THE 13KE: OMAHA, SATURDAY. AUGUST 1, 1914.
ffc-
THE OMAHA DAILY BEE
FOUNDED DY EDWARD ROBEWATER. "
VICTOR ROSBWATER, EDITOR.
Tho Pop Publishing Company, Proprietor.
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ii
'JUXE CIRCUliATION.
52,662
PtaU of Nebraska, County of Douclas, ss.
Dwlght Williams, circulation manager of 'Ilia Bta
rubllshlnr company, being duly sworn, say that
tha averacra dally circulation for tile, month of June,
S9H, was G2.CC2.
D WIGHT WILLIAMS. Circulation Manager.
Subscribed In my presence and sworn to before me
JhU 7th day of July, 1914.
nOBKItT HUNTER. Notary Tubllc.
"""Subscribers leaving mo city temporarily
should liaro The llco mailed to' thorn. Ad
dress Kill bo changed as often an requested.
Now is the tlmo tu push Imrd on tho alognn,
"See America First."
What Japan Did for Ruaiia.
It Russia Is In tho fight It will havn to thank
Japan for Invaluable- service ronderod In rous
ing: that sleepy slant, not only to a realization,
but also development of latent powers.
Russia's unpreparedncss for the war with
little Japan became proverbial and remains his
torlc. But for this condition the colossal nation
of eastern Europo would not have been humil
iated bofore the world by a power of relatively
llltlputlan size. Since the Portsmouth treaty
Russia has been engaged In husbanding Its re
sources financial, naval and military. Today
It looms an ogro-llko terror on the horizon
of Europe. Russia's total war strength Ih
5,500,000 men, exceeding that of any other
power, and sho has another 5,200,000 available,
but unorganized, combining nearly 11,000,000
men as compared with Germany's 6,200,000,
next In line. In naval strength Great Britain,
Germany and Franco outrank Russia, but Rus
sia Is close on the heels of all but Britain.
"Where would Russia have been, either In
land or scva. forces, but for tho rude awakening
by Japan, who can tell? To bo sure, numbers
do not always tell the story of wars, and It is
doubtful if, man for man, Russia yet comes up
to Japan, although, undoubtedly, If the two
armies clashed today the outcome would bo dif
ferent. The most efficient soldier is not sup
posed to reside In Russia. He may be found in
half a dozen countries first, the United Stater,
Japan, Germany, Great Britain. All this aside,
however, we rauy expect the Russian soldier or
sailor of 1914 to show himself a very different
fellow than his brother who fell a victim in the
far ennt only a few years ago.
Tho best way lo end nu "era of fcusplclou"
In to stop suspecting.
Our sympathies go out to the under dog In
tha European war and tho Omnha ball team.
But do not lot your anxiety for peace carry
you to the extent of refusing to awat tho fly.
The cohesive power of war will be shown. If
the Irish tight together instead of one another.
Carranza, Villa, Carbajal, Huerta, BlanqueC
nil ot them have maidenly gone into the din-card.
A noted ethnologist traces the European war
to a clash of tongues. Tho wdmen are not to
blame this time.
Austria's peremptory domand upon Servla
evidently corresponded precisely with our call
for a salute from. Ituexta.
Now Orleans' war on bubonic rats continues
unabated, with orders to "fight it out along this
line It it takes all summer."
What about Jhat grand approaching celebra-,
tlon of 10&' years ot (ihi'nterrupted peace be
tween English-spiking nations?
All Nebraska will, regret that the Beatrice
corn mills have .been, destroyed by fire. Yet
ereryono is hmppy to know that tho state's corn
fields aro still- safe.
For More Log-Rolling.
The Insatiable democratic greed for pie and
Dower has led tho house to amend the senate
bill relating to irrigation, transferring to con
gress control of all expenditures hereafter made
on tho part of the reclamation service. Ac
cording to The Bee'a Washington correspondent,
thin Is regarded by far-seeing statesmen as a
decided backward step. H will bo so regarded,
we apprehend, by the far-seolng people of the
great west, too, where tho 111 effect ot the trick
ery will be chiefly felt.
