The Loup City northwestern. (Loup City, Neb.) 189?-1917, January 18, 1901, Image 7
■ The Mystery of a Proposal.' BY J. NOEL JOHNSON. (Copyrighted. 1900, Daily Story Pub, Co.) “Of all strange featers about human cater to me,” said aunt Jemima Mead ers, “the quarest one Is that them folks who have came off first best from the band o' nater, Is the kind that sets the least value on the work, while what nater has been stingy, hard, an’ ugly, in turnin’ out a Job, thar you’ll find most redicilous self-apreslashun. The sweetest flowers hide In ugly nooks, while dog-fennel, jimson-weed, and burdock crowS along the high way." ‘T’ve allers noticed that ar,” re turned old Nance Latimer, giving her clay pipe fresh feed. “I’ve allers no ticed that hang-back dispersitlon on the part of the feater-favored people. Everybody wants ter chase arter ’em, an’ that keeps ’em, like a dogged cat, in er chronic state o’ skeer. I’m most ’Bhamed ter let it git out, Mis’ Mead ers, but, when I wus a gal, I wuz more retirin’ nor a crawfish. When young fellers wud come swarmin’ ter our house, I’d go up the ladder to the left like a squirrel up er tree, leavin’ my plain but brave sisters to bear the brunt. As er consequince, they was carried off years afore me, an’ I'd er still bin single ef it hadn’t er bin for Mam’s trick. One day, when she seed Joe Latimer coinin’, she took down the ladder as he was cornin’ in at the door. He caught me an wouldn’t let me go till I blessed him with a prom ise.” Aunt Jemima lifted her bandana, dropped a smile among its folds, and proceeded: “I hearn o’ that—yas, take that Ed gar Taggart for a sample. He’s tall, broad, fine shaped, an’ is graceful as a pine when bowin’ and scrapin’ to a soft wind; still, look how he tries to sneak away his beauty! He enters the church house like a timid child pullin’ back from a stranger. Gals all focus on him as he enters, an’ jest set drinkin’ his beauty while he snooks off in er dark corner an’ sets blushln like a smoky sunset. On the other hand, here comes Tim Bradford, who is ugly enough to make an ole family nag run away. His white hair sticks out in wisps, like paint breshes. TTI « • 1_I. III.. XUO iipo the edges of wet sole leather forced (together. His ears stick out like fans. His eyes run out and his forehead \ runs hack. His j nose, long, thin, high an’ crooked, * loons line u nau Nance Latimer, been whittled from a clapboard with a dull knife, and stuck on his dough-colored face by a drunkin’ hand. Still ho enters a church, an’, in ever look an’ motion, seems ter announce: ‘Here I come, the king of grace an’ booty!’ An’ his ugly impudence car ries him to the sides of the pirtiest gals when church is over. While others sigh an’ wish they could, he goes right in an’ dares an’ does. “It ain’t no serprise to me thet he’s engaged to Dolly Madden, one of the pirtiest gals on the cricks. While poor Edgar Taggart who loves Emma Sal yers, the sweetest gal in the county, an' is worshipped by her, stands around, like a sick rooster in a cold rain, an’ never offers to go with her. ‘Hit makes me sorry for both of 'em. She dees all a modest gal can do to toll him up. but he never gits in grabbin’ distance of her. She’s tried goin’ with others to spur up his jealousy, but it only skeers him fudder off. Hits a plum pity. His bashfulness promises to leave him in miserable o!e bachelor hood, an’ will force poor Ella, at some hopeless hour, into a marriage with some cheeky thing she don't want. Hut my son Fred, the lawer out to Vance burg, tole me when he was home last Sunday that he wa3 goin’ to fix on a plan to git ’em together, an’ ef he sots in on it, he’ll work it. Him an’ Edgar allers wuz the greatest cronies in the world, an’ its through love for Ed an’ friendship for Emma that will cause him to fix up some rascally trick to get ’em yoked. Can’t fool them sharp lawyers, I tell ye!” About a week after the above chat between Aunt Jemima Meaders and old Mis’ Latimer, an elegant looking “town gent” called at the home of Ed gar Taggart. "Why, hello, Fred! Come in, sir,” effusively greeted Edgar Taggart when he appeared at the door