14
THE COURIER
PASSING OF THE BRIDE.
THE SOCIETY PREAGHER.
At a recent conference of hotel proprietors the bride as a guest
came up for discussion. All those present agreed that she has
changed her haunts and habits, is a shy bird, and, though as easily
recognized as of old, is seldom captured by the big hostelries. A
well-known Niagara bonifaco was full of regrets and indignation on
tho subject. He declared that the frequent and unfeeling news
paper paragraphf directed againr her had cost him hundreds of
courles annually. If s newly married pair are determined to see tho
Falls, they simply stop off bstween trains, and never as of old phil
ander about the romantic Sister Islands or do their love-making on
tho wide verandas. Half of the charm of Niagara vanished, so ho
said, when tho shy, self-conscious bride was chaff6d out of going
there, and for prodigality with tips tho negro waiter never hopes to
see the groom's like again.
The manager of a famous New York hotel remarked that among
the weathly poople.publicity immediately after marriage is studious
ly avoided. Tho honeymoon,' which was formerly passed on trains,
ocean steamers, or at fashionable inns, is now spent in tho seclusion
of a house loaned by a friend for tho occasion, or else the wife goes
directly to her new home' The idea, ho observed, was imported
from England, where brides are as choice as cut flowers, and think
it bad form to show themselves for two weeks at least. New York,
he continued, catches a lot of southern and Western couples, whose
wedding journey ia possibly tho greatest event of their lives. But
the bridal suites that used to bo tho pride of a hotel proprietor's
heart are occupied half tho time nowadays by old bachelors or
married folks well on in thoir anniversaries.
Among the assembled company there chanced to bo ono or moro
owners of high-priced and exceedingly smart lako and mountain
houses, who smiled complacently over tho grumbling of their
brethren. One of these defended the bride from the charge of affec
tation and caprice. She very naturally objected to the smiles and in
qusitive glances that followed' her every appearance, resented those
ostentatious, satin hung bridal apartments, and simply asked to be
let alone, with opportunities to bill and coo in quiet nooks, and
glades. All four seasons the fashionable country hotel, which is a
growth of the last few years, offers the brjdo just the opportunities
she craves.
WIGKED WITS AND WOMEN.
c Here aro a few of tho things that wits have said about women
when they have found her "uncertain, coy and hard to please:"
He that hath a fair wife never wants trouble.
A woman's fame is the tomb of her happiness.
No woman is too silly not to have a genius for spite.
Love thy wife as thy soul; shake her like a plum tree, says the
Russian proverb.
Most women are better out of their houses than in them.
A women is always grateful to you for having thrown you over
board. Women distrust men too much in general and not enough in parti
cular. A woman is like your shadow; follow her she flies; fly from her she
follows.
Women are apt to see chiefly the defects of a man of talent and
the merits of,a fool.
An opinion formed by a women is inflexible; the fact is not half so
stubborn.
Twice is a women dear; when sha comes to tho house and when
she leaves it.
, The only way to get the upper hand of a woman is not to be moro
womenlhan she is herself.
The most dreadful thing against women is the character of the
men that praise them.
Women swallow at one mouthful the lie that flatters and drink
drop by drop the truth that is bitter.
A woman is seldom tenderer to a man than immediately after she
has deceived him.
Vanity acts like a women they both think they lose something
when love or praise is accorded to another.
To say "every, one is talking about him" is a eulogy; but to say
"every one is talking about her" is an elegy.
'Ten Thousand a Year," by Warren, has an excellent example of
the society preacher. The reverend gentleman in question had
carefully prepared himself, by and elaborate course of training, to
bo pastor of a fashionable congregation. He wore the most elegant
style of clerical clothing, he had a hairdresser to curl his locks pre
paratory to warning his dearly beloved brethern, as many as are here
assembled to flee from the wrath to come; he adorned his ficger
with an elegant ring, whose diamond setting was the admiration of
all tho young ladies of the congregation. Nobody was ever offended
at his preaching. He sometimes told his people of their sins, and on
several occasions assured them that if they did not repent they
would go to a place he had to much respect for his audience to name
in their presence, but no one ever took offense at that, and that was
the nearest approach to denbuciation he was ever known to make.
His opposite is presented in the young dissenting preacher in the
same work. Loud of voice and vehement in action, he never ceased
to warn his people of the constantly impending danger they incurred
by neglecting his precepts. Novel reading, was to his mind, the
surest means of losing all semblence of religion; card playing was
the most detestable of all vices; the theatre was the half-way house
to that other place. HiB idea of securing happiness in the next
world was to bo as miserable as possible in this, and he could not
impress his idea too forcibly on his congregation. His images wore
all drawn from the Scriptures; his sermon wrs interlarded from start
to finish, with Scriptural texts. He rebuked sinners as sin, and when
he spoke of tho 6hort-comings of his people he looked directly at tho
men who were guilty of tho shortcomings. He called a spade a
spade when he spoke of it, it was impossibble for any one to imagine
that he meant a hoe. He. too, was a type, and no one need to travel
to England to find others like him.
HEROISM.
"George," she said in a low voice, "would you make a great sacri
fice to my happiness?"
"Certainly," he replied.
"Would you quit smoking for my sake?"
"Quit smoking for your sake!" he repeated.
Then after a silence he exclaimed hoarsely:
nothing. I will quit smoking for your sake,
smoke it shall be exclusively for my own sake."
I can refuse you
Hereafter when I
PROFESSIONAL INSTINCT.
She was engaged in conducting a department for a magazine, and
her mind was very much with her work.
"Did you receive my letter?" he asked.
"Yes."
"The one asking you to be mine?"
"Yes."
"Then," he said, almost fiercely, "why did you not answer it?"
"Why, William," and there was surprise and reproach in her voice,
"you know you forgot send reply stamps."
AN IMPUTATION.
Cora Phay You don't mean that your going to marry again do
you?
Comic Opera Prima Donna (indignantly) Do you mean to imply
that it's time for me to abondon my artistic career and retire?
OUT OF ORDER.
Little Oirl We has a new baby.
Neighbor Yon have?
Litlle Girl Yes'm, an' its eyes open an' shut, too; but I guess
there's somefing zee matter wif its works, 'cause zeo eyes don't
always shut when you lay it down. .
Mrs. Harriet A. Marble, of Poughkeepie, N. Y., was for years a
martyr to headache, and never found anything to give her more than
temporary relief until she began to take Ayer's Pills, since which she
has been in. the enjoyment of perfect health.
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V