Ot course, It Is only another ot the many
movos on the part ot the present administration
to centralize control of the pie-counter. It
offers one more very prolific opportunity for
political log-rolling, which the domocrata are
evidently rolylng on to keep them at tho public
crib. Our correspondent undoubtedly Is cor
rect In the view that such a contingency was
wholly unthought of in the creation of the rec
lamation bureau. This bureau was conceived
to bo the best judge of its own expenditures for
tho promulgation of its own work.
Instead ot endowing tho domocrats with ad
ditional power, this very tranaparent scheme,
togothqr with tho party's persistent assault upon
the civil service, will, we believe, In the end roll
up1 moro grief than votes for the administration,
as it should.
"Let tho people rule" Is evidently no longer
nn ompty cry in Illinois,- wher candidates, by
the thousands aro ready to enter tho field for
the nominating primaries.
Some pacific headlines: "Ulsterltea Agree
to Homo Rulo Scheme," "Carranza Expected to
Declare Armistice." Or, in other words, be
hold tho peaooful effect ot war.
The Municipal Baths.
Omaha has dono well to arrange a municipal
bathintr resort at Carter lakn. nnii tlm flrni rlftv
f'lndfca(es considerable popularity tor It, It
brings to all al)ko facilities for a very whole
some summer pleasure, yet-for an Inland city ours
has never boen extremely put to It for such In
dulgences. But here Is a place let apart under
tho regulation ot the city, which ought to make
It comparatively ssnfo for children and all and
that Is vital to Its maintenance. The teat ot the
Improvement will come, ot course, in tho extent
ot Us patronage. Why this should be restricted
we do not know, in soma cities similar resorts
charging a nominal tee have proved Immensely
and permanently popular, so this one, which Is
without prlro, Bhould become so.
And the man arrestod under warrant from
the coroner "without letting the police know
anything about It" was Bet free with his inno
cence absolutely established aB soon as given a
chance to explain. Guess again!
A dispatch from Indianapolis says 100 bull
moosers ot that city returned In a body to the
old fold of-republicanism with nn appeal to all
former republicans to rally to the support ot tho
O. O, P. Reprehensible absquatulators!
Annexation sentiment Is said lo be growing
In South Omaha. But don't entrust the cause
again to "Mlko" Lee, who was elected on his
pledge tor Greater Omaha two years ago, and
then sold out for a payroll job under tho Water
board boss.
According to his own personal organ, the
senator got everything ho wantod out at Colum
bus, and his enemies were confounded and dura
foundod. Edgar Howard will probably tell us,
however, tho lengths to which the senator had
to resort to save his face.
Mayor Harrison ot Chicago returns from his
aummor vacation to admit that ho has lived out
the wrong theory as to the social evil and Is now
everlastingly fernlnst segregation. Now let the
Honorable Hlnky Dink and Bath House John
kindly turn reformers, too.
Why a Labor Famine!
SUC.U, )arp. numbers, pf unnaturalized Euro
peans aro leaving Pennsylvania steel, coke and
coal Industries as to provoke fears ot a labor
famine. At one steel plant 2,000 passports
have been received. In the territory ot one
Austro-Hutigarlan consul aro to be found from
80,000 to 100,000 subjects of the dual mon
archy, fully 30,000 ot whom ore expected to re
turn for the war.
This raises a serious question which brings
again to mind the grave Injustice ot Immigrants
continuing to reside as aliens In tho United
Statos Instead of perfecting their American cit
izenship. 8Uch a course not only Involves pos
sible harm to business enterprises, such- as In
tho prosont situation, but tho more serious pos
sibility ot transplanting foreign complications
in our country. Tho foreigner born hero con
tinuing as the subject ot another power Is a po
tential disturber, however good and orderly an
individual he may be. And that Is unfair, both
to tho United States and to his own country.
