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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (May 29, 1919)
THE BEE: OMAHA. THURSDAY. MAY 29. 1919. The Omaha Bee DAILY (MORNING) EVENING SUNDAY FOUNDED BY EDWARD BOSEWATEB VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR TH BEE PUBLISHING COMPANY. PROPRIETOR MEMBER OF ASSOCIATED PRESS Tha AjaodtUd Pra, of which Tha Be 1l a member, li tzoluitnl; entitled to Uu w fnr publication of all newe dlepttctaee credited M It or aot otherwtee ondtted la thli paper, end alio the local nave published hmln. All rlfhu of publication of our areola! dispatches era also reeamd. OFFICES t Nov Tort Ms Ftflh Are. Omaha The Be Bids. Chicago 1TJ0-J3 Stefer Bid. South Omaha SSU N St St. Louie New B'nk of commsms Counell Bluff 14 N. Mala It Weatalnstoo 1111 6 Bt, Llnooln Uttle Building. APRIL CIRCULATION " Daily 65,830 Sunday 63,444 Ararat circulation for the month aubecrlbed and morn to Dj S. JL Bn. Circulation Menegai. Subscribers lavin( th city should hav Th Be mailed to them. Addree changed a often as requested. Decorate tomorrow as you never did before! It will be a real Memorial Dayfor Omaha. However the Baptists may line up on pro hibition, they remain as wet as ever on religion. Any secrets the United States may have in regard to poison gas may well remain secrets. All Nebraska is headed for Omaha now, and bent on the one mission, to welcome the "Fight ing Farmers." Texas stands for the water-wagon, all right, but turns down the ladies. Pretty close discrimination. Mexico it making much headway in the manufacture of war material. Where is it to be used? One proclamation issued by the mayor all can subscribe to is the one calling on everybody to take part in the welcoming exercises. Turn out It yet lacks a month of being ten years since Bleirot flew across the English channel and set all the world, to wondering. Some goings on since then. The election commissioner permits the ladies to guess at their height, but insists on their telling their exact age, which may be legal, but is not gallant. The I. W. V. turns to "The New Freedom" to support its doctrine, but this is not the first time the livery of heaven has been stolen to serve the devil in. Joy riding ia not yet any safer than it used to be in the dear old wide-open days, but this is no reason for going back to them. It is just a suggestion to joy-riders. Kolchak is to have both moral and material support in his efforts at rebuilding Russia.. It is well to have somebody as energetic as he to get behind this needed work. The enveloping movement started by the ad ministration supporters has not proceeded far enough to surround "Jimmy" Reed, but he may be brought to the reservation yet. Chairman Cummings of the democratic na tional committee says Mr. Wilson may be a candidate for a third term if the league plan is defeated. Is that a threat or a promise? Portugal also gets into line, pinning a hand some decoration on an American sailor. In a little while we will have accumulated almost verything Europe has to offer of this nature. A Kansas City promoter thinks he sees $20, 000,000 worth of prosperity for Omaha in a goods roads campaign. More than that, brother, and we are just getting ready to ex tract some of it. Ships for New Orleans is now part of the Omaha Chamber of Commerce's program. The value of the southern outlet was pointed out by The Bee many years ago, and is now coming to be generally understood. "W. J. B." still is optimistic; he now sees permanent peace as the fruit of the League of Nations. We can not forget, though, that it was he who told W. Dumba that the first note t Germany did not mean anything. What a sad, sad thing it is that the democrats were not able to split the republican party in the senate. But goodness knows, they tried hard enough. The future is anything but roseate for the followers of the donkey. Army officers who did not get across while the fighting was going on are drawing consila "'ion prizes in form of assignments overseas to relieve those now on stationv there. This will e better than never to have fought at all. Senator Underwood's demand that the woman suffrage amendment be sent to a com mittee, that it may be "carefully studied," in dicates that the democratic opposition to the measure will die hard. However, it will not de feat the movement. Jusl Push the Button Without making any noise about it nothing in way of thunder clap the electrical wizards from time to time are putting over new wonder stunts in the way of harnessing the invisible fluid, or spirit, or whatever else electricity is. The electric wizards from all over gathered at Atlantic City on Monday and, in connection with the convention, there is an electrical exhibition on one of the big piers. Electrical inventors have generally turned experimental effort to making electric energy useful in an everyday, commonplace way. Heat ing by electricity is not so new, but freezing by electricity is a new one on most of us. But an electric "refrigerator" plant is reported t as an exhibit on the ocean-front electric show. The electric refrigerating machine is said to