THE BEE: OMAHA, WEDNESDAY. MARCH 6, 1918. The Omaha Bee DAILY (MORNING) EVENING SUNDAY FOUNDED BY EDWARD R OSWATER VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOB THE BlJtHJBUSHINO COMPANY. PKOPsUrTOBT Eatcrsd at Omaha pottotfiM a soosd-lss matter. TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION """ B CM. tf tUlL Ui1f wiibont BmUj " iw 2 J Krauts so Sunday... HfMijia itl a. .. ia 4. Stiodsr Bs ! j. " fa ' tot See noow at shuts f sMjsss at brtnlults I MUM la Os-hS b Orou ttt Pn-fart. . MEMBER OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS sniiUsd KiWwl niMuxtioa K til Dm dlmatefan credited u, .t or not otMnria etrfludja this Piw ud i"&T- awt cuMiitMd bents. AJI nstou c( neMicstKsi at tor otoi- tcli n si isssrfsl REMITTANCE Bfmtt Dr 6nK rTW m ralil er. Onl l-it stl tss txrucot M4U MooanttFmoMi oh, nut a Osub b4 casMra tvhknn. sot tobtUn. ! OFFICES Knits 0mh-2SU M tt Nt f ors-2M Fifth Aw. CouU B!uT-U . IMS M. . touts-- B'i COSUMICS. Ltneola-Littl ButkUss. Wssblflsto 111 0 Bt , CORRESPONDENCE ' AMrm mamonfcstioos isuuns u am m4 aAtorlal smUsi to Onus Bw, Iditorl- DsMitnmH. FEBRUARY CIRCULATION , 62,544 Daily-Sunday, 54,619 Annus enwJsth IM tut Booth. sataerlM tad swots to M OwUM Will.tau. ClwulUlaa sow. SobscrflMrs Uavlnf tha elty abaoM Tha Baa auJM la than. AaaVaaa caaaiaa aa oft aa raaaaataa. One consolation is within reach of Russians who think. Matters could not be worse for them. The advance agent of that gigantic German offensive on the west front must have overdone his job. 1 Whatever goes up must come down, but the egg men evidently did not believe this applied to them. , Of course, Mr. Heney did not intend to re flect on General Plummet, Jbut merely to soft soap him. " Though, one year of his second term is gone, there still remain three more years to get , us out of war. According to the political weather chart, the Ed P. Smith mayoralty boomlet does not as yet seem to have won the favor of the .senator or his hyphenated newspaper. -- --- i One effect of the German advance into Rus- sia Has been to oring to ngnt t lot ox names 01 S. J . I I 1 . t. TL tAurni tifvur narn ni in rnrse nam uciorc. lie war is great incentive to the study of geog Austria is reported to bt securing rich loot from Ukrainian towns, with which a peace treaty recently was negotiated. Does ijot this make clear the value of an agreement with a Teutonic .combination?;..'-;;...' ''.'i .... s .- r...: . . - Packers are pleading with the food adminis trator to help them out on a lot of stuff they have in storage and on which the selling price Was gone down. The ultimate consumer will watch the result closely. " t Our amiable hyphenated contemporary just cannot understand how the tenator'i serpentine .record can be so woefully misunderstood when it is busy every day trying to straighten it out with all the modern camouflage, utensils, r The Lincoln Journal suggests that doing away with salary would solve most of the evils of the commission forrri of city government. Holy stnokel Is the profession of politics to be put in the same class as that of philanthropy! The choice of Mr. Lovett to be chief assist ant to Uncle Sam in running the railroads is an excellent one. Besides that, he is t good Texas democrat and one of the few big railroad presi dents who supported , President Wilson. force election. . . . .,.- Bolshevik! Give Up Propaganda. How utterly abjtct and humiliating ,the sur render of the bolshevik! to the kaiser is disclosed by further details of contents of the peace agree ment just concluded at Brest-Lltovsk, It is now stated that one of the earliest articles in the main treaty provides that' neither party shall carry on any agitation or other interference with the internal affairs of the other. .Thus ,the rep resentatives of the Russian proletariat abandon the dearest of their prerogatives, that of active propaganda. The windjammers of Petrograd, whose flow of words ran on and on, a flood de signed to overwhelm the hated capitalist of every race, and who were going to persuade the peas ants and workmen of Germany and Austria to join them in establishing an economic millenium, are deprived by their own action of that privi lege. The first class conscious Russian who mounts a soapbox in the new German territory Its il 4 -J to 6pout against tne oourgeoisie win snortiy una himself standing against