6 B
THE OMAHA SUNDAY BEE: MAKUH 3, 1918.
The Omaha Bee
DAILY (MORNING) EVENING
. SUNDAY
" FOUNDED BY EDWARD ROSEWATEW
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FEBRUARY CIRCULATION
62,544 Daily Sunday, 54,619
ln armiitlue for tlx moo to. subscrlb and swore. if DwIaM
Wlilhuns. Clrculitlon Minswr.
Subecribers leaving tha city ahould have The Bee Mailed
to tbsm. Addroaa changed oltaa aa rtqua.Ud.
"'Save food every day; it is needed over there.
vVe soon will know who is the bigger man,
the baker or Uncle Sam. ' '
Just want to remind you that if you are not
registered you can not vote.
f-Eat substitutes for wheat and meat; they
ought, to be good, for they cost enough.
Mature is, making amends for some of the
dreadful things that happened in January.
' The bolshevik is hurling back the invader by
the simple process of keeping out of his way..
Joy riding and the accident list go together
always, and the epidemic is setting in unusually
earjy this time. - .' " ' '
"At least none of the packers so far mentioned
has any especial reason for complaining of his
place on the pay roll.
t-w- r ,
At the rate of a box of soap being so much
for a major general, what might a "buck" pri
vate easonablyjokjc '
Do not overlook the change in stops that
goes into effect today on the street railway. . You
can help by being careful.
"The flowers that bloom in the spring, tra la,"
will have, to hurry to overtake candidates blos
soming out for city hall jobs.
In filling those legislative vacancies Governor
Neville will have another opportunity to show
what a fine nonpartisan democrat he is.
The auto show is not over, but the exhibits
Vvllt ti transferred from the Auditorium to the
public thoroughfares rtid the; parade will con
tinue indefinitely. . v. ,.. . . '
Our hyphenated contemporary 1 is , having a
hard time camouflaging its black blotch of pro
Germanism, which, like the "damned spot" in
Macbeth, "will not out."-
Austria does not require a great deal of King
Ferdinand of Roumanta to start on just his
abdication. When the "renegade Hohenzollern"
is disposed of thea terms for. his people may be
pronounced. ' ; .
Our boys in the trenches .have fairly with
stood every test the Hun has so far applied. ' It
may be accepted that the kaiser will not try the
sector held by the Americans as the weakest
point on the line.
Better Fuel for Future. ,
Out of the experience of the last winter "has
arisen a movement in search of a better way of
using bituminous coal. Scarcity of anthracite has
imposed the inconvenience of the cheaper and
more plentiful fuel, with its accompanying dirt
and annoyance of gases. To make this as useful
and to save some of its value that now escapes
through imperfect combustion is one of , the
quests of fuel engineers. From Pittsburgh comes
the word that a process has there been perfected
that will aid the consumer in his problem. Under
this plan bituminous coal is distilled at a lower
temperature and somewhat more slowly tljan is
the practice in making coke. Thus the more vola
tile properties are driven off, to be elsewhere
treated, and what is left is almost wholly fixed
carbon, ready to be burned. This fuel has been
tested under conditions of actual service and
found to have considerable advantage over an
thracite or the common coke. From the distilla
tion the several gases and tar products are
"trapped" for industrial uses, and what is now
not only waste, but an actual nuisance is made
serviceable. Plenty of this coal product is prom
ised for the coming winter and it will bejrelcome
if it only does half what is claimed for it.
, Scope of the Special Legislative Session.
While it- is accepted as settled that the Ne
braska legislature will be reconvened in special
session to provide a way by which citizens in
the military service may vote, it remains for the
governor to decide whether any other subject of
legislation shall be considered by the lawmakers.
The constitution seems to be-plain enough on
tliis score, for it says:
"The governor may. on extraordinary occa
sions, convene the legislature by proclamation,
stating therein the purpose for which they are
convened, and the legislature shall enter upon
no .business except that for which they were
called together." .
