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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 27, 1913)
THJi liEE: OMAHA, SATUKDA, DhAJhMUhAi 27, Will. The omaiia jaiiy bee KOI NDKD HV KDWAltD il'iBK" ATKH- VICTOr. HOSKi ATKlt. KUlTOlt. LBB lU'lLPIXO. 1'Alt.NAM ANU 1TH. ls.ntercvl at Omaha postoiflce ns secoml tlass mutter. - ' TERMS OF sunsemirrioN. Sunday liee, one. year Saturday Uee, one year. Pally Uee, without Sunday, ono year.. J-W 1aI1V Hee, nod Sunday, one year B-w ..... 1M.ML'T1 111 I'AllfllKll. JJver.ing and Sunday Hee. Pr month.. .we Evening, without bunday, per month... Dally liee, Including 8undayjcrino-..SC Polly Bee. without Sunday, nor month. J5o ACdiws all complaints of rregulritlc In deliveries to City Cliculatlun Dept. 11KM1TTANCB. , neji.it by dratt, express or postal order, payaoie to Tho Uee Publishing company. Only 2-ccnt stamps roco.ved In l'"1 of small accounts. Personal checks ex cept on Omaha and eastern exchange. not accepted. OITK1CKS. Omaha-Tho Uee UuUJIng South Omaha-2318 N Btreet .. Council Bluffs H North Main Street. U.ncoln-26 Little Building. ChlcaRO-901 Hearst Uulialng. New York-Boom HOC, ii Fifth Avenue. St Louis-603 New Bank of Commerce. Washlngton-'fl Fourteenth at.. N. w. fommunlcatlons relating to news and editorial matter should be addressed hnaha Bco, Editorial Department. NOVKMB15B CIItCULATlON. 52,068 Slate of Nebraska, County of Douglas, ss,: Dwlght Williams, circulation manager at Tho Bee 1'ubUshlng company, being duly sworn, says that tho averago dally irculatlon for tho month of November, 1913, wan &2.0CS. DWIOllT WILLIAMS, Circulation Manager. Subscribed In my presence und Bworn to before me this Sd dny of December, 1913. JtOHKltT HUNTEH. (Seal) Notary Public. Subscribers lenvlnu tho tlly temporarily should hnve The Bee mailed to them. Address will be elisairs as often n requested. "Love is a disease," says a learned professor. Yes, a universal malady. Why should a self-confessed "re former" havo to be told to put It back? The president is off In a quiet cor ner where tho Carabaos will not got him, With Santa Olaus and tho woathor man in partnership, there are no limits to Christmas' cheer. Wilson's leadership. President Wilson has been criti cised In sonio quarters for heing pedantic, though not strange for one so long a schoolmaster, especially ono who has so completely mastered his own party. It surely will bo ad mitted on every hand by now, by political opponents as well as parti sans, that Woodrow Wilson Is the nctual as well as tho titular head of the regnant democracy. Ills powers cf leadership to that oxtont, at least, want no further demonstration. No cno now wonders Just how far Mr. Bryan will permit the president to go toward exercising tho functions of tho offlco to which ho wan elected. Regardless of tho wisdom or tact of his leadership, President Wilson Is "It" not only in tho White Houso, but also in tho capltol. No ono could havo followed tho deliberations cul minating In tho enactment of our new tariff and currency laws without conceding that. Some of his political oppononta go so far as to call him by tho more austere name of "boss," ah, others oven a "czar." But b whatever namo tho country boa 't demonstrated that as tho party dic tator ho Is strong enough to whin back into lino a recalcitrant senator aftor bolng off the reservation for a whole extra session of nine monthu and mako him voto for tho bill he had been denouncing. I I . r TJ 1 lopKiriQiiacKwan ThisTW in Omani?! cexrutp rsoM tit nu T The Calumet Disaster. What chiefly caused the Calumet slaughter wag not tho false alarm of flro sounded by an Irresponsible fool, but rather what has been responsible for most of such wholesale destruc tion of llfo tho lack of proper means of egress In crises. Had not tho building In which the Christmas exorcises woro hold boon a man trap the scores of little children and tholr parents would not havo perished. It is but another grim reminder of our refusal to learn tho lesson grow ing out of such catastrophes as tho Iroquois theater nnd tho shirt fac tory fires. Theso tragedlos excite dcop pathos, and high resolution at tho time, but our emotions do not Th Carraban may consider itself " .,ons -nousn. as timo dispels duly admonished to remember here- tho SIoom an tuo rUBh of tho cvontB after that it is a wator buffalo. of a fasMleotlnn day crowds in to I nil mo ininu witn oiner thoughts, we A Pennsylvania hen laid an egg forgot and tho precaution against