8
TIIE BEE: OMAHA, TUESDAY, APML 8, 1913.
THE OMAHA DAILY BEE
rot'NDKD BY SDWAltD ItOSEWATER.
VICTOR UOSBWATKIt. BOlTOIt,
BEJE BUILDING. FAItNAM AND 1TTH.
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correspondence:
Communications relating to news and
editorial matter should be addressed
Ore aha Bee, Editorial department.
MARCH CIRCULATION.
52,644 "
State of Nebraska. County of Douglas, ss:
Dwight Williams, circulation manager
cf The Bee Publishing company, being
dujy sworn, says that the average dally
circulation for thf month of March. 1913.
Was B2.5H. DWIGHT WILLIAMS,
T Circulation Manager.
Subscribed In my presence and sworn
f .fore thBrtEVfHEif"
(Seal.) Notary Public.
IjSnbscribers lenvlnir the cltr
tmporarllr should liare The Bee
iftolled to them. Address Trill lie
changed as often na requested.
An oyster plant is not even a good
imitation.
Almost time Tor Modlclno Hat to
take off Its fur cap.
Last month with on "r" In it, and
last call for the oyster.
And the rain falloth equally; upon
the Bholtofod and tho roofless.
Tho flood waters of tho Mississippi
must be simply trying to catch up
wih tho high coat of living,
t i
ptUI, fear of being hit by tho in
come tax will not stop any ono from
seeking a boost of his salary.
t'Ono swallow does not make a
spring," an ozchango reminds us. No,
fcut three fingers make a .swallow.
One of the khodlvo'B wives is re
sorted missing. How could tho hon
orable khedlvo miss just ono?
c
Just being mentioned for tho
speakership Is enough to mako Vio
Murdook happy for a little while.
A Minnesota paragrapher speaks of
"whistling in the faco of an Omaha
cyclone'' Oh, has it coma to that?
Fifty thcuand, Welsh miners threaten
to strike In protest of the employment
of nonunion miners. News Item.
Yep, spring is here.
It has been almost a week since
Frank Gould passed up Jala nntlvo
land and things have not gono wrong
yof.
"How hard it 1b to divorce office
getting from politics," oxclalms
Blxby. In the language of tho stroot,
"It can't be did."
if Ambassador Pago ovor decides
tot-publish his dlplomdtlo oxperiencos
h'wlll bo able to got tho very best
prices on the work.
Although tho litter and wreckago
lywj been largely cloanod up, no ono
Will havo any trouble In tracing tho
track of tho tornado for many a day.
"Tho saddest of all said things is
an Easter bonnet caught In tho rain,"
Observes tho Baltimore American.
No, father receiving the bill beats It
lor sadness
'Chicago has aj-aputatlon to malm
tain," exclaims Mayor Harrison
Well, haven't Hlnky Dink and.rBatll
House John just been re-'olectod fof
tho 'steenth time?
That" tscwb- item tho other day
which told how -J. Edward -Jddlcka
came neqr. to .gplrjg to. Jail,,, reminds
ono of how near ho camo to going to
jthe senate, at ono time.
With 300 fat new J6bs to give out,
Governor Johnson of Califdrnia will
3iave himself to blame, surely, it tho
state government does not progress
so as to continue his crowd in office.
President Wilson. would shine as
a precedent smasher. Dut there aro
somo places where he even draws the
line for example, he has not yet
takes, the vice president into bis cab
inet
)
Now as soon as President Wilson
succeeds in revising tho tariff and
distributing those 1,400 Jobs among
the 181,000 applicants to the satisfac
tion of all, he may proceed to the
next order of business feeling fairly
good.
