THE BEE: OMAHA, MONDAY, AUGUST 19, 1912. The Omaha" daily bee FOUNDED BY EDWARD. ROSEWATER VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR. . ... BETE BUILDING. FARNAM AND 17TH. Entered at Omaha Postofflee aa second class matter. rrpua nv annsnilPTION". Sundav Bee. one year $J-W Saturday Bee. one year -11-60 Daily Bee (without Sunday) one year-M-OO Daily Bee and Sunday, one year 16.00 DELIVERED BY CARRIER, Evening Bee (with 'Sunday). '-per in.. 25c Daily Bee (Including Sunday, per mo.foc Dally Bee (without Sunday), per mo.. 45c Address all complaint or Irregularities In delivery to City Circulation Dept. ' REMITTANCES. Remit by draft, express or postal order, payable to The Bee Publishing company. Only 2-cent stamps received in payment of small accounts. Personal checks, ex cept on-Omaha and eastern exchange,. nut accepted.' OFFICES. ' .. Omaha The Bee building. South Omaha 2318 N St. . .' ; Council Bluff 7 Scott St., "f ;. - i Uncoln-2 Little building. Chicago-1041 Mirqueite building. Kansas City-Reliance building. ' New Yortt-34 West Twenty-third. Wahlngton-T25 Fourteenth St., N. w. .. CORRESPONDENCE. Communications relating to news and editorial matter should be addressed Omaha Bee, Editorial Department. JULY CIRCULATION. 51,109 State of Nebraska, County of Douglas, ss. Dwlght Williams, circulation managed of The Bee Publishing company, being duly sworn, says that the average dally circulation for the month of July, 112, was 61.109. DWIOHT WILLIAMS. I Circulation Manager. Subscribed In my presence and sworn to before me this Sd day of August, 1912. . (Seal.) ROBERT HUNTER, ! " Notary Public " Brfbscribers leaving the . city i temporarily aboutd have, The Bee mailed to them. Address I will be) chanced aa of te as re- f quested. ' i : Thee old settlers' picnics are great rejuvenators; I At last accounts King Corn was doing tolerably well. Whle abolishing the veto power, why not also abolish the pardoning power? ' '.. The new Chinese republic knows that the United States Is the place to come for expert advisers. . The old guard In the printers' na tional convention seem have run the ink. roller over the Insurgent chaps. Governor Wilson's tariff speech at Gloucester, surely ought to be bour bon enough for even Colonel Wat terson.' .. : If somebody would haul a few ' chairs - dawn , to . Armageddon ' he ; might gather' a few coins renting out 'seats;. . "Britain Abandons Protest.", Oh, Joy,, good Johnny. Bull Is going to let , Uncle Sammle use his canal ' after all. " ; -:- 1 ;i 1 " Every conventloner who comes to Omaha goes away a friend, because Omaha understands the art of being the convention host. v. East St.-Louis has adopted the ex periment of trying white offenders before negro Juries. Been having too many,' acquittals, jao doubt.' ' Democrats in the house may have pujled.lhe wool bill over the presi dent's veto, but they nave pulled no wool over the peoples' eyes. ; Governor Johnson of California, bis friends say, wlll'dellver 59.600 "red" votes In Los Angeles. , Those third termers Just insist on ,a color line. ' Eugene.' V.- Debs comparative' sil ence doubtless means that tje is put to it to think of something to say since that "confession of faith" came out. f ; The real trouble with the piece of (ground adjoining the Deaf an4 Dumb ! institute, for. purchase of which the legislative appropriation has been al lowed to lapse, must be that it, Is not located In Lincoln. ' Governor Wilson and other, demo crats may. now. wish tq know, what it was Mr. Hearst had in ,m,ifc4 to, say when, upon t the close of the Balti more convention,.- he announced he would support nominees , and plat form.. .r. - ' Seeing It was a. police raid It gets only meager mention; under unob truslve hsaaiines. ' Had the raid ben conducted 'byour great reform demo cratic' sheriff- It would have covered the' whble"?ront page.. Great game this. V;;; , ,.' , ; U'e are pleased to note an account ; of a base ball game In an interior Ne braska town between the "Mutts and : Jeff ("iand Ue:8l!k' Hat . Harrys." but cannot "', understand how the : "Mutts" should have come out with ,the small .end of the score. j'LV ,' f If the veto power is such' a bad thing when, vested in a president, it cannot be any better when vested In a