Nebraska Newspapers

    Tim P.KK: OMATTA, TtTKSPAY, FflCrTKMBER 14, 1915.
THE OMAHA DAILY DEE
FOUNDED BT EDWAT,' ROSR WATER.
VICTOR ROSEWATEK, 'CPITOR.
T9 Be Publishing Company, Proprietor.
PKH BUILDING, FARNM AND fTKVENTEENTrf
Entered at Omaha pOKtoffir a second -ctae matter.
TERMS OF BCBSCRIPTTON.
By carrier Fy mall
per month. ptr fr.
snr and Kunflar "
Tslljr without WiMidar....' o
fNentrf and SunHay a"c
Kvenlnc without Sunday tbo 4.00
flunday Be only I W
Pewl notlr of chanee of addra fir complalnte of
1rrsular1ty la delivery to Omaha Be. Circulation
X partment.
RtMITTA yCB.
Penilt by draft. prs or postal order. Only two
rnit at am pa received In payment of amail aa
exntnts fersoaal checks, except on Omaha and eastern
oatchaag. not scoepted.
omnft
Omaha Th Be Pullrtrns
South Omaha Si N PtT-rrt.
Council Bluffs 14 North Main Street.
tlncoln t Llttl UtilMlnjf. .-
Chtca-o-eoi Hearst Hulidlna i
Ktw York Room V Fifth svenn.
Bt. Ijrwita-MI New Bank nf Comnwr'.
WaaMnrton Fourtfrlh Bt. N. W.
COR R PON D ENCB.
?tAirea eomtntJnlcatloaa ralatlnir to news aM Ai
orlal matter to Groan baa, Kdltortal bepaxtraeua.
AtoLKT cmcviTioa.
53,993
Ktata of KahraiVa, County of Dmiifla, sa:
Iiwlgiit Wllllama, circulation nKnr of Tha Bm
Publishing company, hclns duly awom. aaya that tha
averafa circulation for tha month of AususL, 1D10.
was iVm
ri WIGHT WILLMW, Circulation Manner.
Subscribed In tny V a and swor to btfora
m, thla M day of iev :oNr, lb.'o. . .
ROBEIU" HUNT5.ll. Notary Public
Subscriber leaving the city temporarily
abouM hare The Be mailed to thorn. Ad
drees will bfi changed a often requested.
ft- swmsr 14
Thought for the Day
SUtt4 by Clara Blaekbmrn
2,'ot uhat I havt, but at 1 do it making
dom. ThottKU Cariyl.
Should be ripe soon for the trall-hltting.
Almost time for the boy with the foot be.ll
hair to make hia debut.
My, but wotildnTthe two "Billies" do great
team work If they were hitched up lb double
harness! v
The tea commandment are (till good enough
for "Billy" Sunday. Note that he haa neither
added to them nor subtracted from them.
Btlll, our German friends would stand better
with Uncle 8am If they took care not to do the
things which call for no much explaining after
varda. When all those prize babies grow up and
intermarry and have children of their own, Ne
braska will defy the world as an experiment sta
tion in eugenics. 4
' "Key. "Blliy preaches "Six days shalt thou
labor," and he practices it like the rest of us by
vorkiog only six days In Omaha and putting in
a seventh day's work at Lincoln.
But, Governor Morehead, hadn't you beard
the gossip about the split of the $6,000 premium
when you approved Treasurer Hall's official
bond? If you had sot, you must nave stuffed
your ears with cotton.
If the Sunday collections in Omaha keep the
pace they have started of an average of 11,000
a day for every day of the six weeks' engage
cient, they will amount to $36,000. There's no
flaw In this arithmetic.
Russia's army "lacks officers, arms and am
munition." That's all. The news comes from
Berlin, couched in melancholy tones, doubtless
prompted by a fear of glutting the German
market with bear skins.
The man who made oath that he saw
mounted guns on the Lusltanla in New York be
fore It sailed on its fateful voyage has been
convicted of perjury and sentenced to prison for
ninety days. The Incident Is a postscript to one
of the greatest tragedies of war.
