Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, August 13, 1916, EDITORIAL, Image 14

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    2 C
THE OMAHA SUNDAY BEE: AUGUST 13. 1916.
THE OMAHA SUNDAY FEE
Founded by"edward"rosewater;
vicfoRRoskw aterTkditor.
Tt II SiMtahin i'.infT livirr
fcKK hi n.niNii. farx am am rk r.vTKrvrft"
.Suitrrt tt Omaha pc-Moffio a Mvnt ilw mU.
Terms of si'BsruirTtoN.
I'o orri Bf tnntl
IVOlf tad Mt.1m V ef
Pally WlUlt Sllll.Ht. 4.V lfl
a!n iit Kiu;Ui tiV id
rvfninj! wtliwu! Sjrt.t ;'V 4 M
PunrU- Ho ,v,!t .V ? '(
fill) rut Miin.Ui tUv M r.r tn .i1i.- UN
Swiil iiiit'." .(!!(. ' ! t'rn or irtor: ,r 'l.i In
llflimi to Ontal.a ir ;i'(..n lrfimi'.l
REMITTANCE.
Iw.ll t tlr.f
,10.1 1
I'er
i.i .-tir
H; : r'l. Vain n
; i.'it; HuiMtnf
.k R.-:i i.m; Fifth
CORRESPONDENCE.
HUY CIRCULATION
57,569 Daily Sunday 52,382
;:bii rifviiUn.'ii ni.i.i.r ft TTi. B
lul. t-rlhfi .lull w'ni mi Ih.t Ui.
.f Jul. 1IM6. M
n.t
PWI.iHT WUl.UMh i,ltvilll..n M.nM.r
Si;b-nt In 1111 v,,i,-r .ml ,.m tn lfra n
th;. S.I (Ut Aiku!. IfllA
RtUlkllT HI ml N.H.rr VMP.
Sub.rHb.r. iMvIni th. city temporarily
thcuta h.v. Th. Bn mtiltd to th.m. Ad
dr. lll b chantod ft.n r.qu..t.d.
Sunday is
safely first.
a good day to practice
The master bakers started some
thing when tliey began to talk about
10-ceut bread.
Now that the summer climate has
got steadied down to business aren't
you glad you live in Nebraska?
More automobile accidents come
from one car trying to pass another
thin from my other single source.
Don't be reckless.
"Billy" Sunday will find Omaha's
skyline changed a little, but every
thing else is about the same as when
he first hit town list fall.
If the fallen walls of that old Capi
tol hotel at Lincoln could only talk
several forever hidden chapters of
Nebraska history would be disclosed.
Omaha will be very glad to have
both Mr. Hughes and Mr. Wilson
here, and neither will have any occa
sion to complain of the welcome.
Down on the border the news that
Wilson is going to settle on Carran
z's terms ought to be welcome news.
But then, they're down there to get
hardened.
It isn't fair, even for a corre
spondent who doesn't sign his name
to remind the city commissioners of
promises piade when they were out
for votes. '
No newspaper reader fails to get
more than bis money's worth, regard
less of the enforced economy of
white paper holding down the num
ber of pages.
Having absorbed all the altitude
there is in this state, the Nebraska
editors home from their excursion
ought to be hitting high spots for
some time to come.
The Turk decline, to allow Uncle
Sam to assist in feeding the Christians
cooped up in Syria, saying the crops
are plenty. He might have added there
are not so many mouths to feed as
last year.
' ffta desperate emergency that free
Missouri river bridge between Omaha
and Council Bluffs might be accom
plished by corraling one of the pon
toon bridges now being used over in
Europe when they go into the discard.
It was the democratic caucus that
- adopted the proposed intendment to
include lower incomes in the ta
schedule, not the "reactionary repub
licans," as is being alleged by hyster
ical defenders of the administration.
No course is too desperate for a dem
ocrat just now.
i
.
Purchase of the Danish West Indies,
Ratification of the treaty ceding
the Danish West Indies to the United
States is not to be accomplished with
out some debate, both In Washington
and Copenhagen. In Denmark opposi
tion has already developed and the
consent of the Rigsdag to the treaty
is by no means assured. The economic
condition of the kingdom is by no
means so critical as at the outset of
the war; in fact, some Danish econo
mists assert that Denmark will soon
be a loaning instead of a borrowing
nation. Under such conditions, the dis
posal of its holdings in American
waters is not immediately urgent.
