Nebraska Newspapers

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THE 01LULV SUNDAY BEE: JANUARY IS, 1914.
Tms Omaha Sunday Bee.
FOUNDED BT EDWARD ROSKWATBU
VICTOR ROSKWATER, EDITOR.
BED BUILDING, FARNAM AND I'Tlt.
Entered at Omaha postottlce as second
clam matter.
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of small accounts. Personal checks, ex
cept on Omaha and eastern exchange, not
accepted.
Lincoln-! Lltllo building.
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No- York-Room 1106, 285 Fifth avenue.
St. Louls603 New Bank of Commerces
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Communications relating to news and
editorial matter should be addressed
Omaha Bee, Editorial department.
DEO. STTNDAY CIRCULATION
43,594 .
BtaU -of; Nebraska, County of Douglas, ss.
D wight Williams, circulation manager
of The Bee Publishing company, being
duly worn, says that the average Sun
day circulation for the month of Decem
ber, mi, was 43.GM. D WIGHT Wit..
1,1 AM a Circulation Manager.
Subscribed In my presence and sworn
toto before me this 3d day of Jnnuary,
1M4. ROBERT HUNTER,
Notary Public.
pontrllr shonld have The Bee malted
to them. Address vflU be changed
us often as requested.
Somo enterprising photographer
may now get a dissolving view of tho
Kodak trust.
Wonder If Medlcino Hat has
switched to one of those fussy, wuz'zy,
green creations.
And when tempted to roplno over
you'r lot, Just remember somebody
els has a tougher one. 1
Ifuerla evidently koopB a reserve
supply of promissory notes with
which to meet tho ultimatums falling
due.
Mr. Rockefeller predicts an early
spring. And ho is probably as good
A gucsscr on tho weathor as any other
prophet.
A Seattle politician wes sent to tho
workhouse for loafing. There is n
Up to tho administration's plo distributer.
Never mind, Governor "Mot," Just
Join the "Don't Worry" club, andW
what is to come afterwards take care
t)t itself.
What of American Morals?
Aro we in America moro or less im
moral today than formerly? Aro wo
moro or less sensitive to tho finer
distinctions of moral and intellectual
honesty and modesty? Havo wo
turned more closely toward or fur
ther awny from the old tenets of
morality than our fathers lived?
These aro all parts of the one dom
inant question of the day, "What's
wrong with our morals?" which,
among others, is propounded by a
writer in tho Forum, who supplies
this Interesting answer: "Progress."
He does not admit that wo aro moro
Immoral or worse In any way than
formerly, but says as to tho matter
of our morals:
Wo aro growing. And growing, we aro
suffering from nothing more alarming
than tho usual and natural growing pains.
You may call this a period of unrest, or
go further, as some do. and call It revo
lution. At any rate. It Is a period of re
adjustment of social, mental and moral
housoclcanlng. For civilization faces new
problems. Their solution means a long
step forward. And, In order to take the
step which the presentation of these
problems has fortunately precipitated,
civilization In finding It necessary to dis
card much of Its superfluous rubbish of
outworn and now ridiculous convention,
for new standards moro strictly in accord
with natural demands and common sense.
Could anything be moro rational
or reasonable? No, wo aro not lost In
tho meshes of immorality so long an
wo aro so alert to odr social .status,.
solicitous of this very inquiry. In
addition to the sensation of our grow
ing pains, wo aro simply experiencing
tho acuta effects of social discontent,
which has figured vitally In the de
velopment of mankind from Its
origin. Even though tho social organ
ism bos been tainted with new evils
and plagues, they are not of control
ling force so long as wo aro keenly
allvo to them and actively engaged
in diagnosis and prescription. It will
bo tirao to worry ovor our morals
when wo grow callous' and indiffer
ent to wrong doing and wrong living,
go far from lapsing Intd such dosuo
tudo as yot, wo find oursolves really
in tho transport or agitation ap
proaching at times vcrltablo hysteria.
And wo must get out of this to do
oursolves Justice.
