Nebraska Newspapers

    4-B
THE OMAHA SUNDAY BEE: JUNE 14, 1914.
ssTHE OMAHA SUNDAY BEE
S FOUNDED BY EDWARD ROSE WATER.
VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR.
The Beo Publishing: Company, Proprietor.
BEB BUILDING. FABNAM AND SEVENTEENTH.
Entered at Omaha, portofflca as second-class matter.
TERMS OP SUBSCRIPTION "
v By carrier Br mall
per month, per year.
sDally ana Sunday... f-$
3plly without Sunday....' o. Jj
.nlng and Sunday . .0C 6.00
.llhnnl Ktindn-r 26C 4.00
'Btm.v n only 3.OT
Prdfcitional Ethics.
At this particular scaeon of the year distin
guished members of all tho dlfferont professions
are engaged in picturing in commencement ad
dresses tho sacred mission and lofty Ideals of
tho sovoral callings which tho graduates are
about to take up. Thoy are endeavoring to Im
press the responsibilities and duties of tho law
yer, the doctor, tho toacher, tho minister of tho
gorpel, tho man of science, with a view to ele
vating and maintaining Htandards demanded by
tho ethics of the profession.
With such noble ideals before them, the
Sunday Bee only i wun such nonio ideals beiore Mom, the
SS&Mtr inVeuVefy to omSrttlon j novlUato ought to find It comparatively easy to
drrwrularity In delivery
Department.
BEMITTANCE. , ,
Remit by draft. express or postal order. Only two.
cent postage stamps received In payment or imall ac
count! Personal checks, except on Omaha and eastern
.exchange, not accepted.
OFFICES.
... rrx.. T T3(iI14Im
. South Omaha 2318 N street
council niuffo-14 North Main itreet.
Chlcaito-00X Itearat nulldlnff.
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COnnKSPONDENCD, "
JAAdrek communlcatlona rrtatlni? to netra and edi
torial matter to Omaha Bee. Editorial Department,
MAY 8 UN DAY CIRCULATION.
43,392
' State of Nebraska, County of Douglas, ta.
Dwlnht Williams, clrculotlon manager of The Bea
'Publishing company, being duly aworn, says that
the average Sunday circulation for the month of
"May, 1H. wan 4a.S92.
DWIOIIT WILLIAMS, Circulation Manager.
" Subscribed In my preaenco and aworn to betore me
Jthia Stli day of June. 1914
BOBEUT HUNTER, Notary Public.
1 Subscribers leaving tho city temporarily,
should have The Boo mailed, to thorn. Ad-'
"" dress will bo changed as often on requested.
... Skyscrapers on land are prosaic; thoy have
, them at sea now.
It's a tossup between tho Juno brldo and tho
Iswcet girl graduate.
And tho crop of June bugs, of ono Bort and
f knottier, is not so bad.
''',. 1
I The "Grass "Widow" 1b ono play, that 'need
v w a. vu awa
Still, thero must bo somdthlng' ;ln ,a home
Vhon Webb City gooflwot.
X,, li.!
I With the tolls tussle ended, what wU Vesu-
i viua Yard am an erupt about noxtT I
' ' ...
llot weather, wo are fold. Is playlnc havoc
with egg?. Any old excuso will do. '
thow may ,be a. lot of! vuUurcailnv Mexico.
.i. but doves aro said to bo very ecarco. '
j Whilo at.lt, ho mlght ns well havo gono down.
1 lunucum uun jih lua .njap inoro in oraor.... ,
All the school play day tournaments ever
pulled dff are not worth the. health of ono llttio
girl. ,
i Ak-Sar-Ben'a DevllaV hotel rogistor a 'pretty
j well crowded, but has room yot for a lot moro
IiltographB.- '. ' ' 4i
. What would -liapoon If those lmDrovement
flubs should bar offlcoholdors and office-seekers
from active membership?
