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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (March 15, 1918)
THE BEE: OMAHA, FRIDAY, MARCH 15, 1918. The Omaha Bee DAILY (MORNING) EVENING SUNDAY FOUNDED BY EDWARD ROSEWATER VICTOR ROSE WATER, EDITOR THE BEB PUBLISHING COMPANY. PROPRIETOR. Entered it Omaha potofflc at second-class matter. "" TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION Hr center. By Hell. .(Slly an Sunday par weak, ISa Tir rear. Kf.OO Daily without Sunday 10a " 4.00 Kfeulng tad Sunday " lOo " (.00 twilai enUwul Sunday.. la 4 00 Sunday Bee only " to 100 8od notloe of ananas of address or irregularltf la dellrsrf la Urn aba Be ClrculeUoa DKfmit. MEMBER OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS Tin associate Piw, or which To Bm ta a awabar, arelailwlf entitled to the bm for publteauoe of all am dlapatcties credited to t or not otherwise credited la tali peper, tad alas lha local nam published herein. All rlgote of pubuoatloa at our spade) dispatches ; an alio reserred. REMITTANCE Remit by draft, ei press or postal order. Only t and I -cent stamps , tikm (a mm ant of amall account Personal check, eieapt on rnaha and aaateta exchange, not ecoepted. ' OFFICES imaha The Bee Building. Chicago Permle'e flat Building. Omaha till N 8L New fork m Finn An. i miiwll Bluff-14 N. Mala Bt St. Ioule New B'k of Corameree. Lincoln Llula BUdlng. Washington 1811 O St. CORRESPONDENCE ' Address nmnnnleattma ntatlnt at aawt and adltorlal auttar ta . Otnaba Baa. Editorial DaparUMnt . FEBRUARY CIRCULATION 62,544 Daily Sunday, 54,619 iterate olrrulitton (or tba month, subscribed and mora to by Dwlght i Williams. ClrculaUoo Manager. Subaeriber taavfnf the city should bar Tba Baa mailed ta them. Addraaa changed aa of tea aa requested. I' Lyalty is a platform on which all should stand. The tlate makers may propose, but the vot ers will do the disposing. i If Trotsky can build op the army he destroyed he will indeed be a wizard. Fish or cut bait is the proposal laid down to .Holland, with no alternative of going ashore of . SzeeJitran ft again in a turmoil, so China will very likely have plenty of war at home for the next few weeks. -.. ' , ' s 1 Governor Neville, will relleie considerable sus pense If he will only make his announcement one I way or the other. At any rate, it is permissible to hope that . trains will again be en time after Old Man Win ter lifts his embargo. - What good will it do to arrest socialist lead ers for peddling anti-draft propaganda when committees in congress indulge in comment the wildest I. W. W. agitator would not emit? Tokio hears that the United States has seized Kamchatka, so the Japs must have dict con nection w(th German news agencies. Our gov ernment was trying t keep that move from get ting out, you know. , Because Des Moines pulled off that canton ment stunt gives it no license to think it can take the quartermaster's supply depot away from Omaha, too. Omaha will be on the job without depending on our United States senator who goes to sleep at the switch.' Mrs. Wilson's Indian ancestry stood her in good stead in making a choice of Indian names for the neW ships, but wonder, is how she came to overlook such musical "monikers" as Mem pliremagog, Moosemaguntlc, Nishnabotna, Wapsi pinicon, Oconomowoc, Muchikinock, Keokuk' or Kankakee. ; , ' . : ; Well, well,' well! Listen to the hyphenated World-Herald squealing again about The Bee's advertising. It is not the ads which The Bee prints that bothers the W. H., but the ads which the World-Herald, with all its persuasiveness and senatorial club, fails to get It's the stuck pig that squeal. ' "! Mobilize the Boys for Farm Work. Some talk is being heard of mobilizing the boys for farm work, but no definite steps have so far been taken to bring the matter to action. Some weeks ago The Bee made a suggestion that has been responded to most heartily by a group of interested business men. It was that arrange ments be made to send boys to the great imple ment depots in the city, there to become familiar with farm machinery and tools. The Omaha and Council Bluffs implement dealers, through their association, have agreed to assist in this work in every way and will see that all boys who come to them seeking knowledge along the line of farm work will get full Instruction. Accompanying this The Bee had another proposal, that team own ers invite boys to learn of the handling and driv ing of horses, how to harness and hitch the teams, how to feed and water them, care of barns and other knowledge of the kind that is indispen sable in connection with the farm. This prelimi nary training can be secured vat little or no