Prnirmas! The Forum writer is
correct, wo think. Wo are., progress
ing. developing, growing moro rap
idly than we havo at any other tlmo
in our national life and of course are
constantly mooting up with now ana
difficult problems. What poople In
any tlmo or country have done bettor
than wo In Adjusting themselves to
tho processes of change? What people
ever had so strenuous a usk, or ex
perienced . bo many .'nd varies
changes as are comlng; to us. Just
now? '
rulo thinks better of Brown than ho
does is that other historians have
suppressed salient facts in writing
about this strange old fanatic.
White evon his most ardent spon
sors do not deify John Brown,
neither is this belated portrayal apt
to overturn tho historical impression
of a character so critically dissected
ind analyzed and refracted through
a crucible of severest public opinion
such as followed tho Kansas and
Harper's Ferry depredations. As a
soldier of fortune which very ap
propriately forma tho namo of the
now book John Brown displayed
faults as glaring and deeds as repre
hensible as any adventurer, but that
ho was Inspired from tho first by
baso and mercenary motives is not,
and wo think, will not become, do
spito this author's effort, tho ac
cepted vlow.
Spare "the Tree.
Evoryono admits tho economic
value of trees, therefore forestry
preservation looking to utilitarian
purposes is moro apt to succeed
In this ago than If promoted
obviously, the problem Is not so seri
ous. These schools, maintained large
ly on direct public gifts, havo to
watch tho corners of economy very
closely and ono of thorn in tho middle
west succeeds very handily by apply
ing this rule: "This college does not
permit the uso of tobacco, to say
nothing of liquor, among its stu
dents. It does not arguo tho right
or wrong of using tobacco. It simply
says that tho young man who can
afford money for tobacco can afford
to go elsewhero for his education,
vacating his place here for another
not so well off financially as he. Wo
aro Baying to our friends, 'Theso
young peoplo coming to us cannot
afford tho expenso of an education
anywhere else,' and our friends aro
responding generously, but wo can
not stultify ourselves by accepting
their money to cducato boys "who
wasto their own."
Very naturally tho effect of this
policy extends to other matters be
side tho uso of tobacco.
As to Jury Reform.
Our 1nwvnr f r Inn Ha nrn nffitn in
merely from sentimental consldora- th(j Qf th(jlr por,odlo ngUatlon
lions. inis me now rouwumiD
forestry association recognizes In
irrocooding from tho practical stand
point that "peoplo who contemplate
clearing timber will stop to consldor
whothor the value of tho cleared
ground is not exceedod by tho value
of tho tract with the trees standing,
as concerns rainfall, soli preserva
tion, actual cash productiveness and
natural beauty." Tho influence of
such an organization, backed by rep-1
rcscntatlvo citizens, whoso primary
purdoso Is tho creation of a vast
pork along tho Missouri river south ,hn nrmnt mnf, nt
. -..... .. . , x 1 . I a- o
at Bouiu uuiaun, snouiu in lime uu
felt throughout tho state. The Bee
And what about tho owners of tho
property in' the city used with their
knowledge'' for immoral and,' Illegal
purposes?
. Taking all things together, tho
tanks seem to bp doing" tolorably woll
Recording to tholr reports to the
comptroller.
Senor Villa eaya he learned to read
and write in Jail. If Senor Huorta
had his way he might take a post
graduate course there.
That Los Angoles Judgo probably
(lees not intend to Imprison all tho
ipjkn la, town who, "take the namo of
the Lord in vain" as ho did that one.
Way down deep, however, lies tho
frict that all these dona of vlco. exist
only ca patronage that cornea from
UK various "respoctahle" walks of
life.
Here is a Titanic survivor sorry ho
ecaped because he is unable to sup
jwjrt himself and wife. It Is hard
evea for Providence to plcaso some
folks.
Kaiser Wilhelm devotes much time
to sawing wood on his country ca
tates. There Is a vague suspicion
that Senor Huerta is something of a
wood-eawr, himself.
It is about time for Mr. Carnegie's
prize dispensers to recognize the tel
ephona girls, who havo savod tho day
again as heroines In the minimizing
of Maryland coast flood losses.
has boon a pioneer In advocating
not only preserving but planting
moro timber In Nebraska, and It very
naturally finds merit in tho main
plan of this association. Even from
tho standpoint of scenic beauty, the
desirability of preserving and Im
proving tho forestry in this locality!
must bo apparent to all.
