fHE BEE: OMAHA, THURSDAY, AUGUST 7, 1913. 6 THE OMAHA DAILY BEE FOVNDBD BY EDWARD noaBWATBI) VICTOR nOSltWATBlt. SDlTUIt. BBE HCILDINO. FAUN'AM AND l!TU. Bmertd at Omaha, portofflco as second data matter. TBRMS OF SUBSCRIPTION: Sunday Bee. one year "J Saturnay Bee, one year Dally Bee, without Sunday, one year. 4.00 Dally Bee, and Sunday, one year.... .w DEMVERED BV CA1UUKK. Evening and Sunday, per month... ... Kvenlng, without Bunday. per month.&c Ually Hee. including Sunday, per mo.c Dally Ilee, without Sunday, per mo..c Address all complaint of Irregularities In deliveries to City Circulation Dept. REMITTANCE. Remit bv dratt. exprts or postal order, pavablo to The Bee Publishing Company, only 2-cent atampa recelvod In payment of amall accounta. Personal check, ex cept on Omaha and eastern exchange, not accepted. . OFFICES: Omaha The Bee building. South Omaha-2318 N Street. Council niuffn-H North Main Street Uncoln-S Little building. ChIcago-901 Hearit building. New York-Room 1104. 236 Fifth Ays. St Loula-COO New Bank of Commerce. Washington 7S Fourteenth St. W. LumvcAirwrn wet' wm. Communication! relating to new and editorial matter ahould be addressed Omaha Bee. Elltorlal department JUX.Y tlRCUI-ATION. 50,142 State of Nebraska, County of Douglas, on: Dwlght Wllllama, circulation manager of The Bee Publlihlng ctompany. being duly eworn. aaya that the average dolly circulation for the i month . of JWYxJ wo 60,141. DWIOHT WlLulAMS, Circulation Manager. Subscribed In my presence and worn p before me M'n (Sl. Notary Public. Sabacrtbera leaving the city temporarily should hurts The Ileo mailed to llirm, Address trill be chnnsed often reaoeated. Every Uttlo stray drop of find a welcomo all lis own. rain Twelvo days yot to tho gas fran chiso oloctlon. Getting warmer 1 Chautalker Bryan doubtless wishes be could kick that Moxlcan situation Into a cocked bat. Tho "sick man of Europe" seems to have been playing 'possum, as tbo Adrlanoplo Incident suggests. One and all in tho United States are unanimous that wo want no war with Mexico unloss we have to. Come on with your million-dollar depot enlargements. Omaha is mora than ready for it But you'll havo to Bhow us. It madd Mulhall very mad for members of congress to contradict him. It made them mad for him to black-wash thorn. Castro is really having a hard time landing on the front pago with all the other Central American aide bows In progress. Our bull moose friends aro going to regulato railway rates by Initiative petition. Flnel .Go to It at once! Tho more tbo merrier. Johnny Bull ought to kuow, though, that cancelling his conces sions at the Ban Francisco exposition will not help him on tho canal lolls, Omaha bankers aro willing to give Secretary McAdoo their advice free, without even asking for any addi tional government deposits In ex change, St. Louis has teams in three big basa ball leagues, ranking last in one and next to last In two, What makes St Louis famous begins with "D," hut it is 'not base ball. Those postmasters who failed to vote the democratic ticket last au tumn aro now being reminded of It, in a perfectly gontlemanly and scholarly way, of course. The taxi may do a lot of queer things; its driver may forget where to go, he may have a puncturo or & collision, but did you over hear ot the meter (ailing to work? It is not surprising to hear what a high-flyer young Mr. McCormlck has become with his now aeroplane When it Is recalled that be is a eon' in-law ot John D. Rocketoller. And now we are told that the School board's financial estimates are nothing but "guesses," anyway Yes, but, why not once in a while give tho taxpayers the benefit of Uio guess? Senator Bacon of Georgia, whp was the first senator to be elected by popular vote, files an expense ac count of $78, which is not an argu went, so much as a proof, ot tho vlr tue of the new system. "Honor Nourishes the Arts" is the Inscription on the Carnegie Art Mu aeum. Honor may nourish tho arts, but it takes something a little more substantial to sustain tbo museums and libraries, as the good Laird of fiklbo well knows. Whoever imagined, while those promises were flying so thick and fast, that we would now have the gas company trying to reduce gas to $1 and our noblo Water board still fighting in the courts against com' Ins down to 25-cent water. If charging more than 25 cents per 1,000 gallons for water was "rob bery" when the old water company did it it cannot be any less "robbery now when perpetrated by tho Water hoarders, even though, of course. they '!nre all honorable men." The Bic-ht Kind of a