a with a nickel in it, which adds about repetition is loBt Bight of until an one-third to Its original value. other havoc appalls us. So this horror In tho Michigan Tho Express trust Is said to bo city, which haB had tho effect of pleading for mercy, finding all other temporarily allaying factional feel- DECEMIinn 27. Thirty Ycnrs Abo a nunch of big rallwaymcn are In se cret session at Council Bluffs, presum ably with reference to the Iowa pool. Those at the meeting are Marvin Itughlt nd H, C. Wicker of the Northwestern! B. Hall of the Sioux City and Pacific: n. n. Cable, W. N. SaKe, II. flower. II. Hoffman and Thomas V. Woodrow of the Hock Island! R. H. Merrill, J. T. Clark ond A. C. Bird of the Milwaukee! Cap tain U. S. Hayes of the Missouri Pacific, George Olds of the Wabash and S. H. It. Clark of the Union Pacific. The Bur- llngton Is not represented. The mission school Christmas dinner entertained 300 little tots. An Interesting Item from Baltimore tells of the elopement of Gertlo Dotnn, an Omaha girl of 17, sent to school thero by her widowed mother. Her name Is now Mrs. John D. lleynolds ' and she is expected soon to come home to Introduce her husband to her mother. A polo club has been formed at the katlng rink, Two new letters carriers, Messrs. Piatt and Mould, to enter upon tholr duties the first of the year. This will make thirteen carriers in tho city. Tho trustees of Bcllevuo collcgo have elected Hov. L. g. Blayncy of thte city president of the faculty. For tho prize contest for the best lady skater at the roller rink there were four entries, Misses Van Aerman, Dunham, Shlpman and House. Tho prlie, a pair of nickel plated skate", was awarded by vote of tho audience to Ilss House. Twenty Yearn Ago William Gchrman, a drivor for the Hammond Packing cOmtany, was laid with a compound fracture of the houlder, tho result of a collision with street car at Thirteenth and Leaven worth streets. Ho was driving along1, there when the car ran Into his wagon, hurling him from the seat to the ground. Halnh Kitchen, manager of tho Pax- ton hotel, went to Kansas City for a fow days. Bank Examiner C. F. Jicurew camo up from Lincoln on business. Captain J. C. Ayres leit tor nicago. Colonel Alexander Hoagland, the cur few man. came up from wncom. Articles of incorporation of the Prim ers Mutual rumisiwiB l-uihimi.. filed with the county clerk, tho capital stock being SO.00O and tho Incorporators D. W. Merrow, F. M. Dixon, is. cress nd M. K. Bartlctt. Peter Bass and Mary Sass, a, ana -i t1.,m. cam ox oge, respecuvtij, , elves to a belated Christmas gift In the form of a matrimonial conjunction. Amnne those to whom marriage li censes were Icsued wore Loudon 0. Charl ton and Jennctto M. Johnson. tip avenues of possible escapo closed. Tho first question propounded banker applicants for reserve bank boards: How many times did you voto for Bryan? "Our prisons are a, disgrace," says a Now York up-state paper. What, this long after Thomas Mott Os borne's self-imprisonment? inga born of the miners' strike, has I p. natlon-wldo significance ns a fur ther reminder to us ovorywhero to mako suro of tho safety of every building used for public assemblage or to Iioubo large numbers of people likely to bo helpless n ovont of flro or panic. Europe and World Peace. Franco borrowing ?260,000,000 to i,n Not wishing-to rub it in, may wo ' rjr i.rOBra..., uer- meroly suggest that Sancho Villa "l""u l " failed to carvo that Chrlstraaa turkey appropriations J250.000.000 beyond in tho national palnco at Mexico City. Joseph Cullon Root was another distinguished' Nebraskan to nchlovo renown, and many a widow and orphan will rlso up to praise works. The New York Press says thero are 30,000 feeble-minded people In that state. Of courso, It means in the state asylums. tho budget limitation, Russia raising the maximum of its lnnd forces into tho millions, England determined to outrival Oormany In warship strength theso and tho aggressive his plans of Balkan states for a possible early rovlval of Mediterranean hos tllltlcs nro a few straws that show which way tho wind of Europo Is blowing. Thoy aro far moro accu rato as a weathorvane, wo fear, than tho towering turrets of tho bcntlflo Palace of Peace at Tho Hague. Ono cannot honestly sense tho drift of current thought and action on the other side of the wator today wlth- Mr. Dooloy's Idea is for Mr. Bryau to play his Chautauqua lectures on a piccolo ' whllo suspindod from a thrapere." It would at any rato out Innor