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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 29, 1913)
'imi BEE: OMATIA, WEDNESDAY, JAXtARY 29, 1913.
THK OMA1LV DAILY BRK
Fbt'NtTRD HY BOWAHD IlOHHWATKIl
VIPTOn MOS1SWATKH. BDITOR.
MKK mm-PlNO. TARN AM ANO lTTII
" Knttrol i Omaha postofflce as second-cla-s
TKRAIS OF subscriptioni
r-imaa Ilrr, on year ff'J;
Saturday Bee. one year
Dally Pre, nltbont Sunday, one year. 4.W
raii Hee. and .Sunday. n year- 6.00
HKLivBtiKU in cAnnmn. -
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ErtnitiK without Similar. Ptr month., 2ac
rally Ilee, InotudlnK Sunday, per tno. 6Jc
Dally Uee. without Sunday, per mp... 45c
Address all romplalnts or Irregularities
In delivery to Clt CMrculKtlon Dept.
Remit by draft, express or postal order,
rjavahle to The Ilea Publishing- company.
Only J-rent stamps received In payment
of small accounts. Personal checks, ex.
cept on Omaha and eastern exchanse. not
Omnha The Uee butldlnjr.
Suth Omaha -MIS N street.
Council Bluffs 14 North Main street
Mnooln-M Little bulldlnB.
Chicago 1011 Marquette building.
Kansas City Rellincn building.
KeW York-S4 "West Thirty-third.
Ft. Louts 403 Frisco building.
Vatfhlngtoii-TaB Fourteenth St. N. W.
Communications relatlnc to news and
editorial matter should bo addressed
Omaha Bee, Editorial department.
Bta?.- of Nebrnsl.n. County of. DoukUs, s;
Dwlcht Williams, circulation manase
ot The Hee Publishing company, belnfi
duly sworn, says that the average dally
circulation for the month of December,
11S, was 0.044. DWIOI1T WILLIAMS,
Subscribed In my presence and sworn
to before ma this Slat day of December,
IMA ROBERT HUNTER.
(Scat.) Notary Public
JAXl'AltV 0. ? POO
BnbscrlberM Irnrlim tun city
ictuporarllr aboulil hirvft Tbe lire
mailed to them. Address, trill be
cbaneeil aa ntifu an requested.
And still -we do not doubt that It
may yot enow.
Skirts, It is ttald. will bo tlghtor
scat spring. How can they bo?
Literary merit and tho "best noli
ore" are not always aynonomoUH
Air. Morgan has g6no-to Egypt to
worry over theMonoy trust Jnvestl-
Turkey not only soems to "havo
Romo Band leit in us crop, but a
Jew brickbats, too.
In the Scrap Heap Again. I
A proposal Is before the leglsla-j
turn to do away with tho use of vol-.
Ins; machines In Nebraska by repeal-'
Inp the law authorizing their ln-
atallatlon. . .
Whon on a particular occasion two'
years ago suit was brought In court -Thirty Vcnrn Aro
to enjoin their use for tho then lm- Th 'location of the state fair at Omaha
ponding county election, a terrible i for another two years Is settled by
outcry was rained by the democratic
World-Herald against this atrocious
outrage which, It declared, would
throw Into tho scrap heap $50,000
worth of voting machines paid for
out of tho public treasury. To dis
continue voting machlno voting, wo
wero told by this democratic organ,
would bo equivalent to a rapo of tho
ballot, a consummation of a clover
conspiracy and an assault on tho
liberties of tho people that must bo
repelled at all costs. And then,
within a few weeks, the democratic
county board voted tho machines out
of commission, since which time they
havo not been recallod.
(lotting back to the main proposi
tion, experience In Omaha with tho
voting machlno has shown It to pos
sess many advantages In Its Infalli
ble accuracy, Its oxp'dltlon and Its
automatic count. Tho one fcaturo
thnt haB evoked objection auu wo
aro not suro whether It Is peculiar
only to tho particular machine used
n Omaha Is that the party lovor 1b
strongly conducive to straight party
tickets. It tho machine could bo
ltBed with facility without the party
lover, this objection would bo re
moved and Iho advantages rotainod.
