Image provided by: University of Nebraska-Lincoln Libraries, Lincoln, NE
About The news-herald. (Plattsmouth, Neb.) 1909-1911 | View Entire Issue (May 3, 1909)
MR. JONES IN AN EMERGENCY. Except for Single Unfortunate Inci dent He Was Just the Man to .Deal with It. When Jones reached home the other niijht he foam! Mrs. Jones huddled up in a corner of the sofa weeping, ami about four Inches of water on the kitchen tloor. The .Joneses hadn't been married very Ions, ho he contented himself with a general remark concerning the nonrvsoiirccfuliicss of women und asked how It li :i I ened. "The water pipe under the fclnk bars!," Mrs. Jones told him. Jones smiled pityingly, walked de liberately to the kilt hen closet and produced a wrench. Opening the eel Jar door with a confident uir he de scended to the region below. After bumping at least seven ob stacles lie finally readied the wall and reached out for the cock which ho had noticed In a pipe which traversed tho wall He applb'd his wrench and shut U off. Patting himself on the bark for be ing able to cope, wllh an emergency, he started back upstairs. Just half way up the steps ho bumped into his mitn. Mrs. Jones was the first to speak. (, dear," she said, "what In tho WDtld did you turn ofT the naa for?" Philadelphia Times. Moving on Short Notice. I was lying on the lloor of an old , country loghouse one summer day. ; uear a Mr. open fireplace, when 1 1 heard n peculiar, frightened sipuak. I got up to see what looked like a , hii!;e mouse moving at a very rapid walk across the room. When I got closer look I saw that it was a mother mouse moving her whole family. At least, I hope there was none left be hind, for very soon a small snake, but large enough to put Into a panic tho mother of four less 1 linn half grown children, came through the empty fire place, and after the little fugitive.' The mother mouse hail two In her mouth, and fastened to either side of' her, apparently holding on with their mouths and for "dear life" were tho other two. I killed the snake, and watched the moving family disappear through a hole In tho comer. St. Nicholas. J 'JUDGMENT OF HUMAN NATURE. But Cne Ir.falllble Way by Which Test Can 3e t.'.z'i, Af.jrdina to One Wntsr. Poms people claim to make a study of human nature. 7 hey will tell you thy can pad chva ter at s'ht know fans and wii.it they Index. Let us smnt a'.l this '.o be so maybe tlry ran. Then asraln, i::ayb, t'.my can't they only think they can. i'aces don't always tell tin? who!.! story. Hchind the frown and the knittel brow may lurk a hi heart and a soul full of healing humor, lb hi:: 1 tho ca-.ij; ninth may skulk the worst old wolf of a temper you ever saw. Often you will face a faro so clos 'd up you wouldn't ask it for a cent, itching to subscribe heavily to your half-dozen benevolent schemes In your Inside pocket. Then aaln a face so blind you think you could sav "Ilriek"!brit" to K, and see - i it cough up specie, like the donkey In This Mixed-Uo World. I the fairy tale, will coir;h uo nothing If things would not run Into each I A man tells me that to study human MAGAZINE BAJIGA5NS. If Y V NOT THE SPEAKER'S PROVINCE Orator to Follow Wat Proper Person to Comply with Request of Enthusiast. lynchers of all denominations oc cupied chairs upon tho platform. They wen! giving their voices and Influence !o the overthrow of a political boss. Tho Presbyterian clergy mnn had the 'flr and most vigorously attacked the enemy. He delivered some fierce, tell ing thrusts, and the