governor. Another amendment to : the constitution of Nebraska to de iprlve, the executive of participation ' in legislation must be in order. Please Explain. In his Gloucester address to as sembled farmers, Woodrow Wilson as democratic standard-bearer came out flat-footed for parcels post, prac tically ihe first really definite propo sition to which he has committed himself. He did not talk about an experimental parcels post, or a partial parcels post, but advocated a parcels post that, would enable men to ship their goods, large and small, from one end of the continent to the other. This kind of," parcels post, says Woodrow Wilson, Is part of the dem ocratic program. If so, an explana tion is due from some democrats in these .parts who have been helping the' express companies block the par cels post - Wnat lias Senator Hitchcock, and his 'democratic newspaper organ, to offer in explanation? What has the democratic congress man from this district, and the other democratic congressmen from Ne braska, to present in extenuation of their opposition? . . ' If the democratic program Includes a thorough and-efflcient parcels post, as Governor Wilson says it does, he has work ahead to convert his own democratic, crew. Omaha as a Manufacturing Center. The. importance of Omaha strictly as a manufacturing center is well emphasized in the,-state labor com missioner's report showing that 294 exclusively1 manufacturing concerns pay in i wages $5,088,696 a, year. They employ 5,976 men and boys and 1,960 women and girls, but only fifty-nine of these employes are under 16 years of age. That In It self is a most remarkable showing, because It proves how consistently Omaha manufacturers are living up to the letter and spirit of the state child labor law. The labor commissioner in his compilation has excluded many en terprises that under a free construc tion might be classed as manufac tories', selecting only those that come under this head exclusively. He finds that In such Omaha has an aggregate capital Investment of $27,- 006,725; that It consumes $15,806, 953 in materials yearly with an out put amounting to $35,456,241 a year.- - ,-. , ' , V In this as in bank clearings. Omaha takea a front rank among cities of Its class: In bank clear ings it stands sixteenth, surpassing most cities of Its size, since it ranks thirty-sixth in population, consider ing only Us corporate , limits. So here Is the Gate City of the west, overlooking the most fertile fields for the' treaty cereals, In the very heart of the, corn belt and. one of the three livestock markets of the world, claiming still greater distinc tion as a, coming ' manufacturing center. ;;- . . ,V", . , v The Southern1 Neffro. The ' churlish treatment of the southern negro by the new political party draws attention to tha colored man of the south and Invites new in quiry Into his life and progress. It makes him rather a conspicuous sub ject Just v now f: and therefore a glimpse" at what he Is doing' for him self and the community should in terest all. : .-;' '?'''., , ' In eleven southern states ' there are sixty banks owned' and conducted by negroes. They, in connection with four - other - negro banks, located, respectively in Chicago and Spring field, 111.; Philadelphia and Boston, do an annual business of about $20, 000,000, But, while southern ne groes are becoming banker and phy sicians and teachers, merchants, pub lishers and manufacturers, their chief-, industry, and their chief ad vancement .- . are In agriculture, whither Booker. T. Washington and other pivotal ben of the; race have sought to lead them. The government census reports show a phenomenal increase in the agricultural wealth of the southern negro from 1900 to 1910.' ' Their aggregate farming property In creased from $177,404,688 to $492, 898,218,,. or 177 per cent,; 1n that decade. ' They now own a combined area of 20,000,000 acres of farming and timber-land, or 31,000 square miles, an area equal almost to that of ; , Vermont, ' ? New. 