TtfE BEE: OMAHA, THURSDAY. JANUAKY 31. 1918.
Ella Fleishman.
Adelaide Kennerly
ASS'T EDITOR.
i
4,
Why Not Be Natural?
Yqu May Have Charm
Advice to the Lovelorn
, .-By. BEATRICE FAIRFAX.
"A real nersou" is one who has an
honest knowledge of himself, the ;
Biema! detachment-to stand on and
jriticize that; self, the fineness and
strength to cultivate, the . best and
conquer, the -worst in that' self, and
enough healthy f-r,ulses to thor
oughly . compel vital, energetic liv
ing. '"A 'real ' person" has healthy
instincts, ! normal ' desires andean
honest ay of expressing- them, and
sanify"' 'enough' to respect other people''-'individuality
even while expres
sing his own.
Affectation surely must bore . the
cine' Who ' practices it. It means a
constant strain,, a constant mincing
' aldiig' off tip-toes when 'you want to
sWjde on the.bJls of your feet. And
even as a man must' have an excel
' lerff'tnemOry- to be a good liar, so he
has to keep careful track of his pose
and the things ' he has done to. es
tablish; it, in order to' kp on affect
ing it; ; ; '
Tliei poser is' always forced to live
up-to 'something' he is not. He has to
keep his eye' on : his 'audience to see
If he- is making a successful impres
slo.m He has to go through the strain
ot posturing and grimacing and play
acting.. No matter how much he longs
towash off the "grease-paintu and
"make-up" from his attitude, he has
to go ;on-wearing1 them.
. Now;-for naturalness. What will
'hr do for you? Well, first of all, the
. "Youv. you. honestly are wiil attract
tht frfendships that are honestly con
genial to it and will be able to do the
things-it honestly longs to do.- You
don'.t wear -yourself out when you ex
press' yourself; you just grow freely
along the lines that . are natural for
ytt..-.v'-::.- -;-.',
How are you going to b$ natural?
Iarjprevions.-articles I 'have tried to
Indicate how ydu may' find out what
ydttyrtally-are and ' which of the
: qualities you -really have you want
-f ft :'-trtilte. After you have done
that, wlja you Vaht to do with your
riaturaliiess:"is to bring it into human
relations.' " ..- . :. : '
'.:;;Tbe first use you. ' make, of your
r naturalness , in . y6iir hii'rrian relation
"slMp i? "frankly and 'honestly to ex
press1 the? affe'etidn you feci for peo
pled .-. Suppose" " someone you like
breaks ah appointment : with you.
The Real" Yotl says, "Mike Jerry. I
like him -well enough to excuse him
for failing , me yesterday. Probably
ft "FAd' atrCasoii; Perhaps', he isn't
, quite, brave enough to come, and make
his (xUses . to me for fear I won't
.berievehim.' Well, I like him well
enough -to give him the benefit, of the
doubt., I'U-ask, him. what it was all
..about."' '. ,.' . 1 .,
V That," I insist is 'the natural atti
"jfjiife. -v Bat ' ; we Jiave ' cultivated cer
tarrr !po&ea (of pr,ide. ind dignity. We
have taken a 'positioh of feeling that
certain things are our due and of in
sisting upon them. So what you
probably do is to assume a very top
loftical attitude when Jerry comes
along, and by that pose of frozen
dignity, filled Jerry with an idea that
you don't care much about him after
.11; or that you are almost too exact
ing to be a real friend.
If you like people, express it hon
estly. Don't you see how easy that
will b'e after you have learned to ex
press your tastes and inclinations
honestly? Don't you see how natural
that will be after you have cultivated
your better tastes and inclinations?
Come, Jack Watkins, let us have
you for an example. You have found
out that you are fu.l of fun and that
you like to be amused and enter
taiued that you have a tendency to
let cheap vulgarity amuse and enter
tain j'ou. You try to educate your
love of. wit and humor and beauty,
and you get yourself beyond horse
play humor and burlesque beauty to
an enjoyment of finer things.
You're expressing yourself naturally
enough; only now you go to charming
comedies, instead of tp. ;heap bur
lesque shows, and you wear ties of
a wonderful shade of blue instead of
green ones checked off with purple and
dotted with yellow. You still like a
good time and attractive clothes,' only
now you are reaching a more culti
vated standard of what is fun and
what is beauty.
