Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, August 10, 1915, Page 4, Image 4

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    THK HEK: OMAHA, TUESDAY. AlTflUST 10, 1913.
THE OMAHA DAILY DEE
FOUNDED BT EDWATU3 ROSKWATER.
VICTOR ROSEWATKK, EDITOR.
TVa Pee Publishing Company, Proprlitor.
HEB BUILDING. FARNAM AND BKVENTgENTH.
r"lwj at Omaha post office a srcond-chuis matter.
XLHMS Or SUBSCRIPTION.
By carrier Fy rnatl
poc month. per year.
itly nfl "iinda M
Tslly without Hunday..,. 4.0S
l-?venlrg end Sunday. ..." T no
Kvemn without Sunday.... JKo 4.00
unday only 1-0J
Bend notice of chant of address or complaint of
Irregularity la dUvry to Omaha Bee, Circulation
Department.
REMITTANCE.
ltnitt by draft, espres or postal ordar. Only two
cent stamp received In payment of am all ee
counts fnonal cheeks, azcept on Omaha, and eastern
szchanff. not accepted.
OF PICKS.
Omaha Tha Bee Building
South Omaha Oil N street.
Council Bluffs 14 North Mala treet,
l.tnooln LIttto Building.
Chlcago-Ml Hearst Hulldln;.
New Torh Room 1W, 6 rlfth rwna
Ht Iou1s-MI New Bans of Conimw
Vaahlnrtoo 72R Fourteenth St.. N. W.
CORRESPONDKNCH.
Address communications relatlrir to new and dt
lorlal matter to Omaha Baa, 7.dltorlal Dapartmecit.
JLLV CIIICLLATIOS.
53,977
Mat e' Nebraska, Countr of Dougls. .t
Dwlsjht Wlllinma, clrctilstlon manager of Tlia Be
Publishing company, belna: duly aworn, says that the
average circulation for tha month or July, Ula, wee
kt..'7.
nWIOHT WILLIAMS. Circulation Manager.
Subscribed In my present e and aworn to before
too. thia M day of Ausust, 115.
ROBERT liUNTlin, Notary Public.
Subscriber leaving Uw city temporarily
abonld har Tho Dee) mailed to tUem. Ad
drtwa will be changed aa often aa requested.
Thought for fje Day
ITeare a Ut trith iereei rail, bvt Iht bh$r
(nf JartA it toil. Pan Dyke.
That excess Item In the precipitation column
can hardly lt much longer.
In the very nature ot things that Tractor
aliow at Frciuont must be a drawing card.
It will be up to us to reciprocate with Lln
' coin on Omaha day at the forthcoming state fair.
A Jot of political boomleta can sprout and
fade away before next April, when Nebraska
Lolds its nominating primaries.
Pancho Villa chockles merrily over Senor
Carranxa's g!ad hand extension. At the same
time be fondles his artillery and warily scans
the range.'
Those newly appointed federal payrollers
will have the satisfaction at least of drawing
four months' salary before the senator Is called
cn to decide whether to acquiesce or not.
With one rider killed and two badly injured,
the Des Moines auto racing tournament makes
Omaha's look. tam by comparison, and helps
explain the .muttering of dissatisfaction over
the lack of thrills at the meet here.
. Our fighting spirit has the right edge when
properly provoked. The way we are hopping
on the Mexican raiders on the Rio Orande and
the half-baked warriors of Haiti Indicates a rea
sonable state of prepardnesa for small game.
Ban Francisco Is putting In a bid for the 1916
republican national convention, its strongest
ilea being that the Pacific coast has never had
one before. Neither has Omaha, although it
too has all the needed facilities and equipment.
You Just can't lose a good man. He's our
old friend, Rev. Samuel Zane Batten, of the Ne
braska Anti-Saloon league fame Introducing the
resolutions denouncing the government of Colo
rado at the Philadelphia miss meeting protest
ing on the conviction of Lawson.
SSBBBMBWSaaawSBSBBBaaaSBBM
It Is figured that although ocean shipping
facilities have been reduced only about 25 per
cent, ocean transportation charges are two and
a half times what they formerly were. This
situation ought to work almost as well as a ship
subsidy If only It could be counted on to last a
leasonable length of time.
