Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, July 10, 1916, Page 4, Image 4

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    THE BEE: OMAHA, MONDAY, JULY 10, 1916.
I THE OMAHA DAILY BEE
i FOUNDED BY EDWARD ROSEWATER
VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR
THE BEK PUBLISHING COMPANY. PROPRIETOR.
Entered si Omaha poetefflce ae eMond-elaae matter.
TERMS OF SUBSCRimON.
Br CarH Br matl
per month per year.
Oallr and Bandar SSe IS.eS
Dallr wUaoot Bandar 44s
Eveninv and Bandar 40a
Evening without Sunder S6e... 4.00
Bonder Bee enlr 10. Z.00
Deilr and Bandar Bee, three reare In advaneo. 110.00.
6end aotiee of enange of addreea or Irrerularitr In de
liver to Onaeha Bee, Circulation Department.
REMITTANCE.
! RemH br draft, express or sestet order. Only S-eent stamps
j taken nv payment of email aeeoante. Pereonel cheeks.
! exeept on Omaha and eastern exchange, not accepted.
OFFICES.
. Omaha The Bee Baildmg.
South Omaha 2111 N street.
Council Bluff 14 North Main street.
Lincoln 520 Little luildlng.
Chicago- am People'! Gas Bolldmg.
New York Room 801. 284 Fifth avenue.
St. Lento 000 New Benk of Commerce. ,
Weehington 725 Fourteenth street, N. W.
CORRESPONDENCE.
Addreea aommanleatlone relating to news gad editorial
matter to Omaha Bee, Editorial Deportment.
JUNE CIRCULATION
57,957 Daily Sund-y 52,877
Dwtght Willis nit, circulation manager of The Bee
Publishing eompanr, being dulr sworn, says that the
average circulation for the month of June, 1914. waa
57.067 dailr and S2.H77 Sunder.
DWIGHT WILLIAMS. Circulation Manager.
Subscribed In mr presence and sworn to before me
tan M dar at July, 1914.
HUBKKT HUHTEB. notary Public.
Subscribers leariae lke city temporarily
should hare The Boo mailed to them. Ad
drees will be changed as often as requested.
It it up to Texas and adjoining states to
show visitors that-their summer resort claims
arc not based on hot air.
. China is in the 'market for a loan. Like all
Other nations i. needs the money. Some day
somenation will pay off a loan and surprise
the rest. . '..
King; Constantine has not registered a kick
against the allied usurpers for two whole weeks.
Evidently the allied paymaster is a gentleman and
diplomat. ,
It is atill a question whether enough of the
western fighting front will escape cemetery regu
lations to "permit digging for the gun metal
buried there.
Whether Pancho Villa is living or dead makes
little difference at present. The 'chief source
of worry for Carrama is that Villa's spirit is
inarching on.
The proposed federal inheritance taxes possess
one welcome virtue. Eventually the tax will
reach property which rarely, If ever, made the
acquaintance of a tax assessor.
I."-. Boring for oil in China has been abandoned as
unprofitable by the Standard Qil company. Wetl
i digging evidently failed to produce enough oil to
grease the palms of mandarins.
Philadelphia reformers are wrestling with three
election officers indicted for frauds. The chances
of scoring a fall are about as good as in the late
lamented Omaha wrestling match.
If nothing more important taxes the energy
of the grand army on the Mexican border, a few
sheaves of glory might be plucked by discovering
the whereabouts of the Texas Rangers.
Colonel Bryan has raised his limit to two mil
lion men "ready to spring to the defense of the
country." Meanwhile the recruiting offices would
welcome a few of the colonel's springers as a
starter. , '" .-..'
Owing to the liberal distribution of fat divi
dends the war brides of July overshadow the
brides of June in speculative society. Viewed
from the material standpoint, one spells income,
the other outgo.
The esteemed Wu Ting Fang of diplomatic
memory does not appear to be a factor in the re
organized government of Chins, His absence
from the council of state sticks a Urge Interroga
tion point In its path.
War correspondents on the southern border
have ample reasons for flouting a diplomatic
- settlement of the Mexican muss. The shifted
base of controversy imposes too severe a drain on
the imagination to justify the expense.
