The Omaha Sunday Bee Magazine Page
Copyright, mx, tr ths BUr Company. Qrest Britain Mg-hta RtisrvtCL
''
Profiting by Mistakes
of Her Previous
Suitors, "Grizzy" Thompson
Wins the Most-Courted
of Ml Bachelor
Maids, and Proves
That Love and
Courtship Can
Be Made "100 Per
Cent Efficient
EF , May Van
r Alan Who
Lost the Heart
Newport Thought
She Never Had.
Mrs. David Dows, a Former Member of May Van Alen's Coterie of Bachelor
Maids, Which inefficient" Courtship Made Possible.
vain aijbn win never
marry."
For years this has been
society's favorite comment whenever
the name of Miss Van Alon, daughter
of James J. Van Alen and grand
daughter of the late Mrs. Ascor, was
mentioned. The smart set long ago
crowned her "Queen ot the Bachelor
Maids," and there seemed to be good
reason for society's belief that she
would continue to hold that title as
long as Bhe lived,
It was no lack of suitors which
doomed Miss Van Alen to. bachelor
maidenhood. Ever since she made
her debut, seventeen years ago, her
heart has been the object of persist
ent attacks from a never-ending suc
cession ot men young and old, rich
and poor, including all the most de
sirable prospective husbands In
America and Europe. Thero has
never been a time when there was
not at least one man keeping society
on the qui vive to know
it he was really going to
win Miss Van Alen, and
nearly always there were
two or three spirited con
tests tor her hand In prog
ress at one and the same
time.
Fortunes wore spent in
the effort to win the favor
of this capricious queen
every artful method known
to love-making was tried;
one lover even made good
his threat to commit sui
cide unless be could have
her but through all this
siege Miss Van Alen re
mained as unmoved as Gib
raltar. One after another
bcr suitors retired from the
lists in despair, leaving be
hind them a record of blast
ed hopes long and varied
enough to furnish tho heart
Interest for a dozen novels.
"May Van Alen will never
marry," they all declared.
"She has no heart."
Dut now, like a thunder
bolt out ot a clear sky,
comes tho news that the
"Queen of the Bachelor
Maids" is to be dethroned
that - May Van Alen will
really marry! Hqr engage
ment to a baker's dozen of
eligible men has been rumored at
frequent intervals during the past
fifteen years, only to be promptly de
nied -by her watchful father. In this
case, however, Mr. Van Alen's formal
announcement leaves no room for
doubt that his daughter and Grlswold
Thompson, once of Philadelphia, now
of Newport and New York, are to be
married In September, if not sooner.
All ot which proves that society
has been wrong all these years in
declaring Mies Van Alen heartless.
The trouble has not been with her
heart, which is qnlte evidently a pen
tectly normal, warm-blooded Beat of
emotions, but In the fact that never
until now was It assailed in the right
way When the right man appeared
In the person of Grlswold Thompson
and applied the right methods to his
courtship, Miss Van Alen capitu
lated quite as readily as It he had
heen the first man to court her.
mow did lirlzzy" Thompson do ItT
How was he able to make May Van
Alen love him when so many other
more experienced men had failed?
Hero Is the explanation the ex
planation that is Just beginning to
dawn on the "wise ones."
"Qrlzzy" Thompson succeeded
because he had tho Intelligence to
seo that the science of efficiency
can be applied to problems of
the heart as well as to tho more
sordid affairs of life. Let us see Just
how ho applied tho principles of.v,,
scienuuc management to tno proo
lem of winning America's most fa
mous bachelor maid.
It was in the Summer of 1911 that
Newport noticed the great friendship
between Miss Von Alen and the good
looking Btranger from Philadelphia,
who was being sponsored by Mrs.
Adolf Ladenburg. Mrs. Ladenburg
arranged many introductions for him
and Mr. Thompson, or "Grizzy," as
"Frankie Otis failed to win her with
French novels, but 'Grizzy' helped
his case immensely by reading
the Sunday papers to her.'
tie was going to apply the principles
ot this practical sclenco to his court
ship, or how shrewdly he would profit
by the mistakes of all the suitors
who had preceded, him.
Just what Is efflclencyT Lot Mr.
Thompson answer: "It Is getting
what you want when you want it in
the quickest possible time and with
the least possible exertion."
What "Grizzy" Thompson wanted
was nothing less than the heart and
hand of May Van Alen that part ot
the problem was quite simple. And
the tact that Miss Van Alen's per
sonal fortune runs high up Into the
millions probably did not dampen
Grizzy" Thomp
son "100 per cent
efficient" at love-making.
tho ambltloUB young
Phlladelphlaus' ardor
one bit.
