SILK HAT HARRY'S DIVORCE SUIT
7
N I OCTCHA I GOT C HA
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IN ts, 03 CtxT LAN 6. cH'
l-rSriPlt
1 i ' '"' Mil,,
Married Life the Second Year
They Go to
The Cause," a
- Thinks It's
By MABEL UEKBEKT UKNEK.
"Want to go to the lhetr tonlsht?"
Warren threw down a couple of tickets.
"Carson care me those he's always set
line; passes."
"What la It, dear what play?"
"Soma sort- of a
problem play or
other. The Cause'
I think It is
called."
"The Cause!'
Oh, that's what
I've been wanting
to 'see so much!"
"TJm, I thought
that was about
' your style. Tou've
always been keen
on those psycho
logical stunts,
Well, you'll have to
hurry. I'm not go
ing to dress."
"Oh, Warren,
you're not! And
they're orchestra
Keats FI That's
right down In front.
"Don't care where
it Is. Lots of men go to the theater in
business suits now you even see them. In
bozrs. And I wouldn't, get into a drss
suit tonight If they'd give- me the show."
"But, Warren"
"Now, see here, if you want to to go
as I am-all right If not don't we'll stay
at home."
And Helen realized the frutlltty of say
ing anything more. It was Just 8:10 when
they reached the theater, and the play
was announced to begin at 8:16. The
usher led them down the red-carpeted
aisle to their scats.
Helen took off her hat and pinned it
on the back of the seat in front of her.
Then she looked around at the well
filled house. There were hardly any
seats left In the orchestra, and all the
boxes were taken. She turned and looked
up fit the balconies they, too, were
filled.
Helen was keenly conscious that all
the men around them were in evening
clothes. She wanted to call Warren's
attentton to this, but refrained, know
ing It would Irritate him.
A beautifully gowned woman with her
escort now swept Into the row just In
front Of them. Helen caught th- subtle
odor of a French perfume as she threw
back her opera cloak. Her blonde hair
was elaborately dressed with jewelled
combs, her gown, cut very low, displayed
the Ivory white neck and shoulders.
She was unquestionably very beauti
ful. And her escort, a tall, faultlessly
groomed man, was bending toward her
with evident pride and admiration.
Helen felt suddenly very plain and In
significant. Her simple Jlttle gown
seemed cheap and ordinary compared to
the expensive elegance of the one before
her.
The curtain rose now and Helen's at
tention was turned to the stage.
; The scene was the library of an Eng
lish country house. A young woman In
an exquisite pale blue morning gown (the
' kind you never see off the Mage) was
arranging some flowers In a vase. Helen,
who, in spite of all her idealistic tender
ness, was a realist at heart, often won
dered at the lack of realism of stage
gowns. Possibly It is because the actress
Would Happy
HAT5 50Xr4LY
.SSSUT-AMME AN
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IPHQNE AN OATOH;
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r
Problem Play, but Warren
"Rotton."
Insists on very beautiful and expensive
gowns, regardless of their suitability.
The "problem" turned out to be the
Inevitable triangle one the love of a man
for a woman not his wife. And the first
act closed with an affecting scene be
tween the husband and wife. The wife,
who" does Tot know of h'er husband's
faithlessness. Is plteously trying to re
gain his love.
Helen was glsd of the applause and
the repeated curtain calls, as It gave her
time to wink back the tears before the
lights flashed up. Even then she bent
over her program as though intent on
the cast of characters.
" 'Act II The drawing room the next
evening,' " she read aloud. " 'Act HI
A lodging house In Oow street six months
later. Well, It's beautifully staged, and
John Hargrave is very good don't you
thlnkT"
"He's 'all right." assented Warren,
"only he overdoes It in parts."