Wei! now, honest Jack, you are
walking up Main street one evening
and along comes a girl over-dressed,
swaggering, bold,' painted and cheaply
alluring. -Won't you be likely to pass"
her by in favor of the finer type, just
because you have begun, to appreciate
fineness all along the line?
A little later a charming young
woman who is well groomed and full
of the magnetism pf clean, sweet
youth passes by. Now that you have
begun to be natural, your impulse, is
to go up and fairly demand acquaint
anceship with her. This is the par
ticular point at which all writers on
naturalness stop and hesitate. Lucy
Wiltot. is attracted by you, too. Jack.
The natural thing for you two young
sters to do is to scrape acquaintance.
Why can't you? '
First of all, the game just isn't
played that way; and either one of
you seeing the other one ready -to
break the rules of the game, won't
quite trust that other to play fairly
and squarely always and to give an
absolutely honest deal.
Naturalness- in the1 individual is
charming; but it cannot go beyond the
individual and bend the laws of so
cety to its will. Teach1 yourself to
like the'best and to set about at
taining it in the finest and "best" way!
(The next article in this helpful
series by Miss Fairfax will appear
soon in this page. Don't miss it!)
rKoperd'. !;;:',;.
,,,.. VYhat's 4 the 'matter .
i 'p'9rTtby? :. OH,
'- I 'see! '- Tie has no cbl
i Jar- Dog catchers are
liter him. Draw a col
lar quick for him.
. gy 7
.vyj UJ WW rv
n. iu u w -.orte
'2
Chicken Formosa
Heat a piece of narrow until
dissolved; add a few cloves
of garlic and a handful of
rice. When rice cracks
pat in small dressed
cnicnen. Aaaqcoi
beef stock; let sim
mer. Aaacnoppea
green pepper eni
on pimento.
Serve with
CERVA
A par toft drink with teste of hops. Nutritious. Good for di
gestion. wYou can get CERVA et grocers' and. druggists', in fact,
at ail plaices where good drinks are soldi
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' - .1117. Nlllulu St' ' Omaha, N.b. Douglai 3M2
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Te Bachelor Farmer: Tour rommnnlra
tloa Is too long o print. It ha been (Iven
aeriooa eonnlilrratlun berauw of Its Intelli
gent eoftitrurtloii. 8end slf-addre J
tamped envelope for personal reply.
Two Girls.
Pesr Miss Fairfax. Omaha Bee; Reading
your klml advice to others In Th-? Bee, would
you kindly answer the follow Inv queMtotts:
What Is the Kenvral form o( Introduction
u.id: when Introduced, nhould one riae, and
shake hands; when Introducing a friend,
should one use the Mend's namx or the one
being Introduced to th friend. Tirat; when
a lady meet a gontloman friend, which
should spvnk flrat; which shout 1 write flrat,
the gentleman or '.he lad ; what are the
titles of some of the latest war songs: Is It
proper for a lady, who la writing to a young
gentleman, to aak him to write soon: la it
proper to usk a young gentleman, who hkf
accompanied you home, to come In tho
house If It la not too late; would It he
proper when a young gentleman, who has
asked a lady friend to accompany him Mi
a theater for her to aak a lady friend to
go with them without hla permission?
Thanking you In advance for your advice.
TWO ANXIOUS OIHLP.
On the question of Introductions, there
are so many dlffcrcntj occasions for Intro
ductions that you should buy little book
on etiquette and read the forms It would
take too much space to answer In this
column.
"Over There." "jn Having i Wonderful
Time," "One Boy," "When There Is Peace
on Earth," "Over the Tor.' an1 "Keep the
Heme Tires Burning," are tho late war
songs. The last Is one of John McCormack's
succeases.
If you are very well acquainted with the
young man who accompanies yo home, and
the hour Is not late, there Is notlilng wrong
about asking him to have a cup of tea on
a cold night, especially If some member
of your family la. there.
No, never ask another girl to accompany
you. It Is not only an Imposition on the
young man. but shows a lack of breeding
on your part.
An Excuse.