Suppose some one should proposo
tho same scheme for the new charter
to put it into effect at once. Ir
respective of the wishes of the peo
ple, with the proviso that they may
have a chance to vote in two or three
rears, whether than want to keep it
bt not
Test of the Tariff. 1
Mono but a tariff export, and then'
only after careful comparisons, can!
pass a welL founded Jttdgment on
what effcctB may be oJtpected to fol
low tho proposed tariff changes. Thoi
people in general, howover, will hnvoj
their own test for whatever legisla
tion may bo enacted, and this' test
will be simple. Democratic opponents
of protection havo charged the tariff
with bolng responsible for tho high
cost of living, and have denied, that
tho tariff duties are instrumental In
any porcoptlblo degree In maintain
ing tho wages of American worklng
m on at a level above those of wngo
workers abroad. Tho popular test
of the. tariff then, in tho long run
will be whether it roducos the prlcos
of commodities commonly consumed
to an appreciable oxtcnt, without
lowering tho scale of wages or throw
ing American workmen out of em
ployment.
The democratic tariff will como up
to specifications of platform prom
ises only by noticeably pulling down
tho high cost of living, and at tho
samo timo keeping up the high rato
of wages,
Belief and Restoration.
A distinct lino of demarcation can
be drawn between the work of relief
and the work of restoration. The re
lief work almB at caring for im
mediate and pressing necessities. No
storm victim should bo permitted to
go without food, clothing and shel
ter, hut help along these lines,
barring a comparatively fow excep
tional cases, ought to be Btrlctly tem
porary. With tho business district
untouched, all employment unim
paired, and the payrolls unchecked,
another week ought to cut off tho
vast majority of tho demands for as
sistant of this kind.
Tho restoration work, on tho other
hand, must go slower, and last
longer. Tho adjuBtmont of equities
and obligations will toko timo, and
tho damaged houso ownerB who can
look out for thomsolveB must bo
sifted from the othors who noqd
help. The rebuilding operations can
bo set in actual motion only when
the proliminary complications oro
cleared away.
Tho present month ought to soo
tho end practically to relief work,
after which all onergies may bo cen
tered on restoration.
President and Congress.
Mr. Wilson's announced dotormlna
tlon to address tho congress in per
son, lnstoad of sending IiIb message
to bo read by a clerk, has occasioned
intorest that has overshadowed evon
tho tariff talk for tho mpmont. Just
why this should bo so 1b not exactly
apparont; it has not been tho custom
for mftny yoars for the oxccutlvo to
personally address tho legislative, bo
causo a long line of presidents have
rigidly observed both tho letter and
tho spirit of tho constitutional bar
rier between tho oxocutlvo and tho
legislatlvo branchos of tho govern
ment. This inhibition Is easily trace
able to condltons that prevailed and
theories that existed at tho timo tho
constitution was framod. Tho wis
dom of ho practice may woll bo ques
tioned.
No possible harm can como from
tho' president going to the halls of
congress to deliver hla message. If
it should develop that thlB is not
meroly a "democratic" poso, but a
real offort to koop closor together
tho branches of tho government that
havo froquontly of lato years been
at loggerheads, tho breaking of the
precodont will havo boon woll done.
Dut if It leads later to embarrassing
or strained rolatlons botwoon execu
tive and legislative, then the prac-
tico will again have to be abandoned.
Advertising for Publio Servants.
WANTED By the Board of Education
of Kansas City;
Tho most up-to-date young public
school educator in the country to become
superintendent of schools here when
Superintendent Greenwood resigns. The
Job now pays W,600 a year.
Also, a live wire, practical man, thor
oughly educated in his line, to become
superintendent of the vocational nnd
night schools here.
Also the best high school educator In
the country to become superintendent of
the high schools here. They practically
Uavs-no supervision now.. ...
Also, first-class men for principals ot
high schools. Theso Jobs now pay 1S.S00.
-This advertisement recently ap
peared in Kansas City newspapers.
It is unusual In the United States to
advertise for public servants, though
it is done frequently in Europe, espe
cially Germany, whose municipalities
aro run by experts famous for ef
ficient administration. It is custo
mary for Gorman cities to advertise
for mayors, engineers, oto. This
tends to remove city government
from politics, Just as the schools are
supposed to bo out ot politics.
