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CAPITAL CITY COURIER, SATURDAY MAY 23, uSyi
i
-
Rudge Morris,
LEONARD
THE ARMY MULE AGAIN.
REFRIGERATORS,
QUICK MEAL .
GAS AND GASOLINE'
STOYES.
LflttTiAvN
rm$N
rlSBi
Hot Air Furnaces,
Water Coolers,
Water Filters,
Gold Bronze and
Brass Bird Cages,
Builder's Hardware.
Rudge & Morris
1122 N Street.
The Old Reliable
FOLSOM
Is still Headquarters for
Ice Cream
Ices, Cakes, Candies, Etc.
Our Special order depart
ment for catering to private
residence and parties is the
most popular in the city
"Frompt delivery, pure goods
and reasonable prices" is out
motto. ICE CREAM PARLOR NOW OPEN.
1307 0 St. Telephone 501
Purchase Your
I tint t'rlvntn l'rclc DM Not l.euiti to
Drlvv.
Evoryhody know I had boon recom
inundod fur it commission, and thoy
called mo "lieutenant," but all thosnino
I waa doing duty an 11 private For two
or threo days I was detailed to drlvo
mulea for tho quiit-leniuister, and that
wiw tho worst servlco I over did per
form. I kicked boiuo nt hoiiitf detailed
to drive a nix mulo team, but tho colonel
Raid I might wo tho time when I could
bavo tho government a million dollars
by twin"; able to jump on to a wheel
mulo and drlvo a wagon loaded with
ammunition or paymaster's cash out of
danger of iwing captured by tho enemy.
So I went to work and learned to
"gee-haw" 11 six mulo team of tho stub'
bonuwt leanttf in th.i world hauling
bacon, but thero was no romance in
taking caro of nix muleti that kicked ho
you had to put tho harness on them
with n pitchfork for fear of having your
bond kicked olT. If I over getii imnsion it
will lw for my loan of character ntidtem
Ier in driving those mules. 1 have been
in boiuo dangerous places, but I wiih
never in ho dangerous a place in battle
aa I was ono day driving those mules.
One of tho lead milieu got hla forward
foot over tho bridle some way, and I
went to II .v it, and tho team started and
"straddled" me.
Ah soon as I saw that I waa between
tho two lead mulea, and that tho team
had started, I know my only safety waa
in lying down and taking the chancea of
the three paint of mulea and wagon go
ing straight over me. Tho atteiipt to
get out would mix them all up, so I fell
right down in the mud, which waa about
a foot deep and like soft mortar. Aa
tho mulea passed on each side of mo
ovory last ono of thoni kicked at me,
but I pucaped everything except tho
mud, and when I got up on my feet be
hind tho wagon tho (piarternianter, who
waa ahead on horaoback, had stopped
tho team. Ho called a colored man to
drive and told mo I could go back.
I tried to sneak in tho back way and
not seo anylMxly, but when I passed tho
chaplaiu'H tent a lot of ofllcera, who had
been sampling hia sanitary stores, came
out, and ono of them recognized mo, nnd
tlioy iiiBiflted on my stopping and taking
something with them. Honestly, there
was not an inch of my clothing but was
covered with red mud. They had fun
with mo for half an hour nnd then let
me go. I liavo never to looked at a mulo
sinco without a desiro to kill it. How
Privato Peck Put Down tho Itebellion.
Illlthitf I ho Null.
A horse whloh shewed evidences of dis
tress was taken on" a ear In the Bowery,
near Itrouiuo street, yesterday, audits usual
a crowd withered and everybody knew
what was the trouble and luid a remedy
for It
"Kplroot, and ho wants a hot bran
mash I" called a bootblack.
"Hots, and you must give lilin sweet llol"
shouted a truckman.
"Colic, and he wants powdersi" exclaimed
n third.
"What's all this iiboutr" asked an apple
woman as sho pushed her way Into Mm
crowd.
"That liots wants to lie down, I guess,"
replied a man who had no particular Inter
est In thealTalr.
"And It's no wonder to me," continued
tho woman, as she backed herself out;
"such a croud as this would even tire a
holofantl"-Now York World.
