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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Nov. 16, 1915)
TI1K HKK: OMAHA, TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 16, 1915.
THE OMAHA DAILY BEE
FDl'NDEIJ BY EDWARD ROSE WATER.
VICTOR ROSE WATER, EDITOR.
The Bps Publishing Company, Proprietor.
PEE BUILDING. FARNAM AND gEVENTKF.NTU?
Entered t Omaha postofflce aa second-class matter.
, 4 .n
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION.
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Send notice of chanre of address or complaints of
iriTFunniy in univrrr 10 umuit um circulation
Remit by draft, express or postal order. Only two
rent stamps received In payment of small ac
count Terminal check, except on Omaha and eastern
eschange, not accepted.
Omaha The Bee Rtillrilng.
South Omaha aig N street.
Council Muffs 14 North Mala street.
Lincoln ! Little Building.
Chicago 01 Hraret HulMlng
New York Room linn, 2 Fifth avenue.
Ft. Louls-608 New Bank of Commerce.
Washington 725 Fourteenth Ft, N. W.
Address rnmmunlcatlona relating to newa and) edi
torial matter to Omaha bee. Editorial Department.
State of Nebraska. County of Douglas, aa:
Pwtght Williams, circulation manager of The Bee
Publishing company, being duly iworn, aaya that the
average circulation for the month of October, 19IJ,
DWIOHT WILLIAMS. Circulation Manager.
Subscribed In mv preacnce and aworn to before
trie, thla M dav of November, 1S.
ROBERT HUNTER. Notary Public.
Subscribers tearing the city temporarily
should have The ltce mailed to them. Ad
dress will te changed an often aa requested.
Thought for the Day
5etre by Harriml Eddy
We art not damned tor doing vrong, but for
not dung right. Jtobwt L. bteventtn.
To auto speeders once more:
Slow up and
Taking the tariff out of politics has been the
dream of real statesmen for forty years.
If anyone anywhere has a right to observe
Thanksgiving day this year, It Is the Nebraska
Lincoln Is having something of a building
l oom, tort. Wa congratulate Lincoln on keeping
pace so close to Omaha's.
Fears for the safety of parts of the state
house must be set down as groundless. So far
n:me of the inmates have been scared into resigning.
A. little team work between the police, the
police court and the rock-pile department, will
make Omaha less conspicuous on the "hobo"
Another governorship hat in the republican
r ug! The belief that the next governor of Ne
Iraska will be a republican is deep and growing
My, how run down those churches which
l:tve increased 40 and 60 per cent In numbers
i.lnce the close of the "Billy" Sunday meetings
must have been before "Billy" came here!
Are the Instigators of that Hughes petition
trying to put the Judge in or to keep htm outT
All is not cold that glitters, nor do loudly pro
claimed purposes always disclose hidden motives.
There Is gloom at Bethlehem and Joy at the
hsbitat of J. Leonard Repogle. In the race for
Pennsylvania Steel control the experience and
years of Charley Schwab were no match for
youth with bulging pockets.
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Allowance should be made for the havoe of
war-weariness on the nerves of foreign critics.
Lbullitlons of Ink at London, Paris and Berlin
help to relieve the strain without disturbing the
temper of the United States.
It must be distinctly understood that civil
'strvlce as administered by democrats does not
protect an assistant postmaster who thinks the
president should have waited a little longer be
fore contracting a second marriage.
A bride of a few months seeks divorce on
tie novel ground that her husband struck her
with a loaf of the first bread she baked. It
may be admitted thst the act constituted "cruel
and unusual punishment," but the extent of the
damage depends on the weight of the missile.
A Judicial review of the Illinois sUte appro
priations leaves stato finances in such a mess
that an extra session of the legislature Is Im
perative. The Illinois legislators thundered In
the Index for reform and economy, last winter,
giving more attention to partisan publicity
schemes than to the essential business of the
late. The cost of an extra session merely
emphasizes the blunders of windy incompetents.