Dear Miss Fairfax. Omaha Bee: I have
been going with a young man several years
my senior. A f -w months ago we became
engaged, but he is of a very Jeatous disposi
tion and lately bus accused me unjustly of
going with other young men. We quarreled
and he has been going with another girl
since. He asked me for all the presents he
gave me which I gave back, but he did not
ask to be released from our engagement. He
Is still going with this other girl and tells
others ho likes her better than he dors me,
but he will not speak to me,
Please advise me as to what I should do,
as I rare a great deal for htm and would
like to get him back. A. K. U
Th're Is nothing you ran do to wtn his
love If It has been transferred to another.
He probably accused you of going with
other young men because he wanted an
excuse to gs with the other girl. 8uch a
man would not make you happy., so why
grieve 1 There are many others
Wait a While.
Dear Mlaa Fairfax, Omaha Bee: It srema
to me as though I am In great trouble and
am undecided what to do, whether to stay
at home and try to make the best of It or
to leave home, which I'm sure would be
agslnst by parnts' will. I am only It) and
I have a sister who Is 10. We hsve never
gotten along at home on account of the
man with whom she keeps company. He
Is a worthless fellow and hasn't many
friends: nevertheless ahe likes hlin and his
never cared for any one else
She knows I don't like her company and
has always been against me. t have taken
many a slap from my mother on account
of him, hut still It keeps up. My sister told
me It It wasn't for me the family would
be better off. Please, Mlaa Fairfax, tell
me what to do? K. 1. 1!
You are too young to leave home. Life
would be very hard for you. Nevertheless,
I can net see why your mother should slap
you. Perhaps it would be better If you
kept silent on tho subject of your sister's
company and requested her to show you the
same consideration.
Sister was propably angry when she said
the. family would be better off without you.
Pay no attention tc her and educate your
self for coma honest occupation. Then you
will be able to go out Into the world for
yourself.
Spinsterhood.
Pear Mlaa Fslrfax, Omaha Bee: Could
you. perhaps, write a few words In your
paper about the girl who hss reachrd the
ago of 36 and Is stilt unmarried. Her fam
ily, not meaning to be unkind, torment her
with teasing remarks upon her unwedded
life and refer to her as "the old maid." Of
course, being a woman, she has considered
marriage, but aurely she should not be ex
pecteu to accept any offer that may be
DTisented to her, but should be allowed to
wait patiently for the one man who can
make life wort'i while. Hoping this has not
bored you. E. K.
No Indeed It hasn't bored me. It Inter
ests me, ss a role of a stupid attitude
which belongs to bygone years and not to
day, Nowadays there Is no stigma In spin
sterhood. Women who find work which
they enjoy and can do well, and who do
not find the particular man with whom
they feel marriage will be a perfect thing,
go about their business cheerfully and se
riously with no attitude at all toward mar
riage. If they meet the right man, the
Joy of life ss nature meant It to be lived
can be theirs. If they do not, there Is
work splenild, ennobling work. To call
a girl of J5 on aid maid Is silly: but still
more foolish is It for a girl to maks her
aelf miserable over good-natured teasing.
Women very fften remain unwed to 30 or
S5 and still never merit or receive the title,
old maid. Tou are foolish and sensitive and
probably tuke an attitude which encourage
teasing. ,
Stop It.
Dear Mlsa Fslrfax. Omaha Bee: Among
my acquaintances Is a very Interesting young
married couple, I go to their home quite
frequently and think a great deal of their
friendship. Hut lately 1 have been getting
quite ardent letters from the young hus
band. 1 am -quite bewildered I have al
ways considered him as a good friend, but
never In any other light.
Now 1 do not want to hurt his feelings,
yet I feel that t cannot continue my vlalta
to his home. I halo to break my friend
ship tor his wife. What shall I do?
P. A. W.
. Drop htm by all means. Such a man la
neither worthy of his wife's tove nor youia.
It Is not half as serious to bresk your friend
ship with his wife as It Is to continue go
ing there and get yourself Into serious
trouble.
A Married Man.
Dear Mlaa Fairfax: t am J. a high
school graduate, and employed as book
keeper, earning tit a week.
Previous to this position, my employer
who has been married for several years,
but has no children .took a great liking to
me. I drclded to leave and learned his
wife had deserted him.
He has' proposed several limes to me;
but since he has not aa yet been divorced I
will not listen to him. Secondly, there la
quite a differences In age, as he Is 81.
Thirdly, It seem aa If I would do Injustice
to my older sister and to my father to. con
sider any matrimonial question at my ag.
