THfc tffch: OMAHA, VVkUihSUAX, JULY. 4, lalT.
The Omaha Bee
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JUNE CIRCULATION
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Wsshlnitflo 733 14th St. N. W...
No flag like Old Glory!
Whatever you do, remember safety first.
The Russian $team roller eem to be in pretty
fair working condition again. v. '
Speaking of police department reorganization
eventually, why not now? I
In ancient Rome it was chariot races. Today
it ii auto races. Tomorrow it will be airship
races. .
Independence Day Hope of Humanity.
One l.andred and forty-one years ago today a
little group of ardent patriots, filled with firm re
solve after full and deliberate consideration of
the course they planned, boldly restated a prin
ciple, that of man's right to self-government. It
was not a discovery on their part, but it sounded
strange in the world of that time, devoted more
than ever before to the doctrine of absolutism.
The fruit of democracy had been slowly ripening
in the new soil, where bold spirits had come to
escape from conditions of the older civilization.
Resolute men, whose souls had expanded under
the skies of a new world and who had imbibed
freedom's inspiration from their surroundings,
sounded then the doom of tyranny. The success
of their venture justified their hope and courage.
A new banner was raised around which the
oppressed of all the 'world might gather for
protection and to it flocked all who would escape
the domination of tyrants, petty or great, who
claimed to rule by divine right. Its presence
has been an inspiration and guide, till now the
inalienable rights of man are recognized and
enjoyed by three-fifths of the world's population.
hat banner again flies over a nation in arms,
embattled to ensure the perpetuation of the doc-
triae it represents, and which only can be pre
served by vigorous defense against attack from
whatever source. Our freedom and that, of other
peoples was bought at the price of blood shed
by freemen, to whose example we are prepared
to add by, similar sacrifice in a similar cause.
Usurpation, tyranny and oppression must re
treat before the allied forces of freedom and de
mocracy. Old Glory still holds in its folds the
hope of humanity and the Fourth of July will
yet be given world-wide observation as the an
niversary of the true birth of liberty for all man
kind. . '
Well! Well! Well! What has City Commis
sioner Parks done to the senator that he should
be picked for the goat?
French girls kiss American soldiers as they
pass along the streets in Paris. Now watch the
rush to the recruiting office!
Please note, Mr Bryan, that your countrymen
are still celebrating the Glorious Fourth which
you predicted would be blotted from the calendar!
Why "pick on" Omaha? Have we not enough
troubles of our own that we" must be made to
share 'also those of Iowa's bickering commu
nities? ,..'' I
Noting Uiicle Sam's success with his bond
a1. t)Aah will temol the market with a $450,-
000 Issue. , This ought to be a real test of the city's
credit right now. f
Omaha's program for the day includes such
an array of sporting events as looks like a aur
feit Promoters might do better to string them
out a little more.
Omaha school teachers are not granted all
iney asKeu ior in mq uiauci v jim.imu
but get a substantial boost just the same, for
which they will doubtless be proportionately
thankful. v
While Przemysl and some of its neighbors are
likely to be restored to the news columns, it may
ease the mind a little to know that Hsun Tung
is the new Chinese emperor, but Chang Hsurt is
the man who pulls the strings."
Cuming county's assessment roll present's the
novel showing of horses fattened in taxing value
and autos shrunken almost to scrap pile terms.
If this rule obtains throughout the state the
auto is hopelessly doomed to the taxing dust of
the horse. ,
May set a new record for railroad earnings, a
'total net revenue 'of more than $48,000,000 for
May, over a million and a half above the 1916
k Tigures, which were the previous banner mark.
This is one .reason why the general 15 per cent
VI. . . . I . J
increase in ircigni raics was ocnicu.,
Life insurance for the nation's defenders would
ue a nne ining, u is oniy lair, nowever, mat me
nation as a whole should provide the insurance
-fund rather than put the whole, or part, ot the
load on existing insurance companies, which are,
in fact, merely trustees for their policy holders.
