The Loup City northwestern. (Loup City, Neb.) 189?-1917, November 07, 1902, Image 7
Brignts Witty Dctort. W Once in the course of a speech which ' "as punctuated by interruptions in parliament John Bright was saying: ' Personally 1 do not feel disposed to wage war against these Philistines.” "lien an unruly member of his audi ence shouted “Heehaw!" “If, how ever,' Mr. Bright continued without a pause, “my friend at the back of the ball will lend me one of his Jaws I shall be encouraged to reconsider my attitude, in view of the historic suc cess of Samson when provided with a similar weapon.” Iowa Farms $4 Per Acre Cash, balanuo # crop till paid, MUI.HALL, Sioux City, la. An intellectual feast is a sorry apology to an empty stomach. ARE TOUR CLOTHES PADEOf Use Red Crms Ball Blue an 1 make them white again. Large i oz. package, 5 cents. Don’t try to reform people; set them a good example. No one would ever ho bothered with con stipation if every one know liow naturally end quiokiy Burdock Blood Bitters regu lates the stomach un<l bowels Many an octogenarian can attribute bis longevity to the fart that he never called another man a liar. Fiske Favored Going Around. The late John Fiske, the historian, was a man of enormous stature and extremely sensitive about any refer ence to his unusual size. On one oc casion when he was visiting a friend at his home in a beautiful town in Connecticut the hostess and her daugh ter invited Mr. Fiske to drive with them one morning. The road was a picturesque one, which winds along the river at the foot of the mountains. At one point the hostess suggested that the party alight and walk a short distance through the field to get a par ticularly attractive view. Around this field was a high fence, with no open ing but a narrow stile. The ladies got through and turned to wait for their guest. For a moment he contemplated the opening; *o squeeze through was impossible, to climb over was equally impracticable. Finally his deep bass voice broke the silence: “Ladies, 1 think we would better continue our drive." Direction in London. In London and throughout the tight little island the words “up” and “down” have a peculiar significance. In going to London from any part of England you go “up.” In traveling in any direction from the capital you go "down.” So In London itself every thing goes “up” if it goes in the direc tion of the bank—that is, the Bank of England—and going from that center toward any of the points of the com pass is to go “down.” The word bank, which is no\ only always spelled with a capital “B,” but is always uttered with an impressive ness that sugegsta an inital letter of the largest type, may be said to be in a sense interchangeable with city, a term of equal dignity and value in the eyes of Englishmen, and likewise in variably adorned with a capital “C.” The City docs not mean London by any means. It means a certain lim ited section of London, the part where business is mainly carried on and where the great financial institutions stand. Helped Everybody. Gainesville, Tex., Oct. 27th.—Mrs. L. E. Burton, formerly of Eureka, Kan sas, has been at B07 Gladstone street, this city, for some time. While here Mrs. Burton has been the means of doing much good by introducing to her sick friends a remedy which it seems is very popular in Kansas, but which has not been very much heard of in this neighborhood. It Is called Dodd’s Kidney Pills and in every case where it has been used it has produced won derful results. Mrs. Burton has good reason to speak well of Dodd’s Kidney Pills, for they have done much for her and her family. She says: “I must tell every body what Dodd's Kidney Pills have done for me and for as many of my friends as have used them. “I had a very bad case of kidney trouble for which I had been doctor ing for a long time without benefit. I saw Dodd's Kidney Pills recommend ed. I tried them and was completely cured. My mother and my brother were ill and they took them and were soon well again. "Dodd’s Kidney Pills have done much for ua.” Chinese at Columbia University. Prof. Frederick Hirth has begun in Columbia university the work of in structing students in the Chinese lan guage, written and spoken. Later he intends to conduct courses on Chinese literature and studies in the arts and industries of the Orientals. Prof. Hirth denies that a knowledge of the Chinese language is particularly diffi cult of attainment, though, as he re marked to his first class, “students must not expect to chat with their laundrymen in a few weeks." PI«a permanently cured. So fit* or nerToueueee