.
;
THE GUMPS-
Drawn for The Bee by Sidney Smith.
come more fond of those with w hom
they are in daily contact.
You have been distant and seem
distant to them. -and when you get
their point of view you "will feci less
disappointment. v
ton' as I am that's all I care about.
I rte is 0 short to wear out my
cats listening t other people talk,
and it's too s'lort to get in all the
talking I wain to do if I give you
and other rcoHc I meet a chance to
niouopoli,: the conversation. So
you LISTEN and I'LL TALK taxi
ihoii we'll get r.long better.
Coi right, 190, ThompKon Feature Service
Says Escort Threw Her Out.
Police were informed Thursday"
that Margaret Xrifeon, 63J South
Scvenlenth avenue, was the girl who
was reported thrown from a speed
ing automobile Tuesday night at
Forty-eighth and Center streets.
Miss Ncilson told police Thursday
morning that while returning from
a ride with Harold Willard. 632
South Seventeenth avenue, he threw
her bodily from the car. She said
that she and Willard had been drink-"
i"ei-
FOOD FOR FISH
THEY OU6V4T TO VET NEBS-UKeOO
tVSU OUT OF SEASOKr OU EEO
tvei wwtx they spava -These
-SMART r"SH SWCT To EAT FTCQM TW
UHE PN-WHEN TftY OtT THROUGH, TE
HOOK4-OOKS SO LONESOME
WE.'1E 60T FASH IN HERE.-THAT
KNOW HOR.E ASOUT HOOKS THAH
THEY" POKY JUMP AT COHCUJStONS If A FCO(5 JUMPS 1H
WELL-
CWVER FISH
YAERE COMES
" THEY SWIM AROUND HIM TWO Ott. YWfcEF- TIMES BEFOPF TWfV T&wp
HIM L00KIM&TORA LIME YOU OOSHT To STAPY NAVTW TMF &ipo
I'M THE GUY
SO OUT
'"WAT M0NVTEJ2.
AND WOR.K VOUCSEVF 0T THE SIMPLE ONES ALL. HANS AMOUNT)
AHP OJE&H
.Vei
VOU CAN'T
HA.MD T0e
AHVW1N6 BUT
I'M THE GUY who, when you'r
'.tying totell Irin something, cuts'
you off in the middle of a sentence
end starts talking about something
else.
I don't know why I should keep
on listening to yu just "because
you're talking "about something
YOU happen to be interested in.
I'd rather start talking about soirre
thirig that interests ME.
I know it isn't polite, but then,
wlv't does politeness ajnount to coin
pared to my own pleasure?
You may not be interested in
what I start talking about but as
OVT THlfc
A LAUGH
THt SUV THAT MAKES EM
m
Have Root
Press. Adv.
Print It. Beacon
rnOTO.Pl.AVS.
rHOTO-PI.AVS.
J
1111
I Perch ability i ll say thvs to ou Yovj've ,
OOY.THE UtCOR-O AT WAPT EST fOd J v vTJJ
-"v --IH ErtPTY HOOKS STICK A J . lkvTfi
X 1 - TrrHHER. CELL OH TOUR. n- T J
flrWINSTOBIEjl
It't Uncle Larry Now. ,
He opens the door and walks right
ing, and he sees a plump woman
in. Through the open door comes
the smell of something good cook
v.itli blue eyes that have smile wrin
kles, iu the corners, just like his own,
and crinkly dark hair, just like his
own, too, bending pver the stove.
She is just tasting the something
that smells so good, w ith a spoon.
When she sees the big man in the
door she tastf sv so quickly that she
l.urns her tongue! But she can .use
it just the same, even if it is burned.
She runs .to the big man and says,
"And is that yoursetf, now, Larry,
darling? Snre, I'm that glad to see
"$rou I've scalded myself with the
soup!"
The big man had just time to saj',
"Sure, Eileen, you were always a
great one for burning yourself. Do
y,.u remember that day at Grannie
Malone's" when out into . the
kitchen tumble a little Larry and a
little Elileen and a baby. They have
heard his voice' and they fall upon
the King of the Crossing as if he
weren't a king at all, but just a plain,
ordinary tincl.
They take off his cap and rumple
hif hair. They get into his pockets
and find some peppermints there.
And the baby even tries to get the
silver star off his breast to put into
her mouth.
"Look at that, now!" cries Uncle
Larry. "Get along with you! Is it
trying to take me off the force, you
are? Sure, that star was never in
tended by the city for you to cut
your teeth on!"
"She'll poison herself with the
things she s always after putting in
her mouth!" cries the menher. She
More Truth Than Poetry
By JAMES J. MONTAGUE
t
me, ,.i
THE CHILD AND THE MILLIONAIRE.