a wall, facing a firing squad. Germany wastes little tine in dealing with these. But American socialists, headed by Vic tor Berger and Adolph Germer, atill cling to the St. Louis declaration, which hoi is that kind words will unite the workers and more than natch the mailed fist of Prussian militarism. A Free Field and Fair Race. It is already evident that Omaha's third elec tion under the commission plan of city govern ment is to show up a list of entries on the po litical race track about as large, and perhaps larger, than the preceding contests. The theory of the commission plan with its nonpartisan ballot and elimination primary is to offer a free field to anybody and everybody who feels himself competent to pull down a $4,500 salary-and can persuade 100 of his fellow citizens to attach their signatures to his petition. Under these conditions we are bound to have a heterogeneous mass of primary candidates that will have to be sifted out for the final choice in the election. It will devolve upon the voters tod sidetrack the incompetents and the lightweights and to reject those with shady records. If it is a fair race illumined by the full light of publicity on the relative claims and merits and demerits of the candidates no one can question the re sult as reflecting the real desires of the people. The Bee is not setting up candidates, but for all concerned it repeats its warning that the city hall, no more than thecourt house, is a proper place for corrupt political profiteers. Landsdowne Versus Henderson. Lord Landsdowne, who re:ently startled the world and shocked his Tory associates into apol ogy for him, has again addressed himself to the public on the subject of peace. He sees in Chancellor von Hertling'g late statement to the Reichstag committee an open way to negotiations and expresses a timid hope that the invitation to a conference may be accepted. - Landsdowne, however, falls into the error that has charac terized the course of his class from the begin ning. He interprets the suggestion of the Ger man chancellor, and probably is correct, not to mean a formal peace conference of the powers, but a quiet gathering of a few influential citizens, who confidentially will talk over the situation and arrange preliminary" terms to be presented to a duly organized body of accredited delegates. And this is just what '.be people do not want Arthur Henderson, who is secretary of the labor party for Great Britain, opening the cam paign for a new election, states the case for the ther side very fairly. He announces as fore most among the aims of the group he speaks for the abolition of secret diplomacy. Treaties must be openly negotiated and must never con travene the fundamentals on which' his proposed league of nations rests. It will be the part of wisdom for Lord Landsdowne and those uf his mind to give heed to "what Henderson says. He represents a rising principle in politics, a more potent democracy, while the advocates of. the old-fashioned Tory notions are dwindling in num bers and influence. ,"' ' - Whether, all of the program outlined by Hen derson in his address is attainable, or even de sirable, need not now be debated. The fact Mat the labor party , in Great Britain Is growing in numbers and power through its devotion to new ideas resting on world-old ideals, fint f which is that treaties must be made for the peo ple and not for the rulers, is an indication of the turn of sentiment. Blood and treasure Is being expended to make the world safe for democracy and not to perpetuate class distinctions. Calla Ex-Famera Back to Land. ' Secretary Houston has apooached the farm labor problem from one angle that seems prac tical in all its aspects. He suggests that men who have moved to town from the farm retrace their steps and help raise a crop to win the war. Here are hie words: ? "If soldiers are willing to serve in the trenches and risk their lives many civilians can well afford to spare a part of their time to serve in the furrows and in the harvest fields. In many towns and cities there are men who have v , had farming experience, who are able-bodied and who would doubtless be willing to serve the nation in the field of agriculture at this time. Especially for the seasonal strains of planting, cultivating and harvesting it will not be too much to ask such men to aid the farm ers in the necessary