after rl I 3 n™t day'* uhnr Hr. Kline * Great Ner»« Kotor ir. Send for KKKK •3.00 trial bottle an.l treatise. Ha. li.. II Klixk, Ltd., Ml Arch Street. Philadelphia, P». Hungarian Wives’ Wigs. Here in Essex, Ludlow, Suffolk, Broome and Delaney streets, says the Now York Press, we meet a great many women of all ages who wear wigs of perfectly straight hair plastered to their shaven heads. They are Hun garian wives. The wig is put on im mediately after the marriage ceremony to tell their world that they are wedded and faithful to their husbands. The most beautiful hair is shaved off end the head covered with the cheap est of wigs in order to render these women plain and unattractive to other men. It is a religion to appear as ugly as possible as a defense against designing males. “A dose in time saves lives ” Dr Wood’* Norway Piuo Svrup; nature's remedy for roughs', colds, pulmonary diseases of every sort. ____ Never judge pictures and horses by their frames. GREAT AMERICAN TIE PUMPKIN IS ONCE MORE THfc MONARCH OF ALU. Immencc Consumption of the Luscious Dainty Throughout the Lend—Fig urea Show the Extent of Its Won droua Popularity. The pumpkin pie is cace more abroad in the land. On the counters of the confectioners, in the windows of the dairy lunches and on the em bossed menus of the hotels where wealth and fashion ilock, it again takes its honored place, to gladden with its presc ice the heart of old and young. New York—pre-eminent in most things—is the greatest pumpkin pic eating city in the world. During the season, from September to February, there are, on an average, more than 10.000 pumpkin pies a day cuten in that city. Estimating each pi ? to con tain live pieces, an army of something like 75,000 pumpkin eaters musteri daily. To make 15,000 pies a day requires 25.000 pounds of pumpkin and 10,000 quarts of milk. Such dry, prosaic and exact things as figure; are hardly in keeping with the poetic pumpkin; but it is interesting to figure cut the fact that in the four month; or so during which the pumpkin pie flourishes there are about 3,000,000 pounds of the fiuit used to make the pies which are eat en in that city, and a million and a quarter quarts of milk. With a pencil and an imagination interesting figures of the consumption of the United States at large might be worked out. In the days when p?opIe who are now middle-aged were boys—for it is to the male sex primarily that the pumpkin pie lia3 always appealed— pumpkins were raised as a "stolen crop,” a few seeds placed at intervals in a field of Indian corn or potatoes often giving, besides the regular crop, a ton of pumpkins. But now the pumpkin, though still to seme extent raised in the old way, has attained the dignity of being con sidered worthy to be raised for itself alone. Pumpkin farms are numerous all through the eoniral and New Eng land states, and yield good returns to their proprietors. The largest pumpkin farm near New York is in Monmouth county, N. J.. where a tract of 300 acres is given over principally to the raising of pump kins. The cultivation of the fruit, too, is no longer a haphazard affair, but is conducted on scientific principles, the soil being thoroughly fertilized with the special view of providing the kind of richness needed in the pumpkin. LUCK RESTORES A DIAMOND. Found by Its Owner in Street Where She Lost it Five Years Ago. The luckiest woman in the west is Mrs. Anna M. Scott of Denver, Col. Five years ago, in returning from a party, she lost a diamond earring worth $200. In looking for something else a few days ago she found the dia mond in the street where she had dropped it so long before. Hundreds of persons had passed over the spot in the meantime. Kain and snow had buried the jewel in the sai d, and at just the right time the rain again washed the diamond clean for Mrs. Scott to find it. Other per sons had looked in vain, when it was lost years ago. “I was not looking for it,” said the owner, “I was looking for a little ring that my daughter thought she had lost. As I could not find the ring. I went over the ground rather carefully. ••Suddenly something sparkling caught my eye and then I cried right out loud, ‘Why, there's my diamond!1 "I was so surprised to see it that I could really hardly believe that I was awake, or that it was 1902 in stead of 1897.” Wedding Gifts in Coff i Box. A young married woman in one of the neighboring towns must be given credit for originality in securing means for transporting her wedding gifts. Her new home is in a distant city, and she recently returned to her old home to pack her presents. The problem presented itself of finding something of sufficient size to hold them. A boxmaker was consulted, and it was found that it would cost about $3 to make a box to order such as she desired. Finally it was sug gested that a common coffin box might answer the purpose. The young woman Jumped at the suggestion and invested $2.50 in a long, plain pine box. The neighbors of the young woman's mother were startled to see the undertaker drive up and take the big, long box into the house. A num ber of hurried calls were made before the mystery was solved. The bride says she will make good use of the coffin box after she returns to her home by utilizing it as a couch.