TilE BEE: OMAHA, TLESUAV, 1'E13UL Altl 24, 1U14.
t.
i
THB OMAHA DAILY BEE
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VICTOR ROHBWATKR, EDITOR.
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JANUARY CIRCULATION.
50,542
Elate of Nebraska, County of Dolifclas, as.:
D wight Williams, circulation ihanaser
ot Tne Bee Publishing company, being
duly sworn, says that tho average dally
circulation for the month o! January,
1914. vas K,5.
DWICJHT WILUAMS,
Circulation Manager.
Subscribed In my pretenca and sworn to
pecoro me una 3d day ot trcoruary, iai
ROBERT HUNTER,
(5eL) Notary Public
Sahscxibera lenvlas; tho cltr tem
porarllr ahoalil hnre The Be
mailed to them. Address '111 be
changed mm often am roqnestea.
Tho Auto show alone Justifies tho
Auditorium.
Whero Is tho man who was longing
tor a good old-fashloncd winter?
This snow puts "the arallo that
won't come oft" on the face of tho
winter wheat grower.
Inow is tho time to repeat our
declaration that wo have no torrltor-
II al designs upon Mexico.
Now Is tho tlmo for all good men
to speak up for their country and
help Kill tho lltoracy test.
Hut Castillo, tho noted Mexican
bandit, Btlll enjoys tho aafoty nnd
(comfort of an American prison.
At any rato, Mayor "Jim" has a
"versatile anibltion sheriff, mayor,
ifiovornor or congressman It does
not raako much difference
Becauso bo many lawyers are tol
erant of tho crooks In their own pro
fession Is no good roasou why all tho
crooked lawyors should have an lm-
bnunity hath.
Slowly but surely tho democrats of
the north. aro being forced to reallzo
that they aro merely playing pigtail
to the democrats of the south who
aro in the saddle.
Now, they havo gono and censored
tho massacre out of tho raovlo deplet
ing the last Btnnd of Custer and his
forces, which must leavo it like Hani
let without Hamlet.
"Tho Voice of Spring" Is tho title
of an article in tho Independent
How timely for people who hare Just
been listening to tho gentle prattle
of that Uttlo nor'westor.
Joseph "V. Folk Bays tho Wilson
.Administration has unhorcd in tho
"golden ago" of democracy. Ho evi
dently feels Buro ot getting Sonator
Stonp's toga away from him.
Tho Chicago base bail magnato
takes up a column to explain why ho
is out, when as a former nowspaper
man ho might havo covered the story
with tho one Uttlo word, "ousted.'
The only effect of tho blizzard on
tho Auto show is to relnforco the
argument that the auto is an abio
luto necessity for such emergencies
In every well regulated household.
In connection with thd federal ap
propriation of 50P,0D0 to fight hog
cholera, it is interesting to recall
that scientist's nssortlon that doves
carry, germs of this disease. So the
administration may only bo trying to
do what It can to chock tho mischief
of Mr. Bryan's birds.
The city of Omaha 1b paying out
around $30,000 a year for collecting
garbage turned over freo of cost to
tho hog-fccdlng contractors which
tho latter used to pay out of their
own pocket. Wonder If this Is not
a clue to the suddenly aroused oppo
uttion to garbage incineration.
Armed Intervention In Mexico, although
It la the last thing desired by President
"Wilson or congress. Is now clearly lore
thadowed as tho result or tho latest de
velopments In the southern republic
New York Herald.
As the Horald Is a strong sup
porter of the present administration
and has borno tolerantly with Its do
nothing Mexican policy, its opinion
may bo entitled to added weight.
if tho utrcet railway company suc
cessfully establishes Its position that
the city cannot legally cut its fares
by forcing the sale of seven tickets
for a quarter, it may next contest
tho jpwer of the city to cut its fareu
pv forcing payment of a percentage
or tne receipts as an occupation tar.
Once depart from the principle of
home rule snd there is no certain
stopping point.
A Man Who Made History.
Becauso in his later years no
longer prominently In tho public oye,
D. Clem Deavor, whoso death has
Just been chronicled, was a man who
helped mako history, for without
him tho political nnnals of Nobraskn
would not read as they do. Mr.
Doaver rose to fame on the wave of
tho Knights of Labor and the Farm
ers' Alllanco that culminated in tho
organization of the populist party,
In which ho became a leader. In
recognition of his services Governor
Holcomb named him on the Omaha
Board of FJro and Police commls-j
doners iu that period of stress and!
storm when the contest over tho po
lice board waged so furiously that it
tested tho fighting mottle to the
core.