The suggestion that the sale is
brought about under pressure has
been indignantly resented by all par
ties. In the lower house of the Rigs
dag, where the liberals and socialists
predominate, the bill to ratify the
treaty bids fair to pass, although the
socialists propose sending it to the
country for a referendum vote. In the
upper bouse the opposition is more
formidable, and may develop suf
ficient influence to defeat the proposal.
What is back of the movement to
thwart the sale can only be conjec
tured, although it may easily be as
cribed to the intense national feeling
that has revived not alone in Den
mark, but in all the Scandinavian
countries since the beginning of the
war.
In the United States, the general
feeling is, as it has always been, in
favor of the purchase of the islands.
Every reason, from the perpetuation
of the Monroe doctrine through all
the range of political and economic
expediency supports the move, but its
consummation depends on the Danes.
School for Motherhood.
When Mrs. rainier bequeathed a million dollars
to found a "school tor motherhood," she was
actuated by the highest of motives it was her
own mother-heart, yearning for humanity and
the future that must have inspired her to make
the bequest. It is a sad commentary, though, on
our people that such an institution should be
thought necessary, even by an old lady who
looked with sorrow on the frivolity of the day.
! otlici liond h.is m all tunes been considered
woman's crown of glory; some great tueu have
licit! it to he her supreme iiiuction. Wonuitl her
self has so esteemed it. ami no experience of the
race can he cited to prove that they have given
over this divine prerogative. Individuals, for
reasons of their own. lure denied themselves the
pangs ,iml joys of Itnugmg forth children, hut
thev have not altered the course of nature.
The ijtjrstiou is. does the future of the race re
quire that woman he especially trained for the
t ercise of motherhood. Lugenists will give af
tirniative answer, but is their theory the soundest?
The proposed estahlislmient of the superman has
not as yet shown such form as to attract the en
thusiastic support of many. Man has steadily ad
vanced through unnumbered years, each genera
tion setting its mark a little ahead of its prede
cessor, yet certain traits have persisted from the
earliest recorded experience of the race. One of
these has to do with the selection of a mate, a
simple enough process when put into practice,
hut one which has so far eluded the solution of
the most profound of investigators. Who knows,
any more than did Solomon, "the way of a man
with a maid?" Courtship and marriage defy
rules, and out of these come motherhood, and
the men and women who make the world go
ahead.
(iirls deserve to be taught certain fundamentals,
and so do hoys, but opinion is still divided as to
how this instruction shall be imparted, and the
preponderance is yet in favor of the home as the
place where the foundation for future responsi
bilities properly should be laid.
Good of the Tractor Show.
The tractor show, just over at Fremont, has
been most successful, viewed from any angle. A
week of splendid exhibitions by the makers of
their big farm engines is reported to have at
tracted 00,000 visitors, all sincerely interested in
farm machinery. Practical men inspected all the
machines, shown in competition under working
conditions, and on the judgment thus made up
rests the prosperity of the makers. It is a good
thing for the builders, whose confidence in their
own product is strengthened by the experience
thus obtained. Comparison gives them a better
understanding of what is required of the tractor
in farm service, as well as the individual ideas and
notions of the men they must please in order to
sell. Prospective purchasers learn which machine
is better adapted to their individual needs, and
buy with first-hand knowledge of what to ex
pect. The whole affair is an excellent example
of the modern way of bringing buyer and seller
together tinder advantageous conditions. The
prestige of the Fremont tractor show is firmly
established now, and its continuance assured.
What Mr. Hughes Will Do.
Mr. Hughes' present tour is marked by one
significant feature, the plain statement of a
definite policy to be pursued when he becomes
president. He has left no doubt as to his views
on pertinent points of government, especially
plain being his pledges as to protection to be
given Americans wherever they may be. His
views on citizenship are frankly set forth, and
are such as distinguish him as a patriotic citizen,
with an intense devotion to the principles and
ideals of our government. He has not at any time
proposed to tear down, but to build up and de
velop. The policy of protection for American
industries is a republican fundamental, and to it
he stands committed. Hut he has made definite
pledges on other points. One of them is that he
will end "pork barrel" legislation. He will not
tolerate such abuses of the civil service law as
have been practiced under the present regime.