ex pense and will provide knowledge that is valu able, even if the lad who gains it never sees a farm save from the roadside. While authorities give assurance that no shortage of farm labor now exists, preparation for the future should be made and one of the best methods of doing this is to train the boys to the end that they will be useful jf needed. ' A Word with You, Mr. Lovett This is addressed to you, Mr. Lovett, because you are the man nearest to Seer- tary McAdoo in the management and direction of our railroads who is particularly familiar with conditions in Omaha. According to advices from Washington, the railway administration is setting out upon a pro gram of economy through elimination of dupli cated effort chargeable to the policy of competi tion now abandoned by government control and operation. The first step is to be consolidation of local ticket offices where not obstructed by un expired leases. In this action the people will ac quiesce, though the convenience and accommoda tion of the traveling public must not be over looked. Here in Omaha a move in the direction of economy and efficiency even more to be desired is the merger of our two passenger stations, for whose separate operation by the government there is no longer any good excuse. All that has to be done to save a needless expenditure of many thousands of dollars is to order the crew of ticket sellers to move from the Burlington station into the Union station and let the Burlington trains enter and depart from the tracks .on the other side of the fence. A single passenger terminal for all roads con verging in Omaha is something we have long been advocating and urging. It is something we ought to have not next year, nor next month, but right now and nothing stands in the way of its achievement if you, Mr. Lovett, will only present the situation to Secretary McAdoo and have him say the word. "Standing Back of the President." Another proof of the support of the president by the majority party in congress is afforded by the holding up of the new draft law in the house at the behest of democrats. General Crowder, supported by the War department and the presi dent, has asked for the enactment of certain changes in the law to make it more effective. The bill has been passed by the senate, where its need wss Recognized, but in the house a group of demo crats has arrayed against it sufficient of strength to hold it, bsck indefinitely. Most of the arguments used against the meas ure are those originally presented against the selective draft law and mainly they are rehashed by the same nSen. 'Another and even flimsier pretext has been paraded, that of inequality of the service, the assertion being made that to levy the quota according to the number of men within class 1 instead of according 'to the pop ulation of the state is unfair. As class 1 is made up of men who best can be spared, their avail' ability for military service being determined by a full consideration of their other relations to society, and, as the service they are asked to per form is for the whole nation, thobjection seems absurd, It only can rest on the claim that 6ne( state will furnish a greater percentage of men than another, but how this can be twisted into any form of .injustice passes the understanding of anybody but a "patriotic," democrat, seeking to obstruct the administration the party so os tentatiously pretends to support. Ashton C Shallenberger of Nebraska Is one of the signers to the minority report on which the blockade' against the bill rests. He raises the point that agricultural labor will be drawn on too heavily. Compare this statement with the assurance from General Crowder that young men who are needed for farm operations have been put at the foot of the list and that none of them will be taken until his service in the field is of more importance than his service on the farm. Firm but Square Deal for Holland. Determination of the American and British governments to seize any Dutch ships available after next Monday unless the Netherlands gov ernment agrees to permit the use of such vessels within the war zone is warranted. Holland has tried to maintain a strict neutrality, but up to the present the Germans have been well served because of the trade possible across the Dutch border. Since the shipping situation became acute the Hollanders have practically withdrawn their vessels . from overseas trade. Throughout the last winter an effort has been under way to con clude negotiations for bringing these unemployed vessels into service. Even now proposals from the United States are under consideration at Am sterdam, the Dutch trying, to gain further con