audience was with Win. The boss received somo mid jabs. "That's right, soak him!" encour aged a man with a stentorian voice who had standing room in the rear. As the clergyman warmed up to his subject the Interrupting "soak him!" came from the rear with greater pow- ct and frequency. The speaker paused. He was not Irritated, but gently threw tho audi ence Into a good n at u red hysteria by saying: 'The Intentions of the gentleman in the rear are good, but wholly Inop pcitune and III advised. If he'll kind iy reserve his comments for the next aprakcr, Hrothor Herrlck of the Hap tiat church, he'll bo accommodated, o doubt." other so, it would be a thousand times easier, anl a million times pleasantcr to get on In tho world. IM tho sheep Iness be set on one side and the goutiness on the other, and Immediate ly you know where you are. It Ib not necessary to ask that there be any In crease of the one, or any diminution of the other, but only that each shall pre-empt Its own territory, and stay thero. Milk Is good, and water is good, but don't set the mllk-pall under the pump. Pleasure softens pain, hut pain embitters pleasure; and who would not rather have his happiness concentrate Into one memorable day, that, shall gleam and glow through a lifetime, than have It spread out over a dozen comfortable common place, humdrum forenoons and afternoons, each one as like the other as two peas in a pod? (Jail Hamilton. nature in the wood you nsea to oe . a person of lit'le Infl.ieree, and to go j around with a sub ;eri:iion paper for : somo religious or charitable object I Then you find out. H'cause you have : no personal Influence the cp.use looks ! the giver (or the non-glver right j smack In the face, and th' nature of the person concerned will be as evl dent as an open-faced watch. Whether : much, little or nothing be given mat , tors little, but the spirit matters a whole lot so tho informant tells us Salt Seasoned Timber. A workman was packing salt about a pile of timber. "Seasoning timber with salt, eh? It sounds like a joke, doesn't it?" ho said. "It Is often done, though, especially In ship timber. Ships built of salt seasoned timber get a better Insurance rate. Some very! rich woods are seasoned In boiling oil. That's an ancient and costly process. I A new dodge is electrical seasoning, j With strong electric shocks the sap Is driven out of the wood and replaced j by a solution of borax and resin. The scheme Is cheap; not half as good as Bait." TOUCHES THEIR TENDED SPOT. Most Men Have Weakness for Being Photographed on Horseback, Says Observant Photographer. A young man went out with a cam era one morning not long ago and took seven snap shots of early morn ing horseback riders. He sent proof of the pictures that turned out well to the men who were photographed and every one of the men sent him an order to finish up a few of the pictures. "Of course they did." said a more experienced amateur photographer when he heard about II. "A man will always buy a picture of himself on a j horse unless he's an unusually poor T If !? lY Y Y V Y TI.e following offers contain only sc'.cctid magazines of the highest meiit. The needs and desires of every ore Will be 'o;md represented in this U.-it-Womo Literature. Reviews, Juvenile, Outdoor I iterests, Ficion, Ttchmcil, Muic, Ar, Hutior, Rel g'ouf, etc. NEWS-HERALD, G'jsmopo'.ltan or flmylGan or Smcs-VaIu t $2.50 hr $2.15 Greatest Subscription Offer Through a mot ur.usinl arranjrc.