American bankers appear anxious to accom
modate any or all foreign powers who offer the
right security. Business Is business. Besides,
the esteemed money lenders on this side know
from experience of other days the keen test of
foteign money changers in trimming the Amer
ican eagle, and feel a natural desire to recipro
cate with compound Interest.
Our democratic United States senator from
Nebraska has achieved a place for his portrait
In George Sylvester Vlerek's Fatherland picture
gallery of fame along with Von Tlrpls, the
crown prince. Von Hindenburg, Bernstortf, and
the captain of the Emden.-. In the language of
Shakespeare, "Some men are born great, some
achieve greatness, and some bare ' greatness
thrust upon them."
The Douclas County bar oommlttoe haa reported
favorably on tha admlaalon of Jamea W. Carr, E. K.
Clipplngcr and Lavld M. Btuart to practice.
Tha Emmet Monumont eeeoctatlon haa appointed
commit toe compoeed of E. Klley. Thomaa CalUn
and Dennis Cunningham to confer with other Irian
societies on ralalng funds to aaalat Pevrnell In hla
etruggl for Irtah freedom.
Tha management of AOiletle park la trylns to ae-
cura a female baae ball combination to appear hero
In about two weefca.
Thomaa VcShane, a well knoera realdeot of Omaha.
died at bis homo o.- Baundera at rest, ased SI yeara.
lie bad married allia Alice Cretshton, and five of
their children are reatdenta of thta city, namely
Jamea A. Ucauane, John H. MoHhane, Fells J. Mc
bhane, Ura. MarUa Cannon and Mr a. John B. Furey
lira. Andy BordVn left for tha eaa( to apend about a
month In Indiana and New York City.
Rev. A. K. Haraha, ho waa taken sick while
vialtinf here, left for rt. l-oula. y
New gas Umpa are being put up at the t'nlon Pa
rlfis depot. Tha new burnera have a round globe and
iive a light tar aupe-iiur to the old able lampa.
VV' O. Taylur. local manager of tha Bradatreet
.K y. baa ;uat returned from an extended trip aaaL
What Does Lloyd George Meant
Lloyd George, io a mou dramatic appeal to
his countrymen, urrf on them greater effort
in the pronecutlon of the wsr. From Rome
comes the announcement that the Allies have
determined to change plans, snd to proceed
more vigorously along aggressive lines after the
fashion of the Germans. What does this por
tend? It can scarcely add to the horror that
ar has Inspired In the minds of all who sre
rot actually Involved In the dreadful strife.
It must mean that the pa-nlve prenence of the
Allied forces Is to be changed to activity, and
that mere defence or the crawling offense that
las been content with an Inch or an acre of
ground taken Is to become a more determined
exhibition of wanton destruction and devasta
tion. It would hardly seem possible that any
thing more awful could be than what we have
read of the battlefields, but If war should be
t:ensferred from the trenches to the open, such
tales of carnage an have been told will very
likely shrink to insignificance beside what rosy
come. The possibilities for actual destruction
and Indefinable terror are there, and if loosed
fiom the leash in which they have so far been
held, the world will be shocked indeed. The
proposition haa but one side on which hope my
be seen It will be so terrible It can not last
long.
Doing Tolerably Well.
Rev. "Billy" Sunday Is roaHtlng; his Omaha
audiences as "tight-wads," and exhorting them
(tally to dig up and make good the expense ac
count advances faster. But the truth is that
Omaha Is doing tolerably well by the Sunday
revival, and the Rev. "Billy" must know It, for
be knows better than anyone else what has boen
done In other cities. We are able to make com
parisons of only three cities In approximately
the same class, where for the first seven duys
of the 8dnday engagement the returns were as
follows:
First T Days. Attendance, Collections.
Omaha ia.0Ot
Pateraon 11S 0 7.142.70
Dea Molnea 121 .tW 8,24.
80 we repeat that Omaha Is doing tolerably
well, except povslbly for the discrepancy that
estimates the expense account here at $27,000,
whereas In Des Moines It was only $18,000,
which would Indicate that Omaha has half again
as much money to raise for lb. Is purpose than
did our friends In Des Moines.