It is of far more importance to know what he
proposes to do than to discuss what he might
have done. His record as governor of New York
is guaranty that he is not lacking in executive
firmness or initiative. That he has carried out his
promises in the past is warrant for thinking he
will redeem the pledges' he is now making. Roose
velt and Wilson have provided ample precedent
for the president to proceed in putting a definite
program through congress, and each pledge that
Mr. Hughes makes will be redeemed.
Duty as Well as Privilege.
The experience of the army in its present ef
forts at recruiting is not such as to convince the
observer that the American people fully under
stand what is really involved. The volunteer sys
tem is again on trial, and again is being proved a
failure. Men who are available for the service in
differently decline to take part in the process
whereby they might acquire a working knowledge
of the soldier's trade. Training is imperatively
necessary for soldiers; we must have soldiers if
we are to have efficient national defense, and
we must be able to defend ourselves if we are
to maintain a respectable place in the world.
The soldiers must come from the sturdy men of
the nation, but efforts to interest them under the
present system has not brought satisfactory re
sults. The many are content to allow the few to
assume a responsibility that rests on all. It is
a duty as well as a privilege to serve one's coun
try in any capacity. Free institutions will not en
dure if the citizens avoid their duty, just now
the strongest argument for universal military ser
vice in the United States comes from the unan
swered appeals for volunteers.
Dairy Products and the War.
One of the minor factors in the foreign trade
of the last year was that of dairy products. While
the total doesn't loom large in comparison with
the aggregate, only $24,000,000 as alongside of
some six and a half billions, it is significant as
showing the possibilities of the United States as
a producer of milk and the foods that are made
from milk. In 1913 our exports of dairy products
were valued at $3,000,000, while our imports
amounted to almost $10,750,000. The last year saw
but a slight decrease in the value of the imports,
but an enormous increase in the exports. Much
of the total increase is accounted for by the sale
of condensed milk and cream abroad, this having
risen from $1,900,000 in 1913 to $12,500,000 in
1916. That the war is directly accountable for
this is admitted, but it is that much of an addition
to the share of the American farmer in the busi
ness created by the war.
i TODAY
Thought Nugget for the Day.
Napoleon was the most effective man in mod
ern times. The secret of his character was that
while his plans were more vast, more various,
more difficult than those of other men, he had
Ihe talent to fill them up with perfect promptness.
-Horace Itushncll.
One Year Ago Today in the War.
Prince I eopold took possession of Siedlce and
liernians gained slowly in southern and central
I 'oland.
Petrograd reported a repulse of the Germans
in the Mitau region.
Thou;.ari,s ol Armenians reported to have been
slaughtered by the Kurds and Turkish Irregulars.
This Day in Omaha Thirty Years Ago.
Frank K. Morrissey, associate editor of the
Herald, and mother, have gone to San Francisco
on a vacation tour.
Hon. Charles II. Brown and wife and Miss
Hrown have left tor Lake Superior for a short
perioil of listless leisure in the great northwest.
Mr. L. E. Kobhins of Kansas City, formerly a
resident of Council Bluffs, is visiting in Omaha
as guest of Captain G. M. Bailey of the R. M. S.
The annual Douglas County Teachers' institute
will be conducted by James B. Bruner, county
superintendent, assisted by Mrs. Jennie Ellis
Keysor, Miss Mary Strong and Mr. H. E. Grum
as instructors.
Lylc Dickey and Harry Jordan have gone to
Denver on a vacation trip.
(iround is being broken for a new Catholic
church on the corner of Leavenworth and Vir
ginia avenue. The building will be of brick with
stone and terra cotta trimmings, to cost about
$20.(XXi. Rev. R Iloyle, late of Fremont, Neb.,
will be pastor. The committee who have been
assisting Rev. Boyle are Messrs. Gibbon, Mc
Shane. Linihan and Dellone.
Henry Kaufman, the Douglas Street liquor
man, who has been in Europe for sometime back,
has telegraphed from Chicago that he is on his
way home.
The Day We Celebrate.
Duke of Teck, elder brother of Queen Mary of
England, born in Kensington palace, forty-eight
years ago today.
Emma Frames, famous operatic prima donna,
born of American parentage at Shanghai, China,
forty-nine years ago today.
Count Herman Wrangel, the present Swedish
minister to England, born fifty-nine years ago
today.
Dr. Felix Adler, noted educator and lecturer
on political and social ethics, born at Alzey, Ger
many, sixty-five years ago today.
