tion In looking than in merely being young. "Feeling young" de pends entirely upon health and a lively mind. And* today the re sources of women are infinite. Gone is the day when a woman was side-tracked and finished by the time she was 40. The club women started that revolution, and life has progressed by leaps and bounds since then. A woman be gins. in these days, to live her personal life when the heaviest part of her sex debt is discharged, and as her children grow older an 1 are more and more away from her until they leave her altogether, her opportunities increase with every passing year. It is possible that all women, save the brainless, will look for ward to some sort of persona! career when the time comes to take their second wind. She will have fulfilled the primary purpose for which she was created, the per sistence of the race; now comes her opportunity to learn the mean ing of civilization. Shirking Responsibilities On the other hand, as time go? on no doubt more and more women will deliberately foreswear marriage altogether and choose the career in its place. But this is a shirk ing of responsibilities, and unpar donable in this country where the dangers to the republic at the hands of alien races loom so por tentously. It is all very well to be a free agent, and It is the most precious of all privileges, but as a matter of fact no such mortal exists. No one. unless he isolates himself in the wilderness, can avoid the interacting responsibility s of society. If he attempts It he becomes an outlaw. Modem conditions make it pos sible for at woman to do her duty by her race—her, not the race— and still have her career. To be gin It, moreover, when she is wise enough to reduce mistakes to a minimum. Moreover, no woman is complete who has not had children, and completeness of experience is essential to rounded success. Chil dren are valuable If only for dc veloping the human sympathies and enriching one's knowledge of life and human nature. It is an economical mistake to avoid the ex perienee. To accomplish anything one must begin at the beginning. There are isolated case# of old maids and barren women who have made a conspicuous success of themselves, but they are the exceptions that prove the rule. Arid there ig no telling how much mere dis tinguished they might have, been m their life work if they hid lie gun by discharging th ,r primary debt. (hildren for the Nation. -Vs statistics show that the great Nordic race that founded this re public is being bred out by the Alpines and Mediterraneans that form the ^najor part of our im migration stream, it is now not oniv the patriotic but the parental duty of every young woman of the old American stock to have from three to five children. It is irrational to say they cannot afford it. for the poor afford it and get along somehow. Certainly there are many thou sands of couples in the United States, either wealthy or well to-do. who limit their families for selfish reasons only, and thousands more who could have at least three children if they were willing to exert in the right direction the principle of self sacrifice- that is the iot of every mortal. If men and women with one child, to whom they are uxorious ly devoted, would reflect that they are doing their best to deprive that child of future happiness and op portunity. by delivering its country over to a breed of revolutionists, intent upon destroying individual ity in that most stultifying of all ideals, communism, to say nothing of depriving them of every >iher heritage, surely they would make the necessary sacrifices unless they were morons and incapable of thought. No substitute so far conceived compares with the republican ideal in the opportunities it gives men and women for happiness and un limited opportunity. In practice it may be faulty, human nature being what it is; it has suf fered many abuses but one has only to look over its record of achievement and compiare that both with its own defects and with the history of the rest of the globe, ancient and mbdern, to realize that it is still better than any form of government the world has ever known. Also, that all substitutes so far put forward not only offer nothing In the way of improve ment, but are infinitely worse. Younger at Forty Than at Thirty It this were taught, first in the family,' and then In the schorls, the future of this country would look less dark Anything car be done with plastic mind. Spoilt, ba !