cessions. In fact, the attitude of the Dutch has almost become unneutral and It is this that has brought about the decision at Washington and London to take a firmer stand on the question. Holland's neutrality is entitled to the utmost re gard and will be respected so long as the Dutch do not rely on it to aid our enemies. Herein is applied the principle that made the Hitchcock resolution for an embargo on arms and munitions not only unneutral, but a direet service to Ger many. ' Dutch ships must be used for the bene fit of nations with whom the owners seek to keep up friendly relations and from whom they expect help. Mr. Bryan is now engaged on the greatest task of his career, that of establishing all the various "dry" factions into one cohesivei whole. It is pretty hard to form durable cement from water alone. . A Few Plain, Pungent Words What the United States Must Do to Win the War Los Angeles Times. Build, produce and go to it. That is what America must dol Fine phrases are very well in their place; but only men, supplies and ships win yicto ries. .Ships, food and fighters I The present war is not going to be won by conversation or by dancing and knitting; it will not be won through economic pressure or negotia tion. Germany has made itself dominant in central Europe through fighting; and as it looks now, it is by fighting that it is to be defeated. The mistake made by the allied nations before the war (the United States included) was to put so much stock in the efficacy of international arbitration that they failed to maintain thejir national defenses in a state equal to any; emergency. They did not look the grim god of war in the face. That mistake isnow being rectified at a ter rible price; but the rectification must be complete if democratic government and indi vidual freedom are to endure. The whole story of the wasted months is contained in the blunt statement that there have been too many variations on the 8reat theme of war aims. Unity of purpose has been effected by the allies through the establishment of a su preme war council;' coordination of effort has been secured in this country by confer ring voluntarily upon President Wilson, for the period of the war, autocratic power; but a proper co-ordination of the efforts of indi viduals and communities is still lacking. A vast amount of nonessential absorptions re main to be cast overboard by an aroused and patriotic people before our battleship, "U. S. A." is cleared for action, with plenty of gunners and plenty of grub I Battles are won by the men in the trenches, and not by auxiliary -associations operating far behind the lines not by pret ty girls with red badges; not by society functions, but by stern men with guns in their hands. In the case of the United States, the men must be taken from civilian occupations, equipped, given military training and trans ported 2,000 miles by land and 3,000 miles by sea before they can become actual com batants. Such a movement of troops and supplies has never before been attempted in the known history of the world. There is no lack of raw material for soldiers, ships or supplies; but there is a shortage of produc ers and products one that becomes daily more appalling. There are millions of idle acres in this country, millions of idle work ers in the Orient and millions of starving civilians in allied countries. Maudlin senti ment keeps the workers of the Orient off the idle acres in America; and a preventable shortage of ships causes a million tons of produce to go to waste in America while production of war supplies is lessened in the allied countries because their workers are weakened from lack of food. ' Patriotic impulses are sometimes wrong ly directed. The winning of the war de pends upon -the overwhelming numbers of fighters and producers, not upon the num bers of nurses and chaplains. Battles are not won by fancy dress balls, by afternoon teas, by horses and dogs parading up and down Broadway or by midnight revelries. Chaplains are necessary; nurses are neces sary; war benefits may be commendable; frolics are all right; but none of these will win the war. We may as well face that un deniable fact. There is a growing discontent in England and France over the increasing call upon them for vessels to transport American men and supplies. We should be ashamed of it. The German submarines are relentless in their activity. During the last year their toll of tonnage was greater than new con struction in the allied countries. As the number of vessels afloat in the trans-Atlantic service is increased by the shipment of American troops and supplies, we must be prepared to meet an increased submarine toll. Reports