apprehension that unlvor- give action to nis'woras. Omaha Is not in the. running aa a competitor for one of tho now regloaal banks. Omaha was put horn du combat when our United States senator bolted his party caucus. A Russian physician says excess talking Is dangerous. We offer .our esteemed and loquacious secretary of state as a' virile and vigorous refuta tion. sal peaco and the sweet vision of dls armament is not the whole European program The Fronch government's borrow ing or $260,000,000, while tho United States has Just completed tho expenditure of some $400,000,000 In tho peaceful pursuit of building the Panama canal, suggests a contrast tho significance of which docs not escapo the thoughtful mind. An Omaha man recently returned from Europo a student of affairs, he 1b Out of consideration for tho seua- lola in0 Uee tnat almost the only tor'a editorial name-caller, tho New tnco of popular conversation on York World ought to stop referring tho continent wos "War. war, war,' to Senator Hitchcock as a republican, nd that the people were being for tho list of opIthotB la about ox- burled under a burden of taxation to hausted. rn,s0 rovenuo for naval and military aggrandizement. There is yet time Owing to the pressure of the holt- for us to rest secure In the thought day festivities of tho church, the next and aspiration of peace, but the time round in the bout between tho has evidently not arrived to proclaim preachers and the tango has had to I tho achievement of the banishment be postponed, but return checks will of wnr. be honored, A certain class of papers are burdening Unless John Purrov Mltchel. mayor- their columns witn stories of tho enor- jlect of New York City, is out of matches m0Ua number of men out of employment he may presently set the East river ori al lne Present tim.-A orid-llcrald. flre.-CMcago Dally News. It is the Irony of fate that tho Trust John Purroy to keep well scarehead on the front page of the stocked with matches. same Issue of the paper thus edt . torlal moralizing reads: "Big Mob Tna Cleveland Young Mep'a Chris- 0f Hungry Unemployed Men Riot tlan association Is said to have Los Angeles." started a "father and son" move- ment. Good! Did it got the idea Determined to maintain Its close from Omaha, whose Young Men's rivalry of New York, 8t, Louis Is Christian association has had such a planning to "bring back Broadway movement for several years? I into a fuller communion with the Ufa of the city. Has it been lost in the Mr. Bryan is understood to have Jungles of Elm, Spruce, Walnut, substituted plne-applo Julco fop chestnut. Pine, Locust, Mulberry and prapejuice as his favorite beverldge, so forth? not because of the taste bo much as Trrrrr the color. The deep maroon of tho The man whose cry of "fire" grapejulce was too decoptlve to the blotted out nearly Beventy-flve UtUo eye and as to that which "glveth Its oneB lives in Calumet has left no color in the cup." As a circumspect trace, and may never be found. It man, therefore, Mr. Bryan is deter- Is safe to pay that an avenging con mined to avoid even the appearance science has already found him, and of evil. will never let go. mi Thr Best Friend. OMAHA. Dec. 26.-To the Editor of The Bee: The best friend will not believe a falsehood told on another, and will not believe anything bad unless he knows It Is truo. He never expects anyono to help him at the expense of someone else. He never tempts ono to see If he Is true He never combines with others to avenge fancied or real Insults. He never takes advantage of anyone when ho has the chance. He feels that every good person of all organizations or no organization Is his friend. Ho does not get excited, when wrongfully accused, for he knows good proof Is a friend not worth having, and that those who hate him would not believe the truth anyway. He would like to see every person' on earth have ns square a deal as his personal acquaint ances to whom he Is attached. He does not heeomo offended If his neighbor does not patronize him In preference to some one else, especially If someone else merits the patronago morpthan he docs. Ho Is open and above-oard on all questions. Ho does not Ijellevc In tho double moral standard, and Is not afraid of the frowns of society If he treats a bad woman with the same respect that he treats a bad man. He will not forsake eternal prin ciple for earthly things, and will die on the cross of wood or any other cross be fore he will violate his conscience. What does It profit