Silence at the State House.
The thunder of the typewriter has died
away, and the rattle of the fountain pen no
longer disturbs the peaceful aspect of the Ne
braska capltol. This silence Is ominous, and
the people wait In dread for the storm that will
burst forth when Governor Morehead thinks of
something to say that may serve to excuse his
action In connection with the bond for the
state treasurer. Treasurer Hall holds the fort,
and awaits serenely the next onslaught. The
governor's anxiety has apparently subsided
clnce It was pointed out that he la In some way
responsible for his. own failure to enforce the
law, as well as for the Inexcusable neglect of the
leglslatare to make necessary provisions for
running the state. No amount of explanation
can set aside the facts that establish the present
administration at Lincoln as a monumental
blunder.
Science and War.
. Secretary Daniels, in pursuance of his poller
with regard to the upbuilding of the American
navy, has announced a list of eminent Inventors
and Investigators, who are to form the naval
staff for experimental inquiry. This may in
sure the United States the services of men who
sre of the first rank in their respective fields,
In an advisory capacity, but will it provide pro.
ficiency In the actual service of what must h
our greatest arm in the event of our becoming
Involved In war?
The army and navy of the United States
have not been without the benefit of scientific
Inquiry and deep research, despite the apparent
effort of Mr. Daniels to create a contrary Im
pression. Few outside the service can noasihW
be familiar with all the changes for better re
sults In means and methods wrought In the last
fw years. It is doubtful if Mr. Daniels himself
Is fully aware of what has acutally gone on.
Offieen of all branches of the service have made
many discoveries and Improvements, and have
worked continually for betterment, keeping fully
odvlsed of the progress made In other countries.
and lagging In nothing that would enhance their
erriclency. For one thing, the United States has
a secret explosive, the most powerful and best
behaved known, discovered by a eolonel of the
line. It Is far ahead of any form of explosive
now used by other nations. The rifle used by
the American Infantry has the highest power
known to military men. Our big guns have at
tained results that so far have not been excelled
in modern practice. An American submarine
boat recently made a non-stop run In open sea
aud under stressful conditions that Is not sur
passed, even by the Germans. Innumerable de
vices for improving the service have been In
vented by officers in the service of the United
States, men who know what is needed, and
whose imagination sweep the whole range of
war's possibilities.
The new board of scientists may help by
their presence, but a little more faith la the
men who have actually done things In the way
of preparing for war would not be amiss.
The outside world gets an inside glimpse of
the mainspring of Mexican revolutions from the
news story of the vast pile of loot gathered by
Villa's retired lieutenant, General Urblna. In
two years this industrious robber looted the In
habitants of five towns out of millions and
rtored the plunder on hia ranch. Giving up the
plunder to superior force does not help the vic
tims, but it shows how quickly Pancho Vllla e
guns are muffled when a rival robber "cornea
across with the goods."
The enterprising boosters of De Moines
show surprising lack of good judgment In choos
ing the present time to hook a Methodist bish
opric. Omaha Just now is the one genuine cen
ter of religious effervescence in the United
States. Here lg the throbbing atmosphere of
sanctity, the plain, broad trajl to salvation. It
Is the atmosphere in which Methodism thrives
and rejoices. The notion that a live ona can
be drawn away from live surroundings emanates
from msuyfrsttled brains.
I The Courteous Customer
A Yasser Ctradaate la tbo Ontlook
I HAD Jtist finished my ahopplng when 1 saw my
friend the silk buyer-a silk buyer In a large de
partment store. Bhe la the kind you read about
On thla day aha waa standing In the department, a
frown on her face, as she looked after a cuatomer
who wna going; down the a Idle.
"I wish I could write," she aald when she saw
ma.
"What would you write about?" I asked.
"I'd write about shoppers." she said. "The way
women shop. We do all we can to get fine merchar
dlae, we train eiir girls to be courteous and to know
their goods so that they csn sire Intelligent service,
and then aoma women come In here that"
"What would you call a courteous shopper?" I
asked.