But as to a possible labor famine belug
caused by these effluxes ot foreign workmen,
what becomes ot the cry that tho Immigrants aro
crowding out tho American laborers? It our
land is, as Borne proclaim, now overrun with
idle men, largely for this reason, why not sum
mon them to the places vacated by these for
eigners? Perhaps we may have tho chance ot
seeing how these jobs in the mines, mills and
factories of industrial Pennsylvania will be
tilled if yielded up by the swarthy sons ot south
era Europe.
cMwua rQM ace rilzj 11 1
A meetlnc of tb newly formed athletic club ap
fpointwt this commltteo to solicit subscriptions at U6
a share: Ed Leedcr, John Hoye. Julius TreltschUe
M. 8. MartlnovJUh, Joe Woods.
Th first car whleh has run around the 6t. Mary's
avenue line In twelve days mado tho trip this mornlnc.
Morgan & Henurlx "have' opened up at 503 South
Thirteenth street, where, they will take, orders to de
liver to any part of the city, milk, sour mlk. butter,
milk, cottatre cheese and creamery butter.
Henry Lehman, tha wall paper dealer, has jone to
New York and other eastern pofnts.
W, O. Taylor, superintendent ot Uradstreet's
aseney. left for Idaho and durlur his absence V, B.
Wbodrow will have charee of the Office.
Qeorco Heyn, tho Douelas atreet photographer. Is
back from the tun'.
Folks figuring- on buying- furniture are Invited 'to
S t prices of Chamberlain, Howe & Marshall. Sixteenth
and Davenport
Kaufman Uroilieis. M South Fifteenth, are glvjug
hmj purchaser t-t Ugats a tii i.et good for drawing of
a an u -vt-n.
President Wilson evidently believes In the
promotion ot cabinet officers. Ho Is said to
haro docldod on Attorney Genqral McReynolds
for the supremo court and Secretary of War
Garrison tor attorney general, which Is now re
garded as a stepping stone to the supremo court.
It this plan goea through It will have the effect
ot blocking Secretary Lane's advance to a place
In the high tribunal and probably blocking It
permanently,
The very age la blatant Who shall tell which
la the genuine and which the spurious vole's?
Joulavllle Courler-Jqurnal.
That, indeed, Is the test. But remembering
that "Words are good, and only so when hacked
by deeds," let us judge by the deeds.
Sorao enthusiasts ot Humboldt, la., are
booming their honorable townsman, Frank
Gotcb, for governor. Aa the greatest catch-as-catch-can
wrestler the world ever knew, Gotch
ought to be equal to almost any kind of a campaign.
xttissT owrtsfbatksnn m llausjj
ssntsatartM. mmnaunm
i
In Other Lands
j Why be a pessimist Here Is a Chicago
man dancing jigs and singing songB on his war
to the gallows.
M juiynssrsflltj Sot cvtxdasM ?
mtu. AH lattsrfl
, Ity ecnar.
t-Hluf SnknlM Mrn.l Thanks.
BALTIMORE, Md., July 29. To the
Kuiior ot The Ilea: PloaM accept a vote
of thanks from the Baltimore Sokol
lilesk delegation of seventeen that par
ticipated In the recent Sokol competition
In Omaha for your prompt and accurate,
publication of tha details with unbiased
editorial.
We found It to be conducted by all up-to-date
methods and details In every par
ticular. We also thank the Omaha public for
the kind hospitality shown on every side
to the visitors, and I would especially
mention the Splcka's of Dorcas street for
the many favors tendered some of the
Baltimore delejratlon.
Omnha will lowr bo remembered by all
the Baltimore visitors.
FRANK J. ICADAN,
1702 East Eager Htrect,
Captain of Sokol Jed Bleak ot Baltimore.
A Typnsrraplilcnl Krror.