be about the size of a vacuum cleaner. An elec tric freezer atached to an icebox renders ice an unnecessary commodity, but the current scoVes on the meter measure right along. Elec tric freezing costs just the same as electric heat , ing or electric lighting. The bill comes promptly it the end of each month and the bookkeeper at the power office doesn't bother about whether the current was used for cooking, sweeping, sundering, lighting or freezing. But, listen to this there is a laundrying machine that washes the clothes from socks to pajamas, wrings them dry and smooths them with the iron. All that the house lady does is to dump the wash and push the button the intelligent and highly efficient machine does the rest.: Sounds rood, doesn't it? Baltimore American -- IS MR. WILSON GETTING TIRED? The delicate hint conveyed by Mr. Wilson from Paris, to the effect that he is glad his term of presidency is coming to its close, is susceptible of several constructions. Casual thinkers will be inclined, perhaps, to interpret it as meaning he hopes to retire in 1921. These will do well to recall that he was elected on a platform that pledged its candidate to a single term. Ample reason for ignoring this pledge was found long before his first two years in office had passed, andit was conceded in 1915 that, in spite of the Baltimore platform, whose many other promises were scrupulously ignored or kept in letter only, Mr. Wilson would succeed himself. That no American president has ever had a third term does not count Mr. Wilson has done a great many things his predecessors carefully refrained from. He loves to break precedent; that is why he is In Paris today. He is coy, but not more so than he was in 1912, only in a different way. Years have given him a better understanding of the ways of politics, and while it is fair to take him at his word, that he anticipates with pleas ure the approaching end of his second term, those aspiring democrats who would like to see their names at the head of the ticket in 1920 will make no mistake if they reckon with the possibility of Woodrow Wilson and Thomas Riley Marshall appearing as an irresistible combination before the convention of their party when it meets. Program for Social Service. The Baptist convention at Denver adopted a program for future action by the church that is both comprehensive and interesting. Natur ally, the propagation of religion comes first, followed, rather singularly, by a declared in tention to combat social disease. To counteract the influence of "yellow" 4publications and the spread of seditions will next engage the atten tion of the Baptists, who also will aid in making a survey of the natural resources of the coun try and a study of land tenure. Industrial rela tions are to be put on a basis of the propor tional interest of labor, capital and public, or as the resolution names them, "investors, manag ers, workers and the community." Just which of these latter will come first is not suggested, but it may be the church will be able to figure out some way for harmonizing the difficulties now presented, and adjusting the division of product on a basis that will be sat isfactory to all. And any hope that is ex pressed in this regard will be extended to in clude all the other principal items in the pro gram. Outlines of future church activity, however, indicate that the war has taught the sectarians nothing. Denominational differences remain as firmly set as ever, and dogmatic tenets have lost none of their rigidity. At St. Louis the Presbyterians declined to allow woman an equal share in the affairs of the church, although through all the world the tendency is to sex equality in political and administrative matters. Close reading of the Baptist's record discloses no indication of relaxation of any of the discipline of the sect, and this experience is repeated wherever examination is made. Hopeful persons who had expected some modification in religious thought and endeavor to come out of the war are finding that human nature withstood the experience as the "shad rach" does the fervent heat of the furnace, and has come back changed very little. The help fulness of the'Baptist program may not be in creased by its sectarianism, but it will be of use as it is carried out in the spirit of humanity, re gardless of creed. Daniels for a Smaller Navy. Josephus Daniels has reversed himself as a proper naval construction program. He no longer insists on "a navy second to none," but will be content with a navy that will show our faith in the League of Nations as a defensive bulwark. As the secretary of navy has been suspected of not being entirely sincere in his original proposal that the United States go in for naval supremacy, his change in attitude will not especially surprise nor seriously alarm anyone. Some observers believe they could see in the declaration that we would build "a navy second to none" a sort of hint to Great Britain that some concessions on the "freedom of the sea" issue might be interposed. The British declined to take serious note of the proposal, and even Anjericans failed to get warmed up by it. Great