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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 16, 1914)
4 P IE BEE: OMAHA, MONDAY, FEBRUARY 36, 1914. THE OMAHA DAILY BEE UfNUKU DY BbWARD HQ3KWATKII. VICTOR ROSBWATSR. KPITOR. MrtS Bt'lLDlNO. FARNAM AND ITTH. " Knti-rf i at Omaha postotflce as second- is mailer TERMS OF tCBSCRlPT10NS. tfumuy one year w faturasy Dee. one ear -J2 Daily He, without Sunday, one year.. 4.w I 'ally Bee ana Hundsy, one year t.CO DELIVERED BY CARRIER 1 renins and Sunday Bee. per month. -49 Kvening. without Sunday, per month..- tally Bee, Including Sunday, per raa-.w Dally Bee. without Sunday, per month. we Address all complaints of Irregularities . . deliveries to City Circulation Dept. REMITTANCE. . , Remit by draft. express or postal order, j.ayable to The Bee Publishing company. Only .'-cent stamps received in payment of small accounts. Personal check, ex cept on Omaha and eastern exchange, not accepted. OFFICES. Omaha The Bee Building. tioutt Omaha Zttl N Street. 1 Council Bluffs u North Main Street, i IJncoln K Uttle Building. OnJcaxo K)l Hearst Building. Now Tork-Room 11M. KS Fifth Avenue. St. Louis C New Bank of Commerce. Washington- TK Fourteenth BL N. W. CORRESPONDENCE. Communications relating to news and editorial matter should be addressed unai'f Bee, KlltorUl Department JANUARY CIRCULATION. 50,542 Stat of Nebraska. County of Douglas, ss.: Dwlght Williams, circulation manager of Tne Beo Publishing company, being duly sworn, says that the averse dally circulation for the month of January, 1111. Was XJM2. D WIGHT WILLIAMS. Circulation Manager. Subscribed in my presence and sworn to before- this Sd day of February. IMC ROBERT HUNTER, (Seal) Notary Public. Subscriber leaving? the city len porarlly ahonld have The Bee mailed to tbcni. Address trill be cbanwed as often as requested. The weather man. must have been UilKlng through his Medicine Hat. Jteports indicate that Tammany Hall's barometer is Just now Tery low. Spring Gowns Tight With Loose feet. -Headline. Looks like a straddle. Ef. The Storm King Is now giving east a tasto of his company. Well, turn about Is fair play. Although Mendota, III., pays its mayor $60 a year, ho has gone on a strike. Some folks demand tho -world. By saving tho secretary at Uie critical moment, Mrs. Bryan has certainly earned a Carnegio hero medal. . New York has essayed the task of regulating the billboards Beat ing Tammany would be a snap by comparison. Wonder what Uncle Andrew thinks of his world peace plans bow that the suffs have burned a Car negie library. By tho multiplication of its com mittees, the Commercial club should soon be In a position to have com mittee places for all. Mr. Hearst is now engaged In the amusing winter sport of lecturing President Wilson on "A Question of Honor, National and Personal." Villa did not cat that Christmas dinner In the capital; neither has lie yet ended the war, though no longer hindered by tho embargo. Ak-Sar-Ben lost $6,600 through its guaranty of a wild west show last fall. Bxperleoco Is the best schoolmaster though the tuition fees generally como high. When It, comes to weather eyes, consider the Washington millionaire tho has employed & woman lawyer to defend him against a charge of alienation of affections. Wonder if Georgia democrats now can work up as hot and acri monious, a contest "for the Bacon succession as is now on the boards in Alabama between Underwood and Hobson. The best proof that conditions are muddled In Nebraska on all sides of tueTpolltlcal fence is to be found in the slowness of the sprout ing of the boomlets expected to bloom In the spring. Bf Solomon wus cs wise as dey say be tvut how come he didn't quit Ions 'fo' ht did? F&nk L. Stanton In Atlanta Constitution. The innocent old darkey, of course, could not appreciate the bold all those wires bad on him. When they go to call the roll of great satirists they should not omit the name of Charles Francis Murphy pf New York, who says: I'll be very Slad to aid In any effort to uplift the party-lf "uplift" Is the word If It needs rtorganiiatlen. Had the currency act offered first comers Inducements in the na ture of trading stamps or other prizes, the applications of the banks to qualify as reserve members would doubtless have come In faster. Mr. Bryan' explains that be is fighting the Roger Sullivan candi dacy for the democratic nomination tot United State senator In Illinois entirely oa bis own personal account- lf.be were not premier of the cabinet he might do that with out, Involving the president, but un der the circumstances, Roger's friends will be inclined to retort In lie language of Mayor Jim. "Tell that to the