WILL MAUPIN'S WEEKLY
THE WAGEWORKER
WILL M. MAUPIN, Editor
Published Weekly at Lincoln, Nebraska, by The
Wag eworker Published Company.
"Entered as second-class matter February 3, 191 1, at the post
office at Lincoln, Nebraska, under the Act of March 3, 1879."
POLITICAL ANNOUNCEMENTS.
For Exciseman.
I hereby announce myself as a candidate
for the nomination for member of the ex
cise board, subject to the decision of the
republican primaries. FRED KIND.
For Water Commissioner.
I hereby announce myself as a candidate
for the nomination for water and light com
missioner, subject to the decision of the re
publican primaries. O. M. RUDY.
For Water Commissioner
I hereby announce myself as a candidate
for the nomination for the office of water
commissioner, subject to the republican
primaries. If nominated and elected I
pledge a square deal to all, without fear or
favor P. B. S PRAGUE.
For City Attorney.
I hereby announce my candidacy for the
nomination for the office of city attorney,
subject to the republican primaries.
FRED C. FOSTER
For City Engineer.
I hereby announce myself as a candidate
for re-nomination to the office of city engi
neer, subject to the republican primaries.
ADNA DOBSON.
L. C Pace.
Is a candidate for councilman at the pri
maries in the Sixth ward.
SHORT ARM JOLTS
As usual sentiment seems to be divided
on the harem skirt.
.The Washington legislature has adjourn
ed. How did they do it?
Naturally this telephone merger propo
sition is creating a lot of talk.
Without the recall we object to extending
the terms of office of any public official.
Did anybody expect Japan to admit that
she was trying to mooch a coaling staion
on us?
It seems that Mr. Cochrane is also one
upon whom the office persists in thrusting
itself.
Richmond Pierson Hobson is now repeat
ing his "I told you so," without any evi
dences of stuttering.
In the matter of election frauds Omaha
is adjudged not guilty, but warned that if
ever she does it again she'll be spanked with
force and expedition.
You know Nebraska is the best state in
the union. Now let's all make it our busi
ness to tell that great truth to all the world.
There's a room and a weleome in Nebraska
for about a million industrious home build
ers. Let's go after them right away!
If all we hear of Omaha is true, why all
that trouble about settling her waterworks
question?
We greatly fear that Representative
Randall of Texas is in contempt of one
Joseph W. Bailey.
Nebraska wheat is looking fine, and wc
are not worrying a bit over the appearance
of any war clouds.
Nebraska is the best agricultural state in
the union. The trouble is that Nebraska
isn't telling anybody about it.
The proposition to tatto married women
goes only half way. What's the matter
with putting a brand on married men?
The men who are making Nebraska are
the men who should have the most to say
about how Nebraska should be made.
Illinois is going to prohibit the harem
skirt by law. Just as if that would stop the
women if they take a notion to wear 'em.
Some of these days, maybe, Nebraska
will elect a legislature that knows the dif
ference between economy and parsimony.
And to think that the members of the
house and senate sifting committees have,
to do all that work for a measely $5 a day !
Perhaps the expenses of the postoffice
department could be greatly reduced by
limiting the amount of red tape consumed.
The next time Bailey resigns he won't.
He was almost frightened to death beforo
he succeeded in getting the first resignation
back.
If Senator Skiles and Senator Bartos
really -want to settle it without wasting the
state's valuable time, we'll clear the base
ment of our office and let them go to it.
Somebody is overlooking a bet. We
haven't yet been informed that all of Mexi
co's troubles today are directly due to the
fact that Mexico is on a bimetallic basis.
If President Taft runs short of language,
while on those southern golf links, we know
a lot of western progressive republicans
who can supply him with an unlimited vo
cabulary. Of course France is interested in this
United States-Mexico deal. Something like
forty years ago France and Uncle Sam had
a little deal on concerning Mexico, and
France hasn't forgotten it.
It took the supreme court of ' the United
States quite a while to explain to us the
difference between the constitutionality of
the corporation tax law and the unconstitu
tionality of the income tax law.
Edgar Howard wants Uncle Sam to ac
quire Mexico so that bull fighting may be
suppressed. Uncle Sam, however, will
wait until he suppresses a tfew little things
before he takes on any more clean-up jobs.
The' white slave traffic, prize fighting, cours
ing meets, sweat shopping, and kindred
evils. ..,..-.
Politics is a funny game. A few months
ago a lot of "drys" were kicking because
"wets" went over into their primary, now
they are quite sure it is proper for them to
play the same game to their own advan
tage. . .... .
If we are to be excited to any sort of
frenzy over that Mexican situation its pro
motors will have to get busy before the
baseball season opens. After that time
we'll be too busy to fool with such little
matters.
Col Roosevelt is hovering around the
Mexican border. But if he thinks he can
rough rider his way back to Washington
he has another guess coming. There will
be no Kettle Hill stunts if ever Uncle Sam
goes after Diaz.
The sixteen million "acres of untitled Ne
braska land would be eagerly sought after
by home builders if Nebraska would only
make known the fact that she has that much
land of that description ready for use and
occupancy. Pass that publicity bill!
A liquor firm in Kentucky sends a sou
venir jug with every order for its product,
and a line on the jug says: "Try me once
and you will use me again." Correct. And
try it often enough and you will find your
self incapable of using anything else.
WILL
MAUPIN'S
WEEKLY
A JOURNAL Of
CHEERFUL COMMENT
Dollar
A
Year
Fifty-two doses of Nebraska Opti
mism a dose a week for a whole
year.
Send the Dollar to Will Maupin's
Weekly, Lincoln, Nebraska.
P. S. Send the Dollar Today.
Printing of
Every Description
Promptly Performed
THE WAGEWORKER
PRINTERY,
1705 "O"
Auto 2748 - The Good Kind