Andrew Pa i ton. a field asent tor the Cltlaena"
Was ue of Chicago, la trying to organise a Cltlaens'
league here to promote order and repreae the liquor
traffic. At a meeting at the opera bouse, which he
addressed. Dr. P. 8. Lelsenring acted aa chairman,
and seated on the platform with him were H. T.
tiara. Dr. a F. Wlleon. Rev. I, B. Detweiler, General
Howard and Rev. E. B. Oraham.
Aa a flrat etep to free teat booka the school board
has ordered the pupila to be fumlehed with penclla,
lubber eraer and drawing materials.
liciVgue Brothers have purchaaed the lot on the
northwest corner of Fifteenth and Dodge streeta,
where McShene's livery stable now stands, and wlli
rrect thereon In the next two years a handsome bank
structure, and would commence at once but for a
year's lease on the property.
V.I I. Mary A. Llvermore, the distinguished lectureaa,
(a stopping In the city.
The Pacific Tt-lvgraih company haa opened an of
fl In Omaha, located at SIS Boulh Thirteenth street
William Johnson, the well-known sprinter of Pitts
luiKh, la here trying to arrange a race with local
Nebraska Koadi. .
A recent report of the federal department of
rtads placed Nebraska among the lowest of the
Kates in the number of miles of permanent sur
faced roads, but this condition promises to be
changed If plans matured in various sections of
tbe state are carried to fruition, seedling miles
having been completed In several places, to
which additions are to be made as funds are
available. One thing which outsiders do not
appreciate, however, in reaching conclusions
concerning tbe roads of the state, is the nstural
soil drainage In most sections of Nebrsska,
which renders permsnent surfacing less Imper
ative than In most places. More significant by
far of the prospective improvement of roads in
general Is the way the smaller cities, villages
and rural communities are taking up the matter
cf scientific construction of dirt rosds.
Outside of the funds created by taxation for
road purposes hundreds of towns and rural com
munities are raising money by subscription for
road work, sandy stretches are being graded and
clayed, muddy and waterlogged portions also
Ktaded and drained, hills cut down and a general
awakening manifest to the commercial value
of better roads. It Is nothing uncommon to find
small towns subscribing from $1,000 to $3,000
for aiding country communities to improve the
loads leading to the towns and what Is more sig
nificant still as bearing on the results this work
when undertaken by private funds Is not done
by the typical township road overseer and his
wasteful methods and unsatisfactory results, but
ly skilled road builders who make that their
business and provide themselves with the facil
ities for doing the work. Moreover, many coun
ties In Nebraska will In ten years, at the present
late of progress, have every trunk line road
scientifically constructed. The automobile, espe
cially since the farmers have become extensive
users of the machine, has been the most potent
factor in bringing the people who most needed
good rosds to a realisation of their value and no
longer is the position of road overseer looked
upon as a Joke or a sinecure for some man who
simply needed the money or was greedy enough
to grab for it. The major portion of Nebraska
is still too sparsely settled and the traffic vol
ume too light to expect an extensive program of
l ullding permanent surface roads Immediately,
but with the character of the soil as it Is In most
eectlons, It is possible to have a system of dirt
reads that will be the pride and Joy of those
vho travel them.
How Many War Victimi ?
The estimate of 6,000.000 men killed In the
war put out by Colonel Heussler, the Swiss
military statistician, exceeds every calculation
of war losses hitherto published. General
Creene, In a talk at Went Point in September,
placed the year's dead at 2,000,000. Up to
October 11 the Rotterdam Courant computed
the total casualties of Germany, Austria and
'turkey at 5,000,000 men. British casualties for
the same time, officially reported, totaled 493,
284. French and Russian losses are unknown,
but probably not less than the Teutonic loss.
Assuming the correctness of the later estimates,
Colonel Heussler's computation comes pretty
close to a truthful measure of war'a havoc to
Booker T. Washington.