marines." The Literacy Test Doomed. The president's announced decision to stand by our established Immigra tion poller and veto the literacy tost bill If It comes to him from the sen ate In its present form Is gratifying, though not surprising. Every at tempt yet made by class Interests to enforce the literacy test has failed and more than once chiefly because of executive opposition. There is no reason. It seems to us, why President Wilson should depart from the rule of fitness, which has become a na tional policy. The literacy test is both unjust and ineffectual because it docs not test the immigrant's physical, moral or Intellectual status or determine his warthlnpits for Amprlenn cttlzpnithin. .. . . . . ... Those who contend that it does either ! do not know or chooso to ignore what private and public statisticians bavo discovered, that the most apparent cause of Illiteracy in Europe, as else where, is poverty; that the economic status of a people has a vital effect on the literacy rate and that one fac tor In the economic condition of a family Is the need of children's serv ices at home. According to Dr. Isaac H. Hourwlch's accepted work on "Im migration and Labor," tbo ratio among tho immigrants Is considera bly lower than among their country men who remain at home. Statistics, he says, "prove that, measured by In tellectual standards, the average Im migrant Is above the arcragc of his countrymen who remain behind." No law prescribing an educational test should bar from our land tho otherwise worthy man or woman with the grit to leave all that is dear to take tho hard chances of betterment in a far and strange country. Oar Sagging Trade Balance. This game of sec-saw between im ports and exports Is not coming out under the new tariff quite as our democratic friends said it would, in stead of exports gaining ovor Imports' according to the treasury statement for December, 1913, there was a loss of more than $46,000,000 from tho balance of trade in favor of the United States in December, 1912. Last December showed about $29, 000,000 In Imports over those of De cember, 1912, under tho Payne-Al-drlch tariff. Our exports underwent no increase in values, but actually showed a loss of $17,000,000. In short, the balance of trade in our favor dropped during December from about $97,000,000 to about $51,000,000. And the prospect Is no brighter than, the retrospect. Thus far the Underwood-Wilson tariff has failed of specifications as a trade-balance preserver. Yet gains In exports hold ing tho balance In our favor are es sential to the maintenance of our credit, and, further, taking the dem ocrats at their word, to any approach of a solution of our high cost prob lem. We cannot continue this ratio long without wiping out all the bal ance In trade achieved under the old tariff. Unappreciative. Under tbo caption, "Respectable Smuggling," the Outlook, carrying the name "Theodora Roosevelt, con tributing editor," adverts to the re cent case of tho Lltauer brothers as follows; An Interesting leisl point has since betn raised, whether this conviction and suspended sentence deprive the two men of their civil rlshtslhat Is to say, of their right to vote or to become candl dates for office. This point Is of pecu liar Interest in this connection, because Lucius Littauer. a well known glove manufacturer of OloversvUte, X. Y., Is one of the prominent republicans of this state, and was a member of congress from 1S9T to IXC, where he was an ardent protectionist. Irrespective of the merits such reference seems to be particularly inappropriate coming from this source. More than half the period of Mr. Littauer's incumbency in congress coincided with that or Mr. Roosevelt's occupancy of the White House, the two being con stoutly working together both In legislation and in politics. But more than that, in the strenuously fought preliminaries of the last republican national convention in Chicago, Mr, Llttauec was one of Mr. Roosevelt's principal unafraid men in the fir ing line squad, holding a Roosevelt proxy as a member of the commit tee, and voting regularly as tho Roosevelt managers directed. These facts are recalled not by way of rubbing It in or exculpating any one, but merely showing how far the Outlook is going out of Its way to find somo connection be tween Mr. Littauer's smuggling and his former position of prominence In the republican party. Democratic politicians are after the scalp of President James of the state university on the ground that he maintains a "political rule." It is evidently a matter of who does the ruling that bothers these poll ticlans. Venner, the man with the ham mer. Is still knocking on Omaha's credit. Perish