Decision. Judgo English Is to bo congratu lated on the fact that his first Im portant decision slnco his accession to tho bench that denying auto cratic powers to our governor appointed election commissioner la on the broad grounds of equality be fore the law, and against discrimina tion between citizens on account of foreign nativity. Tho facta in this particular case stand out so plain, and the logic of tho judge's ruling Is so unanswer able, that persons reading the opinion must bo amazed that anyone clothed for tho time with a llttlo official power should have assumed to dis tort a law in the way the election commissioner sought to do. Judge English shows that under our new Dertlllon system of registration the voter's Bworn testimony Is taken "when unchallenged as to all the es sential qualifications as to his resi dence, bis ago, the time bo has been living in tho state, county utd city, his occupation, his conjugal condi tion, and oveh as to whether natu ralized or not but that credence at once ceases tho moment ho declares himself a naturalized citizen. Of course, as The Doe has from tho first shown, this outrageous ruling by tho election commissioner was merely tho outcropping of an antl forelgn fooling sprung from tho Idea that the forolgn-born citizen Is not as good as an American-born citizen, and thnt tho end Justifies the means when it comes to disfranchising foreign-born voters. Wo trust this de cision by Judgo English will help our oloctlon commissioner to realize that our free American Institutions de pend on a free and untrammeled bal lot, and that to stop fraud does not require wholesalo disfranchisement of ono of tho best olqmenta of our cltlzonsblp. live Stock Hailing and the Tariff. It Is generally agreed that tho chief factor in the high cost of meat Is not tho tariff, but failure of do mestic production to keep pace with consumption demand. A shortage of 30 per cent In home output is now reported. The new era on western ranges, in tho first place, obstructed growth of herds; tho general demand for choico cuts, in tho second place, Is depleting thom, taking the young stock to tho market Instead of ma turing It So tho call is persistent for more livo stock raising and tho effort has boon made by both tho federal Agriculture department and the stato agricultural schools to fos ter it. Yet, now comes tho democratic tariff bill with its free trade sched ules to cduntoract these etfortB and thwart them. But tho democrats cry, "We must admit foreign moat to force down prlcos at homo." Wo must admit foreign meat, but for the purpoeo of making good our own shortage and thus bring tho supply up to the domand, but freo trade in tho end will hurt, not help, the situa tion. Toko sheep, for Instance, as an example, Sonator Catron of New Mexico points out In a rocont speech that under the last democratic (Wil son-Gorman) tariff sheep went on tho free list and tho number of our snoop slumped in tho four years of this law's operation from 62,000,000 to 36,000,000, That should give us an Idea of how froa trade Is likely to affect the problem of our diminishing domostio supply of live stock. An Automatic Regulator. In view of the loud protest from express companies against tho Inter state Commorco commission's rate reductions, some of which thoy con' tond are noncompensatory, a few comparisons betwoon express and parcel post rates may be illuminat ing. For Instance, on a one-pound package Bhlppod from Chicago to Omaha tho rate by express now is 25 cents; as proposed it would be 23 cents, and by parcel post it Is 8 cents. From Chicago to Denver the express rates are respectively 30 and 24 cents, the parcel post rate 9 cents; to San Francisco tho three rates are 30 and 30 and 12 cents, And these ratios obtain generally as botween different potato. Even without considering some of tho alleged watered stock and huge dividends of the oxpress companies, It will be hard for them to show that tho proposed reductions would be non-compensatory compared with the government's parcel post ratos. Par cel post competition, as a matter ot fact, will be the best possible auto matic regulator of express rates. And It Is thlB competition that express companies must meet If they remain in business. Adoption ot Omaha's new homo rule charter will put a stop to nepo tism In the city hall. That as a starter will be a great help toward rooting the evil out ot the official circles ot state, county, school and water districts. Mr. Bryan says ho would do It, maybe, even It president, that Is, provided, he. wanted to and felt tho need. All