A ih Ice
'01
He Ya (is, I am weallytlred of mail aim
less, fulvoloiiH life. If only some oppaw
tuiilly, now, would pwesent Itself fnw mo
to assist thosu in dlstwess I should he posi
tively chawmed.
She Why don't you Join tho King's
Daughters? Life
Unfortunate.
At the close of the forenoon session of a
I ministerial conference held here, In an
, noiiuelng the opening subject fur the after
noon session I stated that Elder II
I would present a paper on "The Devil,"
and without intending any Joke or think
ing of the Indleroiisness of tho thing, I
added, "1'leasu he prompt In attendance,
I for Hrother II has a carefully prepared
I paper and Is full of his subject." Imagine
i my chagrin when an uproar of laughter
reminded mo of the unhappy witticism I
j had blundered Into. I never could mako
I Hrother II bellovo it was unintention
al, but it was. Hoinlletlc Review.
Not Quito Oonc.
A soldier of Bates' division of tho Con
federate army, after tho command had
run two days from Nashville, had thrown
away his gun nnd accoutrements, and
alono in tho woods sat down nnd com
menced thinking tho first chanco ho
had for such a thing. Rolling up his
sleeves nnd looking at his legs nnd gen
eral physique, ho thus gave vent to his
feelings, "I nm whipped, badly whipped,
and somowhat demoralized, but no man
can say I am scattered." Moore's Col
lection. A Fair Kxvliunge.
Tho day after tho battle of Dull Run
(July sa, 1801), while burial parties wero
busy at their then unaccustomed work,
Miko Flaherty, a member of tho Second
S. C. V., wandered away from his com
rades, and while strolling through tho
woods came upon a Yank, cold and stiff,
with a now pair of shoes on his feet.
Now, Miko's shoes wero much tho worso
for wear, and tho poor fellow looked
long and wistfully at tho now brognns.
It would never do to rob tho dead, nnd
yet ho wanted tho shoes.
Finally ho sat him down, untied tho
strings with many it furtive glanco at
tho dead man's face, pulled off tho shoes
nnd tried them on. They fitted perfectly,
and Miko sat eying them regretfully.
Suddenly a brilliant idea flashed into
Miko's brain. Why not swap? It waa
done. Tho old shoes took tho place of
tho now, and wero securely tied on tho
dead man's feet, and Miko, with it long
drawn sigh, said in a half apologetic
manner, "Thorn's plinty good enough
for where you're gowin'." Volunteer.
Duly Kxpliiluml,
They had moved hi next door to each
other on Saturday. Tho two men hap
peued to meet in front Saturday evening,
and tho llrst observed:
"If you should hear a nolso liko tacking
down carpets in my houso tomorrow
please don't make any mistake. It will bo
the children trotting around tho houso."
"Certainly, sir, certainly," replied tho
other. "And if you should hear things
moving and bumping and smashing on my
sldo don't jump to tho conclusion that wo
are no respecters of tho Sabbath day. It
will Ijo mo playing with tho baby." Now
York World.
IliiSfTp5JnF
'tab '" '
Direct from the Manufacturers
AND HAVI3 MONKY.
HavliiK opened a branch store of our own
In Lincoln oi will now have nn opportunity
or doliitf so.
If desired we will sell on
to responsible parlies,
Clioot Ivl-ualc lo com. to
ESTEY & CAMP
121 Houth Tenth Kt. LINCOLN, NKII
11. M LAY, Mimiit'tr.
Km ply Honor.
During tho war a man, great in his
own eyes, was, by somo iuiluenco, ap
pointed a brigadier general. His sense
of his own importance was greatly in
creased. He could hardly speak of any
thing else but his now dignity. Meeting
a "homespun" Yankeo one day hene
coated him thus: "Well, Jim, I supposo
you know I have lieen appointed a briga
dier general'!1" "Yes," said Jim, "I heerd
so." "Well, what do folks say about it?"
"Thoy don't say nothin'," replied James;
"they just laugh.'' Exchange.
Over Tlielr (Sriitt'H.
Over their Knives rnnc euro tho buttlo's call;
Tho searching xhrapnel nnd tho crashing ball;
Tho shriek, tho shock of bnttlo mid tho ncluh
Of horse; tho crips of anguish and diimay,
Anil tho loiiil cannon's thunders that appall.
