2-0
THE (BtAHA SUNDAY BEE: DECEMBER 21, 1913.
The Omaha Sukpay Bee.
FOUNDED BV KDWAHD nOSEWATBIl
VICTOR ROSEWATBR, EDITOR.
BKS BIT1LJ3INO, FARNAM AND 17TII.
Entered at Omaha postofflce aa second
daaa matter.
TERM 8 OP SUBSCRIPTION.
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Address all complaint of Irregularities
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REMITTANCE. . ,
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Only S-cent stamp received In payment
of small accounts. Personal checks, ex
cept on Omaha and eastern exchange, not
accepted.
Lincoln- Little building.
Chicago Wl Hearst bulldlne.
New York-Room 1105, 188 Fifth avenue.
St. Louts 503 New Bank of Commerce.
"Washington 73 Fourteenth 8U, N.
CORRESPONDENCE.
Communltatlons relating to news and
editorial matter, should be addressed
Omaha Bee, Editorial department.
NOVEMBER SUNDAY CIRCULATION
43,353
State of Nebraska. County of DourIm. n.
Dwlght Williams, circulation mahager
of The Bee Publishing- company, being
duly sworn, says that the average Bun
day circulation for the month of October,
day circulation for the month pf Novem
ber. WIS, was 4S.KJ. DW1CJHT W1L
LIAiia Circulation Manager.
Subscribed In my presence and sworn
to before me this 8d day of December,
191X ROBERT HUNTEIl,
NoUry rublie,
.Sabacrlbera leaving; the oily ttm
pmrllr altoald have The Bee mailed
in them. Aadrese 111 be chanced
aa often iqtieste.
No, tho Carabao and tho mooso
are not exactly alike.
Tw -Hocker we Wave always with
ub. It Is tho booster eneed.
Thanks for the lew ikkeav: or
flurries, m the weather man calls
them. '
Remember, that it is not the cost
oi the gift so much as the 'spirit of
tho giver.
Mrs. Pankhurst eocmn to-havo es
tablished regular office hours for
being arrested.
Never mind, they have guaranteed
120,600 for Rev. "Billy"' Sunday to
pick up In Omaha and walk away
with.
The telephone and telegraph com
b)natlea la to he uomerged. Now,
We shall see whether It Is possible
tfc unecramble eggs.
Beth eur Nebraska senators voted
fpr the CHrreacy bill on its final pas,
sage, ee that no eae eaa make this
an keue between ihesa.
Nteeteesi acres of Leadoa land re
cently seta fer $60,000,000, but It
probably weuld net touch this good
old Nebr4s soil for fertility.
General Villa will have to stop
lively it he expects yot to redeem
tpat promleo to himself to cat his
3hrattaHs dinner In Mexico City.
I Oswkt hw a model match ordl-
3as.ee sew. It refers te the kind
ou strike fer a spark, set the eu
tiesle variety where the spark comes
fjrsi.
J The average AaaerfcM U, sail to
rzx seats rleher tea ay tha,he was
year see. The differs Rcejs just
went ise swra oi resources wita
The I, M. P. K. society, la ether
vor-s, the Society fer Suppressing
PrsptocaeuB Kissing, limits Us
issshesshlp we take it, to the still
JtUsaMe. , -
A Massachusetts kaa has beon
made governor of Hawaii Just to
prove how sincerely democrats be
lieve la home rule, and the doctrine
of coaseat pt the governod.
Note, however, how careful our
democratic Insurgent senator was
not.to wander sq fer from base that
he could -not grab the bag Wore he
ball coujd, bef giuo'd to him for a put-
out.
Among other expense items that
contribute to the high cost of our
public schools is the steadily length
enlng teachers' pension roll. But
no one Is demanding retrenchment
there.
When a senator condemns a thing
on principle and then votes for It for
party's sake on the ground that It
is only 40 per cent bad, is he voting
for a principle? Don't ell answer
at once.
Every succeed lag xlasue of Mr.
Bryan's Commoner demonstrates
anew that its editor and proprietor
is completely satisfied with the ad
ministration which President Wilson
is giving the country.
A Pennsylvania astronomer says
the world may bold out for 15,000,-
000 years longer, which makes all
the more interesting the assevera
tion of another savant that we shall
all be crazy in 300 years.