An eastern philanthropist offers to finance a
single tax colony in Palestine. No better place
could be chosen to try out the experiment No
doubt the Turks would cheerfully split with any
one who believes he can collect a single tax in
that locality. . '
Nebraska Press Comment
Hastings Tribune:' The Omaha Bee wants to
know why there should be a platform convention,
anyhow, three months after the candidates are
nominated. O, just because.
Central City Republican: To counter-balance
the high price of paper, the big dailies would be
just as interesting if they cut out three-fourths
of the automobile literature and raised the price
on the remainder.
Ord Quiz: Whereas the Omaha World-Herald
was during the primary campaign hurling
epithets, invective and verbal brickbats at Mr.
Bryan it is now, since the St. Louis convention,
- patting him on the back and handing him
s bouquets. And it has been the same Bryan all
the time. - Oh, politics; what inconsistencies are
perpetrated in thy name. ; : .
Newman Grove Reporter: Clarence Harmon,
"state food commissioner, is an adept at getting
. all their is in his office. In addition to working
those who are subject to inspection by his office
to help him put over his six-year term idea he also
publishes a newspaper and solicits advertising
from concerns that are subject to inspection. He
may be honest in all he does, but it looks bad and
for the good of the service he ought to be sep
arated, from his job.
Fremont Tribune: Lest we forget, there is
, a domocratic majority in both houses of con
gress as well as a democratic president in the
' White House to be provided with republican suc
cessors. To gain trie presidency and to fail of
carrying the senate would be but half a victory
and would delay for two years the comnletion
of the republican program for national rehabilita
tion. This is a campaign in which no tricks are
to be overlooked. One of the necessary senators
is to be elected in Nebraska. The republican
; candidate is John L. Kennedy, capable, experi
enced, a man of large affairs. Let it be borne in
, mind during this vear of oresidential canvaaa
that .there will not be a party victory without
ina icing it complete in alt tne branches of gov
ernment, -, .
Where Draw the Line?
One of the amazing arguments put forward to
excuse or justify the policy of the Wilson ad
ministration that has sacrificed American lives and
American interests in Mexico to a day-dream, is
that the amount of American money invested
there has been grossly exaggerated. The most
conservative estimates place the total of American
investments in Mexico at $1,000,000,000, this
money having been advanced for the building of
the railroads, the equipping of the mines with
modern machinery, the digging of irrigation
ditches, the sinking of oil wells, the development
of various industries, etc., most of it long since
rendered useless and much of il completely
destroyed.
Now comes a democratic apologist to tell us,
"it is probable that instead of $1,000,000,000 in
vested in Mexico, not much more than one-fourth
of that amount was ever actually sent there, but
it is sufficiently large to demand protection." In
other words, whether American interests in for
eign lands, honestly acquired under the laws of
those countries and held under treaty guaranties,
are entitled to the protecting arm of our own gov
ernment depends upon the amount of dollars and
cents value. True, it is suggested that a foreign
investment aggregating $250,000,000 is "sufficient
ly large to demand protection," but how much
would the figure have to shrink to lose its right
to protection? Would only $100,000,000 of Ameri
can investments in Mexico absolve our govern
ment from standing up for American rights? Or,
if $100,000,000 invested would still be "sufficiently
large to demand protection," would only $10,000,-
000 let us out? Where draw the line?
Must we not have a foreign policy, and an ad
ministration to back it up, that asserts the rights
of American citizens wherever they may be, at
home or abroad, on sea or on land, regardless
whether they be millionaires or wholly moneyless?
Case of Postmaster Porter.
The high and mighty postmaster general at
Washington is bound to work his imperial will
on Postmaster Porter of Bridgeport, to the end
that a proper example be established for the edifi
cation of all understrappers in the service. Post
master Porter had the temerity to suggest that
some of the money used to increase pay of de
partment heads might be better applied to in
creasing the service to the public, especially at
Bridgeport, where it was needed. For this he
was summarily "discharged" by the p. m. g.,
whose dignity was affronted that a subordinate
shoutd dare to talk back. Porter, righteously
indignant at what he deemed an abridgement both
of free speech and the right to petition, declined
to turn over his office, and prepared to resist the
ouster. He now finds himself under arrest on a
technical charge of embezzlement, and threatened
with punishment. His crime consists of his criti
cism of the Postoffice department. His case ought
to win much support lor the Wilson regime in
western Nebraska.