— Springfield (Mass.) Republican. Strange New Herbs. The gardens and fields of Yucatan are filled with succulent vegetables and odorous herbs unknown to the outer world. In the cultivated fields at the proper seasons ara grown classes of Indian corn, beans, squashes and tubers for which we have nc name, for the reason that we have never seen or heard of them, reports the Pittsburg Dispatch. The forests and Jungles contain fruits that, excel lent even In their wild state, could be made delicious by scientific care and cultivation. There are half a score of wild fruits that offer more promis ing results than did the bitter wild almond, the progenitor of the peach. CASE NO. 30.611, C. E. Cc'»s, Dealer In Grain and Feed; Address, 505 South Water Street, Akron, Ohio—Cured in 1896. Mr. Boies says: "Ever since the Civil War 1 have had attacks of kid ney and bladder trouble, decidedly worse during the last two or three years. Although I consulted physi-! cians, some of whom told me I was verging on Bright's disease, and l was continually using standard remedies,, the excruciating aching just across the kidneys, which radiated to the shoulder blades still exited. As might be expected, when my kidneys were In a disturbed condition there was a distressing and Inconvenient difficulty with the action of the kidney secre tions. A box of Doan's Kidney Pills, procured at l.ampartcr & Co.'s drug store, brought such a decided change within a week that I continued the treatment. The last attack, and it was particularly aggravated, disap peared.” Cure Confirmed Four Years After. Four years later Mr. Boies says: in the spring of 18f‘G I made a public ! statement of my experience with Doan’s Kidney Pills. This remedy cured me of terrible aching in the kid neys, in the small of my back, in the muscles of the shoulder blades, and in the limbs. During the years that have gone by I can conscientiously say there have been no recurrences of my old trouble. My confidence in Doan's Kidney Pills is stronger than ever, not only from my personal ex perience, but from the experience of many others in Akron, which have come to my notice." A FREE TRIAL of this great Kid ney medicine which cured Mr. Boies, will be mailed on application to any part of the United States. Address Foster-Mil burn Co., Buffalo, N. Y. For sale by all druggists, price 50 cents per box. Wickedest Man in New York. "The" Allen (his name is Theodore), who is called the "wickedest man in New York,” is very sick, and there is some hope that he may die. Allen is xn extraordinary person, whose record proves that law doesn't catch its chief violators, for he has led a consistent "riniinai life for most of ids TO years. He recently said that, so far as he ’ouid remember, he had been arrested lixty-eight timer, and indicted very often, but never convicted of nny •barge, although he is perhaps the most notorious gambler in the city. His pistol shot Ills partner in a gamb ling house on Broadway, some years ago, but Allen said it was an accident, and the court accepted his assertion. Booth Tarkington’s Sketches. Booth Tarkington. the novelist, al ways sketches his stories in pictures before he writes them in words, and ill of his stories lie hidden away in picture former. He is unwilling to ■show these drawings even to intimate "mends. His publishers have urged him to allow them to use his own irawings for illustration of his books, but he wouldn't hear of it, wouldn't even let them see any of the pictures. At last he promised them one of the Vanrevel sketches, but was canny mough not to send It until too late for insertion in the book. Didn’t Recognize the Description. .Judge W. H. Simmons, of San Fran •isco, has an enviable talent as a story 'oiler, and has never been known to relate a “chestnut” unless by request. Due of nis yarns is of a citizens who lied, leaving a somewhat unenviable name. The preacher who was called in to officiate at