THE BEE: OMAHA, THURSDAY, JUNE 13, 1912.
4
;The Omaha dail.bee
BOUNDED BT EDWARD ROSE WATER
VICTOR ROSE WATER. EDITOR
.BEE BUILDING. FARXAM AND 1TTH
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MAY CIRCULATION.
50,421
State of Nebraska. County of Douglas ,ss.
- Dwight Williams, circulating manager
'of The Be Publishing company, being
iduly sworn, says that the average daily
.Insulation for the month of May, 1812.
was 60.CL ; DWlGHT WIlXlAMS. ,
-- H '. ClrculaUon Manager. ,
. Bubsrlbed..ln rnv' presence fcnd sworn
.to before me tbis.6U day of June, 1912.
(Seal.) , ' ' ROBERT HUNTER.
-'. Notary Public.
safascrlbers tearing the city
tewporarllr should hare Th
Bee mallet to them. Address
,' will be chanced as oftea as
r jsted.
June Juned up some Tuesday all
right.
' Poor court of commerce, we knew
'it well. "'"' . . ,
, ? ' Bobb Murphy Is umpire of the Em
pire state. v
r There seems tor be more gas than
steam 'rollers at Chicago!
Two aviators fall from a war aero
plane dead. No, not a success yet.
The sultan of Morocco's battng
average has fallen off until they
have benched him. .
John p. . says anyone can become
-' rich. Comparatively few seem to
' have found that out, though. '
- Our idea of the "Conquering Hero
Cornea" is the return of . the home
team from a victorious trip abroad.
Mr. Murphy has not yet Indicated
who will get New York's vote at
Baltimore. Hurrah for the Empire
state!
In spite of . to knockout blows
from Billy' Bungay,. the devil seems
to recover sufficiently to stay , in
the Ting. t r
Alaska's volcanic eruption scat
tered considerable dust, but it is
hopelessly . outclassed by Chicago's
outburst - ,
"Is Clark a Joke?" asks the Phil
adelphia Inquirer, referring to the
speaker. Evidently the silly question
season is on.
. It will be another tragedy if the
authorities fail to capture the fiends
who committed the human atrocity
at Vlilisca, la. .
la . citing various arguments in
favor of trades unionism, John
Mitchell might, with every claim of
.logic, point to himself.
"I want my country, which leads
la moat things, to lead In all things,"
said John Mitchell Which is a good
standard of Americas citizenship.
''Thr is. a buttermilk bond be
tween Colonel Roosevelt and former
Vic President Fairbanks that ought
to' count for something in this pre-
'conve&tion strife.
.Mr.. Croker denies the report of
his offer to adopt Annette Kellerman
-a hie" little Venus. Mr. Croker's ex
perience with .stars doubtless has left
him 'not' without wisdom. .
Democratic leaders and managers
retrain from entering the presiden
tialv competition with' dead-sure
daises, thus checking the bullish
iendency In the fiction market.
John I. Martin of St. Louis has
been a-sergeant-at-armg of demo
cratic national conventions much
longer , than ' any present day war-
horse can recall- without blushing.
. Two, hundred lives in all the na
vies of the world have paid for the
development of submarines ' in
dozen years. The peaceful pursuit of
Implements of war exacts a mighty
toll.; ::.:::s , , .
i, "You people out here remember
the anthracite coal strike .of 1902
because you" are still paying for it,"
said John Mitchell. . -What! Why our
coat dealers tell us prices have to be
Jept up to enable them to meet the
.ordinary- expense of doing business
' The "Meld prize of J 100 Offered by
.ha. Miisourl'iwlyersity for the best
' poem, submitted each year, by a na
ive author will lot be awarded this
fear.stJot one of the poems sub
mitted merited the money. For "the
present the noun', daw j grip on Pe
gasus Is unshakable..
. Come, Let Ug Reason -Together.
John Mitchell's appeal to labor
and capital, "Come now and let us
reason together," .is the last word in
the program of peace between em
ployer and employe. When both
sides sit 8wn to a quietr: reasoning
out of their issues, their problems
are solved. Xottiing can withstand
the light of reason. Nothing has
withstood it in all the world's his
tory. War, 'we say, has made prog
ress possible. War never did any
thing of the kind, without the com
plement of reason.