Idler.
Reemtlr at Lenox a imU boy .pureed a nickel offered him by John D. Rock.
' As old John D. sat on the porch
To take the mountain air, v
He saw a mildvnd gentle child
' At play beside his chair.
His fingers in his pockets delved,
- And presently withdrew.
A glittering and radiant thing
A nickel, bright and new.
"Take this, my child," the old man said,
Leave off your idle play,
Jnvest this gift with careful thrift, -
And you'll be rich some day.
With such a handsome property,
You'll learn the love of toil,
And may, like me, at' eighty-three,
Possess the Standard Oil."
The little child held up his, hand,
Palm outward in alarm,
And, deeply piqued it shrilly Mirieked,-
"Free gifts do naught but harm.
Though of the proletariat, -
I have not sunk so low
" That I'm content to take a eent
Without a quid pro-quo!"
Now honor to the little child
That valiantly did spurn
As worthless trash a sum of cash ,
It knew it could not earn!
And now our simple tale is done,
We reach the moral which
Concludes it, viz. : That urchin is
Not destined to get rich!
WHICH HE DOES:
Apparently Villa would rather fight than be president.
THERE'S A LIMIT.
In Lenine's claim of ultimate' world domination he says nothing
about conquering Ireland.
. WHICH WILL HELP A LITTLE. i
' Clothes to Be Made From Paper Headline. That ought to make
them last longer than they do now.
- ' (Copyrifht, 1920, by The Bell Syndicate, Inc.)
j
-Remodeling Sale !
Laclies' Linda Belle
House Dresses
Worth Up to $7.50 each,
Remodeling Sale Price r
$2.98
'Latest patterns, all sizesstyles
and colors, made of finest ging
ham and percales. Don't fail o
take advantage of this wonder
ful bargain.
PHILLIP'S
A DEPARTMENT STORE t
seizes the baby and sets her in a safe
corner by herself, gives her a spoon
and says, "There, now you can be
cutting your teeth on that."
And when the children have quite
worn Uucle Larry out he sits- upon
the floor, where they have him by
this time, and runs his fingers
through his hair, which is standing
straight up, and says to the mother,
"Sure, Eileen, when you and I were
children on the old sod we were
never such spalpeens as the likes of
these! They have me destroyed en
tirely, and me the biggest policeman
on the force! Is it American they
are, or Irish, I want to know?"
"It's Irish-American we are,"
shouts little "Larry.
"And with the heft of both cou
tries in your fists," groans big
Larry
(Bights reserved hr Houghton
Mifflin Co.)
Parents' Problems
4. How can citiicnship best be
taught to children?
Read with them the lives of great
men 'who served their country
Washington, Lincoln. Jefferson and
Roosevelt. Teach them their re
sponsibilities as citizens. Be care
ful to fulfill your own!
Women lawyers in Philadelphia
have formed an organization known
as "The Portia Club."
AMISEMKNTS.
HEATRE
TONIGHT, SATURDAY, SUNDAY
Saturday Matinee
BOOTH TARNNGTOtfS
qreaUrtCotrlrc
Vltfhta, SOc-$2.SO; Matinee. S0c-S2.00
FOUR NIGHTS, Thur Auff 26
COMMENCING 1 nurM Ug. V
Matinee Saturday Seat Tomorrow
THE REVUE INIMITABLE
(WW
What Do You Know?
i' (Here'n a chanra to make your nil
north money, fcaeli Ih.v The lleo will
tmbllali a aerie of question, prepared
i.v Superintendent ,1. II. Itevrridfre of the
public arhuula. They cover thin which
jiiu xhoiild know. The firt rompleto lit
of 'urrcet onwer received will be reward
ed by SI. The answer and the name of
the winner will be puhllnhed on the day
Indiented below. Be aure fo jive your
views mill addresa in full. Addreea "Quy
(lon Editor," Omaha llee.)
By J, H. BEVERIDGE.
1. What is the diameter of a Ford
piston?
2. What docs Procter & Gamble
manufacture?
3. What is the best resistance
wire for electrical current?
4. What is a sacrifice hit in base
ball? '
-5. What is the meaning of deuce
in tennis?
(Answers Published Tuesday.)
TUESDAY'S ANSWERS.
1. What is the name of the largest
ship? Leviathan.
AM I HEME tS.
, . OMAHA'S FUN CENTER"
Th Rainbow Division of BurlMtu
rs"V1CTORY BELLES"
. With Eddie Dal and Scottl Frledtll
Lv.wr: Evvjthinrv
SEATS READY THURS.. 10:00 A. M.
BASE BALL
ROURKE PARK
OMAHA TULSA
AUGUST 19-20-21-22
FRIDAY LADIES' DAY
TWO GAMES SUNDAY
Fir.t Game Called 2:15 P. M.