ot which gdes to show that Mr. Bryan is at last doubtful ot teaching the White House. As additional evidence ot how completely tho automobile has put the horse out of business, let us mention that the four-footed winner at Ascot the other day sold for ?260,-000. Lookup BacWatd This Dm? in Oraalra COMPILED FROM azK mlcs nn AUGUST 7. oca Thirty Years Ago The public library la to be established In the Witt am s block, corner Fifteenth and Dodge. The officers for the ensuing years elected by the directors are: P. I. Perrine, Lewis 8. Ilecd, the assistant librarian; Miss Allen waa granted leave to attend the meeting of the American association at Buffalo, and during her absence her duties will be performed by Miss Stada Crowley. , Oerat rejoicing among taxpayers over the decision of Judges Neville and Wake ley In the district court aiding against the sandstono ring In the paving In junction caae. Rev. A, F. Sherrill left for a few weeks rustication on his brother's ranch at Plum Creek. Charles Wells ot the transfer freight depot hifl been presented with a superb Bible by his employes. Rev. Dr. and Mrs. Locke of Chicago are visiting at Bishop Clarkson's. Dr Locke Is tho well known pastor of Orace church. The Omaha Mannechor has elected these officers: William Mack, president: William IC Weckbach, vice president: Ernest Rausche, secretary. Job Hunsell, the right hand man at Max Meyer A Co.', Is again at his post of duty after a few month Illness, K. T. Andrew and family left for the east and Canada. The Union Pacific has purchased John Eheetey'a place north of the city for 1,?W. According to the Philadelphia Record. Harry Salisbury, member of the Forest City club and later with the Union Pa cific haa been engaged with a Cleveland club Twenty Years Aco Former United States Marshall Brad Slaughter came down from Fuller ton. chaperoned by tho Fullerton horseman, E, D. Gould. Mr. D. W. Richardson, one of the most gifted literary women In Iowa, ar rived In the city to visit friends. The executive committee of Central La bor union appointed a a committee to raise funds to defray the expense of Labor day celebration. Julius Meyer, Ico Hartley, Albert Fawkner, Charles New strom. The officer patrolling at Thirtieth and Valley streets reported to headquarters that a big fire seemed to be raging in the vicinity of Otbson, but nothing defi nite up to this time had been learned. William I. Kleratead, who returned from Washington county, where he sur veyed the corn fields, said that rain or shine, a good corn crop was assured there. He found eighty acres of com on James Crulckshanka' farm, which he thought would go eighty bushels to the acre. 'Millionaire" Tom Murray's "rook eries'' at Fourteenth and Jackson streets, were torn down by order of Building In spector Tilly. They were five In num ber and had been repeatedly condemned by the Inspector. Ladderman Maher of No. 2 truck, and Drivel Dubois of No. 2 hose, of Kansas City, were In Omaha, the guests of M. E. Gilbert, and Jerry Sullivan of hose No. 2. Dubois had the distinction ot be ing the driver of the fastest hitching team In the world, Joe and Dan, with a record of one and one-half minutes. Maher was famed the world over as an expert With the pompier ladder and both men had accompanied Chtef Hale of Kansas City on his European tours. Ton Years Ago The West omaha improvement club reached a point where It demanded a home of Its own and set a meeting for August 20 to talk of plans for getting one. Some of the luminaries In this were Were Judge W. W. Slabaugh, J, I Blako and a. P. Bostwck, The club had Its eye on a. piece o'f ground at Forty first and Dodge streets. Henry Dunn, chief ot detective, was a lover ot fine dogs and when he met a stranger at Sixteenth and Cuming streets with a pup that struck hU fancy, hp forthwith tell Into a business conference which ended with his paying the man I2.S0 for the dog. When the street car came, Dunn, leadlnr. the dog, stepped aboard. Not so the dog. All right The chief would lead him from the car. Not so. thought the dog. Doggie began to wiggle and suulrm. Not so, the chief; he kept holding onto the rope and the car kept going In the other direction. But the dog won. He left the chief the rope and collar and fled for his old mas ter, who had gone with the two-fifty. "It's an old trick and I fell for It," sighed tho wlley slueth. Rev. C. W, Savldge called his people together for the first prayer meeting In the new People's ohuroh building, CIS North Eighteenth street. President David H. Kerr ot Belleyue college gave The Bee an Interview, In