• mannered children are detested by all but their fond parents. Whose fault is it? Not theirs It is as easy to Inculcate good manners In children as -an appe tite for the morning cereal. And it would be quite as easy to bring them up with a sense of duty to their race and to the future of their country, and to inspire th-m with a passion for large families What are the sacrifices? Wo mans vanity. But that is too old an argument for these days. There are SO different ways for preserving the figure, or restoring it. quite aside from dieting. Before long we shall be a nation of sylphs. Pleasure? "But I want to enjoy life while I am young not he tied down with a lot of children." The answer is easy. Don't marry be fore you are Si; and endeavor to realise that when you are SO, if you have kept your health and sanity, you will feel younger than you did at SO. and at 40 younger than at SO. The women f a generation ago could not say this, but we can. (Conytifki, ifty) _ Smuggler’s Ghost Haunts British Inn Portsmouth, Kng., Nov. 17.—There nro simple souls who believe that at Intervals since the reign of Georg© III n 'spirit" has haunted Bere Block Dell, a copse situated nt>out a mile out of Kmsworth, on the main road to llavant. Twelve years ago. when an '‘ap parition" was seen by an Kmsworth fisherman. who was returning home late at night, tho villagers banded themselves together In a determined effort to hunt the phan tom down. The only reward which crowned their efforts was to find a naturalist catching moths nt night with a large not. Tho "ghost" has appeared again. On Saturday night a cyclist was scared by a "filmy hooded" figure, which blocked his course on the road. %he countryside is full of rumors. Koral people declare that. they, also have seen the apparition, and dur ing the week end Here Block Dell * linn been visited hy hundreds of folks from Portsmouth and district. Crowds watched in the darkness laat night, but saw nothing. Many years ago there was a notorious inn known us Highwayman's Inn. near this spot. The house has long since vanished, but the story of a mur der which occurred Just outside it has been handed down. This inn, according to lorn 1 le gend. was the rendezvous of high wavmrn and smugglers. One night ft French ship was wrecked off the coast. Smugglers promptly seized the goods which were washed ashore, and a French sailor. John IVtiblenu, who was found lying on the shingle, became the victim of ft man named John Watkins, who drugged him to the inn and stabbed him. Paris has 43 fewer hotels than l»efoi-e the ant BRITISH TKACHKR TKM.S WOMEN TO RE Kill ENDS WITH THEIR MIRRORS Birmingham, Nov. 17.—' The mir ror must not bo regarded as a mere symbol of vanity,” said Miss Ewing Matheson in an address to Binning ham women teachers. ‘ The woman of middle age should make plenty of use of it. It is good both for herself and for young peo ple. "It is extraordinarily Important for the older woman to wear the right kind of clothes, and set' that her expression is not allowed to become sour. "Her lips may be compressed only because she is battling with some problem of her own. but how are others to know that? "Tile sight of miserable looking old maids sometimes drives girls luto most unfortunate marriages " The modern American home has ”1 different pieces of electrical ap pnratus doing many kinds of housc 'vork. This does not include elec tric lights. “Eternal Triangle" Case at Zoo ! Iaxndon. Nov. IT.—An attempt to form a family circle out of the "eternal triangle" is being made at the too. Bobbie, a Capuchin mon key in the small mammal house, has been given two companions of the opposite sex from whom to se loot a mate—Queen ie. of his own species, and Betty a common macaque Probably, from the love of nos elty. Bobbie has set his heart up on Betty, but. as might he sup posed, Quisenie refuses to submit to such an order of things Betty has a very caressing hal'.t of smoothing Bobbie's woolly crani um. which sets hint chattering with delight, but xxhenexer such a tete a tete Is In pra'gress Queen Is in variably butts In" and spitefully disarranges Hobble's hx-hs If Bobbie tries to console her he recelv os ex en XTorse treatment from Betty. »x' he Is generally to be found in a state of dishevel ment. Hobble has a dumbbell for a toy, and of late has been malting use of It as a Mundgeon with which to smash the lumps of pep permint rock which come his way. The keeper thinks he is getting in trim to deal with the trials and tribulations of married life The official Is keeping watch on dis tracted H'hby in case he may seek to solve the problem of "the' eternal triangle" by the aid of the dumb!-ell. While the plow has changed Title in more than J.OOe ye.ira. a unique farming tool has been Invented in Prance which attacks the problem in a new way. The plow is re placed by a number of metal fing ers which dig deep into the earth, break it up and prepare it for pTiu: in*, all in one operation The taboi of plowing and cultivating * th.' done quickly and efficiently