Later, Mr. Dearer stood out
ncalnst tho demo-pop fusion, which
ho clearly foresaw would mean the
swallowing of tho populists by the
democrats, and through the "mlddlo-of-the-road"
movement contributed
potentially to tho "redemption of Ne
braska" In 1000. Tho rlrulence of
tho democratic attack upon him, par
ticularly when ho accepted a land
office appointment under President
McKinlcy, testified to the forceful
ncss and effectiveness of his work.
Hr gavo up that office to tako the
position of Industrial commissioner
of tho Burlington. His career Is a
wonderful ezaraplo of what a poor
boy, with meager educational equip
ment and no resources but his own,
can do by porslstent and honest en
deavor. The Blizzard.
Elemental disturbances with heavy
snows in tho east and engulfing rains
along tho Pacific last week cul
minated Sunday In a gcnulno blizzard
sweeping tho continent from tho
Ilocklott to Now England. In parts
of somo of tho central Btates it Is re
ported as the Bevorost of official
record; in all parts of tho country it
Bpont itself with far moro fury than
nnythlng felt this winter. Indeed,
tho severity of It was so groat bo
causo It camo at almost tho end of an
unusually mild winter, with the coun
try languishing In tho bollof that Old
Boreas had quit tho Job and lot us off
easy for this time.
An with all such winter storms,
much suffering ensues and much aid
is promptly at hand. Temporary dis
tress is relieved as far as possible and
for tho most part, especially In states
llko Nebraska, wo find tho bonofltB
outnumbering tho burdens in tho
wnko of tho storm. For thoso who
llko to cBtlmato the valuo ot deep
snows In forthcoming wheat crops
and hay harvests and grazing for
llvo stock, hero is occasion for delight
ful occupation. In the lucantlmo re
moval of the snow- banks along city
streets has its compensation on tho
Bido of employment of otherwise Idle
men.
Virtue of Deceit.
It would shock tho tenderest sensi
bilities of right and wrong to say
there was morit In decelttulness, and
yet who dooB not know that, whether
professing It or not, wo practlco tho
principle of. tho virtue ot deceit in
diplomacy, politics, business and
oven ordinary social Intercourse?
Between nations it is almost a slno
qua non of smooth-running relations
to color or conceal facts, to foster
falso protensos. Throughout the
long administration of Porflrlo Diaz
AmorlcanB had a way, officially at
least, ot alluding to Mexico as our
"groat and good friend," to Presl
dlal neighbor. And ho was por
sonally on friendly tonus with our
government moat of tho tlmo, but
it wero folly for the United States to
havo pretended that tho Mexicans as
a people wero friendly to us; they
never havo been, Perhaps it was
wlso and beat for us to practice tho
pretense, but Burely tho mask Is
ompletoly torn away by now. And
this ugly grlmnco of hato and con
tempt on tho faco of our neighbor Is
not now; It appears so only becauso
we see tho real faco of Mexico now
Instead of tho disguise. Tho scorn
ful term, "Gringo," dates back even
beyond the reign of the old Iron
Ruhr,
The virtue of our deceit, it such
thoro has been, lies In the honest,
porslstent effort ot our country to bo
decent with Mexico nnd build up a
relationship of genulno friendship.
But we have been wastln' 'io sweet
ness ot tho flower ot out ...c&ls upon
the hot desert sands oi Ignorance
and senii-savagery. From this on
our part surely Is one of candor and
decision.
( It is sad but true that not ono per
son in a hundred expressing them
selves on tho proposed homo rule
charter has over read the document,
or can dlBcuss It Intelligently, aa is
quickly dlscloBod when an attempt Is
mado to answer questions pro
pounded. What is more tho pity Is
that this Is true of most of the bodies
that, havo adopted resolutions on the
subject for the guidance ot other
people.
The Now York Sun stupidly refers
to The Commoner as "the personal
organ and proprietary enterprise ot
tho secretary of state." Shucks, it
Is just Brother Charley's annual al
lowance. Now let Senator Gore go after tho
blackmailers who concocted the
frame-up on him, and help make
that kind of business both odious
and unprofitable.
cmtrtm no an nus
FEBHUAHV 21.