-r.tr.t with the publishers we make this remarkable olTer to subscribers FOUR PUBLICATIONS AND A DRESS PflTT&RN Total Value $4.15 for only $2.65 News-Herald Pictorial Review Success Magazine Modern Priscilla Pictorial Review Pattern One Year Semi-Weekly (Fashions), Monthly, One Year (Literary) Monthly, One Year (Fancvvvork Monthly, One Year S1.50 To b sol'etfd by the nubtcribor frum tho a ylsj iliuiTa'.et in PietoriaU ' Ri'View, at any timi wuain tu month after rcvivuu the ftrat cnJ.I T j'al Ta irl Suincription price ol toe Pour and Pattern, .50 ,15 $4.15 ALL SENT ONE YEAR FOR V y f! Y f! ti ?J Y Yi Y1 V! i 2i Yi Semi-Weekly NEWS-HERALD- AND Ainsl'e' Mfza.ir.e American l'.oy .... . . 2.T0 AinericanHonie&(Jardens4 o'l American Motherhood . . 2 5 ) American Poultrx Journa? !.UE COST $3.30 for $2.S. 2.15 Appleton's MaMZir.e Atiuntu .Monthly Automobile Black Cat Mine D'l-.k liohemiar, l:k-keeper Ho.ikman liostun Cookie? School. Itreedt-r's' Gazette Murr Mcintosh Monthly. ridir and looks bad on a horse. No i rvnturv Maeazire matter how modest a man s. yon ' Children's Maa:'.in eatcli him at the nna 1 1nn? when you Chri-tiar. Herald (N. Y.) anneal to his vanity, when he's llountry U;.e m Amenta may mounted on a good riding hcrse.' True Man Shows His Worth. Ford: Titles of honor add not to his worth who Is an honor to his title. Woke Up with a Thirst. Qiippii Klizabeth of KnplanJ puted to have drunk a quart every day with her brrakfast. Is r- of ala t t Y X f Y Y Y v t Y Y Y v t V t f X f X H ft C 6 Dili Home New. . Il"ll-e I'.eai H5SSC5 Craftsman Current Literature Designer )re!V:l!;i: at Home. F..i:io-.i'ional lt?view . . - K!ec:rical World Klfctrician & Mechanic L'.ulf (for music lovers) r arr:, Journal (2i.ar) . KieW atid Stream F'orum G:(ien Mapazine keepintf .iterature . . Niaifazme. . . . izir s Matrazine eeklv Home Needlework ll"U-f I'.eautiful Housekeeper Housewife 4 ; Human Life 3."i 4.50 'J.50 a. on 2.50 4.0' 2.5V I : ; .50 4.50 5.50 2.50 :: im 5.5; 4 50 4 50 2 2 50 4.50 4.50 2.5') :; 00 !..' 3. i ) 3.5n 2.50 2Sy 1.-5 :;.ntj 2.5i oJH 0. 51 2.25 4.0O 2.2-" 1. H5 2.0) AND VALUE Illustrated London News 7.5o Independent 3.50 International Studio ... t.50 Jmlee ... K.5i Keramic Studio 5 5 Ladies' World 2.0i Ladies' Weekly . 6.50 L'fe . . 6.5: i Lipoinci.u's Magazine 4 Little FoUs (s.'ilern) new 2 5'' McCall's Macand pattern 2.t MeClure'i ML'a::ire ::."( Metropolitan Miijrazine.. 3.0" Modern i'n-ciUa 2.00 Mother's Magazine 2. ft Motor Aire 4.5) Motor Uoat 3 5' Musician 3.') Nation 4 50 National Ho ne Journal. . 2.0 National Magazine 3.i"' National So'Tt-man . ... Z- New Idea N Y) fashions 2.m Normal L'-truc'or 2.25 North America Review.. 5.50 Ojtdoor Life 3 " Ou'injj Magazine 4.50 Outlook 4.50 Pacific Month'v .... 3 ')'.' Paris Modet and Pattern 2.'.-'i Pear-on's Matrazine . .. 3.0" I'eople's limine Journal.. 15 Philistine 2.5) Physical Culture 2.iV Pictorial Review and pat. '.'.5 Ponular Matrazine 3 o.DO Popular Science Monthly 4.5) 5.00 j Primary Education 2.75 2.00 ! Primary Plans 2.5) 3.75! Puck..". 6.50 2.10 ! Putnams-Header 4.5'i 1.75 j Recreation .5d l.So i Red Hook 3) 4.H) 2.25 1. M) 2.50 4.75 3.75 2.15 2. ; 5 2.5D 2.15 3. CO 2.15 2.50 3 50 5.30 2.15 2. GO 4.5') 3 ." 3.75 1.H5 2. 15 4.00 4.15 2. 15 2.50 1.75 2.5i 2.S5 2.15 2.15 1.75 2.50 15 COST ' ' 0.95; ' 2.S5! ' 5.75, ' 5.75' ' 5.00 ' 1.W5' ' 5.50 ' 5.S5 ' ' 3.25 ' 2 15 ' 1.90' ' 2.40 ' 2.15 ' 1.85 ' l.K.V ' 3.75 ' .'!.,() ' 2 50 ' 4.25 ' 1.75 ' 2.5' ' f2.15: ' 15 ' 2.00 ' 5.01)' ' 2 75 ' 2.5 ' 4.25' ' 2 5"), 1 $5 , ' 2.50 ' 1.75! ' 2.15 ' 2.15 ' 2.15; ' 2.70, ' 4.30 i 2.50 ' 2.15! ' ,'.