Agriculture department approprl
anions for the coming year aggre
gate 126,000.000, And it Is not so
isng since all the agricultural aetlv
J ties of the government were ban
djed by a little obscure bureau as a
side isvus to another department.
The Nobel Prize.
Tho awarding of tho Nobel peace
prize for 1913 to Senator Root for
nctual achievement during tho
period 1905-1908 leads to the usual
confused discussion of tho Nobel
prlzo system as contemplating
merely world peace enterprise, when
as n matter of fact tho original In
tent was to endow tho leaders In five
domains. This provision was made
by tho lato Bernard Nobel, the
Scandinavian manufacturer of dyna
mite, In his last will and testament,
sotting asldo tho internet accruing
from certain Investments Into five
equal amounts for the awarding of
prizes for the most Important dis
covery or Invention In physics, dis
covery or Improvement in chemistry,
dlscovory in physiology or modicine,
tho production In tho "field of liter
ature the most distinguished work
of an Idealist tendency," and finally
for tho boat promotion of "tho fra
ternity of nations and the abolition
or diminution of standing armies
and the formation and lncrcaso of
peaco congresses."
Most has been raado of tho peaco
prize and least of the literary pro
duction of an "Ideal tendency." Yet
not many prizes for world poaco ac
tivities havo boon awarded, nono for
tho last year, which has boen rathor
"unfruitful In such achievements.
For a tlrao following tho cessation
of hostilities between Russia and
Japan for assisting In which Theo
dora RoosoVelt gained a Nobel prlzo
tho world peaco propaganda flour
ished as novor boforo nor since, and
The Haguo was magnified every
where among civilized powers as the
reservoir of this stream of amity
touching tho shores of many nations.
Now, hardly has tho splondld Palaco
of- Peace boon 'completed than this
tido scorns to havo receded and rul
ers gravely stop to cavil over tho
tangible lnfluonco of Tho Haguo,
Men now speak of tho ovanescont
character of world poaco much mora
than they extol tho virtues of tho
Carnegio poaco foundation and tho
Rockefeller plan of exterminating
war, whllo talk of disarmament Is
cdmplotoly drowned out In the clash
and confusion abroad.
It may not bo altogether ploasant
to contemplate theso things, but If
it loads to, a new awakening of tho
real, based upon more tanglblo
Idoas, so much tho hotter. Wo have
yet to await the results of tho Bryan
probationary peace treuty plan. Per
haps they shall evolve occasion for
the next award.
Peace on the Panama.
Evoryono breathes easy, now that
wo knpw from Cplonol Goethals,
himself, all la well betweon Jilm and
Qorornor Metcalfe. Wo may again
Ho down to our dreams secure in tho
bosom of thlo consolation, that tho
hoads of our military and civil gov
ernments aro ono. and united out on
tho sun-klsaod frontier of our'othcr-
wlso unfortified domain. It was
enough to make any American feel
a bit squeamish to think of a gaping
broach betweon those two strong
arms of the government in the canal
sone.
But those i of us who know tho in
nate disposition of tho peoco-lovlng
author of 'Little Bishop Sunbeams"
(ho charge for tho ad, Mot), and
that; though . domocrat of tho dem
ocrats, Bweh'of his training had
been In the school of that pebrless
"prlaceof .peace," knew thoro must
be something "wrong with the reports
that-told. ofvawar between tho gov-
ernor-aau. coionei. Posltlvo con-
flrmatldn of 'the placid state of af
fairs wJU.bo.more than welcome news
to many Nebraskana, who are psxk
lngj,thelr grips for a Jaunt jUong the
Panama with the expectation or put
ting up at the Metcalfe houBo, whore
iney understand the latchstrlng)
nangs out day, and night, within easy
roach and, without standing on tip
toes. "
A Working Church.
.Dr John Timothy Stone, pastor of
one of the largost churches in, Chi
cago and tho country and at present
official head of one of tho foremost
Protestant denominations, reproving
the people of his city for being too
slow to respond to the call of worthy
cnaruy, says:
Bomeone has said that all we need to
give an Impulse to the ..work pf .bharlty
Is a terrible snowstorm or some calamity.