Britain's supremacy at sea is acknowledged, and unchallenged; America's in terests are secure, with a naval establishment capable of expansion as our maratime concerns increase, and no reason can be descried for en tering competition with any country for the largest navy. This, however, is not enough to excuse the total abandonment of the naval construction program. Economy is expected, but not at the expense of safety, and while we nationally have given support to the principle involved in the League of Nations and almost certainly will accept its form, we must not trust it so im plicitly that we will fail entirely to make ar rangements for maintaining our dignity abroad and safety at home. In the absence of a re newal of the proposal for an intermission in naval construction or a definite determination by the League of Nations of the extent to which we may maintain armament at sea, the secretary of the navy will not find an inclina tion generally to follow him in his leap from the greatest navy to none. Firing a hydrogene gun may add to the noise Omaha expects to make when giving wel come to the Eighty-ninth, but it will not pro vide anything in the way of novelty to the "Fighting Farmers," who went through all the fighting in the Meuse-Argonne campaign, and were twice in the front line. They know more about cannonading than Nebraska will ever be able to tell. Germans staged a peace celebration at Ver sailles, but not the kind they had planned on holding. Shouting "Hurrah for peace!" may re lieve their feelings, but it will get them no credit on the bill. Mayor Smith is finding out that little boys were allowed to wager their pennies, and even greater sums at the "circus" whose presence in the city was unknown to the superintendent of police. If King Albert does not come to Omaha when he visits the United States, he will miss the best part of the show. Improving Labor Situation From the New York Times. The resumption of work in the mills of sev eral cities of New England marks the termina tion of a gronp of labor troubles, iucluding the strike that has disturbed Lawren.e since Feb ruary. The workers get both shorter hours and higher pay, and get them by agreement with the employers in all good-will, except in Lawrence. There there was a strike, which, for a time threatened to take the course of the strike here in 1912. In that year the I. W. W. directed events, and there were riots and killings on a lamentable scale. This year, too, there were disorders, but the authorities had learned their lesson as well as the strikers, or rather better. As in Seattle, it was seen in time that the preservation of order is more important than the winning of any strike and order was main tained as ruthlessly as it was assailed by those who care more for the overthrow of govern ment than for the welfare of labor. Since 1912, sentiment in Lawrence has changed and there was no general sympathy with the strikers as there was in that year. Neither was the Lawrence strike supported by any union in good standing. The United Textile Workers called the strike, but disavowed it when it took the form of an attack on American institutions, and the American Federation of Labor joined in the disavowal. The collapse of the strike, therefore, is a triumph for the good sort of unionism, as well as a defeat for the bad sort. The cause of the strike was that the Law rence mills refused to concede the demand for a 48-hour week with 54 hours' pay. The shorter hours were conceded readily enough, for the cancellation of war- orders, and the lack of civilian orders had left half the machinery with out anything to do. The manufacturers ex plained this, and the workers did not even ask for the increased pay at first. Only in Law rence was this position taken, under the stim ulation of outside agitators. Some of them were characterized by one of the Lawrence judges in a disorder case as "boudoir bol sheviki." The foremost agitator was a clergy man of several denominations, and an actor in religious as well as labor troubles. And there was an eruption of "sociologists," eager to distribute prosperity with other people's property. The disorders became so serius that the Massachusetts Board of Conciliation made an inquiry into the situation and reported that the strike was "subversive of the rights of indi viduals and of private property and revolution ary in tendencies, creating terrorism, preventing the resumption of work, disturbing the ordi nary business relations of the community and destructive to orderly government." A strike of that sort deserves to fail, for it is rather a political than a labor strike. The failure is worth insisting upon for two reasons. Firstly, the lesson is that when strikes are of that sort they should be met with firmness rather than sympathy, for the general interest suffers more than labor can profit. And, sec ondly, the result of this strike should teach labor that it can gain more by peaceful than by forceful methods. What it was not pos sible to concede to threats in Lawrence, under the conditions of that time, it is now possible under better business conditions to give