undertaking of maintain ing and, if possible, supplementing the food supply in order to feed the armies and to sus tain the civilian population behind them." v. Nebraska has its quota of these men, who are busy at cne thing or another in town, but who well can afford to give a little time to the big duty of helping out on 'the farm this summer and maybe' next.". -.: ' " Chicago ts some town, but' is going to have its hands full for the next few days, with a Billy Sunday revival a local option fight and the movement to suppress crime all going at one KIIU IMC MlllC UillC. IV MIKJT VC II1G UC interlocking, but, even so, they make up a con siderable program, even for Chicago. . Socialists are now complaining that the Allies did not support Ierensky. Admitting that they did not, how much help did he get from the reds, who denounced him as a representative of the bourgeoisie and a capitalist in disguise, while hailing Trotzky and Lenine as the saviors of the proletariat? Speculation as to where Hindenburg proposes, to stri&; if he strikes at all, does little harm nor any good. It is not probable the Germans will widely advertise their purpose in advance, so we will only know exactly when they start what spot they have picked as most favorable. German Of ficials Condemn Germany The Invasion of Belgium in the Light of History Prof. O. C. Fiske, Wisconsin University. Germany's violation of the neutrality of Belgium has been called a crime against civilization. Are there cold facts to prove this? A neutralized state is one that has been guaranteed freedom from invasion upon con dition that it wage no war beyond its bor ders. Switzerland, Luxemburg, and Belgium are such states. . Belgium was created a neutralized nation in 1839 by a treaty signed by Great Britain, France, Russia, Prussia, Austria. They agreed that Belgium' should form an inde pendent and perpetually neutral state, and bound themselves to interfere for the de fense of Belgium against any power at tempting to invade Belgian territory. Bel gium, in its turn was pledged to observe neutrality towards all other states. This treaty was reaffirmed in 1870 and respected in the Franco-Prussian war. , But Belgium, like every other neutral state, had also the protection of The Hague convention of 1907. The United States as well as all the other great powers signed that convention. The Hague convention says that the territory of neutral powers shall not be invaded; that troops or supplies of bel ligerents shall not move across it; and that if a foreign power invades a neutralized country, the neutral country has the right and duty to resist. Thus doubly protected Belgium and Lux emburg had every reason to expect that like Switzerland their neutrality would be re spected by all belligerents. Nevertheless on August 2, 1914, Belgium received an ultimatum from Germany de manding the right to pass troops through Belgian territory. It promised at the con clusion of peace to restore the property and the independence of the Belgian kingdom in full. If Belgium resisted. Germany would consider it an enemy. As an enemy, Ger many declared that it could not guarantee the independence of Belgium thereafter. In accordance with the treaty of 1849 and of The Hague convention, this brutal ulti matum forced an industrious and absolutely innocent people into war. For suppose that Belgium had agreed to Germany's proposal Belgium would then have forfeited all right to be treated as a neutral and independent nation by Great Britain and France. If they were victorious in the war, they would have been justified in destroying its independence. Also, what guarantees would the Belgians have had that a victorious Germany after ruthlessly breaking one agreement would keep another? The determination to main tain her independence as well as regard for her honor as a nation inevitably led Belgium to refuse the German demand. Germany made no charges against the loyalty of Belgium. On the contrary the German Foreign Minister von Jagow, when interviewed on the morning of August 4, 1914, by the Belgian ambassador, said: "Germany has nothing with which to re proach Belgium, and the attitude of Belgium has always been perfectly correct" On the same afternoon in his famous speech before the Reichstag, von Bethmann Hollweg, the German chancellor, said: "We are in a state of necessity and ne cessity knows no law So we were com pelled to override the just protest of the Lux emburg and Belgian governments." Out of the mouths of its two highest offi cials Germany thus condemns itself. There is not a shred of evidence that France intended to invade Belgium. When asked by Great Britain on July 31, 1914, France on the same day replied that she in tended to respect the neutrality of Belgium, and so informed the Belgian government. Great Britain had told the Belgian gov ernment asearly as April 7, 1913, that it would not invade Belgium except to defend its neutrality, never first v What about Germany? When asked by Great Britain on July 31. 