In the death of Booker T. Washington a
really towering figure haa disappeared from
life's activities. He has stood not only for the
best Ideals of hla race, but what Is of vastly
more importance, he has worked along practical
lines for the realisation of those Ideals, and his
doath is not alone a distinctive loss to the col
ored race but to the white aa well, for the prob
lems of the colored people are also the problems
of the white In a large measure under our po
litical and industrial system. Sinca the ending
of slavery, two really strong men of the negro
Hood stand out. Not that the race has produced
but two men of marked ability, but those who
have places fixed in history are Frederick Doug
lass and Booker T. Washington. The former
Performed a great service for hla people In
tattling their political and civil status In the
formative period following emancipation. His
talents commanded the respect and attention of
tbe white man at a time when It was absolutely
ebsential if the problems following the changed
conditions were to be solved, and in this respect
the people of his race owe him a debt of per
petual gratitude. Fully as commanding a figure
Is Booker Washington, though he addressed hlm
iclf to a different problem the economic and
social uplift of hla race. The great Institution
at Tuskegee standa as the most conspicuous
monument to hla genius, and from that Institu
tion and the teaching of Washington haa (mi
Lated an influence sure to be permanent.
Industry, thrift, education and character
building have been the keynotes of Booker
Washington's preachments. It was a herculean
(ask which he set for himself, but, with the help
of those whom he inspired, wonders have been
accomplished. That the work Is finished his
most enthusiastic admirer would not assert, for
that there yet remain too many, both of his own
people and of the white race, who either do not
understand or live up to the Ideals which ha
tsught, is too patent Yet he accomplished won
ders and it will need be a large man who can
step in and take up the work where be laid it
Ain't It a Joke?
The new principal of the High 8chool of
Commerce lets it be known that In writing
recommendations for boys going out of thai
school, he will include on the information card
whether or not the boy smokes flgarettes. The
High School of Commerce principal Is a late
comer here and Is doubtless ignorant of the fact
that we have on the statute books of this state a
Ibw which prohibits and penalises the sale of
cigarettes, not to boys alone, but to one and all.
That law, however, as every one is aware, is as
much of a dead letter aa the wholly disregarded
"no-treat" law, and as a consequence cigarettes
are aold aa freely to minors as to adults,. because
!t Is no more of an offense. Yet the law-makers
who pretend to take themselves seriously have
repeatedly refused to modify our anti-cigarette
law, and make it enforceable againat the sale to
school-boys, where alone such sale might be
I armful. It certainly is a huge Joke for a high'
s-hool principal to put a cigarette smoking item
on a recommendation card in a atate where
(itarctte selling without exception Is illegal.
i . . . -.
One credit mark may be given tbe Bulgars.
King Ferdlnsnd does not attempt to hide or pal
liate tbe national appetite for territorial lout.
Aimed at Omaha
Nebraska City Press: The Lincoln Journal In de
ploring the fact that without an election this fall
It will be necessary, on account of ballot congestion
next year, either to revert to the annual election
plan or make the ballot shorter, hits only half the nail.
Just aa The Omaha Bee says. It la not necessary to
revert to the annual election plan to correct the evil
of congestion and bewilderment of the votes which
surely will be the case nest year. We have too many
elective offices In Nebraska, The Omana Bee 'a a
pioneer In thla much-needed reform and the Press
la not far behind, having advocated thla thing for
several yeara. The ehnrt ballot la as necessary as
any other reform we can think of at thla particular
moment. The less elective officials the lesa politics
In public office holding; the more appointive officials.
under proper civil service regulations, the more ef
ficiency and the more service for the money ex
pended. Let that glad day come.
Norfolk Press: "Billy" Sunday s wholesale con
signment of Omaha citizens to the lower regions
haa at least had the effect of arousing the Interest
of citizens of the metropolis In that place of future
abode, If one may Judge from the columna of learned
dissertations now appearing In the letter bos col
umna of the newspapers of the city.
Blue Springs Sentinel: That must be a virions
atmosphere they have In Omaha that would cause
Richard K Metcalfe to turn against hts bosom friend,
W. J. Bryan, on account of the fact that Bryan would
make the democracy of the state a practical political
factor In Its support of the prohibitory amendment.