the funeral deemed it his duty to eulogize the deceased. He had proceeded some distance with his laudatory remarks, when an astonished friend of the dead man leaned over to an acquaintance and whispered: "Say. Billy, are there two funerals here today?" Marriage Lengthens Life. That marrriage is more conducive to long life in women than single life is shown by the fact that of the thirty two women of over 100 years, revealed by Germany's last census, twenty-nine were widows and one married, leaving only two old maids. scan ot Persia j'rpuiar. Since ascending tbs throne vacated by the assassination of his predeces sor, Nassred Din, six years ago, the shah of Persia ha3 shown himself to be a man of progressive ideas. He has greatly reduced taxation, organ ized a postal and customs service, built a university and several schools, equipped telegraph lines, and, more important still, has made it possible fer his subjects to obtain justice in the courts. He shows no taint of the cruelty which so often characterizes Oriental rulers, and altogether has won from his people a measure of personal loyalty and affection never accorded to any of his predecessors on the throne. If you wish beautiful, dear, white clothes use Red Cross Ball Blue. Large U 03. package, 5 cents. Noted British Sculstor. Albert Bruce-Joy, who is sixty years of age, is one of the most active of English sculptors. He has given Bow her Gladstone, Birmingham her Bright, Westminster Abbey its Matthew Ar nold, Stratford-on-Avon her Mary An derson and has set up numerous other statues in England and in America. Born in Dublin, ho became a pupil of Poley and studied three years in Home, since when he lias traveled much in America. He is one of the sturdiest of vegetarians. JUNE TINT BUTTER COLOR makes top of the market butter. If we could see ourselves as others see us mirrors would be a drug on the market. Low Rates for HomcseekersI On the first and third Tuesdays of each month—One-way and Round Trip—to the Great Southwest. Write for illustrated literature and particu lars. JameB Barker, Gen'l Pass. & Tkt. Agt., M., K. & T. Ry., St. Louis. A Preacher Sheriff-Elect. The Rev. Charles S. Cummings, shcr Iff-eleet of Androscoggin county, Maine, proposes to enforce the prohi bition law as rigidly as did the "par son" sheriff of Cumberland county, the late Rev. Mr. Pearson. Mr. Cummings was elected by a large majority after having been nominated by the repub lican convention on the 202d ballot. Stops the Cough and Works Otf the Celil Laxative Hrotuo Quinine Tablets. Price 23a The Shah as a Chess Player. The shah of Persia is probably the best chess player of royal blood in the world. Even when in Paris he found time to indulge in the game every now and then, but he says that Europeans canr.ot play it. “It is a royal game, a divine game,” he is reported to have said the other day, “but it is a game that was not made for Christians.” Mrs. Wlmlown *ootTi1ng Syrup. | For children teething, softens tnc reduces In* Humiliation, allays pain,cure* wind colic. 25c a bottle. The Irish Curse. An Irish authority thus defines as an expert the effects of a well delivered curse: “The belief among the ancient Irish was that a curse once pronounced must fall in some direction. If It has been deserved by him on whom it is pronounced it will fall on nim sooner or later, but if it is has not. then it will return upon the person who pro nounced it. They compare it to a wedge with which a woodman cleaves timber. If it has room to go, it will go and cleave the wood, but if it ha3 not it will fly out and strike the wood man himself, who is driving it, be tween the eyes.” Scold bend is an eczema of the scalp—very severe sometimes, but it can be cured. , Doan’s Ointment, quick and permanent ia its results. At uny drug store, 50 cents. — Au "Edward Everett Hale Club." Some of the Boston boys have formed an Edward Everett Hale base ball club. They wanted uniforms and got up a raffle to raise the price. They asked Dr. Hale to take 50 cents' worth of tickets. He wrote back: “1 do not like to subscribe, to what seems to me a lottery. But I enclose $5 for the un iforms. I am much pleased that you formed the club and that you gave it my name.” A woman's first love affair makes or mars her life. Mrs. Tupman, a prominent lady |($| of Richmond, Va., a great sufferer with woman’s troubles, tells of her cure by Lydia E. Pmfeham's Vegetable Compound. “Dear Mrs. Pixkiiam: — For some years I suffered with backache, severe bearing-down pains, leucorrlicea, and falling of tlio womb. I tried many remedies, but nothing gave any positive relief. “I commenced taking I.ydiu E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound in June, 1901. Wheh I had taken the lirst half bottle, I felt a vast im provement, and have now taken ten bottles with the result that I feel like a new woman. When I commenced taking the Vegetable Com pound I felt all worn out and was fast approaching complete nervous collapse. I weighed only 98 pounds. Now 1 weigh 109J pounds and am improving every day. I gladly testify to the benefits received.”