An Entente Cordlale.
Tho tlmo was when antipodes
rnnvnvod tho thought of limitless
.I, tmltrlrlsnahle nOaCO. but it
nut 'o -
moans vory little, today with nations
tied togother in poocoful pursuits of
science and industry, mo norrur
ot Southern Japan's -earthquake
sends a thrill ot genuine Borrow and
sympathy to tho heart of other na
tlons and InBtantly they are set to
works of mercy for tho afflicted.
President Wilson as commandor-
ln-chlet ot tho peaceful and pulBsant
army of tho Rod Cross Is promptly
In tho field mobilizing' his forcos ot
relief, Bonding forth general orders
for tho collection of funds to bo lor
warded to tho sufferers on tho op
poalto Bide of tho gloho. And Amor
leans, pained, at Japan's auucuon
delight to boIzo upon this occasion
for vlBUallzing their gonulno friend
ship for their groat and honorable
neighbors between whom and ub ex-
Ibts entente cordtalo, dosplte the low
mutterlngs of mischievous Jingoes
Still, we trust the Japanese exam
ple, of harl harl will not be followed
toy weather forecasters .over hero who
ia.lt down on predictions ot storms,
tidal waves and volcanic eruptions.
Mr. Rockefeller may be right lu
predicting an early spring, but all hlu
mooey Is not sufficient to bring any
special favors from the irreproacha
ble and Imperturbable weather man.
"Let thine eyes look right on and
let thine eyelids look straight before
thee," said the Psalmist, who was a
inWdle-of-tho-roadcr when It came to
pursuing the straight and narrow
PtV
"Blessed Is the man who walketh
nt I the counsel ot the ungodly, nor
BtsBeth In the way ot sinners, nor
lUta la the seat ef the scornful."
Faw.fcy, stand and gaze, sit down and
participate it is the logic of despair.
I the interval don't forget that
th auty to enforce the Albert law
cUcoIym upon the- county attorney.
JiMkt. 1cause the present lncumbont
r taat office happens to be a demo
era) 4oe not shift this burden over
to city official of whatever political
Glynn and the Pardon.
Govornor Glynn'a refusal to par
don a convicted usurer on tho offer
to release a largo number ot borrow
ers from tholr dohts to him may bo
taken as announcement that execu
tivo clemency is not on tho bargain
counter. Ills, rulo in general ot re
quiring endorsements of tho trial
Judgo and prosecutor boforo grant
ing pardons, and hiB action In tnta
particular case, ot getting away from
the pernicious Idea that restitution
nfter conviction constitutes a spoclal
claim for mercy, sets a good example
to other executives. We have seen
so much morbid sentlmontaltsm and
abuse of the pardoning power as to
mako us responslvo to the merit of
this precedent. This usuror neitner
provod nor alleged a miscarriage ot
itmtioo or any other possible ground
for overturning th veraict, ot iu
lurv. The governor a acuuu, iuwi
fnro. should tend to stimulate, nwv
only In the mind of this man, but
generally, an exalted idea or justice
ond a sternor respect rortno iaw
New View of John. Brown.
Is old John Brown ot Pottawatomie
.wi Turner's f erry raino to nav
. - - - ...
a redlvlvuB In literature? It mignt
havo been supposed that the last
book view of him had been ex
pressed, but bore is a new volume
with a view, wnicn, wnuo not en
tirely new, is by no means tne one.
generally accepted, by aa unpreju
diced world. The new book's view
Is a caustic; one, picturing Brown as
a colossal mountebank, Tjurely ot a
mercenary spirit and motive and a
cold-blooded murderer. Yet tho
writer explalna that ho is ot autl-
slavenr predilections. He charges
that one reason way the world, aa a
for Jury reform. Although the Jury
system dates from beforo tho Magna
Charta, wo must assume that it has
been steadily growing worso Instead
of, bettor, and that something des
perate must be done now to savo It.