Israel was appealed to by Isaiah
for some of the very things for which
the prophet of reform is today ap
pealing to labor and capital "Learn
to do well; seek Judgment, relieve
the oppressed, Judge the fatherless,
plead for the widow."-Industrial er
rors of today, like Israel's sins of
old, will dissolve into right and Jus
tice under the burning light of
clear, dispassionate reason. Why
do more men not see that as clearly
as John Mitchell sees It and cease
holding good causes for petty pur
poses? ' Wood as Cuban Peacemaker.
While some doubt the expediency
of sending a peacemaker to Cuba, It
seems to be generally admitted that
if such a plan is pursued, Major Gen
eral Leonard A. Wood would be the
most available man- for the Important
office. He has been suggested by
the New York Herald and the sugges
tion - endorsed by members of con
gress. -
' General Wood's Iongf ' service as
military commander and later gover
nor, in Cuba gave him an insight Into
Cuban character and problems and a
following among- the people which
no other American seems to possess,
Therefore if wisdom arid expediency
prompt, such . a . course, . undoubtedly
General Wood would be the man best
fitted to arouse Cubans to the im
portance of preserving their inde
pendence. Senator Bacon of Georgia, how
ever, conceding this to General
Wood, believes the' best1 course to
take Is not to send a mediator to the
isla&d at all, but send troops suffi
cient to restore and maintain peace.
His idea Is that if it becomes fully
understood in Cuba that appeal to
military force n. the United States
can effectually be ' made, this will
serve invariably to suppress rebellion
and effect order. There ought to be
a time, however,' to which we might
look with spme degree of complac
ency, when Cuba could get along
without this Damoclean sword held
over the heads of its recalcitrants.
Congressional Humor. .
."Paths of glory lead but to the
grave'? invariably for the' men Who
achieve, distinction' a hutadrlsti 'in
congress.. The highway to fame is
strewn with many political remains
to lend melancholy testimony to that
tact. Only the most hazardous would
care for the "listening senates to
command" that way. v. We are quite
certain Senator Clark of Wyoming
would not.' Yet the senator runs a
flak when he exclaims, upon the floor
of the senate that "For the informa
tion and for the benefit of the gen
eral public" he would like to have
the constitution of the United. States
printed in the Congressional Record.
Of course the Congressional Rec
ord printed it.' It would print most
anything which a member In
good standing would ask. to have
printed. But there is such a hope
less gulf fixed between the cloistered
Congressional Record and the gen
eral public that If this were the only
means of ever getting the constitu
tion before the people we would have
to despair of the undertaking.' Sen
ator Clark's serious character is all
that saves him from the doom of the
congressional humorist's classifica
tion.
Protecting; the Gullible Public.
Uncle Sam has a hard time pro
tecting gullible) people against fakers.
Through the Postoffice department,
he did much to rescue them from the
gold brick mining stock .peddler and
now through the Department ' of
Agriculture, he is hastening to the
relief of the victim of land invest
ment fakers.
Publicity is the chief means the
government will employ in this res
cue work. Secretary Wilson will have
land investment frauds thoroughly
exposed through publicity, thus giv
ing prospective investors due warn
ing or wnat to expect. This is a
splendid' work,' in which the govern
rnent should have the hearty co-op
eration of every legitimate business
interest possible.
It is BBtonlshlng what enormous
swindles are practiced through the
land selling 'fakes.- In this ease, as
ln the case of good mining stock,
legitimate interests always suffer,
along with' those gullible persons,
who are disposed to bite on every
bait thrown toward them. The
Worst of iV is that' in spite of all the
government can do; enough easy prey
is usually left to make business
fairly good for the taker. . ,
The fact that Uncle Jud Harmon's
home county voted; : against shim in
the prjmary contest is fittingly sup
plemented by the action of Cincin
nati's progressive preacher in read
ing Jonah out of the, Bible. The
former Qtieen City takes its swallows
with modern trimmings,'. . '
SCHOOL DAYS IN EAELY OMAHA
VIII. Commencement Twenty-Five Years Ago,
BY VICTOR ROSEWATER,
Member of the Class of 1887 and Now Editor of The Bee
The commencement of 1&?7 was. It goes Elemental Genii." There were recitations
without saying, a great gala event There bV Vena w"' nd Ne,lle Bauserman,
were thirty of us to receive our diplo
mas, so many that for the first time It
became necessary to relect spokesmen
for the class for places on the program
instead of giving everyone a part. Three
boys managed to get through the com
petition with class records and com
mencement ipratlons that would pass
muster, the girls supplying the rest of
the entertainment. It Is interesting to
not the after careers of "the rising gen
eration reflected In the subjects. Wallace
Broatch. who later went to Yale, and then
to West Point, and Into the army talked
about "The American Army." Augustus
Detwller who studied at Johns Hopkins
and went through the medical school of
the University of Pennsylvania to be
come a practicing physician, delved deep
Into "The Genus Homo," while I seizing
upon the news value of Henry M. Stan
ley's penetration of Darkest Africa and
General Greeley's Arctic exploits, took
for my subject "Recent Explorations."