The Fourth in Paris will mark an epoch in
French and American history! A battalion of
American troops marching with the Star and
iiiifica in Hi uiuivuyiuaica is mvic man
a heartening message to a stricken people. It is
an assurance of ultimate victory guaranteed by
' representatives ot the world greatest democracy
How Coal Barons' Work
i Chkaf lavaatlntat Nam
" On the day following the Waldorf conference
of Pocahontas coal mine operators, January j,
!.Vt, W. R. J. Zimmerman, secretary of the
Smokeless Coal Operators' association, told the
jury trying these men and their companies for
conspiracy and violation of the sherman anti
trust law' that he prepared for the operators a
list of the immediate increases agreed upon. The
kinds of West Virginia coal affected and the
comparative, prices of the present year and last
as he prepared them are as tollows: Increase
V 1016. 1017. TVr Ton
, Run of filne, tidewater.... $3.00 , $470 $1.75
Lump, and egg. 1.60 3.75 2.15
Slack , 1.25 3.00 1.75
Run of mine, connecting
railways ,. 1.25
Lake lump and egg 1.70
Nut J.45
Pea , 1.25
1.75
2.05
Slack, lake...'... 1.15
2.05
1.75
3.00
3.75
3.50
3.00
3.00 1.85
Thus over night, after "inside" and "outside"
men got together and "fixed" the price, coa
jumped from 135 per cent! to 145 per cent higher
Mr. Zimmerman, however, tried to inform the
Jury that these rises in rates were td be put into
enect because ot the aire straits in which the
mine owners found themselves."
What were these dire straits? A 10 per cent
rise in wages had. been granted the miners and
spikes had gone up a little. Labor being paid
an average ot 51.65 a day. the 10 per cent in
crease added exactly 16 cents. Miners produce
on the average ten to fifteen tons a day, so that
the actual increase to the operator on each ton
ot coal was possibly 2 cents per ton. It was thi
situation, so Mr. Zimmerman told the jury, that
compeiiea mine operators 10 increase meir coai
Irom Sl.70 to per ton. - .
This week, one C M. Moderwell, another coal
operator hailing from Chicago, who, by the way
happens to be on the federal committee headed
.by rrancis s. 1'eabody. admitted quite distn
genuously before the senate investigating com
t mittee. when asked how he could justify such in
creases, that "the coal operator! are only human
like men engaged in other businesses, and they
have received the benehts onhe situation. Trans
lated in other words, the coal men raised prices of
coal to exorbitant figures simply because it was
an easy way to make easy money.
Why Not Call the Strike Off.
So' far as visible effects are concerned, the re
cent building trades strike in Omaha is a thing
of teh past. Practically all of, the workmen -who
were out are back on their jobs at acceptable
wages and, in most cases, on terms arranged
through their unions.
Yet thi, strike is still on, nominally, in one or
two lines, though to no purpose except to keep
up the tension and ill feeling.
Whenever wage4 workers have just cause or
real grievance, as against theiremployers. The
Bee will sympathize . with and support every
legitimate effort to uphold labor rights, but when
it becomes merely a tilt with windmills, the true
friend of the workers will advise them to desist
and make the best of the situation. Least satis
factory of all is fighting a labor controversy out
indefinitely in the courts because it only makes
fees for the lawyers to be paid with money earned
by the sweat of someone's brow. '
There is work ahead for all in Omaha and as
for the strike just forget it!
Race Riots at East St. Louis.'
Viewed from any angle, the race riots at East
St Louis are a most deplorable exhibition. Mob
spirit, in which the most brutal passions of man's
lower nature are loosed in insensate fury and un
restrained ferocity, was here manifest in its
worst phase. The outstanding feature of the
whole spectacle is the absolute failure of the
civil authorities to- meet the situation. Proper
exercise of pojice power should have served to
prevent the outbreak by nipping it in its incipi
ency. Those who are charged with this respon
sibility scarcely can plead ignorance of a condi
tion that has threatened for many days. Trouble
that culminated in riots a few weeks age had
only been smothered and not quenched and the
stupidest of police management would be blame
worthy did it not keep a watchful eye. on .such
a promising source of further disorder. A fearful
mVavma M...a4'Aaf am ttt. v mn urliA hair i fiy1ht
HJAigc iiiuat ttabj vit nib miiu ti,v
gently permitted to exist conditions making pos
sible the terribly disgraceful proceedings. The
underlying cause can only be dealt with by the
prudent, but determined, application of reason
able restraint and the enforcement of familiar
law. Racial antipathies should have no place
in our domestic affairs and East St. Louis is not
a locaj, but a national, source of shame at present.
Women and the War
I. Registration of Women
B y Fredric J. Hask in
Washington. July 1. National registration of
women is "the latest feature of our war program.
New York state has already made a military cen
sus of women as well as of men. and this step is
now being advocated for the whole country. It
is also being opposed by a tew conservatives, on
the grounds that it is unnecessary and expensive,
but registration will doubtless be made state by
state, if not by the national government.