The Kansas City project will be
'worth watching for. Several fea
tures, aside from the mala one, are
Interesting. For instance) note the
demand for tho very best talent at
salaries fair, but not unusually large,
and the appeal for men as high
school principals. One might Justly
conclude that Kansas City's schools
were not being satisfactorily con
ducted and that a determined feeling
had set in for improvement.
This tariff revision by separate
schedule seems to have looked better
to the democrats wnen they wore
merely an obstructive minority than
it doea now when they are the re
sponsible majority.
Looking BacWatxi
LTliisD in Omaha,
COMPILED VROM
DEC
FILES
CP
AI'IUL 0. ? 000
Thirty Vcnrn Ago
"What Is Truth" Is tho subject of a
sermon delivered by lie v. W. J. llarsha
at tho Presbyterian church thta morning.
The ntmosphero grew perceptibly
warmer thla afternoon Ami hlorh wind
pievalled.
Rev, Dr. Stetllng manifests signs of
Improvement according to tho statement
of hla physician.
Tho call of Omaha council of O. L of
H. Is signed by a. W. Wlllman, secre
tary.
The steamer "Black Hills," leaving St.
Louis for Fort Clinton with paasefgers
and freight, will reach Omaha about the
Twenty-fifth.
A llttlo son of Mr. Dufrcne tho archi
tect, whllo playing In tho Millard hotel,
slipped and fell three stories, striking
on the stair railing and although un
conscious when examined by Dr. Hydo
was found to havo broken no bones.
J. W. Cutrlght of Plattsmouth was tn
tho city.
C. K. Cralte, the blond basso of tha
Omaha Glee club, has returned from I'le
east.
From tho county commissioner's rec
ord It Is disclosed that J. N. Pierco gels
JS3.23 a month as salary as superinten
dent of tho poor farm, and his wife gets
(2d a month as matron.
MubIu lovers aro looking forward to tho
cencert of Miss Lydln I. Harm, tho
pianist of Chicago, asststod by local
talent.
M. a. McKoon has returned from Cali
fornia. A. Booth, tho great oyster man, was
among the through passengers yester
day for 8an Francisco.
Twenty Years Ago-
Colonel "Benham left for Hot Springs,
South Dakota,
Tho first cricket game of tho season
was played between a team of married
men and single men at tho Fair grounds
and won by" the marrlcds.
Fred Dollono and Ed Riley left for an
extcnslvo tour of the west.
Mr. and Mrs. Ira. M. Mopes returned
from the Paclflo coast, whero they had;
been for four months.
Tho city council refused to voto for tho
removal of tho city jail from Eleventh
and Farnam streets, where, therefore, It
would remain for at least two years.
Tho demand came up on a petition signed
by Dewey & Stono, A. J. Poppleton and
Heventy-flvo others, who felt that the
prison was too nonr tho business center
of tho city. Tho resolution to accept the
purchase price of the Board of Education
for tho old Dodgo school at Eleventh and
Dodgo a a city Jail, was lost Another
proposition for getting tho school was)
made and defeated.
Mrs. John Oroves went to San Antonio,
Tex., for several weeks, being accom
panied as far ns Kansas City by her
husband. City Clerk droves.
Allen W. Tourgee. the noted novelist.
author of "A Fool's Errand," was In tho
city for tho day. He commended Tho
Bee's fight against crooked state officials
which was at Its height
Ten Years Ago
The hearing of the case of tho Chicago
Great Western against tho Union Paciilo
for tho privilege of crossing tho Missouri
river bridge, inaugurated before Special
Master in Chancery C. W. Pcarsall, was
contlriucd until April 20 on application of
John N. Baldwin, attorney for tho Union
Pacific.
Mrs. Merriam West, wlfo of J. B.
Went, died at the family home, MZ3 Sew
ard street.