Tha girls essays on that commence
ment program are also worth mention
ing. Iowa Ball discussed "Charles and
Mary Lamb as Brother and 81ster," Car
rie E. Howell gave "A Study of Ralph
Waldo Emerson," Mary Ludlngton told
the story of "The Holy Grail," Amelia
Blumve's essay was on. "Our Black Fam
iliars, a Mld-wlnter Revery," Mabel Bal
combe's "The Italian Influence on Eng
lish Poetry," and Emily Dorn's "The
History of Chemistry as told by the
RACE WARS IN
- Fitful Contests of Black
Boston Transcript.
The black race and the white race meet
oftener than they mingle. Negroid ele
ments of population develop, but they
usually are socially semi-outcasts In
lands dominated by the Anglo-Saxon or
people of Teutonic stock. In Latin coun
tries there has been leBS race preju
dice than among Anglo-Saxons. Latin
people are commonly supposed to be
more tolerant, or at any event less ex
acting than Americans or Britons In the
matter of racial purity of blood. This
conception of the Latin attitude receives
a rude shock In Cuba, where we find the
people of the Island dividing on the color
n,.roe. yruiesung mat tney are
treated with rank Injustice because they
are negroes and the whites falling back
on the law of self-preservation as Juetl-
ficatlon for enacting the low forbidding
he organisation of political parties on
nv uama ol rtnco.
. The Cuban outbreak is by no means a
solitary instance of the difficulty ef keep
lng the two races at peace with one
another after a theoretical equality has
been established. Throughout the West
Indies one race or the other Is in pollt.
Ical ascendancy. In Haytl, as ln Santo
Domingo, the colored . people govern In
the right of s vast majority. In Haytl
the line has been drawn not alone on
color but on tint. The mulattoes are
tha liberal or progressive element; some
times without the co-operation of the
small white population they have been
In revolt against the sway of those whom
thV designate as "blacks." ' "Black wo-
mn, brown lady," Is a, social definition
and direction by no means limited to
Jamaica, even It It originated there.
; Jamaica Itself is dominated by negroes
and their descendants;- the whites are ln
4 minority that would be physically
powerless, but Is politically so well
organized and sd well dlreoted that with
ADVANCING LABOR LEGISLATION
The Federal Eight-Hour Day and Other Laws.
Springfield (Mass.) Republican.
The United States senate's passage of
the house bill extending the eight-hour
principle to air contracts involving labor
on government work calls attention to
the progress made in shortening the
working day in this country. Eight hours
have constituted a legal maximum of
labor In much of the public service of
the United States government for some
time, but only recently has there been a
marked, advance ln forcing private con-
tractors doing government Jobs to adopt
the same limitation. Steps In this dlreo-
tion were taken when the naval appro- and national, as it is presented ln a re
prlatlon act of last year was amended so cent bulletin of the federal bureau of
as to provide for the eight-hour day in
the construction of certain vessels and
bulls. And the postal appropriation act
provided that letter carriers should not
work more than forty-eight hours In six
working days of the week, except the
first five and the last fifteen days of
each year. The enactment of the bill
Just passed by the senate would seem to
mark the final victory of the labor or-
ganlzatlons in securing the adoption of
the eight-hour principle in all work for
the federal government.
At the same time. In the public ser-
vices or public works of the respective
states the elsht-hour 'principle has mado
progress. During the year 1911, New Jer-
sey enacted a law requiring that all em-
nlovM af the lata or men mnlavnd on
or In behalf of the State for any of Its
municlDalltiea or by contractors or ub-
contractors shaU not work more than
eight hours unless In emergency. In which
extra nv is to be allowed for overtime.