The proposition is significant in more ways
than one. It is an official acknowledgment that
women are an important factor in the political
administration of the state. It appeals to the
sense of duty of the women as American citizens.
and, while some millions of them have as yet not
been conceded the vote, they are none the 'less
being called upon for service. And that latter
step is prophetic of future suffrage changes, if the
experience of England means anything.
In all parts ot the country the women have
mobilized for war work with the greatest of en
thusiasm. In thousands of towns and villages
they are sewing for the Red Cross, canning string
beans and apricots, and drying peas and corn
against the winter scarcity of Jood, while a tew
are already filling the places of men who have
left for military service.
Proverb for the Day.
Every man is his own doctor.
One Year Ago Today In the War.
Germans again captured Thiamont
field work, near Verdun.
French captured several villages in
drive toward Peronne.
Augustine Birrell, former chief sec
retary for Ireland, blamed by royal
commission for Irish revolt.
The manufacturers, of course, are in favor of
the registration of women so that they can pro
cure feminine labor. So far a large part of the
United States does not appear to realize what the
war will mean. There is too great a tendency to
believe that Germany is seriously threatened' by
its food shortage, and rapidly losing submarines
and territory. Our part of the war has begun,
but it is only a beginning. In a few weeks actual
conscription will begin, when, declare the manu
facturers, there is going to be great commercial
and industrial confusion.
Moreover, it is the belief of the manufacturers
that the war is going to last for a long time. Thus
many of them are already preparing to train large
numbers of women to take the place of enlisted
men. Feminine labor has proved exceptionally
satisfactory in Europe, despite many rumors to
the contrary. Over three million women are
working in the metal industries of Great Britain,
and a like number in those of France. "We will
require at least that many' additional women fac
tory workers before this war is over," was the
assertion of one manufacturer a few days ago.
Insurance or Pension for Soldiers?
The Council of National Defense is now. conT
sidering one of the important questions of the
war, what provision js to be made for the maimed I
or crippieu soiqicr or jnc acpcuucnia o mc uu.
The proposal that they .be insured is seriously
put forward, offered in lieu of the pension system.
One of the interested officers suggests the work
men's compensation act easily may, be broadened
to include the soldiers and sailors within its pro
visions. Insurance companies, while offering to
assist the 'government in carrying out any plan
it may finally adopt, are chary about assuming
any risk in the matter, only one making an offer
that might be considered a bid.
Insurance men realize more thoroughly than
the public what is involved in the suggestion and
none have expressed any desire to be allowed to
take over the prospective business. It is an en
tirety new field, in which their actuarial experi
ence would be useless at a guide. Moreover, un
less the rate was made exorbitant, it would cer
tainly mean insolvency for the company that
undertook to carry the risk. On the other hand,
the duty of providing for the soldier or his de
pendents is on the public entirely and ought not
to be considered otherwise. The people are fight
ing this war and should finance any plan of. re
lief that may be adopted.
Another factor that should have considerable
weight in final determination of the question is
that for the present at least care is being taken
to enlist the services of those only wfio have no
dependents. This may later be changed, but the
first draft will include none who leave behind
actual dependents. However, this should not op
erate to relieve the government of its liability
for pension, the provision being intended for
present and not for future protection.
About the only net result of the "bone dry"
fight in congress so far noted is that distillers
and brewers have been driven to buying ma
terial in anticipation of what may happen, thus
keeping up prices on grains. Food regulation
might now be a Tact if it had not been held back
by this division. Most people are more inter
ested in the groeer's bill just now than they are
in "moral" reforms. i -
Eighty-seven interned German' ships have been
added to the forces tightening the western sec
tion of the iron ring around the neck of "Furor
Teutonicus.,, On the eastern end the Russians
are tightening loose bolts for safety sake: In
thus taking up the slack the powers of democracy
generously adjust the ring to the diminished ra
tions of waning autocracy. More power to the
squeeze. . .
The work of women in time of war is divided
broadly into two classes social and economic.
The women of the working classes, deprived of a
masculine income, must enter the factory and
workshop in order to survive. Whether the
United States government will institute a pension
system for the dependents of soldiers, and how
much that pension will be, are questions still to
be determined, but in any event a large number
of women will have to enter industry to live. In
doing so they will be contributing to the economic
assets' of the nation. They will be manufacturing
the weapons of war.