"We believe, thorofore, that It
would be bettor not to repoal tho
voting machlno law entirely, but to
nmond It so as to romove tho party
over along with tho party circle
from tho ballots, and to permit the
uso of tho voting machine whenever
it can be readjusted to comply with
such requirements. Tho machine if
used should, wo insist, glvo every
candidate running for office on any
ticket an equal chance with his com
petitor to sccuro tho voter's atten
tion. A nhort ballot on tho voting
mnchlno, permitting the recording of
Individual rlreforcnccs only, would
afford tho really desirable method
Aimed at Omaha
An exchange says a million dollars
In gold weighs 3,685 pounds and a
fraction avoirdupois. Ufn huh.
, And what .Is mord, tho ox-presldj?nt
who takes thb chair of law at Yao
will dignify It as wel)-as fll iti .
Jlr. Corey and Judgo Gary might
ropalr to n little room," Bay 8x10,
lock tho door and settle this matter
as to who .got tho gravy. i
Any man of 70; who can call him-
ecu a "Hfo-long dohiocfat," can lay
just claim, to belngva Vcrsatllo man
at .least In. his politics.
"Bobblo" burns will novor coaso
having birthday celebrations so long
as thcro Is a son ot bonny Scotland
In nny corner of tho earth. .
For what pooplo havb to pay for
milk in Omaha thoy aro certainly
entitled to lacteal' fluid up to tho of
iflclal standard, which Is none too
Tho chairman of tho Money trust
investigating committee Is namod
Pujo, but some of tho Wall street
witnesses call htm worso names than
Diners in fashlonoblo. New York
restaurants during the-wattors' strike
doubtless fool the ' realism, of .'tho
eong, ''The Mick Who Throw tho
President-elect Wilson talks as if
ho meant to bo president without
waiting for "tho aid or consent" pf
auy other democrat on earth. But wo
Dr. Hall talks as If ho wore labor
ing under tho delusion that his post
tlon In the democratic national com
mittee vested him with tho dlstrlbu
tlon of the postoffjee plums,
Omaha never lacked for candl
dates, such as they worn, for any of
fice, high or low, and It is lncredlbfo
that even a charter-ranking conven
tlon will go by default for want ,ot
aspirants for tho Job.
A Xew Jersey man declares no has
chewed tobacco slnco Andrew Jack
eon wan president and on his 100th
anniversary chopped wood all day,
Think ot what ho might havo done
had he let tobacco alone.
The Dignity of the People. -A
stereotyped legal phrase refers
to tho "peaco nnd dignity of tho peo
plo of the state," but whero is tho
dignity of tho poo pie- In such a dis
graceful spoctnelo as that presented
ut Springfield, III., whore n handful
of selfish politicians, by manipulat
ing a legislative deadlock, refuse to
lot a governor tako tho scat to which
ho wns elected? Perhaps Illinois
has grown callous to such humilia
tion, but that docs not lessen the
contumely a particle. Governor
elect Dunne stands In none too onvla-
bla n light in not finding a way to
assumo tho offico, which is his by
tho mandate of a sovereign people,
especially slnco the Incumbent, Gov
ernor Donoen, 1b eager to vacate and
plnco tho reins of government in his
meeting- of the State Hoard of Agricul
ture. The duto for this year Is the week
benlnntng September 10.
At the German school fair, which
closed Saturday night, the following
prizes were won In tho drawings: Chlld'a
dress by Mrs. Schroeder. clothes wringer
by C. Krelle; easy chair by George
Tzschuck; towel rack by Miss Clara
'Wlndhelm; doll baby by Louis Schroeder;
flower, pots by Henry Pundt; silver bou
quet stnnd by Henry Dltzen; morocco
stationery case by M. Toft: china cup by
Krcd Met. Jr.
The resignation of John G. Morse -s
superintendent of the Omaha Klectrlc
company has been handed In.
Itellef for the needy, a warm meal tree
of charge, at Free Majons' hall each day
from 1 to 12, rear entrance.
W. 8. llelphrey will begin a class In
dancing for ladles and gentlemen, new
beginners, In his rooms over Wyman'i.
He will also give a party Saturday aftor.
noon for children.