The Wisconsin statute was amended by
requiring that contractors must stipulate
the eight-hour day for workmen em
ployed thereunder" and . restricting "ex
traordinary emergency" to the protection
fit property or life from the public
enemy, fire, flood or storm. The Con
necticut statute now prescribes eight
hour? as the limit tor engineers, firemen
and mechanics employed In state institu
tions. In this state, the law now makes
the eight-hour day optional with munici
palities, but at the aame time It directs
the observance of the limitation upon
bourn by contractors and others doing
work for the state or for any municipal-
Ity that has aeopted the eight-hour prln-
cipie. These i are merely examples oi
new legislation on the eight-hour ques-
tion during the year 1911. affecting' only
state or municipal work. ,
The states are also regulating more
and more the hours of labor ln Private
employments on an eight-hour basts. The
San Francinco charter, as ratified by the
California; legislature, now limits the
street' railway employes to eight hours a
day, the work to be done'. In ten con
secutive hours. .The eight-hour day Is
prescribed for miners ln Colorado and
Nevada and in Pennsylvania the hoisting
engineers ln anthracite mine are now re
stricted to eight hours a day. In Mon
tana the eight-hour limitation has been
and piano selections by reilie stover,
Anna McCague and Carrie House. The
diplomas were presented by J. J. Points,
then president of the Board of Educa
tion. . . ; '
The graduating exercises took place at
Boyd's Opera house that is, the old
fioyd, then comparatively new whch
held forth at the corner of Fifteenth
and Farnam. Our principal. Professor
Lewis, presided as master of ceremonies
There were two or .three little flower
girls, and no ban having been placed on
floral offerings, the stage was piled lilsh
with a profusion of boquets showered upon
the several participants. When I took
my seat after the climax of my perora
tion a procession of flower girls headed
my way. I did not know Just what
was the hiatter for everybody around
me began to tliter and laugh and the
explanation soon followed. Here came
borne aloft In an open box, a beautiful
golden crook-neck squash, artletically
tied with green and yellow ribbon. I
bad a suspicion where it came from,
for certain folks tiad told me they were
going to get even with me for a prank
I had ones played, and my suspicions
were verified when I found the card,
which contained tha looked-for-name and
this particularly appropriate verse:
"I never loved a tree or flower,
- But 'twas the first to fade away,
I never nurst a dear gazelle
To glad me with Its soft black eye
But when it came to know me well
And love me It was sura to die!"
THE CARIBBEAN
and White for Supremacy.
a tactful division of offices at least peace
prevails under' the aegis of Great Britain.
Even In Jamaica's history there have
been tragic chapters, as all will admit
who can'' recall the race war of forty
years ago w'hen the blacks were so ruth
lessly suppressed by a minority driven
desperate. The "Jamaica massacres"
were a scridal that had no little Influence
on British politics.
' The French have had less trouble with
the colored people In their West India
possessions than other nations have en
countered, for the reason that their tol
erance on the race question amounts al
most to Indifference. Napoleon once said
that ln dealln, wlth Sant0 Domlngo ne
made a mlBtake; that ,nstead of atten,pt.
ing t0 8ubJugate the blackg he 8nould
hftvft Mnt a number of whlte otflcerg
,ngtructor$ t0 them and nave given tne8e
0fflcer8 orderi to m co,or w0
as a matter of policy. This typifies the
sentiment of more than one French col
onial administrator.
The Cuban whites have this advantage
they are In a great numerical prepon
derance ln the whole population. They,
too, seemed to live happily enough with
their colored neighbors under the old
regime, but with the establishment of
Cuban Independence, which opened new
possibilities of political action to the
colored race, trouble began, and has
continued until now it has developed
into full-fledged revolt. We may ulti
mately have (o govern Cuba. We have
been compelled In the last ' decade to
intervene by force at least once, and we
are now stopping short, only In the for-
mal diplomatic sense of another lnter-
vention. If we should be so unfortunate
as to be compelled to occupy Cuba per-
manently we are so forewarned by this
race war that there will be no excuse for
us if we are not forearmed also.
extended to railroad and other tunnels
as well as to mines. All these recent
advances toward the eight-hour basis in
both public and private employments
have taken place in widely separated
parts of the country and they reveal the
pressure that seems to be slowly but
surely establishing the eight-hour prJn-
eiple as the Standard for general use ln
occupations wherein this limitation Is
either desirable or enforceable.