in response to the former’s knock. “Of course I’ll go in, and have a chair and ’make my self to hum,”’ laughingly spoke the young lawyer. “What’s the news. Fred?” Inquired Edgar, as a conversation started. “I hear you are to get married right away.” ”W-h-a-t!” exclaimed Edgar, spread ing his blue eyes. “That’s all I hear, and it’s news enough for one time. 1 knew for years you were crazy about one another, and I’d feared you would never muster up the spunk to propose, but I congratu late you on a species of courage I thought entirely finer match was never made in the mountains. You are as good as you look, and she looks as good as she is, and that's a great deal to say indeed—but not a j wu U1UV.U, UU, don’t sit there “W-h-a-t! with your eyes popping, and your jaw on your collar bone! You don’t know how I know but here’s her answer. I was at her house not over an hour ago—in fact I carried your letter of proposal to her, and as I wanted this long-standing case closed up—filed awny, a* fO were— I Insisted ! on her answer instanter." “You took my letter of proposal! What do j»ou mean, cianf Are you crazy?" | "I may bs in some rerpects. It's a theory of some high grade philoso phers that on some point or another, 1 we’re all crazy. I’m crazy, I think, after a little beauty out to town, 1 whose father has a fortune, and you’re doubtless crazy about Emma. You've let your mind run on her long enough, the Lord knows! But drop that crazy stare and stare at this”: Edward took an unsealed envelope thrown In his lap by the lawyer and read: My Dearest Edgar: As you doubtless surmise, I accept your proposal to marry, although to wed this evening, I had thought a little sudden. . Mr. Meaders, who brought me your let ter, Insists that It ts not too sudden, however. He says you have your rea sons for desiring a hasty marriage. I shall not insist on knowing them. I’ll be ready at h:S0 ibis evening. Forever yours, EMMA SALYERS. Well, that beats me!” exclaimed the young man, astonishment, incredulity and delight all jumbled together in his expression. “I see nothing mysterious about it. A young man writes a letter to a girl proposing marriage. A friend takes it where it belongs, and returns with the girl’s letter accepting with pleas ure—simplest thing in the world.” "I never wrote her any letter. I’ll swear it!” “Don’t try to throw the girl new, young man, because you feel too cow ardly to do what your heart and honor commands—no; nor you shouldn’t swear either, for I'm county examiner, and authorized to administer oaths, and I have your own letter here that would convict you of false swearing. Here, isn’t this your handwriting?” Edgar took the proffered slip of pa per and read as follows: My Dearest Emma: As you know, for years I have loved you—secretly, madly loved you! I have tried to muster up the courage to tell you so In words, but always faiied. Now, I've finally decided to write you. Will you be my wife? And If so, would you object to the ceremony to-morrow even ing? Yours ever. EDGAR TAGGART. The man put his hand to his fore head, as if he felt his reason going. Filially, he said: “Fred, I’d be the moat delighted man In the world did I not fear I was either in a dream or going daft. This is my handwriting, still, Fred, I tell you I never wrote it.” “Then I fear for your reason myself. I stonned here ves terday and found all of you away.” “Yes; some one was here. Mother M said she missed all W her custard pies 111 from the safe.” "Just so; well, after eating all I “ wauteu, i Happen- ^ ed to look oa your ,‘Un'3oubtPdl>--" writing desk, and saw this letter ad dressed and unsealed. I opened it, and read it. I feared you’d never have courage to mail it, and so I took the liberty of a iife-long chum to benefit you everlastingly by carrying It to her myself. So here we are, ready for a wedding.” Edgar’s great joy was dampened by the mystery of his letter. He knew he had never written it, still any one who knew his chirography would have sworn it was his handwriting. While he still sat, helpless and stun ned before the mystery, the young lawyer’s puzzled look vanished and his