— Mrs. It. C. Tupman, 423 West 30th St, Richmond, Va. When a medicine has been successful in more than a million eases, is it justice to yourself to say, without trying it, “I do not believe it would help me”? Surely you cannot wish to remain weak and sick and discour aged, exhausted with each day’s work. You have some derange ment of the feminine organism, and Lydia Ik Pinklinm’s Vege table Compound w ill help you just ns surely as it has others. Mrs. W. II. Pelhaln, .Tr., 108 E. Baker St., Richmond, Va., says i “ Dear Mrs. Pinkiiam :—I must say that I do not believe there is any female medicine to compare with Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Cora . pound, and I return to you mv heartfelt thanks for what your medicine has done for me. lie fore taking the Vegetable Compound I was so badly l olf that I thought I could not live muen K longer. The little work I had to do was a sjL burden to me. I suffered with irregular E menstruation and leucorrhcea, which caused n an irritation of the parts. I looked like one who had consumption, but I do r.ct look like that now’, and 1 owe it all to your wonder ful medicine. “I took only six bottles, but it has mad© me feel liko a new perron. I thank „ God that there in such a female helper ^ as you.” Ha fliArAfnrA. 1»a1:ava#1 ©T1 women who are ill that Lydia E. Pinkliam’s Vegetable Compound is the medicine they should take. It has stood the test of time, and it lias hundreds of thousands of cures to its credit. 'Women should consider it unwise to use any other medicine. Mrs. Pinkhnm, whoso address is Lynn, Mass., will answer cheer fully and without cost all letters addressed to her by sick women. Perhaps she has just the knowledge that will help your ease — try her to-day — it costs nothing. (hrnnfl FORFEIT If cannot forthwith nrndncc th« original letter* and ■ijnatares at V HIIIIII wbuv« tei ..muiiiaU, which will prove tliclr absolute cenuineuean. vWwUU L}tlla hi. i'mkliitui JUudlcine Co., ILjnu, Uuw !'STANBERRY^NORMAir I AND ! BUSINESS COLLEGE. i 1 STAN BERRY. - - _M<880_UWI._ A Standard College for Young Ladies and uectlemen C of small moan*. Hoard, room and tuition, I year, tt i 34, a Cotletrcof Shorthand,Commerce. M uAir.hloeuUoa.ete. > 80 teachers. Mudern bulldlntts. Catalog free. 5 Box U. D. B. BOBBINS, XL 8., Brcoldant. > Our SALESMEN Make *50.0(1 Qaii y A ‘J M< T1 WANTKU CAtALoOl K FREE. Hr I W# ■ W ■ < r»yonPurlr*ll<i4de. Kwllf ltwor4« f»r. rWttir**a»«iFr*»*»* »h •>* Al^pruNUMianw. IrtaA M, WllliAou Aio. lUk>A(o,lll. ltepu !i* DATniTO HUBS tt CO.. Omaha, Nobr. « *1 1 LFB I U ^'* ®"ee l ilies. Successful. 1 *1 ■ * » i’atenuau*d. Advice free, j HDODCV NEW DISCOVERY: Kivos \ B^ VX a^ W* I quick relief and cures worm | •sses. Book of testimonials and 10 DAYS’ treatment r&££. I)r.H.H.QKE£B B SOHB,Box K,Atlanta,G» I -OKEW5 JUNIPER BITTERS Rellcooa All ntatraaa of tha Stonmcli and t*«rto4|r cal l)la<ir4rra. FLAVOR uNsuxrAraa Bold Eaarrwhcra. CBfSf.FNT CBIMICJU CO, Omaha. Nab. ... . — Why Syrup.of Fi£s tke-besf family laxative It is pure. It is gentle. It is pleasant. It is efficacious. It is not expensive. It is good for children. It is excellent for ladies. It is convenient for business men. It is perfectly safe under all circumstances. It is used by millions of families the world over. It stands highest, as a laxative, with physicians. If you use it you have the best laxative the world produces. Because i Its component parts are all wholesome. It acts gently without unpleasant after-effects. It is wholly free from objectionable substances. It contains the laxative principles of plants. It contains the carminative principles of plants. It contains wholesome aromatic liquids which are agreeable and refreshing to the taste. All are pure. All are delicately blended. All are skillfully and scientifically compounded. Its value is due to our method of manufacture and to the originality and simplicity of the combination. To get its beneficial effects — buy the genuine. Manufactured by San Frnnclsco. Cal. Louisville. Ky. New York. N. Y. FOR SALE BY ALL LEADING DRUGGISTS.