ALLIANCE IIKUALD. FKIIIUAItY t.V 1017
1
3,
I
ECZVZX
The GREATEST Phonograph OFFER
Made By The Greatest Piano House
The Schmollor & Mueller Piano Co., of Omaha
Anybody can own a
Columbia Grafonola
the world oldest and best phonograph
and start the New Year with music in
the home if( 'icy will take advantage of
our unprcv nted rfl'.r of no money
down 30 , ; free f ri: 1 2 to 3 years to
pay. Wn. : o: ft.r our spvehl in
ducement to irst i . ?rs and sets what a
wonderful proposu't .. have in store
for you.
Lloyd's Column
:muutumuntuxxxtxmtmnunsnu
THIS r:C CABtNKT C.RA .VML A m.J l-Uilccuons (9 doi.'.de
records) of your own choice, in Onk, N"ahf.'.:ny or Wul"iit, piano finuh,
iZ iacbn high, 19 J inches square with torn, . m : incut (or records,
only $30.55
Pil! ut Ihia Coupon lor Catalog unit pull Information.
Schmoller & Mueller Pir.no Co.,
1311-13 Furnain St., Omaha Neb.
Please son J nic catalog ot'J full p-irtieidiir how to try a Columbia Orufonola
free in my home, bIho information nbout your unexcelled payment oiler.
Name.
AddrrR-- ..................... .
133
3
Xs.
More than a million Fords arc now in every day use,
everywhere. Here are some Yeasons for this reniark
ahlu record quality service reliability low
price economy of operation ami maintenance ami
the character ami responsibility of the, Company
the Ford is certainly the only Uuniversal Car. KuiT
about $:ihri; Tourinj? Car ..'Ui(t; f. o. b. Detroit. On
sale at
FORD GARAGE
Keelcr-Coursey Company
GAS, OIL, STORAGE
This Mark Twain story might,
have happened. It dates bark to the
period when Mark was living in Hart
ford, on the next block from Harriett
Berrher Stowe and her huebnnd, Pro
fessor Stowe. - One cold and blust
ery winter morning, after on unusu
ally heavy snowstorm, a neighbor,
meeting Mark on the street, slowly
plowing his way thru the drifts, with
a corncob pipe in his mouth and a
snowshovel over his shoulder, asked
him where he was bound. "Oh, Just
around the block an errand of mer
ry," drawled Mark, removing the
pipe from between his teeth and
pointing over his should"r with the
stem of it. "Mrs. Stowe has just tel
ephoned mo that Professor Stowe is
under the weather this niprning, and
I'm on my way round there to shovel
him out."
The conductor of the IjoimIoii mo
tor bus now and ana in seizes a ureal
occension. It was a dark night, and
a lady, laden with many parcels,
boarded the bus. She was carrying
an electric torch, and, not bcnlg used
to the Instrument, found difficulty in
extinguishing it. Again and again
she tried, meanwhile sending dazzl
ing flashes in nil directions, now on
to some fellow travelers and anon
thru the windows or the open floor.
At last the conductor could stand it
no longer. "For 'ravens sike, muni"
an exclaimed, "put it nwy, or we'll
be arrested. Copper'lll tike us for
a 'Un tank."
Hast us Johnson becjime converted
a ramp-meeting. A few weeks later
he met one of the exhorters and said:
"Yo' doan' want me to 'sociate wid
wicked men no mo', does yo'. Mistah
Meekly. "No indeed." "Well, s'poie
if one nigger kick anudder on de
shins, whali it hurts he wurs', ain't
it wicked fo' him to kick hack?"
"Certainly, certainly." was the puz
zled reply. "Den ah ain't gwine
'sociate wl 1 dat Sam Ilrown no mo'
He's too wicked. Ah los' ma tempah
dis iiiawnin' try-in" to 'duce him to
jine de church. In mail escitcincnt
ah kicked dat niggah on de shins, an'
he up an" kicked me back ag'in.