Ilutli Ilebekah lodge No. 1. has In
stalled these officers: Mrs. Monroe Wtt,
noble grand; Mrs. Hattln M. Armstrong,
lcc grand; Miss Alice B. Dean, secre
tary: Mrs, K. htuht, treasurer.
Mrs. J. 11. Wilkinson Is homo from a
two months' visit In Boston and New
J. 15. Markel and family left for San
rmnclsoo and 'Los Angeles, to be gone
-Twenty Years Ago
S. H. Beman the celebrated nrchllect
who, It will ..e remembered, designed Tho
Beo building, was In the city and calloil
at The, Beo ofilce to sen his friend. Jid-
Joe Choynskl, the California heavy
weight, sent word that he would be here
to box Jack Davis of Hloux City before
tho Omaha Athletlo clUb February 2.
Peter Jackson, the famous negro puglll-it,
was to have met Joo at this time, but
became otherwise engaged.
Bov. T. J. Maokay delivered an elo
quent address at All Saints' Episcopal
church on tho llfo and character of lit.
Itev. Phillips Brooks.
M. UtHoyt and A. B. Blckley of Hush-
vllle were In the city on a visit.
Will M. Sanderson of Lincoln was In
Louis Baptlste, the well known wrestler
of St. Louts, arrived In town' with 17S
pounds of good bone and muscle which
he wished to pit against nit comers. Ho
was ready to stake a purso of any size
almost that he could bent the best at his
Hobble Skirts and Woman's Bights.
Breathing out an anathema urlon
tho hobble skirts, Dr. Jonkln Lloyd
Jonos snys thoy have "hobbled wo
man's rights." A little Incident has
occurred in Lob Angeles that tends
to refute this. Tho railway corpora
tlon oporatlng all tho suburban lines
radiating out of that city Iiob been
forcod to ngrco to lowor all the stops
on its cars for the accommodation of
women w'earing hobblo skirts. . The
women find difficulty In mounting
tho higher stops with tho tlght-tlt
ting garments, nnd so they persisted
In their demauds until the company
felt obliged. to.yleld,
It does not nnuear from this that
tho hobble' skirt has circumscribed
woman'8 rights or powor to achieve
hor desires. When Dr. Jones adds
that "hobblo skirts are the despair
of the Industrial world," he1 comes
nearor' tho fact at least in this case.
Tho Los Angeles corporation was evi
dently In. despair or It would never
have given up to a. freak of fashion.
Pender Times; Tho Omaha Bee makes
a good showing In opposition to the plan
to Increase the number of the supreme
Judges. Nebraska ha seven Judges, Five
states have more than that number, viz:
New Tork, New Jersey and Washington,
each nine; and Michigan and Maine, each
two. The supreme court of Nebraska
needs no more Judges, but It ought to
have some new blood on the Job.
Holbrook Observer; No matter what we
westerners think of Omaha, one thing
we must all admit, nnd thnt Is that Us
buslnees men arc nbout the llvest bunch
of boosters In the state. That Is what
makes Omaha tho first city of Nebraska.
Many of our smaller cities and villages
could profit by Its cxamplo.
Aurora Sun: Omaha, has quit flghdng
that Is, advertised' ristlc encounters at
which the public Is 'expected to attend nnd
pay toll. What n dreary place Otnnha Is
coming to be!
York Times: Representative Sugarman
of Omalin seems to bo the candy kid all
right. He Is Intent on getting a Inw en
acted for purer elections. There Is no
complaint, nor reason for any, outside of
Onmha. Tho people will be curious to
eo what kind of a law It will be that
will make them honest In that burg.
Kearney Hub: The legislature Is asked
to come to the resauc of Omaha and pass
a bill Intended to secure "honost" elec
tions In that city. We may bo somewhat
at a loss to understand whether this Is an
admission that Omaha has been having
dishonest elections or whether It Is merely
In the naturo of a wise precaution or a
"Ktltch In time."
Howells Journal: Score one for Omaha
a squad of police put a stop to a prize
fight down thoro tho othef night. Who
enys the world does 'not move?
Falrtmry News: They are having a
great time trying to name their new hotel
In Omaha and The Bee is publishing a
column ot suggestions evory day. But
up to the present time no one has thought
the name "Dnhlman."