Tho only trouble Is that the lawyers,
themselves, are disagreed as to what
shall bo dono for our particular
trouble, one sldo demanding a Jury
commissioner with autocratic pow
ers, and the othor somo mechanical
device of decimal selection.
xno report or the committee ar
The Say of Efficiency.
Invidious comparison tends to ob
scure relative merits. In tho urgent
call of tho present day for larger
offlcioncy in men and methods wo
often detect a false noto of reflection
upon previous times, when wo ought
to consider that they wore doubtless
as adequate then as are our Improvo-
drawlng Jurors declares that the law
now governing was enacted at tho
tlmo whon each county commissioner
know practically every resident of
his county, and had only a small
list to compile. Just to bring the
lawyers up to date on their law, let
us Inform them that tho present Jury
law for Douglas county la only a
dozen years.old, having been enacted
in 1901, and then as an amendment
to a Jury law that had been enacted
In 1889.
Prior to tho 1901 law wo had what
was practically a decimal system, tho
new. law enlarging the county com
missioners' discretionary powers,
and devolving on them responsibility
for exacting propor qualifications.
Tho outcry at that time was against
two legal loopholes which left It to
tho shorlff to, fill In with talesmen
looking )acWar
, 'JhisJ)ay in Omaha!
..1 w'
T
JANUARY 18.
Thirty Years Ago
Tho Omaha Ck-rman club gave one of
ita unique parties at the Millard with
larger attendance than beforo. The lead
ers in the german wero E. S. Kaff
Charles L. Deuel, Charles Beach and
Warren Itogcrs.
Relatives In this city received the sad
news of tho death of Mrs. Koch at Ban
Gabriel, Cal., whoro sho had gone In No
vember In tho hopo of recovering her
health.
Dr. C. E. Strnssbergcr has opened a
magnificent new bath establishment
which offers Omaha patients the best
Russian, Turkish, medicated and swim
ming baths with skilled attendants.
C, B. Brunncr Is receiving congratula
tions on his recovery from a long and
dangerous Illness.
Tho Rcntz-Santley company was
greeted by a full house last night. "While
there Is not a singer among tho number,
People and Events
sqA gmme A
ments now. In other words, tho
need for larger efficiency does not whonovor a Jury panel was oxhaustod,
arise from a state of deterioration and the county commissioners to
mako up a grand Jury list for later
elimination by lot. When tho sher
iff-was the Jury commissioner, it
was freoly charged thnt the Juries
wero deliberately packed against tho
victims of corporate greed, or loaded
with professionals, and that all
or inefficiency so much as tho en
lorgement ot tho task ot today. It
does not follow that because we find,
a pressing demand for more scien
tific effort thnt the effort of tho past
was not scientific. Rather it is aim
ply a condition of greater roBponsl
hltlHnn and ohltiratlnna in ba mot.
which the nresont day. teeming with 80rtB of "kullduggery was resorted to
now thought and action in all realms, to croat vacancies for tho sheriff's
imposes upon- us. mn to niu Tiie cnolce by the
Our insistent appeal for good and county board or, mon to servo ope-
strong men doos not moan that wo cially on the grand Jury was ob
have not had them in othor times, Jectod to on tho ground that it gave
but what wo moan to stress in this unlimited authority and was subject
call now Is tho neod for tho man to too much abuse. As a consequence
inlsod to thq highest coefficient of tno jgoi aw mado all Jurors look
Mb power, tralnod to produce results allko that ia tQ 8ay( providod for
upon a maximum baalB, whllo BtlU drawinK them from tho same Hats
and out of tho same box whether for
regular panels to fill out vacancies
or for grand Juries.
Perhaps wo aro duo for another
advance in Jury reform, but what
ever may bo done, let us not Jump
conserving his intellectual, moral
and physical resources. Surely, the
dominance ot our varied means of
rapid transit the swltt-tlylng train,
electric street car and automobll
Is no reflection upon tho adequata
utility of the slower locomotion in
tho day of the stage coach, tho early merely from frying pan to fire,
railway train, the bUB or tho car
riage, Our speed would have boeu Tho federal' bank locators freely
an much out of ulaco a few docadca admit tnat tney are stopping in in-
. nn their deliberation today. Our coin for a hearing wholly in compli-
task Is, to gear up the machinery ot mont to aocretary uryan, ana in no
our day to tho pace attained aa the war out or consideration ror i.an
result of momentum gathered from coin's commercial ana rinanciai lm
the succeeding periods of progress, portanco. Banker pilgrims from
and not produced overnight by tho Omaha are welcome to whatever con-
onnlus of any single day. eolation tnis atioras.
