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OMAHA LETTER.
Omaha, Nebr.,
July 27, IDOL
Dear Eleanor:
Still day melts into day, like golden
beads strung on threads of fire!
I have paused fully fifteen minutes to
admire that figure of speech. It would
take a prejudiced critic indeed who
would refuse to acknowledge the superi
ority of the person who could accom
plish it, especially when she did so
under the realistic impression that the
perspiration was surely ruining her last
clean shirt waist, and that she hadn't
another darned pair of socks in her
bureau drawer and not the slightest
inclination to darn one from the very
formidable bunch cruelly located where
she cannot help but see it.
Mother's "Pouf" is simply untrans
latable whenever 1 murmur anything
about the responsibility of genius. To
a great extent, Eleanor, you are to blame
for my undeniable sbiftlessness.
How is it within the compass of one
weak feminine personality to put aside,
to turn away in short, to rise above the
subtle flattery rolled up in your persua
sive demands for my letters -your ap
parently uncontrollable joy at their ap
pearance, your lachrymose reproach
when they fail? It is the most insidious
injection that ever spread like wine
through a pulpy anatomy. It stiffens
my collapsing vertebrae, it hardens my
limpid digitals. It lifts me bodily from
a supine position among silkoline cush
ions to an uncurled attitude before my
desk, frantically reaching for my indeli
ble pencil, scraps of paper, backs of
envelopes, anything. In fact, I tind
suddenly that 1 have been provided
with a fictitious energy projected an
incredible distance along the road nec
essary to provide you another shower of
joy in the way of a letter. 1 am fully
equipped in the matter of everything
save ideas. You have fired your explo
sives, mo&t wonderful Lincoln scientist.
You have gathered the clouds. Fitful
lightning flashes along my mental hori
zon; there is a pregnant rumbling in the
distance, but alas! where are the showers
your well-meant fireworks should pre
cipitate? Precipitation! If there has
been anything which has added more to
my mental and physical discomfort in
the last thirty-six ilas, than the weath
er, it has been the precipitation which
does not precipitate. I made no prom
ise not to talk about the woatbtr or not
to write about it. All the printing
houses in the town have used up their
"slug beads" on the subject, and still
there is more to follow! What am I
that I should hold myself above the
rest of my kind? There is an immense
number of people in this world whoso
mission, like that of excolsior. is to "fill
up epace." Not an ignoble part, by the
way, if by bo doing we save some of the
finer, more fragile pieces of the potter's
wheel from being shattered. There may
be bargains in excelsior, just as there
are in dimities, but the public is not
discriminating, and you are liable to
have your feelings hurt if you ravel out
the best of your mental tissue for stuf
fing. You may have paid 25c per, for
jour lawn gown, only tohave Mrs. Jones
flutter out upon her front porch in a
eown of identically the same stutr for
which she gave up only five cents per at
the B. S. Monday morning. Whose
fault is it if you have to Bee to the wash
ing Monday morning and Mrs. Jones
has a "hired girl?" You have put the
difference into your lawn gowns, while
you have been keeping some worthy
girl from a good home.
The Governor and thb Mayor, the
Tax Taker and the Census Maker and
their many satellites in the political
plum garden have been making merry
in the fields and beneath the fruitful
vines and trees. They feasted, and for
got. Forgot that upon high Olympua
Jove was withholding his thunderbolts,
garnering the rain and setting the sun,
day after day, in unveiled, awful splen
dor above the picnic ground of the royal
merry-makers, Pan piped amid the
reeds and rushes, piped that they might
dance, shouting triumphantly, "After
us, the Deluge."
But lo! the deluge was long delayed;
but still they sang and danced. Then
the plums began to waste of their fat
ness, the grasses to faint along the
shtunken streams and the shrill screech
of the locust forbode a famine in the
land. Suddenly broke the cry of a fear
ful people, which even reached the Bot
tom like ears of the feasters among the
plum tree9, "There is Judas among the
mighty; be has betrayed us, else why
should the great Jove thus turn his
face away from us?"
Upon the cry of "Judas," the Tax
Taker turned upon the grieving Census
Maker, sayirg, "It is thou! Some hate
ful fault hast thou been hiding. It is
this which angers and brings a hateful
plague upon a goodly people."
"Not so,'' replied, in wrath, the Cen
sus Maker; "not so. More like, it seems
to me, to be yon gayly carping Gas Col
lector, who has meted out injustice and
brings leanness to the land. Let us go
hence and bid him turn off the gas he
wasteth in the day time."
But the Gas Collector, hearing, made
answer lightly: "Of truth nothing have
I done. Believe me, it is the Mayor
who fetcheth destruction upon us. In
secret he hath sought to fell the tree,
which, by reason of his girth, he dare
not climb. Let us fall upon and slay
him. Let us smite this dry rock that
water may fall upon the desert."
But the Mayor, who, in the scanty
shade of falling plum trees, was boring
yet another eyelet in the belt of state,
overhearing, turned upon them sadly:
"Why have you no patience that you
so wrongly do accuse me? No secret
fault of mine doth so delay the favor of
the gods! Why do the people cry against
me? I, who have ever irrigated the
waist places, have opened wide the doors
of plenty? Ilarken to me, for it is the
Governor the Ruler of the Seven Cities
of Cibola, who Bkims the heavens of
clouds and piles the dust before our
portals. He gathereth his glad rags
about him and refuseth to beseech. Let
us fall upon him. Let us lay him low."