freely to Dover, Lowell, Fall River, New Bedford and, in fact, the whole industry of New England. The I. W. W. will be weakened and the American Federation of Labor will be strengthened by the failure of the attempt to set unionists against both other unionists and capital. The moral is, as )le Hanson says, that "labor will form the main guard against the red menace in this country," for he admitted that the I. W. W. hated Gompers more than it hates him. The Seattle and Lawrence precedents of how to meet strikes against community interests may be commended to Canadian observation, where the method of conciliation, which is such a credit to the good will of the Canadian government seem to be useless. Unemploy ment is the greatest danger of the world under present conditions, and there is too much of it here, where there is least excuse for it. Record ing to the report of the New York Industrial Commission in this state, in 1918 there were 1,519,884 days, 48 centuries, of strike idleness. It is easier to say what labor lost than what labor gained by it, and it is agreeable to add that the latest reports are the most reassuring that such danger is no longer to be feared. The decline in number of workers, according to the commission, has been "halted," and the volume of employment is now 45 per cent above the pre-war level. Paradox of German Reparation To the German contention that the repara tion terms of the peace treaty impose a burden greater than Germany can possibly bear, the allied council replies that "all the nations of Europe are suffering from losses and are bear ing and will continue to bear burdens which are almost more than they can carry." There folows from this manifest fact that in industrial helpfulness to Germany, as well as in sample justice to the countries devastated by the Ger man armies, Germany should make all pos sible reparation. All are in much the same boat. The nations are interdependent economically. None can prosper from the continued poverty of others. German rehabilitation cannot be hindered but must be helped by German aid in the rehabilita tion of countries far worse sufferers from the ravages of Germany's war. This truth is well expressed in President Wilson's message to congress, wherein it is said that "prosperity in one part of the world ministers to prosperity everywhere," and that "there is in a very true sense a solidarity of interest throughout the world of enterprise." What, therefore, appears as paradoxial in the allied reply is clearly a fact: "There is no reason whatever why Ger many, under the new conditions, should not build up for herself a position, both of stability and prosperity, in the European world." When the Germans complain that the treaty of peace sells them into slavery, they forget that the war sold alt the belligerents into slavery and all of them must work their way out to gether. Even after making reparation, Ger many is likely to be as well off as any other European country. New York World. The Day We Celebrate. A. H. Benton, of the Union Loan Investment company, born 1846. Dr. A. S. Pinto, practicing physician and sur geon, now a lieutenant-colonel in France, born 1872. Commander Alexander Ramsay, R. N., who recently married Princess Patricia of Con naught, born 38 years ago. Rear Admiral Herbert O. Dunn, U. S. N., commandant of the First naval district at Bos ton, born at Westerly, R. I., 62 years ago. Marc Klaw, of the theatrical firm of Klaw & Erlanger, born at Paducah, Ky., 61 years ago. ago. M. Leon Bourgeois, French statesman and several times premier, born in Paris, 68 years ago. Gilbert K. Chesterton, English journalist and author, born in Kensington, 45 years ago today. Fred T. Dubois, former United States sena tor from Idaho, born in Crawford county, 111., 68 years ago. Thirty Years Ago in Omaha. Mrs. Robert R. Livingston has presented Robert R. Livingston Post No. 282, G. A. R., with a fine picture of her deceased husband. Omaha holds second place in the Western Base Ball association, St. Paul being first. Thatcher, Primrose and West's minstrel com pany opened at the Boyd to a crowded house. About 2,000 people saw the equestrients win an exciting race from lady bicyclers at the 1 ColiseutOj Friend of the Soldier Replies will be given in this column to questions relating to the soldier and his prob lems, in and out of the army. Names will not be printed. Ask T h e B e e to Answer. Soldiers' and Sailors' Insurance. The matter of the conversion of government Insurance Into the new types of policies, Is one of vital con cern to all persons carrying govern ment Insurance. Now that congress has been convened, conversion will undoubtedly be authorized within a very short time and the campaign will then be on in earnest. A great many men who are carrying insur ance are undecided as to the type of policy into which to convert because of the fact that their knowledge of insurance is very limited. In order to help these men so that they may be able to convert into the types of policies best fitted to their own par ticular needs, we are going to give a series of articles which will ex plain in a general