I 111 Jf -rCST l a f
rtlltllllllIllIllHIHIlinilIttlHllUtUUKKttttfttttttt
was chnrfeded for a year to ip-ri'e
between the Atlantic nrd South Pa
cifir hi $lnr..nno a month.
l-'lUllg Pn-tli) tioiift
In Friar Haeo.t predicted lli.it
llyims would 'shortly' become n p'n
ral practice, and Hi'-hop Wilkin in
16.12 said. ' It will ji l be as u-u.il lo
hear a m.i n en II for his wings v 'n h he
is going on a Joiirm as it is imn to
hear him call for his boots."
Ilh.tiiifs Without I ten son
There w:is a you.ig lady named Miry,
Whose moods with ach hour wonid
vary.
When asked why so cross,
She said with a to.ia:
"Men notice a girl that's contrary."'
"Deaf dumb bline," read Mr.
Saucers. "Here my good man, lake
this quarter."
Begun r: "You lie! Dat's n nicklo
you tier."
"Darling," she said, weeping
"when we were married five years
ago, I never expected to see you com
ing homo at 1 o'clock in the morn
ing." "Well, you wouldn't now, m dear,"
he replied, "if you'd only go to sleep
earlier."
PcIMh of Philosophy
Not all bald men are deen think
ers, i
To slop over with praise Is to prova '
yourself insincere. I
One mark of being n good citizen
is sharing your auto with the neigh-!
bors. i
Thot-e high-f opned shoes for woni-j
en cover u multitude of sins as well
as shins.
An careful gossip won't harm any
body as Innn a you don't spill it out
of your incut h.
Do somebody kindness every day.
Your singing heart will pay the bill.
Everybody will be interested in
yuo, if you are interested in every
body. Bigness of body doesn't necessar
ily mean biirness of character.
Men don't be afraid of vampires.
They're harmless unless you are will
ing 'o he lured. '
Clean thoughts make clean lives.
If you want to be called a crank
disagree with everybody.
L. W. BOWMAN
Physician and Surgeon
OFFICE: First National Hank Bldg.
PHONES: Office, 362; Residence, lb
DR. D. E. TYLER
Dentist
PHONE 362
OVF.lt FIKST NATIONAL HANK
ALLIANCE : : NEBRASKA
PUBLIC STENOGRAPHER
At The Herald Oflice
111 ASONAHU: KATES PltoMPT
SERVICE
V.'ill outlast several steel tanks o
several tanks made from other it
'erlal, aud cost less money. Tbea
tanks will keep the water cooler It
summer and warmer In winter Senr
for pi ice list tooay.
ATLAS TANK MFO. COMPANY.
Fred ISolsen, Manager,
1102 V. O. W. Illdjr.. (hnah. Nh
L. A. II E R It T
liAWYEIt
Phone 9
Alliance,
Itoom 0
Kunier Illock
Nebrask
JAMES M. KENNEDY
DENTIST
Nitrous Oxide Administered
PHONES: Office, 23; Res., Black II
FIRST NATIONAL BANK BLDQ.
ALLIANCE : : NEBRASKA
J. JEFFREY, D. C. Ph. C.
A. O, JEFFREY. D. C.
CHIROPRACTORS
OFFICE HOURS, 10 A. M. to I P. M
NEW WILSON ULOCK
Geo. J. Hand.n. D.
A 8 T II A M A and
HAY FEVEK
Eye, Ear, Nose and Throat
PHONE 251
Calls answered from office day
night.
04
Duncan Mcljierson was sent to an
outpost to observe any move of the
i neiiiv. With rille and a few bonMis
he took his lonely stand. Suddenly
he observed in the darkness the ap
proach of an enemy scouting parly,
lie opened tire. The enemy charged.
Emptying hi rille, he Hung a few
bombs and the while maintained a
frightful yelling defiance, threats,
commands. Believing themselves
facing a substantial entrenched force
the attackers retreated, leaving ele
ven dead on the field. Macpherson
v:ne oil with a slight (lcsli wound,
and was awarded a medal for brav
ely. The comma tiding otlicer wound
up his brief address with: "And a
ood day's work it was sir. in',
said the gallant ami simple soldier,
quite foruetting that he was on par
ade, and perhaps a little piqued at
hi.- performance being spoken of as a
day's work: "tut, it (liln'a tak' ne
twenty meenutes. ian l' ranciM-o
Argonaut.
to have space on which to sack'the
straw. Y.i ate awfully busy out here
and hve to conserve our energy.