from the shipyards of the country reveal, however, that the increase in shipbuilding has not materialized to the degree expected by reason of an almost un believable apathy displayed by the workers in the shipyards, president Wilson has pointed out that this world conflict is fought in the interest of the workers; that making the world safe for democracy means making it safe for the man who toils. But the work ers have not responded as a body to this ap peal. It is depressing to read that the same number of workers produced a ship of given dimensions in one-half the time three years ago that is reauired for its construction now. For every workman who drives a nail slackly in an American shipyard the son of an American mother will die a violent death "somewhere in France." Delay in the con struction of ships means delay in winning the war. But the American public is not yet keyed up to the pitch where it will sternly demand a greater effort on the part of the workers as a patriotic duty, under pains and penalties for slacking. The pulse of the country is throbbing with patriotic desire; but for every shot that actually hits, whole broadsides are going astray. Hundreds of persons are busy giv ing counsel who should be awaiting advice For every practical worker there are 100 tea- pourers, benefit ticket sellers, dancers, sing ers and theorists; and seldom in the history ot the world has there been such an example of enerirv misaoolied. There is so much money in circulation that it creates false illusions of wealth: the public fails to realize that we are mortgaging our future and that every obligation must be repaid with added interest at a time when war prices and war wages will not prevail. The wealthy have- cut out many of their luxuries; but the waste going into nonessentials is greater than ever before because the higher wages received by the working classes impel them towards the very luxuries eschewed by the rich. If this impulse remains unchecked it will lead to widespread misery. Democracy in America has not yet struck its gait. Hundreds of thousands are mak ing sacrifices for nonessentials. Lloyd George declared in one of his patriotic addresses that the present war came about, with its untold tragic effect, because former administrations did not dare to tell the British public the truth. They saw the power -of the German army growing monthly more menacing to the peace of Europe and they failed to go frankly before the people with a budget suf ficiently large to enable Great Britain to meet it on equal terms whenever sufficient provocation should be offered., Plain speaking' and hard fighting are es sentials to military success. A Liberty army composed of more than 1,000,000 young men is eager and waiting to do its part in the fighting, and we owe it alike to them and to ourselves that there shall be no pandering to hysterical jmpulses at home. Millions of dollars were misapplied in this country last year because patriotic 'benefits and auxiliary war activities were not properly scrutinized. The people of, the United States have enough money, enough courage and enough energy to win this war for democracy only on con dition that they co-ordinate their energies and eliminate waste. Let us get down to business I More shipbuilding, more troop trains, more food production, less self-delusion, less play-at-working, less making a festivity of -war, less misdirection, hysteria, piffling and overlapping! Less waiting, less red tape, less fussing around) more get-there I Every One Must Work in Jersey Man Must Hunt the Job or the Job Will Hunt Him New Jersey's anti-loafing law went into effect by proclamation of Governor Edge. It affects every able-bodied male between the ages of 18 and SO, swatting the peripatetic proletariat as well as the millionaire. "Millionaries who flatter themselves," says Governor Edge, in effect, "that they can evade the law by sitting in the lap of luxury are going to make a (great mistake. If you live in Jersey you've got to work." Any one who insists upon indulging a predilection for judicious inactivity will find himself face to face with a penalty of $100 fine or three months in jail, or both. And the governor places a heayy emphasis on the "OR BOTH.'' No one can hope to evade the law by the "elusive job" plea. A man who can t locate work will have lyork located for him, and it will be the sort of toil best suited to his talents. The governor purposes to administer the law with intelligence. . Where employment is provided by the state, it will in all cases be honorable. In some instances it will be light, in others it may involve perspiration. But in any case it will be a