OMAHA, July 31. To the Editor of The
B.oa: I note a communication from
Jonathan Edwards captioned "Water
Board Discrepancies." In which Mr, Ed
watda suggests that tho figures of
lTJ.CTfl," given as a total of a half dozen
Items, several of which are many times
larger than the total of all, expresses
something new In accounting.
The, discrepancy noted Is purely an In
advertent and typographical one and must
have occurred in the office of the news
paper printing the statement.
The figures in the typewritten flnanclul
statement of the Metropolitan Water dis
trict furnished the newspapers show an
"6" in front of the figure printed In Tho
Bee on July 23, and this will make them
lead "8,19676.."
Tho figure escaped the compoilrc-r, but
the funds and properties comprising tho
JS,000,0()0 are being safely guarded by the
city treasurer and the officers and em
ployes ot tho Metropolitan WaWr district.
CIIAItLES It. SHERMAN,
Chairman Metropolitan Water Board.
Suffrage CSriir.roaUy.
QMAHA, July 31,-To the Editor ot The
Bqb: Mrs. Raymond Brown, president of
the New York State Suffrage association,
says In the Brooklyn Eagle, "Church
women should let church work rest In
the hands of the people who do not be
lieve In suffrage." The BUffraglsts pro
pose to turn over to the nntls not only all
the church work, but the charitable and
I'hllanthroplo work of the country, re
serving for themselves nothing but
l olitlcs. Such generosity on their part Is
cjulte touching. A speaker recently writ
ing that the vote be given to women raid;
"Wc Hhould welcome the help, advice and
counsel of tha efficient and practical
women of our country,"
But the efficient and practical women
ot our country are already giving help,
advice and counsel constantly and freely
In every worthy caum. They are not wait
ing for the vote to give their best efforts
to the country. What suffrage does Is to
put the vote Into the hands of the in
efficient Bnd Ignorant wohleh," "ahJl he
woman whose vote can be. bought., with,
which to offset and nullify the vote of
the Intelligent and public-spirited' woman.
Suffragists deliberately shut their eyes
to thin fact. In spite of tho successes ot
"Bath House John and H'ram QUI."
Bo(h of these officials would have been
elected by women's votes alone. So
widely known and well authenticated a
suffrage organ as Harper's Weekly In
la Issuo for April 25 printed an article
by Katheryn Buell, whom It had espe
cially commissioned as Its representative
to describe the Chicago election of April
7, In which sho points out a new political
"boss." who carries BOO votes In her hand
acd who, under the direction of her
"greasy," "low-down" husband turns
them over obediently to "Bath House
John."
This Is a new and Instructive glimpse ot
the possibilities of "women In politics."
NEBRASKA ASSOCIATION. OPPQSED
TO WOMAN SUFFRAGE.
Tkrt I.ocntloii for the University,
NORFOLK. Neb., July 3!.-To the Ed
itor ot The Bee: The real animus of the
university consolidation question Is little
understood by the people of the state.
Down at Lincoln tho department stores,
saloons and boarding houses appear to
think that the university should - remain -where
It now Is no matter what the peo
ple think. They seem to have the Idea
that the great school Is a sort ot finan
cial foot ball for them to profit from. As
proof It has leaked out from one high in
authority that there Is now raised and
paid In a campaign slush fund of 1 17,000
In cash to keep the university on the
down town location, If the above were
not true, why Is It that such hard working
patriots, who never work for nothing and
-who have no children at the university,
like Colonel V. D, Eager, C, Q. DoFrance
and one or two others have charge of the
Plate matter service and free advertising
they are now working oft on the country
press?