One of our neighbors had crossed
lightning buns with bees and now he
has homy in the i.-.aking iwenly-four
houis in the day. We get so much
butter fat at t lie collecting that we've)
found it necessary to cross the milk
weed and strawberry vine in order
to nave strawberries and cream on ;
our table. I was shelling old corn i
ist week and the engine broke down.
was in a hurry to get the job done
and while the man was out putting
, . , , .j t, a new wafer gauge on the 1 1 action
Try Grandmother's Old Favorite j j:irke(, the rear truck of my au
Recipe 01 Sage Tea and tomobile, threw the belt over one
Sulphur. v w heel and shelled 1.700 bushels of
corn. Wife swings the baby in a
THOMAS LYNCH
Au'r-t-l.aw
1519-1621 City National Bank
Building
OMAHA
Special Attention to Life Stock
Claims
I ..... - .. - i . fcM1
GRAY HAIR BECOMES
DARK AND BEAUTIFUL F
tin ,i ! si i.fi u:.. i J . "why so HrtcsvA B
ll rtf7.l 'i:i::wmiv.v MY N j V : V l . ,7 111
JMI KflSfalllMtttft
w. "I
:i lilt.'.,
iif e:-.
l wei:.
ew
l.il.e to ";l.i
i I ce .i !.
b- on one side,
in on t lie i,, her.
tried
How it looks
rhen illustrated
"(Mi my, he's
all dolled up."
Let the Baker Do the Work
Do the work, do the work
The work that you should shirk
You should shirk, you should shirk.
YOU WILL BE THE GAINER
Try Our Bread
'Twill then be plainer
Let The Baker Do the Work
Which You Should Shirk
F. F.
PHONE 649
S T E P h E N S
BAKERY
207 BOX BUTTE AVE.
'i. i :i lill.'.e II ce .l !.' la!
Wit:
An. I
I 1 1 1 coin lor which we ve
To in.ik" n newsy paper
lor I lie pi i pie of the land
And wed like that half and dollar
(tut lome folks have got it canned.
There s a llow nunc the corner
And 'one ethers out the way.
Who ate ulways tellin" ve'uns
That they're sure goin' to pay
When they sell their wheat or titters
But it surely beats the band.
They entirely ferglt us
"Til they git tlfir money canned.
Almost everyone knows flint Snpo Tea
nn.l Sulphur, proixrij- compounded.
i)rin;s hiu-k the natural color and lustre
to the hiiir when faded, streaked or
rrav. Years ago the only way to got this
mixture wax to make it at homo, which
i mu?sv and troublesome.
Nowadays we simply ask ns any drug
tore for " vet lis ai.' nn.l Sulphur
(.'eiin.oanil." You will get a hi ro bottle
of tlii.H old time recipe improved bv the
iiil.lil'uni of other iliJleiluiit for about
p() cents. ICvcrj be.lv uses this prepara
tion iiiav, l.eeau Co one can po.-sih.y tell
that you il irketie.l ;iqr hair, as it dm;
it no "iiiitur.. .ly and -. Lilly, Vi a .bmpuii
a spongo or oit. hru-'i with it mi-! draw
this through jour !"'ir, lukiutr ' f-'i- ib
stiand at i. time: ev inerui w' t ray
hair disapf'carA, and after another a;.j'!!
cation or two, vour hair lu-comcs beauti
fully dark, thick and glossy and oii
look years votmger. w veins uge ami
Sulphur Compound ia a di-lightlul toilet
xiiiiiaite. It la not inU'iiUed tor ttie cure.
uiiligation or prevention of disease, t
hammock swung between a couple
of young trees In the back yard. We
have to equip the hammock with a
rope and n 'tackle because the trees
and tie-' baby grow so fast. If we
didn't we wouldn't reach high enough
to touch the hammock and - if we
could the baby would be too heavy
to handle with ease. Last week I
was raking down a radish bed in the
gard n with u reke that hail four.bro
kenleeth. Wife called me to the
house for something and I stuck the
handle of the rake in the ground be
fore I went to the house. When 1
got hack an hour later the rake had'
crown four new teeth and I bad to
trim the limbs off the handle before
I could use it. Tills is the greatest
country you ever saw and the sooner
you pull yourself loose fro;:i those
stony fields of yours and get out here
the better off you will bo.