travel a straight road, but, unfortunately, these
beautiful pictures are too often obscured by the
apparent succoss won by shady or crooked
mothods. While doubtless true In various
walks of life, the ovll scorns Just now to be par
ticularly ncuto among tho lawyers that the
rcputablo and honest lawyers, who always con
stitute the largo majority, manifest Indifference
to the degradation of the profession by legal
tricksters who manage to skim along the edgo
of respectability while resortlnc to all the ques
tionable tactics of nmbulanqe-chaslng, Jury
flxlng, blackmail and perjured frhmcup. To
set up for tho beglnnor a beautiful code of
ethics, constantly and flagrantly violated with
out the slightest effort at enforcement, tends
only to make for hypocrisy, If not malpractice,
fthd unless tho remedy Is applied cannot fall to
harm rather than to help.
Bourke Cochran holds tho undisputed dls-1
Mnctlon of having belonged to moro political
j parties than 'any o'thor Amorlcan colobrlty.
' "
3 A mnkMrl lnw.. writ.. , n , 1. i .
I v. "i.tvD u wiuuit us lor
jfvlng him so much free-advertising. -Of course,
u uuuuoi lajrgr couia noi ubo mat Kind. .
A French horse ownnd hv nn AmArlinn - win A
w v aw44 II IUU
Hho British dorby, showing how fast tho causo
lor internationalism is speeding on lta way..
!
I That brlbory plot is suro to bo unravelod
j despite denials of tho arch conspirators caught
;ln tho meahoa that thoy over had anything to
Ho wjth It,
If George W. Perkins is thrown ororboard,
who will feed th ahlpT Munsey is gone,
Hanna is gone. Boss. Plinn Burely cannot, keep
it going alone, . , ,
The Wealthy West.
A correspondent of a Philadelphia newspaper
Is amazed at tho continued Increase In tho ubo
of automobiles In the west. Ho Ib dumfounded
at a slnglo ordor for 1,000 cars by ono Omaha
dealer. It porsuados him to bcllevn that tho'
end of tho "auto crazo" Is not yot In Bight.
Tho auto Is not regarded as a crazo in the
west. But tho point of chief interest in tho
observation is tho apparent misconception of
tho wost, all too extensive In tho provincial cast.
Our friends back thore need to adopt tho "Pee
America First" slogan. Thoy aro ignorant of
tho best and most prosperous part of tholr own
country. Autos in tho west! Why, Los An
gojes county, California, with its 60,000, has
ton times as many autoa as tho entire stato of
Malno, whllo Nobrahka heads th0 whole list of
states In ratio of autos to population.
Hero In tho wost now wealth Is boine nrn-
Lduced on such a prodigious scalo that tho east
simply nas no adequate conception of It. East
ern' folks, in tho first place, do not sufficiently
rcallzo the area and fortuity of our soli, tho
unsurpassed facilities of trado and transporta
tion. They know, of courso, how susceptible
tho eastern half bf tho country is to tho first
attack of a business depression, but do not un
derstand how tho same condition affects tho
west loss. That is why it astonishes eastern
friends io learn that wo of tho west aro ablo to
go on swelling our orders for automobiles.
Greece and Turkey.
.Tho opunky llttio kingdom of Greoco throws
down the gauntlot ta the burly Turk -with a vlr
tuoncry for war Unless Dorsocutlon of nronku
twHhln Turkey ceases at once, and ln vlow of
j-Cktlve' taBUlta oi ho lato Balkan war It 1b
nnnj X KkffJL.J- . i. ...
u yuiiuyu win uo no noatiHtioa.
Orooco camo out ..of tho Bosphoroud' turmoil
much hotter comparatively than Turkv ,n,i t
lias improved its opportunities slnco to fortify
naoif.agalnBt repetition of Turkish outrages.
- But thero Is another and moro interesting
feature of Greece's action to Americans, who
have boon pursuing tho swoot doIIcv of watch
ful waiting in Mexico. American citizens Buf
fered all kinds of humiliation, hardship, torturo
and death at the hands of Mexican outlaw, nni.
dlors and others", under contemptuous powors-
inui-Do, Dotlrrohol' and federal, and our govern
ment moroly protested and askod that such
depredations .cease, and whon its kind requests
woro ignored contented itself with hopefully
watching and waiting.