Humphrey temocrat: The political ring of Omaha
Is again putting Itself on the map by trying to hold
up Gene Melady. promoter of the Hussane-Stecher
match, for the use of the Auditorium In which to
hold the match. Farmer Burns, Handy Orlswold and a
number of the other aports of Omaha have loat quite
a bunch of money betting against Htecher and ever
since that they have been trying to make out that
"Honest Joe" Is a faker and a mediocre wrestler. The
Omaha bunch may be able to keep Htecher from ap
pearing In Omaha, but In doing so they will only hurt
themselves, for Joe Is too popular throughout the
state to have anything the "Omaha knockers" may
say about him, reduce his standing for honesty.
Newman Orove Reporter: The editor of The
Omaha Bee feels relieved because the war Is not to
Increase the price of diamonds.
Nebraska City Press: Newly weds In Omaha who
have been deprived of their educational privileges
before marriage need not be embarrassed or humili
ated. The Board of Education haa made It possible
for young married people to attend night school to
gether and make up for what they missed In the
grade schools. It Is a unique pln and a good one.
Lincoln Star: A woman writes to say that If
Omaha would give as much money to a bunch of
good workera and let them hire a nurse to care for
the sick and feed the poor, "they would fcive more
church members at the end of a year than they will
have after the meetings are over." Undoubtedly this
woman la correct, but what of that? Omaha people
wouldn't do such a thing. It takes Sunday and his
religious ragtime to dynamite the coin from the
Twice Told Tales
The Wrwaaj Hoaae.
Hard luck had struck Johnson a fearful blow. Ia
desperation he took on a Job to sell books from door
All down one street he went without making a
single sale. Then, turning the comer, he determined
to try a new method. The first house h came to was
large and shabby, and a frowsy female answered hla
"Have you a Charles Dickens In your house?" he
"No" snapped the female.
"Or a Robert Louis Stevenson?"
"Or Walter Scott?" asked Johnson, hope dancing
momentarily In hla eyes.
"No, we aln'tl" said the woman sharply. "And,
what's more, this ain't a boarding house. If you're
looking for them fellers, you might try next door;
they take lodgers!" New York Times.
No Qeeatloa of It.
A gentleman who was In France during the early
stagca of the war tells an amusing atory of one of
the fashionable ladles who were among the nurses
In the hospitals there. She saw a wounded man being
carried Into camp.
"Is that an officer or only a man?" she asked,
pointing to the figure on the stretcher.
One of the bearers answered:
"Well, mum, he certainly ain't an officer, but 'e'
been 'It twice In the innards and we've dropped 'in
three times and 'e ain't squeaked yet, and If 'e ain't
a man I don't know what "e Is." London Tlt-Blts.
Klasee for Charity.
Nearly all the youth of the neighborhood attended
the charity basaar. and one by one they drifted to a
atall where a tiny, shapely, scented gray kid glove re
posed on a satin cushion Attached to the cushion
waa a notice, written in a delicate feminine hand
"The owner of this glove will, at 7:S0 thla even
ing, be pleased to kiss any person who purchases
ticket beforehand," ,
Tickets were purchased by the score, and at 7:90
a long row of young men aaaembled outside the stall.
Then, punctual to the moment, old Tom Porson
the local butcher, who weighs 200 pounds and Is al
most as beautiful as a side of bacon, stepped to the
front of the atall.
"Now. young gents." he aald. "thla re glove be
longs to me. I bought It this morning. Now I'm ready
for you. Come onl Don't be bashful! One at at time'
People and Events
In one way or another genius rises to minor human
necesalUea. Bd Foley of Kalamaaoo, Mich., has In
vented a left-handed watch for left-handed people. The
mechanism reverses the route of the hands. Time goes
on Just the same.
A detached husband proves quite a convenience
for Anna Held In theee parlous times. Born in Wir
aaw, reared In Parta and married to an American,
whom ahe later divorced, her citisenshlp, aa officially
determined, descends from the ex-husband and makes
her an American.
Federal authorities are trailing a bunch of wire
tappers whose operations In Pes Moines and Chicago
are believed to have netted a roil of easy money,
estimated at SVM. Complaints Indicate that an
unnamed Xes Moines man Invested heavily on a auie
thing and got stung. ,
General Sir Sam Hughes, head push of Canadian
recruiting, exuecta to go to the war front. When he
gets there something will be doing all the time.