It Is a criticism of our spiritual intelli
gence that we must wait for such a re
minder. It ts an evidence that nooses-
storm are one of the sources qf our tempr.
lauons. lemptauon comes not alone to
the poor and the sad of heart,' but to the
prosperous and successful There la dan
ger lest your possessions should' possess
you.
The church, above, al' public
agencies for good, must beon Its.
guard against such temptations. To.
ward them off, Dr. Stpne and his
parishioners, who seem to be doing
a good deal for worthy charity, while
also holding out a helpful hand to
others needing It, though not ob
jects of charity, are Just completing
a new church home costing $650,000,
so situated as to be accessible to
thoso they expect to sorrel It 'is to
be a modern Institutional, working
church. Says the pastor;
AVe are making special preparation to
meet the needs of the Voung men and
women who are earning their way In'
Chicago, many of whom havi no fadllClts
for comfortable baths, for reading, writ
ing or for social enjoyment under safe
surround'ngs. We are providing In the
I church for athletics, the teaching' of do'
mestlo science, millinery and typewriting,
and for all of the enjoyments of club life
conducted under Christian auspices. We
aim to minister to the life of the city
without reference to the denominational
affiliations of those who need us.
A pretty good program, which
ought to arrest the attention of thoso
churches racing for the comfortable
isolation of residential districts, far
from the madding strife of tho
crowd, of tho "man In tho stroot."
It would not do them much good to
build for institutional work, for they
have gone away from thoso who most
need that sort of ministration. There
is need for churches In tho beautiful
sections of cities, but a tremendous
need and opportunity for them else
whero, down In tho highways and
hedges, whero men aro waiting to
be helped. x
A Strictly Party Measure.
As confidently predicted, despite
assurances that It would bo consid
ered and acted upon as a nonpartisan
measure, the currency bill has been
propelled through the senate by the
solo forco of tho democratic caucus
machinery. On the final roll call
evory ono of the democrats In tho sen
ate recorded his vote to protect his
claim to party regularity, and tho
half dozen republicans and lone pro
gressive joining them presumably did
so to indicate that they bellevo tho
now curroncy bill an improvement
notwithstanding its shortcomings.
The currency bill, therefore, has run
tho gauntlet of tho sonata as much as
n party measure aa it did that of the
house. It goes now to tho confer
ence committee, which may bo relied
on not only to expedite Its proceed
Ings, but also to put on tho finishing
touches precisely as the man .In tho
"Whlto House wants them. Tho act,
will bo known as tho Glass-Owen law,
but it will havo tho party trademark
all ovor it, and owe Its being to the
guaranty of Prosldent Wilson on tho
labol.
Companionship of looks.
Oh for a book and a shadla nooke,
Eyther ln-a-doore or out;
Withe the scene leaves whispering over
bade.
Or the streete cryes alt about
Where I male reade all at my ease.
Both of the news and olde;
For a jolllo goode book' whereon to
looks,
Is better to me than golds.
Old English Bong.
Next to tho possession of genuine,
living, personnl friends, what Is
more valuable and precious than the
companionship of good books? And
there Is- that In the book which oven
the personal friend cairtiot give, tho
Joy of knowing about other men and
other times', without which any life
1b impoverished A debt, then, those
who read good books owe them, a
debt such as a pupil owes his master,
us described by an old English
writer some centuries ago.
These are the masters who Instruct us
without rods or ferrules, without hard
words and anger, without clothes or
money. -If you approach them,,, they are
not asleep; If Investigating -you' Interro
gate them, they conceal nothing; if you
mistaxe mem tney never gruntuie; ic you
are Ignorant, they cannot laugh at you.
But this companionship of books,
covotous as It Is, Involves its perils.
Noxt to tho companipnehlp stands the
choice. "Evil communications cor
rupt good, manners" through inani
mate pages as well as through the
wrong kind of personal friends.
None too much care and discrimi
nation may be exercised in the se
lection of one's reading! A thing
bo powerful, so- potentially valuable
to one's upbuilding and 'well-being,
must, of course, possess tho possibil
ity of harm. And in this day with
lltorary grist-mjUs. grinding but tons
ot books selling wholesale by .the
box or hundred, the task of selection
bocomea imperative. It surely
cannot bo truthfully said that Wa
are not as much of a reading people.
today as we used to be, for tho niltls
of commerce would not continue to
turn out their wares If thoy did not
soil, and selling thoy must be read.