Fremont Tribune: Representative Lo-hm-k
Is a Jncksonlan democrat and pur
poses to apply his principles In passing
out poitotflces. Evidently wim
Ktenhens and his primary plan In mind
ho suld, "No election of postmasters for
m,. I aim willing to assume the responsl
Kin... nf anv nnnnlnlments I have to
it will ho Interesting to observe
tho outcome of the two methods and see
who .gets farthest. Otto or nan,
Ten Years Ac
Major John U. Lynch, paymaster of the
United States army, spoko on "Cuba nnd
Cubans" at the Young Men's Christlnn
association, under tho auspices of the
Bishop Worthlngton becum, a little or
ganization maintained by the Church of
Bt Philip the Deacon. "Nlnoty per cent
of the Cubans," said this prominent negro
soldier, "are Roman Catholics and since
Ixlng among them for years I havo more
lespret for that religion than 1 had be
fort." Two hundred braves of the Douglas
County Democracy met at the rooms and
elected tllese officers: President, J. 11
Jones; first vice president. George
Holmes; second vice president, J. Levi;
third vice Wsldent, Peter Hofeldt: socre-
'tary. J. F Morlnrty; corresponding sec
retary, Charles Emery; treasurer, J. J.
Maboney; financial secretary, Joseph Pa
punka; sergcant-at-arms, Harold Over
beck; marshal, Captain P. H. Mostyn.
The MoKlnley club gave an annual
banquet nt the Millard hotel attended by
800 guests, at which McKlnley was tho
hero of the hour. Many tributes of re
spect wero paid to thn martyred presi
dent after whom tho club was named.
President Frank Crawford presided and
read a telegram from President Iloose
velt conveying greetings nnd best wishes
to tho club. Charles G, McDonald, Oqy
ornor Mickey. C. H. Adams of Superior,
Judgo Paul Jessen. Charles V. Itenvls of
Falls City had spoken when the orator
of the evening, Governor CMmmlns of
Iowa, was Introduced. He spoke on Mc
Klnley and the tariff and was most en
Twice Told Tales
Vico Presldunt-elcct Marshall evi
dently figures out that oven after
tipping the waiters, bell boys, but
lers, doormen and tho rest of tho
army, boarding at a hotel will be
cheaper than keeping house.
Tho Roosevdlt party In Iowa
threatens to "got" Scuator Cummins,
no mutter what, ho may do from now
on, all. because he dared fayor the
idea of reorganizing tho republican
party within itself. Perhaps when
Senator Cummins casts his eye over
the recont election returns In' Jowa
and observes thnt, as the Burlington
Hawkoye observes, "every successful
candidate for state, office in Iowa Is
a regular republican," ho will let
them go' ahead and "get" him.
It would seem that the plan of
two prominent Omaha churches to
consolidate, and establish a modern
Institutional church is In .line with
present-day tendencies. If such an
Institution were established down
i town, .easily available to men and
aan iranctsco does not rustr til- women not drawn to tho outlying
vorcing tbe Central Pacific from tho
"Union Pacific. This la ail the more
roason why Qmaha should give .moral
support to the demand of the Union
Pacific for control of the through
No -presidential appointments
made since the adjournment of con
gress last-summer, except diplomatic
and army promotions, are to bo con
firmed n order to leave .the placos
open for President "Wilson to fill.
Oh, what's, pushing and a. Jostling
the White House will witness as
eoontaa the new. tenant moves' in.
fashionable places of worship, It
might bring the spiritual power of
the church Into tho soctlons whero
their influence are most needed.
llazttt uttered a mighty truth
when he said, "Simplicity of churao
tr is, the natural result. at profound
thought." What a give-away , up-
simplicity. ui ;nurni.itjr ,. ivh.
. The.;Yale professor Wliotsalu that
'evori'. genius Is . fegjile-mlnded'
doubtless, felt tho overf-weening lm
pulse to suy aom'etrithK' that Would
attiuct attctUlyn to hi..i.