General Isaac R. Sherwood, representative in
congress of the Ninth Ohio district, born at Stan
ford. N. Y eighty-one years ago today.
Harry L. Gandy, representative in congress of
the Third South Dakota district, born at Cheru
busco, Ind., thirty-five years ago today.
Edwin Grasse, celebrated violin virtuoso, born
in New York City, thirty-two years ago today.
Brigadier General John L. Clem, U. S. A., re
tired, who was the last civil war veteran on the
active rolls of the United States army, born at
Newark, O., sixty-five years ago today.
I'rof. Morris Jastrow of the University of
Pennsylvania, born in Europe, sixty-five years ago
today.
John A. Peters, representative in congress of
the Third Maine district, born at Ellsworth, Me.,
fifty-two years ago today.
Fielder A. Jones, manager of the St. Louis
American league base ball club, born at Shingle
House, Pa., forty-five years ago today.
Mind Your P's and Q's.
It would be a curious thing, if they could be
traced out, to ascertain the origin of half the
quaint old sayings and maxims that have come
down to the present time from unknown genera
tions. Who, for example, was "Dick" who had
the odd looking "hat-band" and who has so long
been the synonym or representative of oddly
acting people? Who knows anything authentic
of the leanness of "Job's turkey," who has so
many followers in the ranks of humanity? Scores
of other sayings there are, concerning which
similar questions might be asked. Who ever
knew, until comparatively late years, what was
the origin of the cautionary saying, "Mind your
P's and Q's?" A modern antiquarian, however,
has put the world right in relation to that saying.
In ale houses, in the olden time, when chalk
"scores" were marked upon the wall, or behind
the door of the tap room, it was customary to put
the initials "P" and "Q" at the head of every
man's account, to show the number of pints and
quarts for which he was in arrears; and we may
presume many a friendly rustic to have tapped
his neighbor on the shoulder when he was in
dulging too freely in his potations, and to have
exclaimed, as he pointed to the chalk score, "Mind
your P's and Q's, man I mind your P's and Q's I"
The writer from whom we glean this informa
tion mentions an amusing incident in connection
with it which had its origin in London, at the
time a "Learned Pig" was attracting the attention
of half the town. A theatrical wag, who attended
the porcine performances, maliciously set before
the four-legged actor some peas a temptation
which the animal could not resist, and which im
mediately occasioned him to lose the "cue" given
him by the showman. The pig-exhibitor remon
strated with the author of the mischief on the un
fairness of what he had done; to which he re
plied, "I only wanted to ascertain whether the
pig knew his 'peas' from his 'cues'!"
This Day in History.
1803 By the treaty of Vincennes, the Kaskas
kias ceded the most of southern Illinois to the
United States.
1817 President Monroe, with Governor Cass
and Generals Brown and Macomb, paid a visit to
Detroit.
1839 Michael A. Corrigan, third Roman Cath
olic archbishop of New York, born at Newark N
J. Died in New York City, May 5, 1902.
1846 Americans, under Commodore Stockton
and Major Fremont, captured Los Angeles.
1851 Cuba was again invaded by Lopez and
a party of American filibusters.
1868 One of the greatest earthquakes on
record began in Peru and Ecuador and in three
days destroyed many cities and towns in those
countries.
1869 Adolph Niel, marshal of France, for
whom the Marshal Niel Rose was named, died
in Pans. Born October 4, 1802.
1870 Admiral of French fleet near Heligoland
declared north German coast in state of blockade
1887 Arrival of Prince Ferdinand at Sofia
after his election as prince of Bulgaria.
1890 First annual convention of letter car
riers of the United States met in Boston.
1898 Manila surrendered to the American
forces after a short land fight and bombardment
by the fleet.
Storyette of the Day.
"I've got an awfully witty wife," boasts Solo
mon Beach. "I get most of my good stuff from
her. to tell you the truth. Sometimes, though,
her wit is a bit too sharp for comfort. Now, the
other evening I came home feeling sort of mean.
I had a corn that was raising thunder with me
and I wasn't in the best of humor. Well, I came
limping up the walk, and my wife stood at the
door, eyeing me suspiciously.
What makes you walk so funnv," she said.
rSr" ' 1 snaPPfl1 grouchily.
'Oh, ' she said, turning awav, "I thought may
be it w4s rye '"Cleveland Plain Dealer.