face blazed with the light of discov ery. “Edgar,” he shouted, gleefully rub bing his hands together, “I’ll bet I have a solution to the mystery that will relieve you from the menace of in sanity. You wrote the letter while In a somnambulistic state. You know you used to get up at midnight, when we camped out that season, cutting cord wood, and would sometimes get a fire started, preparatory to breakfast-get ting when I would awaken you." “That’s so!’’ cried Edgar, brighten ing, “and I was up and all over the place night before last.” “During which time you wrote this proposal?” “ Undoubtedly.” • • • • • After the ceremony, the lawyer took Edgar to one side and admitted he had forged the letter, being so familiar with the groom’s handwriting. “Just name your first boy for me is ail I ask as a return favor.’’ Prickly Pear n Nuisance. One of the most serious difficulties in the way of land settlement in some parts of Australia is said to be an obnoxious plant called the prickly pear. As a pest to farmers it may be fairly classed with the rabbits. It has taken possession of whole tracts of country and the settler has to fight a pitched battle for every acre he calls his own. A single fruit brings forth thirty—sixty and even a hundred fold of good productive seed. All herbage may droop, die and disappear in the oven of an Australian drouth, but the pear survives, flourishes and carries on its processes of expansion and re production with unconcern. In the fierce “struggle for life” when a drouth Is devastating the land this pest is a living example of the survival of the “unfittest.” It was brought to Australia, like the rabbit, either for use or ornament, and it has become a plague and a pestilence. Its extermi nation in the colony of Queensland, at least, is a question of national import ance. Onr t'onsnl at Ilariioot. Dr. Thomas H. Norton, United States consul at Harpoot, is forty-nine years old and a graduate of Hamilton col lege. He was for seventeen years pro fessor of chemistry in Cincinnati uni versity. Tba Lady Lieutenant Quit*. The only wonyui with the rank of lieutenant in the army has resigned. Dr. Anita Newcomb McGee, daughter of Simon Nwcomb McGee, the astron omer, was appointed acting assistant surgeon in the United army In August, 1898, to aid in the selection and equip ment of a corps of army nurses for field and hospital work. The appoint ment carried with it the rank of first ileutenant and the right to wear the shoulder straps and uniform of an officer of that grade, a right for which she did not avail herself. The work for which she was appointed having now been fairly organized, Dr. McGee has resigned, and no successor will be named. Carrying Any the Monument. The Washington monument is said to be slowly but surely disappearing. Vandals are carrying it away in their pockets. The interior is constantly being defaced. In many places the inscriptions on stones contributed by the various states of the union, as well as those Sent by organizations, have been greatly injured. From the appearance of some of the marble it has been attacked with inron instru ments. Letters have been broken off the tablets. While the great bulk of the damage Is doubtless done by relic hunters, some of the highly polished stones have been injured simply for the sake of defacing them. A VETERAN SPEAKS. The Honorable Mnuri It. Crane of Ta coma, Hath., Telle How Old Soldiers May Help Themselves. Tacoma, Wash., Jan. 5, 1901.—(Spe cial.)—‘T used to have Heart Disease, but thanks to Dodd's Kidney Pills 1 now have Heart’s Ease. "Five years ago I was a continual sufferer of Heart Disease. Exposure during the war, and a tendency to grow over fleshy, had greatly aggravated this dread disease. T often had to sit up half the night. I had It so bad when I would lie down. Life looked pretty blue to me. as I thought there was no relief, until one day I read an advertisement of Dodd’s Kidney Pills. I bought a box that same day, and It was the best day’s work I ever did. Before I had used all the first box I could eat and sleep better than I had done for many years, and after three months’ faithful treatment, my health was completely restored. I am an old man now, but my step Is as elastic and my brain as clear as when 1 was thirty years of age.” these are the words or the Hon. Moses B. Crane, secretary of Odin Lodge, No. 123, I. O. O. F. of this city. The Hon. Mr. Crane is also Senior Vice-Commander of G. A. It. Post No. 5. Tacoma. Those who know Mr. Crane have the fullest confidence in his honesty and truthfulness, and know that he would not give this unsolicited testimonial unless he had actually experienced the relief which he indicates in his letter. Dodd’s Kidney Pills are having a won derful sale among Mr. Crane's friends —and their name is legion—in this part of the country. There does not seem to be a single case of Heart Dis ease, Kidney or Bladder Weakness, or Rheumatism, that Dodd's Kidney Pills do not permanently cure. The candidate who expresses him self is often beaten by another who pays the freight. For starching fine linen use Magnetic Starch. Many a man starts out to gather wool and gets fleeced himself. PUTNAM FADELESS DYES do not spot, streak or give your goods an un evenly dyed appearance. An old toper says he envies acorns because they always remain in their cups until they drop. 11 The average man thinks other peo ple need church more than he Uoea. TV* pit* IB > Week ■nil «xp«n»e« to meu wlih rlgt to introduce our Poi mbt Conform). Javbllb lira. Co , Ocut 1>, l'AS.Oh A, KaKAAA. A set of false teeth is an emblem of time. The beneficial result* of Oarfleld Tea upon the system are apparent after a few day* ' use: T1U0 COMPLEXION 18 CLEARED FOR THE BLOOD HAS BEEN PURIFIED. The man who possesses a million Is a capital fellow. BITS Prrmanrni'y < ure«i. tc f t» or i.ervnnravwafTe* flrwt dry * u»« of l»r. rvilnv'H i«rr*t Nervi* Ke«t<>?er. Beni! f'-r Ki<KK Bt.OO t'Ul bottle *n<t treatm*. bn. iL IL Kia.Mt. Ltd.. 9J1 Area St.. 1 tUi*UeiDbi% i’n. Every little vice i3 the subject of a lot of advice. The favorite for restoring life and color to the hair If 1 * a k k nit Hair Ualkam. lii.NDJtKi.oKNt>, the best cure for corns. 15cIt. The oftener a inan is in the wrong the louder he crows when he happens to be right. TO CURE A COLD IN ONE DAY. Taltc '.AXATIVR BROMc UUJNUOC Tabi.kts. All druggists refund the money if it fulls to cure. E. W. Drove's signature is on the box. She. No matter how changeable a man may be he always wants a little more change. $148 will buy new Upright piano on easy payments. Write for catalogues. Schmoller & Mueller, 1313 Farnam street, Omaha. * ■ - - love doesn’t laugh at the minister, and he Is love’s locksmith. Throw physic to the dops—if vou don’t want the dogR—but If you want ifood ulgcKiion chew Ueeuiuu'H Pepsin Uum. A schoolboy says there are teo many switches on the road to knowledge. Ceafne.s Cannot Bo Cared by local applications, us they cannot reach the diseu-ed portion of the ear. There 1* only one way to cure deafness, and that Is by consti tutional remedies. Deafness is caused by an Inflamed condition of the mucus lining of the Eustachian Tube When this tube is lnflnmed you have a rumidinr sound or Imperfect hear ing. nnd when It Is entirely closed deafness Is the result, anil unless the Inflammation can be taken out and this tube restored to Its normal condition, hearing will be destroyed forever; nine cases out of ten are caused bv catarrh, which la nothing but an Inflamed condition of the mucus surfaces. We will give fine Hundred Dollars for any case of Deafness (caused by catarrh) that cannot be cured by Hall's Catarrh Cure. Send for slrculars, free. F. J. CHENEY & CO., Toledo. O. Sold by Druggists, 75e. Hall's Family Pills are the best. When a tricky jockey holds the reins the race isn't always to the swift Plso's Cure Is the host medicine we ever used for all affections of the thro it and Iuiirb.