A few years ago a student entering the
university was required to pay a fee ot
Jo, which paid all requirements, Including
matriculation. During Governor Dietrich's
administration he saw fit to draw his
blue pencil through It and vetoed the uni
versity appropriation, or such part of it aa
he thought excessive. The university au
thorities were amazed at the governor's
action and ndopted clasa fees for studies
In all departments which coat the student
from S0 to $1C0 eaoh, 'When a subsequent
legislature came Into power appropria
tions were large enough to supply the
deficiency and a friendly governor al
lowed them to go through, but strangely
enough the class teea -were not put back
to the former basis.
The cost of consolidating the university
on the state farm would practically be
nothing, aa the cramped up site where It
now stands could be sold as inside prop
erty for the highest price, which would
more than pay any cost c moving. Then
If It should be rebuilt on land the state
already owns it would be modernised and
made a permanent beautiful university
for generations to come, and the persons
now opposing would be self-convicted aa
being against the betterment. There has
not been a logical reason advanced why
tha university ahould not be consolidated.
It will do the people of Lincoln as much
good on the state farm as where It now
Is. and who now are paying a double tax
to Its support.
Why not remove, Improve and enlarge
It to a place whor it will continue to
grow and be one of the leading Institu
tions of Its Wind in the country.
JOHN a PATTERSON
Tmxntlon for IVnr.
American tourists all over Europe are nodding
their heads wisely, remembering what other Ameri
can tourists have been reporting for months -as to
the enormous and steadily Increasing Durdens of tax
ation houldcred upon the people of Europe and the
try on "every hand, "War, war, war." It Is plain
now, If it ever wna otherwise, that this sucking of
the vitality from the people of these countries hod
for Its ultimate end the financing of the demon war.
It Is evident at last that tho tramp, tramp, tramp
of soldiers' feet on the soil of almost every power
of Europo was not merely a vain dress parade. The
drilling was purposeful. It meant war, sure and
swift. The tourist now perceives with fearful reality
that millions ot poor people have for these years been
wearying their minds and wearing their bodies all
for Uk one foul folly of war, eking out a mere ex
stenee by dint of hardest effort that thlr country
might satisfy its demand for more power or larger
domain, or that It might represa the noble ambitions
of some smaller and weaker nation, striving for In
dependence. And It makes Americans sick at heart.
Wherever one sees them that Is their expression at
the appalling spread of this devilish demon that
threatens In a moment to devour the best blood ot a
doien kingdoms. While timid tourists may be wish
ing they had' chosen another than the present for
the time of their European visit, those with a sense
for tho thrill and dream of life and a love for tho
historic' Interest, will nover cease thanking their
lucky- stars that, If such dovouring warfare must
have come it came while they were abroad. It will
do as the heirloom of many generations, to be tbld
and retold around many a fireside or steam radiator
In tho future. But, truth Is, tho average state ot
the average American mind In Europe now fs ono ot
consternation a,nd grier, that twentieth century civ
ilization should permit even the possibility ot what
now seems Imminent
Base Mall In Itrltnlu.
Say all you Jolly well like about the Englishman's
Inability to gather tho fine points ot our great Amer
ican game ot base ball and Its vexing vernacular, but
he Is coming to It In bally good shape. The other
day a team from tho midshipmen of the American
battleships, Missouri and Illinois, played a game ot
ball with a team ot American residents In London
at Shepherd's Bush stadium, tho middles winning
21 to S. In describing tha game a British correspond
ent observes: "There was throng of about 5,000
present, but the grounds were uneven, causing the
ball to bound badly, but, nevertheless, there were
spme flashes of rAal base ball and not too much
loose fielding." Of course, to an American fan any
loose Holding at all would be too much, but, then,
that does very well. Then again: "The midshipmen
never hsd to extend themselves and easily outbatted
and outflelded their opponents." And thU: "Mid
shipmen Smith of tho Missouri and McFalt of the
Illinois took turns at twirling." So It will be admitted
that base ball is catching on at last with Johnny
Bull. Five thousand out of London's T.W.OOi) is
going some.