By victor Sosswatsr.
I HAVE put in practically a whole week tour
ing northwestern Nebraska along with the edi
torial excursion of the State Press association and
like every one without previous ocular experi
ence, have had my eyes opened to the wonderful
possibilities of a region put down until within a
very few years as a barren waste unfit for culti
vation or habitation. We have been talking "See
America First." when as a matter of fact we
would do better to preach "See Nebraska First,"
at least to Nebraskans vitally concerned in the
development of our own state, hew of us realize
that we go 1111 in the air. altitudiually speaking.
I over 3,000 feet without leaving the state when we
' fr.itii tif .atrn tn th(" western hoilnl:i r v
and almost as few have any adequate idea of the
magnificent distances covered in such a journey
Hut I am not going to "write up" the trip, be
cause it can not possibly be done in even the most
cursory way in the space of a column, but a few
impressions and thoughts gamed during the out
ing may interest my readers.
What struck me forcibly was the change in
the character of both town ano country as com
pared with what I had seen on another excursion
of Nebraska editors that I had taken up the
Burlington line as far as Newcastle, Wyo., twen
ty-five years ago. While an occasional sod house
survives here and there, then it was largely dug
outs that housed the people, outside of the few
little hamlets that boasted of railroad stations, as
contrasted with the fine modern farm houses and
town residences all over that country today.
Nearly every place where we stopped on that
early excursion trip conformed to the same type:
A wooden shed depot and a few store buildings
and dwellings clustered about four to six squares,
with a public well in the center of the intersecting
streets from which all the inhabitants drew all of
the water used for all purposes. Now the loca
tion of the smallest village is sighted at a dis
tance by the steel water tank that furnishes a
gravity pressure supply to every householder,
who also enjoys the use of electric light and tele
phone, and all the luxuries ot civilization, not to
mention owning an automobile. The barns and
feeding pens, the abundance of cattle and hogs
and poultry, the widely cultivated fields, thick
with stacks of cut grain or hay, practically all
the land under fence, all this notes the transfor
mation that has taken place.
The people out here today look upon them
selves as pioneers and they are in truth pioneer
ing a new country, but the burdens and hardships
they have to bear are as nothing beside those of
the dug-out period to which I refer. The new
comers of today have to put up with but few
discomforts, yet have far greater opportunities
and much more certainty of winning out. They
have churches and schools for their children, en
terprising merchants in town to supply their
needs, live home newspapers, regular railroad
service and daily mails, circuses, movies,
dances, country fairs, base ball, athletic tourna
ments, all in season. The dreariness and lone
someness of pioneering have completely disap
peared. A cash prize has been offered for the best
printed description of what we saw in the irri
gated vallty surrounding Gering and Scottsbluff.
I may submit this hastily constructed alphabetic
alliteration:
Alfalfa and altitude and auto array,
Big beets bordered by beautiful buttes, bees,
butter,
Cud chewing cattle, coming chief cities,
Drouth-destroying ditches doing duty diurnal.
Ever endeavoring, each entertaining,
Faucets fast flowing from
Great, generous, gracious
Hospitality's hoard; huntsman's heaven, hurt
ling horses,
Irrigation incessant inciting its
Just jubilation.
Kindness, knowledge,
Love's labor learning. Level land
Midst mighty mounds,
Nature nowhere nobler.
Onions on onions, ominous oracles of
Prodigious potatoes; precious poultry; people
patriotic, pushing.
Quick, querulous, quizzical;
Roads running right
Smooth, straight, secure; sheep, swine send
ing skyward
Their triumphant title to
Uphold unmeasurable
Value verily vaunted. Visitors
Welcomed with winning ways;
Xtra
Yields yet yearn your
Zeal.
In due time, if not already, the most enthu
siastic good roads boosters of all are to be found
among the western Nebraska people. In that
land of what I call magnificent distances, the im
perative need of good roads is being driven in all
the time. Everybody hikes by auto and the inter
change of travel and traffic between the towns is
tremendous. They are discovering the high cost
of bad roads and learning the difference between
poor roadways and good ones. They are realiz
ing the false economy of make-shift bridges and
culverts, the danger of sharp curves, and the loss
entailed by steep grades. Their experience is
teaching them that the condition of the roads is
a factor in marketing their farm products and
that the cost of hauling comes out of the price
received from the sale. The roads are not had.