rustle between the governor and the devil. With Satan finding some mischief and the governor find ing work for -idle hands o do, the odds seem to be slightly in favor of the governor. In his proclamation Governor Edge said: "In its wisdom the legislature has or dained that following the issuance of this proclamation it shall be the duty of the com missioner of labor to prepare and publish such rules and regulations governing the as signment of persons to work as will in sure equality of treatment and take into ac count age, physical condition and any other circumstances of the individual. "The selective service principle should prevail .as in the making of our military forces. In this task we are drafting for the industrial army.- There are kinds of work too severe, in a physical sense, for the so ciety idler, who may, however, be com petent to handle tasks which would be im possible for slackers of the hobo type. "Sound judgment must be employed in our experiment to rid the human hive of its drones, and I call upon the Labor department of this state to employ all of its available re sources, including the Federal-State-Municipal Employment bureaus in providing machinery to obtain the kind of work suit able for specific cases. "I call attention of sheriffs, mayors and heads of police departments in all municipali ties to the necessity of maintaining sharp vigilance and a keen eye for these workless individuals whose lack of ambition and fond ness for idleness -constitute not -merely a financial burden to every community, but also a genuine menace to the welfare of the nation's manhood under arms and 4heir safety on the battle frdnt. "Executives of municipalities of 10,000 population and over are urged to have their police departments compile a list of all habitual idlers in the community, to the end that they may be individually warned of the penalty and that the names of those profess ing willingness to work may be promptly certified to the State Labor department as available for employment." By making the law "something more than a temporary sensation," the governor declares it will "curb vagrancy, uselessness, mendicancy, immorality and crime." Nfw York World. , People and Events One of the first non-essential to give up the ghost to war is counterfeiting. ' New York reports the business flat and unprofit able. By a mere executive edict the island of Oahii. one of the Hawaiian group, is made "dry." Oahu is aurrounded by water" that is useless as a chaser. The taxing power of Missouri touched off the mine under tax dodgers and lifted assessment valuations from $1,700,000,000 to $3,800,000,000. The 6tate tax commission snread the uplift over all the show-mes, cleverly blocking attacks on the discrimina-, tion line. 2EW ' One Year Ago Today lit the War. British mad great drive against Bapaume, France. , , , Russian revolutionary movement, which had begun with food rlota and strikes, culminated In the abdication of Czar Nicholas. . ' The Day We Celebrate. Robert C. Carter, building con ' tractor, born 1860. Beryl F. Carroll, former governor of Iowa, born in Davia county, Iowa, 68 years ago. 1 Rt Rev. John P. Farrelly, Catholic bishop of Cleveland, born at Memphis, Tenn., 62 year ago. Edward Payson Weston, pedestrian, born at Providence, R, I, 70 years ago. Hits Day in History. 1800 Jamee Henry Hackett, the ' father of comedy on the American atage. born in New York City. Died "at Jamaica, I I., December 28, 1871. ,i 1865 General Sherman left Fayet ' tevllle, N. C and crossed th Cape -Fear river for Goldsboro. - 1888 General Boulanger waa dis- missed from actlva service in the French army for visiting Paris with ; out leave. t - 1890 President Harrison Issued a proclamation warning persona aglnst " ntering Bering Sea for the purpose ; it unlawfully killing fur-bearing anl jnals. 18S8 Bir Henry Bessemer, Inventor of Bessemer steel, died in London. Bn JaauaMT 19. 1811 Jw. . ... ... " : J ust SO Years Ago Today Mike Gaine and J. D. Meagher leave for St. Paul 'to put the packing house of Fowler Brother in that place on a paying order. Leroy Hough, George Brown, W. B. Wallwork, Jim Doud, Doc. Wea blubee, Al. Powell. J. D. Dadeaman and some more men have formed the Labor in Vain society, with Leroy Hough as president The atat convention of republican club met In th Exposition hall and was called to order by Ralph Breck enridge. Officer E. C. Rowden spent the greater part of the day in endeavoring to prevent the fast driving so reck lessly indulged in on Sixteenth street. He claims to have stopped no less than 100 teams-who were driving dangerously fast. Mr. and Mrs. J.,H. Lacey cele brated their 40th wedding