which he urged the building ot a motor lino from Omaha to Fort Crook, passing the college. He said It would pay big, the college, the fort and the city. People Talked About Miss Qladys Mason of New York Is walking to San Francisco at the rate ot twenty-five miles a day. New forma of sin continually are neins discovered. The lateat Is that of work Ing hard, saving money, and becoming rich. Preventative dlreases among the chil dren of Chicago exact a heavy toll of life and coat In money over JIO.000,000 annually. Jimmy Goodtlld ot Farmlngton, Conn., I years old. Is one of the moat accom plished as well as the youngest member of a real fife and drum corps In tha state. A hundred thousand soarf pins bearing her Initial were ordered by Queen. Ellxa beth ot Belgium and were sold In the streets on her birthday, July S, In aid of the antl-tuberculosls campaign, In which she has taken a lively personal Intereat. Fr Philip J. Magrath ot New York haa organised a band of twenty -four pieces composed of firemen and stokers on trans-Atlantic liners who frequent hi mission. The men made all the Initru ments except four harmonicas and three concertinas. George Belrles of Lewis count)', Wash Ington, has made a stable large enough for two horse by hollowing out thn tump of a giant fir tret- He original!) hollowed out the stump to make a store housr, where he kept seventy-five aacks of potatoes, and later enlarged U to Its prtaent dimensions, Kxll feet Twice Told Tales A Blirn of PoTrty. They were talking about poverty a few evenings ago, when Congressman Gilbert N. Haugen of Iowa told ot an Impression a man from the rural wilds once got on visiting tho city. The rurallte, tho congressman said, had gone to the town on a long-antlcl- pated visit, and when ho returned -10 hud much to relate of the city ways and what he saw. 'They put on all kinds of fancy frills up there," ho narrated to the eager crowd at the corner store, "but I don't believe they hev got half ,the money they pro tend ter hov. 'Well, do tell!" wonderlngly exclaimed one of the eager listeners. iu Jon t rally mean it, Jake?" Yaas," was the convincing rejoinder ot Jake. "Ono night I went by a hoiuo thtt looked purty big. but les' ther same, thel people In It were so darned poor thet two wlmmln wo playln' on ono planner." Philadelphia Telegraph. Evasive Spelling:. Prof. Alfred E. Stearns, principal ot the Phillips Andover academy, said at tho recent alumni dinner In New York: 'The easiest way In raising funds, a it: other things. Is the wrong way. I re member a man and his easy spelling rule "In Orange In my childhood I once complained of the difficulties of spelling. I said that el' and 'Je' in auch words as 'bellevo' and receive' always slumped le. "Then this man patted me on the head and smiled and said: " 'My boy, I will give you an Infallible rule of 'el' and 'le' a rule that in forty-seven years haa never failed me.' "I expressed my delight and waited. The man resumed: " 'The rule Is simply this: Wrlto your "1" and "e" exactly alike and put your dot exactly between them.' " Washing ton Star. VVIig Ynnnnr Wife. Not all young matrons aro so unso phisticated as soma persona think. Ono striking exception resides In Harlem. Entering a butcher shop on tho eve qf a largo houso party to be given at her home, she saw displayed a dozen chickens. "Please pick me out. a half dtwen chicken that are tough," she said. "I have a special reason." The butcher put aside seven- "Are these all?" she asked. "Yes, ma'am," was tho reply. "The aro all tough ones." "Then send the other five to my house at once," said the young matron.' The butcher Is guessing still. New York Times. Editorial Snapshots Springfield Republican: That repub lican postmaster whose office Is sought by e democrat on the ground that he has the mumps Is entitled to retort that his rival has too much cheek. Bt Lous Republic: In the light ot con ditions In Venezuela, the Balkans, Mexico and China, wouldn't It have, been better tor Mrs. Fish ahd Mrs. Astor to have postponed their battle for the Newport throQ? Boston Transcript: The Mexicans one now frenxledly claiming that they are closely related to the Japanrse. Have a care, have a care, the Japs, you know, fight at the drop of the hat when they are Insulted. Indianapolis News: Ten cents a kilo watt hour for current that costs the manufacturer J. 031 57 to produce Is surely going some, even In three days when corporation are entitled to a fair return on their Investment Philadelphia Ledger: Ot course, If the southern and western banks take the government's funds at 