'Hampshire, Massachusetts Connecticut , and Rhode - Island put together the whole of New England except Maine. The total wealth of the negroes js estimated at' $700,000,000. y 'Any, man with a nice regard for the truth and the rights of others, must be cautious how he disparages a race of men who have risen in less than half a ceniury from slavery to an estate of such iiuenigent thrift and industry, as , this.' ; Personal am bition or political expediency be comes a very mean f motive. If it prompts such disparagement. The colonel would have us believe' that (he eagerness of "Boss" Flinn 1 to devote unlimited work and wealth to the bull moose cause Is in no day due to expectation oMavors" to i come, , If "Boss" Flinn were trying 'to help elect Taft or Wilson, how ,ever, he would, of course, be inspired 'solely by the consideration of some corrupt deal.- - - . . , Jane Addams explains her enlist meat in the bull 'moose ranks by say ing that the platform pledges about every reform she has been working for. When the door was slammed in the face of the negro delegates from the south. Miss Addams protested that this. discrimination did not fit In with the promise of a square deal and absolute Justice between man and man,. The chances are that the platform promises would not fit In with ' actual performance were the new party ever to be called on to delivers - '.. : THAT BULL MOOSE CONVENTION ;'. SEEN THROUGH SOCIALIST EYES Fred D. Warren in the Appeal to easoa "ote for mi and save the country from socialism." This was the message delivered by Theodora Roosevelt to the men and women who had fathered from all parts of the United States in the Coliseum at Chicago to hear from his lips the remedy he proposed for the evus existing In our social and Industrial so ciety. Through the courtesy of our com rados of the Chicago Evening World, I had a seat in the press gallery and within a few yards of Mr. Roosevelt during the entire proceedings of the second day. , Roosevelt is not an orator, nor has he a pleasing personality, -ome may think this statement biased because of my rather unpleasant experience with tho gentleman. However, I will say that for nearly two hours he held the close at tention of the vast audience while he read from the manuscript his carefully prepared ''keynote address" of the pro gressive party. There was an expect ancy on the part of the audience that was very plain to- the observer. And therein lies the significance of the Coli seum meeting and the formation of the progressive party. Here were approx. Imately 10,000 men and women, most of whom had been life-long republicans, rep- resenting several million men and wo men of like mind. Here were old men who had witnessed the beginning of the party of Lincoln, here were young men who had been nurtured on the doctrine that the republican party was a sort if divine institution that Ooa In his Infinite .wisdom, had ordained to look after the affairs of mankind here in the Unted States. Tet thess one-time republicans publicly approved of Roosevelt's attempt to wreck the g. o. p. and they had gathered in Chicago to assist In the work. . . It Is true here were man smug poli ticians who had failed to land jobs under the Taft administration; here also were aspiring statesmen who saw in the move ment an opportunity for pelf and posi tion; but if I am any Judge of human nature, the majority of the delegates present were In earnest In their desire to bring about better conditions. The ex pectancy depicted on their faces when Roosevelt started to speak remained after he had finished. The vast crowd was vis ibly diaappointed when he announced that this was his "confession of faith." These people had expected a strong dec laration of principles and a clean-cut program , suggesting , a remedy for the evils which all recognised existed; In stead, Roosevelt handed them his "con fession. " The reporter sitting next to me, who was visibly bored during the entire address, allowed Ms pencil to aimlessly wander over the paper pad on his desk and this Is what the Idle pencil wrote: "Platitudes! Platitudes!" The applause which started on th appearance of Roosevelt, after the first five minutes, was desultory and inter mlttant . and kept alive for fifty-seven minutes only by a cleverly Dre-arranfirA.1 program. At those points In this "great popular outburst of enthusiasm," when the noise got pretty thin, the colonni stepped to the front of the 'platform and waved his red bandana vigorously. This was the signal for another round. At other times the band