the thought that tbo prompt return of his $5,000 forfeit might have persuaded blm to change his tune. The, New York legislature de clares by resolution that "a chicken Is a chicken up to the age of S." But a, a tenderer age It often seems otherwise Jopldn flacWardf; t jhlsjjay in Omaha1 rMuro rsox arc nus FEBRUARY 16. Thirty Years Ago The county commissioners as-pointed J. H. MeCulloch to serve the unexpired term of County Judge Chad wick. Mr. MeCulloch is comparatively unknown to our great mass of people, having; been In Oiraha but two and a half years, but Is well recommended by his fellows at the bar. Another meeting of North Omaha prop erty owners to consider the opening of Severteenth street was held In Smith's planlnc mill. J. O. Corby presided and M. M. Sears acted as secretary. A num ber of committees were appointed to take up various matters, one consisting of Messrs. Brown. Morley and Ocburn and snother of George Smith, Joseph Red man and M. 31. Sears. The directors of the Union Pacific Ath letic association elected Charles Jf. Rohr manager for the ensuing year. They are also considering giving the club a grand ball some time in April. H. J. Rohrbach. father of Mrs. P. K. Bpaulding of this city, was seriously In jured In a railroad accident near Mem phis. He was returning; to Carthage, HI., from a visit to his daughter In Omaha. Hon R. R. Livingstone of Plattsmouth. Lou May of Fremont and B. E. B. Kenredy of this city, composing: the State Board of Fish Commissioners, held a meeting here this afternoon to arrange for the distribution of 1W.0C0 trout now hatching m the hatcheries at South Bend. Twenty Years Ago Mr. Tlscher was taken to St. Joseph's hoepltal so badly frozen, that It was feared he would die, or at least lose both legs. Mrs. J. jr. Crl, druggist at Twenty fourth and Lake, whose hou u, .sacked by a burglar, says the burglar did not overlook 113. as reported, for the wu surncient reason that no such amount was lying around. He got her purse with Sl( and !M In Jewelry, but she resented the Imputation that she was so poor a business woman as to have J carelessly lying about in her apartments while she was out, Joseph s. Hartley, state treasurer, came up from Lincoln and stopped, as usual, at the Millard. D. J. O'Connell, editor and proprietor of the Northwestern Catholic, was In the city negotiating for the establishing of a branch office here. Rew Newton 31. Mann epoke at Unity murcn on "Trie sun. John M. Thurston arrived from SL Louis, expressing entire- satisfaction with Judge Caldwell's disposition of the- mat ter laid before Mm for the Union Pacific by Thurston and John C. Cowln. Thurs ton said Caldwell's Instruction to revoke the order cutting off employes and wages put the employes' matter back Into the hands of the receivers, who must settle It Mesntlmo Thurston expected to at tend to his own knitting, as Judge Dundy Issued the order. Thurston said he did not know whether the receivers would ask for Its revocation or not. Ten Years Ago- state fcenator W. If. Harrison pf Grand Island let It be known that his candidacy for the republican nomination for governor had reached full-tlcdred proportions and would ketp on extend ing. His agents were at work In all portions of the state, including Omaha. "I look for great development In the facilities for irrigation during this year." sale El wood Mead, chief of the division of Irrlcatlon and drainage of tho De partment of Agriculture, who was In Omaha on a leave of absence. The annual banquet of the Nebraska Underwriters' association held at the Metropolitan hall proved one of the most enjoyable ever held. H. P. Nrely and John Dale were the orators of the even ing and President G. W. Noble presided, white Miss Laura Goeti, Miss Elizabeth Howe. Mrs. Noble and Master Morton Qould sang and J, M. Glllan and Miss Kale B. Bwartilander gave recitation. rostoffice employ s presented Joseah Crow, retiring postmaster, with a hand some silver act costing J3. The Incom ing pottmaster. Captain H. E. Palmer, wss present at tho presentation. The board of directors of the Tounr Men's Christian association met and or ganized by the appointment of commit tees for the construction of the new building. VT. P. Harford was mfl chairman of the site committee, .the site not as yet having been decided 'on. Peoi)le and Events An official quls in Massachusetts de- veloped the fact that Theodore X. Vail, president of the American Telephone and Telegraph company, draws a salary of ziw,a a year. Count Bonl de Casu.'iane harms tou?ntd me oouid millions to the limit. says he would not marry an American again. Surely not,-lf the girl sees him first. As proof of feminine