1 per cent and rush them to New York, where they can get more for them than at home, Mr. Henry will have the New York banks spanked for taking the money. Pittsburgh Dispatch: It seems to be a fashionable occupation along the New England coast Just'now to be robbed of ropes of pearls. Blesainga brighten as they take their flight and there Is strong suspicion that the pearls enhance In value the morning after they ore stolen. Philadelphia Record: This Is, Indeed, a collegiate administration. We shall soon be talking about a curriculum Instead of an administration, ana ma sessions or congress will be semesters. The young man who has the bright prospect of being . presidential son-in-law Is now In the oince ot tne district attorney in wen Yopk, but before the wedding he will resign and take the position ot assistant to the president ot Williams college. We shall have the statute books referred to as text-books yet, and presidential mes sages will be called lectures. Nebraska Editors H. Fribble, who has been publishing the Banner at Snyder, has quit the newspa per field, having been succeeded by A. & Nusx ot Fremqnt who Is now editor and publisher. The Kimball Observer, published and edited by R. D. Wilton since November, 1506, haa been old to V. II. CargllU for merly of Atton, la. The new proprietor Is a young man In years, but old In news. paper experience. Mr. Wilson, who ha made money out ot newspaper business, goes onto his ranch In Kimball county, where he will raise high class cattle, whloh haa bean hla fad for a number of year. W. W. Warner Is celebrating his twen ty-third anniversary a owner and editor ot the Lyon Mirror. Blnce Mr. Warner took over the Mirror, he has seen a new generation oume onto the atage of action In the vicinity of Lyons. Young men and Women have become gray haired since the birth of tha Mirror and alnce Mr. Warner's ownership of the paper, boys and girls have grown to man hood and womanhood around Lyon. Muffled Knocks When two girls are chum one of them uiually I homely. A girl can have auburn hair, but a boy 1 always redheaded. Anyway, us men won't deny that the uffragtat are old enough to vote. Any bartender can tell you that the emptiest men In the world are those who are full. A man with & red nose Is sure to das city color photography among the useless l6.Vcnllons.-Cluelnai.tl Enquirer. lUees Metl) oxl The Truth About Dob Inaeraoll. NEW YORK CITY, Aug. 6,-To tho Editor ot The Bee: In a letter signed W. T., recently published In The Bee, It Is asked what good has Infidelity done for the world, what orphan has ir cher ished? etc., and then W. T. says of In fidels: "For what ultimate end do you hope? Will yours be like that of Robert Ingersoll when dying, who cried out, 'God forgive me'?" As a member of Colonel Ingersoll's family, who was pres ent at his death, I ask for space to say that W. T.'a statement Is absolutely false and If W. T. read the dally papers at tho time ot Colonel Ingersoll's death ho knows it to be false. Colonel Ingersoll died as he had lived an agnostic. As to W, T.'s question as to what orphan In fidelity haa cherished It Is only neces sary to mention one name, Stephen Glrard, the Infidel, who did more for orphans than any man who ever lived. Why does W. T. hide his Identity behind Initials? Is it because he knows that many of his statements are positively untrue? SUE M. FARRELU AVns the Governor I in unwed Upon? OMAHA, Aug. 6. To the Editor of The Bee: ' Wonder, what our good governor thinks now of what was handed to him when ha made his election commissioner appointment Remember that grandilo quent announcement of his that' after hunting high and low he had succeeded In finding the most perfect man for the place a man who had no friends to re ward nor enemies to punish and who would run the oftlco with absolute equality to alt. But here, the first pop out of the box, another nppolntoo of the same governor, Judge English, takes him down off his pedestal, and shows that Mr. Moorhead has lawlessly and deliberately tried to disfranchise as many foreign-born voters as he could. He -went up against the wrong man when he drew the line on Father Williams, and now has to back down. It must be humiliating to Gov- ornor Moreheau. who is me responsimb man, to find how he was imposed upon by designing politicians, when he ought to bo shrewd enough not to be Imposed upon. IT AIRPLAY. Horoscope of Clvlllntlon. OMAHA, Aug. 5. To the Editor of The Bee: The world waa ruled by priesthoods for 5,000 years, ending In the French revo lutton. Since that drama, the preacher baa gradually