a man If he gain tho whole world and lose his sense of what Is right? Or how can he be true to anyone, If he Is not true to what truth he understands? WILLIS HUDSPETH In Other Lands Mo-nnnstii of the Vrnr Not a speck of war flecks tho horizon details await an opportuno moment I brought these measures to the threshold ' of law seems likely to be overshadowed by the contest of the forces now lining up against the land reform proposals of tho ministry. Only an outline sketch of the reform has been made public, the in SAID IN FUN. rTAs Vmhm Afl It was given out ly .souiu jnmim v-- .. . Miit.,tl.nir tllfMlt for ers tnui iney mu - tho Ilusslan troops In the far cast, i.uw,- 0.0 pounds of extra mess ncci ocm lately ordered. ' . , Former Senator wiiuain "' Modlson read a paper before the Omaha Philosophical society on "The American Judicial System," In which he advocated terms of fifteen years for all Judges and condemned the present jury ud. He said ho would not abo llsh trial by jury, but woum , " province ot tho jurors po, r.ot accept the Idea that twelve untrained minds that seldom reason consecutively or correctly, constitutes b saier of Judgment than a irawcu .v..... Judge. ,,P1iieit Hev. and Mrs. .wi' ""y ot the Second Presbyterian church left for a week's visit, xn uuv.. V, . be filled in his absence by Bcv. Dr. I at- l8wlft & Co. had about 30) men cutting lee at Cut Off lake, where tho harvest ,a turning oM wen. i.,. a. Heath, accompanied bj Mrs. Heath -topped over in tho city enroute from Louisville, Ky.. the Heath's people, to fsji i'"-. Heath was running tho Tribune. He sa d . nt to figure actively in nex poUUcal campaign, but took oc cession to oasert that na tor n.eant what ho tarn wm- he would not let his namo be used In connect! with the presidential nomlna-tlon. Complains of Ulrtr Streets. OMAHA. Dec. 26.-To the Editor of The Bee: What has become of our vig ilant street cleaning department? Aro the funds exhausted? Something must bo wrong, or the principal thorough fares of the l)ilness section would not bo In such bad condition, not to speak of streets In residential parts of the city. Is thtro sufficient reason why a city of Omaha's typo must havo such dirty streets? j. w. C. Suppression faoes by Fnvor. SOUTH OMAHA. Dec 2LTo tho Editor ot Tho Bee: I may tie told it le none of my business, being a "rank I outsider," but Just the same I'm going to have the satisfaction of asking you folks down thero what has become of that vltuous resolution ot tho lawyers not to havo uny more covering up of papers In divorce and other suits ot public record? I am prompted to ask this by reading of the high society divorce case, which only leaked out twolvo days after It was filed. Did the lawyers mean suppression only whero It was no ol Ject to anybody not to suppress It? Or were they on tho square about It? And did the district clerk suppress this one ot his own accord? If so, why? In tho mronl""iVla It any wonder that I and my brethren aro socialists when wo see such class favoritism? SOCIALIST Editorial Snapshots People and Events ..iwin" John Martin, the oldest resi dent of numford. Me., has been pre v... .h local theater with a coin- V " cntary pass which will 1- good the restores , l'r6f. Dooltttlo ot me ji... !. ti larnrM Will lVtmavlVAU a proaiKio vhov omo to an end In U.OOO.OOO Thta extension of time encourage, the hope that tho Metropoma water board l know where t is at " .... MUhnlland-Bolisevaln. noted t banneVcarrler of New York j-N ?r.gl.t.. after an experience of less than yrar In the business. -. - --- - housekeeping can be aone in - utes." Honest, girls, can you r,A ,a a j Boy. formerly In tho diplomatic service and Instrumental In ' ,. first treatlctf between this country and Japan. Hawaii and other sovernments of the Pacific ocean, died recently at his homo in urccuw.v... " Ho was 0 years old. Them are." ald ord Korvncime. ap proximately 1.700.000 more women tnan in linirland. Scotland and Ireland. If thoy were given tho same irancnise rights as men, they could dominate the empire. No self-respecting man Is going to be dominated by women. A sliver loving cup has been presented to new Edwin A. White ot Olen Ridge, N. J., for having landed the largest land-locked salmon in tho United States during the last year. The fish was caught at the Belgrade lakes, Maine, and weighed fourteen pounds four ounce. It was thirty-one and one-fourth Inches long and had a girth of nineteen Inches. Ed Campbell's ehotcun was discharged