Tho world canncTholp but admlro tho bold
stand taken by Httlo Greece and it is 'apt to
have .tho' desired effect ontho haughty old Turk.
No need now to arguo the question of Presi
dent Wilson's powor to boss his party! Just ro-t
fer to tho fact that ho' made Its representatives'
la congress repudiate tholr national platform
fledge on free tolls.
When Is a platform not a, platform? Give
It up? Why, whon it Solemnly pledges frob
canal tolls for American coastwiso shipping
that competes with the railroads it moana Just
the opposite of what it says.
Tho fee grabbing in the court houso must
SO. Had tho officer, who is not contont with
tho salary attaching to tho office, announcod
before he was eloctod that ho intendod to pockot
all tho fees and pehjulsltea he could' get his
hands on he wpuld not bo there.
roMiztt rmOM ode ricj
A trottln aaaoelaUoo was organised by local horse
lovers to hold a speed meet In July. Tho following
re the officers: President, n. Kitchen; vice presl.
dent. Samuel Shears; treasurer, D. T. Mount; secre
ry, J. 1L McShane; assistant secretary, H. B. Potter,
The ball gam arranged to be played between the
"Fats" and the "Leans" of h lTninn n.ni,i. ...
quarters did not take place, owing to the nonappear-
um wic iirBi-meniionea club.
Another out-of-town wedding of Interest to Omaha
Is that of Charles E nuk unit xii.. r . . .
. --- ' livings oi
Plattsmouth. which took place at the homo of the
unao a parents. According to the account, "the bride
presented a handsome appearance In a whit- satin
O L .....
ouui uernnarot style, with underskirt of
unen lawn, ana white flowers at her walat. neck and
, a ncr nair.
juiisea uisncne and Alii Wlthnell aro visiting
friends In St Louis.
Bev. J. W. Stewart has gone to Tork to attend th
commencement exercises at the college and also win
Visit Ws daughter. Mrs. J. It Bell at Aurora,
Th Thurston hose team returned from uti Moines,
wncre roey were snut out or the sweepstakes race
noi to do so treated tney Joined forces with the
""boi uiuiia cQmpany under the name of the
vsusnn nose company of Council Bluffs, which
"Ma out a ikw pnie. or which they took half.
North American leadership.
The noted Toronto editor and.nrntni. 3. A.
Macdonald, who spends much of his tlmo on-this
smo or mo jine, writes with characteristic vision
of-'"North America's World Leadership," as tho
rallying cry of "theao two Engllsh-Bpcaklng na
tlons.'.' He refers. to the. United States and Can
ada, which at onco makes "nations" tho impor
tant word. Canada as a nation is tho way the
Canadian looks at it, bo he ever bo zealous to
uphold publicly, lilo homage for tho mother
country. Dr. Macdonald does not speak of sep
aration, much less of annoxatlon, but what ho
says loaves llttio room for doubting that his
vision leads off into a day. of. larger national
ism for the Dominion of Canada.
Tho chiof point of his argumont Is, howovor.
that Canada and tho United StateB aro to stand
together though under different governments
on the same piano bearing a common respon
sibility for tho'guaranty of lifo and stability of
government in Mexico and all Central America
and for a world leadership. . in this world lead
ership ho concedes to tho Unitod States the
placo bt pro-omlnenco, "not because of its physi
cal area, not because of its boundless resources
and not because of the more numbers of iu
population. This is the distinction of this re
public, that in their struggle for independence,
tho thirteen colonies wlilch at first mado up the
United States learned this lesson for themselves
and taught it to all other nations. This leeson
domocracy must learn today as surely as mon
archy had to learn It in tho past that any col
ony that desires to bo free and Is fit to be free
must bo given freedom's unfettored chance; any
people who desire self-government and are fit
for self-government, must be granted the rights
and tho responsibilities of self-government,"
And how about Canada? Well, whether
Canada desires actual autonomy, free from even
tho formal restraints of Britain or not, Dr. Mao
donald only refers to it as "tho bond and pledge
of Anglo-American unity," but to Great Britain
note this as a democratic empire which is
significant in view of the lesson democracy
must learn. It does not matter bo much so long
as Canada and our nation continue to servo man
kind as tho common inhorltors and therefore
common purveyors of a common civilization. In
that light,' it is easy to see and appreciate' tho
vision of tho Canadian and to trace tho lines of
this Anglo-American influence as they lengthen
and entwine themselves about, not only Pan
America, but tho lands of tho world.