disappeared from politics. As to the condition of mankind under priesthoods tt might have been worse. Religion today Is losing ground as a busi ness, but rearranging Itself as the chief social tonic. "If In thy neighbor's face thou evil see, Be It no triumph, but a glass to thee." The real rulers are out of sight, ex cepting In time of war or agitation. These rulers represent wealth. At the present time, civilization Is ruled by doctors and , lawyers. The two profession are agreed with each other. The doctors are the strongest combine In the land. They and ihA 1nwvrn rrtnllM 1l?lalntlnn! VAt.thAV all keep out of sight As legislation con- ! trots wealth, It Is easily seen who our governors are. The socialists aro useful In their task of disseminating primary fact and of giving valued hints to those higher up who have listening ears. But, as the socialists do not represent either wealth or labor unions, I cannot see that they will win as a party. Their only chance Is to start a bank In every county. Tho reign of the doctors and lawyers will continue at least 900 years yet A year now Is a much as 100 year In ancient time, civilization will make a shift In the not distant future, setting the doctors and lawyers aside and choosing another phase of rulers. I see two profes sions gradually rising. They are not as ancient as either tha lawyer's or doc tor's; but their training) has been swift and their knowledge ot mankind Is broad and fine. I refer to the editors and actors. They know human being aright; tor their constant theme 1 man, woman and child. The editor and tho actor are not yet perfected by time. Still the day 1 not far oft when thetr Insight Into human nature will be Incomparable. Philosophy will flourish. The high conclusions ot unbiased minds will shine afar, and war become obsolete. Yet money will rule. Now, money abhors war and disturb ance, and Is, Indeed, the most conserva tive force. It sets up different phases and personalities to rule, and will continue to experiment till It find the sanest I expeat women to control the banks In the futre, or enough to prevent war. "Slow streamed tho progress of the humankind. Crested with light, but lost In mist be hind. I saw the towering crests of ancient state Arise and pasa ana now tnemsoive to late. Colossal Egypt on her car rolled by. Drawn by a cloud of slaves with lash and cry: And now a slave herself, and sold again. sublime in rum on the crumbling main. And yet her mummies seem to firmly house Those ancient souls whom Time did once arouse. Their chill resemblance lingers in tha stone. Still far from htaven, which remains un known Two knights that for Truth's mystery conicna With flashing spears, seem not to com prehend. But, ilk cyclones, seeking pleasure Urge, They crash together li tremendous Charge." J. M. HOLADAY, The Odd Fellow. OMAHA, Aug. I To the Editor of The Bee: Before a young man can unltf. With a lodge, ha must be 21 year ot age; but a boy ot IS may be an odd fel low by following a few simple rule: First Speak of your lather with be. coming respect, and of your mother with reverence, for they gave you life and attended you during Infancy, and many of the services they performed for your benefit were by no means agreeable and pleasant. Be not ashamed to sit with your mother In the church, or with your father In the lecture hall: It may be an old-fashioned Idea, but no exercise Is oetter adapted to strengthening , and stimulating a good conscience, than the services of the church; while hearing good lectures and reading tha elastic will produce a genuine aristocracy of In tellect and fortify the mind azalnst the depressing effects ot disappointed pride ana empty expectation. If you follow the Instruction your companion will tan you an odd fellow. Second By the time you arrive at man hood, you will have learned that a good man chler delight la to be useful to others, and by closely examining the ac tions and Inclinations of men, you will discover that men of superior endow ments tab their greatest delight In the home, and that the happttet people are those who ahun the worldly pleasure that charm without Instructing, and are fit only to pleas the common and vulgasJ mind. If you are wise, you will keep yourself free from the oppressive dic tates of the fashionable throng, who de sire no greater advancement In life than to Imitate and flatter each other, and whose selfish and narrow minds are con stantly filled with acrimonious reflections caused by social disappointments and the furious operations of anger and Jealousy. By keeping yourself "unspotted from the world," you will be called by the smart act, .an odd fellow. The last degree la that which "crowns the fabric"; you can now move forward with undisturbed regularity and self conscious straightforwardness. Your busi ness, though modest, Is Becure; your lit erary study Is a pure and sincere pleas ure, the burning temptations of youth are safely passed, and 61d age finds you with a solemn regard for religion, ana a mind well etored with curious and In structive knowledge. Some of those who formerly called you a "Methodist" and a "miser," will be glad to cat a cold lunch from your kitchen table, and being ah odd fellow you will be glad of the opportunity to Imitate the good samarl-tan- E. O. M. LAUGHING GAS. "There Is something uncanny about that railroad." "What Is It?" "it hasn't had but one fatal wreck In ten years, and then the company never blamed It on the engineer." BalUmoro American. "You look happy." "I feel hotter than I look." "What's happened?" "Fate has relieved me of a heavy burden." "Yes?" "Last night somebody stole my wife's rubber plant" Cleveland Plain Dealer. "While you are In asking papa for my hand In marriage, Philip, I'll be playing something lively on the piano," said tho sweet young thing. "No, I wouldn't do that Jessica," re plied the young man, "you know some people can't keep their feet still when Going from Home, to the Sea Shore, make your headquarters at THE PLAZA NEW YORK Fifth Arenue and Fifty-cinth Street ' Delightfully located opposite Central Park, assuring peace and quiet. Summer Terrace Restaurant. ( The coolest Hotel in New York. Convenient to theatres and shopping district. Special Rates daring the Summer Season FRED STERRY PV.1$'.'$ Managing Directed l&MMSm5r Engravings can be made either from PWfl Engravings photographs or ooject ltseir. The engraving plant ot The Omaha Bee Is thoroughly equipped to handle) every detail. Including making the original Photo graph or drawing. Our each because he is the best In his own line of work. Our equipment Is the newest and best When you need Illustrations, give us an opportunity to show our ability. A newspaper,. engraving plant makes onta which show gooa" results under most difficult printing1 conditions. Our prices reasonable. EsjraYiig Department, The Bee Poblishin Ct. 1704 Parnam St, Omaha, Neb, NATIONAL LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY MONTPEMER, VERMONT Organized .1830. Purely Mutual. Assets 850,038,807.81. "The National Life is one of the really great mu tual companies of America, a big dividend-payer, a truly policyholders' company." (The Insurance Keport, Denver, Colo., January 1KU.) The National has soma excellent opportunities for local and district agents; in the State of Nebraska, where it has Invested over $3,800,000. Correspondence is Invited from successful men of good char acter who are Interested. Address: JAMES V. STARRETT, Stato Agent, , . , 401-3 Paxton Block, Telephono Douglas 120. OmabaVKeb. they hear lively music" Yonkers States man. "He's a mean man." "How so?" "When his little girl begs for an lee cream sundae, he asks her If she wouldn O rather have a cold watch when she's 13." Louisville Courier-Journal. Hlbbs I'm thinking seriously of resum ing business. , . olbbs Why, I thought you had retired permanently. Hlbbfl 1 thought so. too: but I need some excuse for not attending my wife a afternoon teas. THE CITY. Gordon Johnstone. There's a brave world I know called Tha Great Out-o' -Doors, Where the wind and the wave lure our feet And the 'green o' tho field meets the wan, tired eyes , , . With the touch and the kiss o' a lost paradise; .. ... , Where the chickadee calls and the wild taglo soars, And the lark trills his sweetest o l5ut give me the city! Its pain and Its pity, Its highways and byways o' heat Oh. a roan may live on a hilltop alone, Where the days are- a-wtng on a song. But he'll never sound depths that aro human and deep By running away from tht, herd o the sheep, By shutting his heart to the trar and the groan O the lovable suffering throng. So give me the city. Its grief and Its pity, Its apenthrttt, Its weak and iK strong. Oh, hero Is the Kingdom of Fair Worlds to Be When the peace-rides come silver shod. For thorn Isn't a cavil, when all's said and done, That the Maker In making MEANT ALL TO BE ONE, As the streams of the nations that merg In one sea And move at the wind, of His nod. So hall the Wprld-Clty, Its pride and Its pit'. That's built on the high road o' God. can be made either from drawings', or direct from tha engravers have been chosen. J8H mm