The planting and preservation of food 'and the
prevention of waste also fall into the economic
class. Women are canning and drying and salt-
inir food this year, but their activities will be
nothing compared to those which will be neces
sary next year if the war continues, as all authori
ties agree it almost inevitably will. Next year will
have an advantage over this one, of course, in
that the women will not have to be persuaded and
taught. They will know how. There will also
be greater system in the prevention of waste.
Work of the social class is just as important as
that of the economic class, and needs to be just as
highly systematized. The Canadian women offer
a striking example of this.
Sewinsr classes must be organized to provide
clothing for our soldiers and their families. Work
of this sort has already been started by the Ked
Cross, but there is room for a great deal more of
it. Recreation must be provided in towns where
there are training camps a feature to which great
importance has been attached by the European
belligerents. There will be in ever-growing de
mand for women nurses.; And last, but not least.
it will be the duty of every woman to see that the
nation s childreri surfer as little as possible
Thus, in registerinsr her name with the state;
every woman should state the services for which
she is best fitted, together with her responsibili
ties, if any, which might interfere with their con
tribution. Whether she serves in a munition tac
tory, a Red Cross workshop, an army hospital, a
settlement center or on a recreation committee,
she will be doing her duty by the government a
duty which in Russia and England has already
been rewarded by the ballot. Probably very many
women would have voted against war, had they
been accorded the privilege, but ncw that it is
here, it is recognized as a great ieminme oppor
tunity. The situation is created. The rest is in
the hands ot the women. '
The Kultur of , Deceit
-Naw York World-
In Omaha Thirty Years Ago.
The Full Dress, a new saloon in the
court in the rear of the Custom
House, has Just been opened and By
rnn Dark and J. II. McTaeue will
receive their friends after 6 o'clock.
Charlie Swinkey, Jim Jones and
Sam Boston, three colored youngsters,
were badly burned by a premature ex
plosion of a sardine box full of pow
der with which they were packing a
The White Paper on "How the War Came to
Aiherica" is the record on which history will
weigh the blood-guilt of the German imperial gov
ernment in compelling the American people to
armed defense, r
It is a consistent record. Germany meant war
when she refused to enter into an arbitration
treaty with us. She meant war, ruthless war,
when at The Hague she blocked agreements for
ameliorating war, or for , making it unnecessary
by world courts. She meant war, the cruel war
on non-combatants which the submarines are
waging, when she issued her "peace note" last
December.
Appropriately dated a fortnight before Christ
mas to stir the passionate longing for peace of
men in the ranks, the vague German proposals
were accompanied by threats against neutrals,
especially the United States. These sinister con
ditions were no secret, though now first officially
described.
From a "thousand sources." the authoritative
recital runs, came warnings. "Unless the neutrals
used their influence to bring the war to an end.'on
terms dictated from Berlin," the "submarines
were to be unleashed." And though the Zimmer
mann disclosures came later, Washington already
knew how Berlin "had its agents at work both in
Latin America and Japan" to rouse anger against
us to the fighting pitch. Autocracy talked peace.
It plotted war.
And so conviction grew that "until the German
nation is divested of such rulers, democracy can
not be safe!" What a comment it is upon the
kultur of deceit that the very date of its "peace
note" was the time when Washington became at
last convinced that war was inevitable 1
Nebraska Press Comment
Kearney Hub: Omaha's police scandal may be
a great surprise to the people of Omaha, but it
is taken very much as a matter of fact by the
people of the state, who have been observing
Omaha conditions from, the outside for a good
many years. f ;
Franklin News: Omaha's gift to the Red
Cross totaled $251,252.49.' Omaha realizes the
good that the Red Cross does, as more than
$40,000 was spent by the Red Cross in Omaha
three years ago, following the destructive tornado
that visited the city. But Omaha usually returns
a gift with interest, and this is,another evidence
of the fact.
York Republican: Now comes The Omaha
Bee demanding in a loudaand racuous tone of
voice a "coalition cabinet." The Bee argues that
the European nations have all introduced that cus
tom since the war began, and it thinks this coun
try might profit by the example. , President Wil
son is certainly more apt to be moved by that
argument than by any other; he doU-s tn copying
Lngland but the coalition ot coniederat and
English-born statesmen who comprise his pres
ent cabinet i about the kind of coalition that
suits him best . .
miniature magazine at the corner of
Twelfth street and Capitol avenue. The
boys were helped into the drug store
of F. W. Fogg and their burns bathed
and attended to.