An Undying Flame.
If the true upark of religious and civil liberty t
kindled, It will burn. Human agentfy cannot extln
gulMi It. Like the earth's central fire, It may be
smothered for a time; the ocean may overwhelm It;
mountains may press It down; but Its Inherent nnd
unconquerable force will heave both the ocean and the
land, and at some time or other, In some place or
other, the volcano will break out and flame up to
heaven.
Daniel Webster spoke those words in his
famous address at tho Bunker Hill monument
eighty-nine years ago. Tho spark was klndlod,
tho ocean Waves have risen and roared tho
mountains rumbled, but tho flro burns. Civil and
religious liberty lives today in tho heart of every
patriot. Bigotry Is not dead, Intolerance now
and then speaks out, but no man or Institution
has thus far dared assail this bulwark of Amer
ican freedom and nono over will, In our Judg
ment, bo long aB tho American preserves his
original Bonso of tho proportion of things.
Tho periodical expressions of sectarianism
aligned on two sides of a great divide have never
mado much of an Impression on tho rational
mind, for tho reason that it is Invincibly rooted
In tho conviction that this principle has been
permanently established In tho United States,
that this spark was kindled and now burns a
living flro in tho breast of all freemen. Not
wealth, power, territorial aggression or con
quest brought tho fathers of America to tho
shores of Now England. They camo, thoso
sturdy pioneers of a new world of democracy,
for the single purposo of seeking a refuge from
intolerance and for religious and civil liberty.
Tho legend runs that when Troy was com
pleted the Trojans invoked tho benediction of
tho gods, imploring a sign as a seal of approval
and safoty and a wooden Image of Pallas, the
god of war and wisdom, fell In their midst.
Thoy conceived the bollef that, so long as they
preserved this Pallas which thoy called their
Palladium Inviolate, Troy would stand and
wax strong. So it did till one night during tho
Greok Invasion old DlomedeB and Ulysses stole
away with tho Palladium and Troy foil. A par
tial analogy has boon found between this legond
and tho early Amorlcan settlors. But thlB far
It seems truo, that so long as we preserve In
aafoty this Palladium of religious and civil lib
erty, so long will tho nation built around it
Btand and wax strong.
The President's Personal Friends.
In tho governor of the new reserve bank
board tho president has added another to his
long list of personal -friend appointees. Llko
many of tho others, Thomas B. Jones Is also a
former professional associate, having been a
trustee of Princeton whllo Mr. Wilson was pres
ident of the university.
Taking tho president at his word as Intend
ing to select tho best mon avallablo for office,
are we to assume that such material is to bo
found almost exclusively within thq circle of his
porsonal friends and collego .associates? So far
as known nono of theBo men has fallod signally
In giving good account of hlmsolf In his public
j08ltlon, and yet It Is hard to bollovo that
cquully efficient public sorvants might not bo
found among many others who had novor en
Joyed tho -private llfo or professional relations
with President Wilson.
Seriously, though, Is not tho logic of the
situation this, that the president has assiduously
contrived to build about himself a machine
which has tho effect of being very largely per
sonal, every part and detail of which he con
trols? Even thnl mfsrh't
-o - , - ..a ..u..uiu,CT,
and It might also have lta disadvantages. To
say tho least, It tends to place a severe restric
tion upon tho area of patronage distribution.
Whether this in turn may have a deleterious
offect for tho president's political fortunes Ib
another quostlon. Close corporations do not
always prove tho most successful In politics.
SECULAR SHOTS AT PULPIT.
Comfort and Style.