There is already an outcropping demand
through the state for an immediate repeal of the
so-called "Mocket law," making compulsory in
struction in foreign languages in the grammar
grades of the public schools when petitioned for
a lawwhose repeal was admittedly blocked
last year by the machinations of the pro-German
propagandists by means of a deal with the spon
sors of the suffrage bill. The Bee believes this
case should be reopened, even if nothing else is
brought in. We believe, however, that the gov
ernor should, before issuing his extra session
proclamation, carefully go over other possible
legislation demanded by war conditions which
should not be delayed and enumerate them among
the subjects to be acted .on by the lawmakers.
For our part, we would be quite willing to have
the proclamation specify the particular laws now
kr mind and any other subjects which the gov
ernor might bring to their attention by special
message. '
1 1 -
Women Workers in France.
Careful study is being given to the status of
women workers in France, particularly of those
who are employed in munitions factories, looking
ahead to readjustments that must be made when
peace comes again. While no general modifica
tions of present plans, except as concerns night
work, is immediately contemplated, the author
ities are trying to anticipate needs so that the
readjustment will be made with as little jarring
as possible. Experience has given . a verdict
against employment of women at night.
Various reasons enter into this, butymost
potent is the serious social disadvantage result
ing from such practice.. As far back as June '29,
1916, a circular was ' issued on the point, pre
scribing certain limits for the employment of
women at night, and gradually employers began
voluntarily extending the restrictions. Last May
the government undertook a study of 787 plants
in which 58,784 women were working at night,
the average time of 10 hours. While it was found
that improvements had been made in conditions,
following the circular of 1916, it was determined
that no girls under 18 should be allowed to
work at nights, and it is also urged that night
work for women be entirely suppressed when
ever conditions will allow the production of the
same output by means of day labor alone. When
ever the output of a factory is to be reduced, it
must first be accomplished by laying off the
night shifts of women workers. '
These steps are the result of an experience
that will have a lesson for the American em
ployer. No emergency calling for .the general
employment of women, has yet arisen in this
country, although many have taken places of
men in some industry.' Such as are at work are
under strict regulation as to hours and surround
ings, and in the interest of all these should not
be relaxed. We can learn a great deal from the
experience of the French and English in regard
to the solution of our labor problems.
The Mooney Cfse and Russia.
Uneasiness is expressed in Washington be
cause of the possible effects on Russia of the
outcome of the Mooney case at San Francisco.
The California supreme court has just given its
affirmation to the sentence of death passed on
Thomas J. a Mooney as a principal in the bomb
outrage, when persons watching a preparedness
parade in San Francisco were killed by the ex
plosion of an infernal machine set on. a crowded
corner. Defenders of Mooney have alleged un
fairness at his trial and have sought a new trial
through every channel open to him. The case
has been seriously taken up by organized labor
and President Wilson's mediation board, which
inquired into the circumstances, reported a state
of facts that seemed to justify the hope at Wash
ington that a rehearing would be granted by the
California supreme court. This has been denied,
but the fact does not warrant worry over how it
will affect the bolsheviki. The far more impor
tant point is whether justice has been done. A
terrible crime has been committed, for which
somebody is responsible, and the guilty should
not escape punishment. Thomas J. Mooney has
been found guilty and so held on review of his
case by the highest court to which he can ap
peal. His friends allege that unfair methods and
suborned perjury were employed to secure this
result. 'All of this ought to be thoroughly inves
tigated,, that the truth may be established. We
owe this duty to ourselves. It does not matter
how the affair is viewed abroad if only it be de
termined that no injustice is done at home.
. Views, Reviews and Interviews-
War Experts Bring Radical Changes in Our System
of Popular Education
Traveling on the train in company with a
delegation of Nebraska school people headed
for the session of the superintendents' sec
tion of the National Educational association
at Atlantic City, the conversation naturally
centered upon the war and its probable ef
fects upon the instruction in the public
schools. All of the authorities, I find, are
agreed that some radical changes in our
methods of education are bound to be brought
about in the wake of the world conflict and
nowhere more than in the United States.
