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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 20, 1914)
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IHJfJ .BWE: 05LUI., Fill DAY, FEBRUARY 20. 1914.
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l Ct NDEP1IY KDWAKD KOSEWAf Rl'C
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Entered at Omaha posiofliee as tccohd
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Address all comnlnlnta ot irregularities
In deliveries to rity Circulation Dept.
Only .'-cent atnmps received in payment
of smal! necount. Personal chosks. ex
cept on Omaha and eastern exchanges.
Omaha -Tho Bee BulldlnC
Soull Omaha 231S N street.
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Mncoln-Ii I.lttle Building.
Chicago Ml Hearst Building.
New York-Boom UM. 18 Fifth Avenue,
st Louis 02 New Bank of Commerce.
Washington-i& Fourteenth flt..V. 'V.
rORItESPO."! DKNcST "
Communications relating to news and
editorial matter should be addressed
Ommr Bee, Ulltorial Department.
State ot Nebraska, County of Douglas, ss.:
Dwlght William, circulation manager
ot Toe Bee Publishing companf. being
duly sworn, says that tho average dally
circulation for thu month of January.
ltli. mi U,M1
Subscribed In my presenee and aworn to
before mo this 3d day ot February, l&ll.
(Seal) Notary public.
Subscribers leaving; the city tem
porarily should hnve Tin; Bee
mailed to then. Address will be
rknnaeA as often n ritirlctl.
Tho, crooks aro not grieving over
the death of Alphonse Ucrtilloh. .
"SUlclde in a Subway," at least
Slves, ftillteratlvo smoothness to tho
The case of Sehatpr Goro scotrig to
show how far certain domocrats will
go for political pie-.,,
Kvon though no one can run tho
old world all by himself, it is a grand
thing that it la run so well.
Perish tho thought that 'tho six
new vico admirals will bo known as
tho vico commlsslonod officers ot tho
If tho two secretaries wish to clnc'a
this western prosperity that Im
pressed them no; they will locate a
regional, bank in Omaha.'-
The Boston Transcript suggests
that we stop watching and Just con
tinue to wait on Huerta. Yes, that
jmlght save ua a little weariness.
Hpoaklng of legal ethics, tho Ooro
case reminds us once more that with
out tho aid of unscrupulous lawyers
such games could not bo played.
Jx-JJanker Morso has sailod away
on another European pleasure trip,
That Atlanta ozono Is positively un
beatable in Its medicinal properties.
The Omaha street railway company
should feel very kindly toward tho
weather man this winter, 'for it'has
not had to get but Its snow plows
To learn to oay no at tho right time
nnd then stand by it la the first clement
if success. David Starr Jordan.
The author of tho old song. "Dare
to Be & Daniel," beat him to it.
Wky does anyone condemn tho
CoagreioHal Record as useless,
when it Is o useful in keeping con
gressmen and senators busy at revis
ing their Unspoken remarks?
Frmltleat Wilson la not taking
unuecesMry chances with his health.
For him to keep In good physical
condition concerns ninety millions of
people who applaud his prudence.
Your averago man has no difficult!
to discover purity of motive It he ap
proves the action, but may bo utterly
impervious to all claims of a pure
motive for anythlug done counter to
The Philadelphia Press apeakB of
Kansas as the stato mado famous "by
a Mr. White." How can tho crpdlv
belong to one man, "with all that tho
Carrie Nations and the Mary Ellen
Leases have done?
It might be of interest to note that
the colonel's daughter has at least
become a godmother, tho youngster
being a member ot the Medlll McCor
mlck household, ono of tho most una
frald families of the land.
Tho soul of bourbon democracy in
Mlsourt Is Vexed. Just when It was
thought Folk was safely shelved In
the State department, It appears be Is
being groomed for tho toga of Sena
tor Stoue. Looks like a gumshoe
W mention It merely to keep the rec
ord straight. The Charles W. Morae
funeral Is far behind the nchedule time
as arranged when he left the Attant
pr(on. Houston Post. -
Then the mention is not to be re
garded as a reflection on Mr. Haw
thorne's aspersions upon the prison.