Just whether that is to bo taken
as a sourco of gratification or not
Is open to question, In view of the
character of some of the books.
Another contusing thing is that, as
i i- . .
uuuas were aear wnen tney wore
rare, so now in their multiplicity.
they are cheap and within the reach
or ail. This, of course. Is a fine
thing for a good book, but also
widens tho harmful influence of tho
bad or trashy book.
Advioe to Guileless Qirls.
Unsophisticated maidens migrat
ing from the country or Small towns
to the city will do well to heed the
auvico of the assistant state laboT
commissioner ot Missouri tas con
tained in this little tabulation:
It-youmust come, don't ask ahy
stranger for information. '
Kind a policeman, go to a Police sta
tion 'for information or, go to the Young
women's woniuan association or some
place that is known to yoU.
jiave money enougn tor at least a
month.
Keep your money n your stocking: It
is saier man a purse.
Beware of tho stranger who offers to
guide you or carry your grip. Maybe
he hAs horns under his hat.
Have acme relative meet you If possi
ble.
do back, to the country as koon as you
can.
In a word, girls, exercise, common
sense. Do not ( make targets ot
yourself 'simply because you are
amtd new -surroundings and possible
peril. The city is generally a safe
place for tho girl with grit and
gumption, but unsafe for the one
who makes herself an easy prey for
evory subtlety besetting her path.
Pitfalls for unwary, guileless girls
are most numerous where there ore
moro peoplo than elsewhere, but
provisions are also made In these
very places to protect : them, arid
young women havo but to avail
themselves of these means of safety.
Thoy can como vory close to it by
following such advice as tho above,
without acting upon the last clause
of tho counsel.
Supremacy of the Canary.
The supremacy of tho canary as
a song bird for the houso stands out
strong In the figures of feathered
Importations Into this country; Ac
cording to tho annual report of tho
chief of the biological survey, tho
total number of birds brought hero
from abroad last year was 477,364,
of which nearly 400,000 wofo. ca
narlosv Not oven a rash guess would
glvo an' idea ot tho number of theso
little songsters bred annually' hero,
or tho total number . whoso sweet
Garbling Is a constant delight to
millions of our people.
In this connection It may be ot in
terest to roclto what tho natural his
tories tell us about the canary In Its
native and wild state. The wild
canary has dark brown plumage,
and is oven smailor than tho canary
wo know, which la tho product of
domestication nnd cross-breeding for
a poriod of some 380 years since
thoir introduction into Europe from
tho Islands that boar tho uamo nomo.
In Germany, Italy and tho Tyrol tho
business ' of brooding canary birds
for commorclal purposes has grown
to enormous proportions, and tho
United States is one of tho coveted,
markets,, as may well bo soon in the
importation figures wo have quoted.
That a song bird adds much to
"the hominees' ot tho home needs
no arguing, and the very - fact that
the" canary, as an inimitable singer,
beautiful to tho sight and easy to
caro for, 1b tho proforrod of birds
for' this purposo, almost without
competition, is tho hlghest tribute to
its enchanting power.
Abolishing the Vice Presidency.
Comes now tho Kansas .City .Star
with a proposal to amend the con
stitution so 'as to abolish the vice
presidency, saying:
It Is not only useless, it la dangerous.
Only on the rarest occasions la a vice
president chosen who la fitted for tho
presidency. It has been tho custom to
reward a defeated faction in tho party
by permitting it to rnuno tho socond man
on the ticket. The candidate la not se
lected with a view to his possible eleva
tion to be president. Thoro is constantly
danger that tho death of a president may
put, in his place j man wholly unfitted
for the posltio)i, who would never' in the
world be elected to tho office.