I know this msn thoroughly, both so
cially and financially. He Is a man pos
sessing some of the finest qualities. 8. S.
My dear girl, no man who la not divorced
has any right to be talking marriage to
glrL Nor should this man-have started
making love to you when you were In hi
employ and he wan still the husband if an
other woman. Tho difference In' your age
Is not of any great ImportanctV and yds
would certainly no) be doing your parents
an Injustice If yon married a man who
might even be able to help them a
Nor doea the fact that you have an old el
slater, unmarried, cunt. But It la Important
that the man Is not In a position to marry
you.
Not Fair.
Dear Miss Fairfax: A friend has beci
married six months and la still at builnea
Before the mar. lege her fiance consented
to let her work, aa he was likely to be called
to serve Uncle Sam. Now he Is going away
to camp shortly and la settling up some af
fairs the following little misunderstanding
arose. She thought It best to pay both his
and her Insurance for a year In advance. M
which ha agreed very willingly. Now ah
has all of her Insurance signed over to hi t
husband and he, In return, said, as he had
made his well-to-do parents the beneficiaries,
he did not want to ask them for the (near-,
ance papers, as they may foel hurt a boot
hla doing so. Now. as his parents haVf
their son Insured already and the wife pets'
tor this ether policy. Is this fairT ETHEU; r
This Is manifestly unfair." Since the par
ents are already Insured,' are well-to-do and
the wife, on the other hand, la working tai
has paid the premium on her husbands pol
icy It Is only simple Justice that she shouli
be protected. I think If the young husband
state the case plainly to' his psrenta they
will seoognlse that It Is only (air and de
cent for their boy to protect the girl hi
married and swore at the altar to cherish
f they don't are It he most stilt protect
her. To do otherwise were a grave Injus
tice. ' .
Neb..
Neb, '
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HI
Am
The American Homii Has Plenty of MAZOLA- the Pure Oil Pressed from
Corn -- Wonderful In Flavor and Economy
MANY a housewife-- trying Mazola for the ske of saying animal
fats is continuing to use it because it makes fried and sauted
dishes more delicious than butter and lard. -
Good cooks know how easy it is to burn butter and lard in cooking
and so spoil flavor. They know that Mazola does- not easily buralThat
it can be used over and oyer again without carrying the flavor of any
thing cooked in it That it makes fried things more digestible because
it is possible to cook them at a higher heat without burning.
For shortening it is wonderful. Because it is an oil, it is ready to
use without melting. Saves time, works perfectly.
Mazola makes a perfect salad dressing, equal in quality to
one made with the best olive oil, superior to one made with or
dinary olive oil. Jt js easier to mix than an olive oil dressing.
Mazola gives uniformly satisfactory results. Its manu
facture is an exact science.
For sale in pints, quarts, half gallons and gallons.
For greater economy buy the large sizes.
Sitting eprsnrafpe
CAKTAN & JEFFREY CO.
Omaha, Neb.
I Bllil Si m)RN FRITTERS I
Hnmmmsmm
bIEIIMnH M-fMMN
B S H im'M H l rtTSJPK v m s
BIB HHMI Ml !II
llBlillllRslltll
MRS. 8COTT
I 1 cup of floor t rounded teaapoonfuls
Hcupofaillk ot DBktng powaer
I eg is I teespoonlul of salt
1 tableapooolul Masoia icaspooaiui m pxppc
1 cup grated or chopped corn
Sift flour, baking powder, salt and pepper into
bowl: add milk., well -beaten eggs, Masoia and
grated coin, or if tanned corn is used put it through
meat chopper. Add, mix well and fry in deep hot
Masoia. It is best to make the fritters smell. You
are then sure they will be. done through. Use e
leaspoooiul (or each fritter
PS.: Clam fritter, are made the same way, using
one cup of canned minced clams instead of com, or
one cup of fresh clams put through the meat chop
oer When using- fresh clams less milk is used.
:
1 iillM REG.U.S.PAT.0FF. :
fMMWm SALAD J
There is a valuable Cook Book for
Mazola users. It shows you how
to fry, saute, make dressings and
sauces more delicious, make light
digestible pastry. Should he in
every home. Send for it or ask
your grocer FREE.
CORN PRODUCTS REFINING COMPANY
-P.O. Box 161, New York
sb fill
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