These changes are not to be confined to mere
revision of text books, redrawing the maps
in our geographies, rewriting our histories
and rearranging the selections in the read
ers or restricting foreign language teaching,
but are to go far deeper. The slogan is al
ready being proposed, "Education for De
mocracy," or "Education for American Citi
zenship," and the goal of the whole scheme
of education is to be kept in view and serve
as the guide at every step of progress to
wards it. The school people are realizing
as never before that the weak spot of our
teaching has been its failure to connect up
the new generation fully with the practical
poblems confronting them when they start
out in the every day world too much hit-or-miss
merely to make passing marks. In a
word, the needed thing is to make the pub
lic schols more . efficient agencies for pre
paredness for democracy and the duties of
citizenship. Not from anything said directly
in point, but rather from the drift of the
argument, I conclude that we are, likely to
undergo in the course of a short time some
tremendous steps toward unification of our
educational system through some form of
centralized supervision and control. This
would bridge a long gap and may still be in
the distance, but our schools are sure to
experience the centralizing influence of the
forces let loose by the war as are our rail
roads, our industrial organisations, our fi
nancial institutions, our medical and sanitary
agencies and all the other big factors in
world progress.
I received a note the other day from Bar
oness Adelina Patti Cederstrom acknowledg
ing and reciprocating New Year's greetings
which we have exchanged for many years.
The note is all in her own writing. Yes, it
was opened by the censor, but gives the in
formation which I know will gladden many
friends who were thrilled by the matchless
voice of the diva in the height of her oper
atic fame that at the age of 75 she is well
and in good health in her beautiful castle in
Wales.
' Reading the Trotzky book gives a view
of some of the peculiar angles that make the
Russian war situation so complicated and
difficult of understanding. The book in ques
tion was evidently written by Trotzky while
in seclusion in Switzerland and before the
overthrow of the czar and is largely in the
nature of a lamentation over the defection of
the German socialists from the true prin
ciple of international socialism. The elu
sive ideal which socialists like Trotzky have
been pursuing is based on the assumption
of solidarity of labor as against capital, that
all wars are capitalistic wars and that by
concerted action of the working men of all
countries not to do the fighting nor to make
the weapons, munitions and supplies war
would be rendered impossible. The eye
opener came when the German socialists ral
lied to the support of the kaiser and the
German war lords in direct contradiction of
all their fine professions of fealty to the
principles of the international.
; The most telling chapter is that which pil
lories the explanations offered by every bel
ligerent country that it is engaged in "a .war
of defense." In incisive style Trotzky quotes
the declaration of (he German socialist group
that they must adhere to the cause of the
fatherland, "to avert the danger of Russian
despotism," without mentioning the "liber
ating" mission of this war in behalf of the
peoples or Russia. He continues: "While
desperate efforts were made to represent the
war as one of pure"defense, to secure the
safety of Germany's possessions, it was at
the same time pictured as a revolutionary
offensive war for the liberation of Russia
and of Europe from czarism,'' so, in defense
of Germany against threatened attack from
Russia, the kaiser poured his hordes of
troops into inoffensive Belgium in order to
attack France before it had time to defend
itself. The world catastrophe, we are re
minded, began with Austria s ultimatum to
Serbia and "Austria naturally was guided
solely by the need of defending its borders
from its uneasy neighbor." He takes up all
the countries, France, Russia, England, the
Balkan states all insisting that they arc en
gaged in a war of defense." "It is superfluous
to add that Serbia and Montenegro, Belgium
and Luxemburg, could also produce some
proof of the defensive characters of their
policies. Thus all of the countries were on
the defensive; none was the aggressor." .
Trotzky's conception of the task of diplo
macy, as outlined in this book, foreshadows
his later action in publishing the secret trea
ties he found in the archives in Petrograd.
Let me quote just one paragraph on this
point: v v
"Diplomacy has a two-fold task to per
form. First,, it must bring -about war at
the moment most favorable for its own
country from the international as well as
the military standpoint Second, it must
employ methods which throw the burden
of responsibility for the bloody conflict, in
public opinion, on the enemy government.