wmie tnero Is a kernol of truth
In what tho .Star says as to tho selec
tion ot men for tho second, place on
the ticket, how are wo to improve
on tho .present method 7 By lotting
the succession descend through tho
cabinet, is the suggestion, which is
the order now past tho vice presi
dency. Hut whether that would se
cure hotter results may be open to
question. Are all cabinet officers
selected-wlth-a. vlow to-thelr-fltnesa
for the presidency? If the results
ot throe presidential elections fur
nish any criterion, as,' to popular
Judgment, we may woll vosk our
solvea this very question wlth'rofor
once to tho ranking member In tho'
present 'cabinet, to Bay nolHlng of
the others In line, now and hereto
fore. "
How the contingent fee gamo
works la again Illustrated by the suit
reported from Lincoln In which
Omaha lawyers seek judgment for
thoir 60 per cent partnership Inter
est In a personal injury case. It
seems the suit demanded (10,000
damages, but was settled by the
plaintiff for (325, under which con
dition, it goes without saying, any
lawyer would have Just claim for
disappointed hopes.
To a man up a tree' tho scrap be
tween tho doctors and tho preachers
ovor tho Wisconsin . eugenic mar
riage law looks like a fight for the
big end ot the fees. The doctors
have no business to reach Into the
preaehers' preserves, anyway, and If
thoy are not careful a solution will
bo ound by creating a state medical
examiner's Job issuing health cer
tificates free.
Tho city authorities find it diffi
cult to draw the lino between li
censes to Bell liquor at wholesale
and to sell at retail. ThlB is a poor
way of distinction, anyway. The
lino should be drawn, as it is in the
proposed new charter, between
places which sell and places which
do not sell, for consumption on the
premises.
Colonel Dry an crtlclses Colonel
Roosevelt for furnishing the home
newspapers with full and complote
copies of the speeches he 1b making
In' South America. This complaint
Is In the nature of remarks formerly
made about stolen clothing.
Some of the preachers think the
pmaha City mission should refuse to
take money gathered in for It by
means of a charity ball. My," but
it's lucky that no one thought of
staging the big dance to help pay off
a church debt
lookinjd Backward'
t , Jhis)ay in Omaha
co-rozD rsoM sit nits
T
DECEMBER 21.
Thirty Years Aro
rne umana aermari club gave a dance
In the spacious dining room at the Mil
lard, with twenty-elgu.1 couples attend
ing, aa follows: Messrs. Morris, Pater
son, N. Harkalow. J. T. Clarke, Dundy,
Dickey, Saunders, N. Crary, W, Crary,
At S. Patrick,, E. P. Peck, Beach, Rem
ington. Davis, Klrkendall, Wood, Wells,
Berlin, Boss, Deuel, Brock, Oarllcha, Mc
Millan, ' Thayer, and Misses Berlin,
Bishop, Dora Lehmer, N. Lehmer, Bar
ton, Tompkins, McCormick, Lake, Ileth,
Richardson, Doane, Balcombe, Chambers,
Becd, Maunders, Smith of 8U Joseph,
Boyd, and Mesdames E. P. Heed, Davis,
Klrkendall, Ben Wood, E. V. Barkalow
and Dundy.
Articles of IncorporaUon are also filed
for the Cuming Street Railway company
by A. J. Poppleton, 8. D. Mercer, J. D.
Furey, John L McCaguo arid George P.
Bcmls.
Faculty and students of tho Omaha
Medical college-nJoytd art oyster supper
at Wirth'a last night, Those present
wore Drs. Denlse, Glbbs. Moore, Carter,
Brown and Search, and Students Rtck
etts, Roe, sWlrth, Youugman, ' Knowles,
Webb, Dolby, Redman, Welse, Living
stone, Watson and Daniels.
The Home Circle club gave a pleasant
danco at Masonlo hall. Its third party of
the season. William II. Nelson fa presi
dent and F. W. Pickens secretary. Tho
reception committee Included J. II. White,
W. -II. Latey, ,W. Copley, T. E Bailey
and William Nelson,, and the- floor com
mittee F, W. Pickens, William Brown,
Qeorgo Bailey, T. F, Redman and J. N.
Ilerisman.
Another $5,000,000 corporation, tho Ogal-
alla Land and Cattle' company, has been
formed with these incorporators: W. A.