Water, Wells and the State's Cash.
After the first astonishment at the statement
has passed, wonder is renewed as to what the
democrats did with that $850 worth of water pur
chased from the city of Lincoln for use at the
state house. At the boasted Lincoln rate of 15
cents per thousand gallons, this is equivalent to
more than 15,000 gallons a day, which is a con
siderable quantity, even for a good state house,
let alone a leaky, tumble-down affair such as
Nebraska clings to. Of course, the water must
have been furnished, or Lincoln never would have
charged for it, but the fact justifies suspicion that
has set Governor Morehead to looking into the
matter of wells. No One ever thinks of drinking
Lincoln city water when any reasonable substitute
may be had, and it is certain the democrats at
the state house didn't use that much in the process
of lavation, for no bath tubs can be found in the
building. The only thing absolutely sure in the
mystery is that it has cost the state $850 to use
Lincoln water at the state house for one year.
July's Distribution of Wealth.
The midyear distribution of wealth on ac
count of interest payments and dividends in this
country cannot be computed accurately. That
it constitutes a mighty pile is beyond doubt. Avail
able statistics of stocks and bonds listed in the
exchanges, mainly railroad and industrial secu
rities, the larger part of the whole, distributed
more money than in any former midyear period.
The New York Financial World figures the total
at $292,372,540, surpassing the record of a year
ago by $22,000,000. Stock yielded $107,762,540 to
the holders and interest payments aggregate
$184,600,000, both top records. The World notes
that the industrial groups were the chief gainers,
showing larger' net profits than the railroads,
a fact which war contracts account for. As a
whole, the railroads have done well, and distrib
uted $28,000,000 in dividends. This huge out
pouring of wealth is exclusive of the earnings of
a vast number of corporations unknown to stock
brokers, but whose earnings, in proportion to
capital, are equally liberal. In the aggregate,
doubtless, the midyear distribution of the un
knowns would raise the record to the $500,000,000
mark, or an average of $5 per head of the popu
lation. 1
An Evil That Will Cure Itself. .
In Hamilton county a situation is disclosed
which, in the surface, makes the apportionment of
delegates to the county republican state conven
tion seem unfair. That county is accorded only
nine delegates, because under the. Nebraska law
the basis is the vote last cast for a republican
candidate Tor president.,
The party down there, which was badly split
four years ago, is now wholly re-united, yet it
is granted a voice equal only to half what its
present numbers would warrant The extent to
which the bull moosers have come back is at
tested ' by the figures of the recent primary
which show that in Hamilton county there were
polled 1,084 republican votes and only three pro
gressive party votes and this is not exceptional,
but finds repetition in nearly every county in the
state; in fact, in forty-four counties out of ninety
three, no progressive party votes whatever were
cast The law governing political conventions
in Nebraska, however, does not recognize the
primary vote. We rather wish it did for, in that
event, it would put both bull moose and populist
labels off the ballot But these discrepancies, the
outgrowth of an exceptional condition, will all
disappear with the vote polled at the election
next fall, when this apparent evil will cure itself.
It is hardly to be wondered at that the allies
are jubilating over their successes right now,
having had mighty few successes heretofore to
jubilate over.
ITOn-AV
Thought Nugget for the Day.
Four things come not back the spoken word,
the sped arrow, the past life and the neglected
opportunity. Anon.
One Year Ago Today in the War.
Belgians repelled attack on right bank of Yser.
German reply to second Lusitania note re
ceived in Washington.
Austro-Germans made strong resistance in
southern Poland, but continued to retreat.
General Italian assault in Adriatic coast dis
trict repulsed, according to Vienna report. "
French attacks were repulsed by the Germans
north of Souchez, south of Albert and on both
sides of the St. Nihiel wedge.
This Day ta Omaha Thirty Years Ago.
Prof. Donaldson, a gentleman of some renown
in the prize ring, is spending a few days in the
city under the patronage of Ed Rothery.
