THE ECr OTXillA. CATOLVT, EZiTEMEZir SX 1TT3.
13
SILK HAT HARRY'S DIVORCE SUIT
The Jadge Sever Did Like Masher t
By Tad
H&FOeti SENOih VOO TO. "
vsiUrr TO TE-VlAx THAT 1
Ai o,tto c&a.sc - rrs -
ag'e j
. .
I I . '', i, wi ii i- L l! i .1 1 OON IKMOtM (F. I I I " - i I -m Cia-j TVA-r .. 1 II w.,-rr r -.."NI
I I bl.U' 1''" J I I I . i 1 1 KTUl-kLJ. ALOHff M 1- Tw AVI I I . - II I "1 ' W'l I
1 . J ) 7 j AnO i-oorc Oxcit the losrrai jTvfc -TElT
rWi ii s ilfek iwi
' . "i '
Jrrrr 'I .- -
If W oman Had Three Wishes,
What Would She Ask?
Leva, Protection lad Personal Beauty All Strive for the Last,
All Seek the Second and Every Woman Wants Love
More Than Anything Zlse in the World.
Br Mbel Herbert Uraer.
Cerrrlght, UU, National News Assort Uoa. , '
War tb f.taa to rr.nt to aach wom
on wlh th on tHln h uiti most
la th world It wou.d b Lov!
Wr th fatei to rant to emcta man
on wuh th 00c
thine he w&nu
most In th worid
It might be iovc
or It might be
power or wealth.
But with women
the Wish would be
universal.' T h y
may conceal It,
deny It, lie about it
In countleas way,
but In their hearts
they yearn for th
one thing lota.
And If th fate
V.
were to grant thre
wishes, as did the
fairy of th old
peasant legend, for
th woman, they
would still ail three
hinge on lova,
Lev, protection and personal beauty!
Bad h th courage to be wholly honest,
and ah so rarely aaa. the would be
the thing ah would aak for. Because
th ar th thing sh want moat.
No doubt ther ar many things that
would b mora commendable for her to
want than beauty. But this article 1
not wrtttea about th thing sh should
wane hut about thoaa ah doe want.
And sh want beauty because It would
make much more our hr gTatatr
need lova. Tern will say nobility of mind
and character would do that. Possibly.
But tho ar thing vry woman be
lieve ah can attain for herself. They
do. not have to be grant by a apeclal
dispensation of fata
And I am not sur hut that she Is right
Olvn th happlnee that would com
from lov and protection. It would not be
hard to cultivate an exemplary disposi
tion. Oat Wish tn Hataas Mlcht Baam
t Cover All.
Doubtl soma on will say her that
if on ha three wishes, why not wish
for happiness, which would cover every
thing tor. in th and. that is what all
our wishes ar to attain.
But w prefer to chooa th form of
our happtneaa On of th very happiest
woeasa I know la my good-natured, slov
enly washerwoman. Tet how many of
us would be willing to become a good
natured, alovaly washerwoman In order
to be happy?
Bhould you deny that personal beauty
would be on of almost every woman'
thra wishes, you have only to look about
you at their frantic efforts to retain, at
" tatm or taiga it.
Suppose every woman should suddenly
eaaa struggling to keep th physical at
traction she has, or to restore those she
haa lost, or to acquire those she has
never bad. fiuppo every woman should
be content t discard all the artifice or
toilet and gown and drees as simply a
men drees. How many hundred thousand
firm would go Into bankruptcy?
Try t ecmoelv of thi In its vaatnaaa.
Don't think only of the retail shopa
Think of all the great Jobbing, wholaeal
and manufacturing ooooarna that would
b dosed. Think of what per cent of
vary country' Industries ar for th
prodactioa of goods contributing to th
adammant and beautifying woman.
Think of th great business Interests cf i
. ..... .k.i.
uie worn niv ' '
to a woman's vanity. !
This may seem a digression. But H 1 J
to anticlpat. th. denial that on. af
woman's three wishes would be lor per-
onal attraction. Almost every woman j
would admit the f st two, but few 1
would be ban est enough t admit the
third, alany will say they would wish
for a las material thing o hlghf
cuality of mind or character.
But would they?