1914, Germany re fused to make any promise. France, Belgium, and Great Britain have a clean slate. Germany is a self-confessed criminal in the court of civilization. Two months later Germany announced that she had found in the Belgian war office records of a proposed plan by which Eng land was to pass through Belgium to attack Germany. She did not point out that these same documents showed that the plan was to be carried out only in case Germany in vaded Belgium. Neither did it explain that King Albert had told her of this plan when it was made several years before the war be gan. Germany's attempt to excuse her gross violation of Belgium's neutrality is both clumsy and dishonest. Belgium and Great Britain were more than Justified in their suspicions because of the German strategic railways built for five years before the war, which threatened the eastern frontiers of Belgium like the tentacles of an octopus But what has the crime against Belgium to do with our entrance into the war? Ger many's violation of Belgium is a menace to the Monroe doctrone. Will a victorious Ger many that violated Belgium regard the rights of the smalt nations in Central and South America? In the violation of Belgium's neutrality we Americans see a concrete and bitter proof of just what the realization of the ideas of German military autocracy means to the world and means to us. The German gov ernment asserts that necessity knows no law, that might makes right, that a solemn con tract is a "scrap of paper." Such ideas are a menace to every nation in Christendom. Bolshevist Test of Socialism Doctrine of Marx in Practice a World Object Lesson - (Minneapolis Journal.) In the bloody and riven laboratory of Russia the doctrines of radical socialism are being tried out. Never before have they been fmt to the test on such a scale. And their ruitage of anarchy, to be followed as inevit ably by despotism, is already bitter in the mouths of the Russian ; peoples. 'Radical socialism the sort that Marx proclaimed and the bolsheviki are striving to impose maintains thaf the only produc tive worker is the man who works with his muscles. Tolstoy declared .that all brain workers are social parasites. Socialism de mands a revolution in which the muscle workers,! the proletariat, shall , overthrow other classes and dominate society and gov ernment. Socialism, theref6re, plans the au tocracy of the proletariat. It is a form of autocracy. , , r , c; This is precisely the doctrine which the bolsheviki nave endeavored to carry out, with results already disastrous, and with an even bloodier and more fearful sequel im pending. They rail at the "bourgeoisie," at the intellectuals, at all who work with brains. They insist that their class, and their class alone, shall rule. They have set up their own autocracy in place of the czaristic autocracy that fell They dissolved the Constituent Assembly, elected by the representatives of all the Rus sian peoples, because they could not con trol it. They set up in its place the Soviets, which are strictly of and by the proletariat They made war on the Rada, elected by the people of Little Russia, and are now striving to overthrow the people of the Ukraine, which the Rada set up. They attacked the new government of Finland, and are at war with the Cossacks of the Don, striving to establish their own autocracy everywhere. Manual labor is noble, but it cannot rule both itself and other labor. Unless intelli gence abdicates, ignorance cannot wield the social scepter. The very fact of leadership connotes brain work. Even the proletariat must have its leaders, must choose those of mental superiority, even though such choice denies the whole theory of radical socialism. The