--4 t nlW. The tost suit on the quostlon
. b ,A whether ho has a legal right to filo
Senator Root and President fop govorn0p discloses tho fact, Bworn
Strycker of his alma mater, Hamilton to qnder oatb 80 wo aro remindod
college, hit a vory popular cnora in by tho Uncoin Star, that our lleuten
denouncing oxtravagahco among col- ftnt govornor affiliates with tho re
logo students. Tho president goes so imbllcan party Whatever its out
far as to favor expelling an younb come tho flult wm have accomplished
mon who spend moro man uv I ono good purpose
year, whllo anotnor memDor oi mo
faculty says he has ascertamea, mat Tno Bmpi0 truth is, of course, that
JG13 Is ample for tno neeus oi tno neltnor tho police officials, sheriff
average collogo boy. county attorney or newspaper gallery
Whether posslblo to fix a definite actora naa to wait for the Fourteenth
limit to such expenditures, it cer- 8treet murder to find out that dives
tainly 1b not only possible, but ox- wefe oporaUng in Omaha in violation
pedlont to curtail them to tho point pt tne iuw. But now that the horse
ot prudence in the interest ot the lg toien, wm the barn door be
i .!
boy's education ana cnaracjer ueiei- ci08edT
oDiaent. In this very connection, u
is Interesting to noto that, according credit Congressman Stephens at
to a statement of the dean, 70 per ht with the courage to stand up for
cent of tho fraternity rresnmon in hl. own postmastershlp primary re
ono department at tho University ot gardiess ot bulldozing threats. Folks
Chicago- tailed at examinations. There a(jmire a man who believes he Is
Is no longer any question ot tnu ei- , ht perslsta in it, though tney
feet of 'trat" llfo on scnoiarsnip. we thlnk ho la wrong.
have tho word of leading educators
the country over that it is destructive. Serious injury to the home market
Now, tho question arises, as to thoji8 apprehended on the Pacific coast
effect of money extravagance on j a result of the heavy importation
scholarship and the relation between ot egg8 Irom china under the new
it and the frat. Tho chances are the tariff exemption. But it probably
one ia identical and the othpr. intl- wni not tnjuro tho consumers much
mate.
But it gets back to thist that then Careful perusal ot the latest num
problem, especially In the larger in- ber of the Commoner falls to uncover
stltutlons, cannot very well bo solved j ju that critical conso the least sigu
oxcent with the co-operation of tuoi0f dissatisfaction of any act chargea
parents, who put up the money, HI ble to tho administration of President
Is different In smaller colleges, where, Wilson.
thero Is displayed some very fine limbs,
and that la why, we suppose, tho more
aged among tho audlenco occupied tho
front Beats."
Klrby Mlllspaugh, who has been in
Minnesota for somo time Is greeting old
friends in Omaha.
Tho finder of a Sigma Phi pin In the
form of a Greek cross set in pearls and
turquolso with the name "F. A. Wood,
'SV engraved on tho back, will be re
warded for tho return of tho same to
tho law office of John U Webster.
Mrs. U. C. Blako of Cedar Rapids Is
visiting Mrs. George C. Crandall.
Twenty Years Ago
Lorrln A. Thurston, Hawaiian minister
at Wushlngton, passed through Omaha
going cast. Ho expressed firm confidence
In tho provisional government In the
Island and said that If Hawaii became
annexed to tho United States tho basis
of our Insular citizenship would be de
termined by treaty. William Waterhouso
of Cedar Rapids, Ia., brother of Henry
waterhouso of Honolulu, accompanied
Mr. Thurston.
A certain police officer, who felt him
self aggrieved nt comolulnta nt aimrt.
comlngs, was directly charged beforo the
JJoard of Fire and Tolice Commissioners
wun wruing a letter threaten nir tho
Uvea of Mayor Bcmls. Kdwani iin..
water, editor of The Bee. and Chlof nt
1'oiico Seavey and signed "Gultoau E.
rrendorgust." Ho stubbornly denied tho
cnarge.