As natural roads with little or no working,
they should be rated good; they have the making
of excellent highways, but they call urgently for
improvement.
Another enforced lesson of the trip heightens
regard for the boundless hospitality and the sin
cere welcome extended to strangers by the public
spirited people throughout the interior of Ne
braska. Perfect strangers, as well as friends,
undertook to make us feel completely at home
and to impress us that our entertainment was a
privilege to them instead of a favor to us. Inci
dentally I could not help remark upon the re
sourcefulness that enabled them to take care of
an invading army of 150 guests as if alwrays in a
state of preparedness for that very thing. At one
place the slaughter of the chickens seemed so
appalling that one luckless editor ventured the
remark, "I'm afraid you'll have to get along all
next winter without eggs," whereupon the gentle
matron, who was waiting on the table, retorted,
"Why, you ought to know that the roosters don't
lay the eggs."
The newspaper bunch of Nebraska is also im
proving. Editors, like folks in other professions,
have to improve all the time to keep up with the
procession. These editorial excursionists measure
up well above the average, none smaller than
body type and lots of them in big face sizes.
They have the outward appearance, too, of in
dependence and self-assertion, of being their own
bosses, of taking their 'job seriously and main
taining respect for it, full of fun and joviality with
out the boisterous rudeness that a junket some
times brings out. Perhaps the wives and children
are entitled to part credit for the exceptional be
havior if so, let wives and children attend the
meetings regularly.
Absence from the city kept me from attend
ing the funeral of the late John M. Thurston as a
token of respect to a man who has made Ne
braska history and whom Nebraska honored with
a commission to represent the state in the na
tional senate. I may later have some remi
niscent comment suggested by his passing.
The American insists that Baltimore was on
the map long before the Deutschland arrived.. It
is still on the man. Let it go at that.
SECULAR SHOTS AT PULPIT.
Cleveland Plain Dealer: A local clerity
man mfrti that Darwin ii to blame for the
war in Europe. And every time a child falls
down and bumps his nose, Is it Newton's
fault?
Baltimore American: A Cleveland minis
ter declared lately that Churlea Darwin is
ti blame for the war, as his theory of evo
lution made the German believe themselves
a race of supermen. It is rather hard at this
late day to try and make a monkey of the
unfortunate Bcientii-t.
SprinRfleld Itepublioan: Dr. Fitch, presi
dent of the Andover theoionical seminary,
t'll a conirronation in New York that work
inn people have a right to trrt recreation and
rt'laxHtiim on Suiuliiy, but "We whn are bet
ter cimimtaiu'ed have to keep Sunday in
other ways." Some of the "better circum
stanced" seem to claim the privilege of the
workinn classes in this renpect. Perhaps
thHt is becaurte they, too, work six days a
week.
Rrooklyn Eairle: The Rt. Rev, Snmuel D.
1'erpiifion, first man of his race to be made
11 hUhop by the Protestant Kpirieopul church,
who died the other day at Monrovia, Liberia,
IhmiKh a neRro, and horn in South Carolina,
was never a slave. Mis parents were free
persona of color. He was ti yer.rs old when
they accepted the inviting offers of the Na
tional Colonization society, and went to Li
beria, lie was educated in the mission school
of the Episcopalians at Cape Palmas,
DOMESTIC PLEASANTRIES.
"What's th trouble with Three Finger
Sam? He looka worried"
"He Is." replied Uroneho Dob. "He'a get
hlsself an automobile. If he taken aoveral
drinks he knows he can't run the thtnic
and If h don't tako 'cm he's afraid to try."
Washington ttar.
"4And has your dnutr liter's course In do
mestic science Interested her any In the
housework ?"
"To som extent. Occawlonally she con
descends to show her mother wherein her
old-fashioned methods are all wrong;."
Boston Transcript.
MV TAKE ME
0NW To TrlH MOMIES-H0W CAN
I BREAK HIM OF THE NABIf ?
Rosalia skoorkv
fel&Ct TIMB HE TAKES W
lb A MOM IF SHOW, INSIST ON
SrmMi THROUGH "THE PICJORES
TWICE!
5w n
I man. It took a strontr wrench for me to
d-'ts.'h myself from my ambitions.
I She Possibly a monkey wrenchT Baltt
; more American.
! Plack I know a man who ha oaueM
more blots to be east on fieneral Washlng
I ton than I could possibly say.