People Talked About
Colonel Teysslcr, a French soldier, who
has Just received the grand cross of the
Legion of Honor, wns commandant of tho
fortress of Illtche. which hold out against
the Prussians from August 8, 1K0, wntll
March. 2V MM. Ha Is now M years of
Cliorlii it. Flnlay. president ,e the
Xetns. National bank, New York, haa
pledged Sl.COO.OOO to Dr. K. F. Friedman
of Uerlln, If the doctors remedy cures
tho banker's toii-ln-lnw ot tuberculosis,
and 'does thn same thing fur ntnety-foW
Just to show the boys that the cares
of office havo not given him the tired !
feeling. Governdr Sulzer bt New York
climbed fc series ot Udders to r. height
bt fifty feet and made a personal Inspec
tion nt tho steel work on the capltol
Secretary of War Sttmson has approved
plans for providing tent shelters tor 5.000
old soldiers who are expected to partlcl
paU In the reunion of the blue and the
gray on the Gettysburg Damouem next
July to commemorate the fiftieth anni
versary of the battle.
Congressman Kzeklel Samuel Chandler
of Mississippi, better known as " Tomblg
be Zeke." the' other day bloomed out In
Washington clad In black frock coat.
tatent leather shoes, speckled walstscoat
ami silk hat- Southern representatives,
who got a. gllmpso of the show dodged
Into the nearest open door.
Through tho discovery of a Wbla brought
to this country Worn Kngland by James
Howard early In the eighteenth, century.
Charles Howard. Mrs. W. O. Hollster and
M. A. Proper ot Walton, N. Y., become
iirlra to a large English estate. In 18
the last of tbe Howard family In Eng
land died, and there apparently being no
.heirs, tho estate reverted to the ctown
Tho Bible recently oiescoveren snows
thnt the three Americans are the heirs..
How Hi Know.
With malicious chuckles the connois
seurs of New York arc retailing a
story, perhaps npocryphal, about J. Pler
Mr. Morgan, the Btory runs, was In
vited by a Fifth avenue dealer to view
n hoiuitlfiil set of nntlnuo Ivories. He
Inspected the Ivories, he praised their
loveliness, he even admitted their cheap
ness; but, shaking his head, he ended:
There's only one trouble. A doubt
stilt persists In my mind about, their
antiquity. That, ot course, Is an In
surmountable objection! for ln(all tho vast
Morgan collections there Is not a single
object about which the shadow of doubt
.The dealer, exasperated nt losing n
sale he had counted on, forgot himself
"Thnt Is not sd, sir. I, personally,
know of five objects In your watch col
lection alono that are neither genuine
nor antique, but merely modern copies."
"How do you know that?" Mr. Mor
gan asked haughtily.
"Because," replied the dealer, "I old
them to you myself."
Division ot Wealth.
The' late John Arbuckle, tho coffee
king, once said of Socialism;
"Socialism Is, In a word, the golden
rule. It Is excellent In theorybut worth
less In practice for human nature is In
capable of living up (o It.
"The proof of this lies In the socialists
themselves. Study the socialists In their
organlsntlons, their clubs and their homes
they quarrel and fight, they aro selfish
and vindictive, Just like the rest of us.
"Socialism, In this Imperfect and selfish
age. means not the division of your
wealth with your brother-man; It- means
the division of your brother-man's wealth,
with you." . r. :
Mayor ltockwell of Akron, .0., was
condemning tho claim, often put' fqrw'a'rd
by the rich, that poverty is good for tho
"Poverty is good for nobody," he said.
"It embitters thrf'mlnd, hardens the heart,
causes nnhapplless" and fear and suffer
ing. " 'There's nothing like adversity," a
millionaire once said ' to. me 'tjiem's
nothing like adVerslty to Wing - a, man
'Yes, I replied, 'out at the elbows".' "
Trust Companies Nt to lllnnir.
NBW YORK, Jan. U.-To the Boitor ot
Tho Ilee: My attention haS been called
to an edltoriat In n recent Issue of The
lien In which the stntemnt BPpars tnat
trust companies precipitated the panic of
1OT7 and that It Is a favorite device ot
promoters to disguise thclf questionable
or speculative operations UmW the title
of "trust company "
I am sure that Tho Uee Wishes to
bo absolutely fair and Just toward all
kinds of bunking or financial Institution!
which are safely managed and porfornt
legitimate services In tho communities
where they aro located. It Is true that in
years gono by. numerous "fnko" Invest
ments and speculative enterprises were
promoted by so-cnlled 'trust companies."