General Coxey Is planning a second
march upon Washington to demand
that congress provide work for., tho
Hrmy of unemployed. The general
evidently is whistling through hit
hat. Wo have Jt atralght from ad
ministration sources that there is no
Senator Gore's Vindication.
AVe find the evidence submitted by the
plaintiff entirety Insufficient upon -which
to Laso a suit; that said evidence wholly
oxonoratea the defendant, and had the
defendant at tlio roncluilon of the plain
tiffs evidence announced that lie desired
to Introduce no evidence nnd rest hi
case our verdict would have been tho
enme In thnt event as now returned by
us, In favor of the defendant.
Ten minutes after leaving tho
court room tho Jury returned with
this vindication of Senator Gore, tho
blind senator from Oklahoma, ft is
unuounioaiy mo voraict 01 the vast
of.thoso w1-10 foUowcd t,lc
wiso irom mo nowspapor reports. To
any fair mind it must have boon ap
parent from tho first that it was a
frame-up by disgruntled political
office-seekers, and the strangest
foaturo of it Is that it should have
been dignified with court procedure,
championed beforo a Jury by mem
bers of the legal profession.
And now what of those who ruth
lessly conspired againBt Senator
Gore? Thero will always be thnt
prurient few to cherish a lurking sus
picion of Senator Qoro's guilt. Our
noblo machinery of Justice ought to
find n way of complete vindication, if
it bo possible, by dealing with tho
pqrpotratorB of tho outrage lawyers
The Publicity Pamphlet.
The Boe Is in receipt of a copy .of
tho official state publicity pamphlet,
Just published by South Dakota, em
bodying the principles and arguments
of pnrty candidates for tho primary
election to bo held thoro on tho
forthcoming fourth Tuesday In
Mnrch. Wo advert to this merely us
a forerunner of what wo have to loolc
forward to in Nebraska. Tho South
Dakota document is made up of sixty
four pages of standard siro, embel
lished with platforms, portraits and
biographies couched In tho most mod
est langilage' which could bo used by
n candidate fearful that some ot his
strong points might be overlooked.
South Dakota seemingly has a real
contest on for only tho republican
nominations,' places on the other
pnrty tickets going either uncon
tested or ns ppr slate, Nebraska,
with two or. three additional political
Parties, und prospective competition
in. nil of thorn,. ought to have a pub
licity pamphlet of several times aa
many pages In fact, ought to outtop
them all with a good, fat volume as
big, if not as interesting, as tho old
tlmo agricultural reports.'
Ak-Sftr-Ben Stands for Nebraska.
Tho managers ot Ak-tfar-Bcn have
planned u, home-comhuc of all former
residents of Omaha' aa a feature ot the
current year's .activities. Probably they
will next bo making honorary members
ot all formtr fftjbrnaknns now living In
othccatateH nd 'countries. Lincoln Star,
If.th'ls ieansthat Omaha, through
Ak-Sar-Ben.jBhould take in ail of Ne
braska, it Is a. good Idea which we
would bo glad to push along. As a
matter of fact, Ak-8ar-Bon Is by no
means a local Omaha institution, but,
rh Its spollod-backwards namo indi
cates, stands for Nebraska as a
whole. Its naceants and entortaln-
tiuonts, though furnished V tlio
Omaha membership, aro for the de
lectation, instruction and benefit ot
nil present, former and prospective
residents, and for all the strangers
within our gates ns woll. '
Alaskan Railway Building,
The present congress is doing what
the last congress should have done lit
responso to President Tatt's Insistent
recommendations for legislation
opening up development in Alaska,
Tbo house's pasBago of, tho adminis
tration railroad bill assures ot the
power to proceod In due time, with
tho constructlonvot 1,000 miles of
railway from tho coast to tho Interior
at a cost ot 3S,000,000.