No one, Indeed, can survey the new
labor legislation of the year 1SU, state
labor, without being Impressed by the
bulk of it and also by the progress thus
made toward satisfying labor's demands
for better working condition.
The most notable features of labor
legislation in the United States ln 1911,
acqordlng to the federal labor bureau,
were the movements for employers' lla-
bility and workmen's compensation laws,
for uniform regulation of the employ-
ment of women and children and fyr
more rigid factory and mine Inspection
Occupational diseases also received much
attention, six states taking steps to
secure authoritative reports on the
Question. Of workmen's compensation
"nimlsslons to Investigate the subject of
accident insurance ror wage earners a
lar8" number were created, showing the
"vel 'nterest cemg taken In the matter.
Tnr 1'ttle doubt that within ten
y'anl mod'ri legislation ln this line will
nav Deen enacted by most of the states
,n ln union-legislation making for
"eal Justice" which the courts will sus
tain.
POLITICAL SNAPSHOTS.
Chicago News: Of course Colonel Roose
velt did not have William Fllnn of Pitts
burgh in his mind when he talked about
the bosses who should be thrown out.
Houston Post; From battle and murder
and from sudden death, , from political
four-flushers, bunco steerers and fake
reformers, from demagogues, idiots and
ambitious crooks, front hot sir emitters,
pestiferous plehunters and . bombastic
barnsormers, good Lord, deliver us
t- ixuis Kepuonc; rot long ago
Massachusetts elected a democratic gov-
ernor and the other day while digging a
poet hole at Monmouth Beach, a werk-
wan found a tin pall containing flS.OOO.
u simply cant-tell what treasure
you'll unearth . when . you scratch the
surface of Massachusetts these days.
.. Pittsburgh Dispatch: Mr. Medilt Mo-
Cormick quiets the fears of the timid
as to what may happen at Chicago if
things do not go as the colonel wants
them. In that case McCormlck reassure
us the Roosevelt men "would shoot the
roof off the convention." Is that all?
Jack Abernathy ought to get up mors of
a circus than that.
looking Backward
TirisDay in Omaha
COMPILED FROM Dfcfc Hlt
JUXE 18.
Thirtj Years Ag
Haverly's Mastodon minstrels,
"Billy" Rice as chtef fun-maker,
been sooring a hit at the Boyd.
with
have
The funeral of Fred Lang was con
ducted under auspices of the Knights of
Pythias. The pallbearers were Henry
iSlert. Samuel. Motz, August Boehme
Gustaf Fries, Jacob Plank and Hans
Toung. The guard of honor was com
posed of Gustave Wilke, William Rocho,
Joseph Muntag and Rudolph ' Prossln.
George C. Greaser acted as marshal and
J. J. Monell as assistant.
The Toung Men's Christian association
entertainment committee has concluded
to postpone the concert of plantation
melodies and war songs until early ln
the fall.
Eugene D. Phelps of Ford River,
Mich., and Miss Fannie E. Greens of
this city were married by Rev. Stewart
of the First Methodist church at the
home of the bride's parents.- Mr. and
Mrs. Warren E. Greene. The bride, who
has Just completed her twenty-first birth
day, wore a rich ecru silk with the cus
tomary orange blossoms in her hair. . .
Mr. Byron D..Bent of the Burlington
auditor's office, was the recipient of a
handsome bouquet from an. 'unknown
donor, to whom he extends thanks
through The Bee.
Webster Snyder is still figuring on
putting up a combination market house
and city hall on Jefferson square, for
which he has plans already drawn calling
for a structure costing about $200,000,
and all he wants Is a fifty-year rent free
lease from the. city of the land.
Twenty Years Atr
The third annual convention of the Ne
braska Business Men's association con
vened in the business block, at Twelfth
and Howard streets, with President S. M,
Crosby in the chair"and Secretary R: F.
Hodgin at 'his desk. Much ot the sue
cess of the organization was attributed
to the efforts of these two men. i-
The national competitive drill of mili
tia companies opened at-the 'fair grounds,
Governor Boyd and Mayor Bemls' being
there to make addresses of welcome to
soldiers from many states. The martial
men were attractive to large numbers
of ,bautif ul femininity and altogether the
opening was grandly auspicious.;.