The exposure of diplomatic trickery, cheat
ing and knavery is one of the most impor
tant functions of socialist political agita
tion. But no matter to what extent we
succeed in this at the crucial juncture, it
is clear that the net of diplomatic intrigues
in themselves signifies nothing either as
regards the historic role of the war or its
real initiators. Bismarck's clever maneu
vers forced Napoleon III to declare war
on Prussia, although the actual initiative
came from the German side."
In an article in the current Harpers Charles
Edward Russell goes into the same subject
and insists that after this war socialism will
be entirely different from what it was before,
and especially international socialism, which,
up to this time, has been managed and ma
nipulated by the German socialists as if it
were their own original invention and prop
erty. He is confident that in future socialist
congresses the English and French social
ists, the Russian socialists and the Ameri
can socialists will refuse to be led around by
the Germans or to accord them the prepon
derant representation which they have al
ways claimed as due to their numbers.
"Why sugar is not selling at 30 cents a
pound," is the caption of an advertisement
that went the rounds of the periodicals not
long ago. I have my father's diary, which
I have referred to here at different times,
which contains a memorandum of household
expenditures at the time he set up his own
home here in Omaha about the fall of 1864.
One of the entries notes the purchase of six
pounds of sugar for $2. Of course, it was
in the more or less depreciated paper cur
rency of the day, yet probably at that a
brown or soft sugar, but who would like to
pay that much now? '
Early reports from winter wheat and rye fields
in the state are encouraging. It is a little early
yet to crow, but indications all favor a' good
yield from? the sowing of last fall.
Petty Graft on War
Dependents ,
Captain John Andrews, United States
army, stationed at Jefferson Barracks, has
performed a soldierly act in bringing to pub
lic attention one of the" pettiest grafts the
progress of the war has developed. Under
the war insurance law survivors of men
killed in the army or navy, and other per
sons entitled to war and insurance benefits,
can readily receive their dues by- com
munication with the Bureau of 'War Risk in
surance at Washington. "All of such "per
sons have lately been receiving circular let
ters from claim agents, offering to collect
the amounts due for, a certain percentage
thereof. Captain Andrews stigmatizes all of
such claim agents as usurers and has had
printed a letter from the secretary of the
treasury in which their usurious conduct is
still more strongly . stigmatized.
The secretary of the treasury, after
clearly pointing the way in which any per
son entitled to such benefits can get them
without the payment of commissions, writes:
"The greed and avarice of those' who would
prey upon the misfortunes of the survivors
of a gallant American soldier or sailor, can
not be condemned or reprehended too se
verely." In addition, he warns the sharks that
something which may appeal to men of their
stamp more than either condemnation or
reprehnesion is awaiting all convicted of the
act. The law, he says, by not providing for
the payment of- commissions, makes their
collection illegal and subjects the collectors
to fine and imprisonment. That may give
them pause.
The procedure for the collection of such
claims is simple. The Bureau of War Risk
insurance, . Treasury department, will for
ward, on application, blanks to be filled out
by persons claiming under the law. On the
necessary proof thus afforded, when the
proof is Yomplete the check will be for
warded. No discounts. No fees. No com
missions. Uncle Sam doesn't discount his
own paper. St. Louis Globe-Democrat.
People and Events
No true patriot begrudges Medicine Hat
an early and prolonged vacation.
Window dressers are the only real vision
aries of early spring. Others must be con
tent with the intoxication of hope.
One of the big tobacco companies
cleaned up $28.66 a share last year. Big
smokes and big profits are old time pals,
only more so in war time. ,
Senator Knute Nelson, the G. O.' M. of
Minnesota, is a statesman unafraid of reveal
ing the business activities of his forbears.
"Descended from a long line of Norwegian
pirates," he says, openly.
. Uncle Sam is unable to supply export de
mands for silver, and is obliged to import
some of the metal from Mexico. South
America, China and British India are buy
ing all the silver they can get. All of which
suggests the possibility of removing bygone
silver mine, stock from the class of decora
tive souvenirs.