"ht proportion of a woman' tim
and money 1 spent on the Improvement
of bar mind or th elevation of bar oul
In comparison to that spent on her per
aonal adornment
Thar are, of course, exceptions t thi
as te everything. But it la of th aver
age woman I writ. And th avarags
woman would rather hav a beautiful
fac and a beautiful body than all th
knowledge of th Sphinx.
Drery XVmh Litre te Hav taase
Me Sac I.etvee lake far af He.
And the other wish Protection?
"tee cot every statu want It? Uow
- capable and aelf-eupportlng and
lngly self-sufficient so may be in
heart ah. yearn to b "taken
of."
bailev ao woman aver wlUlng!y stood
a. JX to laatmetlv for bar t want
to b sheltered, shielded and provided for
by th man she lova.
This Is, I know, a period of "careers"
for women. Ther Is much talk of ber
"freedom" and ber "lndepondenc." But
no woman really wants to be Independent.
No career, however brlliiant, can ap
pease a woman's heart hunger. For a
few years, perhaps, she may deceive her
telf Into thinking that It will that her
work or her art la sufficient. But sh
pays dearly for her sophistry. For, in
th end, comes th woman's inevitable
longing for "her man and her child."
AU th abstract admiration and praise
ot the world can never compensate to a
woman for th personal, ardent lov of
one man!
Ther la a woman I know who work
has been moat successful. Bh had
achieved both fame and money In her
chosen career. Bh Is wholly independent.
And yet I do not believe that she Is
happy.
Not long ago I chanced to call unex
pectedly. Her eyes .were red. Plainly,
sh had been weeping. '.
"Oh, has anything gone wrong any
thing about your workT" I asked anx
iously. My work my work!" sh laughed a
a little hysterically. "Does nothing mat
ter hut my workr Have I com to only
a machine? Am I never to be considered
as' a woman? Oh," defiantly, "I am so
much more wonderful than my work
and yet I am thought of only as a men
tality!
"But arn't you oontntT Hvrt you
everything?"
This Talented, aeeetl T7easaB
Had ETTirthlm hat Boas.
"Everything!" Bitterly. "Have I any
thinganything that a woman wants? I
haven't even a home! No," as I glanced
around th charming apartment, "this
isn't a home. Do you think any woman
can mak a bom alone? Oh, I'd glv It
all up tomorrow, all th sucoaaa. all th
fame yea. glv It up gladly and llv In
a Harlem flat on twenty dollars a week
end make It "hom' with a man I
loved!"
Which only goes to prove that rvery
woman, at least every woman who knowa,
would ask first of all for Love!
For without it. to a woman, nothing el
counts. ,
Some-Day" Land
J)
BY CHESTER FITtKIXS.
There Is a country fair and free.
Beyond the earth, beyond the aea.
Where people never disagree,
And always understand.
Ther everything's forever new.
There every happy dream eomea true.
As very well you Mow. a you
Have hesrrt of pme-Day" Land.
"WB,n-ii you buy me a ponr, pop?"
Some day. some oiy."
Tur.mm. hn tl th. m...,.
"Bome day, some day."
"Vncie. when U I b a man
a.. f y- can.
gome oay. some day.
la "Som-Dy" Land it nvr rain;
Or. If It doee. no boy remains
Indoors enaiaved by mother s chain.
All things are better planned. ,
You get Ire cream most every dayi
Till ten o clock you eon piay and play;
Me grown-up folks try to get gay
With boys in "Some-Day" Land.
"When'll . l.ave a ilo..r. Pop?"
"box dey, some day."
"When I get big. a n I be a eopf"
' Borne day, some day."
"Grandpa, when kia I be like you.
An' eat wtv my kaife, an' finger, toe.
An' never get licked fer wot I doT"
"Bom day. some day."
-'- v 1
MRS MfSNI&6.R rwt VUU.A0-E
SosiiP HAD TWA D0P Um Auu
NtliyHOOHS. (Mb VNOftKSO
THB iMwTTK:iv AU. pS 9if !!,
OTA (Umn TV t STTttn a,r-0
ATMift-MT MirEntO LKs a
-Oi- THE-a.6 NAi A R.vr?tJ
INTVtsl MOi Nfi-t-T 000ft. Nlf
CTl lJc GOT HOwi a ATE. Mb?