Between this' and the building ot
tho Union Pacific we find no exact
analog, for in tho case of the latter
the government's participation was
limited to a loan and land subsidy.
and yet In tho consequent develop
ment wo may find a very near ap
proach to analogous conditions, Pene
trating the fertile fields and prolific
forest and mining regions of tho
great peninsular will work corre
sponding results In growth and devol
opinenu . Even under tho past handl
caps Alaska has given forth prodigi
ous wealth, yioldtng many Individual
fortunes In excess ot the ampunt wo
paid for It. Undoubtedly tho open
ing up of tbo interior with transpor
tation facilities will bo the signal for
tho greatest Influx It has over yet
known, and tho vast majprlty will
go ns permanent Bottlers.
It is suggested that tho stockhold
ors of tho Auditorium donate their
block to tho city, but there Is no law
to compel them to give their property
away, nor would It bo fair to one un
less all did tho same. That, how
ever, la not tho question. Omaha tt
not begging tor charity, but only
called on to decide whether the Au
ditorium purchase at the price stipu
latod is, or is not. a good business
South Omaha city officials still In
sist that their contract with the old
water company is binding on tho
Water board, which is attempting to
repudiate the obligation. It alt de
pends on whose ox Is gored. If the
contract were regarded as nioro
favorable to the water district the
AVatcr hoard ould upholding It,
and demanding that South Omaha
observe the provisions to the letter,
, jhxsjjay in Omaha
ccmrrua rxoM biz run
U J fvO
Thirty Years A go
Clara Morrla playing- "Article 47" proved
a long looked. for treat for Omaha
theater-goers for the opening perform
ance of her engagement nt Boyd's. Every
seat downstairs was occupied, but the
gallery waa only partially patronized, the
prize fight being evidently of more in
terest to the gallery gods.
The prlzo fight, otherwise known as
the soft glove contest between Prof. Mil
ler of . Omaha and O. II. Smith of Chi
cago, held the board at the Academy of
Muslo for twenty-eight rounds, lasting
two hours, only to be finally given to
Stiller on a foul. According to Tho Bee's
report "the performance was simply a
ruse to relieve the spectator of l with
out giving him any return for his money."
Arrangements have been completed for
the Kmmct anniversary by the local
Kmmet Monument association, with ad
dresses by Alexander Bultlvan ut Chi
cago nnd Colonel Michael BoUnd of Ken
tucky. Resolutions of respect bv - the ller
meslan society for tho lato Judge Chad
wlck ore printed over the names of O.
M. Hitchcock, dcorge W. Tillson and
W. F. CJurley. committee.
Mrs. Ksthcr Sturgos, aged 77 yeara,
died at the resldenco of her on, H. A.
Sturgc, 111 Bouth Eighteenth, street.
The remains ure to bo aent to Vassar,
Mich., for Interment. '
rr.rAntv Vjknra Aff
Hlxty-ono union lanom m mi v...h
of Frank J. Ramgo and J. H. MoDonald
wont on strike as a reeult of their re
fusal to abide by a reduction In wage?
to conform to tho scale ot 18S9.
A lively meeting waa held In the ov
nlng at the Commercial club, where the
subject ot better roada tor tho county
was discussed. Curtlss C. Turner atarted
the ball of oratory to rolling, going Into
all phases. Including cosU. of road, Im
provement Aa a net result ot large o
umes of talk a committee was appointor
consisting of the following to look after
tho preliminaries toward securing tho
necessary road Improvements: W. A.
I Gibbon, Ouy C. Barton, W. S. Popple
ton. 'C. C. Turner and Oeorge B, Lake.
Although tho locat pot qf democracy
was boiling to the overflow point, several
ot tho bourbons Insisted on hurling raw
material Into the porridge, the latest bit
of which waa the personage of the ilon
William Jennings Bryan, congressman
from tho First district. But not so much
aa tho lower part ot Mr. Bryan's elo
quent mouth Could bo forced Into tha
treacle, and there he sat perched on the
edge of the steaming kettle. The fu
rore aroso over Bryan'a refusal to come
to Omaha and deliver an address on tho
incomo tax In response to an Invitation
sent to Washington by the following
honorable democrats, to-wlti W. .D. Mc
Hugh, J. B. Shcean, C. J. Smyth. .Bi P.
Smith and 8. It. Rush.