anni-versary. The Business Men's club held a meeting at the office of C. E, Mayn. Whittled to a Point Washington Post: Comparisons of profiteers to Judaa are hardly fair, as the latter eventually developed symp tom of remorse and bumped off. Baltimore American: She who buys an Easter bonnet renders a pa triotic aervtce to th nation in helping to keep trade active, aa well aa min istering greatly to her own satisfac tion. Mlnneapotia Tribune: TJ. S. Grant called upon Robert B. Lee in camp the other day. These two descendants of two famous American entered the army from civil life. Yet the kaiser still think ha can whip an army com posed ot men of that type. New York World: When Senator Reed says that only 86 ships Instead of 480 were released from "all Amer ican porta" because ot or during heat less Mondays be Is talking to a Mis sourlan that cannot be shown. But a certain Atlantio port know better. It saw th ships! Brooklyn Eagle: "The German sword 1 our best protection" i a de lighful kaiserlsm. Jt'a nonsense, of course. Th sword which doesn't help at all went with honor and chivalry. The U-boat, the air bomb, th gaa bomb and the treaty crap of paper have no such association. Louisville Courier-Journal: Th bolshevlki new talk of getting up a "holy war" against the Teutons, Into whose hand they hav betrayed Rus sia. The bolshevlki reject religion, but will nnd a use for it if they can make somebody light their battles for I them in the nam (jj3f "Over There it American soldiers at the front are giving the natives the - gumchewing habit It takes about 15 minutes for the sound of heavy gunfire in France to travel to Englind. Italy haa imposed a government tax on all restaurant ' and cafe bills amounting to more than !0 cents. Every Swiss adult is liable to mili tary service. In the event of a man being physically un.1t to serve with the colors he la compelled to pay a small sum annually to exempt him from service, but in time of war he may be called upon to serve in such capacities aa he maybe able to All. Helslngfors. the capital of Finland, is amongst the youngest of the Eu ropean capitals, for it Is but little over 100 years since Czar Alexander I, shortly after the annexation of the Grand Duchy by Russia, transferred the capital thither from Abo, which was, in his opinion, too near Sweden. Siberia, the immense territory upon which the Germans are believed to have set their eyes, comprises a much larger area than the United States. Many persons have considered the country as a glacial desert, and a place only for the punishment of Rus. sian offenders. This la true of the northern part of the tezttory, but the largest part of Siberia Ta a land with immense commercial prospects. Gold snH silver mine, almairt Inaxh&uatible. jare there. The soil of a large part lot the province possesses marvelous jprgductiSJ Twice Told Tales ' A Needed Lesson. It doesn't pay to take it for granted that the native Londoner haa no sense of humor, aa one American officer of the newly organized engineers found out. This man went into a barber shop for a shave and fell to bragging about the United States of America, "Why in America," he declared, "we all specialize. You should stick to one thing and master It com pletely." v The barber, who meanwhll had been lathering hia customer's face, nodded assent but said nothing. He then left the American and sat down to enjoy hla newspaper. "Why don't you shave me?" In quired the American. "Oh, we only lather here," coolly replied the barber. "You must go next door to be shaved." Minneap olis Journal. i Better Than Cash. . "Hello! I this Smith's coal of fice?" "Yea" . "I've only got coal enough in my cellar to last till tomorrow " That'a good! What'U you take for It?" Boston Transc-'-t. , Made a Hit. "Did Howler convince hla audience by that political speech he made?" "I should say he did! Why? every man who was there went away deter mined to vote for the opposition candidate." Richmond .Timeq-Dla- west Nebraska Banks and Liberty Loan. Omaha, March 12. To the Editor of The Bee: Notice by Associated Press report that Secretary McAdoo is complaining of some of the banks not doing their share. I thought perhaps you might be interested in having the enclosed tabulation, which will give you an idea et what the bank In the different counties in the state of Ne braska have done. For instance, take Box Butte county. Its quota of the second Liberty bonds was $234,300 and the total amount subscribed in the county waa 8134, 900, or 67 per cent of the cuota. At this time the five banks In the county are holding 827,100 of the first and second isBuea of bonds, or 26 per cent of the amount subscribed. The