A little girl named Anna Wilson of
South Tenth street was knocked down
and bruised by one of the wagons in
the procession in front of the exposi
tion building. The little girl ran un
der the horses' feet to get some adver
tising cards lying pn the street.
, Seth Cole of the Olympic theater
was struck by a piece of cigar box
in which had been placed a firecracker
and In consequence carries a long
red seam across his face.
The pressmen, stereotypers and elec
trotypers made the most attractive dis
play in the parade, considering num
bers, and one young lady on the cor
ner of Sixteenth and Famam offered
a messenger boy a dollar to ascer
tain how mny of this craft were un
married. A committee is now offering
$10 for the photograph and address
of this same young lady.
The flag on Creighton college was
the first to kiss the breeze in that
section of the city on the Fourth.
Dr. A. S. Billings has returned after
a three months' vacation and is right
on the job again doing dental work
for Omahans.
This Day in History.
1796-First settlement on the West
ern Reserve begun at Conneaut, O.
1837 Cornerstone laid for the III
nois state capitol at Springfield.
1848 President issued a proclama
tion promulgating the treaty of peaco
between the United States and Mexico.
1851 "Maine law," an act "to pro
hibit drinking house and tippling
shops," enforced first at Bangor.
1863 Vicksburg surrendered to
Ceneral Grant.
1866 Emperor of Austria ceded
Venetla to France and invited the
French emperor's intervention with
Prussia.
1867 Cornerstone laid for the
Michigan soldiers' ' monument at De
troit. 1888 Monument to Francis Scott
Key unveiled in Golden Gate park,
San Francisco.
1892 Paterson. N. J., celebrated the
centennial of its settlement.
1894 The Hawaiian republic was
proclaimed.
The Day We Celebrate.
Prince Frederick William, eldest
son of the Prussian crown prince and
heir presumptive to the German im
perial throne, born eleven years ago
today.
Major Edward H. De AFmond, re
cently appointed a member of the
general staff of the United States
army, born in Missouri thirty-nine
years ago today.
George M. Cohan, celebrated actor,
playwright and manager, born at
Providence, R. I., forty years ago to
day. Clarence J. Owens; managing direc
tor of the Southern Commercial con
gress, born at Augusta, Ga., forty years
ago today.
John M. (Jack) Warhop, former
pitcher of the New York Americans,
now with the Baltimore International
league team, born at Hlnton, W. Va.,
thirty-three years ago today.
Timely Jottings and Reminders.
One hundred and forty-first anni
versary of the beginning of construc
tion of the Erie canal.
A total eclipse of the moon is
scheduled for tonight, but will not be
visible in any part of North America.
A new compulsory, insurance law,
applying to all workers except farm
laborers and domestic servants, comes
into effect today in New Jersey.
Secretary of War Baker and Sen
ator Wesley Jones of Washington are
to be among the Independence day
speakers in New York City today.
Major James E. Monroe, a son of
President James Monroe, will cele
brate his 101st birthday anniversary
today at his home in Richmond, Va.
Mme. Sarah Bernhardt is to deliver
a patriotic message ct the Independ
ence day exercises at Prospect park,
Brooklyn. It will be the first public
appearance of the famous French
actress since her recent illness.
Paris has made elaborate prepara
tions for a celebration of the American
Independence day. A leading feature
will be a reception at the American
embassy, to be attended by General
Pershing and the members of his
staff. ,
A great military demonstration and
historical pageant will be given today
at McPherson, Kan., in connection
with the unveiling of an equestrian
statue of General James B. McPher
son, in whose honor the town was
named.
7 jrr jk
NOTES OF WORLD WAR.
Storyette of the Day.
A learned counsel on the defend
ant's side lost his temper, as well as
his case, and remarked rudely to the
opposing lawyer: "Why do you so
often use the words 'also' and 'like
wise?' .They both mean exactly the
same, as far as I can see."
"By no means," said the other. 'I'll
show, you the difference by example.
Our learned friend the Judge is a
clever lawyer; you are a lawyer, also,
but not likewise." New York Globe.
WAKE UP. NEBRASKA!
Nebraska, aay you're ready (or any foreign
foe ;
Say your aim la rlrar and ateady, to Uncle
Sam will know.
He needs you now, Nebraka, aa he never
did bffor
Waka up, wake up, Nebraska, your Vncle
Sam's at war.