Poxton. P. E. Iter, J. M. Woolworth and
John II. Donnelly ot Omaha, M. C. Keith
of North Platte, Alec Swan and Zacha-
rlah Thomaon tof Cheyenne, C li. Rider
of New York, Joseph Frank of Chicago
and. George Shldley of Kansas City.,
Twenty Years Ago
, Forefathers' day was celebrated by the
Congregational club at" the First Con
gregational church, with W. II. Alex
ander, president ot .the club, as toast
master, and theso SDeakers: Dr. J. T.
.Duryea, Rev. Gregory J, Powell, Rev, B.
Wright Butler, Rev. Dr. Thaln, while
"Mrs. Kato R. Halna worth read an orig
inal poem.
It became clearly evident on the aur.
face of things that the Commercial club
and Count IUblenskl wnntd nnl atnto., nn
the, terms for establishing the beet sugar
ractory, which the count had proposed,
and that If they got together at all It
would tx on very much different grounds.
Receiver E. Ellery Anderson of the
Union- Pacific and General Manager Dick
inson, Superintendent of Motive Power
McConneUy Chtef " TSriglneer" Pegram and
tho veteran superintendent of the Ne
braska division. P. J. Nichols, returned
from Denver, where olasa for th r.
organization of the Union Pacific, Den
ver & Gulf road, an adjunct of the
Xmlon Pacific, were pending.
A . Christmas musicals waa riven at
-Bruwnell hall in the evening by the
young women students under the direc
tion of Miss Wallace and Mrs. Cotton.
Dan Farrell gave a quantity of molasses
and sugar for the winter supply at the
Rescue homej which, under Rev. A. W.
Clark's management, was gathering In
bounties for the poor.
Ten Years Ajfo
Poundmaster McLaughland put up to
the city council a proDosltlan. which it
rejected, of converting the dog pound Into
a sort or. navea of retug-e for homeless,
friendless and otherwise downtrodden
dogs during the winter, working In con
Junction with the Humane society,
li. D. Richards of Fremont, who was in
the city, Bald It was hardly time as yet
to Jubilate over tha completion of the
Fremont Power conal, In which he was
personally Interested. The canal, he said,
was not built and would not be until a
few financial kinks were straightened
out
Secretary Koentg of tho Howell Water
board returned from Cherokee, la., where
he spent several weeks Installing sewer
main extensions.
The Board of Education held Us con
cluding session for the year. President
Johnson and other members Indulged In
much sweet talk about the prevailing
"harmony," but one UUe not of discord
was sounded when II. H. Baldrige. as
attorney for John McDonald, architect,
presented formal demand for an, archi
tect fee of $10,000, Judgment for which
the supreme court of the state had af
firmed. Mr. Baldrige intimated that un
less the board evinced some Intention, to
come across with the coin, he would
apply to the bond company as surety
for the board for the amount with trim
mings. Why JTotf
Loulsvllle Courier-Journal. -Now
that Sao Francisco has grafted
hte Hetch Hetchy valley for a water sup.
ply, shouldn't congess be asked to run
a pipe line from Milwaukee to furnish
San Francisco with free beer?
Barkis la Wllllns;.
Brooklyn Eagle.
Railroad presidents are not averse to
government ownership. There has never
been a case reported where property was
sold to the government at a losing
price.
Sport's Toll of Life,
Indianapolis News.
Seventeen perrons and about 10,000 deer
were killed In Maine during the hunting
season just closed, and this seems to
be a moderate ratio for that kind of
sport
People and Events
If you would get what you want, buy
it and hang It on the Christmas tree.
Better be sure In the evening than sore
next morning.
A discarded husband In NVw Vnrk
enjoys an alimony allowance of KO a
weea. The papers refuse to print his
name, fearing publicity might project
him Int? the hall of fame.
Omaha and Its neighbors do not mono
polite the mild winter smiles 0f the
weather clerk. Boston rises to remark
that oranges and bananas were picked
right on Washington, street, last Wednes
day.
An extended diagnosis of the Wlscon-
sin eugenic law shows that tho allopathic
nervo requires fj a treatment to' Insure
a health certificate. The law .'designates
a $3 treatment, but tho doctors, found
that tho doso would stretch llttlo more
than one leg.
The Omaha spirit ts about to tone up
family relations In Clovqland. The Young
Men'a Christian association of the OMo
metropolis, taking its cue from the
Omaha Commercial club, has decided to
pull off a feast for fathers and sons, to
get them better acquainted,, and glvo old
man. and kid a new angle view of each
other In a crowd.