Omaha turned the tables on the Chi
cago Cubs, beating them 2 to 1. Dummy
Taylor pitched and Frank Chance
caught for the Cubs, whllo Bruner and
Companion pitched for Omaha, wltn
Johnny Qondlng behind the bat. At thai,
Omaha did not win tho gamo on many
hits, for It only got two. It scored its
two runs in the third Inning when Joe
Dolan walked and went to second on t
hot groundor by Jack Thomas, who was
safe, and both were moved up a base on
Patterson's sacrifice. This leemed to
nettlo Taylor, who deliberately walked
Qondlng and fanned Companion nnd
proceeded to dispose of Bobby Carter,
who picked out one he liked and sent It
hurtling down the third baso line, scoring
Dolan and Thomas. Carter made the
only two hits .pmaha got Chance, Tay
lor, Tinker and Evers each got a triple.
People Talked About
Governor Dunne of Illinois, also bears
the distinction ot being the father ot a
family so large that it la often mistaken
tor a moss meeting.
When the house caught fire Mrs, H. J.
Bumham's pot terrier In St Louis re
fused to quit guarding her Jewels, valued
at (3,000 until called off by Mrs. Burn
ham. Prof. Taft lectures for far less than 11
a word at Vale. He apparently makes no
attempt to realize on the full cash value
attaching to hla prestige as an ex-presl-dent
Captain Lewis C. Schilling, St sole sur
vivor of the Alamo massacre and adopted
son or Kit uornon, was round dead, hav
ing starved tn a shack In Reno, his sav
ings of eight years, $330, reserved from his
pension money, having been filched from
his pockets.
Dr. A. J. McKelway, southern secretary
of tha National Child Labor committee.
states the case of the southern mill
worker In these words: "We work in his
mill, Wo live In his house. Our children
go to his school. And on Sunday we go
to hear his preacher." The federal bu.
reau of labor found In 108-09, that Ml
children under 1J years of age earned less
than 13 a week In southern cotton mllla.
apd 7S1 children ot U and IS years earned
less than J a week. Out of 52,400 workers
In the cotton mills, only 1,444 earned from
8 to 13 a week.
colonel ocll Lyon ot Texaa, Chicago
and Armegeddon, Is seeking relief from
the ravages of battle traveling In India.
He carries along a goodly slice of the
famous Texas thirst which requires ex
port service to satisfy, That's what the
colonel found in Ceylun, and he stayed
wun n ana teus aooui it. The con
fection was a Manhattan cocktail, and
the mixologist swarthy, athletics fellow
With black hair held In place by a comb.
The rest of his uniform consisted of
swallowtail coat and a clout. "You
ought to come to Ceylon," the colonel
writes to the parched nutlves bt the dry
counties at home, "just for tha experi
ence of watchlnr the cocktail mixer.
And then after you have seen the pro
ceeding and drank your drink you are
The Omaha Spirit
Wausa Gazette f We are proud of the
spirit of sympathy manifested by the peo
ple of Nebraska for the tornado sufferers
at Omaha and tho telling manner In
which this sympathy has bee'n expressed,
liberal contributions to the relief fund
having been rushed in from almost every
llttlo town and hamlet In the state. A
mighty responsibility now rests upon the
relief commission In the distribution of
these funds. The poor folks who were
left destitute should be, given first chance
and their homes rebuilt and even fur
nished. Not a dollar should go to the
rich man who had ample Insurance or
who even If he did not, Is perfectly able
to rebuild.