near Paralppany, N. J., as h was crawl ing under a fence the other day. Camp bell's left leg was shattered from the knee down. He hobbled a mile to a farm house and cut the leg off with a Jack knife. It was a wooden leg, of course. After half a dnsen years of litigation the will of Robert N. Carson, former Phila delphia financier and railway magnate, has been sustained. Public Interest In this grows out ot the fact that he de- vised an estata estimated at from ti.000, COO to I10.000.0U) foe a school for orphan girls, to be established after the deatn of Mrs. Carson. Cleveland Plain Dealer: Now that the "Slona r.lsa" has been round, we may as well drop back on Charlie Boss. ' St. Louis Globc-Domocrat: By making his contributions to charity nnd educa tlon during his lifetime, William Dcor Ing kneW -that nono.,of them would be consumed In litigation. Brooklyn ltagle: The elder statesmen. In the republican party serve to keep ullve tho memories of Its glorious past at time when the oratory ought to hinge more on Its future. Pittsburgh Dlsptch: Thq Hon. lAlbcrt Jeremiah Bevorldgo "declares that thero Is to be "no amalgamation, .no merger, no connection of any kind with any otln'r party whatever" on tho part of tho progrefslves. This rule will hold firmly until the time comes when Albert Jere miah Wants some outside votes. Baltlmoro American: A Chicago., physi cian fear tbat the age. of eugenics will mark the decline- of' love, and that health and not sentiment will coritrol mnrriago; The pessimistic physician 'may .dismiss his rears. Old Dame Nature haa sur vlved many other fads, and she will bo found managing things long after this one lias passed away. Philadelphia Ledger. The assumption that tho Interstate .Commerce commission, had already made up its mind Ip- reference- to the appeal of . the railroads for pigner rates is not Justified. Tho sit uation Is very lucidly expressed bv th commissioner who said, "If the railroads mane out their ease they will irt ti, Increase, and If they fall to make nut their easo they will not get the increase." Chicago Inter-Ocean: Zanata Is distribut ing a circular addressed to tho residents of the City of Mexico In which he saya he will hang Huerta and Blanquet from tho balconies of tho national palace. The cabinet and captured federal officers will do snot, it would appear to be to the Interest of Huerta to keep Zapata out of i lie cuy. of the old world as the year nears tho finish. This Is n distinct Improvement o-cr the opening of 1913. A year ago fcvery powder house In Europe wos primed for an explosion, and only the desperate efforts ot the powers extinguished tho sputtering fuse, lit by the Balkan war. But while tho signs nnd portents presage peace, there Is no peace for tho tax payers upon whose bent back the burdens of war preparations aro piling up. Statesmen of England and France who In former years predicted that militarism, If persisted In, spelled national bank ruptcy, may point to the record of tho year as assuring fulfillment. Simultan eously tho .great powers have levied In creased tolls for Increased armament Great Britain's budget approached the billion dollar mark, double what It was In 1905, tho major portion of the In crease going Into warships, and the bal ance Into state Insurance and social re form measures. Only tho Gladstonlan tradition eaves the empire from the hu miliation of a big navy loan. Germany devised a toll of JK0.000.000 on the wealth of the country for an increased army. in audition to the regular budget, and Franco has pending n loan of $2GO,000,000 to finance a three-year army system, be. sides tho regular yearly drain Increased ny new tax levies. Austria, nussla nnd Italy are quickening their armament pace. wnuo tne Balkan states, Turkey and China arc hawking their chattels among tno pawnnrokcrs of the world seeking money with which to heal the Wounds of wor or prepare for future wars. The Bnlknn Wnr. The war of the Balkan staten nimlnal Turkey was the most disturbing fnrtor la old world affairs during the year. The armistice agreed upon In December last, extended well Into February, but mo negotiations for peaco were fruit less, Turkey absolutely refusing to sur render Adrlanoplr.. The war proceeds far Into May before tho Turks .