natural result follows, as it has fol lowed, and is following in the rule of the bol sheviki The demagogue comes into his own. He has the brain of a leader, but not the conscience. He shouts all the catch words of the cult, and shouts them louder and more persuasively than those who really believe in them. He seizes the power and wields it un til another who is wilier and more persuasive, takes it from him. ... v Thus out of the reek of anarchy climbs a new despotism. The struggle to make the muscle working class supreme over all others results inevitably in creating an unscrupulous demagoguism which seizes despotic power. Bolshevism has brought forth its first fruits anarchy. And it will yet bring forth that which follows anarchy under such con ditionsdespotism, whether native or Prus sian. . . .; , Class rule is possible only when the ruling class is superior in intelligence. That is bad enough. But class rule founded on ignorance and sentimentalism, carries within it the germs of its own destruction. Radical socialism is a theory so contra dictory of the basic principles of human so ciety that, when put to the test, it inevitably destroys itself. Bolshevism is now running its feverish and fitful course.. It should be an object lesson to the democratic world of the dangers of putting the theories of social ism into practice. : i y . -y. A Fine Example oj . Loyalty To overcome a crisis in the transporta tion situation of the country A. O. Whar ton, head ' of the railway employes' branch of the American Federation of Labor, rep resenting 300,000 workmen, has1 agreed with Secretary McAdoo to a program for longer work days, open shop conditions and more important roes for apprentices and helpers to the end that much needed repair work on motive machinery and rolling stock may be speeded up. 1 Here' is a notable instance of the willing ness of patriotic American labor to come to the aid of : the government in a serious emergency. It "contrasts sharply with the recent performances of woodworkers in eastern shipyards performances that drew a warm rebuke from the president The arrangement with the railway em ployes is temporary. Under it the men make important concessions as to working condi tions, but they have not surrendered or been asked to surrender any right or privilege. They have simply entered into friendly part nership with Uncle Sam for the best possible working out . of a purpose in which they, in common with all other citizens, have a vital interest. ; ' It is universally agreed by all but self ish profiteers that there should be no relaxa tion from established labor standards and conditions during the (war except such as may be called for from time to time tempo rarily by exigencies that threaten' harm to the nation's cause. That has been the policy of the British government and public toward British, labor, and labor, on its side, under takes to make concessions when emergencies command that action. Labor is not apart from but it is an In tegral part of the government In serving the government" loyally it serves itself. No ?roup or class interest can dissociate itself rom the government and still lay valid claim to patriotism, whether it represent la bor, capital, business or the professions. For the purposes of this war there is only one bandwagon. Over that flies the flag. rrniw One Year Ago Today In the War. ' Austria, in reply" to United States, sought to justify U-boat ruthless war. lare. " - Supreme court of United States de cided British ateamer Appam waa brought Into American port by Ger man prize crew In violation ot Amer ican neutrality. : ' ; The' Day We Celebrate. Dr: Charles ,W. Pollard, physician, born 1871. " . Frank W. Corliss, president of the Waterloo Creamery company, born 1842.. ' Prof. Archibald C. Coolldge of Har ward university,, born in Boston, il jears ago. - Dr. Albert Parker fitch, former president of Andover seminary, born !n Boston. 41 years ago. -William 3. Sweeney, .shortstop, born .it Covington. Ky., 12 years ago. , , This Day In History. 1831 General Philip H. Sheridan. rn at Albany, N. T. Died at Non 4Uitt, Mass:, August 6, 1888. 