fUiARaTD i-lsraT 4-iOr. M fCi
WcSsni&ET-HstA.o it ttnV
IP VNH t"tWT O PAliEV
I CAvR NOT VAJMAT STEP
5fAtt
VPT
0y. Oisfi Pipe 3t
OOMP
SVKKT IN AT S A-SA. Oltx
AAV
U A. fEVi TT-E ti - CrMUlV
kHEEU
. TO THE VNOOOJ
31
Sherlocko
THE EPISODE OF THE RELEASED
ISOMQ SNEAK. THIEF'
HAS STCntH MT THREE
ICAMAR.IE& VET WEXE
IF THe R.EA.T M cuctlivrn
IWW nt-LP ME DETECT
Ska At IIuIwsm,
Last spring a mulatto woman waa ad
mitted to one of the insane asylums of
Missouri. An account sent to th London
Lancet aay that from the time shs
waa admitted, suffering with dementia
until sh died In the hoapital. she never
showed th least sign of disease of the
digeetlv aystasa. Th attend ami
,sLA-' LU TO INFER THAT THOSE OXNAStlES THET NR -
--Ti lrREt Ae the missing SoH,na, in &Vf i)
i&TtX Than in The ) I 4HVe STUMBLED UPOnJ A -
2TVi i OUTSIDE ' THAT BIRDSEED 1 "T
TH6 Alt t " " " " SOMal.NeRVO, JUST BEO"
Birdseed esbsA too needed somctm.k in (. uViLr the
AT THE E&OE CHICH TO fctEP TDUK UVE fWr) CAwAfcies wetE
y T XVX0' CONTRA RL-T fiJ,L
K i V fin w DEAtl- vrA"Vr
r T r w 6t Ro,,ni out tc rvTia.. Jr v x' I
K r- 1 I I THAT fHEXMAAi we 25 V J
-'U" SOLV THE .
M irj not rna vfN' H W tjttTi Tnfc'OiSE mo txs
OPf.w M OvCS. TH. 'A06f BwT U T THt ' AMMCR.
MAD DClOT Ht V0Oi-O fcrtO T Au,
C-A?t.it& GSMEMiKNfc VEBt OE Irf nf.
hao ji.(ppE him th FRasre-p
l&iTS SO CtwPE fiOO-EO
OVjC. ro THE EXO or THE Pit-.
CASTN- M,t pMSfmfii POWN
(mtb rnt. 0i6 DAI hc
Mjero Mi AAni to 00 rvta
tJoo. Hi. iroppm.9. a
Vllfi0 Cfly C0a FltOeA TM1
ORtrXV 0f THff ieTA,. mC
i-liTaTPw0. IT vMMil6iP.
VJHA.Ck'.'JXHHK:'
THtiCArFOuO UP Bovi
bRtM(r ' im UP HOtE..
THt 1A wN. 0
AFTtie. THAT ITKlSAT6
COT TMt I
SFAVJ 6" THi FROfT- I
AsWN AMD IV 1 0 AT
NlortT I 6-flT MOTHH' J
to but e:e- thc
T30t-TiS.r-S AN
TMCM atoCaVl
- THET 6ETA
BAR.fi OX- 0
the Monk
Come wati.
T
nne must
6J BJ-M
saw bar picking up nail and pins, hut n
on had seem bar swallow any. Death
wa du to nephritis.
An autopsy showed that in addition
to foreign bodies in the stomach ther
was a need) In th oesophagus and an
other ax th baa of th left lung. Th
foreign bodlea la th atomach weighed
1.261 (ram lOva pewads, avatrdunota) la
3l
TVife CTOfO AT TME AvaTOM
saVT VKfc P;.aAc.iM&. TutiR,
Htcrs vwATcwifr TMt Ant&n
PaTfo-w AmO JO imTE JVCiTETi
THAT MOT A lOUMTi tJCAparn
TmP t,oi
HMS jrEVBMj COST Li J J Ar
HT 0.y;Mdl hch.oij.th
FiCur jt That 'MOMEhT ah
airrNO rMS. itaAfMO"
ro hij Att rvftniTD ro rvt mob
AMt vkitLCO
IFTH& 6IANT COP THE
THt OWrvAPiC 5 HOT
SEP-
HOTHIrt
m I Jfl I 1 ut
smofLt. M : .
By Ons Mager
Oormrtt. Mil. NstMoal
New AJwaclattoa.
CANARIES
HARfitY t.WAL0W TMt
the agrracat. after thorough washing,
and consisted of U nails. 42 screws.