If one must a-"bu'rglfng go, go to it
in the Connecticut style. A pair ot
aristocratic houso crackers called with an
automobile; at a residence in Greenwich,
entdred the front door carrying dress
suit cases, illuminated the Interior so
that neighbors thought a reception waa
on, gathered up $1,000 worth or goods,
noisily said "good night" at the door nnd
drove away.
The esteemed King Menellk, the Hon
of Abynalnla, Is reported dead for 'the
'stenth time. No other descendant of
Solomon has enjoyed such a copious
stream of obituary publicity. It looks oa
though the Abyssinian clipping bureau
works tho death report for the purpose
of coddling the old man's egp. But
newspaper morgues havo boen fooled too
often, and the gamo is off.
SECULAR SHOTS AT PULPIT.
Philadelphia Ledger: The most Impres
slvo fact In the world today ,1s the
annual distribution of 2S,00O,0pQ copies ot
the Bible,
St Louis Globe-Democrat Rov. Mr.
Kellcy. of Cincinnati is an orgi'nal and
daring experimenter." Ho Is providing
free lunch in his church from T.30 to
8:30 every night his purpose being to
attract men who can not be .Induced to
come to church In any other way. The
boldness ot hut plan Is not In providing
of a feed wlth'a talk, It Is In having the
feed preccdo tho talk, In tho order of
exercises.
Sloux City Journal: Fortunately for the'
.w,etfaro of Boclety the Catholic church Is
charged with a good many things that
are "not so. A statement made recently
by Cardinal Gibbons in a sermon at
Baltimore may servo to ease the minds
of some timid people. "I do not wish to
see the day," tho cardinal said, "when
the church will Invoke and seek govern
ment aid to build our churches or
subsidize our clergy. For then tho civil
rulers might dictate the doctrines we
are to preach." The cardinal referred
to tho "happy condition now existing
among us" and, hoped it might "always
continue."
"Springfield Republican: A mild biblical
controversy has been started In England
by the declaration of the archeologlst
Dr. Handcock, lecturing at tho British
museum, that the walls of Jericho were
not so completely destroyed as la sug
gested in the book ot Jonhua, which
states that they "fell down flat." He
has ot course been accused ot Impugn
ing the veracity of the Bible and Is crit
icized with special severity by those
who had decided from the narrative that
the wall must have sunk bodily till the
top waa level with the ground, for other
wise Rahab and her house on the wall
would have fared badly. Much laborious
thought has been expended on this pas
sage, rationalists having held, for ex
ample, that the trumpets sounded the
keynote ot the walls so that they were
destroyed by "sympathetic." vibrations'.
f.T T Tim r 2-t y I ra-r5 rr
both on land and sea, is the haven where one escapes the T.
seventy of Northern winters, enioya absolute rest and is L
broadened and amused by novel sights and unhackneyed I
experiences. Prove it for vourselfl Take some nno f"i,- I
1014 high-grade
Special Winter Cruises
from New Orleans to
Cuba, Jamaica, Costa Rica,
Panama Canal
Jan. 14, t Jan. 24, Jan. 28, Feb. 7.
tFeb. 12, Feb. 25, fFeb. 28, f Mar. 17
Ships ol the Udted Fruit Co'i "Great White Fleet," with crul. to rvin.'
Panama, and return via Boca. Panama, tolni via lUvaaaVCuhV t
, tS-SV'FuerU BUmarck" and "Kronprlaiesrin Ce ot the W-Am-rV, -utoew"oMW0D'
iUaaXa' Sn' -. lUS
. These are the only cruises to the West Indies and Panama that
give one the opportunity to see 1
New Orleans En Route
New Orleans so dearly beloved as a city to visit by a wide
range of temperaments, from the serious antiquarian and histo
rian to the ton vwwnl and the idly curious sight-seer. Thecitv
with a wider range of interesting individual characterutfesthan
any other aty m the Union. The city of balmy air and
25th t'J? Mrt,NS "T '"Htely following this date
25th and 28th. . Send for literature on Panama and on
New Orleans. Direct and best route to New Orleans the
Illinois Central
"Paaima limited" leaves Chlcaxo 6.SJ n.m ; n n
urMn No OiWn. th. nut ercniai and next (oir'
407 8ih letk Stmt, OrtuXa, thb7
MUSINGS OF A CYNIC.