-But how to make this
woman love him? How
to win most quickly and
easily the bachelor maid
who bad been rejecting
millionaires, wine mer
chants and popular
club men long beforo
"Grizzy's" high school
days were over? These
wore the problems
which wrinkled Mr.
Thompson's manly fore
head tor hours at & time.
"How did all theso other follows go
about It? What did they do that
made their courtship end in failure?"
Like a flash "Grizzy" realized that
his chances of success depended
upon his ability to answor theso
questions. He forthwith determined
to familiarize himself with all the
previous courtships ot Miss Van Alen
and to turn tho mistakes of his pre
decessors to his own advantage.
Of course he already had qulto a
smattering of knowledge of this sub
ject, for no one can be long In Now
port without hearing a great deal
about Miss Van Alen's numorous
m
ill I f
4T . t
U)
mm
mi
"Other men had
lavished expen
sive bon bons on
her-the efficient
'Grizzy intro
duced her to the
delicious lolly
pops at a cent
apiece.
Grizzy's trolley trips scored the
hit which the Duke of Man
chester's $20,000 motor
car tours missed."
he came to be known, speedily made
good wherever be went, but almost
from the first It was plain that Mlsb
Van Alen held for blm more Interest
than any of the other society belles.
Of course, there was nothing sur
prising in this. It was generally
considered Impossible for any man
who wished to make a satisfactory
impression on Nowport to escape
taking at least a passing interest in
her.
When Mr. Thompson began court
Ing this most Invincible of all bache
lor maids, the old-timers merely
their favorite comment about Miss
Van Alen's heartlessness and added
with an air of the greatest assur
ance: " 'Grizzy' is hound to Iobo out
Just as all the others have done."
But when they said this they were
not taking into consideration
"Grizzy's" remarkable efficiency.
Ihey did not realize how ingenious!
"Ralph "Ranlett's champagne brought him nothing 'Grizzy'
tried the effect of nut sundaes and ice cream soda."
lovo affairs. Mr. Thompson, how
ever, was dotormlned to go about
his task in a thoroughly sciontlfla
way and to gather tho required in
formation as far as possible from
first-hand sourcoB. To do this ho had
to become something ot an anti
quarian, for Miss Van Alen's first
suitor, as near as Newport's oldest
Inhabitant can romombor, entered
tho lists back in 1896, two years bo
foro tho Spanish-American war.
Harry Lehr waB this first suitor.
He was backed by Mrs, Astor, and
was a great favorite In Newport
what could havo boon tho reason why
ho failed to win MIbb Van Alon?
"Lehr was too feminine" That
was "Grizzy's" decision after glean
ing all the information he could
from Nowporters old enough to travel
back In memory to the gay Summon
Ot 1898-1897-1898.
Score one for efficiency! "Grizzy"
Thompson promptly began to mako
his masculinity as pronounced as
possible. He wore only clothes that
were rampantly mannish, he danced
little and studiously avoided pleasing
tho ladles by retailing club scandals
as Lehr used to do. Soon he waB
pleased to note that tho more he em
phasized the efficient side ot his
nature, the moro his favor grew in
Miss Van Alen's eyes.
"Bunny" Hawkes was the next
suitor to claim "Grizzy's" attention.
Ho had followed on Uio heels
of Harry Lehr and had squandered
great sums of money in lavish enter
tainments for her. Some ot the most
costly luncheons and dinners ever
given at Sherry's and Delmonico's
were arranged by him in her honor
and yet. May Van Alen's rejection ot
"Bunny" Hawkes was as emphatia
as it bad been in the case of Harry
Lehr.
"Ah," said "Grizzy" Thompson, a
great light beginning to dawn on
him, "She doesn't like oxtravagance.
I will be frugal and saving. I'll buy
sandwlohos for her at the delicat
essen shops and take her to lunch
eon at Chllds'B."
On second thought, however, this
Beomod a bit too crude, oven for Mr.
Thompson's efficient soul, and he
compromised by taking her to Bronx
Park on picnics. Whon they woro
at Newport he gavo little parties for
hor on Easton'a Beach, where thoy
ate their frugal food out ot a basket
without the assistance ot any plush
clad flunkies or solemn-faced butlers.