"Well," aaid the buyer, "there are really lota of
them, and H'a ao easy to be one. In the first place,
a good shopper haa her shopping all planned alaec,
amounts, and all, as nearly aa she can tell. Five
minutea with the atore directory eaves her lota cf
step. Bhe flmla out where she wants to go before
she goes to the wrong place. All our good customere
seem to know the store ao well. They have their
shopping coins for Identification and their printed
address books you know, little Blips to pasta on the
schedule ao they won't have to wait for the salesgirl
to write it all out. Thoy take a transfer If they are
going to buy several things, and have everything sent
together.
"Then a nice customer alwaya keeps her temper.
If her change la delayed or the floor manager wanta
identification, she'll be reaaonable, because ahe knows
It's part of the eystem to protect ber.
"I think It's courtesy for a shopper to shop early
In the day, and not come running In at the Inst minute
for something unless aha haa to. We hear a lot about
employers keeping the girls overtime, but did you
ever hear about customers keeping gtr's after clos
ing? Well, they do.
'Then our courteous customer makes frlndu of the
salesgirls. Do you know, hT I had much shopping to
do, I'd rather have frlenda behind the cou.ter than
anywhere they'd help me more. They can watch the
new merchandise for you, and let you know when
something cornea In that you'll like. You gef a clever
salesgirl and ahe enjoys keeping track of thing for
her regular eutomera. Here !a Just an Instance. We
have a customer from out of town who knows many
of tha girl a In the store. The other day ahe wrote
In to the aaleaglrl aha knows in the suits. She said
she wanted to get a auit, waist, hat. and petticoat
on a Saturday morning, and wear the whole outfit
to the theater that night. Bhe mentioned the namo
of the girl she goea to In tha millinery department,
and told the ault department girl to go to her. The
girls got Interested In It, and when the woman came
In they were ready for her. They had aeveral com.
plete outflta planned, and the woman had selected
the whole thing- In less than an hour. The friend who
was with her aald ahe had never aeen such luxurious
shopping! Now, If that woman hadn't made a friend
of the salesgirl, the girls would never have known
her tastes and"
"It's like the house that Jack built." " I aald.
"Indeed It Is," said the buyer: "only It's bette
than a house the Interest of the people with whom
you shop. Why, many of our girts are friends In
need to the poor men whose wives alwaya want them
10 atop in on the way to tha office and match a sam
ple or get a pair of glovea. One of the girls told me
tha other day that ahe shops for several men whose
wlvee think they have such remarkable taate!
"But about being friends with tha girls, they ap
preciate It so. Just this morning I found one of my
glrla all smiles. She had filled a glove order for s
customer and the woman had written to thank her.
Of course the girl waa only doing what she la here
for. but I guesa every ona likes appreciation every
now and then." -
As I went out I stopped for a moment at the walt
eala. A woman was there with fire In heP eye. Bhe
waa giving a floor manager her opinion of the store.
"What do you mean," ahe demanded In a loud
tone, "by advertising a sale of ehlrtwalata-ii alzea -and
then when I gat here there la not one lhat will
fit mat I( have had a charge account for years In
this atore, and my mother before me, but I'm going
up right now to stop It. I simply will not trade at a
store where I get such treatment."
The courteous alslemaa atarted to explain. The
sale had been a popular one, and the large aaeort
ment of waists had gone quickly. There were still
plenty left In large alaea, and an order for any site
could be got In a few days.
The cuatomer did not want to order. She had had
enough of ordering. Tha atore never order anything
right.
The atsleman looked at his watch.
"You aee, madam. It la really quite late." he aald.
"and tha Ua haa been on all day. It Is five Inutee
to alx, and we cloae at six promptly."
"Blx!"' exclaimed tha cuatomer. "Blxl and I've got
to have dinner for company by aeven. I ll not wait
to atop that account tonight but If I ever get auch
service again 111 cover come here to trade any
more." And tha Invited gueat of the atore flounced
out.