Is tho chasm between comfort and stylo
growing wider or narrower? Or, to put tho
question in another way, aro thoso who make
tho styles for us aiming to accommodate them
to our physical easo, or disregarding tho ele
ment of comfort altogether? Tho styles aro cer
tainly froaklsh enough, and constantly chang
ing, but tho general verdict is that the changes
are in the direction, of comfort. Folks may
rest aBsurod that it Is possible to bo both stylish
and comfortable at ono and tho samo time. In
asmuch as most peoplo would feel uncomforta
ble if not in style, tho problom plainly Is to ac
commodate tho styles to the demands of comfort,
demands that chango and keep changing with
tho locality, the- seasons, tho popular amuse
ment and a hundred other varying factors.
Muoh in Little.
Is it the high cost of living which oppresses
us, or is it tho cost of high living;? ThiB is not
a now question, nor la It put In a new way, but
possibly some new light may bo reflected on tho
subject by this extract from an article In ono of
tho current scientific magazines:
In 1880 there was one considerable candy shop
In New York, while today there is one such shop In
nearly every business block. The leading confec
tioner today is said to pay an annual rental of 175,
000 for his ahop. His manufactory Is elsewhere.
It ha been said that the people of the United
States now spend $75,000,000 on candy, $S5,000,000
on chewing gum and $310,000,000 for soda water.
Pretty big figures for llttio things. Thero
Is real food in them to digest and ponder over.
District Court Clerk nobert Smith explains
now that what ho meant whon ho told tho peo
ple he would reform that office was that he
would collect tho fees belonging to tho county
Just as energetically and conscientiously as ho
would collect the fees ho expected to pocket for
hlmsolf. Explanation accepted.
Let It be noted that wo now have tho United
Improvement clubs organized to combat the
Federated Improvement clubs, with the pur
poso of a long pull, a strong pull, and A pull
all together for Omaha lu danger of being com
pletely obliterated.
Yuma, Ariz., again holds the record for be
ing the hottest spot in the United State's. It is
gratifying to know that there Is no nature fak
ing in Marshall P. Wllder's story about the de
ceased citizen fit Yuma who returned to get hla
overcoat
Washington Pout: Southern Methodists
have decided that no tobacco-using can
didates for the ministry will be ordained
hereafter; however, there are some
brands of cigarettes that can bo .n
dulged In without breaking the rule.
Brooklyn Eagle: A Montclatr clergyman
asks his rarlihloncrs to send In texU
they would like him to preach from. We
cannot Imagine a subtler plan for a
renaissance of Bible reading. He deserves
universal congratulation on wholly In
nocuous Ingenuity.
New York World. Tho rresbyterlan
assembly clings to the old blue law at
titude toward Sunday games. It Is all
very well to advocate Saturday half-holidays
for the worklngmen barred by Its.
mlo from "all" Sunday recreation. BJt
why should he not have both? As a
matter of fact he does. Blue Sunday
gradually yields to the Inevitable.
Baltimore American: The Invasion ot
churches during times of worship seems
to bo the straw which has broken the
camel's back of public tolerance towards
the English militant suffragettes. This
desecration of things sacred has crys
tallized the anger growing towards tha
"wild women."
Philadelphia Ledger: The burning of
historic and ancient churches, the de
struction of works ot art that cannot
be replaced, the whipping of officials,
smashing men on the head with hatchets
nnd other crimes, will not win voles
for women In1 England, but they may
result In very seriously handicapping the
efforts which high-minded women in
other parts of the world are making to
secure the ballot.
Philadelphia Becord: The Methodist
Book Concern has celebrated Its one hun
dred and fifth anniversary In a striking
and very kindly way. It has given each
of lta 1,000 employes an, Insurance policy
for ono year s salary, under the so-called
roup plan of Insurance. Nothing Is more
characteristic of the present period than
the Interest of tho large corporations In
tho welfare ot their employes. This Is
manifested In many ways, and certainly
no way Is more useful than to give each
person employed a little llfo Insurance
for ha protection of his family.
MUFFLED KNOCKS.
If all our prayers were answered no
body would be willing to work.
A business woman la ono who can wrtto
a note without chewing on the end of the
pencil.