1886 Colonel James Bowie, killed &t the taking of the Alamo. Born in Georgia about lt0. . s . t 1882 Serbia was proclaimed a kingdom. Prince Milan assuming the title of King Milan I. t 1892 Popular welcome at Indian apolis to ex-President Harrison on his arrival at tha close of bis admlnistra ' tion. .. ..... ....... . v ..,.. Just SO Years Ago Today Special policemen B. W. Brtggs, J. D. Harrison. Henry Morgan, Max H. Reuterlef and Q. Hyde have furnished the necessary bonds for. a faithful performance of duty. The bakers of Omaha announce that they will make loaves of 18 ounces ot bread which will retail tor S cents. Loaves ot S3 ounces will sell for 10 cent The Cable Tramway company have begun the operation - of the Dodge street line. The ministers of the Methodist churohes in Omaha held their regular meeting in the parlors of the Millard hotel. - t, ' ; . .; . . : : .1 : :, Among tho.e present at a meeting of the South Omaha Stock Yards com pany were:- J. A. McShane, J. L. Sharp, W. A. Paxton, Isaac Walxel, Milton Rogers. M. C. Keith. P. E. Her, Joseph Nicholson and John F. Boyd ' . t. - - Right to the Point I Minneapolis Journal: In the mat ter of rising, the sun will shortly beat you to it It you don't hop lively. Wall Street Journal: In six months the British navy safely convoyed 4,500 merchantmen over the North Sea. Britannia still rules some ot the most useful, waves. . Louisville Courier-Journal: A war garden planted early and planted and 'tended late will mean a profitable summer and plenty in cans next win ter, when canned goods may be not only high, but hard to buy at any price. . , Minneapolis Tribune: Bolo says he has a thousand reasons why he should not be executed. 'The French au. thoritles have one satisfactory reason why he should. Another case of where the 1,000 to 1 shot loses. New ' YorK Herald: "Count von Hertllng complains of lack of under-' standing in thts country of the fact that kings and princes dominate the state in Germany. If there is one thing about Germany clearly under stood in this country it is that New York World: Tha practical Germans do not expect much food out of the Ukraine over a single-track railroad in bad condition with one change of gauge. Taking Odessa is the alternative. Grain sent from Kleft down the Dnieper and up the Danube to Vienna must go as far as from Presidio down the Rio Grande and up the Mississippi to Keokuk: and in summer only. There are limits to the amount of food at present available from that quarter, State Press Comment Gothenburg Independent: Our criticism of this mysterious bread we are trying to 'eat without looking at is that it needs pneumatic treatment It has been worked too much and was not allowed to loaf and get puffed up. Aurora Sun: This community has a citizen who has spent 39.80 worth of time explaining to his friends why he could not contribute 33 to the Red Cross. Would you employ this man if you were looking for an efficiency expert? i , Kenesaw Progress: Nebraska is in the lead again, but that occurs so often that we are becoming accus tomed to it and receive the announce ment as Just a matter of course. This time this great commonwealth is ahead of all the other states ot the union in promptness and completeness of its war income tax returns. We may know of a few instances where disloyalty crops out and slackerlsm occasionally comes to the surface, but in the main good old Nebraska la there and over. Norfolk Press; We would like to know Just what Attorney Veeder for Swift & Co., meant when he said in his letter to L. F. Swift, referring to a Nebraska bill disadvantageous to the packers .that "it cannot in Mr. Selby's opinion, pass the senate. If necessary he will take such action as will inrure its defeat" Just what ac tion could a packers' representative take that "would insure, the defeat" of, a law in the legislature of Ne braska. Mr. Selby's confidence in his ability to kill the bill is interesting 1 and we should like to know Just how I he Intended doing It Here and There ! , Cows to which the phonograph was played while they were being milked are said to have given several quarts of a milk a day more than they ever did before. , When his church was closed tor lack of fuel a pastor in Glendive, O., mailed copies of his sermon to all members of his flock so they could read at home what he had to say. A silver shell-shaped reliquary containing a lock of the hair ot Mil ton, together with a lock ot hair of Elizabeth Barrett Browning, sold at auction in London recently for 300. John Flowers of Washington, I1L, didn't know his own age, and fear ing