would play, ably seconded by the drum and fife corps imported for the occasion. At the psyohologlcal moment a orocession of no tables and aspirants for fame marched down the aisles' and were lifted "to the platforms, where, in full Mew e-f the as semblage, they pledged their allegiance to the standard bearer of the progressive party. This kept the applause going for thirty minutes, stretching the time in an to fifty-seven. Without Intending to be funny, I can assure the readers of tha Appeal there were, a'.l told, fifty-seven varieties of enthurtasm oa this occasion, but at the end cf .the long drawn out hour, the crowd refused to waste any more time In foolishness. ' Most ef these people wers here In real earnest and they were anxious t see the start of ' the steam roller that was to mow down the oppressors Of the common people and establish the reign of Justice In this trust-ridden country. But In this they were sadly disappointed, and the disappointment was visible on pi faces of delegates and spectators alike. Hree was the occasion and here the need but their favorite bad fallen down lamely at the very beginning of the race...Jt Is true, he advanced Ideas which tie himself admitted were radical in the extreme, but a majority of those who heard him were familiar with all these radical measures through thf ir contact with socialist litera ture. They i had heard Roosevelt de nounce, in his characteristic way, thee same measures and they were preplcxea and puzzled at bis sudden change. 'Tiie majority of the delegate oh the floor of the convention were In the middle class small business men, ' merchants, manufac turers, land owners (but no working men and no tenant farmers). They were struggling against the 'octopus on the one side and what they conceived socialism to be on the bther. How Mr. Roosevelt was to accomplish the Impossible feat of protecting big business 'and saving the nation from socialism by adopting planks from the socialist platform was a prob lem they could not solve and they waltel In vain for Roosevelt to make plain to them how he would work this wonder. In these columns I have told you of my belief that Roosevelt Is to be the central figure In this campaign. Shrewd, unscrupulous and without the sllghest sense of political honor, he has seized upon and made his own many of the planks Incorporated in the social. 1st platform, which have been popular ized by hard work and self sacrifice on the part of the socialists of the United States. Unless Vigorous measures are taken by . the Appeal army and the socialist party, we will see. In this cam paign, the fruits of our endeavor tem porarily swept aside. Roosevelt is am bitious to be the Bismarck of the United States. He proposes to kill the socialist movement by pretending a conversion to some of Its radical measures and to sweep Into power on the' crest of the wave of unrest that now threatens to engulf the capitalist system.' Louis XVI, vainly tried' the same tactics. "With the unlimited millions back of him, furnished by the Perkinses and the MoCormlcks, he will be able to carry on a campaign that will carry millions of men off their feet, and It would bs a miracle if some of those who have today made up their minds to vote the socialist ticket at the coming election were not carried with the tide. The setback win be only temporary, every socialist knows ' that and In the and if we do npt loss our heads and become discouraged and disheartened t"we will in , turn .reap 4 where Roosevelt Is now sowing!" ' . .. . .... l.,.. . . , FOOD SHORTAGE AND HIGH PEICES Thrift and Industry and Better Methoda of Soil Culture, New Tork Tribune. . .. - i -.... ' It Is now and then said that the food production of the United, States Is de creasing relatively to the population. That statement is ' not to be too im plicitly accepted, not yet hastily rejected. In some particulars there certainly Is such a deorease, as in wheat, ye and meats, "in others there Is probably an Increase, ss In corn, oats and potatoes. It is quite possible that there Is on the whole a net decrease. If so, the inevita ble result of a continuation- of that process Is obvious. Moreover, in addi tion to the diminution of supply, there is a steady Increase In the cost of produc tion. The