Just the same it looks like a tremendous eco
nomic waste to put $10,000 into the construc
tion of a tabernacle that Is to be torn down with
in sixty days, when the city has Just bought the
beautiful, fire-proof Auditorium for the very
purpose of accommodating big meetings, con
ventions and similar assemblage.
Though a trine unseasonable, tt Is not too
early to remind prospective coal consumers test
next winter will sport a backbone as stiff as a
steal girder. Growing foreign demand ' prom
! to send war price to the home consumer
with sufficient force to humble the pride and
shrink the puree of neutrals. Ia this, aa la other
lines, the Innocent byeUinder geta the hammer.
Plain Words to the Fire Underwriters.
The fire underwriters are bringing all sorts
of pressure to bear upon the city authorities for
the replacement of our fire alarm system at a
cost of approximately $160,000, to say nothing
cf largely added expense of maintenance, hold
ing out vague prospects ot relief from the long
exacted extortionate fire rates, and an Implied
threat that no reduction will be forthcoming
until this demand is met.
It striken us that it Is np to the underwriters
to tell us In advance exactly what rate reduction
they will make In exchange for the proposed in
'eatment in fire alarm apparatus, and In view
of our past experience, to put it In written con
tract form so that It can be enforced,
Omaha's present fire rstes date back many
years, and are made up of numerous penalties
charged agslnst us for alleged shortcomings in
fire protection, 81nce those rates were made,
however, many of the defects have been re
moved, and tremendous advances made in less
ening fire risk. The bugaboo used to be the
single line' connection to the pumping plant In
Florence, which has now been remedied by the
construction of a second main. The water dis
tribution has also been bettered by pipe exten
sions In all directions, by Increase of ptimpage
facilities, and by enlargement of storage reser
voirs. But no recognition whatever has come
from the underwrite In rate-making.
Omaha Is today spending more on Its fire
department per capita, and proportionately to
other municipal activities, than any other city In
the country. It has adopted new, and up-to-date
building regulations, meets all requirements In
electrical wiring, and has admittedly fair In
spection of explosives and inflammables. Most of
our new buildings are of the highest type of
construction, many of them with sprinkler equip
ment. But we are paving the same fire rates
exacted befr "iee improvements were made.
Omaha ' en a field highly profitable to
the fire Int companies, but they have not
dealt fairly ;maha. It seems to us that it Is
high time tint they show some disposition to
meet ns half way.
May Strike a Snag.
All-American negotiations for the settlement
of Mexican affairs do not appear to be proceed
ing as smoothly as might be wished, and may be
seriously delayed because of difference of opin
ion an to the status of the "clentlflcos," or for
mer adherents of DIM. President Wilson wants
to Ignore entirely this class of Mexicans, because
they gave their support to Huerta and thereby
Incurred the displeasure of our president. Sor
South American representatives In the cons
ence believe all classes of Mexicans should have
consideration and are therefore disposed to in
sist that the men who largely control Mexican
ludustry and commerce be permitted to have
something to say as to bow the new government
chall be formed.
Carranza has also shown himself Inclined to
further disturb the situation. His action In ex
I tiling In most summary fashion the minister
from Guatemala Is not calculated to further the
process of peaceful adjustment, especially as It
3 alleged by the agents of the "first chief" at
Washington that the withdrawal of the Brazil
ian minister from Mexico was due to the um
brage given Carranza by the participation of Bra
ail In the conference. This action might be passed
over, as a great many acts of the Mexican "lead
ers" will have to be, in order thai peace may be
achieved, but it seems improbable now that the
program of President Wilson will be adopted
without delay and amendment.
The Tractor Show.
Out at Fremont this week the Commercial
club of that town In conjunction with the Twen
tieth Century Farmer, published here In
Omaha, are entertaining one of the most im
portant gatherings assembled anywhere in the
world this season. It Is a meeting of the big
frm machinery makers of the country, who are
showing to the world what their engines can do
lu a practical way for agriculture. Nothing bet
ter illustrates man's progress along the upward
path than his advance In methods and processes
of agriculture. Americans have long led In this
regard, and almost everything that has been in
vented or devised to Improve the ways of plant
ing, cultivating, or harvesting crops of any kind
is of American origin. The tractor show Is im
portant first, because it exhibits to the prospec
tive users of the power the machinery that Is
nuking farming more and more of an exact
science. Haphazard methods have been aban
doned by the progressive men who have brought
the yield of the western empire up to its present
magnificent figures, and have added millions to
the wealth of the country through their enter
prise. To them the big traction engine Is a
means to an end, that of still further increasing
the output of the farm while reducing tho In
itial cost.