he might be a slacker registered, and is now in the National army at Camp Dodge. His wife learned re cently from county records that he is 40. A philanthrophic banker at Green wich, Conn., ave a dinner at his home to a number of paroled convicts. One of the number improved the oc casion by making away with some of the silver tableware and personal Jewels ot the host . Both goods and thief were found in Philadelphia. . An, eminent naturalist who made a careful study ot the manner in which lighthouses cause the death of birds, has found that in most in stances the bird is not killed by the impact of dancing against the light house window. The cause of death Is exhaustion from flying round and round the light 7 JA Wages of Farm Labor. Monroe, Neb., March 4. To the Editor ot The Bee: A short time ago there appeared in your paper an ar ticle from Farmer, S. D., stating that a farmer by the name of Chris Har gens was paying a man by the name of Pat Kelly 3104 per month as a farm laborer and that if he boarded him it would amount to 3140 or 3180 per month. This looked out of all reason, so I wrote to Mr. Hargens and received the following reply: "Mr. E. R. Dack. Monroe, Neb. Dear Sir: In regard to your favor of February 20,1 in reply will say it is a mistake or newspaper talk. I am paying only 355 per month and fur nish, same as you do, cow, house, gar den spot and wood. Single men 340 per month the year around. Yours truly, CHRIS HARGENS." Now we all know that good farm labor is scarce and that wages are higher, but articles cuch as appeared in your paper are written to cauBe dissatisfaction among the farm labor ers and are little short of German propaganda. E. R. DACK. Slaking of Slates. Omaha, March 4.-To the Editor of The Bee: The "outs" are out again. Their first big meeting, announced as a patriotic banquet started off fine. Then somebody threw a brick Into the machine. Someone let another candidate into the meeting and he wouldn't stand at the hitching post like the rest of the pie-huncry hopefuls. Couldn't blame him either when the attempt was made to railroad through a "slate-making committee" appointed by the chairman of this great spontaneous demonstration. The promoters were taken off their feet by the bold candidate's refusal to slide along peacefully, with the rest ot the mule-skinners. Incidentally the disgruntled candi date said a mouthful when he spoke against "slate making, whether it be in the back of the Budweiser saloon or in a lawyer's office." One thing he didn't mention was the promise evidently to be wrung out of every candidate who will be picked for this elate. That is, the promise to make mayor the candidate in whose tavor the meeting was con ducted Methinks their was a great deal of criticism of the present bunch of commissioners because they had agreed previous to the election that Jim Dahlman should again be mayor if a sufficient number were elected to make him mayor. Guess it all de pends on who's wearing the shoe. Per fectly all right evidently, for the outs to make such an agreement But can you imagine what's going to happen to the "slate" when Dan Butler, Ed Howell, Harry Zimman and Bill Ure are asked to make this promise? Oh, boys! The outs will surely be on the out then. Voters, keep your eyes peeled for the big blow-off. J. F. MURPHY. LINES TO A LAUGH. "How Is Hal getting' oh in hi race with his millionaire rival for tbe band ot the pretty debutante?" , - "Well, I saw them together the other day, and judging from the view I had, Hal was holding bl own." Baltimore Ameri can. - , First Thespian I wonder if the ghost will walk this week? Second Ditto There Is one thing certain; If the ghost doesn't walk, we will. San Francisco Chronicle. Friend Doctor, bow do you manage to stand the high cost of living? " Surgeon By cutting out something. Brooklyn Citizen. Wife Tou know, Henry, I speak as I thlpk. . , . Husband Yes, my love: only oftener. . Topeka Journal. , . , "What does the old song say?' "What song?" v "It goes like thts Spring would be but gloomy weathar If we had nothing else but spring." "I think I could stand six months of it, however, without complaining." Baltimore American. r "What did you put in tils sandwich goldleaf?" "The color ' deceived you. That's cheese." "The thinnest deceived me. That's 1L" Louisville Courier-Journal. Te, sir, my wife is a remarkable woman. Goes to church, saves systematically, and lives up In every way to her sense of duty." "I should think that would make yon very happy." "In a way It does. I am happy In the consciousness that I am a philosopher." Life. . "John wss a good man," said the dlseen-, solate widow, "but he was so old-fashioned to the last." t i "How so?" asked the sympathetic friend. 