average value of , farm land has more than doubled in ten years. The vast free ranges on which Innumerable herds of cattle were raised cheaply are rapidly disappearing, and the supplies of our meat markets must more and more be raised In fenced fields and in stables. All these conditions inevitably tend 4 to ward higher prices. Perhaps the most significant feature of the case, which at once explains the cause of the comparative scarcity of the Ameri can food supply and suggests the remedy, is hinted at In the name and character of the organisation at whose meeting the forebodings of famine wers made. Lack of fertility, or at any rate lack of pro ductivity, is the chief fault. It is a statis tical fact that bur average yield of wheat to the acre Is less than half the yield in many European countries. Hera It Is about U.i bushels ' In England ,!t Is SL5 and In Scotland more than 39. Our yield of oats Is 83 and Qreat .Britain's more than 40 bushels.. We raise only 22 bush els of barley to 83. In tbe United King dom, and 94 bushels of. potatoes to about 200. It Is. true that, o;r averages are higher In. some of the older eastern and middle states, where conditions are more like those in Great Britain; than in the United States as a whole,, but nowhere are they as high as in tbe United King dom. ' ; 'j V'..'. '. ' -if. It is not too much to say. then, that the solution of tha problem of high prices, not to mention that of protection against actual scarcity, Is to be found in such thrift and industry 'and improvement bf methods as will increase the .productivity of our soli to something like .the standard Of other countries. If we could produce wheat and potatoes here as abundantly aa they do In England our crops of those two great staples would be doubled at a stroke. And surely we should not be willing to confess that we cannot do as well as other nations which In natural conditions are less favored than we. ' CHEERY WORDS P0R HAY FEVERITES Cause of Their Trouble Pointed Out and Stigmatized, v . ti Washington Post. The iridescent Ingalls paid a tribute to grass which made tha flowers hide their diminished heads, and Bully Bottom went on record to the effect that "Good hay, sweet hay . hath no fellow.", . In sDlte of thee certificates of character. the grateful herbage of the meadows has fallen into disrepute because' the mowing season coincides, with that- Au gust peatllence, hay fever. The real truth has long been estab lished, and let It again be proclaimed. The ragweed, that known offender, has matured In the fields and hedges, and sffUcted humanity greets the malicious tatterdemalion with a tributary sneexe. With the punctuality of an eclipse, the delicate membranes respond to the titil lating touch of the drifting .pollen. The most amiable of men-good husbands and tender fathers become as misanthropes and hate mankind. Like the ancient recipe tor getting rid of nut-grass, the only remedy Is to move away., and so they flee like a bird to the mountains, green and white. The science of medicine has wrestled successfully with many of the graver diseases. It Is drowning the rat that raises the flea that spreads the bu bonic plague It Is destroying the pool" that : hatch the eggs that produce the mosquitoes that propagate yellow Jack. But before the annual visitation of hay fever It stands Impotent and abashed. No prophylactic measures can overcomp the flaunting ragweed , In Its dog-day madness. The fellowship of misery Is doing what U can to lighten tbe burden of the hay fever season. The victims have organ ised a national association and estab lished a periodical for the .exchange of experiences. All the secret places which promise relief are searched nut and re ports are duly made. But It Is one of tie perversa eccentricities ef -the dis ease that .the sanctuary jn .which . one victim. Is immune has no effect, on an. other patient. Localities that chase away b-y . fever, - proper., only , Intensify Its pathological., jn-laws,. ros fever and peach fever. . The harpy haven of one season becomes the- breeding g-oond of affliction In -some following ynr. Sneez ing, trumpeting as he goes, the Unhappv exile wanders up and down the -earth like some restless Salathtel branded with a curse. Perhaps, In sober truth, the