way the provis ions of the various policies so that they may understand what each policy is. The six policies offered by the government are as follows: Ordi nary life; 20-payment life; 30-pay-ment life; 20-year endowment; 30 year endowment, and an endowment policy maturing at age 62. Ordinary Life Policy. The ordinary life policy, more commonly known as straight life, is a policy that is figured on the whole life of an individual. Every insur ance has a beginning and an ending. The ordinary life policy is based on the natural life of an individual, and according to the tables of mortality the natural life of every man must end at age 96, therefore, this policy is computed on the basis of age 96. From this it can be readily seen that the ordinary life policy is a very cheap long-term policy, and this fact makes it the cheapest policy written.. The insured pays premiums as Jong as he lives. This policy Is a pure protection policy. The insured carries it with only one thought in mind that of affording protection to his family. He never expects to realize any thing from this policy himself. It Is a very attractive policy to men with families who need as much protec tion as they can get and have only a limited amount of money to buy this protection. It gives a maxi mum of protection for a minimum initial cost. The chief objection to this policy lies in the fact that a man pays premium as long as he lives. He can never look forward to the time when the payment of premiums will end, and there is a grave possibility that in old age, the very time when protection is most essential, he will be unable to make these payments. The yearly premium on the gov ernment policy is as follows on each $1,000 of insurance: Age 20... $13. 58 i Age 30.. .$17. 36 Age 25... 25.24 Age 35... 20.08 For further information address: Conservation Section, Uureau of War Risk Insurance, Washington, D. C. SAVK THIS AKT1CLK. Delay In Allotment Payments. Mrs. M. K. D. No sailing date has been assigned the 3tith division as yet, but under plans that have been announced, it ought to be on its way over with within a very short time. Motor transport com pany No. 533 has been in the service of supply, with headquarters at Co-lombey-Ies-Belles; it is included in the general order which aims at dis continuance of the service of sup ply of the army in France by the middle of July, but Just when it will start for home we can not tell you. The Bureau of War Risks was un able to pay allotments because the appropriation had been exhausted and congress adjourned in March without making new appropriation. The first thing the present congress did was to provide money to pay allotments, and the bureau at Washington is now sending out the delayed vouchers as fast as it can. jft&e folds' C072 DREAMLAND ADVENTURE By DADDY. (Pegtry and Billy, trying to help save the farm of Widow Clancey from Miser Jenkins, are captured by the miser. The Bronze Genie cornea to the widow s aid.) The Miser Dances. mOO late, It's after 6 o'clock! JL The farm Is mine!" repeated Miser Jenkins, but as he said It his voice shook as If the sight of the Mighty Bronze Genie had given him an ague chill. "It's only a little after 5 o'clock. The debt is not due until 6," ttiun dered the Genie. "See my watch. It says 20 min utes past 6," quavered Miser Jen kins. "And the clock it Is twenty min utes after hour," sobbed Widow Clancey. "Thunderatlon!" growled the Genie. "My watch surely Isn't an hour slow. Is this some miserly trick?" "You can see for yourself. You have come 20 minutes too late. The farm is mine." Peggy, Billy and Pat, bound and gagged and locked in the closet, heard this talk in silent indignation. They were silent for the reason that the miser had so tied up their mouths that they couldn't utter a sound. But the miser in binding them had forgotten one thing he hadn't fastened their feet. Now Bil ly took advantage of this fact. He 'Oh, Yow' Oh, Wow! Whoop! Zowle!" '-Screamed the Miser, and He Began to Dance. began to kick lustily at the door of the closet. "Geewhillickers, what's that?" thundered the Genie. "Must he the horses In the barn," quavered Miser Jenkins. "I'll go and see. I've got to be getting back to town anyway." You'll stay right here!" roared the Genie loudly. Again Billy kicked on the door, and Peggy and Pat Joined the racket. The Genie strode across the room, dragging the miser with him. While one hand clutched the miser by the coat collar the Genie's other hand threw the closet door open. "Thunderatlon!" ex claimed the Genie, tearing away the gags. Who has dared to treat my master and my mistress In such bar barous fashion?" "It was the miser did It," gasped Pegy. "And he set the clock and his watch ahead an hour," gurgled Billy. "i 'h. ho! That's why 6 o'clock came so early!" roared the Genie. "I knew there was some trickery about it." "You can't prove I did it," miavered the miser. "The clock says it is after 6 o'clock, and this farm now belongs to me." "Oh, ho, does it?" thundered the Genie. He shot out one big hand and grasped the miser by his hair, forcing him to his knees. With the other hand the Genie drew the