In a secondary sense, the traco;- ls im
portant la ahowlng how the forces of nature may
be harnessed for man's productive uses, as con
trasted with the exhibit offered In eastern cen
ters, where wheels are whirling night and day
t produce destructive agents.
tt
Mombara of tha Oinaha Hon aaaoclatlon ar
Jubilaut over tha work of thdr craw which la com
pound of Conner, atroka; WUiaton. Brown. White, Wll
co and Loana.
Henry Kummero haa applied for the poaitloa ot
Instructor In phckal training at tha hi eohooL
Tha wooden aidrwalk on tha Wabaah comar la
bel:. torn up to rnnke room for a sranolltoio pave
ment whk'H wilt extend up to tha Oooa hoUL
The towa la ago over a new order Uaued by Mayor
Boyd requiring- ealoona to cloae at mtdnlht. and keep
tlia front door ahut on Sunday.
Tha orlaioal colored braae and alrln hand haa been
iornUed and named "Omaha Independent" with
ten number. John Lewia, leader and treaaurer;
Oeorte Belden, aerreant; Q. W. Qataa, praaldent; A.
I eecretary. Headquarter and band room Capi
tol aveaua and Eleventh etraet.
Frank Burkl-y haa one to Chiracs.
Mra. Faul Wl'cox. formerly klUa Minnie Maul, la
In th city with her young- eon.
rr. Ferdinand Bchroeder, with bU two brother.
August and John, returned from Atrblaon wheia they
ent to tha funeral of their brother-in-law, Mr. Miller.
Mra. IC C. Moor and daughter or back from thuir
tuir.mcr vUtt In Oinnect1cut
2T It oa Noah, Now.
Counttc r.cratlons of mcu huve blushed
and bowed tl.ir hear t the thought of how
Fcther Adam acted when It was discovered that
he had taken a bite or the apple. Instead of
shielding Mother Eve an a good and gallant
gentleman should, we have been taught that he
sought to exculpate himself by blaming ber as
being a temptress. Of course she was, just aa
all her daughters have been, luring man to the
undoing of his egotism, and slyly laughing at his
confusion, but the.sons of Adam have learned to
stand up and take the censure themselves. But
now comes a learned assyrtologtst, and take
the load off Adam and Eve, and puts It onto
Noah. It was the grsnd old sailor who ate the
forbidden fruit, according to a bit of theology of
the anclenta, just deciphered at Oxford. It may
be a long time before Adam la fully exonerated
from the guilt Imputed to him, and as for Noah,
he being a sea captain, and already accused of
tippling, putting the curse on Ham, and a few
other things, he won't mind being made the
siapegoat Just once more.
Where were those special committees of the
Commercial club, the Economic league and other
civic vigilance associations when this giant tax
levy was being put over?
Aimed at Omaha
Nehraaka City Prrne: Omaha moUon picture the
ater mannftrr are being; brought to book hecaune
they permit th alulea of their theater to be crowded
during performannea, contrary to the city ordlnancea
and atate lawe. Men in the picture bualneae who ae
rlflce "aafety ftrt" to additional proflta ehould heed
the leaaon taught to them Juat a few days ago.
BeA'rlce Expreea: The attempt of the ho! ot
Hate a at Omaha to Interfere with the Billy Sunday
revival meetlnga by Injunction proceeding to prevent
the erection of a large tabernacle within the fire
limit, haa failed, Judge Rerilck refusing to grant tha
Injunction on the ground that aa an attraction the
noted evangellt come within tha siune meaning
of the law a do atreet carnival and fair. Tho
partlea objoctlng to tho erection of tha building al
iened that It would be a nuisance and a fire hasard.
Hllver Creek Hand: Omaha frequently doe thing
which dlffrnce the state and exasperate many of It
cltixene, but nothing it ha ever dona ha been ao
flagrant an Inault to our citizen aa will be the pull.
In off of the acrobatic and obacene performance
of the blatant Billy Sunday. We hope at leaat the.t
the newapapers will not devote much apace to the
hlaaphcmer.