Chlraaro Alderiuru In Paris,
Before they know that eve,n Clay Paree might
have to turn from its Epicurean coure In Ufa to the
grim business of wa.-, a few Chicago aldermen, to
gether with cthora constitutlnjs the city's civic com
mission of investigation, betook themselves to Paris
for the beginning of their tour of inspection. It did
not take the, honorable aldermen long to discover
some ot the "real centers of Parisian activity, but
among their more serious discoveries was this, ac
cording to the Chicago Tribune's statf correspondent.
"These soft-spoken, uavo officials appear to have
every phase and every necessity of a great city's life
at their fingers' tips.''- "What a shock to the average
American city alderman. Chicago doubtless Is hoping,
us tother American cities are, for the day when the
same may be said of the men they select to run the
.municipality.
.
JerusNlem's Knrly Water SiuyMr.
Archaeologists are manifesting much Interest In
the recent discovery by Baron Rothschild's excavat
ing party of a water canal at Ophel In Jerusalem,
southeast of Temple Place, which was older than the
famous cahal ot King Hexekiah. It was also on a
different land level. The discovery throws some light
on the early water supply of, Jerusalem. The
Rothschild excavations, as might be expected, are
still In progress. They are being earned on hy Cap
tain Reymond Weyl, who expect to make, the yet
more startling and valuable, discovery of the graves
of the kings of Judah, according to the archaeological
theories of dermont Oanneau.
Women's UnlTerstty In Jpnn.
Americana who Justly pride themselves on lead
ing In all good work that serves to exalt and advance
the cause ot womanhood may yet find something to
their advantage In the Wtomen's University of Toklo.
In the first place, It has more than 1,000 students
matriculated and sixty professors graduates from
Wellesloy, Csmbrlde, Yale, Harvard and the Japanese
universities. It haw a modern curriculum and a
little more, and here is the Interesting feature: It
gives practical Instruction In housekeeping, market
gardening, poultry raising and dairying. It has resi
dences so organized aa to represent to prospective
ho.me-makers the Ideal of the perfect home. The
students assume full charge of theso cottages under
the direction of a house mother,
People and Events
Count Alexander Roma, leader ot the Garibaldi
Legion during the last Balkan wur, died in Athens.
Josiah B. Andrews, known all over the country by
oil men as "Uncle SI," died at Pittsburgh, aged 11
years.
Sir Roger Casement of Dublin a a guest at the
convention of the Ancient Order of Hibernians at
Norfolk, Va.
Louis N. Parker, author ot "Dlsraoll." "Pomander
Walk" and other plays. Intends to make his future
home In the United States.
Justice Daniel AV. Doub of Hagerstown, Md.. in
police court, Imposed a fine ot upon himself for
causing a cabman to violate the traffic ordinance.
Tho duke and duchess of Connaught and Princess
Patricia will attend the annual regatta ot the North
western International Rowing association at Kenora,
Ontario.
Under an order of Bishop Thomas F. Lillls of
Kansas City, Mo., read In all Cathollo cnurch, flowers
will not be permitted at future funorals held In
churches of the diocese.
Tlwmas H. Ball, prohibition candidate for tho
democratlo noinlnaUon for governor ot Texas, who
was endorsed by President Wilson. Secretary Bryan
and Postmaster General Burleson, was defeated In tho
primaries.
The late Henry H. Rogers and the late Darlua O.
Mills were real millionaires, the estate of the one
being mSS, net, and the other $S,753,015. These
are the figures set by the New York transfer tax
appraisers.
J. Frank Howland of 3J0 Commonwealth avenue,
Dostcn. whose death at his country home In South
Paris, Me., is announced, was formerly president of
Walter Baker. & Co., Ltd., the old-time chocolate
manufacturir.gr''corapany In Boston and Milton. Mr.
Howland had a ahock of paralysis about two months
ago.
Darius Cobb, the aged Boston artist, believes that
bathing suits or lifted aklrts at muddy crossings are
more suggestive than nude art in the Boston art
museum. He declares: 1 'The purest men In the world
have given us paintings and statues entirely nude,
and I find tho purest men and women in the world
approve them."