The alaleman sighed snd turned to tha girl at tha
walet counter.
"Women Irk that." he aald. "are the kind that
make me cranky at night to the klda"
"I got her first." aald tha girl; "and the queer
part of It waa, thta walat here fitted her exactly, only
It's marked else M and aha aaid she's alwaya worn ZK
and aha hasn't got any fatter, either. I tried to tell
her thla make rune small, but nothing doing. I aaw
her going tor you-I know her kind. Thank goodness
there goes the bell!" And tha girl began to fold
away her stock.
I looked from the harassed floor manager to tha
tired sateadrl.
"Tha oourteoue customer!" I thought, and I hue.
ried home.
Twice Told Tales
Getting; Back at Hla ReTerea.ee.
A a Irishman was reproved by his priest for eating
aausagea on Friday.
"Sure. Father Tim. ye don't call aausagea meat."
ha protested.
"Certainly they are meat," said his reverence.
Tha next day. the Iriahman appeared at the priest's
house with a load of sawdust
"But, Michael. I did not order any sawdust; It was
wood I ordered."
"And len t It wood I've brought ya?"
"No, It Isn't; It's sawduaf
"But, Father Tim. If aauaaga la meat, sure lan't
sawdust wood?" Boaton Transcript.
Tbo Biter Bitten.
Mh k and Pat went up to London together and as
they strolled down ona of the atreeta Pat noticed a
ehop which a solicitor had taken temporarily while hia
offices were being repaired. Aa there was nothing in
the windowa Pat went lnalda to Inquire the reason.
Ha aaw two clerks sitting on their high stools bually
writing.
"I savgl' aald Pat" what do you aeU here? You
have nothing In the window."
"Oh." said on of the clerks with a smile, "w sell
monkeys here."
"Well, then." returned Pat "you must be doing a
foln trad only two of you left" Itiiladelphla Tele
graph. Qalte SIb1.
A story I going the rounds of the British empire
about MY. O'Leary, father of Sergeant Mlohaet O'Lcary
f the Irian Quarda, who won the Victoria Cross for
killing- eight Germane, capturing two and taking a
trench.
It la recorded that when Papa O'Uaary heard the
detail a of hla aon'a exploit, he curled a disdainful
lip and said:
"An" he kilt eight Dootchmea, did be? Aa' why
shouldn't be? Sure, aa' did I -ever go to the county
fair without knockin' over tatnty Irishmen or more
aa' me with only my traneen tatiik)? An' Mike had
a rifle an' bayonet to help him. didn't he? Sure, an'
with a rifle an' bayonet he ought to have dune It. an'
alay, too." Nw York Tiinea.
Letter Carrier Thank The He.
OMAHA, Sept. 11 -To the Editor of The
Bee: Dear Sir: On behalf of our local
committee, permit me to thank you moet
sincerely for the very efficient manner
In which The Be has reported our recent
national convention of the National As
sociation of Letter Carriers, a paper
which haa ever espoused tha cause of the
letter carrlera In general.
Our convention was a excess In every
particular, and the unlveraal comment
that It was the best convention they have
ever attended, if the expressions made to
the membcra of the local committee may
be .taken as any criterion to go by, la
sufficient In itself to repay us for the
many months of hard labor put forth to
make it a success In every particular.
Again thanklna you for the past cour
teatea extended, I am, W. C. BOUK,
Secretary Convention Committee,
Branch No. 6. N. A. L.. C, Omaha, Neb.
Good Thing Pnsh It Alone;.
OMAHA. Pept 11. To the Editor of The
Bee: Please send The Bee, daily and
Sunday, to the following named persons,
beginning today and continuing until
November, and charge to my account.
I am aendlng the paper on account of
your excellent reports of th "Sunday
mcetlnga." CHARL.B9 B. ADV.
To Many Nolee.
OMAHA, Srpt 13. To the Editor of
The Bee: Of the numerous letter
printed m your paper, those of the moet
Importance aa to ptenaur and comfort of
the citizens of Omaha are on the sub
ject of "noise."