goodness. Fhila delphla sends on the rounds the state ment that "Miss Catherine Dclham has not missed a Sunday at Sunday school for the last ten years." Pass the cake to Kate. Awakened by a coU in his chicken coop, John Oentlle of Edmonton. Alb. captured the thief and discovered It to be a pure black fox, for which he has stnee refused an offer of W.00O. As tbe result of the confession of convicted horse thltf, W. J. Smith of Indianapolis, Is trying to recover from Jesse Henderiieh. a man stolen seven years ago. which has been ever since the undisputed property of Henderiieh. Tbe latter bought It from tha thief and had no reason to suppose that h was not its rightful owner. President Wilson awarded the Red Cross gold medal of merit to Mlas Jane A. Delano for her services In organizing the town and county nursing service. This has been established by the Amerl can Red Cross, which makes It possible In a few hours tune to get any number of nurse required for active service for tbe Red Cross. Prof. A. E, Jenks. of the University of Minnesota, has started on an expedition In the course of which he will study tbe Papago and Pima Indians of Arizona, tbe Berbers and Kabyle In the mountains of Northern Africa. Italians in the proy (nets of Southern Italy, the Magyars of Hungary, the Poles and Bohemians as they llvo in their own country places. the stone Implements of Spain and France and Uelplum Twice Told Tales Willie's Invention. Wnon MtUe Willie's mother opened the door to the vicar her face beamed with Joy and welcome. In spHe of the fact that It was washing day. This Is a real pleasure, sir," she be gan. "I've bees waiting to thank ye for the good you've done our Willie by your evening classes. Home's as dif ferent again since he attended the plumb ing and gas-fitting class!" "This Is, Indeed, gratifying-very!" said the vlear. "Xow, what Improvement have you noticed especially in little Willie of later "Well, he's arranged our penny-ln-the-slot gas meter so that we get our gas for nothing. Tou see, he's moved It from the scullery to outside the front door. sir." "But you still have to put your pennies In the slot, my good woman!" "Ah, but you nee, sir, before he put the meter in the road, our WIUIo wrote 'Chocolates' over the slot!" London An swers. Ahsence of father. A smile flitted over the features of Congressman Jeremiah Donovan of Connecticut when his eyes rested on the motto: "If smoking Interferes with busi ness, quit business." He said It remindel him of Jones. At a a o'clock tea one afternoon the women guests were lauding tho glories of their respective husbands when It came Mrs. Jones' turn to do the eulo gistic. "I must say." contributed the proud wife Just a little eagerly, "that Harry Is one of the best husbands on earth. He doesn't drink, smoke nor chew, and goes to church very regularly, or, that is, he used to." "He used to!" quickly Interrupted one of the fair listeners. "Doesn't he go to church now? "So," was the frank rejoinder of Jlrs. Jones. "He learned to play golf and says that churchgolng Interferes with the game." Philadelphia Telegraph. Appropriated the Comnllment. Mr. Tlmkln gave a party and a Christ mas play for his children. Before the curtain rose he made a speech. "Ladles and gentlemen and grown-up folks," he began, "we take pleasure In presenting this marvelous, scintillating Christmas spectacle before so stylish and handsome an audience. " Next day Mrs. Sprfggs asked Jlr. Tlm kln whether he had noticed the new gown worn at the party by Miss Elvira Sprlggs, aged S. "To tell the truth," said Mr. Tlmkln. I was so much preoccupied with the cintlllating spectacle that I didn't no tice anything, even Elvira's dress." Elvira looked up accusingly. "Why, Uncle John!" she satt "you said you did In your speech." New York Post. Aroimd the Cities Cincinnati ha? abolished rule against employing married women as public school teaohent. The city council of Akron. O., opens Its meeting with prayer by the president, who also shuts out smoking during the session. Milwaukee's lawyer "ambulance chas ers" are promised a run for their money. The local bar association proposes to ex. elude them from membership. Providence. R. I., proposes limiting the width of vehicles permitted to use the streets to eeven feet eight Inches, and their capacity weight to ten tons. The Omaha grain market handled CS3 carloads of grain during January, 1314, as against S,3fl3 carloads during the same month last year. Shipments amounted to (.Ml carloads. Chicago offers the longest street car ridp In the world for 5 cents twenty eight miles. In Omaha, for the same price, a passenger can go thirteen miles straight away without transfer. Greater New Tork has a debt of tl .000,000,000, and proposes to add to It XX9,0oa,0CO during the next four years. Sine the consolidation sixteen years ago the city's public debt has trebled. There were seventy building and loan associations In Nebraska at the close of the fiscal year last year, with assets totaling tH,7M,000. Seven associations In Omaha show assets of S19,693,0, or S3 per cent of the state's total. According to figures compiled by the National Highways Protective society from tho monthly reports of coroners. 