Helen made several other comments on
the play, the setting and the actors, but
as Warren only answered In monosylla
bles she turned to the advertisement In
the program. 1
There was the Inevitable skin food with
the actress endorsement, the popular
Scotch whisky, the fashionable taller with
his "fall and winter models," the familiar
brand of chocolates, and the Broadway
restaurant announcing a special after
theater supper all on one sage. On the
next waa a tooth paste, a table sauce
and a column on "The Well Dressed
Man."
"Oh, listen, dear," reading: "'Quite as
many cutaway coats are now braldless as
braided, the custom of braiding them
having been so overdone that it has be-'
come unacceptable to some men.' Now
you won't have yours braided, will you?
No matter what the tailor says?"
"Wasn't going to anyway. But. that
thing wouldn't influence me: I'm not
following the styles of a theater pro
gram." Here, 'to men, who had crowded past
them when the curtain fell, now re
turned.. Again Helen stood up, clutching
at the things In her lap her purse, pro
gram and opera glasses while they
pushed through.
The curtain rose now on the second
act.
In this act the wife discovers her hus
band's disloyalty. In a somewhat melo
dramatic scene ah confronts hint with
the proof. Bhe cries out that since sbo
no linger has Als love she will accept
nothing else. Bhe will go away that he
may have the woman he has preferred
to her.
The man, baffled and at bay, tries to
explain that it wasn't love that it was
only an Infatuation. But the wife will
accept no explanations. She rushes into
her room, returning In a long wrap and
a big feathered hat. And the curtain
falls and she weeps off the stage and,
presumably, out of the house, "forever!"
leaving her husband 'Standing helplessly
looking after her.
"What rot!" murmured Warren. "As
though any woman would leave her home
like that!"
"You mean she wouldn't go?"
"Well, she wouldn't go in an evening
dress and an opera cloak. She'd prob-
Hooligan Go
gatom: l HUP TDUat.
CQMlHG tow show:
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ably have sense enough to put on street
ulothesj and at least take . her tooth
brush!"
"Oh, Warren, don't please don't be
cynical. In some ways It Is a very, won
derful play."
"Wonderful! It's wonderful . that the
people will stand for It, and they call
that realism There's 1 almost as much
realism In that as there Is In" paus
ing for want of a comparison, v
"The next act is 'A lodging house In
lower street, six months later,' " said
Helen, reading from the program. .
"Huh, I suppose it takes them six
months to find they can't live' without
each other. He'll probably discover her
working as a seamstress In wretched
lodgings, and will come up after her with
a sable coat on his arm and a sixty-
horsepower car tooting outside. He'll
wrap her In the coat and carry her out,
leaving a bunch of bills as big as your
fist for the landlady."
And, curiously enough, the last act was
very much as Warren had said.
'But how did you know, dear?" asked
Helen as they made their way out. ''Did
you read a review of the play?"
J' A review? Tou don't have to read a
review to know what the third act will
be when you've seen the other two. ' I've
yet to see one of these plays that I
couldn't dope out the last act as well as
the author. They're all alike. Originality
Is the last thing to expect."
And Helen, much Impressed, was firmly
convinced that if Warren would only try
he could write a better play than any of
the modern playwrights.
klas Thick sal Tfcla.
The Missouri supreme court believes
that "those who till a public position must
not be too thin skinned in reference to
comments madvupen them,'' and experi
ence shows that most of them are not
only not too thin skinned, but a good
many of them are not thin skinned
enough. Indianapolis News.
r fill
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to the Horse Show? Soint'nly!
WAS
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OMAHA, MONDAY. NOVEMBER 27, 1011.
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Little Bobbie's Pa
By WILLIAM
Poor Pa, he got a awful tuff deal the
other nlte, he sed he got Into the mlddel
of a strike, . the street cleeners. He
dldent look like the salm old Pa wen he
got hoam. He was all over mud 4k.
brlckdust. ,
The way Pa calm to git into the strike
was like this, he sed: Pa's college class
was giving a maskerade ball, & I toald
Ma that he wud like to have her go, but
Ma had a engagement with the MUl-tant
Matrons that nite, -to deliver a address
beefoar the club, entitled "Tliay say
Wimmen Ilepeat too Much A Thay dnant
even Voat Onst."