Lexington Pioneer: In aptte of the objection
urged againat tha buljdlng of the tabernacle for Billy
ftunday In Omaha, It la to be built. The Injunction
"ought to reatraln tta erection haa been refuged. Jt
Funday dWt kln thoaa old moeaback dinner of
Omaha when he opens tip, hell I not hot.
Columbu Telegramt I gueta the authorltiea mut
have forbidden the aale of ahotgun to the people of
Omaha. I reach thta ooncluaton becauae of the fact
that during tho peat ten day five little plrls, rang
ing In age from 13 .', Ifi year, have been outraged by
Omaha men, and at last accounts none of tha out.
rager had been killed.
Silver Creek Band: A brute named MIckle haa been
writing letter to The Omaha Bee lately In which he
tell how he ha mined a family of elx children and
znved up money on hi wage a a day laborer. He
ays that the only luxuries "we have" are 40 cent
worth of tobneco a week. He don't ay who "wc'
are, but It would lead one to Infer that the whole
family uaea It, or elee he hoga tt all himself and call
hlmeelf In a later letter he Bay that two of
iila daughter are working during vacation and whils
at Tret they gave Mm all tha money they earned,
lately they liav rebelled and refuse to turn over
only enough to ;;ay for their board, and that one of
them actually quandered $3 for a silk walat. Well,
If the man MIckle ha rained hi children aa he
states, no wonder the girl rebel and demand a few
cent which they earn thenwelve, for randy and a
little finery.
Fremont Herald: Tha Omaha Bee sent a force of
writer and photographer to Fremont a week ago to
make up a "special booet" for the city that ha now
become famous over the land (or the holding of an
nual tractor show. That force of men did. Its work
well. Yesterday morning's twenty-four-page edition
of The Omaha Bee was half given over to a magnlfl-
. "spread" for Fremont and the big tractor show
Wad other events of the coming week. The second
section was copiously illustrated throughout with pic
tures of business blocks, residences, street scenes and
portrait of Fremont men. The leading "story" in
this edition of The Bee reads so good that we take
pleasure In reproducing It.
Fremont Tilbune: Omaha haa made a good del
of noise about reviving water transportation on tho
Missouri, but only one little boat Is In sight The
truth 1 that railroad ran be built and operated more
cheaply than the Missouri can be kept dredged of Its
sandbars.
Beatrice IQxpress: Mayor "Jim" Dahlman of
Omaha drove a mule to victory in the race at th
Nebraska metropolis Thursday, the mayor's mule, ap
propriately named Omaha Belle, leading a field of
seven contestants.. Whether In a political race, a
horse race or a mule race, .Mayor "Jim" generally
-gets there."
Twice Told Tales
i Really at a Lom,
During a marriage ceremony In Scotland recently,
the bridegroom looked extremely wretched, and ha gut
so fidgety, standing flrat on on foot and then on th
other, that the "beat man" decided he would find out
what th trouble wa.
"What's up. Jack?" he whispered. "Have ye lost
the ring?"
"No." answered the unhappy one. with a woeful
look. "Th ring' safe enough; but, mon, I've lost ma
enthusiasm." Every body'a
Too Mark of a fiood Thlagf.
A Brockvllle man, who haa a home In Scotland to
which he return In the winter, bought an e'xpenslv
fur cap In this country to giv to his gamekeeper. Two
year ago last winter he took It over and presented It
to the old man, who waa dnlighted with It
The cap wa very serviceable, having earflap. and
would wear almost a lifetime. The. next winter th
American again returned to Scotland, and noticed to
hi aurprla that the old man did not wear the fur rap.
"What I th matter with th cap I gave you last
winter 7" h asked.
"I haven't worn It since the accident" replied the
old gamekeeper.
The man from Brockvllle pondered. "Tou didn't
writ me concerning any accident" ba aald.
"No?" mused the gamekeeper. "A mon offered me
a glass of whisky and I didn't hear him." Rv.-y.
body'a
on Speed, That.
Th square of a certain towa ia the south waa lo
cated about a mile from th railway station. A negro
named George had a bootblacklog stand near tha
square. On day, while George waa at work, a man
came up and began to quarrel with hla customer. After
aom heated word, on of th men drew a revolver
and fired on th other.
Several week later, when th eaa cam Up for
trial. Oeorge wa the star wltnee.
"Now, George," aald tha attorney, "desortbe Just
how this shooting took place."