Building Inspector Tilly got home from
Boston, where ho attended a national
gathering ot building liupcctors-at tho
Ten Years Ago
Tho first annual circus of the boys'
department, of -the Young Mun'a Christian,
association was a humdinger. One of the
big hits In the managerle was the mam
moth elephant. Jumbo, of which Prontlsa
Jjord, formed the very efficient frpnt legs,
while Stanton Salisbury brought up the
rear. Clara Walker was a handsome
gorilla and Charles Jennings the real
clown, assisted by so many other clowns
It was difficult to count them. D. Burr
Jones, secretary of tho boya' department,
wna ringmaster. .
Rev. Dr, De Ijone. .pastor of Knox
Presbyterian church, gave nhe soventh
and eighth grade pupils of Lake school
a treat In a lecture on Washington and
Dr. R. D. Harris,, registrar ot the
United States land office at Kidney, was
In tho city with the announcement that
he would run for lieutenant governor on
the republican ticket' It honored with the
nomination. He therefore hurled his hat
Into the ring as an opponent of Lieuten
ant Governor McGllton, against whom,
personally, he has no grudge, however.
Hale of seats for Mra. Flske at the Krus
March S was running high, also tho
Rev. M. J. O'Connor, vico president ot
Crolghton university, presided at a meet'
tng ot students and faculty held to ex
press appreciation ot tha additional
1150,000 which Count Cretghton made to
People and Events
M. ManUnohoff. the richest man In the
world, has been the object ot much curl-
cilty during his stay In London. His
passion la .horses, and ho himself esti
mates his stables to be worth altogether
Low Btone of Wlnstcd, Vt, reports
that the earthquake shock of Tuesday
threw him from) his chair and wedged
Mm so tightly under tho hot kitchen
stove that neighbor had to bo called In
to helP get him out
Anthony Curtln, who celebrated his
t-eventieth birthday recently In Waltham,
began work at the age of 7, has been
1'orty-slx years a toundryman. and has
been In his present location for the last
thirty ycara. Ho goes on duty every
morning at 6:tJ and never misses a work
One ot Henry Ford's boys took his
test girl to a Justice shop in Detroit
and when the knot waa tied handed the
Justice a tenner, with the remark, "Keep
the change; I work for Ford." Charley
Gates never gavo a better exhibition ot
throwing the dough at the birds. Reg'
ular price for knots, ft
Mra. H. C Newton, spokesman for
the woman's party In Cook county, Illi
nois, gives a modern version ot Jere
miah's lamentation over the eagerness of
sister to represent Bathhouse John's
ward in Chicago's city council, "Why,"
says Mra. Newton, "you can't tell, Marlon
Drake ((liter candidate) from the Bath
house. One la as full ot beer as, tho
other." Isn't that awful!
Western bankers who showed their
skill In vocalised tango before the re
gional bank imtulsltora will bo Interested
In the news that Secretary McAdoo Is
some tangoer himself. Down at Atlanta,
reports have It that at a social hoe
down, the secretary outtangoed local
u,nt tthd cut "m darlns dl h
J Tall. TlrSt'sTept ST
lirompting one of his partners to suggest
the use of a skirt supporter.
In Defense at n Friend.
OMAHA, Feb. 19.-To tho Kdltor'of Tho
Bee: As a friend and admirer ot John
I Webster I want to protest against
tho cartoon about him which you have
Printed. Your artist haa caught his
facial features fairly well, but falls ut
terly to do Justice to him sartorlally.
Just becauso ho has been drawing 15,000
of tho clty'a money for serving as Water
board attorney, nnd at tho same time
drawing another tat salary for fight
ing the city aa tho street car company's
attorney does not Justify your artist in
changing tho style ot his necktlo and
altering the pattern of his coat or clad
ding his lower limbs like thoso ot a
ballet dancer to say nothing ot Insert
ing a diamond stud Into the center of his
shirt bosom. No question of legal ethics
In this case can obacuro tho paramont
Issue ot correct dress on which your
artist has done Mr. Webster a grievous
wrong. FKLLOW LAWYER.