"To the Governor! For some secret
of his, doth Jove refuse us!"
"It is enough," replied the Ruler of
the wasted land of Quivera, turning the
signet ring upon his shrunken finger.
"I have done no evil thing, that the
juices dry within the corn, but my chil
dren oppress me. I am weary. Get
you to your houses. Pull close the
blankets of your tepees; put forth rain
barrels, for I will abase myself. I wi'I
bring down 'zwei rain' from those
Olympian heights. For the people! For
the people!'" A crackling as of meeting
An accredited school to the State Universities of Nebrasku and Iowi
Prepares for tho leading Colleges and Universities.
A.II?II5r 2Vr. WILSON, F. r. (Yale), Principal.
ADVISORY BOARD:
Chnncellor E. Henjamln Andrews Kev Dr. II. O Uo lands
I'rofessorCroveK. llarber Mrs. A.J Suwjer
Professor Erwln II. Harbour Deun Lucius A. Sherman
Dean Charles K. llesser Professor W C L Talor
Adjunct Professor William F Dann Professor Henry li Want
Dean Kllerv W Davis Itcv Dr Fletcher I, 'A'harton
Professor Fred Morrow FIIiik Mrs. II. II Wilson.
Dean Manoah II Keese
Address of Principal, till' South I Ith Street Lincoln Nelir
clouds ran along the south. "Hark ye!
It thundereth."
"Not so," replied the wily Census
Maker. "His Excelloncy goeth upon
his knees!"
Then of a truth the rain barrels over
flowed, the breathless grass lifted and
the shrunken stream rose up and hast
ened to the sea.
The people laughed who late had Bor
rowed, and like he of ancient lore, who
had but to put in his thumb to pull out
a plum, His Excellency murmured,
"What a brave boy am I." The Salva
tion Army woman, with tearful eyes,
bent upon the dust wherein she kneeled,
murmured, too, and bending low, 1
heard, "God is good; God ib very, very
good." Perhaps she did not know about
His Excellency.
Two little birds are standing in the
rain which fills the gutter on the ve
randa roof. They are dipping their
beaks as far as possible in the cooling
water, then lifting their shining beads
to the fresh-washed sunlight. They
are fluttering tiny wings across the sur
face of their little stream no doubt to
them an ocean and shaking the round
raindrops about in a very ecstacy of de
light. In their swelling, thankful bird hearts
I am sure the echo rings, "God is good.
God is very, very good."
I have not read anything lately; have
not seen anybody or heard "things," and
it is Bcarcely necessary for me to dem
onstrate any more fully than I have al
ready done that I do not know anything.
If 1 were sensitive about thiB lack I
would, no doubt, stop writing letters.
Nobody is at home, and if they are, they
do not wish it spoken about. The saints
forbid that I should be ashamed of the
Blight strain of Celtic blood I inheiit
from Paw.
Mr. Thomas J. Kelly, late of the mu
sical columns of the Bee, has gone to
join his wife on the shore of Lake Mich
igan, where, I believe, they expect to
combine work with pleasure during their
vacation. What a deplorable habit the
work habit is. It leads one to take his
pleasures so seriously. Mr. Kelly has
left an "understudy" in charge of music
al Omaha during his absence.
Somebcdy will probably play thunder,
but perhaps the "understudy" will not
hear it, as he has stuffed cotton in his
ears, so that nothing will distract his
attention and make him forget the last
wordB of the master. His highest am
bition is to do everything "like 'ell he
did!"
"The bell strikes one!" It is all very
well for Duncan not to hear it, but it
behooves Penelope to pay attention, if
she does not wish the iced tea to warm
up and the 3teak to cool down.
I will write you perhaps once more
before we, the family, leave town.
As always,
Pf.nf.loit.
Our dachshund is a clever beast :
He wagged his tail from west to east
And back again, until we leased
Our flat and moved up town :
But now his compass hath no East
Nor Vest; he wags-eh, prudent beast !
He wags it up and down .
Town Topics.
csmfNio.
CHOCOLATE
BON BONS
For Sale By
J. F. Harris,
No. I, Board of Trade,
CHICAGO.
STOCKS
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MKMHEK
New York Stock Exchange
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Chicago lioarii of Tradp
FOR A SUMMER OUTING.
The Rocky Mountain regions of
Colorado reached best via tho
Union Pacific provide lavishly for the
health of the invalid and tho pleasure of
the tourist. Amid these rugged steeps
are to be found some of tho most charm
ing and restful spotB on earth. Fairy
lakes nestled amid sunny peaks, and
climate that cheers and exhilerates.
The
SUMMER EXCURSION RATES
put in effect by the Union Pacific en
able you to reach these favored locali
ties without unnecessary expenditure of
time or money.
ONE FARE FOR THE ROUND TRIP
plus S2.00 from the Missouri River, in
effect June 18th to 30th, July 10th to
August 31st, inclusive.
The Union Pacific will also sell tickets
on July 1st to 9th, inclusive, September
1st to 10th, inclusive, at 15.00 for tho
round trip from Missouri River points.
Return limit October 31, 1901.
Proportionately lo rates from inter
mediate points.
Full information cheerfully furnished
upon application.
8 31 E. B. SLOSSON, Agent.
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