IX ordinary ptna. 110 hair pins. 106 aafety
pin. Q carpet tacit. Q button and a
miscellaneous col lectio af bolts, jnetal
But, teaspoon handle, thimble, needles.
rack hooka, fruit aeeda
of glaaa and all !
and hap f atmllar e&jecta. th total
number tats? IA.
1 ' vvur 1
i. i L V 1
The Feminine Diplomat
By DOROTHY D1X.
Hat off, sister suffragists, and let'
glv three cheers altogether for th pres
ident of Uruguay, who his just appointed
a woman to a diplomatic post. Hip, hip.
hurray! Way he live forever, and
hold office until
h is tired of it.
and go down in his
tory covered with
glory.
The woman who
bae been thus hon
ored, - and who 1
th first to enter
the diplomatic ser
vice of any country
in the world. 1
Mis Clotllde Lulsl,
who holds a uni
versity degre of
doctor of laws,
and she has been
guayan legation at
tache of the Uru
guayan Legation At
Brussels, Belgium.
The appointment of thi woman to a
diplomatic post marks an epoch in
feminine annals, and yet diplomacy is
th one career in which both nature
and experience have fitted women to
ahlne, and for which they have served
an arduous apprenticeship In subtlety,
and finesse, and Jollying, and backing
and filling, and generally walking on
Kg.
A a matter of fact, every women
entire training, from the cradl to th
grave, is a continual drilling In diplo
macy, for her comfort and well-being
In life depend upon her ability to
soft soap her way through th world
and wheedle advent- out of men
that they have ino Intention of giving
her.
Any woman who has lived In peace
with a cranky and cantankerous man.
or who ha gotten p'.n money out of a
stingy one, can show just cause and
reaoon why she 1 capabl of filling
any place in diplomatic circle that
may happen to be vacant.
W'hen a man acquires the ability to
smile sweetly and affectionately whn
he would Ilk to be batting the other
fellow in the y; whea he appear to
back down whn be 1 really advancing
forward all th tlme; when he flatters
bis opponent into yielding him what he
wants: when he lay a trap so cunningly
that his adversary walk into It with
out perceiving whither he is going, why.
we get out th bras band and celebrate
that man' wonderful diplomatic genius.
But any sort of a little two by four
woman Is capabl of such diplomatic
coupa. And. moreover, eh execute
them every day of her Ufa, or la Reno
would be the largest and most densely
populated city on the face of the earth.
Think you It is a mere matter of cbanc
that on the particular day on which little
Mrs. Smith had to ask Mr. Smith, who
is a tightwad, for th money to pay for
her new fall outfit shs happened to have
all of hi favorlt dlahe for dinner, and
that she did not mention th matter to
him until after he waa gorged to reple
tion and in a mellow and malting mood?
Did you aver notice how deftly Mr.
Brown alway turna the conversation
when It approachea certain subject! that
r
3 r-r-if-
v V.V
The Manicure Lady
a
'Baa ball and horse. bae ball and
boraes," sighed th Manicure Lady.
'Honest to goodness. Oeorga, I haven't 1
beard fa much of that kind of talk tnc
I went Into th buelnea of doing gems'
nails. It makes me good and tired, too.
What in the world do they buppose a girl
cares about base ball and horses?
"It's bad enough that a lot of ex-bookmakers
sits around bar sighing and tell
ing about the days of their former great
nee. Soma of them can't gat aaythtng
ana mop ana tai swui me races up in
Canada, and try to figure out om way
to beat a race for a two-eae note.
There wa a tim when they gave five-
dollar bills for tips, them dasnlng young
peculator. Ther waa a time whan
they talked ao much about horse and
thought a much about horses that they
had long hair on their necks, like manes.
Now they just sit and sigh.
"And this base ball chatter! Merc).
George, I. d ur get tired of it- Will
th Giant win th pennant T 'Will
Matty be fit for th world' aeri?"
W111 Marquard b able to take tura and
turn about with hlmT 'Will McOraw
outgeneral Connie Mack? Bab! If X saw
a base ball rolling down hl'.l I would turn
and kick it on its way."
"Vou gotta remember, kid," said the
Head Barber, "that a lot of people Is
Interested In baseball. 1 don't expect
that girls would care much about It.
secauae It require a lot of Quick aud
deep thinking, and that la aomachinT
tar w adoa a girl wa vr a far."