Nebraska, how'a your powder t la It
plentiful and dryT
tet uh hear a little louder, our Kebraaka'a
battle cry.
Once before they railed your aoldlera, when
the country was at war.
Are yu ready now, Nebraaka, to head the
call once more?
Tha fife and drum once thrilled you when
our nation needed men;
Old Glory waved, and filled yon with a
flahtlna sprit men..
One country, now, Nebraska, one flacworth
fighting for.
Waka up, wake up. Nebraska, your Uncle
Sam a at war.
Wakefield, Nebraska.,
It. D. A.
Vnrealtiy of Evil.
Omaha, July 3. To the Editor of
The Bee: In a recent communica
tion J. M. Holoday touches upon the
Christian Science philosophy of good
and evil as set forth in Mrs. Eddy's
writings and amplified by writers in
the various "Christian Science publi
cations. That the theologians have always
found the apparent presence of evil
a hard problem serves only to intro
duce the fact that until Mrs. Eddy
embodied the idea of evil as unreal,
as the only logical sequence flowing
from the accepted fact as to the all
ness of God, there never has been
anything but muddled thought about
evil.
Granting the theological dogma that
evil is as real as good, you are im
paled upon the horn of making God,
good, the author of evil, or the horn
of admitting a devil who has as much
capacity to create evil as God has to
create good. Satisfy those two propo
sitions or get rid of one of them, as
Christian Science does, and you elimi
nate the greater bulk of theological
writings, commentaries and creeds.
In the first chapter of the gospel of
St. John we read: "All things were
made by Him, and without Him was
not anything made that was made,"
and in the first chapter of Genesis we
find that "God saw everything that He
had made, and, behold? it was very
good."
As Christian Scientists we cannot
expect the public to demonstrate the
unrealitjl of evil, which is, in fact,
the supreme test and final proof de
manded by the teachings of Mrs.
Eddy, but we can ask the public to
consider if possibly there is not some
thing the matter with a system that
first invites us to believe that God
creates all things and that all that He
made is good, and then asks us to
believe In the reality of evil.
In order then to accept good and
evil as real we must contradict the
scriptures that God's creation is good
as well as deny that God made all
things.
Men and women of culture and
sound judgment have found a soul
satisfying haven in the Christian
Science teachings as to the unreality
of evil and it is our only purpose to
invite such as so desire to investigate
for themselves that perchance they,
too, may find the scriptures illumi
nated as well as harmonized.
CARL E. HERRING.
The howitser is the modern representa
tive of the mortar, being! a short, light fun,
eapable of firing' a heavy shell at low
velocity.
Officers of the United States marin
corps, in relation to rank and pay. are oa
the aame basis aa officers of similar rank
in Ue United States army.
A century ago several Americans began
the building of a aubmarinc boat with as
idea of using it in an attempt to rescue
Napoleon from St. Helena.
Cordite, the explosive used in many of
the most powerful guns, is a mixture of
nitroglycerine and gun-cotton, with a small
percentage of vasseline.
One of the first submarines constructed
by John P. Holland, waa built in 18S1 .on
order of the Fenian .brotherhood, which
hoped to destroy with it the British navy.
Robert Fulton waa building a large)
armored submarine that was to carry a
silent engine and a crew larger than that
carried by the largest submarine of today,
when hia plans were frustrated by his death
in 1815.
The first army Hospital in this country
was established at Cambridge, Mass., soon
after the battle of Bunker Hill, and was
placed in charge of Dr. John Warren; a
brother of the illustrious General Joseph
Warren. ,
Wonders About Mlckcl.
Omaha, July 3. To the Editor of
The Bee: "There ain't no such ani
mal." I'A. B. Mickel" is a name in
fiction, a mythical form whose mythi
cal sustenance must be absorbed
through automatic, . involuntary, lazy
functions and consist of ugly things
not of this earth. Does It breathe?
Then poisonous gases may be used for
its irJation.
And to think "it" got into Collier's
or Into The Bee even for the amuse
ment and shame of our good little
Omaha.
Or Is Mickel the stage name of some
clever humorist successfully joking
with us? Wouldn't it be splendid if
this were so, in order that we might
not have to sympathize so genuinely
and cordially with Mrs. Mickel and
all the Mickelettes. Bah!
DISGUSTED.
SUNNY GEMS.
I.ady Reformer Don't yeu know, you
unfortunate man, that liquor la a destroyer?