Speaking publicly t Toronto he says It is his plain
to lead his troops In person on "the march to Berlin."
No date has been set for Genera! Earn s departure.
i . 1 1 ... . i - a. . k. . ,. . .
of New Tork peeled K4.tt,((k off the Mid vale Steel
deal and a bellhop turned a tip on Schwaba Into t8.0JO.
About the same time Frank K. Jackson, cashier of
the Northwestern university. Chicago, played the
same game with university funds and dropped 121, OTU.
A Princeton Investigator, addreaalng the conven
tion of the American Association for Study and Pre
vention of Infant Mortality at Philadelphia, announced
that the flni old Quaker atock and the descendants
of New Knsland pttgrlma are steadily disappearing.
Funeral notices of members. It waa stated, too often
carry thu melancholy epitaph. "Last of the family."
The fault la theirs.
Aln nf Fnrelaa l.aajataaare Papers.
OMAHA, Nov. 15.-TO the fidltor of The
Eee: As chairman and secretary of a
meeting of foreign language newspaper
publishers of Omaha, held at the Com
mercial club Friday, we alsh to correct
the Item under the caption "Editors For
eign Language papers Want Patronage."
In the article, which purports to be a
report of the meeting, the statement ap
pears that these editors "organised Frl
dsy noon, tilth the Idea of making proper
representations to business men of the
city In the form of a plea for what they
term their share of the advertising."
The following resolution, unanimously
adopted, clearly Indicates the action
taken, and cannot In any. manner be
construed to mean the above:
Resolved, That It Is the sense of this
meeting to orgnnlze a foreign language
press association of Nebraska at a meet
ing to be held at the Lincoln hotel Tues
day, November 16. 1MB. at 10 a. m., and
to hereby Invite all publishers of torelen
language newspapers In the state to join
us on that occasion In order to complete
such an organization and to foster our
interests before the state meeting of the
Nebraska Manufacturers' association.
Next Tuesday at the Lincoln meeting
some such statewide organisation will
undoubtedly be formed, and If It is it
will be with the purpose In view of tell
ing the manufacturing and mercantile
concerns of the state the truth about for
eigners and foreign language papers by
the only people capable of telling them,
the foreign language editors and publish
ers themselves, and not "In the form of
The foreign language newspapers of the
state need-no "pleading." all they ask
for Is "fair play," and when once adver
tisers are told the truth about these pub
lications In the proper way they will be
accorded the moral support as wen ad
vertising patronage which they merit.
Truatlng that you will do us the Justice
of correcting your erroS, we remain,
VAL J. PETER, Chairman.
. WALTER ROSICKT, Secretary.
Ho to It. Yon Common People I
CHICAOO, Nov. 14. To the Editor of
The Bee: President Wilson quotes six
passages of scripture from Ezekial to
prove that God, through the 'Bible, sanc
tions war. Billy Bryan quotes gent
life and Jesus as against war. Now
comes V. A. Bradshaw of North Platte
Justifying "Billy" Sunday as against
Setting aside the fact that there are
reported to be 800 contending schism In
the Christian religion, these three con
tentions of present specific knowledge
are sufficient to prompt the Inqul y aa
to what the Christian religion Is.
Sure! The Christian religion is like
other religions It Is a Jack-pot organisa
tion by the crafty few to control the
minds of the many. This applies not
only to religion and priests, but to
political parties and politicians as well,
and for what purposes of control,
authority, government, and the pecuniary
interests connected with It.
As a political mountebank, Billy Bryan
takes the lead in this country (Roose
velt having subsided, but his photograph
we still have with us).
Contemplate a preacher as president
of the United States, setting apart a day
of universal prayer by the preachers of
the same beseeching God to stop the
war In Europe, and In the next breath
quoting six passages of scripture to show
that we should prepare to go Into war
ourselves. Most emphatically this does
ahow that religion is the basis of political
action by arbitrary power to control the
minds and bodies of an unsuspecting
Politicians who have been sitting on an
office for the last fifteen or twenty years,
like old hens on similar nests, should
get off the perch or be boosted off. The
country demands a change to the living
from the dead that change of which
Jefferson and Lincoln spoke. These
things can be secured only by the com
mon people through direct action and a
well defined purpose.