I
J
are Ilk a red rag to a mad bull to Mr.
Brown?
Did you never marvel that Mr. Smith
era, who 1 ten time as intelligent and
well informed as Mr. Pmlthers. should
apparently always be Bitting at his feet
and looking up at him as an oracle?
Tou have. Of course. But th explana
tion of these phenomena never struck
you. Tet the answer Is plain. A. Talley
rand In petticoats was handling th situa
tion. Mrs. Smith knew exactly the
proper time and aeaaon to tackle her
husband on the money question. Mr.
Brown was perfectly aaare that the or.l,
way to get along with her irascible )or
and master was to keep his fur ruhbed
the right way. Mrs. Smlthers worked
her egostic spouse by making him think
that he knew It all and originated eveiy
idea, and then she did aa she pleased.
Have you not yourself, Mr. Married
Man. suddenly found yourself doing the
thing that you had sworn by all your
goda you would never, never Co, and
going to a place where ou had vovmvI
that wild horses couldn't drag you? And
you were doing it gladly. and cheerfully,
and, ao far aa you could tell, of your
own free will and accord. When you
analysed the change in your position you
couldn't have told, for the life of you,
when and where and how It came about.
But your wife could. 8he remembered '
very on of th insidious arguments
with which she plied you. She knotvs
just where she applied a pressure so
gentle you did not perceive It, but tljit
was as irresistible a th momentum of
a glacier that swept you In th dlrortlon
he wanted you to go. She knows whit
kisses and blandishments she used that
were your final undoing. It was diplo
macy, deer sir; feminine diplomacy, that
woman has been perfecting and culti
vating ever since the days of Mother
Eve, and with which no mere man is any
more able te oope in a hand-to-hand ftht
than a baby would be with Jack Johnson.
Of course you think, Mr. Lover, that
you discovered the shrinking violet of a
girl that you have persuaded to marry
you. Oh, no! It la to laugh. Long, long
before you ever really noticed her or
differentiated her from a dosen other
little pretty aklrts you knew, ah had
decided when you were going to pop the
question to her and what aort ot a wed
ding she was going to have, and had
picked out her bridesmaids.
You hadn't the slightest Idea of pro
posing the night you did and you think
It was jnertly by accident that yoi
BtroUeU with her out in the moonlight
or sat out a wall with her undar th
palm, and that It wa a ooinuidene that
her hand happened to touob your and
her cheek brushed your sleeve aud that
you spoke.
Bb know better. Ther would b no
mora weddings except that women beat
men at the diplomatic game and in the?
parlous, matrimonial times Jt la ea:ej'.
to cut an Intel national arliitraLoii treaty
signed than It la u lead a man up to
the altar.
AU of which merely goes to show that
th diplomatic tioid Is peculiarly woman
own, and that th woman who can man
age a man without hi finding it out Is
perfectly capabl of filling th position
of minister extraordinary and ambas
sador piaulpounliary to any foreign
court. 0
D
"Ch. I don't know so ui.h li&ouc
t!at." sniffed the Manleur Laay. - i
a rtadlng a article th other day bv
a lady philosopher in which she said
that ladies thought quicker and deer.
than genta. and that there wasn t a
thing in this world a gent tould o
that a lady could n't Jo better."
"Of uoursc, a lady philosopher would
aay mat, admitted th Head Baibei.
bot you couldn't get a mn to ajree
with her. What about th rr. .Kir,.,.
that have been done in this world vi
about the pyramids.' Who bulit thea-'
Was It women V
"It must hav been." replied the Man
fur Lady. -i-h, hilllor. bouk,
that they was buiit by slaves ."
"Wall, what about ih great soldier
of hmory?" the Head urr
to know. -What about Napoleon til
.uijus urant and Ulysses G. Lee and a
lot of other names like, that?"
"What about the Amaions?" demanded
th triumphant Manicur Lady, "Thy
auj uMiiea. tt least ao I read U th
history that I bar wrot. There wasn't
a nt la th crowd. And htoi-y sj
that they made in finest .
all tim."
"Why not?" asked th Head Darbwr.
"They had a great percentage wih lucxu
No real gent vouid strike a lady."
Two ladies, tor.iitid.ng tnr pretcder,
at the court of Charles V. appealed to th
aonarch. wh oeadt4,that the aldwr
should g first. luaputea of that char-
our swver aceurree tharvaftet.
1
1