An ounce of get-up-and-get Is worth! (
a pound of rabbits' feet
The beauty about happiness is that noi
man can keep It all to himself.
No man Is such a kicker that he wouia
care to kick tho bucket
No girl really lovos a man without
feeling an Irresistlblo Impulse to boss
him around.
It's all right to have taking ways, but
it is also Just as well to have a few
bringing back ones.
One thing the bald-headed man can
never understand Is why the world should
respect gray hairs.
Poets are bom. not made. Conse
quently Adam, with all his other faults,
couldn't have been a poet
Some men arc born fighters. They
fight for their rights, and when they,
get them they fight for more.
It's all right to let your light shine be
fore men, but It Isn't necessary to make
a pyrotechnic display of It.
Truth Is stranger than fiction. If you
don't believe It, havo an amateur pho
tographer take n, picture of you.
To be absolutely happy a woman must
have almost as much confidence In her
husband aa she has In her dressmaker.
New York Times.
PASSING PLEASANTRIES.
"Dlr! vmf Pan ,1 Tw I hI.I i -
qu jlto verses to his wife?"
,,' Voveiy, weren't they?"
i. tVpI2' .'Si'0! . A curious thing about
lU?. hai TninBletwanf.' isn't married."
Cleveland Plain Tealer.
"Pretty hard, I say, to take Wlgley at
his word.
JiiPrttty hard- w'Rley Is one of thoso,
rellows you hear always spouting about
possum, but nobdy ever saw him cat a
piece of one." St Louis Republic
V.,tUni'A an.. .A.i.t t , , , .
house last night when you went home
Crimsonbeak Did I? Say. do you re
member how rusty thrt night key was
last night? WMI, look how bright It Is
now. Yonkers Statesman.
"You will find this ' fellow a toughl
proposition," warned the merchant.'
Only one man has ever been able toi
collect from him."
"Don't worry." . replied -the bill col-.
lector, with a grin. "Anything that has
been dun can be dun again." Cincinnati '
Enquirer,
"Th- darn foolsl"
"Who?" -
"The Speedleys."
Why?"
"They've mortgaged their automobile'
to buy a home." Newark News.
"Here's something queer." said the'
dentist. "You say this tooth has nevcri
been worked on before, but I find small'
pieces of gold on my Instrument"
"I think you havo dug clear through,
and struck my back collar button," re-'
piled tho victim. Savannah News.
JES' 'FORE CHRISTMAS.,
Eugene Field.
Father c-alli mo William, sister calls mo
Mother calls mo Wlllle-rbut the boys call
ma Bill.
Mighty glad I ain't a girl rather be a
boy,
Without them sashes, curls and things
that'H worn by Kauntleroy.
Love to chuw green ppples an; go swim
mln' In the lake '
Hate to take tho castor-lie they give fr
bellyache.
Most all tho time the hull year roun'
thero ain't nn files on me.
But Jea' 'fore Christmas I'm as good as
I kin bol
.
Gran'ma says she hopes when I git to bo,'
a man
I'll be a mtssloner like her oldest brother
Dan.- . . i
As wuz o't up by the cahnlb'Is thai Jive
In Ceylon's Isle,
Where evory prospeck pleases an' only
man la vJle. '
But gran'ma she has never been to sce
a Wild West show.
Or read the life of Daniel Boone, or else I
I guesa. she'd know
That Buffalo Bill an' cowboys is good '
enough fer me
Except s 'fore Christmas I'm as good
aa I kin bo)
For Christmas, with Its lot's an lota uv
candles, cakes and toys,
Wuz made, they say, fr proper kids, an'
not fr naughty boys.
So wash your face; an' brush yer hair,
an' mind your p's and q'a.
An' don't bust out yer pantaloons, an'
don't wear out yer shoes; '
Say veasum to the ladles, and yesslr to
the men.
An' when they'a company don't pass yer
plate fr pie again.
But thlnkln' uv the things you'd like to
see upon that tree,
Jes' 'fore Christmas be as good as you'
kin be!