area of Immunity is more constant and mors extensive, than .the low-spirited mem bers of the national organisation - lead us to believe, but the fact remains that the-' man who shall make only one blade of ragweed grow where tw grew be fore, or shall otherwise stamp out the malady which mars the Joys -of 'August, will deserve to take hlen rank among the benefactors of mankind. - Scfewo- Aernti Perplexed,. Pittsburgh Dispatch. - The researches of government sef en tlsts as to the cause ef the holes to Sweitier kasa may be more' fruitful than the ponderings of the famous philosopher over the holes In doughtnuts. Neither problem Is1 so Insoluble;, howeveXi as the tough one presented to a passing Investi gator as to how the eajf goC. through the- auger- hole .in ttt door Jamb -to which Its tall wis affixed. ThbDMliiOmalia 3 . O' k. COMPILED PROM TlVK-a AUGUST Iff. Thirty Years Ago Home talent won all around on the diamond field, the U.' P.'s beating the Waboo nine, 14. to S, at their association park. Tommy Wilson, pitcher for the second U. P. nine, pitched the flret six Innings, and" then gave .way to Dorr, while Bandle caught through the game. The umpire Wfis John P. Lord. At the B. & SI. grounds the St Louis Reds were pounded put by 14 to 4. Dur- kee and Brandt was the home battery, and Mr. Mayo of Lincoln umpired. There was a good attendance at .the Omaha Driving park to witness the gen tleman's roadster race, 'for which the entries were: Henry Hornbergers "Prince," F. A. . Nash's "Canada Girl," Sam Record's "Little Dave.." and Nell Fitch's "Gypsy Girl." "Little Dave" took the purse. . , Weather prophets say that two months of hot weather may be looked for this fall. . Grading on the B. ft M. dump has progressed so far that the frame of the new freight house is already up. The birthday of Miss Mattle Polack the 8-year-old daughter of Mr. A. Polack, was celebrated by a general gathering of her friends at her home. ; ' ' The plcnlo at Hanscom park under the auspices of the Ancient Order of HI bernlans was a great success. The Burns club plcnlo gave a gala day to the Scottish lads and lassies. In the girls' running racs the prize takers were Kate Liddel, Ira Innings and Belle Mel gram. William Falconer was floor man ager for ths dance. T. W. - T. Richards and Miss Birdie Richards left for. Denver. Mr. F. A. Nash, for so long connected with the t".' P., has sccepted the posi tion Of general agent for the C, M. ft St. P. at Council Bluffs and Omaha, and will take his new place the first of the month. Twenty Tears Ago - Rev. . Marlals Richards, formerly of tha Chicago Theological seminary, ac cepted a call to the Welsh Presbyterian church In Omaha, Twenty-fifth street and Indiana avenue. Third ward democrats met at 1120 Far- nam street and organised with these offi cers: President. Edward Cosgrove; vies presidents, C. Mansfield and D. Cosgrove; secretary, James A. Fogarty; treasurer, John Donovan; trustees, Gus Cary .and Ed Rothery- Mrs. J. R. Tilly departed for Radford, Va., in response to a telegram announcing the serious illness of her -daughter, Mrs. 3. T. Tilly, Jr. The Ladles' Aid society of the First Methodist church gave a farewell recep tion In the afternoon to Mrs. A. L. Strang, Soon to leave for Texas. The affair was a surprise to Mrs. Strang. Mrs. F. B. Bryant made an address conveying the feelings of the women upon losing one ef their most honored members and Mrs Strang responded. Tha Dourlas County Teachers' institute came to a close. There was an enrollment of 10i ten more than the previous year Ten. Years' Ago- "' ' ':' ' ". . Charles Edward Craln of Springfield, O., andMlss Emily .Doane Wakeley, daughter of Judge ani.Mrs. K Jikeiey, were married at the home of the bride's parents by , Rev. John Williams of , St. Barnabas church. Judge and Mrs. Wake- ley in their reception of the guests were assisted by Mr. and Mrs. Charles, ti. Craln, parents of the groom; Mr- , and Mrs. Lucius W. Wakeley of St. Louis, Mr .and Mrs. Arthur Wakeley of Omana and jrftia Wakeley. The bride was given away by her father and attended by Wlln Daisy Doane. Hundreds of Omaha Elks fllled the Bur lington station to welcome horns George P. Cronk, , the, nswly-elected grand .ex alted ruler. . .. Mrs. Martha Valentine, years