502 persons were killed by automobiles In New York City in Kit, as against m In 1312. During the same period 108 were fatally injured by trolley cars and 112 by wagons In the city- Women's Activities The women's eight-hour law In Denver haa been made very sweeping In Its ap plication and now Includes boodkeepers. stenographers and cashiers, who are em nlored In mercantile, mechanical and manufacturing establishments. There are said to be but three states in the union where women may not prac tice law, Virginia. Arkansas and Georgia. Women have passed the examinations for the bar In Georgia, but have not been allowed to practice. Mr. Gertrude A. Lee. who was recently named chairman of the Democratic State committee, of Colorado, that she Is a "machine politician." By this she says she does not mean a corrupt body, but an organization pure in principle and certain In purpose. Mrs. W. K- Vanderbllt has directed that the campaign that she has begun against the promiscuous sale and use of cocaine shall not be confined to New York alone. but shall be continued In other states, aftsr most searching Investigations are made. She was horrified when she found to what extent the drug Is used and Is convtnoed that it has become a public menace. Camp Fir Girls Is an organization, to conduct outdoor work In the United States and foreign countries, that was Incorporated the other day tn Albany, N. T. The main object Is to perpetuate the spiritual ideas of the home under the new conditio as of a social community, to aid in the formation of habits making for health and vigor, to devise means for measuring and creating standards for women's work, to foster intimate rela tions between mother and daughter, and to develop a sympathetic understanding of the new economic relations into which women are coming. Thirty directors were named, among them Miss Ida Tarbcll and Mrs. Ernest Thompson Setan. Why People Do !Vot Co to Church. SOCTH OMAHA. Feb. ll.-To the ESdller sf The Bee: I saw by newspaper reportj a few days ago that a minister by the name of J. E. Crowther of New York City said that he hoped the day would soon come when the contribution plates will not be raised In the churches any more. It fei my opinion that taking up collec tions or contributions every Sunday two or three times drives as many people from the church as any other one cause. It is a fact that many who would go to churcn much oftener than they do dls tlka to have a contribution plate pased under their noses every time they attend divine services and feel so humiliated at not being able to give something each time that they stay at home, or at least stay away from churches on Sunday. Another thlngj when contributions are taken in churches the ceremony Is made as solemn as a funeral and Is made so stiff and formal that It Is really ludicrous. Then, the services are so very formal and carried out In the same manner ex actly every Sunday, so much so that the solemnity becomes oppressive. If you go to church on the first Sunday In Jan uary and do not go again until the next December, you know exactly before you go what tiresome and painfully formal ceremonies will be carried out Of course, there should be more or less solemnity In religious services, but It would not hurt to let up on the stiffness occasion ally. The only way to get more people to go to church and to get them to go oftener Is to let up on the formal ceremonies oc casionally and not make people feel that they are attending tho funeral of some dear friend every time they step inside the portals of a houso of worship. F. A. AG NEW. Lincoln Above Colombo. OMAHA, Feb. 15.-To the Editor of The Bee: I believe congress should enact a law making February 12 of each year a. legal holiday In commemoration of the birth of Abraham Lincoln, perhaps the noblest character this nation has ever produced. Much is said tn praise, of this great man upon each anniversary of hts birth, and It Is hard to understand why his name Is not perpetuated In a more suitable way by the lawmakers of this nation. It appears to be the universal opinion of all true American people that he was our most lovable character. An attempt Is being made to railroad through congress a bill to make Colum bus day a legal holiday. This should never become a law, because It does not appeal to all tho American people and Is in me Interests of one religious creed only. There aro several reasons whv thin proposed bill should not become a law. ! Ono Is that he was not an American. 