The alien land law of Minnesota, hitherto
neglected, takes on fresh life under war con
ditions. Under the statute an alien is al
lowed to own 90,000 square feet of land, or
a little less than two acres, uncultivated, and
to own 160 acres occupied and cultivated
by the owner. Steps have been taken to en
force the law and strike alien landlords in a
vital spot.
Rev. Dr. Burris A. Jenkins, a Kansas
City pastor, touched the heart chords of
Missourians in a noon-hour speech before
the City club in St. Louis. He had just re
turned from the front in France, had seen
things Vover there" and warned the audi
ence against revealing military secrets. The
senior United States senator (W. J. Stone)
was branded as "unworthy of being entrusted
with, any military secret which would be of
use to the enemy." A mighty shout of ap
proval greeted the doctor's .charge. "Why, I
thought you people were going to send him
back to the senate for another term," the
surprised speaker suggested, which brought
forth a chorus of "No, no." Evidently St.
Louis is waking up.
I l OnAV
pne Year Ago Today In the War.
v German Foreign. Secretary Zlmmer.
maun admitted the Mexican-Japanese
ploW '
Russians reported to have captured
Mamadan, in Persia, from the Turks.
" In fierce fighting north of Ancre.
British drove Germans back on five
mil front
The Day We Celebrate.
. George M. Strain, secretary and
treasurer of the Kimball laundry,
born, 1873. - ..
Dr. Hayes G Banter, dentist, born
1870, - ""
Alexander Graham Bell, perfector
of the telephone, born In Edinburgh,
Scotland. 71 years ago.
Stephen M. Barrett secretary of the
Oklahoma State Board of Vocational
education, bora at Nebraska City,
Aeb.. 63 years ago today.
John D. Snoop, superintendent of
the public schools of Chicago, born at
Sabina, O 1 years ago today.
This Dar In History. ' '
,1815 The United States declared
war upon Algiers.
1861 The czar decreed the eman
cipation of the serfs (33,000,000)
throughout the Russian empire.
186i Congress tendered a vote of
hanks to General George H. Thomas
.'or his victory at the battle of Nash
ville. 1S99 The office of admiral of the
navy was created, and bestowed upon
George Dewey, hero of the battle of
Atil. ha.- "
Just SO Years Ago Today
Colonel J. M. Eddy has been pro
moted by the Missouri Pacific com
pany ana now has complete charge
of its Omaha business.
Durins tht absence of 1r rnmnanv
No. a at a fire nirht before lnjit
thief sneaked into the engine house
and made away with a valuable liver-
colored bird dog that was a great
pet with the members of the depart
ment. On Monday L. O. Jones will ofTer
several extraordinary bargains In the
children's department at 1309 Far
nam etreet Among them will be
bOVS Solid red anil . Iitn mtrlnoA
Dlaited waists at 2& rni
Mr. and Mrs. W. J. Bell returned
from Australia last week. They are
enroute to England and will be ac
companied by Miss Lowe, sister of
iirs. Bell. ,
Mayor Broatch said that thort are
but five saloon keepers in the city
whose licenses bear his signature i:nl
consequently all ither proprietors ot
alnorta nr snllln llauor illegally. '
Signposts of Progress
A frame has been invented to en
able one man to operate a two-man
saw. '
St. Louis Is experimenting with sur
rounding traffic policemen at night
with light thrown from searchlights
mounted on nearby buildings.
For the use of physicians and den
tists a tongue depressing instrument
has been Invented that switches on
an electric light to illuminate a pa
tient's mouth.
The establishment of the first rural
free postal delivery in the Paclc will
be completed next March when the
service will be given the homestead
ers In the Haiku district on the Island
of Maul, Hawaii.
A point on the credit side of muni
tion factories is that in populous dis
tricts of England they are helping to
solve the slum problem by eliminating
the slums,' for as fast as factories
spring up and extend slums come
down. , - ' ; ' .