glit tering scimitar from its scabbard, swishing it through the air until it fairly hummed. "You'll need only one small hole in the earth when I get through with you." "Oh, spare him," shrieked Peggy. "Don't cut off his head." "Take him out in the yard if you're going to do it," pleaded Widow Clancey. "Don't muss up my clean kitchen with his gore." The Genie stopped swishing his scimitar and looked at Widow Clancey. "That sounds like good sense," he said, though a bit disappointedly. "It would smatter things up a lot if I cut him in two. "Don't you cut off my head. I'll have the law on you If you do," screamed the miser. "Well, if I can't cut you up I ran roast you whole," thundered the Genie, sheathing his scimitar. "To the hot place for you." With that he jerked the miser to his feet, picked him up bodily, and tossed him on top of the kitchen stove. "Ow, yow! Oh, wow! Whoop! Zowie!" screamed the miser, and he began to dance with all his might to keep his feet from scorching. (Tomorrow will be told what' Lieutenant Mike finds when he comes marching home. ) DAILY DOT PUZZLE e 11 " 17 K 16 8 -21 11 2 b 2 i 28 29 5b A lb w3o 27 .3) 38. 2I2Z 39 4i. 4o . '47 5 53 45 57 .42 48 4b " .'43 43 5o I . am Who is here? Looks so queer. Draw from one to two and as on to the end. UfvJZ flees ox Many Questions Answered. A Reader Military police com pany 223 is in the service of sup ply; see answer to Mrs. M. E. D., foregoing. Motor transport corps repair unit No. 310 is at headquar ters army of occupation and no date for the sailing has been announced. Anxious When balloon company No. 24 was transferred from the Second to the Third army it was with the understanding it would be held indefinitely in the army of oc cupation. R. A. J. Announcement has been made that general headquarters at Chaumont will be broken up by the middle of July; no date has been announced for the departure of the headquarters units. A Soldier's Sweetheart No time has been fixed for the sailing of the 11th veterinary hospital unit now at Gievres, but it will not be kept there much longer, as the government plans on getting all the soldiers out of France within six weeks. The 115th engineers have been serving with the Sixth army corps, which has been broken up, its divisions Be ing released for return. This In cludes the engineers. An Anxious Mother The Sixth di vision has been released for return to the home station, although no date has been set for its sailing yet. This includes ambulance company No. 37. An Anxious Sister No time has been set for the sailii'S of pro visional cook company No. 1, now at Brest. Miss Z. R. You do not state what branch of the service you want to know about. There are many com panies bearing the number 254, so please tell the rest of the designa tion and we will try to answer your question. DAILY CARTOONETTE " ' MAHAM, RU.0W ME TO HLP YOU ACROSS TH 15 SLIPPERY STREET? WDHED Took a Jolt to Start Him. Omaha. May 26. To the Editor of The Bee: A few datys ago The Bee published a . article roasting the police department for allowing gambling on the carnival grounds. At that time I did not sanction the article, thinking, perhaps, there might be a little personal animosity connected with it, but since the arti cle appeared I have had a little ex perience myself with the method this administration is following to the detriment of their supporters, and am now in a position to offer The Bee words of encouragement for fu ture exposures. For 20 years I have supported the republican party in Omaha, but no more for me, and forgiveness is all 1 ask for support ing the present administration; it was unadulterated ignorance on my part. I didn't know there was a circus in town. T. J. TATROE. Talking at the Movies. Omaha, May 26. To the Editor of The Bee: The "Movie Fan" who complains of the annoyance caused him by persons in the picture thea ters reading from the screens ex plaining the shows, and so forth, ex presses my feelings exactly. But we differ in one point. The "Movie Fan" thinks men as bad as women. I find it to be nearly always women women who want to be both seen and heard and surely they are the IN THE BEST OF HUMOR. Crawford Since he became a magnate his expanses are enormous. I'rahahaw No wonder. He hires a doctor to keep him out of bed and a lawyer to keep him out of jail. Life. Husband That new cook Is certainly quiet. One would never know that she was about the place. Wife She Isn't. She left this morning. Answers. I go to a picture show to rest my mind a while and relax, to have it all spoiled by some woman making a nuisance of herself, I feel that I'd love to see her led to the door and put out. Some that do not read the screens nor talk, sit there and cluck their old tongues at every feature until I feel like choking them. "Would that God the giftie gie us to see oursels as others see us." CONSIDERATE. A negro was trying to saddle a mule, when a bystander asked: 'Hoes That, mule ever kick you?" "No, sun, but he kicks sometimes where Isa Jes' been." Berkshire Eagle. Mrs. Bacon This paper says that they are going to do away with pockets In men's clothing. Mr. Bacon Another