Boozy Bill Dore's one t'Ing it don't de
stroy, lady me thirst for it. Boston Tran-acrlpt.-
"Generalf the enemy are upon us. Shall
ws. give them battle or retreat?"
"Don't bother me with such questions,"
-snapped the Senator turned soldier. "Sub
mit it to a referendum. Baltimore American.
"Does your office girl aeem to catch on
as boy wouid?"
"Practically, yea. She doesn't smoke
cigarettes, but she has become Interested in
baseball and learned to whistle." Detroit
Free Press.
F M MUSBrVW CATOS ME W
1WE ACT HnW0iqr
TfcOUSm POCVvS,VNHAY
- MRS CVWlfittr
t9W rr - HE WAS no ,
"You farmers buy a good many gold
bricks, eh?" '
"Yes. and you city fellers buy a good
deal of swamp land. I guess thinga are
about even.' Louisville Courier-Journal.
Bacon Has your college conferred a de
gree on you since you left It?
Egbert It has not, and I don't want any
more.
f'What do you mean?"
"I got enough. I got , the third degree
while at college." Yonkera Statesman.
"How many people were in the city at
the time It was overwhelmed by the flood?"
"That was hard to estimate on account
of the large floating population." Balti
more American.
Vin Putter There ia one good thing
about golf.
De Orowche Well, I'm glad to know it,
but I don't care to hear what it la. Judge.
Physician Your case Is such, madam,
that 'time alone will effect a cure.
Mrs. Randall Then It Is hopeless, for I
never have even five minutes. Life.
"Dear one," he murmured, "do you love
me yet?"
A shiver shook the beautiful co-ed'a frame
and she waa silent.
"Speak, dearest; answer me," he Insisted.
"Do you love me yet?"
"Yes, George, I love you; but your gram
mar Is rotten." Boston Transcript.
LOUIS CHEVROLET
wear t
AIR POCKET GOGGLES
On sale at the Speedway and
Downtown.
Good Health
good appetite, good' spirits
mean no discord in the body.
To keep the organs in har
monywhen there is need use
BEECKAM'S
PILLS
Largest Sale ef Aay Madkbe tm the World.
SoU everywhere, la boast. 10 25c,
L 0 j
Lips Half An Inch
From the Telephone
When You Talk
Keep your lips not less
than half an Inch or more
than an inch from the mouth
piece when you telephone.
Then speak slowly and
very distinctly, directly into
the telephone.
If the telephone is farther
than an inch from the mouth
it will be difficult to transmit
clearly such sounds as "b, p,
d, t, f,
If the telephone is 'closer
than half an inch,, nasal
sounds like "m" and "a" will
not enter
properly.
the transmitter
In making a -call always
listen to the operator's repe
tition of the number. Ac
knowledge it by aaying
"Right" if correct. If wrong
aay "No" and gire it again.
Drug Store
News 1
Satisfaction in quality satis
faction in price all around sat
isfaction that's what you get at
the Eexall Drug Stores. Buying
for five big, progressive stores
means quantity hence price
concessions from manufacturers,'
which we pass on to our patrons.
Ever changing stocks assure the
freshest of drugs and drug sun
dries. "You can save time and
money by trading at the five
Rexall Drug Stores."
Sherman & McConnell
Drug Co.
Five Good Drug Stores
Out of a wide experience we offer
funerals whose heautiful dignity and
superb equipment appeal to those who
are about to arrange a burial service.
We will see that the appointments are
correct and that an unostentatious
dignity will pervade the entire burial
service. We have correspondents through
out the land.
N. P. SWANSON
Funeral Parlor. (Established 1888)
17th and Cuming Sta. Tel. Doug. 1040
.iliiiiiliil:tl!il:il!iiiliil;iliil;il!!Mlili:ii::liiinliiliilil"tiil,l
I Our ?
Fireproof
1 Warehouse i
I Was Built to
meet all the requirements. It f
gives you absolute protection
for your household goods at a s
reasonable cost.
Separata Locked Rooms
Piano Rooms, Silver Vault, etc.
- m
: Omaha Van
I & Storage Co. f
Phone Dougtas 4163
806-818 South 16th St.
l-lliflrllHi'li !i'iliiiiiHi:i:!'lHliHiH!ili!iilllll::in
' THE OMAHA BEE INFORMATION BUREAU
Washington. D. C
Enclosed find a two-cent stamp, for which you will please send me,
entirely free, a copy of The Canning Book.
Name
Street Address
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