Itlverton Review; Out of the terrible
disaster that came to Douglas county,
comes a most refreshing view of the hu
manltarlanlsm of man. We learn that
the Douglas county taxpayers Intend to
answer tho question, "Am I my brother's
keeper," In spirit and in truth. They are
asking the state legislature to pass a
law that will .permit of them bonding
Douglas countjifor the purpose of fur
nishing money to loan io the unfortun
ates In the city of Omaha, to replace and
to rebuild their homes. In other words,
thoso who are fortunate are ready to ubo
their credit and to obligate their belong
ings In behalf of those who have lost
their all and are dependents. This Is
Indeed a refreshing; sight
Geneva Signal: Some of the organiza
tions In Omaha boastfully proclaimed
that ithat city did not need any relief
tiom the outside world following its
Easier "storm, but the people of other
parts of Nebraska nnd elsewhere will
probably not pay much attention to such
foolish talk, some of the worst destruc
tion wrought by the storm was In thoso
sections of the city where colored
people lived In dense groups. The peo
ple of Omaha aro not going to give those
people all of the relief, or the kind of re
lief they will need. Neither Is there any
reason why the outside world should not
help. Omaha will not be damaged com
mercially if Its people, accept relief, and
undoubtedly It is the commercial feature
that was given chief consideration when
the announcement was sent out that
Omaha did not need help.
Nebraska City Press: What was that
eastern scientist hinting at when he said
the Omaha big wind originated In Lin
coln? Blair Tribune: Mr. Dunn, a flno singer
of Omaha, thinks he Is a hoodoo to tho
churches as several of them In which he
has sung have been ruined by storm,
struck by lightning or stepped on by an
elephant This lakes a big load off our
mind. We feared that the fact that some
of the Nebraska editors who had been
Invited to occupy the pulpits of the
Omaha churches on June 1 among whom
are Mr. Van lAcusen of trj Pilot and the
Tribune editor might have had some
thing to do with the recent wrecking of
the Omaha churches, but it is very sweet
of Mr. Dunn assuming the responsibility.
Fremont Tribune: It was in a spirit of
self-sufficiency that Mayor Dahtman and
the Omaha Commercial club gave It out
that no old for Omaha was necessary
from the outside It would have been
fine had this been truo; but, unfor
tunately, it was not. The need at Omaha
la extremely urgent and every generous
Impulse may well be registered In dollars.
The Commercial club' has backed up.
Nebraska City Preea: Omaha Is a won
derfully progressive metropolis and Its
growth during the last dozen years has
been the pride of Nebraska. The message
sent out by the Omaha Commercial club
to the purport that Omaha Is able to take
care of Its own has done the city In
calculable harm and has diverted atten
tion that should haye been focused on Its
troubles. Tho spirit that prompted the
commercial organizations to say that
help would not be needed Is an admirable
quality, but the effect of this near-boast
on the real sufferers .from the tornado
the hundreds who are without a cent on
earth has been a bad one.
Tabloids of Science
Automobile crematories to follow an
army In battle to dispose or the aeaa
are suggested by a German military sur
geon, i
Using electrical cooking devices', a
London restaurant is enabled to oharge
lower prices than other similar places
of the same class which cling to old
methods.
Light Is admitted to a lenseless camera
Invented In Germany that seems to have
many practical uses through slots, either
vertical or horizontal as desired.
Using two reflecting prisms a Trench-
man has invented a microscope with but
one objective lens but which gives a
stereoscoplo view of anything examined.
By removing a strip of bark from
around an orange tree a Florida man
made it produce mors and larger fruit
but at the expense of the tree's longevity.
Bven under the most favorable condi
tions white, yellow, green and red are
the only colored lights which can be
projected more, than three miles through
lenses.
A German Investigator has discovered
that plants resist cold best when they
are given special nourishment to keep
them warm. For Instance, to feed a plant
sugar stimulates Its power of resisting;
low temperature.
Around the Cities
Buffalo is planning to bury all wires
tn tho heart ot the city.
Nashville, Tenn., Is about to baud a
new city nan to coat $400,000.
Yonkers, N, T., has a birthrate of Z7.1
per J.OOOr-hlghest In that state.
I'nnaaeipnia is t&iKing or Duucunsr a
new bridge over the Schuylkill at South
street
San Francisco Is selling off its fire de
partment horses, having Installed auto
apparatus.
Ban Franctsoo Is to have a twenty-five
story office building on the southeast
corner of Market and Fourth streets.