-r convinced of the hopelessness of tho struggle. Negotiations for In the treaty of Umdon. hv Turkey relinquished all th trrlrt, conquered by tho allies. Months beforo the treaty was drafted, Austria forbade the allies from invading to Albania. In- "'""8 on making that province an In dependent state. The allies, particularly Montenegro. Ignored Austria's threats, forcing tho latter to call out tho army resorves to enforce Its demand. Tho gainey midget state stuck to Its plans captured Skutarl, and then marched out Its victorious army as the army of tho allied powers marched In, took possession of the city and proclaimed Albania nn independent state. What from tho first promised to be a glorious victory for the cross over the crescent soon turned Into a humiliating and barbarous con clusion. Bulgaria demand,! t-. . .rltory than that which it qucred. The success of the allies was greator than they had anticipated, and the greater area of territory to bo divided provoked wnr among the victors, con vert ng a war Initiated for freedom from Mosten oppression Into one of blatant greed. Bulgaria was the chief offender In this later war, and met effective and humiliating disaster. .Seeing tho victor grappling each othpr's throats. Turkey, tore up the treaty of London, rcoccuplod Adrinnoplc and adjacent territory, and turned crushing defeat Into partial vic tory. Uoumanla on tho north took ad vantage of tho situation to square ac counts Wth Bulgaria, forcing the latter lr!!il",U",h th" ,,"Ptl territory 'of blltetria. By treaties negotiated sep. arotcly by the allies with Turkey, Bill, garia was permitted to retain '.strip of tho conquered territory-extending to tho Aegean sea. Greece, secured by far the larger slice-, of .Moslem .territory, north ward on the . Adriatic and eastward ori tho Aegean sea. Jncludlnc tlio Imnnrinf seaport of Salonlkl. the Island of Crete1 Boerui smaller Islands captured by ?7'.k 8cn'lR na4 south, ward Into Macedonia.' but little Monte negro had to be content with- the Sanjak of Novlpazar and a .trip of luohntalnous country adjacent to Skutarl lake? Much bad blood has been engendered by the war. whlch rrtto little of the essence feature of the outcoipp is the success of Austria In creating th htu, Albania.. ralsjng thereby a barrier against Dllv evasion to the" Adriatic sea. the new year, or tho call for a general election duo a year hence: PATHETIC 3ALLAD. Philander Johnson, In Washington Star. A congressman was singing very sad and oir me gey, He did not seem to think this life a hit, Ho sighed, -"My country doesn't sit up nights to work for me. Though I have often done ns much for it" Then tho administration said, "I'vo worked you overtime. And mavbo 1 shall do likewise again." The congressman Just listened with a patience all sublime And then he answered with this soft refrain: i What have I over done to ou That I should this deserve? Vou'vo left mo feeling awful blue, yar you. have got a nerve! You ought to havo far moro respect For friends of lbng ago. How can my home folks re-elect A man they scarcely know? The congressman first shed a tear and then he shed hi mat. Ho nailed long speeches all nlong the line. llo cned. "Pit do by best with literature to hold tho vote. But If I fail the fault will not be mine, I ought to have been shaking hands, as in tne good old days Before the mlleaec cut In be so few. I'll feel like Blp Van Winkle when on my oia nomo l gate. That's why I sing my sad refrain to you." Travera (phoning tailor) What do you mean by sending a bill with my new suit? I consider It an Insult. Tailor (mcckly)-Vcry sorry, sir. It tho new bookkeepers fault; he evidently got you mixed up with those who pay. Chi cago Post. "Anything being done for the uplift around here? . , "Surely," replied Farmer Comtossel. "Look at the price of eggs." V ashlngton Star. "I shouldn't think there would be any difficulty In renting haunted houses to actors." "Why not?" . . "Because actors like to see the ghost walk." Baltimore American. "I wish that chickens were built like centipedes!" smacked the old gourmand, gnawing a drumstick. "Don't you?" "Great Scott, nol" cried the young man, blushing. "I'm to marry one tomorrow. Judge. " I say, cook, what's the matter with this alleged whipped cream? It's as flat as a pancake." ... . "I can't help It, sir. I'm too dellcata to whip cream." "Indeed? Then beat It!" Baltlmor American. "Willie," said the teacher, "what ahap Is the earth?" "It Is an oblate spheroid." "And what kind of shapo Is that?" "I asked father and he said ho guessed it was a scientific way of saying tlio world Is In mighty bad shapo at present." Washington Star. "My dear, I told you that guest I brought home to dinner was a very