Thirty Years Ago
"ino urasplng Miller," a play in four
acts, was given at tho Stadt theater to
the delight of a good audience. The prin
cipal characters were taken by Mr. Mi
chael and Mrs. Ilaurels.
The snow flakes that fell today were
simply enormous In size. They looked a
If tho gate had been left open and the
snow tossed out In shovelfuls.
Information comes that tho marriage of
Louis Bradford of this ctly and Miss
Ida A. PugH of Springfield. O., took placo
last Tuesday as announced, although no
cards wero issued.
Omaha Typographical union elected
Mr. James Dcrmody to represent them aa
their dclrgate to the International meet
ing at Now Orleans next June.
Manager C. M. Iord of tne U. P. Ath
letic association has secured nearly nil
of his players for the coming season.
All of tho nlno with tho team at tho
close of last season remain except Lark In,
who goes to Cincinnati, and four other
players will be added.
Tho many friends of Mrs. o. "VV, I.lntn
gcr regret to learn that she Is confined to
her house by Illness.
Miss Ella Grnlinm has opened rooms
at 1613 Dodgo street to teach art needle
work.
Delugo Hose company No. 4 gavo a well
attended masqucrado ball nt Turner .hall
last night.
Thomas Swobe, one of tho pleasant pro
prietors of thn Millard hotel, has gono
to Chicago on business.
H. 11. Oalcy, socond liouso south of
Davenport on the west sldo of Twenty
second street, wants a girl for general
housework.
K. L. Whitman, 1102 Davenport street, I
offers a reward for a watch charm con
sisting of a compass, square and globe.
Twenty Years Ago
ino iiocK island mado answer, protest,
lng against the suspension of tho bridge
contract ns proposed by the Union Pacific.
It further alleged grievances against the
Union Pacific, which It charged with
constantly hampering It ever since the
contract went Into effect.
"Kid" Baldwin, tho noted Ijttlo catcher,
was signed to ploy tho ISM scuson with
Manager Bill Rojurko's Omaha team. Time
was when thero was no bettor backstop
than tho Kid."
Railroads announced that tourists car
berths would he raised from J3 to
March 1. from all Missouri river points
to tho Pacific coast, the chief reason
being, evidently, that the companies
needed and could got the money this way.
They promised Improved service, how
ever. Julius Caosar was reserved for the
finale In tho Wardc-James repertory nt
the Boyd, and despito the well known dif
ficulty In casting the plot, tho burden
of which falls on four nrfnm
jlrutus, Caslus and Antony it was well
presontoa and to tho satlsractlon or the
audience. Fred Warde. thouch
fiom hoarseness, played Antony with
inarKca enccuvencss ana Louis James
was at his very best In Brultm.
Health Commissioner Savlllo
clean-up or Rescuo hall and that It cease
for a tlmo rescuing men, many or whom
lately had been diseased, turning the hall
Into a hospital, ' ,
Ten Years Ago--
H. J. donden, manager or the Krus
theater, received w"ord 0f another two
night stand by Weber & Fields.
Court Sergeant "Wholcn of the police
force was taken to St. Joseph, suffer
ing with stomach trouble. lie had been
ailing for Homo weeks.
Tho advance salo of tlckejs for Mrs.
Flsko In "Mary or Magdaia," at tho
Krug, was progressing rapidly.
Peter Hart, 67 ycara old, died at his
residence, MS North Twenty-third street.
Thomas M. Schumacher, trarfio man
ager or tho Oregon Short Lino and
formerly or Omaha, passed through tho
city en route east In his prlvato car to
consult Mr. Harrlman regarding tho af
fairs of tho road. Julius Kruttschnltt
had hastened cast the day before. Mr.
llarrlman's calling his men In at a time
when tho air was full of rumors about
tho Northwestorn buying tho Alton, was
regarded as very Significant.
M. jr. Krauss or Logansport, Ind., was
in tho city for tho purpose ot forming
in this stato an association of abstrac
tors to be allied under one general head
with a national organization. One pur
pose ot this organisation was to cen
ter the matter ot responsibility ot ab.
at rectors.
People and Events
Recurring to tbo subject of "big minds,"
the captain ot ono of the Atlantic liners
reports going head-on against a gale
speeding 110 knots an hour and spuming
seas that tossed his ship about llko a
Cockleshell.
Mr. Thornton ot Long Island, chosen as
general manacer of llrltlah nrnt
jern railway, la likely to find his new Job
cnveiopca wun rrosi. Already lie has
been denounced in Parliament as "an un
desirable alien."