figures will also give you the amount of the quota and the amount subscribed by each of the 14 districts under which we have divided the state. In this yon will find that In District No. 12, consisting of Cass, Ne maha, Otoe and Richardson counties, the quota was $1,525,800 and the amount subscribed in the four coun ties was $1,801,950, or 119 per cent of their quota, and that today the banks hold $432,950 of the first and second issue of bonds, or 24 per cent of the amount subscribed. This re port being from 60 out of 68 banks in that district. E. F. FOLDA, Secretary Liberty Loan Committee. Round L'p the Loafers. Omaha, March 11. To the Editor of The Bee: I note a move to mobilize boys for work to aid In get ting the kaiser, and the growing dis position of many employers to hire women at less money so that the men will be free to go to war has been noted and appreciated by patriotic citizens. I write to suggest that some of th notorious loafers of this city, and I presume there are some else where, be mobilized and made to do their bit. Why not round up the pool hall hounds and see what can be done in their cases? I have In mind a young fellow who is married to an indus trious woman who works every day and supports the alleged man, whose sole occupation seems to be to hang around the pool halls and cigar stores and play poker. The wife pays the room rent and furnishes the so-called man his meals. I presume this de lectable animal is claiming exemption on the ground that he has a depend ent wife. I think there is something radically wrong when the average citizen has to hit the ball to get by and such brutes as this are allowed to mooch their worthless lives at the expense of society. Such as he should be rounded up and be made to con tribute to the burden of the war. AMERICUS. Liquor and the Church. Omaha, March 12. To the Editor of The Bee: It is with Interest I note the words spoken by Rev. Patrick J. Judge. This is not very encouraging to me, as I have not touched a drop of liquor since I voted against 'the liq uor interests. I admit that I used to come home quite frequently under the influence of whisky and wine. When Jesus turned water into wine It was unfermented wine. The Bible says: ' "Wine is a mocker, etrong drink Is raging and whoever is de ceived thereby Is not wise." From experience I do not think intoxicating liquor should be allowed inside the church doors. I can see now what the "Reformation" was for, it was to reform and purify- the church and stop abuses and to recognize Jesus Christ only as the actual head of the church. WILLIAM THOMPSON. LAUGHING GAS. "What's a tip, pop?" "Tou've heard, haven't you, my ion, of parting a fool from hia money?" "Tea. pop." "Well, a tip la what they So It with." Baltimore American. Patience Peggy la an obedient girl. Patrice What now? "Someone told heY to watch her atep anfl ahe'a put her wrlat watch on her ankle." Yonkera Stateaman. ' "I see a farmer ordered an oyater atew the ether day and then tossed a 11,000 Mil on the counter." ''Ha merely wanted to show 'em that he had the price of a square meal." Loulavllla Courier-Journal. "Don't you think Bllklna waa rude ts ex cuse himself Immediately after our dinner?" "Poaslbly; but ha had an engagement to eat another one 11 mlnutea later." Life. Caller It seems wonderful that Japanese dentists can take out teetb with their fin gers. Hostess' Little Daughter Mamma can take out hers with her fingers, every one of them. Boaton Transcript. It would be hard to find a more absent minded man than the dentist who said, soothingly, as he applied a tool to his auto mobile, under which he lay: "Now this is going to hurt just a little." Harper's Magaslne. 1 "High allmonlo," caroled tha children. "I don't like that song," declared Flub, dub. "It reminds me ot a very unpleasant ,j,aaaH I Tells How to Stop a ;: Bad Cough ' Snrprfslng result from thi hom ' ' aaade agrrup. Easily prepared , - If you hav a severe eonpb. or chest cold aocompamV w'th soreness, threat tickle, hoarseness, or difBcul breathin?, or if your child wakes up during tha night with erouo and you an quick lelp, just try this pleasant tasting lome-made cough remedy. Any drujr cist can supply you with Z ounces of IMnex (60 cents worth). Pour tins Into a pint bottle and fill ihe bottle with plain GTanulatel ugar syrup. Thus prepared, yon have a pint f really re markable eouft'u remed one that oan be depended upon to give quick and lasfe ins relie at all tines. You can ieel t' is take hold of a couch' In a way that means busi iess. It) loosens and raises the phlegm, stops throat tickle and soothes and heals the irritated membrane that line the throat and bronchial