James Ross, who for a year has been con
ducting "The Breakfast Table," has given up
journalism, and accepted a position as cashier
of the Union National bank, of which Captain
Marsh is president, which has opened in Masonic
block on Sixteenth near Capitol avenue.
Officer Dempsey has gone to Chicago and
will return with his wife, who has been paying a
visit to her mother, Mrs. Galligan.
The Fowler packing house at the stock yards,
is being pushed with great energy by the firm
of Delaney and Riley. They are employing about
eighty men.
Willie Hoagland, son of George A. Hoagland,
fell off the fence and sustained a serious com
pound fracture of his arm. Dr. Lee was called
in to dress the little fellow's injuries.
Henry Wilkins, accompanied by his sister,
Alice, has left for Cheyenne, Denver and other
mountain resorts.
A pleasant private party was given by Fred
Zotzman at Victor park on Twenty-fourth and
Mason streets. The guests were entertained
with music, dancing and refreshments until a late
hour.
Today in History.
1775 Georgia sent out the first provincial
vessel commissioned for naval warfare in the
Revolution.
1780 French army of 6,000 men, under
Rochambeau, arrived at Newport, R. I., to aid the
Americans in the Revolution.
1792 George M. Dallas, the vice president who
cast the vote in the senate which decided the tariff
policy of the nation in 1846, born in Philadelphia.
Died there, December 31, 1864.
1850 Millard Fillmore took the oath of office
as president of the United States.
1851 Louis J. M. Daguerre, inventor of the
daguerreotype, died in France. Born in France,
November 18, 1789.
1863 Clement C. Moore, author of the bal
lad, "Twas the Night Before Christmas," died
at Newport, R. I. Born in New York in 1779.
1866 Prussian armies defeated the Austrian
allies at Hammelburg and Kissingen.
1884 Paul Morphy, the world's most famous
chess player, died in New Orleans. Born there
in 1837.
1891 The German emperor and empress were
welcomed by the lord mayor of London at
Guild hall.
1898 The Americans resumed the bombard
ment of Santiago de Cuba.
1905 A Franco-German agreement over Mo
rocco was announced.
This Is the Day We Celebrate.
M. D. Cameron, vice president and treasurer
of the Peters Trust company of Omaha, is just 58.
He is a native of Ohio, where he started out in
business, coming to Omaha from Schuyler in 1902.
Guy Howell was born July 10, 1890, at Albion.
Neb. He is the son of Attorney F. S. Howell
and is salesman for the Akron-Marathon Rubber
company.
Admiral Sir Percy Scott, recently relieved of
the command of the air defenses of London,
born sbcty-three years ago today.
Theodore Marburg, noted publicist and former
United States minister to Belgium, born in Balti
more, fifty-four years ago today.
Finley P. Dunne, author of the "Mr. Dooley"
stories, born in Chicago, forty-nine years ago
today. '
Pleasant A. Stovall, United States minister
to Switzerland, born at Augusta, Ga., fifty-nine
years ago today.
Rear Admiral W. H. H. Southerland, U. S. N.,
retired, born in New York City, sixty-four years
ago today.
George Fred Williams, Massachusetts politi
cian and late United States minister to Greece,
born at Dedham, Mass., sixty-four years ago
today.
William LeRoy Emmet, member of Naval
Advisory board and first serious promoter of
electric ship-propulsion, born at New Rochelle,
N. Y., fifty-seven years ago today.
Isaac N. Seligman, one of New York's leading
bankers, born on Staten Island, N. Y., sixty years
ago today.
Where They All Are Now.
W. S. Seavey, once chief of police of Omaha,
is running a detective agency in Seattle. A postal
card juat received states he is "75 years young."
H. J. Penfold, former factotum of the Knights
of Ak-Sar-Ben, is gathering in the shekels at
San Diego.
Chris Specht, pioneer Omahan and former
councilman, is winning his way in Los Angeles.
"Bob" Clancey, friend of the Nebraska legis
lators, is now connected with the Southern Pa
cific company at San Francisco.
Timely Jottings and Reminders.
Buffalo will be the mecca for the Mystic
Shrinera of the country today, on the occasion
of the opening of the annual imperial council
meeting.