The fact Is brought out by the observ
ance ot Lincoln day in Oregon that a sis-ter-ln-law
ot Mrs. Abraham Lincoln. Mrs.
Harah Todd, aged 103, Is living at liugene.
8ho ent a message to thoso who wore
colobratlng at Portland.
Recently, In Columbia, S. C, Benjamin
R. Tillman and John L.' McLaurin met.
shook hands and chatted Pleasantly about
nonpolltlcal mutters. It was n. rcconellla.
tion. Thirteen years ago. In tho senate at
Washington, Mr. Tillman punched Mr.
McLaurin'a head.
Ono by one man's lordly glories are
being plucked from him, ,Mrs. Charlotte
Perkins Oilman, expounding "The Larger
Feminism" In New York, announced that
Ad.m. not Kve, grew out ot a rib. ' At
me same time a Pennsylvania girl, com
ing out or a trance, renarted that m.1
langels wero wingless.
The Los Angeles Board or Publlo Works,
requested by tho city to make om minn.
repairs and save councilnien "from pres.
Dt ana future torment," promptly
agreed to provide for Present needs, hut
remarked rather warmly that provision
against future torment wa beyond human
rcacn. The board assumes to be well
acquainted with the councllmen.
Mme. Theodpre Amet, mother of twen-ty-two
children, all of whom aro living,
has bceu proposed to President P.ilno.ir
by Captain Malre of the League or Large
r amines, ior me cross or the Legion of
Honor. Captain Malre has been
by M. Polncalre'a secretary that tho mat
ter has been intrusted to the ministry or
the Interior for consideration.
Aimed at Omaha
Norfolk News: Victor Rosewater wants
to clap tho lid on the shady; lawyers In
Omaha. The lid was never In such de
mand in the metropolis as It Is now.
Grand Island Independent: Tho In
dependent cannot refrain from protesting
against the management of the .Omaha.
Automobile show. The state fair officers
wero denounced only last week for send
ing reading notices to the newspapers of
Nebraska and enclosing tickets. Indeed
the matter was one of "scandalous pro
portions." Yet these Automobllo show
directors, buzz wagon aristocrats, mag.
nates selling, for private gain, cars at
prices ranging from iU to $,CG, havo
tho temerity, with the resolutions re
ferred to stilt hot from the reel, to en
close two columns of reading matter-ami
two red tickets of admission? Respect
fully referred to the committee with the
suggestion that tho action of the Omaha
promoters has reached even moro "scan
dalous proportions."
Hastings Tribune: ir It were not for
Charles Wooster the papers of Omaha'
and Lincoln would be pretty dry some
times. Bridegport News-Blade: Omaha Is
stunned at the nerve of a man who stolo
three cars and sold them without the
consent of tho original owners. And yet
there aro men In the world of flnanco
today who actually stole whole railroads.
and got away with them, too.
Fremont Tribune: At Omaha
a bunch of Arabs attracted attention by
wearing aandals and going barelegged on
the streets. Women with their wishbones
exposed to tho elements gazed In amaze
ment and wonder at the eccentric
Bedouins, but we don't know that ihv
had anything on the Arabs.
Blair Democrat: To e ihn Jamtn
Stnto Journal booming Vf. J, Bryan for
uie presidency in 1916 is ns strange ns
it would be to sec tho World-Herald
boost "Vic" Rosewater for TnUert stt.
senator.
Ornnd Island Indenemlen
ago has called on Editor Howard of tho
v-ommous ueicgram to make good his
charges that the Omnhn. m,tn. i. o Mi
totan nnd that he has hold his own views
to ue superior to those of any organized
body of Christians. Huh! Whi'. it n
about?
Nebraska City Press: Thn Alhwt To
Seems tO liaV'e been B. fnrrn In innnir "V" -
brHska communities. Omaha. Lincoln
nnd Norfolk havo had clean-ups and
women have been ordered to leave the
town. Now comes Grand Island with an
caict to tho red-lightcrs to leave, and
forty-four women houeht tr.Tnnoii
to other towns. Tho Albert law has been
n larce ana has been enforced only after
SOmo SUCh Calamity as Omntin l,o.i
few weeks ago. Llko many other nn.
tlonal problems our well-meaning re
formers have tried to cure an evil by
starting at tho top of the tree Instead or
digging at the roots
Over Land and Sea
Trade unionism existed In Egypt In the
earliest centuries of Its history.