A 3-year-old child dropped from a bal
cony to the ground, a distance of forty
five feet In Chicago, and didn't get a
bruise.
For public places a New Torker has
Invented a machine which shaves a cake
of soap Into thin pieces, which drop Into
the user's hands, the advantage being
that any sized cake of soap can be utilized.
WeesMeil
ox
An Ontrnae on Poor People.
OMAHA, April 7. To the Editor of The
Bee: We would like to know If the
Water board has taken over tho whole
water plant of Omaha as owners? If
not, who gave them the right to tax the
consumers J1M.O0O per year for hydrant
rentals? Who gave them the right to
charge, what they Call, the minimum rate
of 50 cents per month, after compelling
the consumer to pay $11,25 for a meter?
Since the tornado the writer has had
occasion to visit and talk with a large
'number of the common people, like my
self, of Omaha; many of these people
leave home In the morning, both husband
and wife, and not to return until night,
hence they use very little water; these
people use on ah average ISO gallons per
month or twenty-four cubic feet. The
old water company never charged these
smalt consumers to exceed 35 cents per
1,000 gallons, but the present self-styled
owners have put In force what they call
a minimum, and all these small con
sumers have to pay for 1,000 gallons of
water per month whether they uee It or
not, and with the bill Is a notice, "If not
paid promptly the water will be shut off.
All right-minded people consider this nn
outrage on the poor people of Omaha,
and It the consumers generally had a
chance to vote on tho question they
would voto the water plant back Into
Private ownership In double quick time.
Here's hoalng that the legislature will
give us a square deal. J. G. A.
"0,nlvern" for New Hotel Nitnie.
LINCOLN, Neb., April 6.-T0 the Edi
tor of Tho Bee: Some time ago In re
sponse to your request for suggestions
for names for the proposed $1,000,000 hotel
at Omaha the writer offered three
names awocinted with the earliest his
tory of tho state. Among them was
"Qulvera." The recent discoveries of
Dr. Glider, which Is verified upon fur
ther exploration, will confirm tho claim
for this name beyond all question for
Omaha's new hostelry.
"Tho Qulvera" will fix the association
of Nebraska's earliest history In the mind
of travelers and give Omaha world-wide (
celebrity. W. S. DELANO. ,
Call It Pernccntton.
OMAHA. April 7. To the Editor of The
Bee: It makes a true American's heart
blood boll to read ot the way the English
courts and the rabble are persecuting the
suffragettes.
And what do tho women want? 8lmply
the right of petition and to participate In
enacting laws, or in other words, to havo
equal rights with men in choosing their
representatives vho enact their laws.
When wo think of tho frail and timid
Mrs. Pankhurst, who was here but a few
months ago, being sentenced by a bull
headed English Itoberspterre to three
years if prison and when wo sec her
In our mlnd's-eye facing a cruel Judge,
defying him to do his worst, ending with
theso words, "It Is my only ambition
to live tn see the women and mothers
of England have their equal rights with
men to vote; but I shall 'not partake ot
your prison food, and If I die I die," one
Is forcibly carried to Patrick Henry,
when he uttered the Immortal words, "I
know .not what course others may take,
but as for me give me liberty or give
me death." George III and his satel
lites would, gladly. If they cduld, have
beheaded Patrick Henry John Adams arid
others, and these brave women of Eng
land are asking and demanding the same
as our forefathers the right of petition
and the right to choose their represen
tatives. Long live the suffragettes.
SYMPATHIZER.
The Woman's Clan Benefit.