Such disguises were used specially In
states where no adequate laws had been
provided defining the kind- of business
which a chnrtered trust company may
cngago In and. where no state supervision
had been provided. There aro still a num
ber of states, notably Delaware' South
Dakota, Arliona and Illinois wnere the
laws afford loopholes for unscrupulous or
sneculatlvclv Inclined men or syndicton
to mislead tho public by using such titles,'
But the field of their operations Is being
narrowed down and within the last -ew
years systematic work has been done
under the direction ot the committee on
nrotectlve laws of tho trust company
section, American Bankers' association,
which prevents tho misuse of the uue.
"trust company" and provldesi proper su
pervision In the different states.
There Is still much misconception on i
the status and kind of business conuuiacu
hv bona fldo trust companies In this coun
try. Let mo briefly give you some figures
recently complied. There nro over l.iW
,hnriri nnd successful trust companies
lit tho United States. Of this number l,8Tt
.T.mA .in last, reported commneu oaim
Ing resources of $3,W,570,000. which W
nunl to 23 ner cent of the total banking
power of the nation. In addition to theso
banking resources tho trust companies
hold In their custody as trustee or execu
tor under wills and In the administration
of estates and execution ot various per
sonal trusts, largely In bohalt ot aeccaiei
n.i,u. nroDortv and funds amounting In
.nJltft in S7.&OO.O0O.OM. In addition to this
tho trust companies act as trustees under
rnrnoratlon mortgages where tney nom
the security for Issue of bonds nnd stocks
nrntM-Hnn nf Investors, or hi
fi.rni nirents In reorganizations and re
celvorshlps. etc., the vast amount of
I'S 000.O00.OS0 worth of security and cor-
poratlon.propcrty subject to mortgages o-
i etnn'dK in reason that If corporations
and Individuals entrust over J30.O0O.OW.0OO
worth of property equal to one-iounn
the combined wealth of the nation, to
trust company managements that they
,-nntnln superior elements of safety nnd
i-Kiinhllltv. What Is moro to the point
is this. 1. e.. that within tho last fifteen
years there wore only three failures of
trust companies which Involved any loss
to trust funds or property.
1 do not profess t6 have an intimate
knowledge with financial conditions in
Nohraskn. but It appears to me. In the
light of trust company Influence In other
tnees. that Nebraska legislators pursue
a mistaken policy In not considering
moro seriously the advisability of fram
ing up-to-'date laws providing for trust
company Incorporation. Tust companies
not only help to keep local surplus funds
nrofltabtv employed,, but are moBi in
fluential In attracting Investment capital
from other sections. They offer a better
milium for the administration pf cs
tates ot thoso men and women In Ne
braska who wish to protect their kins
folk In the event of their death.
Finally. f In regard to tho statement
that trust companies precipitated the
panic ot 1907. When tho frightened de
positors of a big New York trust company
besieged Its door on a certain fateful day
they were met with the posted notice,
signed by the superintendent of the statu
banking department, announcing that an
examination had been made of the com-'
pany and that It hai been found solvent
The fright of the depositors was not
cnused by any suspicion directed pre
viously against tho trust company, but
to tho exposure of Vicious operations of
gtoups of chain bank promoters. Sub
sequent events havo proven the Injustice
of this action. The trust company .not
only reopened Its doors, paid off hit Its
credits In full with Interest, but Is to
day one of the strongest and most con
servatlvcly managed trust companies In
Tho "money trust" Inquiry'., aa well as
the strain upon our banking resources,
caused by the requirements for moving
the bumper crop ot 1912, both afford ex- j
cellent proof that the blame for nny
evils that exist In bank or trust company 1
management is not duo to deliberate mis
use of credit or banking power, but to
the retroactive character and defects of
our national monetary system. Theso can
only be cured by rational legislation.
C. A. LUHNOW,
Publisher Trust Companies Magazine,
"I see they are trying In Politics to rc-
vlo the Jetferwonlan simplicity."
les. nnd the first thing thev know
they will find It turned Into a Thompson
Ian sweat." Baltimore American.
Yes. said thn nld man. ! find niv
strength Is falling somewhat. I used to
waiK around the block every morning,
but lately I feel so tired when I get half
way around I have to turn and come
back." Woman's Home Companion.