How are you going to mask for this
maakerade? asked Ma,, Well, ted Pa. I
thought of several dlffemt deesinus, but
finally I thought that it wud be a very
nice idee if I ehud go as a ensign.
A what? sed Ma,
A ensign, sed Pa, a naval omlfr. ' I
Ought to look swell in this white duck
sute, sed Pa. Wall till I go in the next
room and put It on, Pa sed. It la neerly
time that I ehud be on the way to the
ball, anyhow. Then Pa went In put
OB, his white, duck Auto A his white cap
with goald braid, A wen he calm out he
sed Well, how do I look?
Ma began for to laff. Tee hee, ecd Me,
you look, like a new, white lanvas sail,
bellying out beefoar tha breezv What
do you think he looks like, Bobble? Ma
asked of me.
X think he looks like a new r-hite sack
full of flour, I sed.
Pa got awful red In the face then, A
he went out of the door without ssylng
goodnite. Then Ma took me oaver to the
meeting & she made ber speech stout
voating, tt then we had sum Ice cream
A cakes A then Ma got a taxi A we rode
hMiew-'j.r n f tIh ' ' i k .
f ?! i"
Where to Take 'Em
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h'.n ' )
co HQ err is me. esiT actor.
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hoam swell. Ma always gives me a time
wen I talk ber out.
Then Ma A me red the tnagaseens urtll
neerly mldnlte, A jest as I waa gulng to
bed Pa calm home. Pa looked awful. He
was all beet up. He dldent have a white
spot left In his ensign sute that he had
wore to the ball, he was all oovered with
red dust from the bricks wlch had ben
thrown at him.
Well, sed Pa, when he fell Into the
room, I have broken the backbone of (he
strike. I knocked then right and Uft
Ilk ten pine, sed Pa, you ehud have ben
there. You see, sed Pa, wen thay caw
this white ante wich I wore to the inask
erade,. thay thought that I was a white
wing, so they, got after me. Yes, sed Pa,
thay got after me with bricks A' palms
A everything, but I tore right Into them,
bare fisted, Pa sed, A mowed them down
In rows. Then thay broke A run, Pa sed,
wich waa ot to be wondered at, consid
ering i he fury jf my ruack.
I see, sed Ma, A she looked at Pa care
fully like. Cum cloase to me, deerest,
sed Ma, and let me look at all this brick
dust on yura white sute. Ah. sed Ma,
wen Pa calm close, I see. I am going to
be a Sherlock now, sed Ma. You calm
In by way of the kitchen, dldent you,
deerest? I saw you.
Now, Bobble, sed Ma, go out A git tha
dish In wich we keep the brlrk dust for
scouring knives, Ma sed. I filled It this
afternoon with fresh dust. I went A
got the dish A It was nearly empty.
I thought so, sed Ma, another of yure
all-bit. Tou took my prepared brick dust
A rubbed It on yure uniform. A so you
broak the backbone of the strike A got
pelted with bricks, sed Ma.
Then Pa got so red in the face that his
red clothes looked white aggenn.
I Ji' ':'!:
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MBKahBeaw w It 111' 111' I I
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By Tad
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(4 THAT PlETPorT"
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thai
PAOtiHrt.
if''
The Story of
and the
. By TUOMAS
. We ured to read stories in which
angels talked with men. Every school
boy and girl remembers Ahou Ben Ad
hem and what the angel did for him.
Well, here la another tale, different from
that one, but with an angel In It.
A rich man lay on Ma bed so III that
everyone thought he would surely dlo.
He was iiot really a bad man; but he
had - mail many people suffer that he
might beoome rich. Consequently very
few, who knew of his illness, cared
whether he died or not.
One night, so he told me afterwards,
an angel appeared, to him and ssld:
"Are you ready to die?"