Samuel Ernost, turnkey at the countv
Jail, gavo several prisoners the best imi
tation of a real rough-and-tumblo fight
they had witnessed in a long time, when
they found htm alona on the Job and
mado a dash for Hbortv.
Ten Years Ago
uno ucatn in New York of Georco
Francis Train excited much local Intorest
and recalled many Interesting remin
iscences surrounding this unique old char
acter, who spent much tlmo in Omaha
during tho early years of his llfo. Both
former Mayor Bemis and H. T. Lemlst.
cousins of Train, and Edward Rose'water!
with whom ho kept up a desultory cor.
respondence. talked with interest of tho
oia uays.
D. O. Clark, head of the Union Pacific
i-oai company, and Miss Margaret Boyd,
dnughter of former Governor Jnmn v.
Boyd, wero married at the home of th
bride's parents, 1908 Davenport street, at
- li. m.
Hugh McCracken and Anna Smith were
jomcu in wedlock by Rev. C. W. Sav
idge.
Fred L. Willis resigned as general sec
retary of tho Young Men's Christian as
oociation to accept a similar position at
Worcester. Mass. A committee of these
five directors was selected to look for
.Mr. wiuis' successor: I, W. Carpenter. J.
n. uumont, ueorge F, Gllmore. T, F.
Sturgess and A. V. Tukcy.
Tho city council employed C, C. Valen
tino to act as official stenographer during
us cessions as a board of review.
John Drew appeared In "The Second In
command" at tho Boyd.
Carroll G. Pcarse, city superintendent
ot schools, finally admitted, after many
denials, that he was a candldato for tho
position of city superintendent In Mil
waukee, which carried a larger Balary.
FACTS AND FANCIES.
What has become of tho old fashioned
girl whose name was MatUda?
At IS a girl Is looking for her ideal. At
2S she Is looking for a man person.
There is nothing a man enjoys so much
as tho feeling that he has been abused.
You probably havo noticed that poor
men are never sued for breach of
promise.
A good deal ot time Is killed In the
expression ot vain regrets that life Is so
short.
George Washington never told a Ho
and he was a poor business man In other
respects.
When a widow Indulges In an unusu
ally long period of mourning for tho de
ceased that is an Indication black is bo
coming to her.
Attending to other people's business
and hard luck aro synonymous terms, Re
cently while Mr. Trylt was out soliciting
funds for tho purpose of providing a
Christmas tree for the children of the
poor, the fellow who held a mortgage on
his tailor Bhop foreclosed It -Phlladelphla
Ledger.
The wlfo of a tango professor in Chi
cago told the court of domestic relations
that hubby mado between JW and $150 a
week teaching the dippy art, and begged
for a piece of tho money. Tho madamo
judge decided to lend a hand by taking
the necessary steps.
Politicians, base ball magnates, the
atrical syndlcaters and a few other vari
eties of tlia population, clad in bathing
suits, indulged In a swimming pool ban
quet In Cincinnati last week, ostensibly
In payment of, nn election, bet; but In
reality to demonstrate Cincinnati's pos
session of hot birds.
Now, wo have tho real 'root- ot the
whoto trouble. Dr. Alonzo E. Taylor,
professor of chemistry of the University
of Pennsylvania, says tho high cost of
living Is caused by women being obliged
to eat more f6od In order to keep their
bodies warm under fewer fashionable
clothes. Can you beat lt
Dealers in tho necessaries of llfo who
might bo troubled with lapses of memory
might paste in tho hats or on the scales
tho warning ot a court that "the pro
prietor of a storo must know that no
falso weights or measures are being used
In his business and In falling to do so
must suffer the penalty." Do you get it?
The new emperor ot Abyssinia, Lldj
Jcaasu, Is just 17, a grandson of Menellk
the Great To give the bearded patriarchs
of thq empire proof of his ability to do
things ho gavo his granddad's standbys
an indefinite vacation In tho short grass
country and placed young bloods at tho
helm, Thero is little prospect of reac
tionaries working the recall In Abyssinia
because Involuntary funerals aro ex
pensive and Inconvenient.