blow at woman s rights, my dear Yonlter's Statesman. "Senator, these ladies have collected a lot of your speeches." "Um." "Don't you feel flattered? "Dunno Do they want 'em; to read or to make a bonfire with?" Detroit Free Press. Blondine Doesn't Gerty Glddlgad make up something awful? Brunetta Yes, I don't know whether It is her eyesight that is bad or her Judg ment. Youngstown, Telegram. First Artist Been doing anything lately ' Second Artist Oh, knocked off a couple of girl's heads last week and finished off the mayor of Mudmouth. Old Lady Bolsheviks! London Opinion. "I see vour grandpa doesn't help you around the store any more." "Nope: couldn't break him of the habit of sticking a potato on the spout of every nil rn Them days are gone and past." Louisville Courier-Journal. "Tour boy Josh will be permitted to wear hlg soldier clothes for several months" "Yes." answered Farmer Corntaseel, with a trace of discontent in his tone; "an' then mother'll make 'em over an' expect me to wear 'em for several years." Washington Star. Frienrl You don't seem to be worrying i about the bone-dry law Saloonkeeper Why should I? Before it goes into effect we may have to amend the constitution of the League of Nations. JtfUge. President and Senate. Omaha, May 25. To the Editor of The Bee: Might it not have been better for the American people had our president appointed about four of the longest-headed states men from the United States senate to .have gone over to Paris and helped negotiate peace and see what could be done in regard to a league of nations? If he could have got out of his democratic rut and real ized that all parties joined hands and bought bonds and sent their sons to die on foreign soil, and have made it about two of the leading republican and two leading demo cratic senators, don't you suppose they could have formulated as good a peace treaty and in as short a time and their draft of a league would more likely have met with the ap proval of the United States senate? But it might have detracted from Colonel House a little, and Presi dent Wilson might have thought it rather tame for him to stay in Washington and just be mere pres ident of the United States. Yet 1 for one think we might have come out of the affair with American in terests better protected and have retained more respect from foreign nations, and we would have re spected ourselves more and had a president not too large for his job. but right on the job. Great Britain did not have to take its king, nor did any of the other powers. They all had men big enough for the job, but the United States had but one man big enough for the job. Had he from any cause been swept from the stage of action beforehand, what would the world have done for a league of nations? J. OTTO MARTIN. "Business Is Cooo.ThankYou -WHY, rCememter tKe "tension resonator system ojTpiano con struction. exclusive xvitH the - is tke onlv: system, preventing tKe sounding aboard from losing; its crown" crrvder tynv atmcs' jpheric conJitiorv5. Hence tke matclv less andimperisKablc teawty pVAasorv Homlirv torve. jyotx Jioxtr an2 vemy Cash or terms. Liberty Bond for down payment. We also sell the Kranich & Bach, Vose & Sons, Brambach, Bush Lane, Kim ball and Cable-Nelson. SUB ia 1513 Douglas Street. The Art and Music Store. l.V. Nicholas Oil Company DR. G. W. TODD I wish to announce my New Location Fourth Floor of the Barker Block I will move in June Into my new quarters and will be prepared to give Better Service. 1 have more room and larger equipment. Present Location 403 Brandeis Building. A JOY PICTURE. Th' gladflpst thing In the world that's glad, Er that's what I think's, a little tad. With a piece of bread, an' & horn to blow. An' a step to st on. No one don't know Anything that's happier much, I guess; By Jlng I g't such a tenderness When I see a Ittle old tad like that I feel like settln' down where he's at. An' askln' him. with a friendly smile. To let me toot on his horn a while. Or for a bite of his 'lasses bread A little hit of a toualehead A settln' there on a step like that "With a tootln' horn, ana a old straw nat Right there Inside him. is just all right! He will swing hla foot, an'll take a bite Of his 'lasses bread, an' then blow his horn; An' just as sur as you ve been born, Ie knows more gladness than anything That was ever thought of could give a king. A king ain't mucti ain't one-half as As hini Twaitlng there for his dad. With hrad an' butler, and 'lasses, too; No artist feller has ever drew A picture hreathin' so much o joy As one like that of a little boy A settln' there with his old straw hat; I want to set down by where he's at An" coax him. pattln' his yellow head. Xa simius bits of bis 'lasses bread. Sap 7cTfor inrnriTSand mvALiDS ASK FOR The Original Nourishing Digestible No Cooking For Infants, Invalids and Growing Children, i Rich .vii,k. Mailed Oram extract in l'owdee. The Original Food-Drink for All Ages. I OTHERS ara IMITATIONS. MONEY LOANED on OMAHA REAL ESTATE Easy Re-Payment Terms Prompt, Courteous Service lHJ CONSERVATIVE SAVINGS & LOAN ASSOCIATION 1614 HARNEY STREET Attractive Rate 1 INTERtST NO COMMISSION