White Who la tho fellow?
I Kliick Ho runs the cancelling machine
1 In tlie pontofflce. Judy.
' "There wna a chap just In her looking
for you, wmith."
"Uas ho tall or short 7"
; "Until."
: "What do you mean?"
"He was a tall man and he said he wanted
to borrow a dollar." Louisville Courler-
Journal.
I TlRchelor (Sillily) I dreumed last night
that I wus murrl.'d. The ularm clock wolce
' Uie
IlnMlft (more sadly) I dreamed last
niKht I was single. The twins woke me.
, Huffalo News.
Flatbtish I see In Rueslft there la ft
heavy penalty for putting a declaration of
love on a postal card.
llfnuiinhurM What In the penalty? Mar
r in (re. V 0 11 k era .Statesman.
"P!d you ever take, any Interest in aa-
trolopy ?
"No." replied tho matter-nf-faot man. "I
fan it. 'fount for all the hard luelt and tem
peramental peculiarities I care to by condi
tions right heru on this earth." Washing
tun Star.
Mrs Hiram Of fen Supposing Bridget, I
deduct from ynur wagta tho cost of all the
dishes you broke?
ilrbtget Shure, mum, In that case It's
menelfd bo like the diwli. Boston Transcript
He n Is true, I went Into business In
deferenro to my parents" wish, but I could
have made a brilliant succewa as a public
A MAID TO A MAN.
St. Louis Globe-Democrat.
You think thHt T would not be glad to wait
And help you work to earn your youthful
way.
I heard you say. "Today the girls expect
A man to have his fortune
When he atarta.
She will not help him
Work to win."
I cannot tell you that my one dealr
In tn assist you In your alms
And that I'd love you a thousandfold
If you would fomo
And prove your love of me
By asking mo to share what you have now
I cannot tell you; I ain not a man;
But I can wait
And work atone for you,
Am you' would work for me, and when our
time has com
We'll meet on level ground.
If you should take me now
My energies would live for you;
I'd bend my thought, my hand and ray en
deavor That you might well sueceed.
Bui now you work alone
And I
Perforce shall do the same.
And we shall have twofold success
Whii you have come to claim me.
UIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!
Protection?
Government LclX fL2lu"h.
The Woodmen of the Worldl
S Deals with the foundation of all government.
Protection of the Home 1
s Patriotic citizens think first of this. That's why nearly a million 5
of the country's best citizens are members of this society.
E And that's why S
The Woodmen of the World 1
is the
Leading Fraternal Insurance Society
Ring Douglas 1117 No charge for explanation.
J. T. VATES, Secretary. W. A. FRASER, President.
Tillllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllillllilllllllili
V,
4 Years
At 1324
Farnam St.
a ..atv m . ..w eaV
I TEETH
A SPECIAL,
We Please
You or Re
fund Your
Money.
DR. McKEflNEY SAYS:
"You all know me I've been here over 4 years and
have the largest dental practice in the city the result of
honest service and fair prices."
Beit Silver FA.
Filling 0UC
Wonder Plate!
worth $15 to $25.
Be.t 22k fl
Gold Crown .yt
Heaviest Bridge J
Work, per tooth,
$5.00, $8.00 and $10.00
MEMO DENTISTS
Hours: 8:30 A.
M. to 6 P. M.
Wednesdays
and Saturdays
Till 8:00 P. M.
Not Open
Sunday.
14th and Farnam Sts.
1324 Farnam St
Phone Douglas 2872.
NOTICE Out-of-town patrons
can get Plates. Crowns. Bridges
and Fillings Completed in One
Day.
Free
No Students.
Lady
Attendants.
EXCURSION FARES EAST
VIA
ILLINOIS CENTRAL R. R.
Choice of circuitous and direct routes to NEW
YORK and BOSTON. Attractive routes to all Eastern
Resorts.
OPTIONAL OCEAN, LAKE AND RIVER TRIPS
Liberal Stopovers
Why not let us assist in planning trip affording
visits at Principal Cities and Summer Resorts in the
East?
Tickets on sale daily, with 60-day and October 31st limit.
For further information and attractive literature, call at
CITY TICKET OFFICE, or write S. NORTH, District Passen
ger Agent, 407 South 16th St, OMAHA, NEB.
PHONE DOUGLAS 264.
fin i i
1