What has become of the old-fashlonod
boy who had to do chorea around the
houso?
This Is a fine world. Worrying makes
you grow bald and growing bald makes
you -worry.
After a man has been married a while
ho gets so that ho likes B-cent-clgars bet
ter than 10-ccnt ones.
All men may bo born equal. But that
only lasts until they are strong enough
to take nourishment out of a bottle.
Another reason for tho high cost of
living is that every tlmo a man gets up
a sweat he wants to etriko for more pay
and less work.
Thero are lots of husbands in tho world
who do not drink, smoke, chew or gam
ble, and they are Just as flat broko oil
tha time as tho husbands who shoot tho
moon.
it a man and woman aro walking along
tha street and aho' stops to look Into a
window and he keeps on until he Is a
square ahead of her, you can bet that
they are married. 4
It used to be that when there were
three or four girls In tho family the
clothesline used to sag down under the
weight ot the family washing. But
nowadays It Is a tight rope with a few
flimsy gauze trifles flying in the breeze.
A woman will spend half her life beat
ing the kids because they wear out the
furniture and make It look old. And,
after they grow up, If the old man has
mad.e a stake, she pays nine prices for
antique furniture that looks as though
it had been used by the animals In the
ark. Cincinnati Enquirer.
WIRELESS FLASHES.
Ho who gains time gains everything.
The vain man Is the really solitary
man. '
Wit makes Its own welcome and lovelt
all distinctions.
Silence- Is the resolve ot him who dis
trusts himself,
Besponslblllty walks hand In hand with
capacity and power.
Self-confidence Is tho first requisite to
great undertakings.
When a man Is no longer anxioJs to
do better than well, be is done for.
The talent of success Is nothing more
than doing what you can do well.
Planners Carry the world for the mo
ment; character (for all time.
A man without self-restraint Is like a
barrel without hoops, and tumbles to
pieces.
Find out what your temptations ate
and you wilt rind out what largely you
are yourself.
There Is nothing In which men moro
deceive themselves than In what tny
call zeal. .
Every' Individual has a place to Ml In
tho world, and is Important In some re
aped, whether he chooses to be so cr njt.
Wireless Age.
WHITTLED TO A POINT.
But tho best policy Is one that Is
Paid up.
Tears are often moro effective than the
most eloquent words.
Don't you feel sorry for a married
man who talks In his sleep?
When nature stores a lot of brains be
hind a pretty face watch out!
Those who win success by practice
haven't time to do much preaching.
Some men will do more for a cheap
cigar than they will for a dollar.
A pessimist Is a man who doesn't be
lieve that clouds have silver linings.
Many a man who has a way of his own
has a wife who outweighs him.
We can see where the minority Is In
the right when we are of the minority,
No man ever lived long enough to un
derstand why his neighbors dislike him.
Necessity is the mother of Invention,
but she isn't always , proud ot her off
spring. Kven some lasy men may get busy, but
the trouble Is that they don't keep busy.
The average man Isn't ashamed to do
a lot ot things he would be ashamed to
be caught doing.
It the average man could only sell the
advice he gives away It would keep him
busy counting hla coin.
Breathes there a woman with soul V
dead that she can resist reading an ar
ticle on "How to Be Beautiful?"
Anyway, when a man aoeuses his wife
ot having married htm for his money
he paya tribute to her good sente. Chi
cago News.
I
People and Events
After tho first of July an official per
mit will be necessary to put ginger In the
grape Juice ot the American navy.
One of the melancholy freaks of fate is
the case ot a St Louis veteran ot two
wars who died from being hit on the
head with a can of bears.
"All quiet at Vera Crus" is tho dally
bulletin from the front Nevertheless the
Mexlean weather man Is giving the army
and navy a first-class roast
Denver has a "human encyclopedia," a
youth of twenty summers who succeeded
in answering all questions put to htm but
one: "What happened to Maud when the
light went out?"
Francis A. Ogden, an aged hermit ot
Austin, Texas, unable to put a pocket in
his shroud left a fortune of $1,000,000 for
unknown heirs to scrap over. The legal
profession, too, comes In for some fat
picking.