Professional Photographer
Quail))- Portraits
Interior and Exterior Views
Kodak Finishing
Enlaiging all Styles
M.t E. ;iti:ilE, Proprietor
ALLIANCE AUT STUDIO
Phone Red 165
WHEN INOMAHA VISIT THE
SJPrVf Zji tf "Omaha's Fun
XSAJL4tf,il$ Centre"
Brand Nw Show SSupiH t Pltoi refttlC
EVERY WEEK fai'Skal b'JBl.ESQUE
dun, Ciiifj S.-i'ii-tstif fM. FTo'y f. it. Ask Anrbettl
Luas' t:.v.t tv-i.Uc cv.r
DON'T GO HOME SAYING:
1 DIDN'T VISIT Tr!E GAYETY
illustrators- C1
WAS THERE AS AN
ADVANCE AGENT
DYE & OWENS
Transfer Line
Or else the market busted.
And they didn't sell the stuff
nr when t hev saw the boodle
They thought there weren't enough
To satisfy their longings
rash and eewgaws grand
And we didn't get the half and dollar
Or perhaps they have u cannea
So the editor still subsists
On the cheapest grub on sale
And hopes and prays for money
And watches every mail
Thinkin" some day, somewhere.
Will open up his hand
And send us that half and dollar
Before he gets it canned.
1
Promises are nice to get
And we have a pood supply
And we're still a livln" on "em.
But no matter how we try
The promise soup is purty thin
And don't fill our belly-band
So kindly come across once more
Before you get your dollar canned.
v,.i.f "Hero i3 the bill of fare
01,1 Times! "No. thank ye. 1 don't
keer to read until I've had somethin'
to eat."
Clara (exhibiting photograph)
How do you like it?""
lli'iie: "It is perfectly lovely.
" no think it is a good likeness?
"O no. it doesn't look a particle
lit, von vnu know: but I would not
mind that. Clara; you are not likely
to have such luck again if you sat a
thousand times."
"Excuse me," he said as he bit off
the end of a cigar and held out his
hand to secure a liglit irom me u.un
who was smoking.
"Beg pardon."
"I said excuse me."
WIV, oortalnlv AlWaVS Wililllg tO
Central Nebraska Fanner Spreads it
011 Thick in Writing to New
England Friend
QUIT rffl IF YOUR
KIDNEYS AST BADLY
Take Ublespoonfol of Salts if Bock
burta or Bladder bothers Drink
lota of water.
" II. A. C0PSEY
Physician ami Surgeon
Office Phone, 3C0 Res. Phone, 341
Calls answered promptly day antf
night from office. Offices: Alliance
National Bank Building, over the
Post Office.
toft
1
HOUSEHOLD GOODS
mored promptly, and
Transfer Work solicit
ed.
Dray Phona 4
Residence phona 636 and Blia 17 4
The Beaver City Times-Tribune
tells of a central Nebraska farmer
who still clings to the rock ribbed
hills of New England and told him
of the wonderful fertility of Nebras
ka. He said, among other things:
We have a dirt floor in the barn.
and we have to mow it every morning
to find the horses so we can curry
them. Talk about Jack and his won
derful beanstalk I hung my hat on
a cornstalk a few minutes while I
rested in the shade, and when I woke
up I had to go to the house and get
an ax to cut the stalk down. It had
grown so fast that I couldn't reach my
hat.
When the stalk fell it made such a
dent in the ground I had to bridge it
over to get to the other side of the
held. A neighbor family had twins
babies and had provided only one
small cradle. The babies had to take
turn about sleeping on the floor, and
care umst be exercised in keeping up
the rotation regularly. If one baby
should sleep on the floor close to the
soil more than the other one it would
grow twice as fat. When we stand
still we must take care to keep both
feeet on the ground. If we didn't
the on on the ground would grow so
much faster it would bother us in
walking. One railroad was enabled
to declare extra dividends last year on
the saving made in railroad spikes.