OMAHA, April 6. To the Editor of Tho
Bee: It seems a pity that such slight
comment was elicited by the first dra
matic entertainment given hero for the
"relief fund the two performances of
fered by the Womans' club, assisted by
members of the Players' club. Prepared
at top speed and under high pressure,
with all the consequent handicaps, they
were. In spite of this even not consider
ing this at all remarkably smooth-run-nlng
and successful, a highly creditable
result
The ploys were brief and sketchy,
separatod by a long Interlude ot ex
tremely pretty dances with as graceful
a troupe ot porformers as we often see
on our stage. The dramatic -contingent
Included some ot the best amateur talent
in the city, who accepted the drawbacks
of the situation with the best possible
grace, for the sake of the good cause,
and throw themselves heartily Into their :
work giving their best efforts for the
success of the undertaking.
It would seem only fair that the gener
ous, painstaking spirit, at least, ot such
performers should be recognized. It less
than usual Is said about them It is no
doubt because of the general absorption
In those very conditions which appealod
to thtlr own sympathies. It Is pretty
certain, however, that their efforts were
appreciated by everyone who saw them.
A special word ought to be said about
one of their number, Who assumed a rolo
that she had never even seen before, and
played It after only five days' study,
most effectively. Mrs. Harry Doorly per
formed this feat taking the part of
"Hannah," in the comedy sketch called
"Raspberry Shrub Sec." presented at the
matinee a trying, highly unattractive
character, of broadly comical makeup, to
which Mrs. Doorly did full and unrelent
ing Justice. It was hard to realize her
identity, for those who have seen this
charming amateur actress In such roles
as she has usually played. To assume a
character of that ungracious type must
require great artlstlo enthusiasm, as well
as great self-effacement, which Is gen-,
erally well recognized and admired by the
andlence.
The scenery employed for these plays
was very happily chosen, simple but
agreeable In 'every Instance, and In the
dancing Interlude quite beautiful. The
performers, the club members, and thoso
managing the whole affair, should be
complimented on the vigor with Which
they carried through the swiftly Impro
vised affair, and on Its very attractive
nature. A. L. M. K.
Nebraska Editors
The Wlnslde Tribune was sold last Sat
urday by J. C Efclcer to John J. McCoy
ot Le Mars, la.
The Fllmore Chronicle has Just com
pleted the Installation ot a new cylinder
press.
P. P. Mende has sold the Heemer Ttmei
to O. II. Mayfleld of Norfolk. The.
chance became effective April 1.
P. P. Compton, editor of the Greeley
Cltlten, Is writttur a series of descriptive,
letters to his paper from Southern California.
JOLLIES FROM JUDGE.
First Amateur Photographer Did that
expert show you how It was done?
Second Amateur Photographer Tos;
but he didn't show me how to do It
Customer That was the driest flattest
sandwloh I ever triml to chew Intol
Walter Why, here's your sandwlchl
You atq your check!
Crawford Is the postscript nlwayB the
Important part of a woman's latter?
Crabshaw It Is when It's from vour
wife. That's whero she always mentions
how much money she wants.
"The board of censors threatens (o close
up the place."
"Wliat s wrong?"
"Just ns the hero was klfslng. his sweet
heart, tho film stopped and held them In
that position for over ten minutes."
Helper We're going to have a big
crowd here, and It'll be some Job to keop
cm moving.
Manager That'll bo easy. Take down
that rear exit sign, post up tho word
"Free," and they'll all bolt for it.
"Did Julius give you a stone-set ring
for your blrthday7"
"Yea isn't It n Iwntifv? TH11 whJ.;"
"But you were born In March. The dla-
mond Is tho Wrthstono for April."
"That's right; but as long as I
know
Are You Bine and Worried ?
Nervous ? Some of the time really itl ? Catch cold easily and frequently suffet
from biliousness or headache P Hie reason is that your system does not rid itself
ot the poisons in the blood; just as impossible as it is for the grate of a stove to rid
itself of clinkers. The waste does to us exactly what the clinkers do to the stove;
make the fires burn low until enough olinkers havo accumulated and then prevent
its burning at all. Your liver is sluggish you are dull and heavy sleep does not
rest, nor is food appetizing. In this condition illness develops. Doctor Pierce's
rjoroen medical Discovery eradicates the poisons from the body a glyceric alter
ative extract made from bloodroot, golden teal and mandrake root, stose and
queen's root, without the use of alcohol. No matter how strong the constitution
Mas. Blake. Dr. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets refulate liver aad bowels.
