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About The courier. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1894-1903 | View Entire Issue (July 13, 1895)
THE COURIER. S i. 1 I i GASABIANCA REVISED. Tho boy stood on the burning deck Whence all but lie had tied Tbo rest had skipped becauto tbojr knew The heat would kill 'em dead Tho boy wai game he would have died A noble death and true Had not some viltian shouted, "Is It hot enough for your New York World. ooooooooooo H. W. BROWN Druggist and Bookseller. Wt-altii-atE Fine Stationery and Calling Cards 127 S. Eleventh Street. PHONE 68. ooooooooooo HE APOLOGIZED Kiljordan Kajones, you are a gentle man. I told you a story yesterday which I now remember having told you a few weeks ago, and you took it the second time wincing. Kajones I beg to assure you I did not remember that you had ever told me the story before. Kiljordan Then I take back my first remark. SODA-"LICIOTJS" Is what they say of our Omritre jiioli.a'te5 Our soda is all tine. Crushed fruits served with ice cream soda. Wilson's gharmacY1 TENTH & O. A GOOD ARTICLE Writer Bow did you like my article? Editor Very good, indeed. I confess to having read the snme thing in Greek of Thucydides, however. Writer You don't say! That's where the copyright laws are all out. They allow those foreign scoundrels to steal our best things and give us neither money or praise. OOOOOO OPERH - HOUSE - BUFFET, 115 So. Twelfth St. .... Under Funke Opera House. Only the finest liquid refresh ments served. CUS BENSON - OUIS. NEWBRMDT Proprietors. OOOOO LOST A CUSTOMER. Floor Walker (to salesman at hosiery counter) You didn't sell that lady? Salesman No. I showed her some, stockings that I told her would fit her like a glove. She asked if they were all wool, and I said: "Yes all wool and a yard wide." And she flounced off as if sotaething had displeased her. For the life of me 1 can't guess what it was." I AM THE GENERAL AGENT for MUNYONS REMEDIES. Druggist, FUNKE OPERA HOUSE. WHEN A MAN'S TO BE DOUBTED. Husband "What's the matter with my darling this morning?" Wife "You know well enough what's the matter. You came home drunk last night." Husband "Me drunk last night never." Wife "But you owned up that you had been drinking." Husband "I did, eh? Well, you can't believe half what a man scys when he's full." A full set of Best Teeth $5.00 Teeth Extracted Without Pain. All work guaranteed! I. T. HRTURWRY, ....1214 O Street. AT THE SODA FOUNTAIN. "What will you have, dear?" "I don't know what I want." "I don't either." "What's yours?" "Oh. don't mind me." "Yes, I will, too." "No dear, suit yourself." "Yes, I know, but which do you want. "Oh give me chocolate." "Dear me, I don't see how you can drink chocolate; give me vanilla, please." PRESCRIPTIONS and SODA WATER The most reliable pharmacy 1029 O Street McGALk & BURGH, arour Ice cream soda is the best on earth. . . . YE LEGENDE. The devil tempted Faust, and ho Unfortunately fell; Faust tempted Marguerite, and she Ran off the line as well. But Marguerite at last became An angel bright and fair; While Faust though tempted just the same Was hustled off somewhere. And yet New Women make complaint With all tho force they can. Because the laws for women ain't The same as those for man 1 Pick-Me-Up. THE RESTAURANT AT BURLINGTON BEACH At Lincoln Salt Lake is this sea son under tho management of an experienced caterer, and your patronage will be appreciated. All kinds of meals, lunches and re freshments always on hand. 6. L. KEEL Concessionaire.! 0 BICYCIB Shoes, Pants, Sweaters MAYER BROS. A COMPROMISE. It was in an absent minded sort of way that she read the sign, "Ice Cream." "Oh, ah; ice cream" said he. "Did you ever read that there were deadly ptomaines in ice cream?" "Yes." she said, a little spitefully. "Did jou ever read of the microbes in kissing?" On reflection he concluded to com promise on a basis of present cream and future kisses. 0000000000000000000000000 ROY'S 16 ME 1014 P STREET. Removal Scale Special prices on all sun dries, incluJing Base Ball goods, Hammocks, Fishing Rods and Tackle, &c. Sta tionery, &.c, &c, for the next two weeks After July 1st, corner Tenth and P. NISSLEV'S OLD STAND. 0000000000000000000000000 OF UNDOUBTED LINEAGE Mrs. Newrich (patronizingly) Were any of yon r ancestors men of note, Mr. Cynic? Mr. C. Yes, madam, I should say so. One of them was the most famous ad miral of his day, and commanded the allied forces of the world. Mrs. N. (with altered tone of deep respect) Is it possible, Mr. C! And what was his name? "Noah, madam." P. J. WOHLENBUKG, -manufacturer of FI2VEJ CIGARS and dealer in all leading cigars, pipes, snuff and smoking tobaccos; also canes 128 South Eleventh Street. A TOW-HEAD BOY A "tow-head boy! I mark him as he plays His muddy legs and pealing nose Hint vividly to me of the summer days, And the creek that flows Cool and refreshing by, Where yesterday he spit luck on the Squirming angle and CaBt his hook to raise a goggle-eye Safely to land! MEN EXCHANGE KAIM BANK LINCOLN, NEB. I. M.RAYMOND, President. S. H. BUBNHAM. Cashier. A. J. SAWIER Vice President. D. G. WING, Assistant Cashier. CAPITAL, $25,000 SURPLUS $15,000 Directors -I. M. Raymond, S. H. Burnbam, C. G. Dawes. A. J. Sawyer, Lewis Gregory, N. Z.Snell,G. M. Lambertson, D. G. Wing, S. W. Burnham. CONSOLATION. "S' blood!' " The robber baron stamped in rage "but four paltry rose nobles in the strong box of this worthy burgher!" "Evidently" He turned with a scowl upon the hon est merchant. "Anyway "' "We may get it. For some day in years to come, some scion of mine may take a daughter of your race to wife." " Even in those rude, crude days the high banded nobility had acumen and foresight. CLARKS0N LAUNDRY CO. 330-332-334-336-338 South Eleventh Street. .Telephone 270. NO APPARENT FAILURE. Edward Isn't Dick going off in his writings? Forrest I haven't noticed it. Edward It seems to me that he has lost that exquisite delicacy of touch he used to have. Forrest (ruefully) By Jove! You wouldn't think so if you bad seen him work me for ten this morning. ooooooooooo OO OOOOO ?! CYCLE PHOTOGRAPHS O ATHLETIC PHOTOGRAPHS l PHOTOGRAPHS OF BABIES l PHOTOGRAPHS OF GROUPS : EXTERIOR VIEWS CLEMENTS The Photographer. 15fl South Eleventh Street oooooo ooooooooooo A SAVAGE DILEMMA "I dou'tknow what to do with that chappie we got out of the last ship wreck," said the chef to the cannibal king. "What's the matter?" "If we take his cigarettes away from him he'll pine away and get thin." "Let him keep them." "Then he'll spoil the flavor of the stew." W" 2.' T ' T. $3.00 Commutation tickets for 82.75. Good Meals 5 cents and up. SHAFFER'S ANNEX RESTAURANT. Parlor and furnished rooms in connection 133 South Twplfth street. Lincoln, Neb. F. SHAFFER, Proprietor. ii A DESERVING FATE. Just a song at twilight, Where the microbes grow, N Where the gay processions Of gennlets come and go ; Just a serenader, Who in whispers speaks: Just a cough that took hiti off Onsickleare for six weeks. Washington Star. j-f w JOtifettAJAw