Wsrni One- from AVooilcr,
SILVER CHEEK, Neb., Feb. 19.-TO the
Editor of The Bee: While I waa from
homo on my late trip cast, you pub
lished on January 17 a column dispatch
from Washington giving some account
of my visit to Congressman Dan V.
Stephen In the matter of the appoint
ment of a postmaster at Silver Creek,
and giving, nlso, Mr. Stephen's defense
of his recommendation ' ot W. S. Gray
for that place, and ot his rejection ot a
petition of ninety-eight democrats out ot
an average of 110 In favor of Arthur 1C.
Whllo the postmastershlp at Sliver
Creak la no longer nn Issue, Dan V.
Stephens la in Issuo and will be until the
next August primary election, after
which, I am Inclined to think, he will be
llko the Silver Creek postmastershlp. 1
therofore ask you to permit md a reply.
Mr. Stephens eays:
I reccommcndcd W. H. Gray to the
postmaster general last spring after a
democratic caucus had been held In Sli
ver Creek, at which Mr. Gray waa
But no democratic caucus. was held In
Sliver Creek and therefore Mr. Gray wui
not io elected, An alleged caucus was
called by Mr. Gray himself without any
authority whatever from Mr. 8tephcns or
anyone else, and held on March 19. 1913.
Again Mr. Stephens says:
HIb opponent In that caucus, E. H.
loung protested against his (Orav'u)
appointment on the ground that
he had not been consulted In the calling
of tho caucus, and I held up the recom
mendation of Mr. Gray for a considerable
period at Mr. Young's request, awalUng a
formal protest, which he did not flic.
But Mr. Young was not Gray's oppon
ent In that caucus; ho never went near It
and told liln friends not tp go. And for
tho reason that Gray utterly refused to
havo any understanding with him what
ever as to the conditions of an election,
as Stephens rules, and Dr. Boyd'a in
structions under those rules peremptor
ily required him to do. (Dr. Boyd la chair
man of the democratic county commit
tee) As to whether or not Mr. Young tiled
any protost, consider the following:
1913, Mr Stephens In a letter to Mrs. E.
H. Young saya:
I haVO VOUr1 kind' tavnr if ,1.1.
In regard to tho postmastershlp at Silver
, tuiKou w in your hus
band over the nhotm mi n.i... t
would riot take '-any action on the recom
mendation of Mr. Gray as a result of
the CaUCUfl. Until I hnnnl r, i.i... i
do not know- what action I ahall take In
f.eWl i but 1 certainly will wait
SSH'-J S?r from AIr' Yung stating his
And then again under a wihin.im,
duto of April 25. 1913. in iv iHr
Tn it . .v
41. ioung, air. Stephens says:
l.i1Cfiur,nrt favor of the th Instant
with reference to thn rwr
r l?w.n fof the. expression of choice
fOr DOStmBHtur In nl hrt.l ..i i
SSmiUvi."5 yo.lL.d,d not cal1 on n. and
?i"Ahe.1rd n.ot.hln'r' n,ore ron you as to
?4? that you d1dU?t.in.
warded eamo to the postmaster cenSi
wun my recommendation.
Aiid so we here have the InterMiin
spectacle of a congressman saying he cer-r
iaimy woum not do a certain thing and
thon facing squarely about nnd clnlno- ,n
As the old postmaster had more than
cigll. montna to Serve. Mr. Tnilnir .11.1
not consider the caso urgent, and as he
was obliged to leave town to work
he had hU wlfa write until he could ret
time. But llko many others In thl Thir.i
congressional district, Mr. Young found
that tho plighted word of a congressman
(If hla name happens to be Dan V.
Stephens) Is a "broken reed."
Further pursuing the subject Mr.
Stephens says. "That since tho chairman
of the democratic, centrnl committee, Dr.