Go to It, you common people!
Boston Transcript: The Spanish budget
lor 19W shows a deficit of U..J.
When did Spain go democratic?
Cleveland Plain Dealer: The president's
quotation of scripture as a basis for
national defense is perhaps considered by
Bryan as a blow at him below the belt
Philadelphia Ledger: It is said that
the president tried to get Mr. Bryan and
Senator Hitchcock to divide Nebraska's
share of the spoils between them. The
only difficulty In believing the assertion
Is the fact that in a truly good reform
administration there cannot be any
Indianapolis News: "The board of in
ventors," declares Prof. Taft, "la as Im
practical as a board of opera singers."
And perhaps It Is; but war would have
been a very different thing today If It
had not been for the work of the In
ventors, however Impractical It may ap
pear. Springfield Republican: A moving
picture company and a number of its
actors have been fined $2S apiece at
Keesevllle, N. Y., under the statute for
bidding cruelty to animals. The par
ticular offense was making a horse Jump
from a forty-five-foot cliff Into the
water. The sentence ought to be effec
tive. A limit mlht aa well be put to the
thrill business before !t gets any more
deadly. Our civilisation Is not yet as
Jaded aa Rome's wss.
Philadelphia Record: The prosreas of
democracy In Japan Is Indicated by the
fact that for the first time the veil of
secrecy about the enthronement of the
Mllkado has been dropped and the peo
ple have been present on the mcmcntoua
occasion. A couple of yeara ago Count
Okvima conducted a canvuss for re
election and for the premiership, very
much as an American candidate for
president, or a British prime minister,
would. He addressed the general public,
not onty In halls, but even from the rear
platform of a train.
Tabloids of Science
A method has been Invented by a Rus
sian artist for painting several theatrical
scenes on th same canvas, the p'ctures
changing as the light thrown on them Is
An Italian scientist has figured that a
square mile of the surface of the earth In
sis hours of sunshine receives heat equiv
alent to the combuslon of more than I.COv
tons of coaL
Sizing the Harvest
Springfield Republican: This year's
corn crop. lr. exceeding S.Ono.nno.nnO bushels,
shows what a self-made crop can do
against a world of trouble.
Pittsburgh Dispatch: Thanks to the ex
ceptional October weather, which re
versed the pessimists, this year's com
crop is the most valuable the United
States ever grew, practically a 2.000.0000)
crop. Only once has It been exceeded in
slse. three ere ago. but it Is 16 per cent
larger than last year's and 44 per cent
larger than the five-year average.
New York World: The November crop
report ad'ls the mere trifle of fit.OrO.OOO
bushels to the great corn crop aa Indi
cated a month ago. It also adds only
about r,io,0O0 to the value of the prin
cipal crops this year over what wss last
year the record-breaking total of 15.100,
OOO.OCO. This may help explain why the
country has been able to take up a for
eign loan of SnflO.OOO.ooo without any ap
Washington Tost: No longer Is the
United States depending upon war orders
from Europe for national prosperity. The
purchasing of arms and ammunition,
which undoubtedly gave the first Impulse
to prosperity, resulted In the expenditure
of enormous sums of money in other In
dustries, and with a record-breaking crop
In sight the railroads, barometers of pros
perity, sre st last working their way out
of the financial desert Crops rather
than munitions of war are now the chief
bnsis for American prosperity. The prin
cipal farm crops this year are worth
$5..rpO0,OO0,(JO, exceeding by more than 1500,
Ono.000 tholr value In 1314, the previous
banner value year In the country's crop
Frank P. Shields, editor of the Orleans
Isser. has been asked by many of his
friends to make the race for superintend
ent of Harlan county schools.
The Nemaha Beacon Is the name of a
new paper at Nemaha. II. Morgan,, who
has been operating a Job printing plant
at Nemaha, la editor and proprietor .