Box Seat en Sale Barkalovr Bros.
Cijar Store, 16th and Famam.
Regular Season
Opens
SUNDAY MAT.
AUGUST 22
With
Matine Every Day,' 2;1S.
On Show Every Night, 8:15.
Sva Bi-Tim Vaudeville Act.
All th Orpheum Comforts and Con
venience with Orpheum Courtesy.
Seat Sale Starts 9 A. M.,
Friday, August 20.
FHOTO-PLAVfe.
mm
I
"V
Today Tomorrow
The Great
Mystery Photodrama,
"ONE
HOUR
BEFORE
DAWN"
' ALSO
Charlie
Chaplin
l in
"The
immigrant'-
TWO SHOWS IN ONE
THE CAPPS FAMILY
A Unique Novelty Presented In an
Original Way"
THREE EDDY SISTERS
"A Study in Daintineas"
Singing and Dancing
LYONS & WEST
Black-Face Comedians
ELDORA & CO.
"Sensational Manipulation of Heavy -
weigh l"
PHOTOPLAY ATTRACTION
"LAHOMA"
A Drama of the Early Days in
- Oklahoma
An Edgar Lewi Production
Mack Sennet Comedy
PHOTO-PJLAYS.
APOLLO
JT ELSIE FERG
Coolest Theater i
In th City
FERCUSON in
2. Which automobile is advertised
as the most beautiful car iu America?
i'aige.
3. Which car is advertised by
"ask the mail who owns one." Tack'
ard.
4. What automobile firm adver
tises "when better cars are built we
build them?" Buick.
S. What car is advertised as "The
Sensible Six?" Oakland.
Winner:; Mrs. C. E. Strahle,
Gothenburg, Xeb.
COMMON SENSE
Copyright, lOS", Tnternntlonal Feature
Service, Inc.
The Home Town Changes.
By J. J. MUNDr.
Don't expect when you see that
old friend of yours that you are go
ing to occupy as important a place
with him as you thought you did
once when you were his daily com
panion. Your friendNias been surrounded
by many friends since you left.
It is quite likely that some of these
friends are more to him than you
ever were in the old days.
7. mn.r l-,-t .rr-,,1 frt m ' 1 It K,,t '
it is just as well lor you to be pre
pared for what may seem to you
shabby and cold treatment.
' You are going to visit the old
town you have not seen in years,
but you will not find the same old in
terest in you and your plans and
your personal affairs as you thought
the old town felt when you went
away.
You have located in a big city
made few friends and have kept
the old memories green while you
longed to be back home.
You have not grown away from
these closest friends, but they have
grown away from you and have be-
AMl'SEMICNTS.
AMI SKMEM'S.
"HIS HOUSE IN ORDER"
NEWS and COMEDY
DON'T MISS
The Big 4 Brotherhood Dance.
Outing and Picnic at
KRUG PARK Thursday and Friday
1 -
Afternoon and Evening
BIG BARBECUE TONIGHT
ALSO PRIZE WALTZ
Athletic Eyents Galore with a Prize to
Each and Every Winner.
TODAY
SATURDAY'
TODAY
SATURDAY
Good pictures, like good books, never grow old or tire
some. . Therefore, one of the greatest pictures has been
retreated and republished, asking the question, "Should '
a wife compete with other women for her husband's
love?" ,
Elliott Dexter in
xi rw
Theodora Roberts
Tully Marshall
Wanda Hawley
Sylvia Ashton
PHOTO-PLAYS.
PHOTO-PUVYS.
I r frs
ETHEL
ZLAYTOfe
Streets
PHOTO-PLAYS.
PHOTO-PLAYS.
mm
Today and Saturday
BOYS
and
Muse, Club Matinees
FREE
Souvenir Rubber
BALLOONS
1
For AH Members
Special Admission to
Club Members, 10c
Membership Cards Free,
for the Asking.
GRAND PRIZES
Today and Saturday
Handsome Gold Finish
POCKETNlVES
For the Boys
One-Half Pound
BOXES OF CANDY
For the Girls
Photoplay Feature
BRYANT
IVASIIBURN
in a big, powerful, grip
ping detective drama
THE
ALSTER CASE
Only One More Day To See
In the Great
, Robertson
Cole
Super Special
. THE
WONDER''
MAN
A thrilling drama of
International Intrigue
with a prize fight scene
that has a real knockout!
Kg JTi MT Ml'fWWMW m Tinny
0
V
i
y
COMING SUNDAY
"THE LIFELINE"
A Tourneur Production
Also a Big Comedy
24tk and O Streets
South Side
'., aaaaaaaaaaai
m o