Karl E. Boyd, had approved tho action
of the caucus, he had no other course
open man to recommend Air. Gray as
postmaster." which he did. Perhaps not.
but . an 'honest man would easily havo
found some other course. If you do not
like that word "honest." just used, read
what Immediately follows:
When In Mr, Stephens' office In Wash
tngton on tho .afternoon ot January 14 I
had been explaining to htm how Gray
had not compiled with his rules In any
particular Mr. Stephens declared with
You have not told me anything new
knew all that before: I knew my rules
had not been compiled with when I
Tho very next afternoon In his office.
after he had turned down the petition of
the ninety-eight Silver Creek democrats,
I said to him. "I think you did very
wrong to recommend Gray when you
knew your rules had not been compiled
with." And then, with aa great empha
sis sa on the day before, ho saldr
thought my order had been compiled
with." On which day did Mr. Stephens
tell tho truth? It In this matter Mr,
'Stephens cares to raise a question of
veracity between himself and me, I am
qulto content to let the case so at once
to the Jury, namely, to the voters ot the
Third congreatilonal district.
Speaking ot a paper I showed, him In
which nearly all tho business men of
Silver Creek said they were In favor of
Arthur K. Roth for postmaster, Mr.
Stephen said It waa of no value what
ever and that If asked they would turn
right around and sign a like paper for
Gray. And again, speaking ot tho petl
tlon of the nlnety-elRht, he said that waa
of no value, notwithstanding mora than
seventy of the signers had signed their
names at leait three times by way ot
protest against Gray. Wonder it Con
gressman Stephens will think the crosses
that theeo Silver Creek democrats will
make next August against the name ot
his opponent lll be ot any value?
When In court it can be shown that In
testifying a wttnesa has lied In any par
ticular, his testimony Is wholly dis
credited. "falsa in one, false In all." as
the old saying l Do not think I am
now going to call Mr Stephens a liar.
for I am not That would be very un
parliamentary, and I should have to
apologue and have my remarks "ex
punged from the record." But I do not
think It necessary to pursue Mr. Stephens
further In his devious ways.
I omitted to state in Its proper con
nection that when Dr. Boyd found out
thnt ho had been deceived In the report
mod to him of Gray's alleged caucus, In
a letter to Mr. Stephens ho withdrew his
approval of that caucus and endorsed the
petition of Mr. Roth. Having unwittingly
perpetrated a wrong, Dr. Boyd, like the
honorable man ho Is, did what he could
to right that wrong. But not bo with
Congressman Dan V. Stephens. He per
petrates wrongs both unwittingly and
wittingly and then "stands pat'Vthrough
fear ot making himself look like a
blooming Idiot In trying to get out
I.otp and Patriotism.
OMAHA, Feb. . To the Editor ot
Tho Bee: Tolstoy was very much op
posed to patriotism, which he defined as a
species ot Insanity and tho cause of more
bloodshed and misery than all other emo
tions of the human mind; but Tolstoy
was an extremist. For my part, when I
hear the "Star Spangled Banner" I feel
llko ahoutlng at tho top of my voice;
but the pleasure Is soon exhausted, for
my attention must be distributed among
so many pleasant emotions, and attracted
by so many forms of misery which I am
unablo to suppress, that my patriotic
feelings aro sunk more than half the
time In sluggishness ami Indifference.
When I hear anyone sing "Home, Sweet
Home," I am ready to burst Into tears,
and I feel more pain than pleasure when
I think how wilfully disobedient I waa
at home, and how little I regarded the
tenderness of my mother and the sober
counsels of my father, and I am always
glad when the song Is ended, for I cannot
think of the pleasures ot youth without
reflecting upon tho unhapplness and sor
row of thoso who brought mo up, and
with what indltferenco I received the
bounty of my parents and tho Instruc
tions of my teachers. I have been in
love a few times, nnd married once, and
the great mountains of Joy, turned out
upon closo Inspection, to be little mole
hills; Lady Jane Orey was queen of Eng
land for nine days, but the scaffold stood
behind the throne.