It sowed shingle nails along the right
of way in the fall and they grew Into
spikes in time for the spring track
repairing. I'd give anything if we
c ill (1 grow pumpkins on our farm but
we can't. The vines grow so fast they
wear the pumpkins out dragging
them over the ground. Early in June
I cut ninety tons of alfalfa from my
We are a nation of meat eaters and
our blood is filled with urie acid, says a
well-known authority, who warns us to
be constantly on guard against kidney
trouble.
The kidneys do their utmost to free
the blood of this irritating acid, but
become weak from the overwork; thoy
pot sluggish; the eliminative tissues do
nnd thus the waste is retained in tha
blood to poison the entire system.
When your kidneys ache and fro! li!;e
lumps of lead, and you have stinging
eiiins in the back or the urine is cloudy,
full of sediment, or the bladder is irri
table, obliging you to seek relief during
the night; when you have severe head
aches, nervous and dizzy spells, sleepless
ncss, acid stomach or rheumatism in bad
weather, pet from your pharmacist about
four Minces of Jad Salts; take a
tablcrpoonful in a glass of water before
breakfast each morning and in a few
days your kidneys will act fine. This
famous salts is made from the acid of
grapes and lemon juice, combined with
lithia, and has been used for generations
to flush and stimulate clogged kidneys,
to neutralize the acids in urine so it is
no longer a source of irritation, thus
ending urinary and bladder disorders.
Jad Salts is inexpensive and cannot
injure; makes a delightful effervescent
lithia-water drink, and nobody can maka
a mistake by taking a little occasionally
to keep the kidneys clean and active.
Famous
Collins
C.JJI.
jauuie zit
Moat an rid la "J
made. Have
stood the test
for 60 years.
Write for free
catalogue.
Alfred Cornish & Comp'y
Successors to Collins & Morrison.
1210 Farnani St., Omaha, Neb.
MBS. S1NCI.AIB AKUAN(ii:.S
WOMAN SI FFKAtiE SCHOOL
And he took the fresh cigar lighted twenty acre patch and then turned
it. threw his old stump awey, mm
he began on the new one he walked
off with the rerfirk: 'Very good cigar
sir very good. Of course I'll excuse
you."
The Worth of a Steamer
in a drove of hogs. When 1 got
ready to market the hogs I had to get
the neighbors to help me find them
the alfalfa had grown so fast it hid
the hogs completely. They'd gained
150 pounds each without an ear of
corn and I got $7.60 for them in
An American steamer, purchased South Omaha, tut my wneai iasi
by a San Francisco firm come two week. Had sixty acres and the yield
years ago for $300,000, has Just been ' was so heavy I had to rent twelve
sold for $1,500,000. Recently she acres extra from a neighbor in order
.Mrs. r.lsie .Sinclair, Denver, is in
Lincoln making preliminary arrange
merit a for the school to be conducted
for the suffrage workers of Ncbras
ka next month.
A school for workers of the South
Platte district will be conducted in
Lincoln during the first week in
March and for the workers of the
North Platte district in Omaha dur
ing the second week in March.
rr
Kit 1
C. E. SLAGLE, M. D.
Physician aud Surgeon
Office phone, 65 Res. phone, 51
ALLIANCE NEBRASKA
BURTON & REDDISH
Attorneys-at-Law
Land Attorneys
OFFICE, First National Bank Bldg
PHONE 180
ALLIANCE : : NEBRASKA
"LET ME CKY FOB YOU"
HARRY P. COURSEY
Live Stock and General Sales
Specialist and Auctioneer
FA KM SALES A SPECIALTY
Terms Reasonable
PHONE 664
ALLIANCE : : NEBRASKA
Our modern, sanitary cleaning
and pressing costs no more that
the other kind. Keep-U-Neai
Cleaners, 205 Box Butte Avenue
Phone 133.
GEO. G. GADSBY
Licensed Embalmer
PHONE: Day. 498; Night. 610
ALLIANCE NEBRASKA
J. D. EMERICK
Bonded Abstracter
I hare the only set of abstract
books In Box Butte County
OFFICE: Rm. 7. Opera House Block