old, mother of Miss Georgia Valentine, died. Samuel L. Branton, an old employs of the Union Pacific ahoj was laid. at. rest. His residence had been 1U North Nine teenth street. . - Thera was a report at Labor Tsmpio that the street car employes had per fected a local organization, 254 having Signed the roll and others wers coming w. Their national president, V.' D. Mahon of Detroit, was hers directing the move ment '' - -' People Talked About Ramon Escobel of Brownsville, Tex., who recently celebrated his" one ftundred an tenth birthday, says he Is Still a young man. His looks and actions would suggest a man of 0. Hiram Johnson, of California, on the Roosevelt ticket for vice president of the United States, Is the fifth. Johnson to have been designated for sveh a Candi dacy In the history , of this country's politics. v' .- . . Miss Alice Malone, who is manager -of a banking firm In Washington, has been elected a director and la said to be the first woman to hold such a post in the national capital. She Is also one of the best accountants In ths country, of whom there are five, equally expert. Edward Clark Of Atlantic City N. J., did not get the axe exactly In the neck, but an accidental clout of the Instru ment on the side of the head smashei a blood-clot that affectei his memory. His restoration to normal mental health hel?s to lift the, axe to the forefront of surgical tools. Mrs. William K. Vanderbllt has estab. llshed a home for girls in connection with the Big Sisters' society of New Tork, of which she Is the founder and leading spirit. The Big Slstere' society was suggested by the Big Brother move ment and alms to do for girls what the latter does for boys and with as little red tape. as possible. . r Lucy Stone, "the morning star of the woman's rights movement" was born on a farm near West Brookfleld. Mass., ninety-four years ago August 13. Her mother milked eight cows the night be fore Lucy was born and said regretfully, ef the new baby: "Oh, dear! I am sorry It Is a (lit A woman's life Is so hard." When Lucy Stone became a lecturer for the cause she had the hose turned oa ber. She .was deluged with, tee . watet, peppet was burned In tho halls and spltballs, books and all sorts of things were thrown at ber., In tho face of all- this , Lucy Btono fought down tha scoffers and lived to see tho crusade revolutionise woman's place . Is tha activities of : tha western world. f HOW TEE EDITORS SEE THINGS Cleveland Plain! Dealer: It is stated that Andrew Carnegie has Come out for a graduated income tax. He is ready to take his medicine with the rest-wlth the added prospect of one of the biggest doses. Indianapolis News: But even with all Mr. Perkin's vast resources it Is prob able that he will have to dteappolnt some enthusiastic converts to the belief that there Is great financial profit to be made out of playing the people-must-rule game. Baltimore American:' Some Indignant "bachelor girls" want to burn in effigy the Colorado minister who gained notoriety by a tirade against old maids. The conservation spirit of the day ought to show that It is wasting good powder to pay attention to attacks of this kind. Sioux Clty.Journal: Did you think the colonel couldn't reduce the cost of the necessaries of life to consumers without reducing the profits of the farmers? Wrong again. . The colonel charges responsibility for the high cost t'of food to ' the middlemen, and is going after them. The middlemen, it will be noted, are not so numerous as the consumers or the farmers. Philadelphia Record: Stubbs of Kansas appears to have won the primary nomi nation for the senate by a majority of the legislative districts, but not a majority of the voters. This sort of a victory ought to be most revolting to men like Stubbs and Roosevelt, who are terribly afraid that the action of the people on the government is not direct enough. On the popular vote, Stubbs is believed to be In a minority, which does not look as if Kansas were red hot for the progressives. But Stubbs will claim the nomination on the ground of carrying a majority of the assembly districts. This Is defrauding the people of their right to name the senator. WHITTLED TO A POINT. "I'm afraid there must be Insanity In your family." "Why. so?" "1 hear that your daughter jilted the man who runs the elevator In your apartment house to marry a poet." Satire.. Mrs. A.