I novor had sufficient strength to sup
port tho feelings of patriotism or lovo
and keep their heat at tho melting point,
and when I have been half sick, dead
broke, and looking for a Job, It was n
matter ot complete Indifference to me,
whether tho band played "The Star Span
gled Banner" or "Tako Your Old Clothes
and Go;" but now that I have money on
Interest, I feel proud of my country, pro
viding tho weather suits me. Falling In
lovo with a woman Is a pleasing mental
occupation, and I often think of taking
another plunge; but when X retloct that a
woman cannot be made happy and cheer
ful unless she thinks she Is understood,
and that as I grow older I become more
stupid, and less anxious to understand
her, I conclude that falling In love at 40
Is a Perilous undertaking. I lovo this, my
native country, yet if I were banished to
Italy or Zululand with plenty ot money,
I should not suffer the least uneasiness,
for I would probably feet as patriotic there
as I do here, and If poor, would "more
than likely be subject to the same Insults,
and humiliation. I believe in love and
patriotism, but whether 1 yell for my
country or not. depends upon what luck,
I am having, for I love my own Interest
better than anything else.
E. O. M'lNTOSH.
Twice Told Tales
He Wasn't Impressed.
An Indianapolis lawyer with a friend
motorod down to Greenfield, . Iml., the
birthplace ot James Whltcomb Riley, the
Hoosler poet. They had dinner at the
hotel ahd thought they would like to see
tho house where Riley lived. So they
asked the hotel man:
"Whero Is Riley's house?"
"I don't know any hotel by that name,"
he replied, "though there may be some
such boarding house hero."
"I mean the James Whltcomb Riley
house," said the lawyer, thinking his
host had misunderstood.
I don't know him; you may bo able
to find 'his name In the city directory."
"I guess he's moved," said the lawyer.
"Probably," the hotelkeepcr com
mented. "Some of 'them Irish don't stay
long In a place." New York Sun.
There was a sudden change in the wind
and the pastor ot tho Mount Zton chapel
saw that some ot his parishioners drew
their - wraps about their shoulders. He
paused In his sermon.
VBrudder Wilding." he said, raising his
voice and waking the- old sexton from
peaceful slumbers In the rear pew,
"Brudder Wilding, be klrvj enough to
close all de winders on de eas' side ob
de church. De wind has come round, an
we can't afford to Jose a single lamb
irom ols tola by carelessness, wid an
outstanding debt on dls chapel, an' two
families moved out ob town." Pittsburgh
He AVaa Not a Subject.
I had often heard a man describe him
self as an "American cltlien," writes G,
M., but the phrase never struck me so
forcibly as It did last week. It was on the
boat tor Dieppe. The steward came
tound to warn passengers to get ready
for landing. He also took occasion to
ascertain our nationality, asking, "What
subject aro you? British subject? French
subject?and so on. At last he carps to
an American passenger, with the ques
tion: "And yours whose subject are you?"
"I ain't a subject," waa his indignant
reply. "I ain't anybody's subject. I am
an American citizen."
And he looked It. Manchester Ouardian.
A miner got killed and a tactful asso
ciate was delegated to break tho news to
So the tactful fellow called at her house
"Wtth your golden hair, blue eyes and
plnk-and-whlte complexion, ma'am you'd
break every heart In town If you wore
The young woman laughed and blushed
"Oh, go on," she said.
"And you are a widow, too," said the
tactful miner quickly, selling his chance.
"Bill's legs-and arms was just blown oft
In an explosion. But, by jlmmlny, ma'am
ain't you goln' to look good In black,
though r' Philadelphia Record.
(Senator Borah's desire that the men
who looted tho New Haven railroad be
prosecuted criminally shows a surprltlng
disregard for the tradition of at oik operations.
GRINS AND GROANS.
"What's this I hear. Tlffan? Is It true
that you'vo married your typewriter
"Yes. She waa no rood as a tvne-
wrlter and it seemed the easiest way to
get rid of her." Cloveland Plain Dealer.
'Why do you Insist on worrying
aooui your incomo tax?"
"For two reasons," replied Mr. Cas
slus Chex: "first because I havo to pay
any at all and second becauso my In
come doesn't require me to pay more."
"How much nre these apartments a
moniiiT- asKea tho caller.
"Fifty dollars," replied the agent.
"And do you take children?"
