10
THE COTKIEll
ENGLAND'S CRACK GOLFER COMING
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Ainrl(t.n golf enthusiasts, and their number is legion, hail with tie
light tlie news that Harry Vsinlon, England's famous golf champion, is
coming to America in the early spring to engage in some hig contests.
The famous Itritish golfsman will play on many American links.
V
father Odd
to
Relate
Consternation rules among the old
ladies of England because an arch
bishop, the archbishop of Canterbury,
who signs himself F. Centuar, has said
that lighting among boys is not a sin.
He delivered this opinion in a public
address and it was reported so in the
papers but the ladies doubted the ac
curacy of the story until he confirmed
it himself. He said it was true, but
qualified himself by adding that malice
should be eliminated from the bouts.
The venerable archbishop was at one
time head master of the famous Kugby
school for boys. He has just celebrat
ed his eightieth birthday. He draws
a salary half as large as that of the
president of the United States and
takes precedence of all the peerage
except royalty.
Here Is the person who would not
like to neet a stranger at a train with
an offering of $10,000. The other day
President Dickey, of Albion college,
Mich., received a letter from a man
who told him that if he would meet
him at a certain train at a certain time
he would have something desirable to
show him. The president was there
and the man handed him an envelope
requesting that It be not opened until
he had returned to his otlice. The
president heeded and found on break
ing the seal, $10,000 as a gift to the
school. No name was inscribed there
in and the giver Is unknown.
The way to kill a cinder beetle is
to wet him and let him rust to death.
For the salvation of western Kansas
from the depredations of this pest
Prof. Clinker of the agricultural college
of Kansas at Manhattan has recom
mended this manner of treatment and
his commentators predict the sudden
reclamation of the infested end of
Kansas. Once thoroughly wetted the
beetle will corrode to death in three
days, says the professor. This insect
has the usual set of four wings. His
mail plate, or the outer wings will
rust if well moistened and the poor
thing has lost its flight forever. The
process of corrosion next attacks his
six legs and the unfortunate bug finds
himself unable to reach Its meals.
Thus does he land In an early grave.
There exists in St. Louis a strangely
enterprising man. Having no time to
read at home or at his labor he carries
a little lamp with him onto the street
cars and clamping it to a pilaster in
the car. at his shoulder, he makes rich,
with books and paper, the fleeting mo
ments, to and from his work.
.
Kansas is not the only state with a
saloon destroyer. A Nemesis Is at
work in New Jersey a woman who
depends more upon strategy and di
plomacy for her victories than does
the renowned Carrie. She does not
sport a hatchet. Miss Jean Geddes is
her name. She lives in Newark and
has vowed extermination upon all the
saloons in that state who keep open
on Sundays. Out of sixteen whose ar
raignment she has secured so far all
but one waived examination. Boldly
and briskly she saunters into a saloon
and orders a beverage as glib as the
glibbest. Does she drink? No. She
uses the grog. If it is served to her.
as evidence. After taking the names
of those likely to be good witnesses
she immediately casts the net over
the saloonkeeper, and there he is. Side
doors are most frequently used on
Sundays, she finds, but she does not
shrink from them in the least. One
time she was in London working witli
William Huckle for the apprehension
of opium smugglers and two evil men
suddenly caught her and hastened off
to the dock to see to her instant
drowning. Fortunately Mr. Huckle
was not far off and he arrived in time
to get the drop on the villians and the
woman was saved. Fiequently Miss
Geddes carries her point with the aid
of an accordeon. She plays it in front
of a saloon, attracting a large crowd,
which takes her for a wandering min
strel. When she has drawn quite a
multitude she walks into the saloon
and orders a bottle. labeling it with
the exact time she goes forthwith for
an officer and an arrest soon follows.
What do you think of rich, red wine
for a fire quencher? Did any say that
is the best possible use for it? Ten
thousand gallons of the costly liquid
were recently poured upon a raging
forest Jire in the Santa Clara valley of
California and after several hours of
active work the liquor prevailed. A
farmer in the west, or coast district of
the valley, set fire to a brush pile and
it got away from him. Away over the
hills and valleys it went eating up
monster pines, redwoods and mad
ronas. lly and by it came to the Mare
Vista winery, run by Ernest Meyer.
Valiant men plied the water until a
falling tree ruined their connection.
Then with fire beginning to catch on
tlie blistering buildings word was given
for the men to man the pumps. Vat
after vat of claret, port, sherry and
fine white wines were sucked up
through the pumps and merrily forced
in gushing streams onto the names
that tossed about in the trees sur
rounding the winery. Men with
buckets poured claret onto the walls
of the buildings. Once during the fire
a chemical vat was dangerously ex
posed. One of the men was held by
his legs from a window while he di
rected a stream of liquor against a
stubborn blaze. Meanwhile to keep
his clothes from igniting another
stream of red liquor was aimed at
him. In testimony of the good quality
of the fluid it may be said that the
fire was vanquished after 10,000 gallons
had been thus consumed ami a day of
stout lighting had been recorded to the
credit of the men. The number of
tieep toned sighs they emitted during
the day has not been chronicled.
Li Hung Chang one time found him
self possessed of two wives. It is said
to have been the most criticat period
of his life. Wife No. 1 he had sent to
her parents in the interior during the
Taiping rebellion that she might es
cape massacre. After a long time he
thought she surely had been killed and
a public funeral was held In which her
empty coflin was paraded. After a
time lie took to himself another wife
and while he was enjoying domestic
felicity wife No. 1 reappeared. This was
quite embarrassing. Li advised with
the emperor, who, on the ground that
the funeral of the first wife had been
held she was nominally dead and
should be ignored. Li took up with
the suggestion and No. 1 returned to
her parents, there to die in the course
of a number of years.
ir "r --
Progress.
"How the science of government has
improved in the last twenty-live
years!"
"Hasn't it! Tweed went to jail, and
Croker goes to his country home in
England."
".- V
Housemaid Somebody has stolen the
landlady's diamond ring, and suspicion
has fallen on that young fellow who
rooms on the first lloor.
Fifth Floor Lodger Thank heaven, I
am above suspicion'
Wonderfully Made.
Why don't you use that Christmas
present your girl made you?
I'm afraid to, I don't know whether
she intended it as a tobacco pouch or a
neck-tie.
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