Being a business man who never
minced words with any one, he replied
very shortly! '
"Certainly not. I have much work yet
to do and I csnrot afford to die just
now."
"Very well," said the angel, "you shall
live on certain conditions."
"Well," snapped the Sick man, "what
are they?"
"First," answered the angel, "I must
remind you of some things you havs for
gotten. Tha spirit in. man la eternal and
In. Its nature It Is pure and full of light.
Your wife, who Is the only human being
that loves you with understanding, has
such A spirit. Tou shall get well again,
Your ambitions wll) Increase. Your heart
Will desire many things and you shall
have them all. And one day you and
your wife shall die lit the same moment."
The man trembled. ,
"Do not fear," said the angel, "it will
be a long time hence. But In the mean
while remember this; ,
"Whenever you are angry your neck
will swell and tha veins will stand out.
Whenever you are afraid your lips will
curl up like the lips ef the wolf. When
ever you tell a falsehood your eyes will
be clouded. And whenever, ypu eauss
any one to suffer the light will leave
your oountenance."
While the angel spoke, tha sick man
had kept his eyes closed, but when tha
voice ceased he opened them cautiously.
The angel was gone and the man laughed
aloud:
"Well," he exclaimed, "that angel has
TTte Carnegie hero list now numbers V$.
Kxery perfsctly cut diamond has from
fifty-eight to sixty-four faoets.
Sound travels through the sir at ths
rate of thirteen miles A minute.
Two million dollara worth of sugar Is
made Into sweets every week In Eng
land.. The telephone rate in Denmark outside
of the Isrger cities Is about IU a year.
Nearly 23,900 children have now been
sent to Canada from England through the
agency of tha Bernardo Homes.
Wit
I to
mmm
1"
1 - 1
. : r i !
Nubs of Knowledge
11
-
OrrrlAt. Kit. 5tlml rtrM iMkHa.
y
l.l"lliilll"
the Rich Man
Angel ,
TAPl'EIL
no idea how modern business methods
train a man to conceal his emotions."
II.
In a few days ths msn was better and
In a few more he was at his business
again. He had many ambitions, his heart
was filled with desire and everything he
wanted he received, as the angel had
said.
Now In the course of his business the
msn was oftsn angry, but his neok did
not swell and the veins did not stand
out. He was often afraid when he tried
to get the better of other men. but hla Up
did not curl up like the llpa of a wolf.
He told many falsehoods, but when be
did so he looked the other man
straight In the face and hie eyes
Were not clouded. And wMh all the
money he made there came suffering to
others, but the light did not leave hla
countenance. '
Aa the years went by and success came,
tha man and tils wife grew apart. Neither
acknowledged It, and their friends did
not notice It. But . they knew, the
man and the woman, that their paths
were not Just the same.
Then the day came.
Both were killed in a railway acci
dent. III.
Now this Is where my knowledge of
this matter end. But one day I told
this atory to a holy man, one who reads
all things as easily as you res A these
words. And I said to him: ' A
"Let us suppose It was an angel that
spoke to the man, how oomea It that all
the angel said was made untrue hf the
trick a man learns In business, the trick
of concealing hla emotions V
And the holy man said In reply,
"It Is very simple. When the spirit
left the woman's body. It was pur and
full of light, as the angel aald. But when
the spirit left the man's body the heck
was swollen and tha vein stood out. The
lips were those of a snarling wolf. The
eyes were dim and tha countenance, In
stead of being full of light, was the color
of ashes." ' '
"And la such a spirit as that eternal v
I asked him. -.
And the holy man tald:
"I do not know." .
Gentle Cynicisms
Never Intimate that a woman la dull.
Just for that she might cut yeu.
It's better to be up and doing thin to
be down and being done.
About the hardest thing In tha world to
climb Is the stool ot repentance.
r.
Bom people feel they owe so much to
themselves that they never pay any
body else.
It la quite posslbl for a man to b hot
headed and still get cold fett.
The only way to make some dull chit
dren smart la with a twitch.
F. Opper