"In payment? Certainly not" Yonk
dtmpson, I hnve noticed that young
van Durcn always walks on tho lelt
when with Miss Smlthers. Know why?"
"Sure. Miss Smlthers Is left-handed
and always puts her hatpins In on that
siuc. national -Monthly.
"There Is one irrent drawback which
will always exist to the serving by
ivumen on juries.
"What la that?"
"They can't play poker while waiting
for the ono obstinate member to come
over to the majority." Baltimore Ameri
Mike Do yez believe In the recall of
i-ai xnat i uo. The last time I was
DR. BRADBURY DENTIST
1500 Faraam Street. ao sum (Mflo. Phone Dong. 17M
Extracting S5o Up sHj19 Missing Teeth supplied
Fillings SOc Vp JPHflHHHk without Plates or Hrldgo-
Orldgevrork ....$2.00 Vp S 1 i? W work. Nerves reasored
CrovfM I2.BO Up JWWfy without pain. WorkgBar
I'lates S2.00 Up A.l ft JLr an teed tea years. '
ImieJ 01 fax"
The Most Popular Priced,
Strictly First Class Mineral
Water Resort in America
Special 1914 Winter and Spring Rates
Cf .00 Per Week for Rooms
414 and Meals
The famous Colfax Mineral Water has a reputation for relief and
cure of Rheumatism, Liver and Stomach troubles.
In tho LaWes" and Men's Mineral Baths you will find tho very
best equipment and skilled attendants.
SSi" l?J2f5 T1""00 of h.8 Hock Island Railway. All trains
For further information ask any Rock Island
agent or -write Hotel Colfax and Mineral Sprines,
Colfax, Iowa. '
a real estate man
a real estate loan company
a trust company
will find a great saving of t'rnio by liaving.an
office closo by tho court house and city hall.
The Bee Building
, "The Building that is always new"
is tho- uowest building in Omaha on tho
inside; tho oldest, the most substantial
.and the handsomest on the outside.
Wo can offer you an office home now; perhaps in
a few weoks we cannot. Better look at these now.
The finest location In the city for men having business
or patrons in or around the city and county buildings
Js at Room 406. Farnam street exposure, with three
- windows overlooking court house plana. Roqra has
water, vault and large private office. Easily access
Another very desirable office with vault, water and
large outside windows, east exposure, is at Room 338.
Cioga to elevators and opening on the wide open hall
; surrounding the beautiful court of the building. The
f ease with which this room can be reached makes it
a great time saver. Space can be arranged for 18 ft.
by 32 ft. at 950.00
Or 36 ft. by 32 It. at,,, --.......,..$100.00
The lawyer or abstracter who gets Room 550, with its
large Farnam street windows facing directly on tho
court house, is sure ot one ot the best located of
fices in Omaha. 14 'ft. by 20 ft., with water Included.
Partitions for two private offices and reception room.
Also close to elevators. Xow at $30,00
For offices apply to the Superintendent, Room 103,
The Bee Building Co,
up beforo his honor he ees: "I teaall
that face. Sixty days." Pm agin the
recall of Judges. Life.
WHERE BRAINS ARE NEEDED.
S. K. Klser In Chicago Record-Herald.
"I claim It takes mora brains to farm,'
said Ebencser Brown.
"Than what It does to git ahead and
make a splosh in town; ,
"Why, I know six or seven chaps from
this here neighborhood
Who went away to cities, whero they're
busy makln' good.
"You tak Chicago and New York elzo
up the big men there
The lawyer, doctor, merchant nnd tho
You'll find they've all been farmer boys.
or lived In towns, at least.
Where they could have a chance to learn
the ways of bird and beast.
"Now, tako these city chaps who como
to cultivate tho land
I don't mean millionaires who farm for
fun, you understand .
But take the common city folks who try
- to farm, and sayt
It's pitiful tho way they try to make their
"I'vo saw a doren ot 'cm fall; I never
seen ono yet
Who managed to bo prominent or not get
Into debt: ,
And so I claim a man may make an
awrul splash in town
And not have brains enough to farm.
said Ebcnezer Brown.