1 Another is this proposed holiday Is sec- i tnrian and Is against the wishes of the vast majority of the American people. Our coming generation should not be taught to revere the memory of this m.w elmply because he happened to discover mis continent. . I do not believe the time is rin for a religious holiday, whether It be Catholic or Protestant, but we should always be willing to perpetuate the memory of such nooie cnaracter as Abraham Lincoln was, and his every act sprung from a heart that represented the highest type of American citizenship, and he gave up his life to an assassin In the defense of those principles. Long may the mninrv of Abraham Lincoln live. C. L. W IOCS Harney St. Damage Snltc. OMAHA. Feb. H.To the Editor of The Bee: Tho man of wealth Is too often counted respectable whether he follow mat line of conduct which virtue and religion prescribes or not, but if he be sued at law, it will not be done In order to punish him. but for the purpose of col lecting damages: and there axa DeoDle In this world that are so lost to all sense of honor that they would gladly publish every secret sin and shame of their whole lives, if by so doing they might wear a golden girdlle and be Immersed tor a whllo In n state of Indolence and luxury. The man of wealth is often a great sinner, yet there are men and women so utterly deaplcabje that m order to tap his money chest and collect a few paltry gold eagles, will take the witness stand and vomit up a mass of corruption that would astonish and alarm a naked Slwash Indian. A wealthy man. If he be somewhat shabby In his morals, will be made the prey of those wretches who desire to be led Into temptation at 10 much per lead; these miserable villains then undertake to collect damages for the loss of a char acter they never possessed, and twelve decent, respectable men are forced to sit and listen to their abominable confes sions, which a priest could scarcely hear without fainting. And these confessions are not made for the purpose of divesting the heart and conscience of Its guilt and shame not made In order to cleanse the soul and restore activity to the spiritual nature, nor to mitigate the sentence of punishment pronounced by an offended dlety, oh no! These Idiots who heads contain an Insufficient quantity of brains, and whose hearts are as black aa the smok from hades, want nothing more than a few thousand In gold certificates an absolution of dollars and cents. Charles the Bald declared war wlUi the Swiss over a eart load of sheepskins; the bishops condemned Jeanne D'Are and burned her In the market place at Rousn; and yet these men msy still bo said to have had a conscience: but men and women who boast of. and confess their erimes for a financial consideration, have certainly reached the lowest depth of degradation. Theso damage suits are always pending In our courts, and we know not whether to pit) or despise thece blackmailers, or ' whether or net to conclude that vben people lose their virtue they loeo tbeir brains with iu A. O. M INTOSH. . expense Hens Overlooked, ' Philadelphia Bulletin. The "cost" of the postal emice, as officially 'urured. never Includes the cost of housing the service, the interest on government bonds issued or money In vested la postofflce building; If It did the deficit 'never would be wiped out Apparently the advocates of national tel ephones do not Include sueh cost in their estimates, for they suggest that the gov ernment need not purchase aay of th I real estate of the telephone oomjiaBiej temporarily renting building, until ac commodation could be provided In the postofflces and stations. But the go -' eminent cant get along without its ex 1 changes and It must pay for them In one! ws or another I Editorial Sif tings Washington Post. As Senator Norris vicwi the situation, tbe home of Morgan took about everything from the New Jiav;n except the wwow. St. Louis Republic: Let as notM that the Balkans will hare fririsfced snirysng 1 their dend and that Mexico, Hattf. Perl and Ecuador wtll har ssneothed out j .W)r dp yo wru FO mSLny letters to their internal affairs before the peace the newspapers, old roan? Do you nup eonferenco meets at The Hague In IMS. i Pe anybody wants to see your views in Boston Transcript. Admiral Slgsbee's declaration that the Panama eanal means that we must have