Women In Pittsburgh, who play cards
for money, have been warned by the au
thorities that they are liable to be run In
Just the same as mero man caught with
the chips. Equal rights are also hedged
with equal penalties.
She was Minnie Burch when she was
younp, Inhaling th lake breeze and other
atmosphere if her native Chicago. Now
at 61 she is tho second lady of the French
republic, wife of Alexandra Rlbot, the
new prime minister ot France.
A distinct sigh of relief is felt In dra
matic quarters over tho assurance that
Sara Bernhardt will not play tho role of
Juliet In htr coming round-the-world fare
well tour. Her preference for "Shylock"
seems more appropriate for the occasion.
The attempt of a Mlssourlan to improve
on muscullne fashions In Omaha was not
as successful as daring genius deserved.
To the credit of the show-mo lot It be said
that a pink sporting page trdusers Is a
shade moro picturesque than tho sil
houette slit skirt Let It go at that
MUSINGS OF A CYNIC.
It's tho black sheep that generally
paints tho town rod.
No man is so selfish as to keep all his
popularity to himself.
Tha best thing with which to feather
your own nest la cash down.
Nono are so blind as those who don't
believe anything thoy don't sec
Every stage has wings, but that isn't
what makes the chorus girls fly.
The man who is well balanced iff nat
urally the ono who Isn't easily upset.
What will the suffragettes do about tho
proverbial offlco that seckB the man?
Tho ball player shouldn't think so much
of settling old scores as of making new
ones.
One good turn may deserve another, but
sometimes It's a mighty long time be
tween turns.
Every old maid says she is single from
choice, but she doesn't tell you from
whose choice.
Men arc such helpless things. Thoy
can't even fall in love without a good bit
of assistance.
Women never really admire each other.
They aro too busy admiring each other's
clothes.'
For every man who succeeds In bottling
his wrath there's another fellow who is
a corkscrew.
Many a man's color scheme in life Is
based on a belief that red liquor is an
antidote for the blues. New Tork Times.
ABOUT WOMEN.
Mrs. Russell gave $10,000 the other day'
towards tho JIOO.OOO being raised for a
fund to aid In the protection of migratory
birds, tho director of the New Tork Zoo
logical park having the matter in charge.
Fifty thousand dollars of the fund has
now been contributed.
Dr. John W. Butler, head of the Metho
dist Episcopal mission In Mexico, says
that Mexican women are as a rule men
tally and morally superior to the men.
They are anxious for an education, he
says, and are coming into the mission
schools, and they are very beautiful
women. N
Mrs. James W. Orr, president of the
California Federation of Women's clubs,
says that the clubwomen of her state are
working for the Introduction and estab
lishment of vocational guidance and
training In the public schools. They
wish to make permanent a woman'
council "which shall unify, dignify and
direct the power ot organized women in
the state."
One of tho interesting subjects that will
be discussed at the Chicago biennis of
the General Federation of Women's
Clubs. Is "How Can We Bring the In
fluence of Beauty and Art to the Children
of America?" Among those who will
speak on the subject will be: Mrs. Her
man Hall, Mrs. Everett Tattlson, 3Cra
Harry L. Keefe and Mrs. John B. ar
wool.
At the thirty-first annual convention of
tho Women's General Missionary Society,
ot the United Presbyterian church, Mrs.
Mary Clokey Porter of Pittsburgh an
nounced that the women had raised ISO,
CCO for a girls' boarding school at Tanta,
Egypt The women have have already
erected a hospital there and raised more
than the amount of money required for
the school.
PASSING' PLEASANTRIES.
"Does your wife ever tell you that she
might have married a millionaire If she -hadn't
thrown herself away on you?"
"No; I escape that My wife's folks were
poor people. Sho never saw a millionaire
until we had been married nine years."
Louisville Courier-Journal.
"Why are there so many attacks mado
In this Panama canal business?"
"I suppose It Is because where the dig
ging of a big ditch Is concerned. It Is the
most natural thing In the world for people
to be throwing mud." Baltimore Ameri
can. "Mamma.."