(50 i ' 25i ' 2.S5 : ' 2.75 1 AND VALUE Reliable Poultry Journal 2.00 Review of Reviews ..... 4.50 Rudder 4.50 Scientific American .. . 4.50 Scien. Amer. and Sup'l't 8.50 Scriiiner's Magazine .... 4.50 Smart Set 4.00 Smith's Magazine 3.00 St. Nicholas 4.5o Strand Magazine 3.00 Suburban Life 4 50 Sunday School Times .. 2 50 Sunset Magazine 3.00 System 3.50 Table Talk 2.50 Tavlor-Trotwood Mapra.. 3.00 Technical World Maga.. 3.00 Theatre Magazine 4 50 Toilettes 3.5') Travel Magazine 3.00 Van Norden Magazine. . . 3.00 Vogue .... 5 5o Wide World Magazine. . . 2 7" Woman's Home Com 'p. . 2 75 Woman's National Dailv 2.50 World To-Day . 3.')0 World's Work 4.5o COST 1 1.85 ' 3.50 ' ' 2.85 ' 4.10- 1 7.3o ; ' 4.15 1 2.H5 ' 2.70 ' 4.30 ; ' 2.li')' ' 2.85 ' 2.30 ' ' 2.15! ' 3.30 ' ' 2.15' ' 2.50 ' 2.50 ' 3.85 ' 2 85 ' 2.50 ' 2.25 ' 5.00 , ' 2.15 . ' 2.40 ' 2.10' ' 2.50 ' 3.75 YOU !AV AD3 TO VOLT. LIST All Story Magazine Argosy Collier's Weekly Delineator Everybody's Magazine. Ladies' Home Journal. . Literary Digest Munsey's Magazine Popular Mechanics Saturday Evening Post Scrap Book Youth's Companion . . ...For $1.00 . " 1.00 ... " 5.20 ... " l.(M) ... " 1.50 ... " 15) ... " 3.00 " 1.00 " 1.00 ... " 1.50 ... " 1.00 .. " 175 rIIE NEWS-HERALD wants to secure a good live represen tative in every community in Cass county someone who can give us the news and act as our a?ent in the securing of new subscribers, and attending to renewals. To such a person we will make an exception ally good proposition, one that will well repay anyone for the time spent whether much or little, and we are in a position to use as much of your time as you can give us. If you are interested please write us and we will give you full particulars. ! ?! Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y ? V f Y Y v f f Y Y Y Y t Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y t J, t Y Y v f t NEWS-HERALD. EVERyBODV-S a DEUNEflTOR-Vxl 6 $4.00 tor S300 ALL si-bsch:pti.)N3 AHE Fon ONE FL'LL YEAR. Subscription may be nw, renewal, or extensions. Maga zines may be sent to one or to separate addre.-t.-e. Additional postage is charged on Canadian and For ei'ni subscriptions. If you do not find what you want, se.'.d us your list, ani we will quote you the lowest possible price. We will duplicate any offer made by any reputable agent, agency, or publisher. The NEWS-HERALD, Plattsmoulh, Nebraska. .A. f t T t JUST CASE OF WANDERLUST. The Characteristic Ka'ional Meal. It Is not only In Scotland that break- , fast is the rha-arleristin national Family Starting to G,t Were Properly mraI Uwm nM.onl(.e Sure They Must Land Up Some- , Travwl whire V011 niav lhp filRt moal where Eventually. ()f tf)R ();iy ,3 thp onp th.u s.trik0!, (no . ' foreisn note, luncheon and dinner In tho RinoklnK car on a snuthfrn , havn(? Rr.,(lliallv absorb(,d rosn!n,in. railroad, where they had sat up all , gn qiiatM thaf a,.p nnt pV(,n pjn. nlcht. was a family conltlng ofhiw- flnpJ o hotpa ,ut you npvpr fpp, hand, wife and ttve children They j so mm.h ()f fln Kn?llshnill M whon were ruhbliiR Bleep from their eyea Swltl(,r,nn(, K,V)g you ,, blttPr and wrangling wun earn uium whh j a man entered the car and espied I Che News-Rerald TWICE A WEEK TWICE A WEEK I them and advanced to say to me man: "Howdy. Joe I'm s'prlaed to see you." "Howdy, Tom?" "Where you all BWlne?" "Down to Harbor Tint, I reckon." "Hut I thought you-all lived up at Cherry Hill?" "We did." "What youall totln' away