Thousands of Elks from all parts of the coun
try will gather at Baltimore today for the annual
national convention and reunion of their order.
The Interstate Commerce commission is to
begin an important hearing in Chicago today
relative to freight rates on lumber and its
products.
The new oil-burning engine torpedo boat de
stroyer Rowan is under orders to proceed today
from Boston to the Maine coast for her official
trials.
Many men of eminence in business circles are
scheduled to address the first world's salesman
ship congress, which is to begin its sessions today
in Detroit V I
Dr. Arthur Warren Waite is under sentence
to be executed at Sing Sing for the murder of
his father-in-law during the week beginning to
day, but notice of appeal will act as a stay of
execution.
Nearly 75,000 children, representing many na
tionalities, have been enrolled by the Philadelphia
daily vacation Bible schools for the summer ses
sions, to begin today.
Storyette for the Day.
The soldiers marched to the church and halted
In the square outside. One wing of the edifice
was undergoing repair, so there was room only
for about half the regiment
"Sergeant," ordered the colonel, "tell the men
who don't want to go to church to fall out.
A large number quickly availed themselves of
the privilege.
"Now, sergeant," said the colonel, "discharge
alt the men who did not fall out and march the
others to church they need it most." Boston
Transcript
Auto Club la With Us.
Omaha, July 7. To the Editor of The
Bee: The board of director of the Omaha
Automobile club wish to commend The Bee
on the stand taken by it, relative to an
enforcement of the law compelling automo
biles to come to a stop while street car
is taking on or unloading passengers.
8. E. SMYTH. Assistant Secretary.
Likes and Dislikes of a (leader .
Omaha. July 8. To the Editor of The
Bee: I, for one, am sorry to see the essays
on natural science by Garrett P. Serviss
make way for your new column, "Today."
True, you publish a natural history article
occasionally on the magazine or household
page, by Mr. Serviss, but these, with the
exception of those on prehistoric mammalia,
do not interest the majority of yonr readers
of mature age, I do not think.
1 do not mean to criticise the editor on
his new departure, but we will sorely miss
those fine writings on the mysteries of the
earth, the sun, the moon and the stars, in
terspersed at times with an essay on the
mysteris of psychology. I think some of
the extracts from the Literary Digest,
the American magazine, the various big New
York dailies and other publications, that
often took up this space, will also be looked
for at times by many of your numerous,
readers. I am afraid that if I say very
much more on this subject the editor will
censor this to the waste basket, so I will
call a truce.
The write-up of a speech at a Child's
Point picnic, by Dr. George Pi Wilkinson,
interested ma very much it is indeed in
structive, I may aay educational. But we,
who are on tha side of personal privileges,
and believe In a moderate indulgence In
those things that are as the speaker said
"natural to nature" muet remember what
is shead of us this fall. Do not forget
then, yoji lovers of an occasional glass, to
start your good work at once. If you do
not, these prohibition folk who are trying
to take the enjoyment of such picnics away
from you; who are bound, it seems, to lower
the value of the property we own, and at
the same time increase our taxes (for this
will surely happen) will perhaps be able. to
snow us under and ruin the future chances
of one of the very beat states In the union
our own dear Nebraska.
A. H. WAHREND.
How to Keep Cool.
Hebron, Neb., July 8. To the Editor of
The Beet Everybody knows enough to keep
his head eool in hot weather, but even bet
ter care should be given the feet than the
rest of the person, for If your feet pain
you, it unfits you for work or pleasure
either.
Bathing the feet night and morning with
lukewarm water and a good soap is the
first step in the process of alleviating the
Bufferings of aching feet In hot weather.
Especial attention should be given to careful
drying, else the skin will be apt to split be
tween the toes and cause an enormous
amount of inconvenience. Highly recom
mended Is a liquid composed of boraeie acid,
one teaspoonful, to one pint of alcohol. This
is used in an atomiser and the feet
sprayed with it. This cannot, be used .too
frequently; immediately upon application it
should be fanned with a palm leaf fan until
quite dry. The alcohol evaporates quickly,
leaving a thin coating of the acid over the
feet. This ia cooling, deodorizing, antiseptic
and takes the swelling out of tired feet
quicker than anything.