"Tea, daughter."
"Who was Cinderella?"
"Why. Cinderella, my child, was the
first female to get a No. 4 foot Into a No.'
2 shoe, I believe." Yonkcrs Statesman.
Rich Uncle It grieves me to think that
my money will pass Into spendthrift hands
like yours when 1 die.
Wild Nephew Well, don't worry, undo.
It won't stay there long. Boston Tran
script. "Any fish here?"
"Yep," replied the small boy. "But I
don't believe you'll catch any."
"Whv not?"
"Well, these are what you might call
intelligent fish. When they see a. lot o'
handsome flshln' tackle like yours, they
get to swlmmln round and admlrln' It
until they lose their appetites for bait."
Washington Star.
"This reminds me of some of the pies
I knew in my happy childhood days," said
the man without a heart.
"The kind your mother used to
make?"
"No. The kind we chtldren would
make out of mud." Washington Star.
"What did papa say when you asked
him for my hand?"
"Ho didn't say anything. He fell on
my next and wept" Boston Transcript.
The Boss (to a laborer who had come
for employment) Are you a mechanic?
The Laborer No, sir; I'm a McCarthy.
Yale Record.
"I got this cup for running."
"Whoja beat?"
'The owner and six policemen." Har
vard Lampoon.
V
THE NAME OF "OLD GLORY."
James Whltcomb Riley In "Home Folks."
Old Glory I say, who
By the ships and the crew.
And the long, blended ranks of the Gray
and the Blue
Who gave you, Old Glory, the name that
you bear
With such pride everywhere.
As you cast yourself free to the raptur
ous air.
And leap out full length, as we're want
ing you to?
Who gavo .you that name, with the ring
of the same,
And the honor and fame so becoming to
you?
Your stripes stroked in ripples of white
and of red,
With your stars at their glittering best
overhead
By day or by night
Their dellghtfulest light
iaughing down rrom tneir little square
heaven of bluet
Who gavo you the name of Old Glory
say who
Who gave you the name' of Old Glory?
The old banner lifted and faltering then
In, vague lisps and whispers fell silent
again.
Old Glory: the story they're wanting to
hear
Ts what the plain facts ot your christen
ing were
For your name Just to hear it,
Repeat it and cheer it, is a tang to the
spirit
As sait as a tear
And seeing you fly, and the boys march
ing by.
There's a shout In the throat and a blur
In the eye,
And an aching to live for you always or
die,
If, dying, we still keep you waving on
high.
And so by our love
For yoy, floating above.
And the scars of all wars and the sorrow
thereof,
Who gave you the name of Old Glory,
and why
Are we thrilled by the name of Old
Glory?
Then the old banner leaped like a sail In
the blast
And fluttered an audible answer at last.
And It spake with a shake of the voice,
and It said:
By the driven snow-white and the living
blood-red
Of my bars and their heaven of stars
overhead
By the symbol conjoined of them all,
Bkyward cast
As I float from the steeple or flap at the
mast.
Or droop o'er the sod where the Ions
grasses nod
My name Is as old as the glory ot God.
So I came by the name of Old
Glory.
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WsY&AitfP frmiwwwwiiMiiiit liiirXkAsy
I I & A N & A &
WHY
IS
OMAHA?
FOLLOW any of her 17 railroads 100 miles and
you have the answer. It's the rich farming ter
ritory from Chicago to the TJockies and from Fargo
to Kansas City with its educated fanners, high
priced farms and 'bumper crops that have made
Omaha.
These farm homes buy immense quan
tities of all advertised goods and they
are easily susceptible to advertising.
Apply this condition and fact to your
business. Use this rich, easily acces
sible market.
Reach these homes through
Missouri River Valley's great
est weekly farm paper Twen
tieth Century. Farmer.
Circulation, 108,000; display
rate, ouc per agate line; ciassi
fled rate, 5c a word.
TWENTIETH CENTURY
FARMER
OMAHA, - NEBRASKA
m
SIVniF mil
ASH
FOR
'SAMPLB
COPY