a larger navy will surprise those who had been supposing all along that the Wg ditch would make! every one of our battleships as good as two. Pittsburgh Dispatch: General Smuts j advances the excuse for the deportation of labor leaders from South Africa, that mcj nere guiuy 01 conspiracy, DUt that. tho courts would not have convicted them. That Is a stock excuse, for lynch ing In this country, but In one place as In the other It Is false In one premise or the other. New Tork World: Not the least Inter esting aspect of tho present movement of rapid-fire gun3 toward the Mexican frontier Is the escort of skilled working men provided by the manufacturers, as is usual m such ca,es. Cannons. )ikeTuTRot a fine pUce W. but where auiuuiuuiie!, carry ineir own uemonstra- tors. It appears. I T.m, J 4 r- . , .1 Baltimore American: Colonel Goethals, I as governor of the canal zone, will have I power to appoint and fix the salaries of 2VJ men. nd politics will cut Rbso-1 luieiy no riguro in this power, which thought must be driving the politicians of the nation half mad with the awful waste of such splendid opportunity. Springfield Republican: It was ridicu lous for the senate to pass the Norrla resolution directing the Interstate Com merce commission to probe the New Ha ven again, after tho commission, through letters of Messrs. Prouty and Clark, had stated that a senate probe would co deeper, under the constitution and the ""'p me commission's probe could possibly go. The senate seems to have shrunk from doing its own Investigating. Or was It all a gallery play? GRINS AND GROANS. That mui) follows tho medical profes sion," said tho grouch. "That so?" said the boob. "Is he a doctor?" "Naw." replied the gtouah. "He's an undertaker." Cincinnati Enquirer. "I despise a hypocrite. "So do I." "Now, tak Jackson, for example, he's the biggest hypocrite on earth." "But you appear to be his best friend." "Oh, yes: I try to appear friendly to- The Most Popular Priced, Strictly First Class Mineral Water Resort in America Special im Winter and Spring Rates f 5.00 Pi Week for Rooms 41J, and Meals , The famous Colfax Mineral Water has a reputation for relief and cure of Rheumatism, Liver and Stomach troubles. In tho LaTSes' and Men's Mineral Baths you will And the very best equipment and skilled attendants. Colfax is located on main ifae of tbe Rock Island Railway All tralm For further information ask any Rock Island agent or write Hotel Colfax and Mineral Sprines. Colfax, Iowa. ' E5S USEE ward him. it pays belter in the end. -Boston Adrtlser Mrs Wlegs-Isnt It queer how men change after you marry them? Mrs. IWggs-lt Is that Do you know that when I decided to wed jaen, my parents aertooely objected because he wss a spendthrift-St Louis Republic, ..You e4tl t 0,nr that the country his enormous wealth. " 1 1 ., V. m r 'fill, T .., M, iffinnlna: to think thl country is suffering from misplaced pros 1 pertly. "-Washington Star. , -Welt. It's belter than talking to your- self." Judge "Bill fell olf the water wagon Ust nlcht. and what do you think was the first thing hr said?" ilUM.nl 4. tiltlaf rutrrAt'? 1 .. ""t 'J.l'ltf ror a i)lck-mo-up,"-Bsl- ilmnr, American. ; ''You say tere are n f raiie " ..Slow So vo'u account .for their dlsap. PC"v"?o tell you tho truth, I fancy they have all gotten rich and retired. Washington Star. "A wlfo get a third of her husband s property, doeon't she?" "Why, 1 thought the law save that to a'INo!'"o,niy0''to his wldow. '-Battlmote American. Visitor (who has Inspected thy Bans- are your patients : . .... Superintendent They're under the beds, tMne the sprlng.-3t Louis Republic. - THE BED OF TODAY. New York Globe. Come. let's drop a tear for the old-fash-toned bed , . ., That stood on Its legs, stout and able. And was what It teemed. Now we have. Instead, Console and "convertible tabic. There's also the door that Is not a. door Nor yet Is "a Jar" (seo Joe Miller), But when It let's down Is a bed; nothing more , , Unless It's a mantrap and killer. That Innocent looking and tufted divan. -t. 1,1 ,1 j t.-r... j u v0u touch the right spring In Its in- trtcate Dlan. Through the celling the thing may pro ject you 'Tls a bed! And a bed is yon seeming bookcaso And also that counterfeit closet There Is scarcely a thing In the whole blooming place That has not a bed on deposit! With horror I view every night in the flat. "The Victim. Asleep, Presses Button" (Thus the headline may read), "Is Trapped Like a Rati" And so should my sheep become mut ton! I shall sleep on the floor and of freak things beware So long as a flat I must keep in. There are beds here and there yes, beds everywhere. But never a bed fit to sleep in! I t