tube with such promptness, ease and certainty that it ia really astonishing. Pines is a special and highly concen trated compound of genuine Norway pine extract, and is noted for it speed in overcoming severe coughs, throat and chest colds. Its million of enthusiasts users have made it famous the world pver. ' There are many worthless imitations of this noted mixture. To avoid disap pointment, ask for ,"2 ounces of Pinex" with full directions and don't accept anything else. A guarantee of absolute satisfaction or money promptly refunded, goes with this preparation. Jh Pinex Co, ft, Wayne, Zn episode In my life." Louisville Courier. Journal. Mistress I am not Quite satisfied wits your references. Maid Neither am I, but they are tha be I could get. New Tork Olobe. A LIFE SUBLIME. (Tribute to Thomas A. Edison.) Oh roaster piece of mortal man, A world'a wtthln his brain; Tha golden gems of genius art Hla noble thoughts contain. He stands for freedom's sacred cause, With fearless brain and heart; He battles for democracy. With all his peerless art. He reaps from wisdom's lofty heights; His wisdom shines supreme; 'Twill see the fall of tyranny. And welcome freedom's dream. Oh, honor him with loyal hearts. And praise where praise Is due; Columbia's son and mortal star Our Edison so true. All ages boast of mighty men, Each land from sea to sea; But through the mystlo span of time, No equal yet haa he. He marks the destiny of things, While his Inventions tell; This world will be a paradise, Where future men may dwell. Lucas, S. D. JEWELL ELLISON. beautiful fflatcV ess singing wiw y the Mason r Hamlin is due to the High tension ot- Its strings a tension which would destroy the sounding-board arch m any ocner piano. Musto show you Highest Priced Highest Praised A. Hospe Co. 1513 Douglas St NUXATEDIRON U "Say Doctor Thia I i Prescription Works Like Magic" 1M? Physician Says Nutated Iron Quick ly Puts Astonishing Strength and Energy into tha Veins of Man and Brings Rosea to tha Cheeks of Nervous, Run-Down Woman. X A T E D V Aik the first hundred strong, healthy peo- I- pla you meet to wbat they owe their etrenitn and see how many reply "Nuxated Iron. Dr. Jamas Flrancia SuUlran, tor 1 merly Physician ot Bellerae Hospital, (Out- Rdoor Dept.) New Tork. and tha West ebeiter County Hospital, saya: 'Thou aandi of people suffer from Iron de- flcleocy. but do not snow what to take. mj There is nothing Ilka organla iron Nui- ated Iron to Quickly enrich the blood, make beautiful, healthy woman, and Natrons, risoroua Iron men. To make abso lutely sure that my patients gat rsaK organic Iron and not soms form of tas matillts nrletv. I always nreacrlbs Nux- ' Ir. n In Its original packages. Nut tad Iron will Increase the strength and endurance of weak, nenous run-down folks In 10 days' time in many lnetancee." ... Note: Nuxated Iron recommended by Dr. Sttl tiran can be obtained from any good druggist. with or without a pbrtlolan's prescription or sn Absolute manufacturers' guarantee of aueoees or money rr-funnefl. . . We are competent to arrange and conduct funerals character ized by quiet grandeur. We render efficient service and charge con sistently for it. . N. P. SWANSON Funeral Parlor, (Established 1S8S) 17th and Cuming Sts. Tel. Douglas 1060. DONT 1H ISTlPln!j Musterole Works Easier, Quicker f and Without the Blister There' no sense in mixing a mess of ! mustard, flour and water when you can easily relieve pain, soreness or stiffness with a little dean, white Musterole. Musterole is made of pure oil of mus tard and other helpful ingredients, com bined in the form of the present white ointment It takes the place of out-of-date mustard plasters, and will not blister Musterole usually gives prompt relief from sore . throat; bronchitis, tonsiutis, croup, stiff neck, asthma, neuralgia, head-, ache, congestion, pleurisy, rheumatism, lumbago, pains and aches of the back or Joints, sprains, core muscles, bruises, chil blains, frosted feet, colds of the chesj (it often prevents pneumonia). 30c ana 60c jars; hospital size $150. THE SCHOOL FOR OMAHA GIRLS The National School . of ' Domestic Art and Science , Washington, D. C. ' Departments of Domestic Art, Science tod Home Economics. Preparatory Department. a substitute for High SchooL Service Courses, Including work in Telegraphy, Wireless, First Aid, Red Cross and Secretarial studies. Strong Musical Faculty. Outdoor Athletics on 11-acre campus. Brownell Hall Credits Accepted. Total expenses, One Thousand Dollars any department Eight model fireproof buildings, a few vacancies for 1918-19. i Interesting Year Book Upon Request. Address REGISTRAR, 2650 Wisconsin Ave. N. W., Wash, D. C