In Dear Old Dublin
TOLD IN FUN.
New S'ork Commercial: This Is an un
timely hour for dissension at home when
tho whole of Europe Is ablaze with war
fever.
Baltimore News: The Dublin affray Is
likely to end all hope of agreement on
tho homo rule amending bill now pend
ing In Parliament.
Washington Post: Judging from the
casualties among women and children,
an Innocent bystander Is no safer In Dub
lin than elsewhere.
( Louisville Courier-Journal: The women
of Ulster nro arming themselves with
riries. As If Irish bullets could win a
field unconquerable to Irish eyes.
Detroit Free Press: Dublin demands
that the king's own Scottish borderers be
removed from the city and It Intends to
take a swipe nt them as they pass.
New York Times: Dublin's spirit is
naturally aroused and the homo rule
Imbroglio Is worse than ever, all through
a blunder which seems to have been in
excusable. St. Paul Dispatch: The episode in Dub
lln on Sunday will further aggravate the
situation and If more blood Is not split,
then Irishmen are less pugnacious than
they are reputed to be.
New York World: "More Arms Landed
In Ireland." Every increase of home
armament in Ireland will be taken as
strengthening the assurance of England's
neutrality In continental warfare.
fcprlngfield Republican: A triumphant
landing of 5.000 Irish Nationalist rifles In
County Wicklow may soften the bitter
ness cif the affair nt Dublin, but It does
not noticeably help the cause of peace.
Boston Transcript: Yt should the op
position coine Into power, the situation
In this particular case might bo worse
than it Is. The home rule bill has been
apparently so closa tu law that to have It
thrown back Into tho original welter
would arouse passions that it would take
more than Scotch borderers to restrain.
Wliero It Heli.
New York World.
Central Europe Is ovidently determined
to do all It can do better the market for
America's big crops of breadstuffs.
Ps tler.ee They were married at high
noon, I believe
Patrice Yes.
Patience Are they getting on nicely?
Patrice No; I believe she is not pleasea.
because he doesn't get homo sometimes
until high midnight. Yonkers Statesman.
'.'.lly Uie way," said Mrs. De Style.
"Year
"Do you know ot any poor persons who
would care for a discarded lorgnette?"
Puck.
Figg-Tho way ,of the transgressor Is
hard.
Fogg Yes; but tho trouble Is it Is gen
erally hard on somebody else. Boston
Transcript.
Wife What on earth are you wearing
that mourning band around your hat for''
"For your first husband I'm sorry he
died." London Opinion.
The Delegate I tell you, sir, that the
root of trouble of the educational system
ot this nation Is the teacher.
The Listener But, say, ain't you a
teacher yourself?
The Delegate (Indignantly) A teacher,
sir! Certainly not. I'm an educator!
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
"So you want to marry my daughter?"
said Mr, Cumrox.
"Yes." replied the young man. "I am
sure she loves me."
"That Isn't the consideration that most
affects your prospect of future happiness.
What you want to do is to find out
whether her mother like you." Washing
ton Star.
REPUBLICANS.
Blxby in Lincoln Journal.
The statesmen now from tar and near
Are with us for a spell:
Their voices I can plainly hear
Proclaiming "All Is well.-'
Two years aback It was not thus;
Invective was the style
7 he party had a little fuss
It could not reconcile.
One said the other was a fool,
By which great wrath was brewed.
And tales recited out of school
Indelicate end rude.
The big convention held one day
Broke up In quite a row.
And many statesmen walked awtr-
Tiiere's no such feeling now.
Today no man no man assails.
With language harsh and vile,
And perfeot harmony prevails
Among the rank and file.
And, knowing such to be the case,
You hereby have my word.
Republicans will win the) race
About November third.
Against 'Against f
Substitutes Imitations,
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