The train before thrtr arrival at the
station startle th entire neighborhood
with their loud ecreaohlrur, non-mualoal
tone, when there Is absolutely no occa
sion for this nuisance.
Soma automobile cause considerable,
noise when being cranked, which might
be due cither to an Imperfect engine or
an operator deaf to noise, falling to ap
preciate the feeling of others. The con
stant sounding: of home while the auto
mobiles are passing through the atreeta
la unnecessary and la the cause of many
accldenta to people on the croswlngf, due
to the sudden fright Many time one
may nottc an occupant of a car sending
forth a screeching noise to attract th at
tention of a party on the top floor of a
building to Inform htm that his car is
In waiting.
Newsboys and men, particularly during
the qulutnen of the Sunday morning, are
busy informing the partially awakened
people of their desire to sell their papers.
AH day and part of the night you can
hear "name your city, I've got your
home town popper." The loud and harsh
tones of their, voices Is anything but
pleasing. . ANTi-NOISE
Science and Religion.
SOMEWHERE, Sept. U To the Editor
of The Bee: What matter It where this
la written? We ail admit that "Billy"
Sunday Is a great worker and let us hope
hla efforts sre fully rewarded. However,
In reading his sermons wherein he men
tions beautiful churches snd great sums
to be spent on others, and states he does
not believe In worship In a "chicken
coop," it naturally causes one to think.
Few object to a clean, well ventilated
and properly heated place of worship, but
aa to adornment. Do expensive fittings
and costly paintings prove the religious
seat of the congregation?
Now, to again speak of Rev. Sunday.
Does he still peddle that "stale stuff,"
that "atone age" dope of hell fire and of
eternal punishment? Surely he must know
the churches deny that. Does he still
call science a liar and put Charles Dar
win in hell?
Thousands are with Sunday In his fight
for the right-for his fight against liquor
and to better conditions. But when the
church or "Billy" Sunday or anyone In
a similar position starts to He for the
glory of Ood and to deny proven facts
of science, then thousands of good people
laugh heartily and pity them for their
Ignorance.
A READER OF THE BEE.
Aaalast Retirement Peuloas.
OMAHA. Sept. 11 To th Kdltor of
The Bee: I aee the letter carrier want
a pension when they are worn out Tht
pension buslncea la retting to be a
loathesome burden. Who furntahea th
money for pensions? Isn't It th public?
Why Is a policeman or a fireman or a
let'ter carrier any more entitled to a
pension that a teamster or a bricklayer
or a carpenter or a painter or thousands
of others?
When a letter carrier gets tired working
and want to quit these a lots who want
hia place who are Just as good aa h
was. Then why have to penaion a let
ter carrier. I work In th packing house
at 20 cent per hour. If I am efficient
enough to provide tba policeman or fire
man or letter carrier with a juicy steak
or roast, my penaion la that I hold my
Job, otherwise I get fired.
Yesterday tha dallie contained ptct
urea of a group of women, wives of let
ter carriers, who were about aa healthy
and well-fed a bunch aa was ever gt
together. They did not look th need of
pensions. JOHN LAHKJN.
OMAHA, Sept. IS. To th Editor of The
Bee: A few days ago I Informed you and
the readera of the letter box that I In
tended to Investigate Esperanto. Well,
Mr. Editor. I have done so, and wish to
tell you that the reaultant knowledge
which I hav derived from thla personally
conducted Investigation la highly favor,
able toward Esperanto.
Where can we turn to find a neutral
language? Will It be to Italy. Bpain. the
Netherlands?
Here is a fitting opportunity for tha
us of Esperanto. It la neutral. It ful
fills every condition for a contract be
tween dlvera nationa
Thus saya a wis man of England.
What aay you. Mr. Editor? Cannot you
let ua bear from you In person In aa edi
torial by yourself? I am aura that all
your readers would be glad to hear from
you. DIEGO C COUOd.
The big,
over little
face.
"I want
AW)
PEOPLE AKD EVENTS.