"Tesauh, bo. Pa gvn'ruan fired two ahote. Ta
auh, dey went bang-bangt Je like dat sun."
"Tou say he fired two ahota, Oeorge? Will you
tell the court Just what you war doing when these
two shots were fired?"
"Welt, yoh honah, when he fired de fust (hot I
wa shining de gen'man' shoe, and when he fired de
second shot. uu, I waa pasatn' de deppo." Everybody's.
Uncle Fogy's Philosophy
T. ML U gwdg
Thar ar time when the most placid of us yearn
to kick a freh ho clerk aa a mule kicks a black
smith whose ministrations annoy him.
How disgusting It I to find that what w have
told a friend In confidence, be haa told a friend in
confidence!
Moat of th "Hon.'" would be of mo re value If
they war stuck upon pole la th midcil of corn
field. Where an ordinary man la a liar, a statesman ha
merely been misquoted.
There are aom leading citizen and more mis
leading cltlseii.
How readily the loaur kees the rong in gambling!
Boxing teachers sell Instruction by the pound.
There la no room tike a muohioom.
A termagant aeidora haa a termlnua.
Nobody haa anything oa Cupid.
Cvcn to stay tha caiaet
Calls for Chaaare of Political Scenery
NORTH PLATTE. Aug. .-To thj
F.dttor of The Bee: Mr. Oeorge W. Per
king, the progressive party promoter,
says "This country Is not prepared for
either w-ar or "peace." ,lle mlg.it have
added that we have three prospective
wars on hand with Mexico, Germany and
.England.
The native Aztec has always been In
revolt against the Spanish Invasion lor
0 years. It hn been said that th Aztec
were barbarian, given to human sac
rifice. If they can beat the human sac
rifices now being made in Europe by
Christian nations, they will have to come
some more.
For forty years the democratic par;y
ha followed In the wake of the lepub
lloan garbage wagon waMng for ome
thtng to fall off for Its benefit. When
Itoosevett overthrew the republican
wagon, the democrats gathered Up the
Messed privilege of overthrowing this
government and "fixing" It. But Wilson
did not know what to do with the
"blessed privilege" after he got It, but pro
ceeded to make the most of It by deliver
ing an ultimatum to Mexico, Germany
and England, and getting turned down
by the three of them. ,
To Invade Mexino and make her be
good, would be like taking candy from a
child; but Wilson dare not take the re
sponsibility. He now sends to five or
lx South American governments, which
are of similar race or religion, soda!
habits and revolutionary tendencies, as
Mexico, and with this conglomeration
proposes to make Mexico be good. To
hold a constitutional election In Mexico,
or almost any South American state,
would be like organizing wild geese Into
a colonization society. Tney might settle
down at night, but no telling where they
would be the next morning. Not o le
Mexican In a thousand votes, or care
to do so; all h wants 1 to be let alon
and enjoy himself. Mexicans are demo
crats, and If Wilson want to support
democracy, he should have siippirtod
Villa; bis present policy will suppress
Villa and reinstate the same Interest
that were represented by Huerta. Such
will be the result of holding at the pres
ent time a constitutional-dictated election
In Mexico, and under present condition
none other can be held.
If Wilson Is determined to make Mex
ico be good, let' him procted on his own
motion. Of the two contending factions
In Mexico, Huerta represented Imperialism
and Villa revolutionary democracy. One
or the other of these most prevail; there
ls no Intermediate ground. Wilson now
has an opportunity to demonstrate his
democracy. Let him clean up his Job
In time to give O. W. Perkins a chance
to demonstrate where he 1 going tu
progress to.
The American people are tired of
"bunk," tariff. Income tax, or any other
nonsense. They are extremely anxJo a
that Wilson should clean up his democ
racy, and give O. W. Perkins, Roose
velt, et al., a how to get in tholr work.
In the meantime, competent seamen on
their ship of state wiy not desert it till
they see some other ship to which to go.
Tho American people are In favor of
"preparedness" for self-preservation for
themselves not for some other fellow.
Now that the democratic dromedary of
tariff ha expired, and Income tax ha
crawled Into Its hole, what further use
have we for a demon ratio party? Change
the aoene and glv ua a rest, if ws can't
have a remedy. LUCIBN ETEBBIN3.