baohful man." "I know, but what of It?" "Nothing, only you did go and put your foot in It, when you had sheeps head fish for dinner." Louisville Courier-Journal. Count the cost and you'll buy a Ford. Big production centered on one model keeps its first cost lowest. Light weight and unequaled strength make its unkeep most economical. If you count the cost you'll buy a Ford. Five hundred dollars is tne new price of tho Ford runabout; the touring car is five fifty; the town car seven fifty f. o. b. Detroit, complete with equipment. Oet catalog and particulars from Ford Motor Company, 1916 Harney St., Omaha, or direct from Detroit factory. Muffled Knocks A soft answer saves you many a hard wallop. A man shouldn't try to tell the truth all tl.e time unless he la a champion fighter or a champion runner. ' A single man can hardly wait for Pay day to come around. But It doesn't mean anythtng to a married man. A girl can have a father and three brothers at home and still Imagine that her fiancee has wings and a halo. A nan might appreclata the compli ment. But you shouldn't, tell s. stout girt that she Is all wool and a yard wide. There ar mighty few men who can pay you a Just debt without acting as though they were doing you an awful favor. The old-fashioned woman who used to wear three petticoats now has a daugh ter who wears a pair of tights and u silt skirt. Marrying our opposltes doesn't mean that a beardless youth should hook up with a girl who has a falr-to-mlddllng mustache. It Is certainly a lot of comfort to an old maid to remember that Naomi, the daughter of Enoch, was (SO years old when she married. Clothes may not make the man. But somehow or other wo never associate fellow with prosperity If the seat of his pants looks like a mirror. The old-fashioned man who used to patronise the "BIJo" racket store and said the trains came in at the "doppo usually had money enough to send his sons to college. Cincinnati Enquirer. A Vanished itrunlillc. " N The transition of Chlnn f, He to a dictatorship s . VS, though not a surprising, development of the year. Shadows of coming ovents were observed early In the year when Provisional Pres. Idcnt Mian Shlh Kal concluded n,rnti- ons for a loan from the powers despite tho protests of a malorltv nf th r-i... s Parliament With ready m'on.v . appeaso tho army and for distribution where It would do tho most good, Presl dent Yuan proceeded with the execution of his plans. Parliament ,was allowed .to Play with lawmaking. Three- obnoxious leaders of the liberal clement wore put out of the way. Army officers of doubt ful loyalty were sent with expeditions to Mongolia and Tibet. Discontent in the southern provinces developed into open reunion in .May, nut waa crushed in a few weeks, and the leaders and oirtir- drlvcn Into exile or executed. With the rebellious elements disposed of a. parlia mentary election was held, result I mr m two-third majority for Yuan. The-lat. ter's election as president for a term of I five yearn followed In duo course. Prog-! ress toward a dictatorship moved rapiny after President Yuan's installation. One hundred members of Parliament who on. posed the president's policies were dls- missed. Later on Parliament was pro rogued and practically abolished. The latest reports from Peking foreshadow the appointment of an executive council which will approve the plans and poli cies of the president. In less than twenty months since the abolition of the Manchu dynasty the chief servitor ot exiled roy alty has become the master mind and manager of the empire. ProgreiM In Orcnt Britain, Progress toward broader popular gov ernment mark the year in Great Britain. Three great measures proposing vital changes In tho existing order were ad vanoed through the second stage, despite the opposition of the House of Lords, and ure scheduled for enactment Into law at the coming session ot Parliament. These measures aro the establishment ot an Irish Parliament In Dublin, disestablish ment of the Welsh church, and the abo lltlou of plural voting. Oppotitlou to a parliament in Dublin arsumed a threat ening phase In t'Uter, but the readiness of the government to allay Imaginary i feara by compromise clears the road to ! homo rule Tho mighty struggle wider i WINTER TRIPS TO (Florida, the Gulf Coast and Cuba NOW Is the time for planning a visit to tho Sunny South. Favorable round trip excursion tickets on sale dally to all Im portant winter resorts. 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