Then, If followed up with the following
foot powder, sprinkled into the stocking,
you will not know you have any feet:
Powdered starch, ten ounces; salicylic acid,
five ounces ; talcum powder, thirty-five
grains; oil of bergamot, ten drops; oil of
lavender, six drops; oil of wtntergreen, six
teen drops. This should be well mixed,
then put through a sieve to eradicate, all
coarse particles. While its use does not
check the perspiration, yet it keeps the feet
and stockings dry as a bone.
DR. FREDERICK RENNER.
WORLD'S RICHEST WOMAN.
Chicago Herald: Hetty Green's career
calls attention to what everybody knew be
forethat not all the business ability in the
world Is monopolised by the men.
New York World : Altogether a curiously
great woman, with a full share of the
idiosyncrasies of greatness, loving money
only for the power it gave, and simple al
most to shabbiness in the use of it for per
sonal adornment and the things her sex
most covets.
Pittsburgh Dispatch: "The richest woman
In the world T How meaningless it sounds
today looking back over her 80 years. Was
she happy 7 Did she make others happy?
That, and not the mere accumulation of mil
lions, is the real teat of living. Measured
by that standard the richest woman in tha
world might have been the most miserable.
Louisville Courier-Journal: Mrs. Green's
life was not an inspiring example. It was
about as barren in that respect ae the life
of any quiet, unobtrusive, respectable, but
uninteresting person could be. Her mind
was keen, but her spirit was dull. She did
not employ money as an opportunity, or
acknowledge its possession as a responsi
bility. Springfield Republican : Aa a figure In the
financial world she most resembled among
her contemporaries Russell Sage. Like him
she bought low and sold high and kept
plenty of cash and gilt-edged securities on
hand for use to advantage when the other
fellows were pinched. Like him alao ahe
eared little for the things, except money,
which most people of wealth enjoy or feel
under some obligation to possess.
Philadelphia Record : Hetty Green was not
a aslf-made woman. She Inherited $9,000,000
from her father and two or three more mil
lions from an aunt. From her father she
also inherited extreme shrewdness and ex
treme economy. That ahe managed In a long
life to pile up an immense fortune is not very
remarkable in view of the fact that she never
took any chances, that she had so vast a
capital to begin with that she could buy
"sure things" to an unlimited extent when
they were on the bargain counter, and that
she never spent a cent that she could avoid
parting with. She was a very competent In
vestor, and she was economical.
WOMEN'S ACTIVITIES.
There are 2,800 women working as guards
on the railroads of Germany.
Miss Olive Cole, advertising manager of
the Gillette company, said to be the only
woman in charge of an international adver
tising company, is reported as receiving one
of the largest salaries in the world.
Misses Elisabeth Marbury, Anna Morgan
and Elsie De Wolfe are going to France to
remain during the summer to look after
their hospital for convalescent soldiers at
Versailles. This hospital accommodates forty
men and has been conducted by Miss Mor
gan and Miss De Wolfe since October 1,
19 Is.
The Women's Preparedness committee of
Philadelphia, headed by Mrs. George W.
Child a Drexel, voted more than 126,000 last
week for a fund to help establish two base
hospitals on the border. It is hoped to en
roll 60,000 members by July 20. The work
will be done under the auspices of the Red
Cross.
Some one called on Miss Cleveland, daugh
ter of the late President Cleveland, after ahe
had been ten days s a worker at St, Dun
stan's home for Blind Soldiers in London,
and found that she had endeared herself to
the soldiers and the officials of the hospital
and was doing wonderfully good work.
President Pendleton of Wellesley was pre
sented with an automobile by the alumnae
at tha thirtieth reunion of her elass at the
commencement exercises. The Alumnae
association Is to publish a quarterly soaga
sine, Mra. Luey Dow Cu thing to be the
editor. Three new buildings will be erected
this year at Wellesley.
A battalion of 800 women, drilled, ae
eoutered and disciplined, la ready in New
York for work at the front, if sailed to
Mexico, It haa been organised nader the
auspices of tha American Woman's League
for Self-Defense, General Ida Lowell Priest
Is at the head of the battalion, and she says
that every woman t physically fit and haa
taken tha oath of allegianee to tha United
States.