Tipping ha at laat achieved tha honor
of official sanction from Unci Sam. The
comptroller of the treasury O. K.'d a
touch of til for aervants on an oceaa-go-liig
sleamahlp.
Safety first cornea pretty close to per
fection en a Kansas railroad, whoa far
sighted managers provide conductors with
safety pin for u of passenger In emer
gencies. Salt Lak City's Commercial club la
about to start a campaign to land a
federal military academy. On or mot
branches of West Point ar ooasidentd a
likely outcome of the agitation for a
larger array, and Salt Lake City s
making an early atart for a branch.
SUNNY" GEMS.
rlaht now. sir. what are your Intentions
toward my Bister?" he demanded.
"Mum tny intentions are nun not tut
toward vour sua eiater." stammered little
Jig. "They are s wow away from yoi;r
sua sister, air." New York Tlmee.
"KTLLALOO."
"Do you believe thst there Is really
something which can Invariably tell when
a man la tying?"
I know It."
"Ah, perhaps, you have seen one of the
tnmrumenta?
"Seen one? I married ce." Houston
Post
Centenarian Waal. I smoke snd chaw
Surty reaular and ain't never been to a
nctor. and
Hpe'-tallat There's a big mistake here
some place. You ahould have been dead
forty years ago. lyife.
Minneapolis Journal
The famoua song. "Klllaloo." brings ut
old memories. The beat singing comedian
lOngland ever sent to this country was
F"red Ieslle, and with him cme Incom
rable Nellie Knrren snd those wonder
ful dsncers. Svlvia Gerrlph and Lottie
Land. Leeilie packed the theaters with
enthusiastic crowds when he sang "Kllla
loo." Here are parte of the alanxas:
Now I happened to be born.
At the time thev cut the corn.
Quite contaaarlu to the town of Klllaloo.
Where to tsche ua they'd a achame.
And a FVtnch mussoo he ceame.
To Inahtruct ua In the game of par
ley voo.
I've one father, that t swear.
But he said I had a pair:
And he shtruck me whin I said it wasn't
true.
And the Irish for a Jllnt.
Aa the Frlnch for half a pint:
Shune we lamed thlm while at School
st Klllaloo.
"Mais we," mussoo would cry:
"Why, of course, ve kin." sex 1;
"Non. no, I know,'' cried he with much
surprise.
Whin a boy right tip from Clare
Heard hie mother called a mare.
Shu re he gaive mussoo his fist bechuno
the eyea.
Cried mussoo In mi"h alarm.
"Go and call for Johnny Darm;"
"There's no such man" ses I. "about
the piaoe."
KABIBBLE
KABARET
KAJ? MR. KABIBBLE,
HoW MJOi MOWrtf SH0UU A MAM
AT LEAST SnPSuARS-OME
fbft "THE LICE USE AND FIVE RJH
ike minister.
"Why do they call 'em lawyers' briefs,
pa? Are they so short?"
"No, my son, but by the time they xt
(through with them the lawyers' clients
are." tSalttniore American.
gruff-looking mnn loomed up
Jlggs and shook his fist in his
to know, and I want to know
Tern aire Firee
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package of Quaker
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The Great Western
Is First
Into St. Paul
and Minneapolis
Through steel trains every morn
ing and evening connecting Union
Depots with popular through trains
for the north, northwest and Canada.
Lv. Omaha 8:30 p.m.
Lv. Co. Buffs 8:50 p.m.
Ar. St. Paul 7:30 a.m,
Ar. Minneapolis 8:03 a.m.
Glistening new steel club cars,
and coaches besides steel sleepers,
through on night train.
Day trains carry through Buffet
Parlor cars and coaches.
P. P. BONORDEN, C. P. & T. A.,
1522 Farnam St., Omaha.
Phone Doug. 260.
3C-rfcrBMssT 11 i
MS I a aaaa s aaig t '
(Empha$iz9 tht "GretC)
Persistence is the cardinal vir
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in other respects, it must be
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ly to be really succcessful
Then buy a
7:29 a.m.
7:50 a.m.
7:40 p.m.
8:15 p.m.