After lunch they paddled barefooted
In tho wator such tun I
Efficiency scored again Just as it
had in tho first Instance. Miss Van
Alen Bhowed qulto plainly that she
liked these simple affairs far more
than "Bunny" Hawkes's" elaborate
restaurant spreads. And as "Grizzy"
noted her satisfaction bo became
bolder and carried his suddenly ac
quired frugality to an oven more
closo-flsted extent Several times
he even pretended he had forgotten
his money and mado her produce
her own purso and pay tho carfare.
With all the care of the efficiency
expert he was fast becoming,
"Grizzy" carefully noted tho effect
ot his unusual methods upon Miss
Van Alen. It it was not helping his
causo, It was at least making her
stop and think about blm. Having
been courted all her life by men
who Bhowered hor with money, her
interest could not help being aroused
by tho novelty of a suitor whose
pockets often lacked carfare.
Ralph Ranlett was tho third in tho
long list of Miss Van Alen's suitors
whose mistakes taught her latest
lover how to make his courtship ef
ficient. Champagne and the finest
hothouso flowers were the high cards
he had rolled on to win bis game,
and he had lavUhod these on her
as only a millionaire can.
"Grizzy" was quick to take his
cuo from tho fact that all Ranlott'a
extravagance had availed him noth
ing. "No orchids, no cold bottles
of extra dry for me," said "Grizzy,"
and, true to his word, he and Miss
Van Alen became regular patrons
of the soda fountains, where
"Grizzy" frugally regaled her with
nut sundaes and ice cream. The
expensive florist shopB knew him as
a customer no more, and the only
flowers he gavo her were the wild
"She refused 'Bunny' Hawkes in spite ef hid
; - expensive dinners, but she loved' 'Grizzy'
all tho more when they went
wading after a basket picnic
at the beach."
ones which ho gathered with hl4
own hands.
Tho wealthy Commodoro Waters,
ot Baltimore, was another suitor
whoso final rojoctlon showed the ln
efficiency ot extravaganco in court
lng a mllllonalross. Whon "Grizzy"
found out that tho commodoro had,
surfoitod her with wonderful cruises
on hta palatial steam yacht, this
apostle ot efflolent love-making be
gan taking her to Conoy Island and
up tho Hudson on ordinary excursion
Bteamers. To his great delight, this
capricious Nowport millionairess
declared ono day that sho enjoyed
theso llttlo trips far hotter than sho
over had any of the cruises on Com
modoro Watera'a yacht
"At last," crlod "Grizzy," "I am on
tho right track. All I need do is ta
play the part of an ordinary flO-a
wook clerk, and May will wind up
by loving mo."
But "Grizzy" was too efficient a
love-maker to risk ruining his
chances by any display of ovorcon
fidenco. Although ho began to sea
that ho waB certainly making head
way, ho did not glvo up for a minute
his exhaustive investigation into tho
experiences of MIbb Van Alen's pre
vious Bultors.
Francis Otis and Cushing Stetson,
he found, bad courted her at tho
samo tlmo and had both tried to
travel tho literary route to her affeo
tions. Stetson usod to read her
reams of his "Blue Jacket" stories,
whllo Frankto Otis tried to win her
with French novols.
But Miss Van Alen had quickly
tired of this form ot devotion, aa tho
record ot tho past performances of
Messrs. Otis and Stetson shows.
Therefore "Grizzy" declared that
literature bored blm to death. In
stead of novols and poetry, ho
brought her armfulB of Sunday
papers with their comlo supple
ments and colored magazine sections.
Long tours In his S20.000 motor
car had been a feature of the Duk
of Manchester's unsuccessful court
ship. "Me for the trolley cars," said
'Grizzy,' "and under his guidance.
Miss Van Alon Boon became an en
thusiastic trolley tripper.
Tho Bad tragedy of 1902 mado a
tremendous impression on "Grizzy"
when ho learned Its details. Robert
Romlngton's engagement to Miss
Van Alen had been considered a sure
thing one day came the rumor that
it had been broken and then Rem.
ington shot himself. "One man has
died for her," said "Grizzy" grimly,
"but I will show her that whether
sho loves mo or not I will llva and
live with a smile on my face."
Othor men had given her expensive
bonbons; "Grizzy" taught her to
llko lolly-pops. Others gaye up their
business hours to court her; "drlzzy"
worked In his brokerage office from '
9:30 to 6:00 o'clock every business
day. Othor men talked of herself;
"Grizzy" talked about himself.
And "Grizzy" Thompson's efficient
methods have at last made May Van
Alen lovo him. He has won the ten-million-dollar
heiress, the mansion lot
Nowport and tno proud distinction
of being a "100 per cent efficient
lover "