Receipts from the sale of timber in
the national forests in the last fiscal
year totaled $1,692,520. Fees for the
grazing of livestock amounted to SU
MS, 794, and, with other receipts,
made a grand total of income from
Uncle Sam's wood lot of $3,457,028.
Alexander Graham Bell recently re
marked that the world will probably
depend upon alcohol more and more
n ItmA trnnm nn ind that A PTPfl t flftlri
1 of usefulness is opening up for the
engineer who will modify our ma
. thinery to enable alcohol to be used
i as the source of power.
Here and There
To give him absolute quiet a Dutch
scientist has had three rooms built,
one inside the next, and has created
vacuums between the walls.
In Denver it is estimated that 'there
are 10,000 women who speculate In
oil, and probably 500 who keep a
close daily watch on the markets. .
If King George were to abandon
his throne and abjure titles he would
be known as plain Mr. Windsor, which
is the family name ot the British
sovereign. ,
Without counting 1,413 men already
serving lr dockyards nad military sta
tions on the outbreak ot the war,
5.051 London police officers are en
gaged in war service.
It has been estimated by a scientist
that in a lifetime ot 70 years a man
grows nails which, if It. were possible
to preserve them uncut, would reach
the length et seven feet nine inches.
The house . in Joppa, Palestine,
where St. Peter stayed with Simon,
the tanner, is to be secured by the
church army as a center for the care
of British troops fighting in Palestine.
A Pittsfleld (Mass.) druggist re
fused to sell a woman cought drops
on Monday because he didn't know
whether they were considered drugs
or candy and he did not wish to vio
late the law. .
A dense fog caused' the blunder,
which lost George Washington the
Battle of Germantown. which, his
torians assert, might won our coun
try's freedom at one stroke, averting
six more years ot war -
Peppery Points
Minneapolis Journal: Trotsky must
change his name once more this time
to Deadrunsky.
Minneapolis Journal: Why, we can
remember when the hen did some
thing for her country at 12 cents a
dozen.
Washington Post: Pictures of
French girls walking arm-in-arm with
the Sammies ought to boost the
hegira of young American nurses to
the front.
St Louis Globe-Democrat: Car
ranza has put a head price of $8 on
persons leaving Mexico. Wouldn't
that have been grievous to El Paso
If it had gone dry while Juarez was
still wet?
Baltimore American: What is a
non-essential? One would-be author
ity puts In this class chewing gum.
Easter bonnets and high heels. But is
not this a prejudicial drive against
the comforts of a single sex? What
shall we say of chewing tobacco,
night caps and turned-up trousers?
Minneapolis Tribune: On account
of the shortage of paper, the Con
gressional Record hereafter will be
sent only to persons who read it. The
proofreader in the government print
ing office Is the only person known to
read the publication regularly.
Brooklya Eagle: The gloomy
prophecy that the United States will
be starving in the next 12 months
ought to make a few exceptions. For
instance, there are a number of pes
simistic prophets who will be in a po
sition to eat their words. v
Around the Cities
Sioux City's new grain exchange
reports a membership of 50, including
several grain dealers of Omaha.
Sioux City is not worrying about
the coal supply Just now. A mu
nicipal campaign furnishes consider
able excess heat. The main issue
hinges on approving the present sys
tem of commission government.
It is one trouble after another In
Chicago households. Meatless and
wheatless days are trivial beside the
servants' rule of eat-less days. Two
meals a day is the new limit for -a
cook's workday. Families insisting
on three must fill the vacancy in the
kitchen.
Salt Lake's Pioneer museum boasts
of a recent addition to its collection,
consisting of a piece of the rope
which suddenly ended the career of
Hank Parish, a notorious outlaw of
the early '80's. Hank put "seven
notches on his gun before taking the
pioneer elevator.
Women conductors on St. Louis
street cars find most embarrassment in
remembering all the pockets neces
sary to carry equipment. Recently
a request for transfers brought the
car to a standstill until the conductor,
after searching of the front, recalled
the position of the hip pocket. Then
the car moved and broke the jam.