—Wm. O. ENDSnSY. Vanburen, lad., Feb. 10, 1900. Some men are so very good that it is a question what they are good for. Magnetic Starch is the very best laundry starch in the world. More Mexican Explorations. Professor Frederick SCarr, of the University of Chicago, with a photo grapher and guide, has gone on an other visit of investigation among the unknown tribes of Mexico. He will be absent half a year, and experts to complete with his journey his studies of the South Mexican Indians. What Do the Children Ilrlnk? Don't give them toa or coffee. Have yon tried tne new food drink called GUAlN-Of It is delicious mid nourishing, and takes the ! place of coffee. The more Graiu-O you give I the children the moro health you distribute through their systems. Grain-O Is made of : pure grains, and when properly prepared ; tastes like the choice grades of coffee, but | costs about % as much. All grocers sell it. lie and Hoc. Iowa’s Oldest Voter. In a newspaper hunt for the oldest voter in Iowa, Wiliam Zimmer, of Clinton, has been found, who says his first vote was cast for James Monroe in 1820. He whs then living in New York state, and had just passed his 21st year, which would make him now above 100 years of age. The rest of the country is challenged to pro duce a voter who can beat this record. (This picture tolls its own story of sisterly affection. The older girl, just budding into womanhood, has suffered great ly with thoso irregularities and menstrual difficulties which sap the life of so many young women. Lydia E. Pinkliam’s Vegetable Compound can always be relied upon to restore health to women who thus suffer. It is a sovereign euro for the worst forms of female complaints,—that bearing-down feeling, weak back, falling and displacement of the womb, inflammation of the ovaries, and all troubles of the uterus or womb. It dissolves and expels tumors from the uterus in the early stage of develop ment and checks any tendency to cancerous humors. Iti subdues excitability, nervous prostration, and tones up the entire female system. Could anything prove more clearly the of* flclency of Mrsm Plnkham's Medicine than the following strong statement of Grace Stansbury7 “ Hear Mrs. Pinkham I was a sufferer from female weakness for about a year and a half. I have tried doctors and patent medicines, but nothing helped me. 1 underwent the horrors of local treatment, but re ceived no benefit. My ailment was pronounced ulceration of the womb. _ -.. .. .. -. I suffered from intense pains in tho womb and ovaries, ana tne oacuache was dreadful. I had ieuoorrhooa in its worst form. Finally, I grew so weak 1 hnd to keep my bed. The pains were so hard as to almost cause spasms. When I could endure the pains no longer, I was given morphine. My memory grew short and I gave up all hope of getting well. Thus I dragged along. To please my sister 1 wrote to Mrs. Piukham for advice. Her answer came, but menntime I was taken worse and was under the doctor’s care for a while. “After reading Mrs, Pinkham’s letter, I con cluded to try her medicine. After taking two bottles I fait much better; but after using six bottles 1 was cured. All of my friends think my WTUr -fTir _y r jp^-^ w - | cure uiiuubi uuruvuiuun. i iiiaiiu. yuu very in ucn | CRACE e STANbBURY | for your timely advice and wish you prosperity i--- in your noble work, for surely it is a blessing to broken-down women. I have full and complete faith in the Lydia E. Pli\khnm Vegetable Compound.”—Uiiacie li. Stansbukt, HeringtoUj Kansas. Ifl B3HI iWh d*K /fita llriAl A HR Owing to thr fact that some tktptical V B H 1 A M grt Ba |i mJw I^KII P*0P‘e have from time to time questioned fi s 3A 8! ffl til *2 H B lit wa MiaBU thegenuinenersr f the testimonial letters ||T ly w Him III we arc con*,ant'y publishing, we have 1 1113 I D | deposited with the National City ttpnk, of Lynn, Mass., $5,000, n B B ffj S? *5 W S3 wkich W*H |,c Pa*d to any person who will show that the above U^f IwjJBp j testimonial is rot genuine, or was published before obtaining the wr HUP writer's special permission.—Lydia 1$. 1'insbam Medicinb Co. l—m—e> II IIW ■MJJUlUaMHMMgMMMPMMMMBMBBMMBMMWMWAWMMi When it conies to word painting the sign painter is at the top of the lad der. Every time a man’s wife looks happy he flatters himself that he is the cause of it No man ever expects h!s wife to make as may mistakes as be does. 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