Where Get "Atrocities." ;
PLATTSMOUTH, Neb., Aug. a-To
the Editor of The Bee: Our family have
taken The Bee for Severn! yeara for state
and local new, but during the next
year. Or until the close of the war,
would like to take a paper that gives the
full account of the German atrocltloa
and barbarities.
We realize that as you have a German
clientage, that that Is the reason you
have to suppress aa much as possible,
while giving whole columns to account
of German-American singing societies,
etc.
So thai these German readers cannot
complain, please publish a list of, say, the
prominent New Tork paper which are
anti-German and pro-German, so those
that pay their money can talc their
choice, and this would be giving to each
Ide a fair "deal." rt. S.
Editor' Note: What you want la not
an American paper, but some paper
printed in London.
Faaalaar of the Hoaae.
LINCOLN, Aug. S.-To the Editor of
The Bee: Poor hornet It I being relegated
to the rear. It Is being forgotten by th
peopio In the latter day rush for sensa
tion. It attractiveness fails to attract
to appeal, to fill a place In the hearts of
th multitude
Tha home which down through the cen
turies brought out the best that waa la
rnaa and woman, that elevated from th
rank of th poor and lowly to th sub
lime heights of patriotism and distinc
tion is being badly treated, to say the
least It Is giving way to th picture
how. the club, t?i pink tea, th local
talent play, th money-grab In th nam
of th church, and basket tali.'
Today the topplnc-plac" for th fam
ily ia a palaca when compered to the
residences of th people ot a few year
agone In equipment facilities, furnish
ings and expense. But the real homey
feeling 1 absent. It Is out en a bender.
It lurk about the streets in the small
hour and slink down the alleyj In an
endeavor to get th attention of Marie
or Rthelbert or the head of the house.
It perch In th belfry while mamma
struts about in tha excitement of tt.e
church bazaar. It folda about It emaci
ated form the ragged habiliments of a
bygone century and shiver In th open.
Evidently it la out ef the game lor
keeps. Will It com back?
Will th home endure once more, after
th people have had their fill of the
husks which ar garnished with allure.
mnt and flavored with th eicklsh per
fume of the street? Will it become again
the dearest place on earth to th boy
and gtrla, to father and mother? Will
tt once mere be recognized aa a haven
of refuge in storm and trouble? Wl I it
appeal more to th youth of th land
than doe tha impudent and smutty
crowd of young peo U who have no con
ception of why they 'are upon earth?
Will the God-gtven love of home, now
dormant become a reality In real lice
and again lend strength and aid to th
knitting sinews of the nation? It will de
pend upon the people.
W. B. REYNOLD!.
Editorial Sittings
Louisville Courier-Journsl: A pesnl
mlst ssys It Is hard to find a Job after
you're . An optimist expects after 40
to have a good many Jobs for promising
young men.
Philadelphia Ledger: The Balkan na
tions, like Italy not long ago, are now
considering whether the German offers
of Austrian territory aro eufflcient and j
If Germany can deliver the goods.
Brooklyn Eagle: "We don't want to
fight hut. by Jingo! If we do, we'v trot
the brains, we've got the steel, we've Kot
the cotton, too." How ls ihat for a
tart at the "Jingo Song of America?"
Pprlngfleld Republican: Reports from
Germany as to the Imminence of martial
law to suppress a powerful peace move
ment will be received with none the
less reserve for being "passed by the
censor." The oensor last winter had
not the slightest objection to tales of
Imminent starvation, but that did riot
make them true.
New Tork World: It has tsken twenty-nine
years to clip three-twentieths of
a second from a man's running record
for a mile. To the unaided Imagination
such a morsel of time means nothing.
Yet It is by the very smallnnss of this
gain and by the desperate effort which
was necessary to make It that we real
ize how near we have come to the ulti
mate possibility In human speed.
Wall Street Journal: Our 1 005.OTO.O00
credit balance for the 1915 fiscal year was
more than twice that of 1911, and nearly
HK,000.(W ahead of that of 1913. It ls a
common error to regard this as wholly
a matter of expansion In our foreign
trade. The fact la that it Is almost aa
much the result of reduced Imports as
of expanded exports. Moreover, the gain
In exports Is Itself due not so much to a
greater demand for our manufactures
as Increasing draft upon our foodstuffs.