-Two lemon sodas, please, and you can put them on the account my hus band has here. Clerk Sorry, ma'am, but flss drinks are not charged. Boston Transcript. "My hat's in the ring, and my coat's off ' "Well, don't tear your shirt." Wash ington Herald. The Dorklns family had spent a month at a Summer resort. " " TaI. h m ...M 'Vra rtnrlHna with vrv tfUllII. wwu ... i -J. .(. ...... Indication of profound sorrow, "we'll have to stay here . another momn. nere s a frrm M .Tina And ah MVS ICkVQI . v.-lli ... . - 1 w tvi.v'v -tout nlled the street in front of Our; house!" Chicago Tribune. ..."How foolish you women are," said Mr. .1 til K,.n hair "V.-.H don't catch I men doing euch things as Joining Don t worry ciuds.- ."Of course not" snapped Mrs. Nagg. I "Men couldn't give up the pleasure of 1 worrying their wives." Baltimore Ameri- can. ' ' v . ' - Blngs I See a Woman has been cured of rheumatism by a stroke -of lightning. . Jings Tes. And the case differs front 1 so many surgical operations, announced ; as perfectly successful 1n that the patient ; is still allve.-Judge:' ; - Bill When a Japanese maiden desires i to show marked attention to her lover : she uses tbe sharpened point, of ne of her finger nails In writing to- him. Jill I suppose many a poor Jap has ; been "nailed" that way. Yonkers States- : man. . . ; ,f, . , , "Are v6u a narty boss?" ' "Certainly not," replied the local despot "I simply "' the boys how I am going to vote, and then tell them to vota aa they please. But heaven help them it they don't pleaeo to vote the way I da" Washington Star. "Here's an Item." observed Rivers, who was looking over the exchanges, "to the effect that the king of Sweden raises prise dogs on his farm." "I suppose he uses them," suggested Brooks, "to drive his Stockholm." After which the rattle of the typewriters broke out afresh with great violence. Chicago Record-Herald. THE SLAPSTICK MM. W. D. Nesbit in Chicago Post I don't care much for comedy or ths up lifting tort ' The epigram and repartee and gently, voiced retort; . , ! I can't say that I like the Jokes that leavo . so much to thought And do not bump against you in the fash-! ion that they ought That's why I always go to see, as often as I can A show that guarantees at least one lusty slapstick man. ... . - ... Tbe slapstick man! He never leaves you guessing for the point; He sets a fellow laughing till his verte f brae unjolnt Say, ain't it funny where he asks why: chickens cross the road And whacks It to his partner with that energetic goad? It does me good to see him swing that slapstick like a fan. And yell out, "Swow!" He's all the goods that funny slapstick man. And ain't It great where he sneaks up behind his partner's back Just when the show is getting tame, and comes down bard kerwhack? Then all the audience clap hands and cheer and stamp their feet And me? I laugh until I mighty near fall from the seat! Of course, the other actors do the best, perhaps, they can But as for me, I'd rather see a first-class slapstick man. Bl5BSaSB5SSa51g55B5E5BSg5BSa5a5E5HSrEgE5B5E5Bil Tw1y SptenAd-Truns daily between The Best of Everything SCHEDULES OMAHA TO CHICAGO Lv. Omaha 12.0S p. m. 6.00 p. m. 6.35 p. m. Ar. Chicago 6.45 a. m. 7.45 a. m. 8.30 a. m. Lv. Omaha ' 7.55 p.m. ' 8.50 p.m. 12.40 a.m. 7.40 aim. Ar. Chicago 9.10 a.m. 11.20 a.m. 1.30 p.m. 8.45 p.m. SCHEDULES CHICAGO TO OMAHA Lv. Chicago Ar. Omaha 9.30 a. m. 11.15 p. m. 6.05 p. m. 6.49 a. m. Lv. Chicago , 8.30 p. m. 10.16 p. m. 10.45 p. m. Ar. Omaha 9.10 a. m. . 12.30 p. m. - 3.28 p. m. All trains arrive at and depart from the new passenger terminaV Chicago t h moat perfectly appoint J railway ttation in th world. -1 The famous- double track, auto . matic safety signal line between ,' . the Missouri River and Chicago. . - Ticket Offices Chicago and ' NorthWestern Ry. 1401-1403 Farnam Street Omaha, Neb. KW841T Making the Personal Call by Wire Telegrams Open the Door ; : Marked "Private" A Western Union DAY LET TER or NIGHT LETTER will convey, all the essentials of a per sonal visit at a fraction of the . cost and in a fraction of the time. - ; Full Information and Rates by Telephone THE WESTERN UNION TELEGRAPH COMPANY