The big ratification rally of republicans
at Exposition hall was a booming gun
for republican victory In November. John
L. Webster as presiding officer, gave
things a grand start and Edward Rose
water, David H. Mercer, former Gover
nor Saunders, Richard Smith; Henry
Bolln and E. M. Stenberg sat on the
platform, wliile Messrs Webster and
Rosewater .were speakers. The. princi
pal speaker of the day was Stephen A.
Douglas, Jr., of Chicago, . and when he
entered the big hall a tremendous ova
tion greeted him.
Hotel Mercer, a beautiful hostelry at
Twelfth and Howard streets, was thrown
open to the public by Dr. S. D. Mercer,
Its builder and proprietor. Don H. Por
ter, a well known hotel man, was in
charge as manager. E. S. Montrose, for
merly of the Paxton, was head day clerk
Snd Albert Conti, night, while Fred
Hartman, the well known caterer, had
charge of the culinary department.
Dick Thompson writes to The Bee from
St Joseph to protest that he is not dead,
as reports, stated, not even asleep-, but
much to the good among, the living.
This assurance brought Joy to many of
Thompson's "grieving" friends.
Ten Years Ago
Robert J. Clancey, . secretary to Gov
ernor Savage, came up from Lincoln ' to
lead the fight for J. H. Van Dusen, re
publican candidate for governor and
show the republicans of the Fifth ward
how to run their politics. The Fifth
warders, however, showed Mr. Clancey
that they did not need his help and Van
Dusen failed to get an endorsement of
his candidacy.
Fire from spontaneous combustion did
$10,000 worth of damage about midnight
at the Cudahy packing plant at South
Omaha. Loss was covered by insurance.
The largest class up-to-date ever gradu
ated from the high school, numbering
ISO, received diplomas at the Orpheum,
where the exercises were held. N. M.
Howard, vice president of the Board of
Education, made the annual address
and presented the diplomas.
Judge and Mrs. W. W. Slabaugh re
turned from Lincoln where they attended
the commencement exercises of'. Cotner
university. . . i -
Secretary John Wakefied of the Trans-
misslssippl exposition executive com
mittee, entertained the other members of
that committee at an informal lunch at
the Millard hotel, his guests being G.
W. Wattles, president; F. P. Kirkendall.
Edward Rosewater, Z. T. LIndsey and E.
E. Bruce.
People Talked About
Thomas W. Lamont, right-hand man to
Plerp. Morgan, got' his start as a finan
cier by handling the business end of a
school paper at the Phillips Exeter aca
demy. A Kansas sheriff has been ordered by
the court to open 18,000 bottles of beer
and pour the contents out. There should
be no difficulty In getting a large supply
pf harvest hands ln the Sunflower state
this year.
Frank A. Hardy, living . in Miami
county, Ohio, has Just given up the office
of Justice of the peace, at the age of 94
years. In the course of .his' life he has
held office for 109 yars, accomptihsing
this record by continuing two or more
positions at the same time. . '
Mrs. Maggie Carter of Wakefield,
Mass., started ln tae milk business nine
years ago with one cow. Today she owns
S herd of fifty Jerseys. Her daily milk
route includes six towns and more than
BOO customers. Mrs. ' Carter personally
supervises all the details of the business.
Miss Alberta Claire has made a horse
back Journey fronr Sheridan,- Wyo., to
Fhlldelphia ,100 miles. She started- on
September 10 and reached Penn's city
last Tuesday. She rode down -the coast to
Los Angeles and beyond; then sae struck
across the' continent She was tn the sad
dle every day; it wasn't a side saddle.
White preparing a lot of fish at "New
Bedford, Mass., Manual Goulart . of that
city found a diamond ring In a' large
tautog. He took the ring to a Jeweler,
who immediately offered hfm $50 for it,
but Goulard declined the offer because he
Interpreted the jeweler's eagerness to pay
ISO to mean that . the ring was. worth
much more money.. I
PASSING PILASANTEIES.
"Do you think that friend of ours adds
to his prestige by quoting the names of
great men of the past?"
"Undoubtedly. He raises his campaign
literature from the rank of current fic
tion to that of the historical novel."
Washington Star.
"Pink, I'm afraid you are wasting your
time brushing my hat. I don't seem to
have anything smaller than a $10 bill."
"I kin change dat all right, boss."
"Then you don't need, the tip. So long,
rink." Chicago Tribune,
"There Is a man in our block who
drove his wife from home last night, and
before all the neighbors, too."
.. "What a brute!"