William Pest last week sold the Winne
bago Chieftain to Homer L. Glover. The
new proprietor announces that he will
make several Improvements in the plant
A number of the editors of Nebraska
papers last week wrote paragraphs com
miserating Will Maupln, the new pro
prietor of the York Democrat on moving
to a dry town.
Editor Burt Krosen of the Dakota Rec
ord at .South Sioux City began Issuing
his paper as a semi-weekly last week.
The Tuesday Issue is called the Recorder
and the Friday Issue the Record.
The members of the Nebraska Press
association are to decide by a referendum
vote whether the next annual meeting
will consist of a trip to the northwestern
part of the state on a special train, with
the sessions at various stopping places or
at one of the larger cities, aa Is Jhe usual
"(Jueer how some women manage to
cet husbands. look at that frump over
there with a face that could stop a clock.
What boob do you suppose ever fell for
a frontispiece like that?"
"I did. That's my wife. Baltimore
Church I see Trofcfsor Soddy of Eng
land says It will soon be potsib.s to turn
lead Into gold. . .
Gotham In that case little Belgium
ought some day to be a gold mine.
"Did those party leaders refer to me
aa presidential timber?" asked Senator
' In a way," replied the busy worker.
"They said you would have about as
much chance as a wooden Indian."
Husband I wish you'd stop this ever
lasting cackling about my expenditures.
Wife No. I shan't Cackling saved the
capital of Rome and I'm going to st If
I can't save your capital that way.
Ertvthe-Dld the duke say he loved you?
Kate He said he loved the ground I
walked on. , . ,.
Edythe Where were you when he said
II Kate Out visiting papa's gold mine.
Tall Mall Gazette.
Phe Why did you start so?
He (anxiously) Did I understand you
to say your father was failing?
She rhyslcally. I mean.
He (Immeasurably relieved) Oh. all
rlcht. I wss afraid It was something
serious. Boston Transcript
"Flubdub has made his pile as a manu
facturer of axle grease and la going to
"And what will he do for an occupation
"Discuss ethical questions snd gtvs mil
itary advice to the president, I pre
sume." Louisville Courier-Journal.
Mr. Frontseat Will I have tlma to go
out and get a drink, usher?
Usher (referring to curtain) It won't
stay down a minute, sir.
Frontseat (sharply) That's my busi
ness. Galveston News.
A RHYME OF LITTLE GIRLS
Prithee tell me, don't you think
Little girls are dearest
With their cheeks of tempting pink.
And their eyes the clearest?
Don't you know that they are best
And of all the lovelleet?
Of all the girls with roguish ways
They are surely truest;
Sunshine gleams through all their days.
They eee skies the bluest
And they wear a diadem
Summer has bestowed on them.
Lydia doesn't care a cent
For the newest dances;
She is not on flirting bent
Has no killing glances,
But without the slightest art
She has captured many a heart.
Older slaters cut you dead.
Little sisters never;
They don't giggle when they've aald
Something very clever
They Just get behind a chair,
Frowning, smiling at you there.
Florence, Lydia, Margaret
Or a gentle Mary.
They form friendships that, once set.
Never more can very
Staunch young friends they are and
Always clinging close to yoo.
Buds must Into blossoms blow,
(Morn so early leaves us!)
Maids must Into women grow,
(There's the thing that grieves ust)
Psyche knots of flying curls.
That's good-by to little girls!
Insures the most
delicious and healthful food
HO ALUM -HO PHOSPHATE
For Our Little Busy Bees
I ' " ' 1
This Beautiful Doll will
be given Free to the little
girl, under 10 years of age,
that brings or mails us the
largest number of doll's
pictures cut out of the
Daily and Sunday Bee be
fore 4 p. m. Saturday, No
This AsU's nam is Alloa,
he Is twenty-flTe iaehea
high, has light browa hair
and browa eyes, aaa Is beew
ITer picture will be in The
Bee every day this week.
Cut them all out and a&k
your friends to save the
pictures in their paper for
you, too. See how many
pictures of Alice you can
get, and be sure to turn
them in to The Bee office,
before 4 p. m. Saturday,
If you don't win this Dollia.
perhaps you ran get one next
week. Only ene doll will be given
to any one person.
You Can See Alice at The Bee Office
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