Tourist Sleeping Cars
via Rock Island Lines
Every Day
To
California
via El Paso and New Mexico
The Direct Route of Lowest Altitudes
the warm winter way to Sunny
Southern California.
Through cars, via Colorado
H the Scenic Route.
Low One Way Fares
Daily to April 15th
Faroe
ADVERTISEMENTS
We Will Pmide An Estate of from
$2,000 to $10,000
for Your Family
Parable at your death or In ten or twenty annual Installments, If you will
pa us a small rate of Interest on It during your lifetime.
A man aged thirty-five at the time of securing this contract, would pay
us. plus a small Initial expense, at the ra(e of only one and one-third per.
ceut of the principal per annum. The cost at other ages la at same low rate.
Ai this small coit can 70a afford to be without this protection?
There are many attractive features about our contracts, which wa will
be pleased to explain upon request.
ADVERTISED BATES QUABAHTEED BT ElfTHlS ASSETS.
GUARANTEE FUND LIFE ASSOCIATION
BESEBVE FUND OVDB
r. W. TjrraSiaQTOM, District Uunnr.
664 BRASraEIS BXTrLDIMQ.
Julius, my birth month Is suing to bo
April.''
TO THE UNDERPAID GIRL.
New York Tribune.
If in a factory you toll,
And enn't by hook or crook
Earn fairly for your dally needs.
Pray, why not be a cook?
If, at a counter forced to serve,
Your're fate you cannot brook,
Why not another calling tfy?
ltesolve to be a oooki
1
You talk of Independence girls,
Give It n secohd lookl
You're slnves to worry, work and want
Far more than any cook.
Good times or bad, you never need
Bo friendless or forsook;
You'll have a homo and food and
If only you'ro a cook.
A nobler and more honored task
AVho ever Undertook
Than she who thrice a day supplies
Our primal needs the cook?
pnyi
Girls, some may scoff, but well I know
1 m speaking by the book
Nine times In ten, sho won't regret
Who learns to be a cook I
the stomach is apt to be " out of kilter at timet ; in come,
quence the blood is disordered, for the stomach it the labo
ratory for the constant manufacture of blood.
Mas. Benj. Blake, of Port Dover, Ont, Box 36, writes! "I have
been a great sufferer for years from throat trouble, catarrh, lndlircitio
femalo troubles, bloating, conttlpatlon and nervousness at times 1 wou. '
be In bed, then able to be up again. Was under ninny different doctof-'
care, and would get better for a HtUe while, then I would go down v H
chronle inflammation all through me. For nineteen years I had ll,,
poljon In my blood. After trying nearly everything I ant worao. I tctj
In The People's Common Sense Medical Adviser of Dr. Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery and Dr. Sage's Catarrh Remedy. I have taken the
Golden Medical Discovery and 'Pleasant Pellets,' and have used fivo
bottles of Dr. Sage's Catarrh Remedy. I am now able to do my work
and walk with pleasure. I feel Ilka a new woman. I enjoy everything
around me and thank God for letting me lire lone enough to find some
thing that made me well again."
Let mo help you plan a delightful trip
J. S. McNally, D. P. A. .
14th and Farnam, W. O. W. Bldg.
9T
Th parcel post makes
It easy to roach country
buyer?. Tho city mer
chant can send small or
ders so fast that dlstunco
no longer hinders trano
with the people out in tin
state. Let them know
what you can send them
by parcel post and you
will improve your busi
ness. Small Bee want ada
will effect the desired re
sults. TJeo Wont Ad Department
Tyler 1000
The Bee Engraving De
partment will make a
drawing and cut like this
for 3.50.
OITS MOUOV DbLLABB
PHONE DOUC&AB 7C"1
I
J
ready to die."
hi