Recent arrests of thieves in New
York reveals the Job of window clean
ing as peculiarly attractive to sneak
thieves. Three, professionals pursued
the job by day; swiped Jewels and
things within reach, and blew the
proceeds at night. Free spending and
flashy clothes drew police attention
and spoiled the job for a while.
Washington this week is boosting
the pay envelope plan of personal of.
ferings for Rev. Billy Sunday, whose
campaign closes today. It was some
struggle to raise the expense bill of
$52,000, but it was finished a week
ago, and the managers propose to
make the wind up offerings "equal to
those given at Omaha, Los Angeles
ana Atlanta."
Liverpool is one of the few world
cities without a record of a holdup in
25 years. The cause of the immunity
is told by J. G. .Mongrieff of Des
Moines, a recent visitor to the big
port. Many years ago a trial judge
Imposed sentences on bandits which
included periodic applications of cat-o'-nine
tails. Other judges followed
the precedent and the holdup business
disappeared.
ODD BITS OF LIFE.
DOMESTIC PLEASANTRIES.
H haa been arrested nine ti hi fot
violating tbs weights and measures la."
-Yes?" '
"And he always cets off. -"He
must have the acales of Juatic
fixed." Louisville Courler-JaurnaU
Bill Say. he can do some great work
on that bass, fiddle of bts, and ha never
took a lesson. .
Gill No, but he used to put In a lot
of time sawing wood, and I suppose that la
how he got such proficiency In his action.?
Younkers Statesman.
"My boy. you can take a lesson from
the dog that is trotting by your side, anJ
to whom I point as an example. He doesn't
drink, he doesn't smoke, he doesn't ewear "
But If youse don't stop yer pointln' at
him, mister, he'll do some chewing present
ly." Baltimore American.
Tom How is It that you are such a
favorite with the fair sexT Do you always
tell a girl she's pretty?
jack Any amateur can do that I tell
her she Is prettier than some girl I've heard
her acknowledge to be pretty. Puck.
"I know the people are behind me,"
cried the pacifist orator.
"And If you don't start moving they
may catch up to you," cried a menacing
voice In the audience. Cornell Widow,
"How I envy you seafaring men," said
the sweet young lady. "It must be won
derful to gaze on the broad expanse of the
ocean and breathe the clean salt air.'
"Yes," replied the stoker, "it must be."
Boston Transcript.
Cleveland is to have a church ex
clusively for the deaf.
It cost the Canadian government
$1,000 a year for every soldier put in
the field.
During the past year the state po
lice of Pennsylvania patrolled over
800,000 miles of territory and made
upwards of 6,000 arrests. -
When the first train, weighing 1,
245 tons, crossed the new Quebec
bridge It depressed the great central
span only five-sixteenths of an inch.
Hawaii is the only place under
United States control where the hum
ble cent is not used. However, now
that the war tax is effective, it is ex
pected that the . much-despised coin
will become popular in Honolulu.
At a "frugality dance", in Montclalr,
N. J., those wearing patent leather
shoes, silk , stockings' or high collars
were fined 5 cents; those wearing
marcel waves, 10 cents; while those
wearing dress suits or decolette gowns
paid 25 cents.
The government reports 42,170,000
acres of winter wheat sown, the larg
est acreage in history, but under con
dltions not as favorable as last year.
However, a crop of 682,000,000
bushels is within the possibilities.
Last year's crop was ; 418,000,000
bushels.
Colonel Repington, London military
critic, throws out an - mvaslon scare,
fearing the Germans will attempt a
repetition of the I&t invasion of
England, 300 years ago, when a
small fleet of Spanish warships landed
troops on the Cornish coast. . What
happened to the invaders was
a-plenty.
"Mre. Comeup Is not stopping at any ex
pense to break into society. Her prizes at
her charitable card partiea are really
princely."
"What are they? Jewelled ornaments?"
"No, nothing so- common as that. At
her last party the first prize was a ton
of hard coal." Baltimore American.
MODERN VILLAGE
BLACKSMITH. .