The co-operative agricultural ' associ
ations or Russia numbered 1,150 on Au
gust X. 1913.
Berlin, Gormany, under normal condi
tions, employs almost 1.000.000 workera in
Its Industries.
In Now South Wales, Australia, there
are 4,477 children under 10 years or ago
nt work In factories.
Mora than ono-third or Australia's resi
dents llvo In four cities Sydney, Adelaide.
Melbourne nnd Brisbane.
In Holland many milkmen deliver their
wares In bottles wrapped In red paper,
tho keeping quality ot the fluid being
greatly Increased thereby.
Austria-Hungary, which not long ago
waa ablo to supply almost its entire de
mand for grain, has In recent years im
ported considerable quantities.
Tho city council of Bergen passed a
yieaauro at Its lasijmeeting appropriating
rnrAA ..
u.uw crowns wrt;iiv) ior tno purpose or
erecting a public building to bo used as
a city murKct.
Among the household industries of the
Philippines that of hat making has In
recent years become a leading one. In
1W0, C21.IS75 hats were exported. 189,190 ot
mem coming to the United States.
In the last four years a number of
Important nations havo adopted the com
pulsory use of the metric system. Among
tneso are Denmark, China, Japan, the
flvo republics of Control America, Bui
garla, Chile, Uruguay and Slam.
The port of London authority announces
tnat contracts for certain works at the
port havo been placed with two German
firms. It la explained that tbo contracts
were obtained In competition with Brit
ish firms, and that they showed a saving
of S6 per cent on the lowest British ten
ders or ;kx,3U).
. The late Peter Coats ot the great Lon
don threadmaklng firm of J. & P. Coats,
left an estate of J12.000.OC). Tho death
duty to bo paid to the state will amount
to ti.iw.uu. Miie u,uw,wu estate or tne
late Anthony N. Brady of New York has
just paid an inheritance tax of fZ.SSi.oco,
Tabloids of Science
A new gem called hellodor has been
found In German South Africa.
A paper overshoe Is covered by a pat
ent recently granted to a New York
Inventor.
According to recent experiments In
Europe radium is Instrumental In pre
venting diseases ot plants.
Protecting gloves generally In use for
X-ray work ore ordinary gloves having
applied on the back a layer of rubber
that contains lead, as lead is known to
stop the rays.
Scientists observe that the gases which
water holds In solution have a marked
effect on the wear or iron and ateel
tubes, but ir the oxygen la eliminated
the Internal corrosion ot piping la les
sened. The stream which has been supplying
the ancient city or Damascus with water
tor nearly forty centuries has been har
nessed, and will provide electricity to
light the city and operate 100 miles ot
railway.
The average output of coal to each
person employed In the Industry in the
United State is a little more than 600
tons. In the United Kingdom iOS ton's, in
Germany I to tons, In War"- Ut ton, and
In Belgium W tons.
4&
I Third Degree.
OMAHA. Feb. 23 KJ.lltnr of Thi Reel A
modest man may be good for somothlng,
nut as a chief ot detectives he would
utterly fall. Pious and klndheartcd peo
ple believe that criminals should be
treated With arcai tenderness, hut h
police officer who undertakes to treat the
active and violent enemies of aoclety
with that respect due to an honest citi
zen, will find himself absolutely unfit for
his office. Mr. Maloney Is being thor
oughly scourged by the Lincoln news
papers, but whether ho applied or misap
plied tho third degree to a certain woman
Is, as yet, unsubstantiated. "Hut If h rild
apply the usual third degree methods and
failed to obtain the results exenected, it
was nothing more than an error of Judg
ment, nnd If ho had produced the result
expected, nothing would have been said.
Jt is absolutely Impossible for pure Jus
tlce to prevail in the police courts and
city prisons: a Jury cannot h nrnvM1
for every vagrant and prostitute charged
wiui a petty offence, and It Is certain
that occasionaly nn Innocent person will
suffer. Now I believe that detectives by
being long associated with, and familiar
with tho methods of criminals, know
pretty, well what thev
they confer tho third degree on a candl
doatc, and yet they make some mistakes.
ano third degree Is not an evil If it
provents a greater evil than itself, nmi
I am constrained to belltwii that detec
tives do not confer the socond section of
this degree upon anyone unln th imv
Kood reasons to bcllovo they have tho right
party, out as I said before, their Judg
ments nre not Infallible. I purchased a
Job orf a police force In a large western
city several years ago, and I made so
many mistakes that I was soon dismissed.