GRINS AND GROANS.
"Charley, dear." said young Mrs. Torltina,
"I have good news."
What la It?"
"The bank sent me word that my ac
count la overdrawn. I looked In the syn
onym book and found that 'overdrawn' is
the same as 'exaggerated.' "Washington
Star.
Helen Did Florence marry her Ideal T
Gertrude The poor girl will never
know.
Helen Why?
Gertrude Her ideal la a man who would
not marry again If her husband should die.
Judge.
Father Can you support her In the styls
to which she has been accustomed?
Suitor Better; I think I can get more
out of you than she did. New York Time,
feEAft MR-KABIBM5,
I'M IH UWE WM A LIFE
.SaXJEft -1)0 YOU THINK HE
VIILL MAKE A HUSBAND?
-Oil WMBS
VES-frwowr CAST MUCK
l&rflHIMlNClJDTrlES!
Bacon I see a minister haa quit the pul
pit of a church In Jefferson City, Mo., be
cause leading members refuse to quit smok
ing. Egbert Too bad the sisters couldn't have
kept it quiet. Tonkers Statesman.
"How is It I saw you kissing Tom Wom
bat? Tou said you thought you could learn
to love me."
"Well, a girl has got to go over her les
sons, hasn't she ? Louisville Courier
Journal. "Old man, I am sure In hard luck. Need
money badly and haven't the least Idea
where I can get It"
"Well, I am glad to hear that. I feared
you might have decided on me." Puck.
Once a very youthful chicken fancier had
in his poaeessslon a couple of bantam hens
that laid very small eggs- He finally M
upon a plan to remedy this.
When the lad's father went the nl
morning to the chicken house he was sur-prtfl-d
to find an ostrich egg tied to one
of the beams and above It a card with this
"""Keep your eye on this and do your Jest.'
New Yortt Times.
I hPftr that Billy is suffering from ath
letic afflictions"
"In what way?"
"He has a running sore, a Jumping taotav
arhe and only a fighting chance of getting
rid of them." Baltimore American.
Bill Tou aay he's a vegetarian?
Jill He Is. , M-f,
Bill But I heard he was a meat pacger.
Jill He Is that.
Bill Well, how does he get along wun
out touching meat? Tonkers Statesman.
"What is the difference between a howj
trark enthusiast and a strawberry inter!
"I suppose the principal difference Is tfcM
while one is trying to pick the winners the
other Is trying to win the pickers. Balti
more American.
THE PHILATELIC TRAVELER.
M. B. Bushier in New York Sun.
Out on the farm Uvea Jamie
Where the movies-are not known;
But he keeps in reach of the things they
teach.
And makes the world bis own.
For at night when his work Is over.
With his album on his knee,
He sails and tramps with his postage
stamps
Over the earth and sea.
He ventures with Columbus
In his tiny caravel;
And hia heart uplifts when the aeaweed
drifts
From shore on the strange sea's swell.
He seeks in southern forests
Where the brilliant quetzals go;
And over the plains where the Indian reigns
Chases the buffalo.
He lifts the cap of freedom
In Chile and" Colon;
And sees where flies In Chinese sklaa
The dragon of -the sun.
So Jamie sits by the fireside'
In a cozy armchair curled;
And with his stamps he sails and tramps
Over the wide, wide world.
Clark JVfav Jaekton BouUeard
The Hotel Success
of Chicago
VOUR busy day in Chicago
can best be managed from
the New Kaiaerhof.
The hotel's excellent service,
its convenience for the quick
transaction of business, its
proximity to theatres, shops
and public buildings make it
the ideal headquarters for a
crowded day.
450 Rooms $1.50 up
With Bath $2.00 up
'ft!!!!
fcrgwirHelif Wwf-is
V The Omaha Bee J
lc Per Wr4 on Phone Orders I
V 1 TELEPHONE '
Ns: Tyler 1000 1 '
Persistence is the cardinal vir
tue in advertising; no matter,
how good advertising maybe
in other respects, it must be
run frequently and constant
ly to be really successful.