from there fur?" "Dun no." "What youall gwlno to Harbor Pint fur?" "Dunno. Jest thouRht we'd ro." "Oh, I see. You-all thought to Kt?" "I reckon. Yes, thottRht we'd pit. and we pulled up and started a Rlttln, and If we keep on Ions 'nuff we sure 'nnff must git Btimwhar' or othfr." "Yes, sure. Been aglttln' myRP'f and always got there some day. It's heaps better than never glttln' 'tall." ' In a Different Class. "I hear, Mike, that your wife has (rr.ne Into society. Has she become a club woman yet?" "Indade an' she has not got Into that class; she still uk.es a flat Iron, sor." In the Lion's Den. riist Martyr (to second ditto) Wall, old chap, there's one consola tionthere won't he any after dluner and houpy, and nothing more, with your coffee, or when France makes this Into one exquisite crumbling "croissant," with an inch or two from a yard long loaf, or when Denmark adds cream instead of milk to the coffee and a dangerous piece of pas try to the black bread and round white roll. Yet our Kngllsh breakfast became an Institution only In the eighteenth century, liefore that only' royalty breakfasted off meat, bread and cheese and nle. The commoner, such such as Pepys, took merely a morn ing draught of buttered nle. Married Women Must Work. As long as women workers stop work at marriage they will continue to be. as a class, low-paid, over-worked unskilled, looking only to the day and never to the future, entering Industry casually without training, retiring from It unexpectedly without warning, hard to organize Into trade unions, hard to Interest In technical Improve ments, hnrd to Inspire with financial ambition, behaving, In every respect, with the utmost good sense. Just ex actly In the manner In which any class of admittedly and consciously temporary workers should behave. It Is hard to believe that such a filia tion can be right either for women or for Industry. The women lose oppor tunities. Industry loses abilities. Everybody's. PUMP AiR INTO DEAD WHALE. Hunter's Pri;e Made Sufficiently Buoy ant to Float, Marked with Buoy and Set Adrift. Then began the work of bringing the whale to the surface and blowins It up so that It would float. Taking a hitch about, a convenient post, the rop was slat-ked and run thronqh a piinoy block at the mast head to re lieve the strain of raising the great. uouy. ine winch was set in mntio and for 15 minutes nothing was heard save, the monotonous grind as fathom after fathom of line was wound In. When fie body was brought alongside the lobes of the flukes were cut off and lifted to the deck. Then a long coll of small rubber hose, one end of which was attached to a pump and the other to a hollow, spear-polnted tube of steel with perforations along Its entire length, was brought Into play. The spear was jabbed well down Into the whale's side, the air pump started and the body slowly filind with air. When Inflated sufficiently to keep It afloat the tube was withdrawn tho Incision plugged with oakum and tho chains cast off. A buoy with a flag was then attached to the carcass and the whole set adrift to be picked up at the end of the day's hunting. Popular Magazine. Immense Capital Lost. Capital formerly Invested In build ings at Messina Is calculated at about $16,000,000, at RegRlo at 1,000,000. The greatest portion of this Is Ir revocably lost. Art. Almost any millionaire would be willing to give up a large percentage of his fortune If ha could tell the dif ference be'.wcoD a masterpiece and a daub. Y speeches. The Sketch.