"She didn't think so. He was trying
their new car." Baltimore American.
"A soft answer turneth away wrath."
quoted the Wise Guy. "Yes. but most of
us try a club first," replied the Simple
Mug. Philadelphia Record.
. "Father, what do you think of the re
call ?",'
"Weft my dear. I hardly know. Some
people think it is dangerous. But why do
you ask?"
"I sent Ferdy away last night, and
now I'm sorry." Detroit Free Press;
"What Impressed you most ln our great
city?" asked the native.
"Well." replied the man from the small
town, "I've been here for a week and I
noticed that nobody wears Sunday clothes
on Sunday." Cincinnati Enaulrer.
"You; will always find," said the soap
box orator, "that one thing balances another.-
For instance the present stiff
prices ln foodstuffs"
"Take the starch out of the consumer,"
put in a man in the crowd. Boston Tran
script. "So your son Is going to high school?"
"Yes."
"How far has he got?"
"To the point at which I seem to be an
Intellectual two-spot," Chicago Record
Herald. .
"Some fellows make great fools of
themselves. There's young McStab work
kQ3
til
Every big town is a small
town a n d the far-away
friend is a near-by neighbor
to him who owns a Ford.
Extend your range of action
and your pleasures. The
Ford has solved the automo
bile problem for the man who
values his dollars. It's light,
right, economical.
Seventy-five thousand new Fords go into
service this seasonproof of their un
qualed merit. The price is 9590 for the
roadster, $690 for the five-passenger car,
and $700 for the delivery car complete
with all equipment, f. o. b. Detroit. Latest
catalogue from Ford Motor Campany, 1916
Harney St., Omaha, or direct from the De
troit factory.
IMA TEA
Iced' or Hot
The Pure Food Tea
ONE TEASPOONFUL MAKES TWO CUPS
Publishes! by tha Growers of India Tea
WSS E AS
Fast dailv train service from Omaha and
Council Bluffs to Chicago, via the
Chicago & North-Vcstcrn Ry.
connecting at the
lines for all points
The 'Best of
Pullman drawing-room
.observation, buffet and
library free reclining
coacnes ana supero
Carte. . Tickets and full
CITY TICKET OFFICES,
1401 etHl f 401 ftmmm Strwi,
OMAHA. NEB
sm4 822 BrMtfway,
COUNCIL
ing his way through college rather tha.
ask his rich old aunt to help. him.".
"Yea. it's astonishing to see what rtdt
ulous things some men will do merely
retain their own 8elf-respect."-ChicaJ
Tribune.
"Ma, what is meant by the progress
party?"
"The progressive party, my dear? WhJ-
after each game. "-Detroit Free Press.
"Don't you think the coal mines ougl
to be controlled by the government?"
"T Tnloht if T rt)rtn"t know who COntrOllS)
the government." Life.
"I am going to learn to swim this sua,
mer." j
"I thoueht Georee taught you last sua
mer?" . ,
riut t am no loncer engaged.
George." Washington Herald.
APRIL, MAY, JUNE.
April came with cloud and shine.
With shower and fitful gust;
She seised the broom that March had 16
And raised an awful dust:
She wept and walled as she Is wont
Most every year to do,
Then beamed and smiled on every one
And disappeared from view.
Then in her stead came lovely May, ,
At fiit she smiled serene.
She coaxed the blossoms from the trees
And decked the earth with green;
Then suddenly she haughty grew, ,
And cold as cold could be;
She chilled the marrow in one's veins,
The sap ln every tree; -
She scowled and stormed until the flowed
Were frightened almost stiff,
She flirted with Jack Frost a heap, .
But now pray what's the diff;
For lovely June has come at last
With her hot suns to burn us
(And I sit shivering as I write, .
While father pokes the furnace.)
Yet June has many Joys ln store,
And we would gladly greet her;
No other month in all the year
Is lovlier or sweeter;
For she brings showers of rice and shoe
On men and maidens mating,
And "rah rah" yells of college .boys, ,. .
And sweet girls graduating. . ,
And here we welcome lovely June
With thrifts of glad elation.
And crown her queen of all the months)
Because she brings-vacation.
Omaha. BAYOLL, NE TRELB, ,
latter point "with all
East.
Everything.
sleeping cars, composite
library cars Booklovers
chatr cars, standard day
aimng cars service a la
information on spoliation to
BLUFFS, IA