"es: 1 had to pwenr off."
"It wns time. After cMtltic nftv Intn
the house t dullberatelv nwnkr mv wlfo
to ask her the name of the song I was
nunnning. vvnrn a man gets that way
Its time to quit," Washington Star.
Hamlet had lust hin lilt hv
storage egg. Whereupon he turned
gravely to his audience.
"How trtllv SDokn the cnnt Mnrrvlln"
quoth ho. "Something Is rotten In the
state of Denmark'" Hiirper's Weekly,
LINES TO A LAUGH,
j fully covered h Insuran- e Philadelphia
"U'hy do you want a now trial?"
"On the gtounAs of newly discovered
evidence. Your Honor."
"What's the nature or It?"
"My client dug up 400 that 1 didn't
know he .had." Louisville Courier-Journal.
"Why, old man, your face Is badly'
"Yep. Horizontal hatpin."
"Hut I thought you kept such a sharp
lookout for them?"
"I do. But this was hidden by a
horizontal feather." Cleveland Plain
"I'm orrv in tnll vrn, mum ilm) IMi l
leaving you next week. I'm going to get
ma tried , -
That so. Emma? Wlm la thn tnrkv
'He s a pollcenitn. mum. On this hent.
That's fltw. I wish you joy. And what
Is his nnulo?" ' r
"i don t know yet, mum. hut his num
ber Is J1S." Detroit Free Press.
"John." Hiinnneil Mrs. Dhrklnn. "iln vnu
know what I think of a man who vwlll
go to, sleep while his wife Is talking to
'1 believe I do. Maria." drowsily an
swered Mr. Dorklns. "Hut don't let that I
stop you; ko ahead and get It off your
Whereupon ho went to sk-en acaln.
'Brown rot off a ereat mother-in-law
Joke the other night."
"That so? What was It?"
"He said he wns verv fond of her.t'
Detroit Free Press.
Blobbs-Do you think the death of old
ninUAflst n.ltl I,., a In., (n I a nnrvtm il ,-
....-.a.nt ..... n luro wc ..viiiiiiuiiii ,
Slobbs well, 1 rnderstfuid tho Iobs is I
Chicago News. v
I'm ror patient. loving woman, wnetmr
mean or rich of gown.
She Is on the road to glory and you Just
can't keep her down!
There's my little wife, Itoxana: she's n
artless as pan b4." . ,
Pile I. not 3V PilllHir, iiiniR juu, .-.i.v
she gets the best of met
If you try to best a woman, when dls'-
She'll come bobbing up In triumph like a,
. . . i ... . .
Then before you've time to meet her with'
a BeriiitJii un nvi uuuiu,
She'll have floored you with an adjective
and chased you from tho room!
Though you try to stop her progress,, put;
her momently to rout.
With her logic she'll attack you. knock
you down and drag you out!
Man has sense, but woman senses of a
kind to cause dismay, :
And can tell a man's chief weakness
when he's half a mile away.
She can scent a winter bargain with the
cunning of the fox.
And beat all her male contenders to the,
shop by twenty blocks!
That Is why I bow to woman, noble, pure
and sweet withal
Bow before her gentle wisdom, kneel and
knuckle, aye. and crawl'
T gave up smoking to please her."
"Now she la) s she llivds mc Vry untu
tvibSlin ' v
Here and There
Direct trains from Key West to Cuba
aro promised. ,
MUsourl's state debt Is On
the first ot the Venr there was SWSS1.S?)
In the state treasury to tho -credit of
various state funds.
A declstpn of the New York stute court
of appeals restricts loan shark Interest
rates to $ per cent per annum.
Four more national bird reservations
were established by the United (Hate
government last year, making the total
The ice trust rises superior to the sea
sons. If there Is an open winter the sum
mer price will be high because there was
no Ice to store. It we have xero weather
It Is too cold for the men to work and
only a small crop can be housed.
The predicted 115.000,000 cost of battle
ships haa been reached, according to the
testimony of the chief naval constructor
before the house naval committee. Laat
year congress appropriated on a basis uf
about m,WO,00 per ship, a few years
ago It Was about M.000,000. and not so
very far back the figure was around
Tho weather bureau, Washington,'" Is
extondlng Its' service by sending to the
larger cities reports of wenjher condi
tions' In certain foreign places which ahtw
what Is happening on the Atlantic Plaoes
Included are In' Iceland, Faroe island,
Scotland, Ireland, Bngtand. Germany,
(France. Portugal, the A cores, Oemiuda
anl tlie et lnil.cn.