From all sides como lay and cleric de
nunciation of tho tango, with hero and
there a foeblo voice of friendly approval.
Two clergymen, ono in St. Louis and
one in New Jersey, scoff at tho tumult
of moral danger, suggesting nlso the
propriety of seeing the danco before
shouting. Back In tho '70s, when tho
waltz was crowding square dances off
tho floor an Omaha clergyman shook
tho fluted arches ot his church with
thunderlngs against the round dance.
"Why," he exclaimed, "waltzcra whirl
'round and 'round so close together that
a Bllver dollar could not drop between
them to tho floor.." Nevertheless the
waltz remained, all who could took tho
merry whirl, and, strange to relate.
somo of thoso old waltzing sinners are
'otiu waltzing in our midst."
MUFFLED KNOCKS.
Wo nil lovo a good loser when ho
loses to us.
The man who minds his own business
never has a headache the next morning.
Woman Is to blame for most of a man's
troubles. If there were no pretty girls
how could a man flirt?
The world owes you a living. But you'll
havo to peel off your coat and roll up
your sleeves to collect It,
A woman shouldn't go around bragging
about how happy she is with her hus
band when tho walls of her flat aro thin.
Every man Imagines that ho Is tho only
man In the United States who owes
everybody, but ho isn't. Ho has lotB of
company, it his friends would only
fees up.
A rounder can bluff his wife into be
llevlng that ho is too busy to como homo
to dlnnor onco a month. But ho can't
bluff Bright's disease Into belloving that
ne is too healthy to die.
Tho peoplo wlio are clamorlna- for thn
teaching of sex Unowlodgo in tho schools
seom to rorget that old nature has been
attonding to that for tho last mom vMn
and somehow or other made a pretty
gooa jod or it.
When a man Is alone on n. rnM rinv tit.
winter suit and heavy overcoat do not
prevent him from realizing that tho tem
perature is about 2 degrees below, nut
if ho meets a girl who looks good to him
ho can stand on a breezy corner and
snuggle up to her for an hour and Imag
ine that the thermometer has gone up to
102 degrees above. Cincinnati Enquirer.
SECULAR SHOTS AT PULPIT.
Cleveland Plain Dealer: Tho constitu
tion of Maryland provides thnt "no min
ister or preacher of tho gospel shall be
eligible as senator." And now a duly
elected senator who was onco a preacher
has been barred out. Queer old state.
.
iiaryianu.
Baltimore American: A New Jersey rec
tor in giving lils approval to the tango
warns against extreme dips. Whether
his objection to this Incidental of the
dance Is upon mpral grounds there aro.
good and substantial reasons why the dip
Is to be taken with extremo caution and
deliberation, as any tailor can testify.
New York World; With all these cler
ical declarations for and ngolnst the
tango It will soon be as hard for church
people to know whether they are sinning
as it Is for a man who has been through
the American divorce courts onco or twice
to decide In any particular jurisdiction
whether ho Is single, married or a bigamist.
St. Louis Republic: A number of min
isters of the gospel aro opposing a meas
ure to make It nn offense for a person
less than 21 years old to enter a saloon,
upon tho ground that it will increase the
difficulty of convicting saloon keepers of,
violating tho law against soiling liquor
to minors. Do tho reverend gcntlen)en
approve a proceeding" which teaches boys
the dirty business of leading others into
temptation?
PASSING PLEASANTRIES.
"Which do you think are moro Im
portant. Leonldas. tho rights ot property
or tho rights of man7"
"Neither are of any consequence,
Henrietta," replied Mr. Meekton. "coin
pared to the rights of women." Washing
ton Star.
"My husband is going to bring hom
their professor of psychology to dinner,
and I don't know what fish to have."
"If ho Is a psychologist, why not serve
him up some soles?" Baltlmoro Amcri-'
can.
"I'm the victim of financial exagger
ation." "I don't understand you."
"Tho bank has Just informed me that
I've overdrawn my account." Detroit
Frco Press.