Now through tho )ear tho brown pine needles
fall.
Tho lines run riot by tho old stone wall.
Hy he!ro. by meadow streamlet, far sway,
Over I heir urn vel
Wo love onr thud where'er so held In thrall
Than they nn Oreek moro bravely did, nor
dun!.
A lovo that's deathless! Hut they look today
With no rcproAchcj on m wheu wo My,
"Corao, Jot usoluip your InxmU wo'rc broth.
cm all."
Over their uravcil
-Henry Jorjmo etocluinl.
Too Late.
Iu tho wardrobe "My hat, please."
"Hero, sir."
"That Isn't mine."
"Excuse ?nc. Hcru It Is."
"That Isn't it, either."
"This one, then. Nor What kind of n
hat was itr"
"A new ono with white silk lining."
"Whatl A now hat at 0 o'clock! I ask
your pardon, but here all the new hats al
ways go away before 8." Fllegcndo Ulat
tcr. Why lie Wan Lute.
"What makes you so Into coining to
school this morning?" asked Mr. Leonard,
a teacher in ono of tho Now York public
schools, to a tardy pupil named Horned
lirookc.
"Thoy arrested a burglar In Fifty-eighth
street, and ma sent me to tho station houso
to see If It was p.i," was tho reply. Texas
' Slftings.
i -" - "
i Succ'UK III Life,
, "My son," said tho venerable man, as ho
sent his hoy forth to do battle with tho
world, "select your calling, stick to that
ono thing alone, auri you will succeed."
' Tho boy selected tho calling of villngo
I lawyer, stuck to it faithfully, and now ho
Is known for miles around as tho lest
checker player iu I'iko county. Chicago
tnduiio.
Her Mite.
"That was a stirring appeal of Dr. Hicks
ley's this morning."
"Wasn't Itl And did you seo how It af
fected Mrs. Pottstonr"
"No."
j "She hadn't any money with her, so sho
took off her new bonnet and put that In
mo plate." Harper's liii7.ur.
An Alii to Memory.
"Haven't you foruotten something, slrf"
hinted the waiter Insolently as tho guest
was leaving the table.
"Ah, yes, thanks; I helleve I have," and
tho guest took a half dollar from under his
plate, and with a pleasant smile put it
back in his pocket. Washington Post.
DUeiiImmI.
"There," ho said, as he wrapped up Ids
gun, "I don't think any one will say that
wo are going out shooting instead of going
to church. That doesn't look much like a
gun, ehf"
"No, Indeed. It looks more like a llsh
ing rod." New York Recorder.
Until nt the (uiiik.
Bookkeeper I was compelled to absent
myself from my desk yesterday, sir, on ac
count of the grip.
The lloss Grlpr lack ot grip, you
mean. I never saw-such a loose, fiunhly,
liuilTy gamo of ball iu my life, neverl
New York Herald.
A Mugn rietnre.
Sho stands with rapt, ecstatic ulanco,
As If In an Inspirit);: trance.
A heroine of old roiiinnco
He fore the footlights on tho Mniro.
Hhe looks enraptured into spat o,
A seraph's smile usn her fare;
In all her beaut), jnutli and craro
Who etui her soiiI'h emotion initiiic
Her lips are moi Iiik, and I Klcaa
That she, ala)H mi mid, serene,
Some ono time lover's fai e lias sieu
Amid thoi'iiiwil hose e es sho meet.
Or does sho build chateaux In Kpulnr
Or limplrntlon seek in aln?
Ah tin! I ceo I'm uroin; UKuin-
31io's only counting tho ricelpts.
-A merle.
'n
LOUIS
'mv
XV. MINUET.
-Tl 1-
TO MY PUPIL, LUCIUS S. GRAHAM. .
Dy CHEVALIER DE KONTSKI.
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Telephone 176
OFFICE
1001, 0 Street.
Moving Household Goods and Pianos a Specialty
Gentlemen's Rambler
-. - . .
.
Is the Wheel of all Wheels for Light Running, Easy Spring and ia
strictly HIGHEST GRADE.
E. R. GUTHRIE,
K40 O ST.
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