H. E. Hancock, In New Tork 8un.
Under a spreading canopy
The Village "Shoffy" stands.
The "Shoff" a mighty man Is he,
With large and itching hands.
And his plethoric pocketbook
Is wrapped with rubber hands.
His hair Is short, and black," and slick.
His clothes are spick and apan.
In his garage are satelltea.
Who graft what'er they can,
But little Is there left when he
Gets through with any man.
Week In, week out, from morn till night,
You hear the nonsklds blow.
You can hear the cusa words from the
boobs
Who dally come and go,
Wond'rlng how so many tack
Got in the village snow.
And children coming home from school
Look In the open door;
They, love to hear a city bloke
Let out an awful roar
Whenever the Village "Shoffy" says:
"That shoe costs fifty-tour.'1
Ho goes on Sunday to the church,
A Jitney there he runs.
And charges twenty cents apiece.
To all the rich men's sons.
And ten to those vho'll stand for It,
And five to other ones.
At night when his garage ta closed
He sits within his home
Giving the butler orders for
Long glasses topped with foam.
While pleasant thoughts ot four-bit gas
Circle inside his dome.
Waiting, expecting, marveling.
unwara tnrougn lite ne goes,
Each morning sees some new one trimmed
For everything but clothes.
One ev'ry minute Is born, he thlrks,
earnum was rigni, ne Knows.
We have won the esteem in which
this undertaking establishment is held
by the public by fair and courteous
methods. Our thorough equipment en
ables us to furnish a dignified burial -'
service and to render a bill consistent
, with the actual worth of the ceremony.
Local aervicea or shipping funerals.
N.P.SWANSON
Funeral Parlor, (Established 18887
17th and Cuming Sts. Tel. Douglas 1060.
!
ESSSBSSSSSSSSSIS9aGSSSSSSSSSSSSSS:SSS9BS9
Join the Red Star
BY REQUEST OF THE SECRETARY OP WAR the American Red Star
Animal Relief has been organixed by Wm. O. Stillman of Albany, N. Y., president
American Humane Association, to conduct a national campaign along the same
lines as those of the Red' Cross, for the aid of horses being used in the war. .
A similar work In the English army has saved the English government thirty
million dollars in horse flesh. 84 of animals treated are cured.
Before the organisation was started, horses injured in battle were shot, now
they are given surgical aid and returned to the front when cured.
The money is needed for shelter tents, ambulances, bandages and medical
supplies to meet emergencies in France. Will you respond by sending $1.00 or
more, and thus do your little bit toward aiding the horse to do his big and noble
bit. The motor truck and the men do what they can the task of the horse is to
do what they CANNOT.
Please fill out application and mail with check to Mr. Ezra Millard, cashier
Omaha National Bank, Omaha, Neb.
All persons contributing will receive a membership card, a button and the
National Humane Review for one year.
NOTE Make all checks payable to
"American Red Star Animal Relief."
Application for Membership
AMERICAN RED STAR
Enclosed please find $ for the Red Star Animal Relief.
Donation $ Name
Membership $1.00 Street and Number
Post Office
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f AN INSURANCE SOCIETY
I Of the People By the People
I For the People
E THE s
S WOODMEN OF THE WORLD I
Stood Every Test Fulfilled Every Pledge
j and is Acknowledged EE
1 The Leading Fraternal Insurance Society
WHY NOT HAVE THE BEST? 1
E Certificates $250 to $5000. Rates reasonable but adequate
H Ring Douglas 4570 No Charge for Explanation.
J. T. Yates, W. A. Fraser, a
2 . Sorereign Cleric. Sovereign Commander.
!fiiiiiiimiiiiiiiiiiiiniiiiiiiHiimiiiiiiiiHiiiiiiiiiiiimHiiiiiitiiiiHiHiiiiiiiiiHHiim
r
THE OMAHA BEE INFORMATION BUREAU
Washington, D. C.
Enclosed find a 2-cent stamp, for which you wl please send me,' I
I entirely free, "German War Practices." .''
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