He Have you read about this fight over
the Hetch Hctchy?
She No, but I think nil those Immoral
dances ought to be stopped. Boston
Transcript.
Mrs. Subbubs (to tramp) Out of work,
aro you? Then you'ro Just in time. I've
a cord of wood to be cut up and I was
Just going to send for a man to do It.
Tramp That so, muml Where does ho
Hvo? I'll go and get him. Baltimore
American.
"This uplift gets my goat"
"How now7" .
"Tho world is getting too uplifted, went
to a party tho other night. Instead of
playing kissing games they sat around
and discussed ethical questions." Kansas
City Journal.
"Of courso you said that you would
leave public office poorer than when you
entered It."
"Yes. And the opinion neomed to -prevail
that a man as thriftless as all that
didn't deserve office In tho first place."
Washington Star.
"Perhaps you may succeed In being
loved for the enemies you have made."
"Perhaps," replied Senator Sorghum:
"but I Umve noUced that stylo of affection
Is mighty fickle," Indianapolis News.
"Thero la ono thing which always
puzzles mo about tho trouble they call
shingles." '
"What's that?" m ,
"Why they are not In the roof of the
mouth." Baltimore American.
"Gent up. town telephones for an of
ficer at once. Burglar In tho house."
"Let me' 'sec.' said the captain re
flectively. "I've got four men out cen
soring plays, two Inspecting the gowns,
at a society function and two more su
pervising a tango tea. Tell him I can
send him an officer In about two hours."
Louisville Courier-Journal.
THE GOAL OF LIFE.
I
T call H not success
To gain a fortune or
To win renown, unless
In climbing upward thou
Hast left a trail behind
Of happiness for thoso
Along tho way. If greed
Has been thy only aim.
Then thou hast missed tho goal
Of life, while he who treads .
The lowly path and helps
His fellowmen receives
A greater Joy than thou
Canst find in wealth or fame.
GRACE BORENSON,
r - i r i
KM
nr
i i 1 1 1
Song Birds
and Flowers
r
K-l llrttrr Kuvtf
Cleveland Plain Dealer,
If the new federal health chief is right
In his thoory that meat Is tho greatest
germ carrier, the general nuhlln im
rid uf Ua principal source of disease. '
the whole winter through, coupled with a genial
semi-tropical climate, are features in the popularity
New Orleans enjoy as a winter resort, although they
are but Incidental to its many allurements to both the
casual and the long-term visitor. It has its old French and
Spanish sections, teeming with reflections of
A Past Foreign Epoch
of much grandeur, quaint little shops having wares with an
individuality, fascinating architectural types that hold one's
attention, and at every turn examples or evidences of
manners and customs peculiar to the section. It also has its
modem section, in which are portrayed the prosperity and
Beauties of the Modern Days
InrUpa tlal homes mid letting of innt-troplca foliage and fk en. It
parks and Its public IniUtutlont. Then there is ltd budaeu section, with
1U alluring atom la which ware can be purchased not to be found eUewbere
1a the country l also its mercanUle ettabUahmentl, and the external
evidences of iu mighty river traffic. Again, there are its famou
restaurant and Its noted hotel, and, finally, there U It
Famous Carnival Season
ending, for 1014. in Mardt Gra Day, Feb. 34th.
New Oilcan la alto the gateway to the West Indie. Panama and
Central America, with adequate regular steamship service thereto, and.
during the present season, with blah-das Spoclal Wlntar Crulae front thai
port, vUl via United Fruit Co' steamers to Cuba, Jamaica, Cotta Rica and Panama,
Jan. 14th and SSth.Feh. 7th and 25Ut..
See Mardl Gras date la connection with one of these Special Cruise. Send for
bookii "New Orleans f of ta Tourist." "Psoas a for the Tourtrt," and tat the
Illinois Central
"Panama Limited" or "New Orleans SpecUl" from Chicago to New Orlean. leaving
Chi cago at 6-33 p.m. and 9.10 s.m.,asd bt. Loul 11 JO p.m. and IM pu, respccUreh.
IIP
& NORTH, DUtrid Ptutmgt A stmt,
407 WA ISO, Btntt, Omaha, fi'li.