Bcnt a orunken cx-senator to tho sta
tion when I should haVn flnt him VnwA
in a hack; i arrested a boy for hopping
iimna. anu me mother clubbed me with
a mop-stick! she was a wealthy woman.
One day I brought in a nice looking girl
and charged her with " shoplifting," but
the captain said. "Let her go, she is
afflicted with kleptomania, and her nar.
enU aro fine people." The pollco system
is slightly corrupt, but the people are
mil. reaay icr a better one, and when
they aro ready, thoy will have It.
E. O. M'INTOSII.
Twice Told Tales
Att Unexnecieil neium,'.
Congressman Edward L. Hamilton ot
Michigan told this onn nt ,n
ner, when rercrenco was mado to the bad
orraKs mat arc occasionally made by the
Uttlo kids.
Some time ago a friend or tho tamlly
"iiuuiuu ior uinncr at a certain happy
Uttlo home. Tho friend hart nn nnn,lll.
' ..
that would havo made n boarding house
niiBiio 10 raise tno rates, and aa he
stowed away tho fodder in rrft.it nmn
title?, he was interestedly watched by
tuiui, tne little 6-year-old daughter.
"Say, Mr. Smltk she finally remarks
"I do wish you were here at dinner every
iay."
"That is certainly very sweet of you
utue one.- ncamcd me truest. "I nm
afraid that you would get very tired of
me."
"Oh, no, I wouldn't," was the young
ster'a startling rejoinder. "Jr you were
hero oveTy day we wouldn't havo any
scraps to eat tomorrow." Philadelphia
uciegrapn.
I.ooklunr Forward.
A Chicago physician was congratulating
Orvlllo Wright on his new aeroplane
stabilizer.
"I'm taking a lot ot work from you
doctors, I am afraid," said Mr. Wright,
with a mischievous smile. "I feel sorry
for tho young Dayton medical student I
heard about the other day.
"Two medical students were discussing
their prospects In the profession when ono
of them said:
" To succqed In medicine It is neces
sary to specialise.'
" 'Decidedly,' agreed the otlier. 'What
specialty aro you going to choose?'
" 'I'm going to specialize In aeroplane
accldents-there'll be a great future
there. "Chicago News.
Show Ins Ml" Love.
"Lookn here, Sam"
"Yes. Llza."
"I begins t think yer doesn't love me
110 more."
"Nonsense, 'Liza; what put dat In yer
head!"
"Why, yer Just sit there by the fire
and sees me work. .
"Why. 'Liza! The more I sits by this
'ere fire and sees you workln the more
I loves yer, honey!" Yonkers Statesman,
Editorial Sittings
st T miU r?lnh.TVmncnit: If a. ban
queter accustomed to garpe Juice should
accidentally drink some champagne the
consequences might be serious and far-
leacblng.
Washington Post: At the same time It
would be some amends it Alfonso would
bestow the Order ot the Golden Fleece
on a tew ot the Americans who have
had dealings with the rich Spanish pris
oner.
Philadelphia Ledger: Bertlllon Is dead,
tho man whose system of Identification
by thumb prints revolutionised the police
methods ot the world. He he.d a wonder
ful record for success In protecting so
ciety against criminals.
Boston Transcript. We will go farther
and hazard a guess that In probably a
dozen Insane asylums In this country
there are being constructed alrshlpa that
could cross the Atlantic nnd make the
return trip In twenty minutes.
Sioux City Journal: Those Nebraskans,
their name being1 legion, who as Individ
uals agree each for himself as to his
own titnees to hold federal office under
this administration, will not welcome the
positive denials ot Secretary Bryan and
Senator Hitchcock that they have not
agreed aa to appointments. And one-
fourth ot the term ot this administration
haa already passed .
Pittsburgh Dispatch: It Is heard from
Panama that while Colonel Qoethals as
the head of the zone government bus-
vended Mr. John Burke, it was Mr. Met
calfe, formerly associate editor of the
Commoner and now a canal commis
sioner, who discovered Burke's crooked-
ntsa. Mr. Metcalfe's success as a graft
discoverer may create demand foe him
nearer home. 1
MIRTHFUL REMARKS.
"What's, tho reason of all this f!ht
on the railroads?"