Washington Post: Governor Wilson !
wants Mr- Taft to ride back frorn the '
capltol with him, as ho hasn't finished
the guide book yet and doesn't want to 1
run the risk of getting lost. I
Indianapolis News: Having baffled
the ball givers, tho presldent-olect now
admits that he could get along nil right
without even a reception and you really
can't blamo him for feeling that way
Washington Herald: Judging by the
way some Washington society women
aro v sidestepping the. parade. Miss Mil
holland's claim to be the most beautiful
suffragette seems to have been a tactical
Philadelphia . Bulletin: New Jersey
friends of Governor Wilson !' he will
be greeted with the Princeton college
cry when he reaches Washington on
March X but- his Virginia sup
porters say they aro going to meet him
with the rebel yell. The cheer leaders
ought to get together.
New York Times: So fur as has been
reported the only 111 result In Wash-
lngton of the abandonment of the In
augural hall Is a large overstock of white !
kid gloves In the shops. This Is not a '.
serious matter. In the course of a ,
winter a very large supply of white kid
gloves must be consumed in Washington.
and the fashions in gloves, even for
women, dq not change mueh from year I
to year. If the shops were oversuppllrd '
with ready-made ball dresses of approved
1S patterns the shopkeepers would com
mand our sympathy,
Watch the Folks Rush
Tonight's Spaghetti Night
You never served a dish more
welcome more appetizing
more nutritious than Faust
Spaghetti. There's practically
no end to the ways Faust
f Spaghetti can be served all
'hi savory, rehshable and satisfy
w ing. Far cheaper than meat
much more strengthening and
easier digested. You should
give the children a whole
at least twice a week it's a mus
cle, bone and flesh builder. "Ask
yourdoctor. Faust Spaghetti
is made from Durum wheat,
which is extremely rich in gluten
the food content that makes
for strength and growth. Write
for free recipe book and learn
how many dishes you can make
of Faust Spaghetti.
At all grocers'-
Sc and 10c
'rmt nn i
St. Louis, Mo.
Fast, Solid, Electrlc-Llghttd,
Gfiroagf) Grain eftht
frev Chicago tsd St. Leak
Through obttrntlon-com-ti Illinois Central Dally
partmeat an jrawtna-roomWL, Chicago 8.15 p.m.
LvSt. Loult.... ill. 20p.m.
At Birmingham. 4.18 pjn.
Central of Georgia '
Ar Columbus . . ,9.40 pa.
Ar Albany 1.15 Sum.
Atlantic Coast Urn
alMolna. cars, free reclining.
choir car (staol construction)
and coach (also tourist sleep
Ina car on 1st and id Tues
day of ths month) between
Chicago and Jacksonville.
sleeping cv and (reechaircar
St. Louis to Jacksonville.
AH meals In dining care.
Connection at Columbus with through sleeping car
to and from Savannah: also at Jacksonville for all
points in Florida, and with trains maVing
STEAMSHIP CONNECTIONS FOR HAVANA, CUBA
Information about Florid Winter Tourist fares, and Homeseekers' fares
on the 1st and 3d Tuesday of the month; alu information as to tourist
ticket and Illinois Central service to New Orleans, Vkksburg (National
Military Park), Hot Springs, Ark., Havana, Panama and Central American
points via New Orleans; Mexico and California points via New Orleans;
as well as reservation, tickets and descriptive literature, can be obtained
of your home ticket agent, or by addressing
S. NORTH, DitL Passenger Agtat, ILLINOIS CENTRAL R, R,
407 South 16tk St. Oauka, Net.
DRS. MACH & HACH
Successors to Salle? ft Mach
Tbe largest and beat equipped dental
office Id Omaha. Experts In charge of
all work, moderate prices. Porcelain,
fillings Ust IJKa the tooth All instruy
rnenip iBniicu .nor uauiK
3d Zloor Fasten Bloc. Omaha, 3Tab..
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