.lothes and a hnt forced ba-k ever his
eats dropped In ihe dental chair.
"I'm auaid to give him gus," 'd tr,e
denttKt to the assistant.'"
"Why?"
llo run I tell when he's uncon
aeloua? " I'Mladelphla Ledger.
Admirer Do you ever point pictures In
the nude'.'
Arust oh, hardly! I usually wear a
working Jacket. Yale Record.
The Sergeant (sternly! Nah, then, yer
yonnu blighter, you ain't larfln' at me,
are yer?
The Young Blighter Oh, no, sergeant;
no. sir!
'Hie esergeant (more sternly) Then what
tho 'ell is there on parade tcr larf
at? London Sketch.
"What la that clasa of Klrls doing?"
"Studying fo.iells."
"Well, I used to obiect to being called
one, but I guess Ml own up to it now."
Kansas City Journal.
MY SUMMER GIRL.
Clinton Scollard In Judge.
She wore drcHses thnt were natty
And slim hoots of perfect fit;
She was chipper, she was chatty.
And she had a pretty wit
And her fair hair, I mlRht mention.
Was inclined to crl!, and curl;
She had blue eyes like the gentian.
Had my little summer uirl!
We would sit on the veranda
In the quiet evenglow.
And she seemed to understand a
Fellow's whims and wavs vou know.
She had not n peer at dancing.
And she caroled like a tnerle;
Truly she was most entrancing,
Was my little summer girl:
She could quote a clever stanza.
She could tell a funny tale;
She was life's supreme romanza
For one ordinary male.
And we golfed and bathed and boated.
Till my head was in i whirl;
I was verv much devoted
To my little summer I'.trl!
Clear the skies that brooded o er me,
All earth seemed In perfect tune.
And 1 dreamed I saw before me
An rternnl honeymoon;
But at Inst there came o deadlock.
And she said 1 was a churl.
'Twas when I suggested wedlock
To my little summer girl!
TOLD IN FUN.
"How are you going to spend the sum
mer?" '
"Pa's rented a cottage acaln, and 1
suppose I'll spend It In the kitchen cook
ing fish for our city friends to eat. tho .
way I did last year." Detroit Free Press.
"What makea you think Dauber will
succeed aa a painter?"
"He haa the soul of an artist and the
perseverence of a book agent." Phila
delphia Public Ledger.
KABIB6LE
KABAPTT
Aft MENDEL MINSK SAry.
"A MAN WHO SAYS THAT AIL
IS FAIR IH LOVE AND W&'t
I fcONT TRUST IH BUSINESS
Bridegroom Walter, I hope you haven't
told anybody here we are newly married?
Irish Walter No, sor; Ol've kept It a
secret. Why, whenever anybody trlea to
pump me .sor, O'l've told them you
weren't married at all, at all! London
Mall.
The type of youth who Indulges in louu
Save The Baby
Use the reliable
HOEiLICITS
ORIGINAL
malted Milk
Upbuilds every part of the body efficiently.
Endorsed by thousands of Physician,
Mother and Nurses the world over for
more than a quarter of a century. 1
Convenient, no cooking nor additional
miik required. Simply dissolvein water.
Agrees when other foods often fail. v
Samplt fr, HORUCCS, Racin; Wit.
CSPNo Substitute ls"JustasCood"
as HORLICK'S, the) Original
CALIFORNIA HOTELS.
HOTELTURPIFJ
"IZ TH HZAZT Or TH CITY
17 POWELL ST. AT MARKET
SAN rRANCISCO
CVCRY CONVENIENCE AND COMFOHT
EUROPEAN PLAN. $1 .80 ANO UPWARD
FREE Auto But Meets T
A MOMENTS mSURl
quiet cHat, out under the skies so blue is 1 1
all the more enjoyable v?Hen 'you order I j
l pure, delicious Ice Cream. But, for your
V own sake, bo sure it's
ssce Qwaas
Nv tii eixM Jr
THE BEER YOU LIKE
TLc sweetness of the choice barley malt,
combined with the fine flavor of imported
hops, makes its tnste most delicious.
Save Coupons and Get Premium. Phone Douglas 1889.
LUXUS MERCANTILE COMPANY, Distributors
Persistence is the cardinal vir
tue in advertising; no matter
how good advertising may be
in other respects, it must be
run frequently and constant
ly to be really succcessful.
I