1 ' "Well, he got killed by a runaway horse.' . Minneapolis Tribune. ! Jones Did you get that mining stock at ; bargain? i Brown Tes; I gave other mining stock for it Boston Globe. "Does she really speak French as well as she pretend, ?" "AU the testimony I have on the sub ject is, I heard her the other day tell her husband to send the snuffer to the gar ridge for the tttermoblll." Judge. A TWENTIETH CENTURY PAUL REVERE. Listen, my children, and you will hear Of another rider than Paul Revere; Of a tiny lad on a strange, strange ateed. Who rode a race for his country's need. He heard of his country's call for men: He heard of their sacrifices, and then--He heard of the need for money too; For food and clothes to help them thru. He wanted to help, tho he could not fight; He wanted to serve In the cause of right So he mounted a Thrift Card, reins In hand. And ,roda and rode throughout the land. "Money!" he cried, "money for clothes!" "The boys In tbe trenches" off ha oes; And 'mid the sound of the clattering boots The call re-echoed across the roofs "Gather your nlckles! Gather your dimes Help the nation! Prepare, these times! Tne people neara, as me uvr iimbubu v. They heard his fevered, earnest cry. And, out of the stockings laid away. And out of the closets hid from day. They gathered their savings of many years. And poured them forth, with hearty cheers. "Take these!" they cried, "in the cause of . right We'll save for the boys who nobly fight 1" As on ha sped, he heard them eay, "We'll do our bit save every day." And when the boy and his valiant steed Had spread the call of his country's need He drew the reins of old "Thrift Stamp," And petted his nose, all sweaty and damp; "Our work Is done,'' he said, "old man, The nation's roused to the "Wr Thrift Plan." Make Your Own Cough Syrup and Save Money Better than tha ready-made kind. Easily prepared at borne. ), The finest cough 'syrup thaf money can buy, costing only about one-fifth as much as ready-made preparations, can easily be made up at home. The way it takes hold and conquers distresainff coughs, throat and chest , colds will really make you enthusiastic about it Any drugsri8t can supply you with. Wi bunoes of Pinex '(60 cents worth). Pour this into a pint bottle and fill the bottle with plain granulated sugar syrup. Shake thoroughly and it ia ready for use. The total cost is about 65 cents and gives yon a full pint & family supply of a most effectual, pleasant tasting remedy. It keeps per fectly. It a truly astonishing how quickly it acta, penetrating through every air passage of the throat and lungs loosens and raises the phlegm, soothes and heals the inflamed or swollen throat mem branes, and gradually but surely tha annoying throat tickle and dreaded cough will disappear entirely. Nothing; better for bronchitis, spasmodic croup whooping cough or bronchial asthma. Pinex is a special and highly concen trated compound of genuine Norway pine extract, and is known the world over for its prompt healing effect on the throat membranes. Avoid disappointment by ..sklng your druggist for ''a ounces of Pinex" with -full directions and don't accept any thing else.- A guarantee of absolute sat isfaction or money promptly refunded, goes with this preparation, She inex Co., Ft Wayne, Ini r ' HOSPFS' Player Piano Demonstration Week NOTE OUR SHOW WINDOWS Grandma Treadaling the Player Piano Grandchild doing like play! It's play to play the Player which we now offer to the musical public. Nothing as Easy, nothing as Reliable, nothing as Cheap or easy to Buy as the Gulbranson the Healy, and the Hospe Player Pianos Come to the store no charge to demon-strate-This is the week and it's for your edification : Costs you nothing. A. HOSPE CO. 1513 Douglas Street f THE OMAHA BEE INFORMATION BUREAU 71 I ' , J '" Washington, D. C. ri . Enclosed find a 2-cent stamp for which you will please send me, , entirely free, "The Poultry Book." , . Name . . .... .V Street Address 'I ICity . .State ...,-... ..xsxnctsam j