..."K dunno." replied Farmer Corntosel;
but 1 can't help thlnktn' tome of the
reason Is that the railroads ain't glvln'
put near as many passes as they usetl
to. Washington Ptar.
.'l?for.B0.Wa.h,nBton tolrt his father the
trte" Ut chopllnP tne cherry
!!,c,Crp",'d the sweet. Impressionable
Vyu' .Peorgo,knevr wh" he was caught
with the goods, all rlghf-Washlngton
otar.
A vnnuti vfutHn.. ' At....t.i.
inrTii KiC0ld "'"'"it her husband talk-
tviCl'T doS,or salJ' "y" mlBht
day time.' National Monthly.
J?fa.!l,my,"Jftl1 her mlsress after din
ner. how do you nltch your pies so
evenly around tho edge?"
...Mnyr.r?"01 her eyes proudly. "Ah
uses mah false tcet. minsus, dat wn't met.
cm so regular'-Natlonal Magazlue.
"I wish I had taken my mother's ad
uce when alio begged mo not to marry
you.
"Did your mother try to keep you from
marrying me?"
"Yes."
"Oh, how I have wronged that woman!"
Chicago Record-Herald.
Miss Kit-See MIrh Upper over thereto
She thinks she's beautiful, evidently. But.
my dear, that sereno pulse of hcrs Is
merely pose.
.miss ICat I know It. Strange that the
ell
iminaiion or an "l ' should leave a trait
Crawford Whal'a thi matter with thnt
fellow who Is holding onto the lamp
post and shuffling his feet?
Crabshaw There was a time when I'd
havo said he waa drunk, but now, per
haps, he's practicing a new dance.
"Mv Wlfn lmx 1farnt anmtMnir f
her lesson In parliamentary rules."
--linn snoj
"I should sayl At a debnto the other
A Few Weeks Hence
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frill bo discontinued and the present prices withdrawn. 9S9 to
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iNOW is the best time to subscribe.
If You Are Going Abroad
or expect to travel anywhere or wish merely)
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Let the new 1
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a handy volume of the Britannica in your suit-case will give you,
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Everything About This Busy
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For planning or accomplishing anything else setting there
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day about onr buying t now and hand
some dinner centerpleee, she voted to lay
the subject Of tho debate on the table."
Baltimore American.
"The doctor advises mo to taks lo
"Well, wlfey. that prescription won
. t Mt I
cost mucn 10 m. ,ii,7T
"So. ot course i 11 net" -walking
costumc."-LoulsvIlle CoUriir-
Journal. J
PARODY ON PSALM OF LIFE.
Phoebe Carey.
Tell me not In Idle Jingle
Marriage Is on empty dream.
For the girl Is dead that's single.
And girls are not what they seem.
Life Is real! Life Is, earnest!
Slnglo blessedness a fib!
Man thou art. to man returnestl
Has been spoken of a rib!
Not enjoyment and not sorrow,
1
1
Is our aesunea ena or
But to act that each tomorrow
Finds us nearer marriage day.
Life Is long, and youth Is fleeting.
And our hearts, though light and gay,
Still like pleasant drums are beating
Wedding marches all the way.
In the world's broad field of battle,
In tho bivouac of life.
Be not like dumb-driven cattle!
Be a heroine r wife!
Trust no future, howo'er pleasant,
Let the dead past bury Its dead!
Act. act In the living present!
Heart within and hope ahead!
Lix-es of married folks remind us
We can live our lives aa well.
And, departing, leave behind us
Such examples as shall "tell."
Such examples as another,
tl In Idle sport.
A forlorn, unmarried brother.
Seeing, shall take heart and court.
Lt us then be up and doing.
With a heart on triumph set,
Still contrling. stilt pursuing,
And each ono & husband get
1.1
I
un tne trip, Keep yourself
posted. A volume of the Encyclo
paedia Britannica can be carried
in a crip, and a whole set in a
small trunk. A single volume is
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read on cars or. ship. Get authori-
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After the trip, clarify your,
impressions, take stock, by going
over tbc same ground in the Ency-;
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If You Cannot Travel,
But Want To,
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value ol going abroad by a
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you get in the Britannica descrip
tions and criticisms of the daces
you would like to see or have heard;
about, from guides far more expert
man you could get in Home or
Florence by the day.
If You Have to Travel,
and Don't Enjoy It,
Britannica is
and for f
will v
I'
i
I i
V
